WEBVTT FILE 1 00:00:02.000 --> 00:00:07.000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:13.000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:36.411 --> 00:00:38.288 First of all, let me get something straight. 4 00:00:38.371 --> 00:00:40.415 This is a journal, not a diary. 5 00:00:42.792 --> 00:00:44.544 When Mom went out to buy this thing, 6 00:00:44.627 --> 00:00:47.922 I specifically told her not to get a book that said "Diary" on it. 7 00:00:48.006 --> 00:00:49.549 But, of course, she didn't listen. 8 00:00:51.718 --> 00:00:54.012 It's been hard enough getting through the first week of middle school 9 00:00:54.095 --> 00:00:56.306 without carrying this thing around with me. 10 00:00:57.140 --> 00:00:59.768 Hey, this kid's got a diary. 11 00:01:01.978 --> 00:01:03.396 A-Actually, it's a jour-- 12 00:01:09.027 --> 00:01:11.738 If Mom's expecting me to write down my feelings or whatever, 13 00:01:11.821 --> 00:01:13.490 she's gonna be disappointed. 14 00:01:15.617 --> 00:01:17.744 The only reason I agreed to write in this thing at all 15 00:01:17.827 --> 00:01:20.038 is because one day I'm gonna be rich and famous. 16 00:01:20.121 --> 00:01:23.083 And people'll wanna read about my early years. So I'm doing this for them. 17 00:01:23.166 --> 00:01:24.959 -Greg is so smart. -So handsome. 18 00:01:25.043 --> 00:01:27.712 -So brave. -And he smells terrific. 19 00:01:29.506 --> 00:01:31.299 But for now, I'm stuck in middle school… 20 00:01:32.467 --> 00:01:33.677 …surrounded by morons. 21 00:01:36.596 --> 00:01:39.015 But luckily, I'm not alone in this middle school thing. 22 00:01:39.099 --> 00:01:42.102 My best friend, Rowley, is in the same grade as me. 23 00:01:42.686 --> 00:01:44.813 I doubt he's ever gonna be rich and famous, 24 00:01:44.896 --> 00:01:46.815 but it's good to have him around for laughs. 25 00:01:47.816 --> 00:01:49.943 Did you know if your hand is bigger than your face, 26 00:01:50.026 --> 00:01:51.945 it's a sign that your brain is shrinking? 27 00:01:52.028 --> 00:01:53.029 It is? 28 00:01:54.197 --> 00:01:55.990 Gotcha. 29 00:01:56.074 --> 00:01:59.244 But does this mean my brain is shrinking? 30 00:01:59.953 --> 00:02:01.371 Not sure. 31 00:02:01.454 --> 00:02:02.872 Let's check the other hand. 32 00:02:03.998 --> 00:02:05.792 I'm glad Rowley's along for the ride, 33 00:02:05.875 --> 00:02:08.128 because everything else about middle school stinks. 34 00:02:08.211 --> 00:02:10.380 And I can't believe it was just a week ago 35 00:02:10.463 --> 00:02:12.716 that me and Rowley were actually looking forward to this. 36 00:02:12.799 --> 00:02:14.300 Heads up! 37 00:02:21.766 --> 00:02:25.228 That was a good one. You almost hit the front tire that time. 38 00:02:25.311 --> 00:02:28.732 You just need to slow down a little so I can get locked in. 39 00:02:30.275 --> 00:02:32.235 -Let me get this straight. -Come on, Rowley. 40 00:02:32.318 --> 00:02:34.154 So in middle school, 41 00:02:34.237 --> 00:02:36.489 do you just go to a different room for each class? 42 00:02:36.573 --> 00:02:37.782 Come on. You got it. 43 00:02:37.866 --> 00:02:40.535 And you just carry all your stuff around with you all day? 44 00:02:40.618 --> 00:02:42.495 No, no. No, no, no. 45 00:02:42.579 --> 00:02:43.872 They give you a locker 46 00:02:43.955 --> 00:02:47.250 so you can just ditch the books you don't need in between periods. 47 00:02:47.334 --> 00:02:48.877 W-w-what about recess? 48 00:02:50.253 --> 00:02:52.172 There's still recess, right? 49 00:02:52.255 --> 00:02:54.549 I told you, like, a million times, Rowley. 50 00:02:54.632 --> 00:02:56.718 Recess is an elementary school thing. 51 00:02:56.801 --> 00:02:59.471 Aw. But I like recess. 52 00:02:59.971 --> 00:03:02.599 Are you gonna go, or are you just gonna sit there? 53 00:03:02.682 --> 00:03:05.560 Don't you want a turn riding? I've gone three times in a row. 54 00:03:07.187 --> 00:03:10.815 But you're way better at riding than me. I can never do it as good as you. 55 00:03:14.361 --> 00:03:15.362 Woo-hoo! 56 00:03:19.449 --> 00:03:20.658 - 57 00:03:26.623 --> 00:03:29.709 Oh, come on, Rodrick! You made me miss! 58 00:03:29.793 --> 00:03:31.252 I'm okay. 59 00:03:39.010 --> 00:03:40.845 One of the reasons I'm friends with Rowley is 60 00:03:40.929 --> 00:03:43.640 there aren't a whole lot of boys my age in the neighborhood. 61 00:03:44.349 --> 00:03:46.685 In fact, aside from Rowley, there's only really-- 62 00:03:46.768 --> 00:03:48.228 Fregley! 63 00:03:48.311 --> 00:03:50.563 Why, hello, Greg Heffley. 64 00:03:51.523 --> 00:03:54.943 Hi, Fregley. I was just, um, getting-- getting my football. 65 00:03:55.026 --> 00:03:57.570 Wanna come inside my house for a playdate? 66 00:03:58.071 --> 00:04:00.615 I can show you my room. 67 00:04:00.699 --> 00:04:04.327 You know, I'll definitely take you up on that offer sometime. 68 00:04:05.912 --> 00:04:06.913 Wanna see my… 69 00:04:08.415 --> 00:04:09.874 secret freckle? 70 00:04:13.795 --> 00:04:15.130 - 71 00:04:19.718 --> 00:04:21.928 Should we do that one over? 72 00:04:25.181 --> 00:04:26.349 Who's hungry? 73 00:04:37.485 --> 00:04:40.030 So, did everyone have a good day? 74 00:04:40.113 --> 00:04:42.824 Frank, don't do that with your food. It's weird. 75 00:04:42.907 --> 00:04:45.452 -It tastes better this way. - 76 00:04:45.535 --> 00:04:48.038 Hey! Oh! 77 00:04:48.121 --> 00:04:49.497 I'm still gonna eat it. 78 00:04:50.707 --> 00:04:53.293 Greg, is that dirt on your back-to-school clothes? 79 00:04:53.376 --> 00:04:54.961 Please don't call them that. 80 00:04:55.045 --> 00:04:57.339 What on earth were you doing to get so filthy? 81 00:04:57.422 --> 00:04:59.591 I was throwing a football in the street with Rowley. 82 00:05:00.342 --> 00:05:06.139 You were playing a sport with your feet and hands and not a device. 83 00:05:06.222 --> 00:05:07.265 Wo-- Wow. 84 00:05:07.849 --> 00:05:09.017 I guess. 85 00:05:09.100 --> 00:05:12.103 Mark the calendar, Susan. Greg here played a sport. 86 00:05:12.187 --> 00:05:15.231 You weren't playing that game with Rowley, were you? 87 00:05:15.315 --> 00:05:17.359 You know you're banned from playing that. 88 00:05:17.442 --> 00:05:19.652 Somebody is going to get hurt. 89 00:05:19.736 --> 00:05:20.737 What? 90 00:05:20.820 --> 00:05:22.364 Oh! Oh, that game? 91 00:05:22.447 --> 00:05:23.782 No. No way. 92 00:05:23.865 --> 00:05:25.658 You said we couldn't play that anymore. 93 00:05:25.742 --> 00:05:28.703 Right. And Rowley's parents are in full agreement. 94 00:05:28.787 --> 00:05:29.871 Mm-hmm. 95 00:05:29.954 --> 00:05:32.040 Okay, there. All clean. 96 00:05:36.628 --> 00:05:39.130 Speaking of Rowley, how's he feeling about Monday? 97 00:05:39.214 --> 00:05:41.633 Is he looking forward to his first day of middle school? 98 00:05:41.716 --> 00:05:42.926 Hmm. I'm not sure. 99 00:05:43.009 --> 00:05:45.470 I think he might be a little nervous, actually. 100 00:05:45.553 --> 00:05:49.557 Well, he's lucky to have you as a best friend. 101 00:05:49.641 --> 00:05:52.727 You know, that's all you need to get by in this world. 102 00:05:52.811 --> 00:05:54.562 One good friend. 103 00:05:55.313 --> 00:05:56.314 Yeah. 104 00:05:56.398 --> 00:05:59.734 And you're lucky to have a big brother 105 00:05:59.818 --> 00:06:03.113 who's already gone through the middle school experience. 106 00:06:03.196 --> 00:06:04.197 Right, Rodrick? 107 00:06:06.408 --> 00:06:08.118 -Rodrick! -Huh? 108 00:06:08.201 --> 00:06:11.413 Take off your headphones. You know the rule. 109 00:06:11.496 --> 00:06:15.125 Why don't you give Greg a pep talk about middle school? 110 00:06:15.208 --> 00:06:17.419 Greg's going to middle school? 111 00:06:17.502 --> 00:06:18.837 Yes, Rodrick. 112 00:06:18.920 --> 00:06:23.341 Why don't you tell him what he can expect on his first day? 113 00:06:24.592 --> 00:06:27.679 Here's what you need to know. 114 00:06:29.889 --> 00:06:32.892 First of all, watch where you sit on the first day of school, 115 00:06:32.976 --> 00:06:35.520 because your teacher might make that your permanent seat. 116 00:06:37.522 --> 00:06:40.275 Next, don't use the bathroom on the second floor, 117 00:06:40.358 --> 00:06:42.444 no matter how bad you have to go. 118 00:06:42.527 --> 00:06:45.488 -There aren't any doors on those stalls. - 119 00:06:45.572 --> 00:06:49.117 And finally, whatever you do, 120 00:06:49.200 --> 00:06:52.287 don't get the Cheese Touch. 121 00:06:52.370 --> 00:06:55.457 'Cause if you do, you might as well be dead. 122 00:06:57.917 --> 00:06:59.002 Thank you, Rodrick, 123 00:06:59.085 --> 00:07:01.171 -for that wonderful pep talk. - 124 00:07:01.254 --> 00:07:04.257 Greg, please forget everything that you just heard. 125 00:07:04.341 --> 00:07:06.551 Especially the nonsense about the cheese. 126 00:07:06.634 --> 00:07:09.346 But wha-- what's the Cheese Touch? 127 00:07:10.430 --> 00:07:12.974 It all started in my first year of middle school. 128 00:07:13.058 --> 00:07:14.893 No one knows where it came from 129 00:07:14.976 --> 00:07:16.561 -or who put it there. - Don't do it! 130 00:07:16.644 --> 00:07:17.937 One day… - Stay away! 131 00:07:18.021 --> 00:07:20.523 …a slice of Swiss cheese appeared on the blacktop. 132 00:07:20.607 --> 00:07:21.608 Ew! 133 00:07:21.691 --> 00:07:22.692 At first, 134 00:07:22.776 --> 00:07:24.235 -no one would go near it. -Ugh! 135 00:07:24.319 --> 00:07:25.904 And then one day… -Hmm. 136 00:07:25.987 --> 00:07:28.531 …a kid named Darren Walsh got curious. 137 00:07:28.615 --> 00:07:29.824 No way! - 138 00:07:29.908 --> 00:07:32.786 And that's what started the Cheese Touch. 139 00:07:33.787 --> 00:07:38.291 The only way to get rid of the Cheese Touch is to give it to someone else. 140 00:07:40.418 --> 00:07:41.878 Then one day… - 141 00:07:41.961 --> 00:07:44.172 …a kid named Abe Hall moved to California. 142 00:07:44.923 --> 00:07:46.424 He took the Cheese Touch with him. 143 00:07:46.925 --> 00:07:48.635 But the cheese remained. 144 00:07:48.718 --> 00:07:51.471 And to this day, it sits on the blacktop, 145 00:07:51.554 --> 00:07:54.516 waiting to strike again! 146 00:07:54.599 --> 00:07:56.393 Well, that's terrifying. 147 00:07:56.476 --> 00:07:58.853 Don't let Rodrick scare you, Greg. 148 00:07:58.937 --> 00:08:00.939 Middle school's gonna be fun. 149 00:08:01.022 --> 00:08:05.402 Oh, and please don't mention the-- the cheese thing to Rowley. 150 00:08:06.027 --> 00:08:08.363 Honestly, it-- it'll scare him half to death. 151 00:08:09.155 --> 00:08:10.323 Who's Rowley? 152 00:08:10.407 --> 00:08:11.408 Greg's best friend. 153 00:08:11.491 --> 00:08:14.494 You know, the kid who's over here almost every single day. 154 00:08:14.577 --> 00:08:15.829 Oh, him. 155 00:08:15.912 --> 00:08:18.039 I thought you were babysitting that kid. 156 00:08:18.123 --> 00:08:19.874 We're the same age. 157 00:08:19.958 --> 00:08:21.793 He's the same age as y-- 158 00:08:23.712 --> 00:08:27.674 Oh, man. I thought he was, like, in kindergarten or something. 159 00:08:28.800 --> 00:08:31.052 Middle school's gonna eat him alive. 160 00:08:31.136 --> 00:08:32.137 Rodrick. 161 00:08:33.346 --> 00:08:36.057 Let me give you one last piece of advice, Greg. 162 00:08:36.141 --> 00:08:38.768 Middle school is every man for himself. 163 00:08:38.852 --> 00:08:41.688 You don't need some overgrown baby weighing you down. 164 00:08:41.771 --> 00:08:42.856 Rodrick! 165 00:08:42.939 --> 00:08:44.274 That's enough. 166 00:08:48.528 --> 00:08:50.739 Greg, come on, man. Trust me. 167 00:08:50.822 --> 00:08:53.616 Cut him loose now or you both drown. 168 00:09:25.774 --> 00:09:28.443 -You lose! - Woo-hoo! 169 00:09:28.526 --> 00:09:31.654 In your face, Greg! That's three in a row. 170 00:09:32.405 --> 00:09:33.406 Wanna go again? 171 00:09:33.490 --> 00:09:35.283 No, that's okay. We can shut it off. 172 00:09:35.367 --> 00:09:36.576 What's the matter? 173 00:09:36.659 --> 00:09:39.371 Afraid to lose? 174 00:09:39.913 --> 00:09:41.706 No, I'm just not in the mood. 175 00:09:50.882 --> 00:09:52.175 Rowley, cut it out! 176 00:09:53.551 --> 00:09:54.636 I mean-- 177 00:09:55.261 --> 00:09:57.514 Don't you think it's time to start acting our age? 178 00:09:58.181 --> 00:10:00.350 But you always do the chicken thing to me. 179 00:10:01.017 --> 00:10:02.811 It's not just that, Rowley. 180 00:10:02.894 --> 00:10:04.062 Look around this room. 181 00:10:04.145 --> 00:10:08.775 All these stuffed animals, that bedspread, and what's with this Joshie guy anyway? 182 00:10:08.858 --> 00:10:10.610 Joshie's from Europe. 183 00:10:10.694 --> 00:10:14.364 And you're just jealous because I discovered him first. 184 00:10:14.447 --> 00:10:17.701 Yeah, I'm jealous that you discovered some stupid pop star 185 00:10:17.784 --> 00:10:19.786 whose fans are only six-year-old girls. 186 00:10:19.869 --> 00:10:21.079 Joshie says, 187 00:10:21.162 --> 00:10:23.832 "Follow your dreams and respect your parents." 188 00:10:24.624 --> 00:10:26.751 Don't you think it's time to grow up, Rowley? 189 00:10:26.835 --> 00:10:28.211 You're in middle school now. 190 00:10:28.294 --> 00:10:29.671 Well, not yet. 191 00:10:29.754 --> 00:10:32.465 "Be friendly to one another, yes?" 192 00:10:32.549 --> 00:10:33.967 Come on, Rowley. 193 00:10:34.050 --> 00:10:35.635 Middle school's no joke. 194 00:10:35.719 --> 00:10:40.140 There's bullies, and bathrooms with no stall doors, and permanent seats, 195 00:10:40.223 --> 00:10:42.183 -and-- and-- -And what? 196 00:10:42.267 --> 00:10:44.436 And the cheese! 197 00:10:44.519 --> 00:10:45.937 What's the cheese? 198 00:10:50.817 --> 00:10:53.361 Please don't mention the cheese thing. 199 00:10:53.445 --> 00:10:54.863 It'll scare him half to death. 200 00:10:56.281 --> 00:10:57.282 You know what? 201 00:10:57.365 --> 00:10:58.825 Forget I said anything. 202 00:10:59.367 --> 00:11:02.871 Middle school's gonna be just fine. In fact, it'll be great. 203 00:11:03.705 --> 00:11:07.709 Yeah, 'cause we're in it together. Right, Greg? Friends till the end. 204 00:11:08.710 --> 00:11:10.503 Yeah, friends till the end. 205 00:11:20.055 --> 00:11:23.141 Hi, how was your summer? - My summer was awesome. 206 00:11:24.142 --> 00:11:25.852 No, I hate camp. 207 00:11:26.436 --> 00:11:28.688 Oh, my gosh, I love your backpack. 208 00:11:28.772 --> 00:11:30.648 Did your mom dress you this morning? 209 00:11:30.732 --> 00:11:32.275 Look at those high waters. 210 00:11:32.359 --> 00:11:35.862 I heard that Peter Mud and Alicia Tango got their braces stuck together 211 00:11:35.945 --> 00:11:38.114 -over the summer. -Move to the side, shrimp. 212 00:11:38.990 --> 00:11:42.786 -Come on. Let's go. I don't wanna be late. -But what about the-- the cheese? 213 00:11:42.869 --> 00:11:45.038 That's just some stupid fairy tale Rodrick made up. 214 00:11:45.872 --> 00:11:48.083 Stop trying to copy my style, please. 215 00:11:50.418 --> 00:11:52.629 Nice mom jeans, Kelsey. 216 00:11:53.463 --> 00:11:54.547 Hair color… 217 00:11:54.631 --> 00:11:57.258 You know, maybe this isn't such a good idea. 218 00:11:57.342 --> 00:11:59.219 Maybe my mom can homeschool me. 219 00:11:59.302 --> 00:12:00.512 -Come on, Rowley. - 220 00:12:00.595 --> 00:12:02.180 You can do this. 221 00:12:02.263 --> 00:12:06.393 We can do this. We just need to find our lockers and we'll be fine. 222 00:12:06.476 --> 00:12:07.727 Heads up. 223 00:12:07.811 --> 00:12:09.145 - Whoa! 224 00:12:10.772 --> 00:12:11.773 Ugh! 225 00:12:12.482 --> 00:12:14.776 But I gotta go to the bathroom! - 226 00:12:15.652 --> 00:12:16.653 Ugh! 227 00:12:24.244 --> 00:12:25.704 - 228 00:12:25.787 --> 00:12:29.082 …sanitary. 229 00:12:29.165 --> 00:12:30.792 Yep. Homeschool for sure. 230 00:12:30.875 --> 00:12:31.876 One step at a time. 231 00:12:31.960 --> 00:12:34.546 Don't make eye contact, and they won't even notice you're here. 232 00:12:34.629 --> 00:12:36.673 You better not be looking at my boyfriend, Kelsey. 233 00:12:36.756 --> 00:12:38.883 - 234 00:12:38.967 --> 00:12:41.219 Come on. I was eating that. 235 00:12:43.805 --> 00:12:44.973 - 236 00:12:45.056 --> 00:12:46.474 Help me. 237 00:12:49.644 --> 00:12:50.979 Mm-mmm. 238 00:12:52.355 --> 00:12:53.356 That was close. 239 00:12:55.066 --> 00:12:57.569 Kindergarten's down the street. 240 00:12:59.195 --> 00:13:00.196 Not so bad. 241 00:13:00.280 --> 00:13:02.365 And look. Our lockers are right next to each other. 242 00:13:02.449 --> 00:13:04.242 Yes! 243 00:13:05.493 --> 00:13:07.412 Look. They keep our schedules in here. 244 00:13:07.495 --> 00:13:08.830 Cool. Let me see yours. 245 00:13:09.414 --> 00:13:11.791 But they don't match. 246 00:13:11.875 --> 00:13:14.669 Well, we've got lunch together. We'll see each other then. 247 00:13:16.212 --> 00:13:17.672 Oh, hey! - See ya! 248 00:13:17.756 --> 00:13:18.965 What do we do now? 249 00:13:19.674 --> 00:13:20.759 We go to homeroom. 250 00:13:21.634 --> 00:13:22.719 Mine's right here. 251 00:13:23.303 --> 00:13:25.305 Yours is upstairs, I think. 252 00:13:25.388 --> 00:13:27.557 -There's an upstairs? - 253 00:13:28.391 --> 00:13:30.560 -Out of the way, runt. -Move to the side, shrimp. 254 00:13:30.643 --> 00:13:32.604 -Step aside, little man. -Yes, not for long, little man. 255 00:13:32.687 --> 00:13:36.649 Greg! What do I do? What do I do? 256 00:13:37.317 --> 00:13:38.860 There was no time to worry about Rowley, 257 00:13:38.943 --> 00:13:41.321 because I needed to focus on my own situation. 258 00:13:58.713 --> 00:14:01.800 I was glad Rodrick gave me a few pointers, so I knew what not to do. 259 00:14:06.554 --> 00:14:08.765 Oh, hey. - Yeah. Awesome. 260 00:14:11.726 --> 00:14:12.811 Uh… 261 00:14:15.814 --> 00:14:17.273 - 262 00:14:21.319 --> 00:14:22.320 Exactly! 263 00:14:23.905 --> 00:14:25.073 But it turns out… - Shh. 264 00:14:25.156 --> 00:14:27.325 …having an older brother who went to the same school 265 00:14:27.409 --> 00:14:29.577 isn't such a good thing after all. 266 00:14:29.661 --> 00:14:31.538 -Greg Heffley? -Huh? 267 00:14:31.621 --> 00:14:34.040 -As in Rodrick Heffley's brother? - 268 00:14:34.708 --> 00:14:37.460 You'll be sitting in the chair in front of my desk. 269 00:14:37.544 --> 00:14:40.505 - 270 00:14:42.257 --> 00:14:44.801 Oh! 271 00:14:44.884 --> 00:14:46.761 Bro, dude's with the weirdo. - 272 00:14:46.845 --> 00:14:49.806 Just about everything's different from elementary school. 273 00:14:52.559 --> 00:14:54.227 Wouldn't want to be him. 274 00:14:54.310 --> 00:14:55.979 Mm-hmm. 275 00:14:57.063 --> 00:14:59.691 And the biggest change is who's popular and who's not. 276 00:14:59.774 --> 00:15:01.735 -Back in elementary school, it was simple. - 277 00:15:01.818 --> 00:15:04.279 If you were the fastest runner, you were the most popular. 278 00:15:04.362 --> 00:15:05.405 -In fifth grade… - 279 00:15:05.488 --> 00:15:07.282 …the fastest runner was Ronnie McCoy. 280 00:15:07.365 --> 00:15:09.200 But now, all the rules have changed. 281 00:15:10.160 --> 00:15:12.662 Now it's all about whether or not you have cool hair 282 00:15:12.746 --> 00:15:14.914 and how many followers you have on social media. 283 00:15:15.749 --> 00:15:16.750 In middle school, 284 00:15:16.833 --> 00:15:19.586 a kid like George Deveney is at the top of the food chain, 285 00:15:19.669 --> 00:15:23.298 and Ronnie McCoy is scratching his head wondering what the heck happened. 286 00:15:23.381 --> 00:15:26.634 So what I'm trying to figure out is where I fit into all this. 287 00:15:26.718 --> 00:15:30.680 I'm sure I'm not at the top of the ladder, but at least I'm not at the bottom. 288 00:15:31.848 --> 00:15:33.516 Does this scab smell funny to you? 289 00:15:34.351 --> 00:15:36.436 But there's one way for sure to get to the bottom. 290 00:15:36.519 --> 00:15:37.520 Come on! 291 00:15:37.604 --> 00:15:40.023 Run! Yeah! -Yo, get in there for the rebound, dude. 292 00:15:41.024 --> 00:15:42.776 And nobody's risking that. 293 00:15:44.652 --> 00:15:46.071 - 294 00:15:47.447 --> 00:15:49.699 What are you standing around for? 295 00:15:49.783 --> 00:15:51.117 Get the ball! 296 00:15:51.701 --> 00:15:53.119 Ew. It's so gross. - 297 00:15:56.915 --> 00:16:00.669 Hey, what did you get for lunch? - Today I have a jacket. 298 00:16:01.461 --> 00:16:02.837 Looks pretty full up. 299 00:16:03.880 --> 00:16:04.881 Oh, hey. 300 00:16:04.964 --> 00:16:08.927 Try your luck with someone else. Maybe try the table next door. 301 00:16:09.010 --> 00:16:11.012 -Eighth-graders only, newbies. 302 00:16:11.096 --> 00:16:12.639 Should we sit with the girls? 303 00:16:12.722 --> 00:16:14.516 We're out of our league here. 304 00:16:14.599 --> 00:16:15.600 Hey! Over there. 305 00:16:17.143 --> 00:16:18.395 -Take a hike. -Hey. 306 00:16:18.478 --> 00:16:20.814 Band members only. - Not today, guys. 307 00:16:21.564 --> 00:16:22.816 Over there. Let's go! 308 00:16:22.899 --> 00:16:24.984 Yeah? Check back when we're not so busy. 309 00:16:29.155 --> 00:16:30.323 Uh… 310 00:16:31.449 --> 00:16:33.451 There's two! 311 00:16:34.661 --> 00:16:36.621 - 312 00:16:36.705 --> 00:16:38.164 And another thing. 313 00:16:38.248 --> 00:16:41.042 Don't use the bathroom on the second floor. 314 00:16:41.126 --> 00:16:43.670 That was a big mistake. 315 00:16:43.753 --> 00:16:46.506 Yeah, I probably should have warned you about that. 316 00:16:49.384 --> 00:16:52.429 I can't deal with this. I need to be sitting at a table. 317 00:16:52.512 --> 00:16:55.348 But you said only popular kids get seats at the table. 318 00:16:55.432 --> 00:16:58.476 Well, I heard Charlie Davies is getting braces next week, 319 00:16:58.560 --> 00:17:00.395 so he'll definitely drop a few spots for sure. 320 00:17:00.478 --> 00:17:02.981 But that's only one spot. We need two. 321 00:17:05.525 --> 00:17:09.654 That's all the time we get? I didn't even get to finish my juice box. 322 00:17:09.738 --> 00:17:11.906 We gotta go to fifth period, Rowley. 323 00:17:11.990 --> 00:17:14.325 I'll meet you back here at the door after school. 324 00:17:14.409 --> 00:17:16.703 But I don't want to go back out there. 325 00:17:16.786 --> 00:17:19.122 Keep a low profile and you'll be fine. 326 00:17:21.374 --> 00:17:22.876 Think good thoughts, Rowley. 327 00:17:22.959 --> 00:17:26.755 Good thoughts, Rowley. Good thoughts. 328 00:17:27.547 --> 00:17:28.882 Hey, Greg! 329 00:17:28.965 --> 00:17:32.260 After school, wanna come over and play? 330 00:17:32.344 --> 00:17:35.513 Play, play, play, play, play… 331 00:17:43.688 --> 00:17:45.106 Play. 332 00:17:45.190 --> 00:17:46.608 Play. 333 00:17:46.691 --> 00:17:48.943 -Play. - Play. 334 00:17:52.781 --> 00:17:55.784 - 335 00:18:04.084 --> 00:18:07.295 -Hey, kid. Wanna come over and play? -Huh? 336 00:18:07.379 --> 00:18:09.255 Um, no, thank you. 337 00:18:09.339 --> 00:18:10.507 Psst! Rowley! 338 00:18:10.590 --> 00:18:14.135 There you are! You said we were gonna meet at the back door. 339 00:18:14.219 --> 00:18:15.845 "Hang out," Rowley. 340 00:18:15.929 --> 00:18:18.765 You say "hang out" in middle school, not "play." 341 00:18:18.848 --> 00:18:20.642 I've told you that a million times. 342 00:18:20.725 --> 00:18:23.561 Oh, yeah. Sorry. 343 00:18:23.645 --> 00:18:25.855 Seriously, you gotta start listening to me, Rowley. 344 00:18:25.939 --> 00:18:27.524 You're gonna get us both killed. 345 00:18:28.108 --> 00:18:32.779 So, do you wanna hang out and "do" video games? 346 00:18:32.862 --> 00:18:33.863 Better. 347 00:18:36.700 --> 00:18:38.993 Thankfully, Rowley did start listening to me. 348 00:18:39.077 --> 00:18:41.246 We made it through the next few weeks alive. 349 00:18:42.372 --> 00:18:45.834 But by the time Halloween rolled around, Rowley started to slip again. 350 00:18:46.918 --> 00:18:49.921 Do you think our teachers will let us wear our costumes to school tomorrow? 351 00:18:50.005 --> 00:18:53.800 No, Rowley. No! Have I not taught you anything? 352 00:18:53.883 --> 00:18:56.302 They had a costume parade in elementary school. 353 00:18:56.386 --> 00:19:00.056 Right, elementary school. We're in middle school now, remember? 354 00:19:00.765 --> 00:19:02.600 Yeah, you keep reminding me. 355 00:19:02.684 --> 00:19:05.145 Listen. The only reason I'm trick-or-treating this year 356 00:19:05.228 --> 00:19:06.271 is for the candy. 357 00:19:06.354 --> 00:19:09.232 And I really don't want anyone knowing we're doing this, okay? 358 00:19:09.315 --> 00:19:12.444 -I guess. -Listen, things are hard enough at school. 359 00:19:12.527 --> 00:19:14.988 I just don't wanna put a target on our backs, you know? 360 00:19:15.697 --> 00:19:16.740 Fine. 361 00:19:16.823 --> 00:19:19.325 So wear something that doesn't attract too much attention. 362 00:19:19.409 --> 00:19:21.953 -Seriously, we have to be invisible. -Got it. 363 00:19:33.173 --> 00:19:35.425 Ooh! Is that our first trick-or-treater? 364 00:19:35.508 --> 00:19:37.594 -Can someone get the door? -I'm on it. 365 00:19:46.186 --> 00:19:48.188 What? Huh? 366 00:19:51.316 --> 00:19:55.487 Rowley, what are you doing? I thought we said we were being invisible? 367 00:19:55.570 --> 00:19:58.531 -My mom made me add safety stuff. -We can deal with costume stuff later. 368 00:19:58.615 --> 00:19:59.616 Bubby. - Greg? 369 00:19:59.699 --> 00:20:00.909 Let's get out of here before-- 370 00:20:00.992 --> 00:20:03.078 You weren't gonna leave without Manny, were you? 371 00:20:03.161 --> 00:20:06.331 -Rowley, you look adorable. -Come on. 372 00:20:06.414 --> 00:20:08.917 -Mom, can't someone else take Manny? 373 00:20:09.000 --> 00:20:13.129 Well, Rodrick's at the high school party, I'm going to be handing out the candy, 374 00:20:13.213 --> 00:20:17.676 and Dad is doing that thing that he does on Halloween. 375 00:20:17.759 --> 00:20:20.887 Okay. Man your stations. Well, I'll man mine. 376 00:20:20.970 --> 00:20:24.140 Just making sure we're not getting toilet-papered this year. 377 00:20:24.683 --> 00:20:27.185 It takes too long to get that off. No, no. It's not happening. 378 00:20:27.268 --> 00:20:29.604 Good thoughts. All positivity. 379 00:20:29.688 --> 00:20:31.564 But Manny will just slow us down. 380 00:20:31.648 --> 00:20:33.900 We're trying to double our territory this year, Mom. 381 00:20:33.983 --> 00:20:36.569 Well, there are only so many houses in our neighborhood. 382 00:20:36.653 --> 00:20:37.821 Wait a minute. 383 00:20:37.904 --> 00:20:41.324 You're not planning to take the shortcut through Snake Road, are you? 384 00:20:41.408 --> 00:20:42.951 -What? No. - 385 00:20:45.078 --> 00:20:46.746 That-- That would be crazy. 386 00:20:46.830 --> 00:20:51.084 Good. Because you would be in big trouble if you did. 387 00:20:51.167 --> 00:20:53.962 -Right, Manny? - 388 00:20:55.630 --> 00:20:58.091 Keep to the sidewalks, and I want you back at 8:00. 389 00:20:58.174 --> 00:20:59.259 It's a school night. 390 00:20:59.342 --> 00:21:01.219 8:00? 8:00 a.m.? 391 00:21:01.302 --> 00:21:03.638 All right. I-- I mean, I'm fine with that. 392 00:21:03.722 --> 00:21:05.140 - 393 00:21:05.223 --> 00:21:08.143 Fine. 8:30 and not a second later. 394 00:21:08.226 --> 00:21:11.104 Oh, Rowley, you know what? Those glow sticks are a great idea. 395 00:21:11.187 --> 00:21:13.940 Let me see if I have any in the pantry. 396 00:21:14.024 --> 00:21:15.275 Okay, time to go. 397 00:21:15.358 --> 00:21:17.444 -Come on, Manny. You wanna get some candy? - 398 00:21:17.527 --> 00:21:18.820 Arr! 399 00:21:19.654 --> 00:21:21.865 Thank you. - Isn't he in your class? 400 00:21:22.365 --> 00:21:25.076 That's a kiddy costume! -All right! Let's go! 401 00:21:25.160 --> 00:21:26.828 It's the Prince of Preschool. 402 00:21:28.163 --> 00:21:29.581 What a dork. 403 00:21:31.374 --> 00:21:32.375 Trick or treat. 404 00:21:33.626 --> 00:21:35.003 Trick or treat. 405 00:21:35.837 --> 00:21:38.715 -Candy. -Aw. Here, take five. 406 00:21:40.175 --> 00:21:41.176 -Yay! - 407 00:21:41.801 --> 00:21:43.011 Thanks. 408 00:21:43.094 --> 00:21:44.846 Aren't you too old for trick or treat? 409 00:21:51.353 --> 00:21:52.562 What the heck? 410 00:21:55.940 --> 00:21:57.609 Aw. 411 00:21:59.444 --> 00:22:00.570 Bye. 412 00:22:04.449 --> 00:22:06.076 Unbelievable. 413 00:22:10.372 --> 00:22:13.416 Come on, guys. We need to pick up the pace a little. 414 00:22:13.500 --> 00:22:14.709 You guys are killing me. 415 00:22:19.297 --> 00:22:21.966 - 416 00:22:26.596 --> 00:22:27.806 Hi. 417 00:22:28.348 --> 00:22:30.934 Is that a cute little pirate I see? 418 00:22:31.017 --> 00:22:32.018 Mm-hmm. 419 00:22:34.104 --> 00:22:35.063 Aw. 420 00:22:35.146 --> 00:22:37.232 Here's some extra booty for your bucket. 421 00:22:37.315 --> 00:22:38.733 -Biggie! -Seriously? 422 00:22:38.817 --> 00:22:41.903 King-size? It'll take you a week to get through that. 423 00:22:41.986 --> 00:22:43.029 Bubby! 424 00:22:47.492 --> 00:22:48.493 Hmm… 425 00:22:49.661 --> 00:22:51.913 -Do you see what's happening here, Rowley? -Hmm? Aw. 426 00:22:51.996 --> 00:22:53.707 This kid's our golden ticket! - 427 00:22:58.420 --> 00:23:00.422 -Hmm? - 428 00:23:00.505 --> 00:23:02.132 Aw. 429 00:23:02.215 --> 00:23:03.967 There you go. - 430 00:23:04.050 --> 00:23:05.218 Oh, yes! 431 00:23:05.301 --> 00:23:07.178 Yay! 432 00:23:08.930 --> 00:23:10.348 Bubby! Candy! 433 00:23:14.352 --> 00:23:16.563 I can't believe we never thought of bringing Manny. 434 00:23:16.646 --> 00:23:18.857 -This kid's a gold mine. -Yeah. 435 00:23:18.940 --> 00:23:21.526 So we'll stop by my house, empty these bags in my room, 436 00:23:21.609 --> 00:23:23.445 then head back out for another round, okay? 437 00:23:23.528 --> 00:23:27.490 I don't know. I mean, Manny looks tired. 438 00:23:27.574 --> 00:23:29.367 He's fine. Aren't you, Manny? 439 00:23:32.412 --> 00:23:33.621 See? That was a nod. 440 00:23:33.705 --> 00:23:36.541 -Actually, I'm kind of tired too. - 441 00:23:37.125 --> 00:23:40.170 Come on, Rowley. We can stock up on candy for the year! 442 00:23:40.253 --> 00:23:42.255 We can't let this opportunity go to waste. 443 00:23:42.339 --> 00:23:44.132 But we don't need that much candy. 444 00:23:44.215 --> 00:23:47.093 Seriously? You can never have too much candy, Rowley. 445 00:23:47.177 --> 00:23:50.430 Candy's like money in middle school. We can buy someone's lunch seats off them. 446 00:23:51.765 --> 00:23:53.975 How about just like a couple more houses, okay? 447 00:23:55.560 --> 00:23:56.728 It's the end of the night. 448 00:23:56.811 --> 00:23:58.646 Everyone's looking to get rid of their candy. 449 00:23:58.730 --> 00:24:00.940 -We can make a killing. -I don't know. 450 00:24:01.024 --> 00:24:03.902 Okay, here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna hit Whirley Street. 451 00:24:03.985 --> 00:24:06.821 Whirley Street? But that's like a mile from here. 452 00:24:06.905 --> 00:24:09.324 -Not if we take a shortcut. -Snake Road? 453 00:24:09.866 --> 00:24:12.827 -Don't you remember what your mom said? -She'll never even know. 454 00:24:12.911 --> 00:24:16.414 Twenty more minutes and we'll be back at my house eating our candy. I promise. 455 00:24:18.166 --> 00:24:19.751 We're not little kids anymore. 456 00:24:30.178 --> 00:24:31.721 All right. That's my boy. 457 00:24:57.205 --> 00:24:59.207 I-- I think we made a mistake. 458 00:24:59.290 --> 00:25:02.085 It's gonna be worth it, Rowley. Just think about all the candy. 459 00:25:02.168 --> 00:25:04.004 I don't even like candy all that much. 460 00:25:04.087 --> 00:25:07.090 Rowley, do not say that. Don't even joke about it. 461 00:25:07.173 --> 00:25:10.802 Do you think the Goat Man is gonna get us? 462 00:25:10.885 --> 00:25:13.763 Are you kidding me, Rowley? That's obviously a made-up story. 463 00:25:13.847 --> 00:25:17.517 -Rodrick was just trying to scare us. -That's what you said about the cheese. 464 00:25:17.600 --> 00:25:19.352 And that was real. 465 00:25:19.436 --> 00:25:22.063 Yeah, well, a half-man, half-goat? 466 00:25:22.147 --> 00:25:24.274 It's not even physically possible, Rowley. 467 00:25:25.442 --> 00:25:28.445 - 468 00:25:32.949 --> 00:25:33.950 But-- 469 00:25:34.034 --> 00:25:36.494 But if the Goat Man was real, 470 00:25:36.578 --> 00:25:39.622 do you think he's a goat on the top and a person on the bottom? 471 00:25:40.248 --> 00:25:41.791 Or the other way around? 472 00:25:42.459 --> 00:25:44.502 Or do you think he's got a split down the middle 473 00:25:44.586 --> 00:25:47.047 with a goat on the left side and a person on the right? 474 00:25:48.214 --> 00:25:50.967 Can we stop talking about this? I think I hear some-- 475 00:25:51.051 --> 00:25:54.304 - 476 00:25:56.056 --> 00:25:58.308 - 477 00:25:58.391 --> 00:25:59.476 Teenagers! 478 00:26:00.143 --> 00:26:01.978 ♪ Breaking the law, breaking the law ♪ 479 00:26:02.062 --> 00:26:04.230 Whoa! That was close! 480 00:26:04.773 --> 00:26:07.776 Yeah. Um, let's just keep moving before-- 481 00:26:10.987 --> 00:26:12.364 - 482 00:26:16.868 --> 00:26:19.412 ♪ Breaking the law, breaking the law ♪ 483 00:26:20.038 --> 00:26:21.539 ♪ Breaking the law, breaking the law ♪ 484 00:26:22.791 --> 00:26:23.958 ♪ Breaking the law, break-- ♪ 485 00:26:24.042 --> 00:26:25.627 - 486 00:26:25.710 --> 00:26:29.547 Look at these little nerds, out past their bedtimes. 487 00:26:29.631 --> 00:26:33.760 Yeah. Shouldn't you be getting a good night's sleep? 488 00:26:39.307 --> 00:26:42.185 Actually, we're in middle school. My bedtime's not until 9:00. 489 00:26:42.268 --> 00:26:44.604 Mom let me stay up extra tonight. 490 00:26:44.688 --> 00:26:47.565 Yeah, we-- we better head home. Have a good night, fellas. 491 00:26:48.650 --> 00:26:51.528 Ooh! Look at those bags. Is that all candy? 492 00:26:52.070 --> 00:26:55.740 Mostly. But my parents handed out miniature toothbrushes this year, 493 00:26:55.824 --> 00:26:57.409 so we've got those too. 494 00:26:57.492 --> 00:27:00.954 We-- We'd really better get going now. 495 00:27:01.037 --> 00:27:05.083 It would be a real pity if that candy got wet. 496 00:27:12.048 --> 00:27:15.135 - 497 00:27:17.804 --> 00:27:19.139 -What? -Huh? 498 00:27:22.434 --> 00:27:23.643 - 499 00:27:23.727 --> 00:27:25.895 Greg, run! 500 00:27:30.650 --> 00:27:32.277 Let's go! 501 00:27:39.784 --> 00:27:41.369 Hang on to Manny! 502 00:27:49.961 --> 00:27:51.796 Whoa! 503 00:27:55.216 --> 00:27:56.843 -Yeah! - 504 00:28:07.729 --> 00:28:09.647 Yeah, baby! 505 00:28:11.399 --> 00:28:13.151 Not so fast! 506 00:28:14.319 --> 00:28:15.236 Whoo! 507 00:28:18.365 --> 00:28:20.867 - 508 00:28:20.950 --> 00:28:22.994 Whoa! - 509 00:28:34.214 --> 00:28:35.256 Oh, yes! 510 00:28:36.633 --> 00:28:38.802 You'll pay for this! 511 00:28:42.514 --> 00:28:44.766 We know where you go to school! 512 00:28:48.770 --> 00:28:50.021 -Whoa! - 513 00:28:59.739 --> 00:29:00.740 Is this… 514 00:29:01.658 --> 00:29:03.868 My yard! We made it, Rowley. 515 00:29:03.952 --> 00:29:05.453 We're alive! 516 00:29:06.579 --> 00:29:07.622 I told you, Rowley. 517 00:29:07.706 --> 00:29:10.000 If you just stick with me, everything will be fine. 518 00:29:10.083 --> 00:29:12.544 Now let's get inside and enjoy some of this candy. 519 00:29:15.088 --> 00:29:16.715 Ha ha! Oh! 520 00:29:16.798 --> 00:29:19.634 Sorry. I-I thought you were teenagers. 521 00:29:19.718 --> 00:29:20.844 Are you all right? 522 00:29:21.428 --> 00:29:22.554 You're all right. 523 00:29:23.763 --> 00:29:25.432 We were worried sick about you two. 524 00:29:25.515 --> 00:29:26.766 -Mama. -Where were you boys? 525 00:29:28.018 --> 00:29:29.519 Snake Road. 526 00:29:30.687 --> 00:29:31.813 Busted. 527 00:29:31.896 --> 00:29:34.691 Mom grounded me from playing video games for a week, 528 00:29:34.774 --> 00:29:36.151 which is her go-to punishment. 529 00:29:36.234 --> 00:29:39.904 That meant I had to figure out something else to do with my time after school. 530 00:29:39.988 --> 00:29:41.031 Woo-hoo! 531 00:29:42.615 --> 00:29:43.616 Woo-hoo! 532 00:29:50.248 --> 00:29:53.084 I'm thinking I might either run for student council 533 00:29:53.168 --> 00:29:56.671 or maybe sign up for the dance committee. Or maybe I'll try out for the play. 534 00:29:56.755 --> 00:29:59.132 -They're doing Wizard of Oz this year. -Uh-huh. 535 00:29:59.215 --> 00:30:00.925 Chirag Gupta wants to be Toto, 536 00:30:01.009 --> 00:30:04.596 and Patty Farrell says Mrs. Norton already promised her Dorothy. 537 00:30:04.679 --> 00:30:08.683 I'm trying to decide if I wanna try out for the Scarecrow or the Cowardly Lion. 538 00:30:08.767 --> 00:30:11.478 Sounds great, Rowley. Can you go now? 539 00:30:11.561 --> 00:30:13.605 Well, aren't you gonna sign up for anything? 540 00:30:13.688 --> 00:30:17.692 My mom says, "It's important to belong to something when you're in middle school." 541 00:30:17.776 --> 00:30:18.985 Belong to something? 542 00:30:19.069 --> 00:30:22.113 Rowley, I can't even get a seat at lunch, and I'm sick and tired of it. 543 00:30:22.197 --> 00:30:23.406 But if we were in the play, 544 00:30:23.490 --> 00:30:26.576 we could make friends who could invite us to sit at their lunch table. 545 00:30:26.659 --> 00:30:29.704 That's a lot of work, Rowley. And it'll take too much of my time. 546 00:30:29.788 --> 00:30:31.373 I need to change my situation now! 547 00:30:40.590 --> 00:30:42.050 Oh, yeah! 548 00:30:43.468 --> 00:30:45.970 Whoa! 549 00:30:46.054 --> 00:30:47.305 Hey, oh! 550 00:30:47.972 --> 00:30:49.057 Rowley! 551 00:30:50.642 --> 00:30:53.978 You okay? I feel so bad! I really didn't mean to flip you. 552 00:30:55.855 --> 00:30:57.399 I think I hurt my arm. 553 00:30:57.482 --> 00:30:59.984 Yeah, I think I might have pulled something myself. 554 00:31:00.527 --> 00:31:02.821 Can you believe that throw though? I mean-- 555 00:31:04.406 --> 00:31:05.448 Ow. 556 00:31:05.532 --> 00:31:07.158 Oh, man. You're really hurt. 557 00:31:09.202 --> 00:31:10.870 I think I'd better go home. 558 00:31:11.413 --> 00:31:14.374 Okay. But you can't tell your parents how this happened. 559 00:31:14.457 --> 00:31:17.335 If my mom found out we were playing this game, she'd go nuts. 560 00:31:17.419 --> 00:31:20.046 -I'm already grounded. -What am I supposed to tell them then? 561 00:31:20.130 --> 00:31:23.174 Just say you were playing tag and that you tripped on the curb. 562 00:31:23.258 --> 00:31:25.802 But whatever you do, don't mention the Rumble Trike. 563 00:31:29.097 --> 00:31:30.098 Got it? 564 00:31:30.682 --> 00:31:31.683 Got it. 565 00:31:38.148 --> 00:31:41.192 So what happened at the hospital? - They took a bunch of X-rays. 566 00:31:41.276 --> 00:31:43.236 The doctor says my arm is broken. 567 00:31:43.319 --> 00:31:44.404 Broken? 568 00:31:44.487 --> 00:31:47.032 Oh, man. I thought it was just bruised or something. 569 00:31:47.115 --> 00:31:49.909 Nope. I've got a cast and everything. 570 00:31:49.993 --> 00:31:52.120 A cast? That's serious! 571 00:31:52.203 --> 00:31:53.580 Yeah, I know. 572 00:31:53.663 --> 00:31:55.874 I mean, that's really awful and everything. 573 00:31:56.916 --> 00:31:58.626 -But do you know what this means? -Yeah. 574 00:31:58.710 --> 00:32:02.339 I have to put a plastic bag over my arm in the shower for a whole month. 575 00:32:02.422 --> 00:32:05.342 No! What this means for school. 576 00:32:06.259 --> 00:32:10.096 I guess I can't do the wrestling unit in Phys Ed? 577 00:32:10.180 --> 00:32:13.183 Rowley! A cast is the greatest thing that can happen to a kid. 578 00:32:13.266 --> 00:32:15.060 -It is? -Yes, Rowley. 579 00:32:15.143 --> 00:32:18.229 -Everyone's gonna wanna sign it. -What? They will? 580 00:32:18.313 --> 00:32:21.191 Yes. Kids will be begging you to sit at their lunch table. 581 00:32:21.274 --> 00:32:22.275 Yeah. 582 00:32:22.359 --> 00:32:24.861 And I hope you'll remember who your real friends are, Rowley. 583 00:32:24.944 --> 00:32:27.030 The people who helped you get to where you are. 584 00:32:27.113 --> 00:32:28.823 -Yeah. -What about your parents? 585 00:32:28.907 --> 00:32:29.991 Are they suspicious? 586 00:32:30.075 --> 00:32:33.328 I told them I tripped on a rock playing Duck, Duck, Goose, like you said. 587 00:32:33.411 --> 00:32:34.746 Like I said? 588 00:32:34.829 --> 00:32:37.957 We were playing tag, Rowley! And you tripped over the curb. 589 00:32:38.041 --> 00:32:41.586 It doesn't even make sense for two people to play Duck, Duck, Goose. Come on! 590 00:32:41.670 --> 00:32:45.382 -Oh, yeah. Sorry. -We gotta get our story straight, 591 00:32:45.465 --> 00:32:47.384 or they're gonna find out about the Rumble Trike. 592 00:32:47.467 --> 00:32:49.594 Did you say, "Rumble Trike"? 593 00:32:55.600 --> 00:32:57.936 I don't know what to do with you, Greg. 594 00:32:58.019 --> 00:33:00.689 First you disobey me and go to Snake Road. 595 00:33:00.772 --> 00:33:02.774 Then you play that-- that game. 596 00:33:02.857 --> 00:33:05.819 I told you someone was going to get hurt playing that. 597 00:33:05.902 --> 00:33:07.737 I'm sorry, Mom. I just… 598 00:33:10.990 --> 00:33:12.992 Lying to me is bad enough, 599 00:33:13.076 --> 00:33:17.539 but telling Rowley to lie to his parents is just-- just-- 600 00:33:20.333 --> 00:33:21.543 Mom, I know I messed up. 601 00:33:22.585 --> 00:33:24.921 You can take away my video games for the month. 602 00:33:25.005 --> 00:33:26.631 The year if it makes you feel better. 603 00:33:26.715 --> 00:33:29.884 Punishing you doesn't make me feel better, Greg. 604 00:33:29.968 --> 00:33:31.761 I'm trying to raise a good kid. 605 00:33:31.845 --> 00:33:33.513 I do wanna be good, Mom. 606 00:33:34.639 --> 00:33:36.224 Well, then here's what you need to do. 607 00:33:36.307 --> 00:33:40.061 You need to figure out a way to make things right by Rowley. 608 00:33:41.104 --> 00:33:42.522 You owe that to him. 609 00:33:43.273 --> 00:33:45.608 That boy is such a good friend to you. 610 00:33:46.484 --> 00:33:47.485 Yeah, Mom. 611 00:33:48.361 --> 00:33:50.488 I can't tell you how to make things right. 612 00:33:51.322 --> 00:33:52.699 That part is up to you. 613 00:33:56.244 --> 00:33:59.914 -But Mom… -Listen to that inner voice, Greg. 614 00:34:01.041 --> 00:34:02.375 I know it's in there. 615 00:34:03.126 --> 00:34:04.377 Do the right thing. 616 00:34:10.175 --> 00:34:12.844 Okay, I know what my mom wanted me to do. 617 00:34:12.927 --> 00:34:15.930 She wanted me to tell Rowley's parents the truth about what happened. 618 00:34:16.973 --> 00:34:20.643 But here's the thing. Rowley's dad has never really liked me. 619 00:34:20.727 --> 00:34:23.063 I knew if I told him what really happened, 620 00:34:23.146 --> 00:34:25.607 it was just gonna make him like me even less. 621 00:34:25.690 --> 00:34:27.317 That wouldn't make things any better. 622 00:34:28.026 --> 00:34:29.903 I don't wanna get Rowley in trouble for lying, 623 00:34:29.986 --> 00:34:31.780 'cause then he'd be in trouble too. 624 00:34:31.863 --> 00:34:36.618 So, I decided the right thing to do was to just let things be. 625 00:34:40.872 --> 00:34:43.750 Because telling the truth would make things worse for everybody. 626 00:34:54.886 --> 00:34:56.971 -Ooh. -Oh, my gosh. What happened? 627 00:34:57.055 --> 00:34:59.265 -It looks so cool. -Oh, you're so great. 628 00:35:00.183 --> 00:35:01.184 Can I sign it? 629 00:35:01.267 --> 00:35:03.812 And I'll tell you another thing that I was right about. 630 00:35:05.438 --> 00:35:08.775 That cast. In fact, it worked even better than I thought it would. 631 00:35:11.069 --> 00:35:12.320 It's so cool. 632 00:35:14.656 --> 00:35:17.909 Just like I predicted, getting a seat at lunch was no problem at all. 633 00:35:24.958 --> 00:35:26.835 Well, at least for Rowley it wasn't a problem. 634 00:35:26.918 --> 00:35:29.379 Here comes the airplane. 635 00:35:29.462 --> 00:35:32.882 - 636 00:35:32.966 --> 00:35:35.677 -Nom! -Here comes the train! 637 00:35:35.760 --> 00:35:39.556 Chugga chugga chugga, choo choo! 638 00:35:41.891 --> 00:35:43.643 He can feed himself just fine, okay? 639 00:35:43.727 --> 00:35:45.228 Mmm. 640 00:35:45.311 --> 00:35:47.022 You know Rowley's left-handed? 641 00:35:47.105 --> 00:35:48.356 Who are you? 642 00:35:48.440 --> 00:35:51.234 I'm Greg Heffley, Rowley's best friend. 643 00:35:51.317 --> 00:35:52.819 I'm the one who broke his arm. 644 00:35:53.987 --> 00:35:55.030 You jerk! 645 00:35:55.113 --> 00:35:56.364 Get out of here. - Heads up! 646 00:36:00.410 --> 00:36:02.328 I couldn't have Rowley hog all the attention, 647 00:36:02.412 --> 00:36:04.581 so I decided to whip up an injury of my own. 648 00:36:15.592 --> 00:36:19.054 It's just an infection caused by a splinter that was left untreated. 649 00:36:23.224 --> 00:36:24.434 -Hey. - 650 00:36:24.517 --> 00:36:26.770 Can I peek at your infection? 651 00:36:26.853 --> 00:36:27.979 Ew. 652 00:36:29.105 --> 00:36:31.858 I realized I couldn't compete with Rowley's stupid injury. 653 00:36:34.152 --> 00:36:36.196 So that meant I needed to find something of my own. 654 00:36:36.279 --> 00:36:38.323 And just like that, I did. 655 00:36:51.961 --> 00:36:54.255 Hey, Greg. I couldn't find you after school. 656 00:36:54.339 --> 00:36:55.340 Huh? 657 00:36:55.423 --> 00:36:57.842 Sorry. I wanted to go home and start working on my comics. 658 00:36:57.926 --> 00:37:00.136 Your comics? For what? 659 00:37:00.220 --> 00:37:01.388 The school paper. 660 00:37:01.471 --> 00:37:04.099 One of the cartoonists quit, so now there's a spot open. 661 00:37:07.769 --> 00:37:08.895 Can I help? 662 00:37:08.978 --> 00:37:11.106 Sorry, Rowley. There's only one spot open. 663 00:37:16.444 --> 00:37:18.071 Zoo-Wee Mama! 664 00:37:19.489 --> 00:37:21.074 This is funny! 665 00:37:22.409 --> 00:37:24.744 "Oops. I've stepped in a puddle! 666 00:37:25.245 --> 00:37:28.248 Well, at least it's not an acid puddle! 667 00:37:28.873 --> 00:37:33.086 Ah! It is an acid puddle! 668 00:37:33.169 --> 00:37:35.005 Zoo-Wee Mama!" 669 00:37:35.088 --> 00:37:38.717 Zoo-Wee Mama! Do you have any more like this one? 670 00:37:38.800 --> 00:37:40.427 I'm working on something better. 671 00:37:40.510 --> 00:37:43.179 Check this one out. It's called "Creighton the Cretin." 672 00:37:43.263 --> 00:37:47.642 "Hiya, doc! Can I get a new butt? My old one has a crack in it." 673 00:37:47.726 --> 00:37:50.437 "Everyone's butt has a crack in it, you idiot!" 674 00:37:50.520 --> 00:37:51.521 "Oops." 675 00:37:52.480 --> 00:37:54.399 But when does he say, "Zoo-Wee Mama"? 676 00:37:54.482 --> 00:37:55.692 He doesn't. 677 00:37:55.775 --> 00:37:59.738 I think it'd be funnier if he said, "Zoo-Wee Mama!" 678 00:38:02.782 --> 00:38:06.036 You know what? If you wanna draw your own comic, be my guest. 679 00:38:06.119 --> 00:38:08.371 But we always do everything together. 680 00:38:09.080 --> 00:38:11.416 Yeah, well, not this time. Sorry. 681 00:38:12.542 --> 00:38:14.753 But can we be partners? 682 00:38:14.836 --> 00:38:16.838 You can write the comic, and I can draw it. 683 00:38:17.589 --> 00:38:20.175 No offense, Rowley, but you don't even draw noses on people. 684 00:38:20.258 --> 00:38:24.304 Sorry. This is kinda my thing, like the way Joshie's your thing. 685 00:38:24.387 --> 00:38:28.308 Okay. Well, I guess I'll go work on my comic at my house. 686 00:38:29.142 --> 00:38:30.185 Sounds good. 687 00:38:38.651 --> 00:38:39.736 See ya. 688 00:38:43.782 --> 00:38:47.077 - 689 00:38:47.160 --> 00:38:50.497 After I turned in my comic, all I could do was wait. 690 00:38:51.289 --> 00:38:53.583 But after a whole week went by, 691 00:38:54.709 --> 00:38:56.628 Mr. Humphreys made an announcement. 692 00:38:56.711 --> 00:38:59.422 Attention, students. After careful consideration, 693 00:38:59.506 --> 00:39:02.634 we've made a decision on the cartoonist for the school paper. 694 00:39:02.717 --> 00:39:04.469 And the new cartoonist is… 695 00:39:05.178 --> 00:39:08.014 -Greg Heffley. -Yes! Yes! 696 00:39:10.725 --> 00:39:13.478 This is possibly the biggest thing that has ever happened to me. 697 00:39:14.729 --> 00:39:17.148 -That's the dude? -He wrote that? 698 00:39:18.400 --> 00:39:19.818 Is that cartoon kid? 699 00:39:22.779 --> 00:39:24.948 For the first time since I stepped through those double doors, 700 00:39:25.031 --> 00:39:26.700 I wasn't invisible. 701 00:39:26.783 --> 00:39:28.284 -Teacher's pet! 702 00:39:28.368 --> 00:39:30.286 Aren't comics supposed to make you laugh? 703 00:39:30.370 --> 00:39:31.579 "Creighton the Curious Student." 704 00:39:31.663 --> 00:39:33.248 Did you think that was funny? -What the-- 705 00:39:33.331 --> 00:39:38.336 "Teacher, if x plus 43 is 89, what would x be?" 706 00:39:38.420 --> 00:39:40.046 "Why, it would be 46!" 707 00:39:40.130 --> 00:39:43.299 "Thanks! Kids, if you'd like to learn more about math, 708 00:39:43.383 --> 00:39:45.677 have Mr. Humphreys show you around 709 00:39:45.760 --> 00:39:49.139 the newly expanded math and science section of the library." 710 00:39:49.222 --> 00:39:53.309 "And thanks to the Parent-Teacher Organization for funding the new section. 711 00:39:53.393 --> 00:39:55.729 Our old books were badly outdated." 712 00:39:55.812 --> 00:39:57.230 They changed it? 713 00:39:57.313 --> 00:39:59.899 -Teacher's pet! -Thanks for ruining my day. 714 00:39:59.983 --> 00:40:01.735 -What a waste of ink. -Nerd! 715 00:40:04.904 --> 00:40:06.865 Boo! 716 00:40:06.948 --> 00:40:07.949 Teacher's pet! 717 00:40:08.033 --> 00:40:09.409 See? That's what happens 718 00:40:09.492 --> 00:40:11.953 when the school librarian is in charge of the newspaper. 719 00:40:12.037 --> 00:40:14.080 They've always gotta get pushy with their books. 720 00:40:16.041 --> 00:40:17.542 One week after I quit, 721 00:40:17.625 --> 00:40:21.171 Mr. Humphreys chose someone to replace me, and you'll never believe who he picked. 722 00:40:21.254 --> 00:40:23.131 Zoo-Wee Mama! - 723 00:40:26.426 --> 00:40:27.886 Zoo-Wee Mama! 724 00:40:32.390 --> 00:40:35.977 Zoo-Wee Mama! -Zoo-Wee Mama! 725 00:40:37.145 --> 00:40:39.356 Zoo-Wee Mama! 726 00:40:41.858 --> 00:40:43.568 Zoo-Wee Mama! 727 00:40:47.155 --> 00:40:50.200 "Hey, pretty lady. Do you wanna go on a date?" 728 00:40:50.283 --> 00:40:53.411 "I'm actually not a lady. I'm one of those dogs with long hair. 729 00:40:53.495 --> 00:40:55.330 So, no thanks to that date." 730 00:40:55.413 --> 00:40:57.207 "Zoo-Wee Mama!" 731 00:40:57.290 --> 00:41:01.878 So a kid who can barely draw got his comic in the school paper? 732 00:41:01.961 --> 00:41:05.298 It's totally unfair. Why didn't they censor Rowley's work? 733 00:41:13.598 --> 00:41:15.183 You stole my comic. 734 00:41:15.266 --> 00:41:17.310 You said you didn't wanna do it anymore. 735 00:41:17.394 --> 00:41:20.146 Well, couldn't you come up with something original for once, Rowley? 736 00:41:20.230 --> 00:41:22.732 Well, I can't help it if I'm just naturally funny. 737 00:41:22.816 --> 00:41:24.359 Zoo-Wee Mama! 738 00:41:24.442 --> 00:41:25.777 Zoo-Wee Mama! 739 00:41:25.860 --> 00:41:29.114 -Zoo-Wee Mama! - Zoo-Wee Mama! 740 00:41:31.866 --> 00:41:35.745 You know what? I hope you enjoy all this, because I'm tired of carrying you. 741 00:41:35.829 --> 00:41:37.747 Maybe it's the other way around. 742 00:41:37.831 --> 00:41:40.917 This comic, this lunch table, that cast. 743 00:41:41.001 --> 00:41:43.378 You wouldn't have any of it if it wasn't for me! 744 00:41:43.461 --> 00:41:45.547 Yeah, because you broke my arm. 745 00:41:45.630 --> 00:41:46.840 Yeah. You're welcome. 746 00:41:54.180 --> 00:41:57.100 Rowley deserves your respect. - 747 00:41:58.560 --> 00:42:00.895 -Zoo-Wee Mama! - Oh! 748 00:42:02.063 --> 00:42:03.815 Okay, I'll admit. 749 00:42:03.898 --> 00:42:06.609 Maybe I could have handled the situation at lunch a little better. 750 00:42:06.693 --> 00:42:08.028 But I figured, after a while, 751 00:42:08.111 --> 00:42:10.447 me and Rowley would cool down, things would go back to normal. 752 00:42:10.530 --> 00:42:12.574 So do you like DinoBlasters? 753 00:42:12.657 --> 00:42:13.658 No. 754 00:42:14.200 --> 00:42:15.618 I love it. 755 00:42:20.123 --> 00:42:22.167 Thing is, that hasn't happened yet. 756 00:42:28.882 --> 00:42:31.968 Rowley's been hanging out with this kid Chirag every day. 757 00:42:32.052 --> 00:42:34.721 You know the only reason he's doing it is to make me jealous. 758 00:42:36.639 --> 00:42:38.933 But two can play at that game. 759 00:42:43.188 --> 00:42:45.190 -You wanna see my room? -Yeah. 760 00:43:06.795 --> 00:43:07.796 Yes! Come on! 761 00:43:24.187 --> 00:43:28.817 The one and only Greg Heffley is on my front step. 762 00:43:30.860 --> 00:43:32.987 Yeah, I guess I am. 763 00:43:33.947 --> 00:43:36.825 So I was thinking, me and you are neighbors. 764 00:43:36.908 --> 00:43:37.909 Yeah. Uh-huh. 765 00:43:37.992 --> 00:43:40.745 But we barely even know each other. 766 00:43:40.829 --> 00:43:42.330 How'd you feel about a sleepover? 767 00:43:42.414 --> 00:43:43.415 Tonight? 768 00:43:43.998 --> 00:43:46.835 Yeah. Right now. You and me. Just a couple of pals. 769 00:43:46.918 --> 00:43:48.753 Woo-hoo! Come on in. 770 00:44:04.102 --> 00:44:06.354 - 771 00:44:09.441 --> 00:44:12.152 You know, maybe we should take this one step at a time. 772 00:44:12.235 --> 00:44:15.947 How about if we just play a quick game of cards and call it a night? 773 00:44:19.159 --> 00:44:20.577 - 774 00:44:20.660 --> 00:44:23.163 Hey, Greg. 775 00:44:28.585 --> 00:44:29.794 - 776 00:44:29.878 --> 00:44:32.881 Oh, Fregley. Do you have a playmate over? 777 00:44:32.964 --> 00:44:35.675 Would you like for me to knit him some socks? 778 00:44:35.759 --> 00:44:38.303 Yep. I'm pretty sure I'm gonna be in therapy over this. 779 00:44:40.221 --> 00:44:41.598 Whoo! 780 00:44:41.681 --> 00:44:43.725 Greg Heffley's in my room. 781 00:44:44.642 --> 00:44:45.685 Woo-hoo! 782 00:44:46.311 --> 00:44:48.396 Yeah, but just for a short visit. 783 00:44:48.480 --> 00:44:50.023 In fact, I really need to be-- 784 00:44:50.106 --> 00:44:51.608 You wanna play make-believe? 785 00:44:52.150 --> 00:44:55.862 You can be the church organist, and I'll be the school hygienist. 786 00:44:58.114 --> 00:45:00.950 You know, that's tempting. But I'm not really into-- 787 00:45:01.034 --> 00:45:03.411 How about a tickle fight? 788 00:45:03.912 --> 00:45:06.081 Tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle. 789 00:45:06.164 --> 00:45:08.208 I'm gonna tickle, tickle. 790 00:45:08.291 --> 00:45:10.293 I got you. I'm tickling you. Ha ha! 791 00:45:12.087 --> 00:45:14.047 Hey! What are you doing? 792 00:45:14.130 --> 00:45:15.465 Give me some space here. 793 00:45:15.548 --> 00:45:17.092 Can't you just stay over there? 794 00:45:17.175 --> 00:45:20.178 Well, what do you wanna do then? 795 00:45:22.722 --> 00:45:24.432 I don't know. I thought if we… 796 00:45:26.559 --> 00:45:29.020 Mmm. 797 00:45:29.104 --> 00:45:32.565 Fregley! That's the only candy bar I had that wasn't wet. 798 00:45:32.649 --> 00:45:34.859 Mom never lets me have chocolate. 799 00:45:34.943 --> 00:45:39.447 Says it makes me hyperactive and unstable. 800 00:45:42.659 --> 00:45:46.204 -Fregley, are you okay? Fregley! - 801 00:45:46.287 --> 00:45:48.331 I've blocked out big parts of that night. 802 00:45:48.915 --> 00:45:51.376 Hey, Greg. 803 00:45:51.960 --> 00:45:54.796 I'm so glad I can't remember every little thing that happened. 804 00:45:58.883 --> 00:45:59.926 -Hey! 805 00:46:00.510 --> 00:46:02.595 But what I do remember 806 00:46:03.096 --> 00:46:05.306 is that I ended up locked up in Fregley's bathroom 807 00:46:05.390 --> 00:46:07.684 while I waited for his sugar high to wear off. 808 00:46:16.818 --> 00:46:18.361 Dear Gregory, 809 00:46:18.445 --> 00:46:21.906 I'm sorry I ate your candy and chased you with a booger. 810 00:46:21.990 --> 00:46:25.535 Here, I put it on this piece of paper so you can get me back. 811 00:46:25.618 --> 00:46:27.579 Signed, Fregley. 812 00:46:28.830 --> 00:46:30.165 What the-- 813 00:46:31.833 --> 00:46:34.210 But if I could, I would forget everything. 814 00:47:09.496 --> 00:47:11.498 - 815 00:47:16.461 --> 00:47:18.505 Hey, Greg. Hey! 816 00:47:18.588 --> 00:47:20.215 Oh, hey. Hey, Rowley. What's up? 817 00:47:20.298 --> 00:47:22.217 I was wondering if I could stop by your house today 818 00:47:22.300 --> 00:47:24.094 and pick up my copy of Twisted Wizard. 819 00:47:24.177 --> 00:47:25.762 Me and Chirag want to play it. 820 00:47:27.055 --> 00:47:30.266 Yeah, well, I've had it for a while, so it's kind of mine now. 821 00:47:30.350 --> 00:47:32.894 I guess you and your new friend will have to find something else to do. 822 00:47:32.977 --> 00:47:36.189 Oh, yeah? Well, I'm not the only one with a new friend. 823 00:47:36.272 --> 00:47:37.399 You mean Fregley? 824 00:47:37.482 --> 00:47:39.484 I'm permanently scarred from that night. 825 00:47:39.567 --> 00:47:41.611 And it's all your fault for ditching me. 826 00:47:41.695 --> 00:47:44.155 I ditched you? More like the other way around. 827 00:47:44.239 --> 00:47:47.450 You haven't been the same ever since you got that stupid cast. 828 00:47:47.534 --> 00:47:48.702 -You've changed. -Fight! 829 00:47:48.785 --> 00:47:50.495 -Oh, yeah? - They're gonna fight. 830 00:47:50.578 --> 00:47:52.706 Well, you're the one who broke my arm. 831 00:47:52.789 --> 00:47:54.624 You can take him. Knock him down! 832 00:47:55.375 --> 00:47:57.627 Guys, come over. Come check out the fight. 833 00:47:58.962 --> 00:48:01.881 Why don't you make a move? - Unless you're chicken. 834 00:48:01.965 --> 00:48:04.509 Fight, fight, fight! 835 00:48:04.592 --> 00:48:08.054 Fight, fight, fight, fight! 836 00:48:08.638 --> 00:48:10.807 Where'd you learn to fight? Ballerina school? 837 00:48:10.890 --> 00:48:13.351 If you don't do something, I'm gonna fall asleep. 838 00:48:13.435 --> 00:48:15.937 Who taught you how to fight? Your granny? 839 00:48:16.021 --> 00:48:18.857 Are you two gonna fight or keep dancing with each other? 840 00:48:19.649 --> 00:48:21.568 Do they even know how to do this? 841 00:48:23.445 --> 00:48:24.946 - 842 00:48:25.030 --> 00:48:27.365 -Let's get out of here! -Come on. Let's go! 843 00:48:31.745 --> 00:48:34.581 Well, look who it is. 844 00:48:34.664 --> 00:48:36.958 Our little friends from Halloween. 845 00:48:38.084 --> 00:48:39.878 We told you we'd find you. 846 00:48:39.961 --> 00:48:42.922 And now you're gonna pay for busting my tire. 847 00:48:44.591 --> 00:48:47.927 But, like, how are they gonna pay? 848 00:48:48.011 --> 00:48:50.347 Yeah. Do you mean, like, with money? 849 00:48:50.430 --> 00:48:52.390 'Cause not everybody carries cash these days. 850 00:48:52.474 --> 00:48:53.892 No, you morons. 851 00:48:53.975 --> 00:48:57.228 Pay, as in, like, revenge. 852 00:48:58.563 --> 00:49:02.359 Okay. Now we're all on the same page. 853 00:49:04.819 --> 00:49:08.031 Okay. Now what? 854 00:49:08.114 --> 00:49:09.991 I am thinking. 855 00:49:10.075 --> 00:49:11.076 Ooh! Ooh! 856 00:49:11.159 --> 00:49:13.370 -You still got that fire extinguisher? - 857 00:49:13.453 --> 00:49:20.001 Nah. My mom made me put it back in the house for "fires." 858 00:49:24.964 --> 00:49:26.841 What's this one looking at? 859 00:49:26.925 --> 00:49:29.177 Uh, it looks like… 860 00:49:30.345 --> 00:49:31.638 Cheese! 861 00:49:31.721 --> 00:49:35.475 - 862 00:49:35.558 --> 00:49:37.519 Now, I really can't say what happened next. 863 00:49:37.602 --> 00:49:40.313 Because if Rowley ever tries to run for president when he grows up 864 00:49:40.397 --> 00:49:42.607 and people find out what those teenagers made him do, 865 00:49:42.691 --> 00:49:44.234 he won't have a chance. 866 00:49:46.486 --> 00:49:47.821 So all I'm gonna say 867 00:49:47.904 --> 00:49:50.031 is that the teenagers made Rowley 868 00:49:50.115 --> 00:49:53.660 -blank, blank, blank the cheese. - 869 00:49:58.331 --> 00:50:00.625 Okay. You're next. 870 00:50:00.709 --> 00:50:04.754 No. But I just had lunch. I'm not even really that hungry. 871 00:50:04.838 --> 00:50:06.423 You're not getting out of this. 872 00:50:06.506 --> 00:50:09.050 But, um, I'm lactose intolerant. 873 00:50:10.301 --> 00:50:12.137 It'll make me gassy. 874 00:50:29.988 --> 00:50:33.033 -Huh? 875 00:50:33.116 --> 00:50:34.659 Get out of here, you punks! 876 00:50:41.750 --> 00:50:42.751 You boys okay? 877 00:50:46.921 --> 00:50:48.882 What happened? -They're gone. 878 00:50:48.965 --> 00:50:51.259 -What's going on? -What's going on over here? 879 00:50:51.343 --> 00:50:52.844 The cheese! 880 00:50:52.927 --> 00:50:54.804 Look! There's-- 881 00:50:54.888 --> 00:50:56.723 There's a piece missing! 882 00:50:56.806 --> 00:50:58.475 What? - What? 883 00:51:01.811 --> 00:51:03.521 -Disgusting! - Ew! 884 00:51:04.230 --> 00:51:07.484 Trust me, I was tempted to tell everyone the truth about what happened, 885 00:51:07.567 --> 00:51:10.028 but then I heard that annoying inner voice. 886 00:51:10.612 --> 00:51:12.697 Do the right thing, Greg. 887 00:51:12.781 --> 00:51:15.492 That's all you need to get by in this world, you know? 888 00:51:15.575 --> 00:51:17.035 One good friend. 889 00:51:17.118 --> 00:51:18.661 Somebody has the Cheese Touch. 890 00:51:18.745 --> 00:51:20.997 Rowley Jefferson ate the-- 891 00:51:21.081 --> 00:51:22.207 No! 892 00:51:22.290 --> 00:51:26.211 It was me! Those teenagers dared me to do it, and I did it! 893 00:51:26.294 --> 00:51:28.046 So what? No big deal. 894 00:51:28.129 --> 00:51:32.884 -Greg Heffley has the Cheese Touch! - 895 00:51:32.967 --> 00:51:35.804 He has the Cheese Touch. - Oh, ew! 896 00:51:37.389 --> 00:51:38.723 The Cheese Touch! 897 00:51:41.434 --> 00:51:44.354 Okay, so I might have bent the truth a little, 898 00:51:44.437 --> 00:51:47.982 but sometimes you have to do that sort of thing to help a friend. 899 00:51:48.733 --> 00:51:49.734 So, uh… 900 00:51:50.276 --> 00:51:52.529 you, uh, wanna go to my place 901 00:51:52.612 --> 00:51:55.907 and, I don't know, play some Twisted Wizard? 902 00:51:55.990 --> 00:51:58.243 Yeah. That'd be good. 903 00:52:05.083 --> 00:52:07.961 Oh, man. I totally would've had you. 904 00:52:08.044 --> 00:52:11.297 Are you kidding? You were totally about to start crying. 905 00:52:11.381 --> 00:52:13.299 I had something in my eye. 906 00:52:13.967 --> 00:52:16.094 I could've taken you with my eyes closed. 907 00:52:16.177 --> 00:52:18.471 I could've beaten you with my little pinkie. 908 00:52:20.265 --> 00:52:22.976 Having the Cheese Touch hasn't been as bad as I thought. 909 00:52:23.059 --> 00:52:24.060 Cheese Touch! 910 00:52:26.771 --> 00:52:29.065 The kids at school give me plenty of space. 911 00:52:30.150 --> 00:52:31.901 And it's not just in the hallways. 912 00:52:32.902 --> 00:52:35.155 I've pretty much got the run of the place. 913 00:52:38.241 --> 00:52:39.534 And the best part is, 914 00:52:39.617 --> 00:52:42.871 getting a seat at lunch is not a problem anymore. 915 00:52:44.622 --> 00:52:45.623 -Run! - 916 00:52:45.707 --> 00:52:48.710 In fact, I've got a whole table to myself. 917 00:52:55.258 --> 00:52:58.386 Well, maybe not entirely to myself, but I'm fine with it. 918 00:53:00.221 --> 00:53:02.349 And things are good with me and Rowley. 919 00:53:02.432 --> 00:53:04.184 In fact, they're better than good. 920 00:53:08.355 --> 00:53:10.357 But if Rowley ever steps out of line, 921 00:53:10.440 --> 00:53:13.401 I'll let everyone know who really ate the you-know-what. 922 00:53:16.154 --> 00:53:18.239 Come on. Almost there. 923 00:53:18.323 --> 00:53:19.741 - 924 00:53:19.824 --> 00:53:21.326 -I got you. - 925 00:53:21.409 --> 00:53:25.080 -Eat my dust! Get out of my way! -Oh, you got lucky that time. 926 00:53:25.163 --> 00:53:26.539 How are you this bad? 927 00:53:26.623 --> 00:53:28.333 -Oh! -Best of three!