WEBVTT FILE

1
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They said he was out
the door in two weeks.

2
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Then I hear the guy's
re-upped for five years.

3
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The label hated it.

4
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This castle belongs to
the Duke of Gloucester.

5
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So I realize that was the guy who kept
angrily staring at me the whole time.

6
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Hey, Kevin. Hey, Lorne.

7
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- You ready for this?
- Yeah, what's that?

8
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Oh, oh! We're gonna do the thing.
Okay.

9
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All right, you want to start it off?

10
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- Talk to you, or talk to the lens?
- Either way.

11
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So, Sandy Wexler...

12
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Where do I begin?

13
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He may be the most
unique guy I ever met.

14
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If you were working in Los Angeles
in the '90s, any time in there,

15
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you'd run into Sandy Wexler
at some point.

16
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Sandy was one of those
fringe Hollywood managers

17
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that you always sort of saw around.

18
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You know, you'd see him at a wrap party,
and he'd be laughing, stuffing his face.

19
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You'd think,
"No one even invited this guy."

20
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Sandy said I could be
the next Patrick Swayze.

21
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Only thing he ever said to me
that made sense.

22
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Sandy was not a big shot.
He was a... He was a tiny shot.

23
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But anybody who met him,
you never forgot him.

24
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You know, you gotta remember there
was no YouTube, there was no Vines.

25
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And none of that...
None of the social media platforms.

26
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You really needed a guy
like Sandy to be seen.

27
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Not Sandy.
Not Sandy, but a guy like Sandy.

28
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Hey, Arsenio!
Nice to see you again, kiddo.

29
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Have I seen you before?

30
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Yeah, it's Sandy Wexler.

31
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I met you at Bernie's beach house,
with Doug and Danny.

32
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You guys were playing hangman.

33
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You were hysterical that night. No one
could figure out the word "canoe."

34
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I have no idea
what you're talking about, man.

35
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How you doing with your manager, kid?
Are you still fighting?

36
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I don't have a manager, man.

37
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Well, you do now. If you want one.

38
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No, I'm good. I... I have an agent.

39
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- Oh.
- As a matter of fact, I have six agents.

40
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Got plenty of white people in my life.

41
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- All right.
- I'm good, dawg.

42
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An agent is business.
A manager is family.

43
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He guides you. He advises you.
He fights the good fights.

44
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Makes the tough phone calls.

45
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Truth is, I'm not happy unless...
unless you're happy.

46
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So what do you say, Arsenio?
You wanna get happy together?

47
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Continued success, Arsenio!

48
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Okay? Oh!

49
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I got a hit on the hip, and it's Sinbad.

50
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I don't think any of those people
were really beeping him.

51
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'Cause he would just go, like,
"Oh, jeez, Mackenzie Phillips."

52
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The one thing about Sandy is,

53
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- he just never stopped lying.
- Always.

54
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Managers get used to lying,
but Sandy took it to an art form.

55
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Where am I? I'm in Joel Silver's office
right now, talking about you.

56
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If you land on your feet...

57
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Hey, buddy, how long are you gonna be?

58
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Excuse me, I am talking
to Lew Wasserman's neighbor right now.

59
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That was Janet Maslin from the Times.

60
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Sandy's personal life?

61
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- I know nothing. I know nothing.
- Did he have a personal life?

62
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- He wasn't married.
- Didn't date.

63
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It was sad. Seemed like he
didn't have any friends, right?

64
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He had no friends.

65
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Any good?

66
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No, no, no, no, no, no.

67
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That's great.

68
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But he was the king of the fake laugh

69
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- and the applauding combo. Yeah.
- Combo. Yeah.

70
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Next time he'll get his own ketchup.

71
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You gotta go.

72
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Is Mary Jo Slater
the casting agent on this?

73
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- No. I don't know.
- Good job, guys.

74
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I was in Nam.
But, you know, I was there in 1984,

75
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so it was... It was a different vibe.

76
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And then all I hear in the back is...

77
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- He would fake laugh at funny comics.
- That melon.

78
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It was like, "Why are you fake laughing?

79
00:04:33.899 --> 00:04:35.567
- It's Eddie Murphy. He's funny."
- Right!

80
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When it came to eating
with Sandy, he, um...

81
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It was like a smorgasbord on his face.

82
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I mean, he was on the Atkins diet, right?
So he always had, like, chicken...

83
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- Kielbasa.
- T-bone steak.

84
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- Brisket.
- Beef jerky.

85
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I never actually ate with Sandy,
but I did hear it was kind of gross.

86
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Can you close your mouth
just a little bit?

87
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What did I do?

88
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He dressed like your grandfather,

89
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he had the table manners of a horse,
but he was a great manager.

90
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He really cared about his clients.

91
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He made them his family.
He was with them all the time.

92
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And, uh, I wasn't sure
what he was doing for them,

93
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but you could feel the love.

94
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I spoke to Chili's. I think I can
get us the corner table there

95
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and preorder the appetizers.

96
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I don't give a shit
about Chili's right now.

97
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I thought you wanted to go to Chili's.

98
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- No, I never said that.
- You said that.

99
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That's okay.

100
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You're nervous.
I can see that you're sweating.

101
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- I'm scared, Sandy.
- Yeah.

102
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I gotta jump over ten trailers
and land on a waterbed.

103
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Why are you laughing?

104
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Because you're funny.
You make me laugh.

105
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- Well, I'm not trying to be funny.
- No, it's the way you said it.

106
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The way I said...
What are you...

107
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Look at the size of this crowd.

108
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You said they'd come, and they came.

109
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Ladies and gentlemen
of El Segundo Motor Home Court,

110
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here to defy gravity,

111
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please let's welcome Wild Gary Roberts!

112
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- Rodgers!
- Rodgers!

113
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He said that. He said Rodgers.

114
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Yeah, 'cause I told him to!

115
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He said it the first time.

116
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I... I wish we could...
'Cause he did say it the first time.

117
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- Stop talking.
- All right. I will.

118
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You get up there
and you show these people who you are.

119
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Gary Rodgers.

120
00:06:22.132 --> 00:06:24.051
It's Gary Rodgers. You said that, right?

121
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The second time.

122
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Yeah, but you knew it.

123
00:06:26.844 --> 00:06:28.513
Okay, guys, let's do this.

124
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What are you saying?
I don't know what you're...

125
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What are you pointing to?
I can only go forward.

126
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Oh, my God.

127
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He's really gonna jump
over all those trailers?

128
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Sir, my client is the best daredevil
trapeze artist in the world.

129
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Thank you very much.

130
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Let's go.

131
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Yeah!

132
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What?

133
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...Oh, shit!

134
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Jesus Christ!

135
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Sandy.

136
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- He had this one guy, Ted Rafferty...
- Oh, yeah.

137
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...who was a, you know, puppet act.
Not that good. Like, a middle act.

138
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He believed in him.
He thought he was the greatest.

139
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He's like, "I'm gonna make him
the next Mr. Buttons."

140
00:07:30.033 --> 00:07:33.036
So, uh, Charlie,
have you always been a puppet?

141
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Well, I don't know.
Have you always been a parade float?

142
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I'm just trying
to get to know you better, that's all.

143
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Know me better?
I'm sitting on your lap.

144
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No, but seriously,
what's it like being a puppet?

145
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Well, I come from
a long line of puppets.

146
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My father was a puppet.
My father's father was a puppet.

147
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Really? Was your father's father's
father a puppet?

148
00:07:56.393 --> 00:07:58.686
Wait for the punch line, buddy.

149
00:08:01.523 --> 00:08:05.360
Somebody call JCPenney.
One of the mannequins is on the loose.

150
00:08:08.071 --> 00:08:09.781
Sir, have you ever had
a date in your life?

151
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Actually, I have.

152
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Your Anita Bryant poster doesn't count.

153
00:08:17.872 --> 00:08:20.625
But honestly, sir,
how long have you been dead for?

154
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Where do you come up with this stuff?
I wish you didn't.

155
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That was hysterical.

156
00:08:31.094 --> 00:08:32.387
So you caught the whole show, then?

157
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I saw every word of it.
It was sensational.

158
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I saw you come in late!

159
00:08:36.849 --> 00:08:39.394
Nah. Nah, I was there the whole time.

160
00:08:39.477 --> 00:08:41.188
Will you get a load of this bullcrap.

161
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I was. I was.

162
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Hey, hey, hey, hey,
now, guys, guys, please.

163
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All right. Sandy, I... I believe you.

164
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Thank you, Ted.

165
00:08:48.695 --> 00:08:53.158
And I was thinking, you'd do so well now
with the beach theater crowd.

166
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And you've got the once a month gig
opening for Fred Travalena at the Trop.

167
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I don't wanna lose that.

168
00:08:59.539 --> 00:09:02.042
It might be time
to move on to the next level.

169
00:09:02.125 --> 00:09:03.960
Kicking the piss out of you?

170
00:09:04.044 --> 00:09:06.838
No. Television.

171
00:09:07.964 --> 00:09:09.049
But...

172
00:09:09.132 --> 00:09:11.509
I don't know the first thing
about the TV business.

173
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That's why you got me.

174
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- I know my way around the networks.
- Liar!

175
00:09:15.097 --> 00:09:18.516
Hey, I've had a relationship
with CBS since 1965

176
00:09:18.600 --> 00:09:20.518
when I was a PA on Gilligan's Island.

177
00:09:20.602 --> 00:09:24.772
Now, look, kids love the puppets.
And I know there's an audience for that.

178
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Mmm, maybe.

179
00:09:27.109 --> 00:09:28.776
Well, what about this?

180
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I know it's out of left field,
but how about a show for kids?

181
00:09:33.156 --> 00:09:34.657
Yeah, I was just saying that.

182
00:09:34.741 --> 00:09:36.243
So we agree.

183
00:09:37.785 --> 00:09:40.288
My favorite thing about Sandy
is where he lived.

184
00:09:40.372 --> 00:09:41.914
The place was a palace.

185
00:09:41.998 --> 00:09:44.126
He lived
on the biggest property in Bel Air.

186
00:09:44.209 --> 00:09:45.210
Yeah.

187
00:09:45.293 --> 00:09:46.586
Gorgeous pool.

188
00:09:46.669 --> 00:09:49.631
One of the finest collections
of luxury cars I've ever seen.

189
00:09:50.215 --> 00:09:53.718
Make sure you hydrate, Yoshi!
It's a hot day!

190
00:09:56.554 --> 00:09:58.723
Of course, none of it belonged to Sandy.

191
00:09:58.806 --> 00:10:00.808
It was owned by some Jewish Iranian...

192
00:10:00.892 --> 00:10:03.936
The guy never even set foot
in the United States.

193
00:10:04.020 --> 00:10:06.356
...who needed Sandy there
for legal reasons.

194
00:10:06.439 --> 00:10:10.067
And he was not allowed
in the main house.

195
00:10:10.152 --> 00:10:12.737
He was in the cabana by the pool.

196
00:10:12.820 --> 00:10:15.907
...No, no, no, no.

197
00:10:17.033 --> 00:10:20.370
Oh, no! Oh, no, no!
No, no, no!

198
00:10:20.453 --> 00:10:22.372
Stay! Stay! Stay!

199
00:10:24.081 --> 00:10:28.253
I've lived here for four years already.
You should know me by now.

200
00:10:28.336 --> 00:10:30.963
Get to see the face.
The king of Hollywood.

201
00:10:31.047 --> 00:10:32.048
Do you understand me?

202
00:10:32.132 --> 00:10:33.550
- Sandy?
- Ahh!

203
00:10:34.759 --> 00:10:39.013
Oh. Hi, uh, Amy.
Hi, Donna and Kendra.

204
00:10:39.096 --> 00:10:40.640
- Lola.
- Jesse.

205
00:10:40.723 --> 00:10:44.144
Yeah, that's right.
Wow, they're getting sharp.

206
00:10:44.227 --> 00:10:47.104
What brings you all the way out here
from Tarzana?

207
00:10:47.189 --> 00:10:49.357
Well, you said you'd watch the kids
while I go on the audition.

208
00:10:49.441 --> 00:10:50.442
Is that still okay?

209
00:10:50.525 --> 00:10:56.364
Oh, don't be silly. Of course.
We're gonna have a good time, guys.

210
00:10:56.448 --> 00:10:57.532
I have to get it, Sandy.

211
00:10:57.615 --> 00:10:59.909
I'm working two jobs
just to tread water out here.

212
00:10:59.992 --> 00:11:04.747
You're the quintessential American mother.
Oscar Mayer would be crazy to pass on you.

213
00:11:04.831 --> 00:11:08.835
Oscar Mayer? I thought I was auditioning
to play a hooker in a Wes Craven movie.

214
00:11:08.918 --> 00:11:12.297
You know what? My doctor put me
on a new thyroid medicine.

215
00:11:12.380 --> 00:11:15.383
He said it might make me foggy,
and I guess he was right.

216
00:11:16.384 --> 00:11:17.927
- Okay, Sandy, I'm gonna go.
- Yeah.

217
00:11:18.010 --> 00:11:19.804
Girls, be nice to Mr. Wexler. Okay?

218
00:11:19.887 --> 00:11:20.888
Yes, Mommy.

219
00:11:20.972 --> 00:11:22.724
- Oh, we're gonna have fun, guys.
- Okay.

220
00:11:22.807 --> 00:11:24.976
- Go get 'em, kid. Go get 'em.
- Okay.

221
00:11:26.060 --> 00:11:27.937
Oh, there's dogs out there. They...

222
00:11:28.020 --> 00:11:32.442
Hey! Hi, guys. Hi, sweet girl. Hi.

223
00:11:33.401 --> 00:11:35.403
So what are you shmegegges up for?

224
00:11:35.487 --> 00:11:38.948
I have the original script
of On Golden Pond.

225
00:11:39.031 --> 00:11:41.033
Do you wanna read that out loud?

226
00:11:41.117 --> 00:11:42.159
No?

227
00:11:42.244 --> 00:11:43.661
What would you like to do?

228
00:11:43.745 --> 00:11:44.829
Go swimming?

229
00:11:44.912 --> 00:11:47.540
No, no, no.
That could get me kicked out of here.

230
00:11:47.624 --> 00:11:49.083
I thought you were
the king of Hollywood?

231
00:11:49.166 --> 00:11:50.252
I never said that.

232
00:11:50.335 --> 00:11:53.045
- You said it to the dogs.
- Like a minute ago.

233
00:11:53.129 --> 00:11:54.088
No, I didn't.

234
00:11:55.298 --> 00:11:57.717
You guys like roller coasters?

235
00:11:58.593 --> 00:12:00.803
Unbelievable.

236
00:12:00.887 --> 00:12:05.558
Rifkin left Triad and he's joining forces
with Zifkin over at William Morris.

237
00:12:05.642 --> 00:12:12.399
After I was promoted out of the mail-room
at MCA, I was assigned to Frank Gorshin.

238
00:12:12.482 --> 00:12:17.445
And Frank Gorshin used to have me
hand-wash the Riddler costume,

239
00:12:17.529 --> 00:12:22.784
because he felt washing machines
might stretch out the material.

240
00:12:24.118 --> 00:12:27.622
Hey, guys, this way.
This way. Come with me.

241
00:12:29.291 --> 00:12:32.084
♪ All through the wintertime ♪

242
00:12:32.168 --> 00:12:35.297
♪ He hid himself away ♪

243
00:12:35.380 --> 00:12:38.425
♪ Ashamed to show his face ♪

244
00:12:38.508 --> 00:12:41.177
♪ Afraid of what others might say ♪

245
00:12:41.969 --> 00:12:47.809
♪ All through the winter
In his lonely clump of leaves ♪

246
00:12:47.892 --> 00:12:51.062
- Hey, dude, I can't see.
- What? Okay.

247
00:12:51.145 --> 00:12:56.067
♪ And very soon agreed
Indeed ♪

248
00:12:56.150 --> 00:12:59.321
Yes, a very fine swan indeed.

249
00:13:00.530 --> 00:13:03.282
Take a look at yourself in the lake.
You'll see.

250
00:13:03.366 --> 00:13:05.827
♪ I'm not such an ugly duckling ♪

251
00:13:05.910 --> 00:13:09.414
♪ No feathers all stubby and brown ♪

252
00:13:09.497 --> 00:13:11.207
Pitch perfect.

253
00:13:11.290 --> 00:13:16.546
♪ In so many words
Say the best in town ♪

254
00:13:16.629 --> 00:13:18.172
♪ The best ♪

255
00:13:18.255 --> 00:13:19.924
♪ The best ♪

256
00:13:20.007 --> 00:13:21.343
♪ The best in town ♪

257
00:13:23.260 --> 00:13:24.387
Very nice.

258
00:13:25.137 --> 00:13:27.515
Excuse me.
You were fantastic up there.

259
00:13:27.599 --> 00:13:29.601
- Oh, thanks. You're sweet.
- Yeah.

260
00:13:29.684 --> 00:13:30.893
It's corny, but it's fun.

261
00:13:30.977 --> 00:13:33.730
Corny? That had an edge to it.
I'm Sandy Wexler.

262
00:13:33.813 --> 00:13:35.857
Courtney. Nice to meet you.

263
00:13:35.940 --> 00:13:38.443
I just... I couldn't keep
my eyes off you up there.

264
00:13:38.526 --> 00:13:41.070
Please don't hit on me
in front of your kids. That's creepy.

265
00:13:41.153 --> 00:13:42.864
- He's not our dad.
- No, I'm not.

266
00:13:42.947 --> 00:13:43.990
He's the king of Hollywood.

267
00:13:44.073 --> 00:13:46.576
She thinks I said that to the dogs,
but I didn't.

268
00:13:46.659 --> 00:13:49.120
Listen, can we talk somewhere?
I'm a talent manager.

269
00:13:49.203 --> 00:13:51.330
I kinda gotta go.
We have a show every 12 minutes.

270
00:13:51.414 --> 00:13:53.833
It'll take four minutes of your time.
It'll be worth it.

271
00:13:57.545 --> 00:14:01.215
...someone who advises you,
someone who guides you,

272
00:14:01.298 --> 00:14:05.512
who makes the tough phone calls,
fights the big fights.

273
00:14:06.137 --> 00:14:07.138
Atkins.

274
00:14:08.723 --> 00:14:10.307
I mean, your voice,

275
00:14:10.392 --> 00:14:13.978
it sounds like a...
a bird and an angel had a baby.

276
00:14:15.146 --> 00:14:17.356
And you just so happen to be beautiful.

277
00:14:17.982 --> 00:14:19.526
You can't teach beautiful.

278
00:14:19.609 --> 00:14:22.904
If you could, I'd be in class right now,
believe me.

279
00:14:24.196 --> 00:14:26.198
I'm telling you, you could be somebody.

280
00:14:26.783 --> 00:14:29.619
Come on. If I was gonna be anybody,
I'd be her by now.

281
00:14:30.286 --> 00:14:32.121
Everybody's gotta start somewhere.

282
00:14:32.204 --> 00:14:36.250
Buddy Hackett was a dishwasher
in the Catskills till he was 60.

283
00:14:36.333 --> 00:14:40.171
Barbra Streisand started
as a backup singer in a petting zoo.

284
00:14:40.254 --> 00:14:43.383
Liza Minnelli used to
sing in a coal mine.

285
00:14:43.966 --> 00:14:45.510
Wasn't her mother Judy Garland?

286
00:14:45.593 --> 00:14:47.178
No, that's made up.

287
00:14:48.179 --> 00:14:51.808
The mightiest tornado
starts with a small breeze.

288
00:14:51.891 --> 00:14:53.643
You sound like a fortune cookie.

289
00:14:53.726 --> 00:14:56.062
I used to represent a guy
who wrote fortune cookies.

290
00:14:56.145 --> 00:14:57.730
Get out of here.

291
00:14:57.814 --> 00:15:00.274
Yeah, he wrote for Happy Days
and fortune cookies.

292
00:15:01.233 --> 00:15:02.234
Let me ask you something.

293
00:15:04.070 --> 00:15:05.697
Why do you do what you do?

294
00:15:06.864 --> 00:15:08.408
I don't know.

295
00:15:08.491 --> 00:15:11.411
The only time I really feel alive
is when I'm singing.

296
00:15:11.494 --> 00:15:15.832
Well, imagine if you were singing
on stage in front of 50,000 people.

297
00:15:15.915 --> 00:15:17.667
You think you'd feel alive then?

298
00:15:18.292 --> 00:15:21.754
Up there singing like a bird
and an angel had a baby?

299
00:15:22.338 --> 00:15:24.298
You like the bird and angel thing,
don't you?

300
00:15:24.381 --> 00:15:25.925
I said that already?

301
00:15:26.008 --> 00:15:28.052
- Can I ask you something?
- Please do.

302
00:15:28.135 --> 00:15:30.012
Can you get any of that food
in your mouth?

303
00:15:32.181 --> 00:15:37.562
So you're saying I should quit right now
and leave with you?

304
00:15:37.645 --> 00:15:40.690
You're too big for this duck pond.
It's time to fly.

305
00:15:42.149 --> 00:15:44.068
You like to make trouble,
don't you, Sandy?

306
00:15:45.319 --> 00:15:47.113
What do you say? Wanna team up?

307
00:15:47.697 --> 00:15:51.408
I'll tell you what I told Josh Gelfand
in the sixth grade

308
00:15:51.493 --> 00:15:53.786
- when he asked me to the spring social.
- Uh-huh.

309
00:15:53.870 --> 00:15:56.122
I'd love to,
but we gotta ask my dad first.

310
00:15:56.205 --> 00:15:58.415
Ooh!

311
00:16:01.753 --> 00:16:04.547
I guess I should have mentioned
my Dad's in Seward, Alaska.

312
00:16:04.631 --> 00:16:06.382
Oh, that's fine. I love it there.

313
00:16:06.466 --> 00:16:07.300
It's beautiful.

314
00:16:07.383 --> 00:16:09.594
- Oh, you've been?
- No, I haven't been there.

315
00:16:10.553 --> 00:16:11.971
- But you just said...
- No, I didn't.

316
00:16:13.139 --> 00:16:15.517
I guess I should have also
mentioned the prison thing.

317
00:16:15.600 --> 00:16:16.601
Are you kidding?

318
00:16:16.684 --> 00:16:19.979
I was in prison my entire childhood.

319
00:16:20.062 --> 00:16:24.275
An emotional prison.
That's a life sentence, I'm telling you.

320
00:16:24.901 --> 00:16:29.280
- The Yugo, imported from France.
- Isn't it from Yugoslavia?

321
00:16:29.363 --> 00:16:35.620
No. "You go" to France.
"You go" and have a good time. Bonjour.

322
00:16:39.165 --> 00:16:40.750
Hey, Poppy.

323
00:16:40.833 --> 00:16:42.209
How you doing?

324
00:16:42.293 --> 00:16:44.587
Oh, it's always a great day
when I see my little girl.

325
00:16:44.671 --> 00:16:49.216
Mr. Clarke, truly a pleasure.
Sandy Wexler of Wexler Artists.

326
00:16:49.300 --> 00:16:51.052
Is this the fool that
want to manage you?

327
00:16:51.636 --> 00:16:54.972
Um, yes, I did come up here
to talk to you about that.

328
00:16:55.056 --> 00:16:59.143
And if you're available
to speak, you know, and now's the time,

329
00:16:59.226 --> 00:17:01.688
I would love to have
a conversation about this.

330
00:17:01.771 --> 00:17:03.690
If we could conversate, I'm here to...

331
00:17:03.773 --> 00:17:05.858
What about Six Flags Magic Mountain?

332
00:17:06.984 --> 00:17:09.737
I mean, she got benefits,
a paycheck every week.

333
00:17:09.821 --> 00:17:11.238
That mountain is truly magical.

334
00:17:11.322 --> 00:17:12.364
No, it is.

335
00:17:12.448 --> 00:17:16.368
I just, with all due respect,
I think your daughter has the magic.

336
00:17:16.452 --> 00:17:20.707
With her talent,
she could have a dream-come-true life.

337
00:17:20.790 --> 00:17:22.208
You mean, better than all of this?

338
00:17:23.918 --> 00:17:24.752
What?

339
00:17:26.378 --> 00:17:27.714
Dad.

340
00:17:28.422 --> 00:17:29.591
Who else have you managed?

341
00:17:29.674 --> 00:17:32.218
You ever hear of Indiana Jones?

342
00:17:32.301 --> 00:17:33.803
You work with Harrison Ford?

343
00:17:33.886 --> 00:17:36.222
No, but I do represent the guy

344
00:17:36.305 --> 00:17:39.266
who got his heart pulled out
of his chest in Temple of Doom.

345
00:17:39.350 --> 00:17:40.434
I love that guy.

346
00:17:40.517 --> 00:17:42.019
Everybody does.

347
00:17:42.103 --> 00:17:44.772
I don't know anything
about show business, Sandy.

348
00:17:44.856 --> 00:17:46.107
How do I know if I can trust you?

349
00:17:46.190 --> 00:17:50.862
Because I can look you dead in the eye
and promise you this:

350
00:17:51.571 --> 00:17:55.532
I will always do what's best
for your daughter.

351
00:18:00.705 --> 00:18:02.373
Well, okay. In that case...

352
00:18:02.456 --> 00:18:06.210
♪ You got a new manager ♪

353
00:18:06.293 --> 00:18:08.504
♪ Thank you, Daddy ♪

354
00:18:08.588 --> 00:18:10.715
♪ What a wonderful moment ♪

355
00:18:10.798 --> 00:18:12.634
The singing is just for us.

356
00:18:12.717 --> 00:18:15.136
Okay. Good. Will do...
Will never do it again.

357
00:18:15.219 --> 00:18:17.429
You guys want to go out and celebrate?

358
00:18:17.513 --> 00:18:18.806
I can't go nowhere.

359
00:18:18.890 --> 00:18:22.101
Oh, that's right. I'm sorry.
Please don't shiv me.

360
00:18:22.184 --> 00:18:26.438
Shiv you? Man, I ain't no inmate. I work
here. I've got... got the night shift.

361
00:18:26.522 --> 00:18:28.775
What the... What?

362
00:18:28.858 --> 00:18:30.026
Got ya.

363
00:18:30.109 --> 00:18:32.153
Oh! Ha!

364
00:18:32.236 --> 00:18:33.237
Very good.

365
00:18:33.320 --> 00:18:37.491
Darling, you should take Sandy out
for a dinner and a show, Alaskan style.

366
00:18:39.994 --> 00:18:42.622
- That's amazing.
- Right?

367
00:18:42.705 --> 00:18:43.915
So good.

368
00:18:43.998 --> 00:18:48.210
The northern lights
and my new friend Sandy.

369
00:18:48.294 --> 00:18:49.712
That's as good as it gets.

370
00:18:50.587 --> 00:18:52.589
Northern lights are something else.

371
00:18:52.674 --> 00:18:54.425
I was actually talking
about the burger, though.

372
00:18:54.508 --> 00:18:56.886
Is this bison, or is it moose meat?

373
00:18:56.969 --> 00:18:58.721
What's making it so good?

374
00:18:58.805 --> 00:19:00.890
It's a hamburger, crazy man.

375
00:19:00.973 --> 00:19:03.059
- A hamburger?
- And you're missing out without the bun.

376
00:19:03.142 --> 00:19:04.518
Now, the bun...

377
00:19:04.601 --> 00:19:06.729
If I lose five more pounds,
it's back to the buns.

378
00:19:06.813 --> 00:19:07.814
Oh, my God.

379
00:19:10.191 --> 00:19:12.318
So you really think I could be somebody?

380
00:19:12.902 --> 00:19:15.571
- You are going straight to the top.
- Yeah?

381
00:19:15.655 --> 00:19:17.907
Up there
with all the other beautiful stars.

382
00:19:18.741 --> 00:19:19.992
Show me which star I am.

383
00:19:20.076 --> 00:19:22.286
- You wanna know which star you are?
- Yeah.

384
00:19:22.369 --> 00:19:23.454
Let's see.

385
00:19:23.537 --> 00:19:26.165
You are that one right there.

386
00:19:26.248 --> 00:19:28.000
Sandy, that's an airplane.

387
00:19:28.625 --> 00:19:31.462
I know. I told you,
you were going places.

388
00:19:31.545 --> 00:19:34.548
- That's real smooth, Sandy.
- Thank you.

389
00:19:34.631 --> 00:19:36.550
You must be a real lady-killer.

390
00:19:36.633 --> 00:19:38.010
Listen,

391
00:19:38.094 --> 00:19:41.347
if we're gonna do business together,
we gotta have boundaries.

392
00:19:41.430 --> 00:19:43.808
I'm sorry,
but I learned that the hard way.

393
00:19:43.891 --> 00:19:45.392
A bad breakup?

394
00:19:46.435 --> 00:19:48.020
His name was Alfred.

395
00:19:48.104 --> 00:19:50.064
Oh, you're gay!

396
00:19:51.273 --> 00:19:52.399
I can see that now.

397
00:19:52.483 --> 00:19:54.694
No, I'm not gay as far as I know.

398
00:19:56.070 --> 00:19:59.115
- Alfred was my first client.
- Mmm-hmm.

399
00:19:59.198 --> 00:20:01.701
More than that.
He was... He was my best friend.

400
00:20:01.784 --> 00:20:02.994
Did he die?

401
00:20:03.077 --> 00:20:04.286
No, no.

402
00:20:05.621 --> 00:20:09.500
He got famous, and he, uh...
and he dumped me.

403
00:20:10.334 --> 00:20:11.335
That dick!

404
00:20:11.418 --> 00:20:14.964
He wasn't a dick.
I was the dick. It was my fault.

405
00:20:15.047 --> 00:20:18.217
I let the friendship
get in the way of the business.

406
00:20:18.300 --> 00:20:22.221
Now understand it's show business,
not show friendship. Right?

407
00:20:22.304 --> 00:20:23.931
That is so sad.

408
00:20:24.015 --> 00:20:26.475
It's not sad.
It's actually a good thing.

409
00:20:26.558 --> 00:20:30.479
Because I got a stable of talent
in Hollywood

410
00:20:30.562 --> 00:20:34.150
that I, quite frankly,
think is the best of the bunch.

411
00:20:34.233 --> 00:20:37.528
And Eisner knows it,
and Ovitch knows it.

412
00:20:38.529 --> 00:20:41.032
I'm sorry,
and I don't wanna toot my own horn

413
00:20:41.115 --> 00:20:43.993
'cause that's not what I like to do,
but toot-toot.

414
00:20:44.701 --> 00:20:45.828
Hmm.

415
00:20:45.912 --> 00:20:48.622
Best thing to me is I found you.

416
00:20:50.166 --> 00:20:51.542
I'm glad you found me.

417
00:20:51.625 --> 00:20:54.128
You're not as happy as I am.
Trust me.

418
00:20:54.711 --> 00:20:56.672
But we gotta get to work.

419
00:20:56.756 --> 00:20:58.549
Whenever Sandy signed a new client,

420
00:20:58.632 --> 00:21:02.762
he had a team of support people that
immediately began making over the client.

421
00:21:02.845 --> 00:21:06.265
He would just enroll everybody
in classes for the stuff they didn't do.

422
00:21:06.348 --> 00:21:08.267
Movement, martial arts...

423
00:21:08.350 --> 00:21:11.062
A posture person,
and then a hair person.

424
00:21:11.145 --> 00:21:13.439
- And no one was better off after that.
- No.

425
00:21:13.522 --> 00:21:14.523
It was a train wreck.

426
00:21:14.606 --> 00:21:15.775
I'm not a dancer, Sandy.

427
00:21:15.858 --> 00:21:18.069
- It doesn't matter if you can't dance.
- It's all right.

428
00:21:18.152 --> 00:21:21.113
- Miss Gideon is gonna teach you to move.
- I got you, sweetheart.

429
00:21:21.197 --> 00:21:23.532
- It's about presence on stage.
- All right. That's enough, Sandy.

430
00:21:23.615 --> 00:21:25.367
- All right. Here we go.
- It's about being comfortable.

431
00:21:25.451 --> 00:21:28.162
- You know, Baryshnikov, I hear...
- Shut it, Sandy. I got her.

432
00:21:28.245 --> 00:21:31.665
...Who me? Who me? Who me?

433
00:21:31.748 --> 00:21:33.709
I'm a rock star. I'm a rock star.

434
00:21:33.793 --> 00:21:37.922
And pass the mic. Pass the mic.
Down the mic. Down the mic.

435
00:21:38.005 --> 00:21:39.340
That's it. That's it.

436
00:21:39.423 --> 00:21:41.175
- That's it. Now you're in it.
- Bobby Brown.

437
00:21:41.258 --> 00:21:43.385
More madness! Stomp the ant.

438
00:21:43.469 --> 00:21:45.012
Seattle. Seattle.

439
00:21:46.013 --> 00:21:48.850
- She doesn't know how to dance?
- You're a diva!

440
00:21:48.933 --> 00:21:51.978
- This girl can do it all.
- Feel it. And stop!

441
00:21:52.061 --> 00:21:53.229
Hammer time!

442
00:21:57.149 --> 00:21:58.901
Wonderful.

443
00:21:58.985 --> 00:22:00.945
Okay. Let's see it.

444
00:22:01.988 --> 00:22:03.780
...Very good.

445
00:22:05.157 --> 00:22:06.158
Very bad.

446
00:22:07.076 --> 00:22:08.619
Complete shit.

447
00:22:08.702 --> 00:22:12.957
You know what? I don't like the ice cream.
It's a bad idea. Looks terrible.

448
00:22:13.040 --> 00:22:16.502
Now let's go sexy, huh?
Can you give me some sexy, Courtney?

449
00:22:16.585 --> 00:22:18.379
Come on.
Let's put on some sexy music, Willow.

450
00:22:22.258 --> 00:22:26.762
Okay. Yes. Let's shoop this shit.
Shoop it up, huh?

451
00:22:26.845 --> 00:22:29.932
Let's shoop the shoop.
Show me the sexy. Come on.

452
00:22:30.016 --> 00:22:31.475
Give me sexy.

453
00:22:31.558 --> 00:22:33.685
Honey, think of something sexy, huh?

454
00:22:33.769 --> 00:22:36.063
- Like what?
- Like moose burgers.

455
00:22:36.147 --> 00:22:37.648
...And there it is. Shoot that.

456
00:22:38.274 --> 00:22:41.860
Ah, Sandy likes it. No one knows why.

457
00:22:41.944 --> 00:22:43.529
Put your hand on your chin.

458
00:22:44.821 --> 00:22:46.448
Not like you're stroking a beard.

459
00:22:46.532 --> 00:22:49.243
Like you're thinking,
thinking filthy thoughts.

460
00:22:49.326 --> 00:22:50.995
Like wieners!

461
00:22:51.078 --> 00:22:54.665
Ah, that's good, Willow!
Wieners is good. You're brilliant today.

462
00:22:54.748 --> 00:22:56.918
Come on. Hand on chin,
thinking of wieners.

463
00:22:57.834 --> 00:22:58.835
I suck at this.

464
00:22:58.920 --> 00:23:00.296
- No, you don't. You're great.
- Oh, come on.

465
00:23:00.379 --> 00:23:02.381
It... You just... It's easy.

466
00:23:02.464 --> 00:23:03.590
Then you do it, Sandy.

467
00:23:03.674 --> 00:23:05.009
- Come on. Get over here.
- No, no, no, no.

468
00:23:05.092 --> 00:23:08.095
- You're a performer. I don't do that.
- Come on, Sandy.

469
00:23:08.179 --> 00:23:10.431
You said it's easy.
Dream of the wieners, huh?

470
00:23:10.514 --> 00:23:11.765
Come over here. Come on.

471
00:23:11.848 --> 00:23:13.850
Do I wear my glasses,
or do I take them off? Or...

472
00:23:13.935 --> 00:23:15.519
Nobody gives a shit. Come on.

473
00:23:16.478 --> 00:23:18.522
Eh...

474
00:23:18.605 --> 00:23:21.400
- You put your hand on the chin.
- Uh-huh.

475
00:23:21.483 --> 00:23:23.152
You just... You think.

476
00:23:25.237 --> 00:23:28.782
Huh? Just thinking.
Little more thinking over here.

477
00:23:29.450 --> 00:23:31.410
Yes, that's brilliant.

478
00:23:31.493 --> 00:23:35.164
Beautiful. Thank you, Sandy.
Clear out of frame.

479
00:23:35.247 --> 00:23:37.124
- Get out.
- No, I'm gonna miss him.

480
00:23:37.708 --> 00:23:40.211
No, you'll be fine.
Sexy will be right over here.

481
00:23:40.294 --> 00:23:41.503
- Don't worry.
- I'll be there.

482
00:23:41.587 --> 00:23:43.922
He's still got his hand on his chin.
He's so cute.

483
00:23:44.506 --> 00:23:46.300
Ah, that's much better.

484
00:23:46.383 --> 00:23:48.302
Yes, that's it.

485
00:23:48.385 --> 00:23:50.346
Yes, now I see sexy.

486
00:23:56.560 --> 00:23:58.980
The definition of, like, a given

487
00:23:59.063 --> 00:24:01.482
is that kids wake up
and they think, "Me so horny."

488
00:24:01.565 --> 00:24:05.277
And then, you know, you don't need
a song that just reinforces,

489
00:24:05.361 --> 00:24:06.695
they know they're so horny.

490
00:24:06.778 --> 00:24:09.198
If it was, like, "Me So Introspective"
or something like that.

491
00:24:09.281 --> 00:24:11.575
Or "Me So Ambivalent" or...

492
00:24:11.658 --> 00:24:12.994
Just so good.

493
00:24:13.077 --> 00:24:16.622
Talk about fearless.
Best in town by far.

494
00:24:16.705 --> 00:24:18.374
Isn't she?

495
00:24:18.457 --> 00:24:19.583
She? Who's she?

496
00:24:20.376 --> 00:24:21.377
What?

497
00:24:22.003 --> 00:24:24.505
- Did you call him?
- Yeah, I called him.

498
00:24:24.588 --> 00:24:25.756
What'd he say?

499
00:24:27.258 --> 00:24:30.011
- What'd who say?
- The guy you called.

500
00:24:30.094 --> 00:24:31.512
Who did I call?

501
00:24:32.096 --> 00:24:34.598
The guy from
the Young Comedians Special.

502
00:24:34.681 --> 00:24:37.018
Oh, yeah. No, I gotta call him.

503
00:24:37.101 --> 00:24:39.895
- So you didn't call him?
- No, I called him.

504
00:24:39.978 --> 00:24:41.230
No, you didn't.

505
00:24:41.313 --> 00:24:42.689
I thought you called him.

506
00:24:42.773 --> 00:24:45.151
Sandy, you're making
even less sense than usual.

507
00:24:45.234 --> 00:24:46.110
No, I'm not.

508
00:24:46.193 --> 00:24:48.195
- Something's off.
- Off how?

509
00:24:48.279 --> 00:24:50.906
I don't know. Different.

510
00:24:52.033 --> 00:24:53.325
Did you dye your hair or something?

511
00:24:53.909 --> 00:24:54.993
I don't think so.

512
00:24:55.077 --> 00:24:56.620
Maybe it's a brain tumor.

513
00:24:56.703 --> 00:24:58.205
Maybe it is.

514
00:24:58.289 --> 00:25:01.792
- Anyway, can we run lines?
- Yeah, that's why I'm here.

515
00:25:03.419 --> 00:25:05.712
I need to know the truth,
you son of a bitch!

516
00:25:05.796 --> 00:25:09.466
All right, I dyed my hair.
Just the tips. You happy?

517
00:25:09.550 --> 00:25:11.302
No, the line, Sandy.

518
00:25:11.968 --> 00:25:14.055
I know. I was improvising.

519
00:25:14.138 --> 00:25:16.432
But you want this line? Um...

520
00:25:16.515 --> 00:25:21.228
"The truth? You wouldn't know the truth
if it bit you on the..."

521
00:25:21.312 --> 00:25:22.604
Bird.

522
00:25:22.688 --> 00:25:24.815
We gotta find a way.
Don't you think, Sandy?

523
00:25:25.899 --> 00:25:27.151
Sandy?

524
00:25:27.234 --> 00:25:29.153
A way? What way?

525
00:25:29.236 --> 00:25:31.113
A way to get rid of the birds.

526
00:25:31.197 --> 00:25:34.616
Yeah, a bird and a baby had an angel.

527
00:25:35.201 --> 00:25:36.535
Are you stoned or something?

528
00:25:36.618 --> 00:25:39.413
Stoned? I don't do pot. Come on.

529
00:25:39.496 --> 00:25:43.542
Well, you seem stoned out of your mind.
What's with the crazy smile?

530
00:25:43.625 --> 00:25:48.380
I don't know, I'm just smiling at the fact
you might become the new Captain Kangaroo.

531
00:25:48.464 --> 00:25:49.840
He's lying again.

532
00:25:49.923 --> 00:25:51.467
No, I'm not. I'm not lying.

533
00:25:51.550 --> 00:25:55.679
I've been thinking about how you
can work on your kid-friendly material.

534
00:25:55.762 --> 00:25:57.306
Maybe go to Magic Mountain.

535
00:25:57.389 --> 00:26:00.184
When you see all the children on line,
just start doing jokes for 'em.

536
00:26:00.267 --> 00:26:02.561
- See if it works.
- That feels very child molestery.

537
00:26:02.644 --> 00:26:05.106
He wants to ruin you. Fire him!

538
00:26:05.189 --> 00:26:07.399
Fire me?
If you're firing anybody, I'd fire him.

539
00:26:07.483 --> 00:26:09.151
He's useless. He does nothing.

540
00:26:09.235 --> 00:26:11.112
I do everything! What do you do?

541
00:26:11.195 --> 00:26:13.155
Guys, guys, guys!
Come on, we're on the same team here.

542
00:26:13.239 --> 00:26:15.073
- That's what I'm trying to tell him.
- Yes.

543
00:26:15.157 --> 00:26:16.367
Teammates?

544
00:26:17.284 --> 00:26:18.535
Yeah, thank you.

545
00:26:19.911 --> 00:26:23.081
- You took my arm! You took my arm!
- Oh, come off it. That's...

546
00:26:23.165 --> 00:26:25.126
- You took my arm!
- That's not...

547
00:26:25.209 --> 00:26:26.835
Thank you, Martin.

548
00:26:26.918 --> 00:26:31.257
Let's find out who the judges chose
as returning champ tonight.

549
00:26:31.840 --> 00:26:35.594
The judges gave Kevin Connors one star

550
00:26:35.677 --> 00:26:39.264
and the champion,
Martin Lawrence, four stars!

551
00:26:39.348 --> 00:26:41.057
The new champion, Martin Lawrence.

552
00:26:42.267 --> 00:26:45.187
...Oh... Come on.

553
00:26:45.979 --> 00:26:47.314
Wexler Artists.

554
00:26:47.398 --> 00:26:49.275
- It's me.
- Hi, Kevin.

555
00:26:49.358 --> 00:26:50.401
Did you know that was on?

556
00:26:50.484 --> 00:26:52.944
No. I didn't know
they were gonna repeat it.

557
00:26:53.028 --> 00:26:54.613
- I never want to see that again!
- Well...

558
00:26:54.696 --> 00:26:58.784
I can't stop them, Kevin, legally,
'cause we signed an agreement.

559
00:26:58.867 --> 00:27:00.619
It's... They own the material.

560
00:27:19.221 --> 00:27:21.432
Well, she'd light up a room
in that purple one.

561
00:27:31.900 --> 00:27:32.984
Sandy!

562
00:27:33.527 --> 00:27:35.487
Barry Bubatzi.

563
00:27:36.154 --> 00:27:37.155
Barry.

564
00:27:37.989 --> 00:27:40.826
Yeah, I was Carr D'Angelo's assistant?

565
00:27:41.410 --> 00:27:44.288
- Hiccups? That's you?
- Yeah.

566
00:27:44.371 --> 00:27:46.915
- Look at this. Hiccups.
- Yeah.

567
00:27:46.998 --> 00:27:48.292
Bubatzi!

568
00:27:48.375 --> 00:27:50.043
He... he called me Hiccups

569
00:27:50.126 --> 00:27:52.588
because I had the hiccups this one time
I was on the phone with him.

570
00:27:52.671 --> 00:27:54.381
Well, listen,
he didn't just have the hiccups,

571
00:27:54.465 --> 00:27:55.757
he had the hiccups.

572
00:27:55.841 --> 00:27:57.676
- He wouldn't stop hiccupping.
- Yeah.

573
00:27:57.759 --> 00:28:01.222
Uh, you can die from hiccups.
I was terrified.

574
00:28:01.305 --> 00:28:02.973
I was actually concerned.

575
00:28:03.056 --> 00:28:06.268
...It was nerve-racking. A little bit.

576
00:28:06.352 --> 00:28:09.438
How's your sister?
Did she get into Penn State?

577
00:28:09.521 --> 00:28:12.649
- She just graduated.
- Another successful Bubatzi.

578
00:28:12.733 --> 00:28:16.612
- You see, that is why I love this guy.
- What?

579
00:28:16.695 --> 00:28:20.115
He actually talked to me
when I was just an assistant.

580
00:28:20.198 --> 00:28:22.200
You treated me with respect, Sandy.

581
00:28:22.284 --> 00:28:23.827
- Not many people did.
- Well, of course.

582
00:28:23.910 --> 00:28:25.829
- This is my girl, Mary.
- Hi.

583
00:28:25.912 --> 00:28:27.122
Mary. Sandy Wexler.

584
00:28:27.205 --> 00:28:28.374
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

585
00:28:28.457 --> 00:28:29.833
Are you...
What happened to your arm?

586
00:28:30.584 --> 00:28:34.588
- Yeah, I got myself a tattoo.
- What'd you get?

587
00:28:34.671 --> 00:28:37.716
Uh... it is that of a dog bite.

588
00:28:39.218 --> 00:28:41.094
So how's Carr D'Angelo?

589
00:28:41.177 --> 00:28:44.139
Well, he, uh... he left.
He's working for Blockbuster Video now.

590
00:28:44.723 --> 00:28:48.352
Smart move. The music business
has its ups and downs,

591
00:28:48.435 --> 00:28:51.438
but Blockbuster Video's here
for the long haul.

592
00:28:52.105 --> 00:28:54.190
And you, what are you up to?

593
00:28:54.275 --> 00:28:55.484
I left, too.

594
00:28:55.567 --> 00:28:57.778
- I'm at Capitol Records now.
- Oh.

595
00:28:57.861 --> 00:28:59.238
He's head of A&R.

596
00:29:00.364 --> 00:29:02.574
You know how happy that makes me?

597
00:29:02.658 --> 00:29:05.035
Hiccups Bubatzi goes big time.

598
00:29:05.118 --> 00:29:07.579
That's just...
That's the way it should be.

599
00:29:07.663 --> 00:29:09.831
You worked your ass off, kiddo.

600
00:29:09.915 --> 00:29:12.501
Can I talk business for a second?
Is that all right?

601
00:29:12.584 --> 00:29:14.628
I have a client that, actually,
you would love to meet...

602
00:29:14.711 --> 00:29:15.962
- Tell you what...
- What?

603
00:29:16.046 --> 00:29:19.550
Call my office next week. Yeah.

604
00:29:19.633 --> 00:29:21.843
I mean, you sure? 'Cause I will call.

605
00:29:21.927 --> 00:29:23.970
I know.

606
00:29:24.054 --> 00:29:25.764
- It was great seeing you, pal.
- It was great seeing you.

607
00:29:25.847 --> 00:29:28.267
And I hope, uh,
one of those dresses works out for you.

608
00:29:28.350 --> 00:29:30.436
- Oh, no, this isn't...
- Cute.

609
00:29:30.519 --> 00:29:32.604
- It was... I mean...
- So good.

610
00:29:33.188 --> 00:29:35.774
It's a Bubatzi world. We're all just...

611
00:29:35.857 --> 00:29:37.818
Could you please
not block the whole aisle?

612
00:29:38.777 --> 00:29:40.195
We're all just living in it.

613
00:29:40.279 --> 00:29:41.655
I wasn't blocking the aisle.

614
00:29:47.369 --> 00:29:48.454
Wow.

615
00:29:51.164 --> 00:29:53.041
- Hi.
- Hey, neighbor.

616
00:29:53.124 --> 00:29:54.960
Hi, Cindy!

617
00:29:55.043 --> 00:29:57.212
Where's that
billionaire landlord of yours?

618
00:29:57.296 --> 00:29:59.506
Is he ever going to grace us
with his presence?

619
00:29:59.590 --> 00:30:01.425
What a question.

620
00:30:01.508 --> 00:30:04.177
Listen, he's supposed to come out
for Rosh Hashanah,

621
00:30:04.260 --> 00:30:06.179
but he said last year Purim,
so who knows?

622
00:30:06.262 --> 00:30:08.223
...But anyways, how are you?

623
00:30:08.307 --> 00:30:09.600
How is your husband?

624
00:30:10.642 --> 00:30:12.728
Doctors say it could be
any day now. Hmm.

625
00:30:12.811 --> 00:30:15.564
Oh, I'm so sorry. It's just...

626
00:30:16.147 --> 00:30:18.609
How are you doing?
No one ever asks how you're doing.

627
00:30:18.692 --> 00:30:19.693
How you feeling?

628
00:30:20.276 --> 00:30:22.195
The truth is that I'm just...

629
00:30:22.904 --> 00:30:24.155
a little bit lonely.

630
00:30:24.239 --> 00:30:27.493
You were together so long.
Of course you're lonely.

631
00:30:27.576 --> 00:30:30.161
So if you ever see
my tennis court lights on at night...

632
00:30:31.287 --> 00:30:33.374
that means that I could
use some company.

633
00:30:36.877 --> 00:30:40.464
- It was great to see you, Cindy.
- Bye, Sandy.

634
00:30:41.089 --> 00:30:44.134
Okay, we're gonna go.
All right. Good night, now.

635
00:30:44.217 --> 00:30:45.552
Good night.

636
00:30:45.636 --> 00:30:48.389
Look, Gary Rodgers can't make that jump

637
00:30:48.472 --> 00:30:51.892
unless you clear
every bird from the sky, Tom.

638
00:30:54.811 --> 00:30:58.399
I don't know. Is there a spray for it?
Like, a... a roach spray or...

639
00:30:58.482 --> 00:31:00.275
There's dogs. There's dogs.

640
00:31:00.359 --> 00:31:02.277
A roach spray for birds.

641
00:31:03.111 --> 00:31:06.865
Tom, I'm sorry.
That's not my job. That's your job.

642
00:31:06.948 --> 00:31:08.909
That's why I'm telling you.

643
00:31:08.992 --> 00:31:10.327
I'm telling ya!

644
00:31:10.994 --> 00:31:14.205
Listen, don't do that to me!
I'll pull the plug on this thing!

645
00:31:14.289 --> 00:31:15.874
Do you hear me?

646
00:31:17.418 --> 00:31:20.629
All right. I'm sorry I got hot there,
Tom, but you weren't listening.

647
00:31:20.712 --> 00:31:24.340
Okay, here's a stock tip
for you to make up for that.

648
00:31:24.425 --> 00:31:26.718
Pull all your money out of Apple,

649
00:31:26.802 --> 00:31:28.887
'cause no one's using
the Macintosh anymore.

650
00:31:28.970 --> 00:31:35.351
Put 80% into small local bookstores,
the other 20% into Woolworth's.

651
00:31:36.269 --> 00:31:38.271
Righto.

652
00:31:38.397 --> 00:31:41.775
- Look at you, Mr. Manager Man.
- You don't wanna yell at people,

653
00:31:41.858 --> 00:31:43.944
but sometimes
it's the only way they can hear.

654
00:31:44.027 --> 00:31:45.111
You look stunning.

655
00:31:45.195 --> 00:31:50.451
Well, this yard is the most amazing yard
I've ever seen, and that pool...

656
00:31:50.534 --> 00:31:52.327
The pool's off-limits. House rules.

657
00:31:52.411 --> 00:31:54.788
So, Yuri stopped by my office.

658
00:31:54.871 --> 00:31:57.583
Yeah, I know. He's right there.

659
00:31:59.918 --> 00:32:02.754
You see him? Let's go over.

660
00:32:03.714 --> 00:32:06.508
We need to find the one
that expresses the right message.

661
00:32:06.592 --> 00:32:09.636
You know, "I'm fun.
I'm complicated. I'm sexy."

662
00:32:09.720 --> 00:32:11.930
I'm confused. I'm crazy.
I'm embarrassed.

663
00:32:12.013 --> 00:32:14.475
You're beautiful is what you are.
Stop that.

664
00:32:14.558 --> 00:32:17.060
...Got a hit on the hip.

665
00:32:17.143 --> 00:32:19.813
This is someone I actually have to call.

666
00:32:20.856 --> 00:32:22.816
Okay, I'll be back in a few seconds.

667
00:32:22.899 --> 00:32:24.568
Okay, cool, we'll be in the pool.

668
00:32:25.235 --> 00:32:26.653
You stay out of the pool.

669
00:32:26.737 --> 00:32:27.904
I was just kidding.

670
00:32:28.530 --> 00:32:30.824
I know, and it was hysterical.

671
00:32:30.907 --> 00:32:32.743
But seriously, stay out of the pool.

672
00:32:32.826 --> 00:32:34.911
No, not you, Barry. Hi!

673
00:32:36.663 --> 00:32:39.124
- I don't know how you do it.
- Do what?

674
00:32:39.750 --> 00:32:42.043
Deal with all the crazy Sandy shit.

675
00:32:42.127 --> 00:32:45.130
- Man, he's such a...
- Boner face?

676
00:32:45.213 --> 00:32:47.716
- I love that.
- He's not a boner face.

677
00:32:47.799 --> 00:32:49.676
- He's a badass.
- Okay.

678
00:32:50.511 --> 00:32:53.597
Well, listen, this girl is one
of the best singers you'll ever see,

679
00:32:53.680 --> 00:32:56.016
and the best, brightest person ever.

680
00:32:56.099 --> 00:32:59.853
I'm gonna go with the one
on the top right corner.

681
00:33:00.521 --> 00:33:03.356
And can you blow up... that one?

682
00:33:04.232 --> 00:33:05.567
Oh, my God.

683
00:33:05.651 --> 00:33:07.152
What? It's a good picture.

684
00:33:07.235 --> 00:33:09.613
Sandy already asked me
to do that for him.

685
00:33:12.866 --> 00:33:14.701
I have some interesting news.

686
00:33:14.785 --> 00:33:18.079
Capitol Records wants
to meet with you next week.

687
00:33:18.163 --> 00:33:19.831
They want to hear your demo.

688
00:33:21.207 --> 00:33:22.751
I don't have a demo.

689
00:33:22.834 --> 00:33:24.878
That's why you have me.

690
00:33:27.130 --> 00:33:31.677
♪ You make it feel like home ♪

691
00:33:31.760 --> 00:33:38.183
♪ You give me butterflies, butterflies
Down to my soul ♪

692
00:33:38.767 --> 00:33:43.188
♪ Butterfly, butterfly
You don't even know ♪

693
00:33:43.271 --> 00:33:49.778
♪ It's you who I speak of
And you who I dream of ♪

694
00:33:49.861 --> 00:33:55.867
♪ And nights when I'm all alone ♪

695
00:33:55.951 --> 00:34:01.331
♪ You make it feel like home ♪

696
00:34:06.377 --> 00:34:09.380
Courtney, one take. Perfection.

697
00:34:10.215 --> 00:34:12.300
You nailed it. That was...

698
00:34:13.218 --> 00:34:14.761
Thank you so much.

699
00:34:14.844 --> 00:34:17.138
I'm gonna play this back in here.

700
00:34:17.931 --> 00:34:20.809
I can't get over what I just heard. Wow.

701
00:34:20.892 --> 00:34:21.935
My God.

702
00:34:22.894 --> 00:34:26.272
Play it back. I...
I don't even know what to say right now.

703
00:34:27.232 --> 00:34:28.233
Uh...

704
00:34:31.570 --> 00:34:34.197
There's a chance I forgot to hit record.

705
00:34:35.198 --> 00:34:37.492
What do you mean
there's a chance you forgot?

706
00:34:37.576 --> 00:34:39.703
- I... I was gonna hit record...
- Uh-huh.

707
00:34:40.871 --> 00:34:42.163
Uh, then I forgot.

708
00:34:43.456 --> 00:34:44.833
So it's more than a chance.

709
00:34:44.916 --> 00:34:47.418
- You... you did forget?
- Yes.

710
00:34:48.003 --> 00:34:50.756
Okay, so what do we do now?

711
00:34:50.839 --> 00:34:53.800
Is it another deck you have?
Is it in the board?

712
00:34:53.884 --> 00:34:55.135
No.

713
00:34:55.218 --> 00:34:58.639
- So we'll have to do it again.
- Okay.

714
00:34:59.222 --> 00:35:01.224
Okay? It's okay with you?

715
00:35:01.307 --> 00:35:03.685
If it's okay with you to do it again.

716
00:35:03.769 --> 00:35:06.187
- That's where we are right now, huh?
- Okay.

717
00:35:06.271 --> 00:35:07.522
Let's just go again.

718
00:35:10.275 --> 00:35:14.112
Courtney, there was an issue
on the subwoofer.

719
00:35:14.195 --> 00:35:15.571
It was a bit tinny.

720
00:35:15.656 --> 00:35:18.283
We adjusted that,
and we're ready for you this time.

721
00:35:18.366 --> 00:35:22.162
I'm sorry. On us, not you.
Just one more time.

722
00:35:22.245 --> 00:35:25.581
We're gonna keep our eyes
on the road. Okay?

723
00:35:25.666 --> 00:35:26.917
You got it.

724
00:35:27.000 --> 00:35:29.753
Please promise me
it's as good as your first one.

725
00:35:29.836 --> 00:35:31.963
I'm... Ha!

726
00:35:32.047 --> 00:35:34.800
You know... You know you can do that.
Okay. All right.

727
00:35:35.383 --> 00:35:36.802
Go get 'em, kiddo.

728
00:35:41.181 --> 00:35:45.769
♪ Once in a while
You find someone ♪

729
00:35:46.978 --> 00:35:53.902
♪ I dream of
At nights when I'm all alone ♪

730
00:35:54.820 --> 00:36:00.450
♪ You make it feel like home ♪

731
00:36:02.744 --> 00:36:07.666
I am so happy we had another take,
because that just killed me.

732
00:36:07.749 --> 00:36:09.751
It was so on the money.

733
00:36:09.835 --> 00:36:12.879
You were hitting notes
I didn't know were invented yet.

734
00:36:12.963 --> 00:36:16.091
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I'm gonna take a listen.

735
00:36:22.638 --> 00:36:24.557
God damn it!

736
00:36:26.476 --> 00:36:28.687
I should have known
you would never press the button.

737
00:36:28.770 --> 00:36:31.481
You didn't remember to put the button
on your goddamn overalls!

738
00:36:38.238 --> 00:36:39.698
Is everything okay out there?

739
00:36:40.406 --> 00:36:43.785
Yes, kiddo,
we are doing just fine. Um...

740
00:36:44.745 --> 00:36:47.831
We need to go one last time.
There was a glitch.

741
00:36:47.914 --> 00:36:53.669
There was a tremolo-treble-bass hiccup
that we have rectified,

742
00:36:53.754 --> 00:36:55.463
and we're ready for ya.

743
00:36:55.546 --> 00:36:58.925
Take three it is.
Three time's the charm. Ha!

744
00:36:59.009 --> 00:37:01.386
- Okay, kiddo, let's hit 'em.
- Okay.

745
00:37:03.513 --> 00:37:05.681
It's not rolling. It's not rolling.

746
00:37:06.516 --> 00:37:08.059
Press the button!

747
00:37:09.227 --> 00:37:13.314
Push it! It's spinning, right?!

748
00:37:13.398 --> 00:37:19.029
♪ Butterflies, butterflies
Down to my soul ♪

749
00:37:19.112 --> 00:37:22.824
♪ Butterfly, butterfly
You don't even know ♪

750
00:37:22.908 --> 00:37:29.330
I mean, it's... it's like a bird
and an angel and a saxophone

751
00:37:29.414 --> 00:37:31.666
- made love and had a baby.
- Oh, wow.

752
00:37:32.583 --> 00:37:38.799
I'm also hearing a triangle
just between all the choruses.

753
00:37:38.882 --> 00:37:40.550
How can you hear a shape?

754
00:37:40.633 --> 00:37:41.885
The instrument!

755
00:37:43.011 --> 00:37:44.012
Just...

756
00:37:44.095 --> 00:37:45.972
♪ Butterflies ♪

757
00:37:48.433 --> 00:37:50.185
♪ Butterflies ♪

758
00:37:51.561 --> 00:37:53.438
And then it would be perfect.

759
00:37:53.521 --> 00:37:55.816
Really? A triangle?

760
00:37:56.524 --> 00:37:57.943
You don't think that will sound corny?

761
00:37:58.026 --> 00:38:00.570
Way in the back. Just barely audible.

762
00:38:00.653 --> 00:38:05.909
♪ You make it feel like home ♪

763
00:38:17.003 --> 00:38:19.505
These guys get...

764
00:38:21.299 --> 00:38:25.095
Sandy, um, my dad wanted to make sure
that I said hi to you.

765
00:38:25.178 --> 00:38:26.596
- Your father, Marty?
- Yeah.

766
00:38:26.679 --> 00:38:29.557
Say hi for me.
He's a good man. A smart man.

767
00:38:29.640 --> 00:38:33.603
Um, he felt bad that you didn't get
into Hillcrest Country Club this year.

768
00:38:33.686 --> 00:38:38.024
Oh, listen, that's not his fault. I was...
That was fine. There's other clubs.

769
00:38:38.108 --> 00:38:41.027
No, actually I think
that his was the deciding vote.

770
00:38:41.111 --> 00:38:44.697
No. It's a capacity thing.
It's not his fault. It's...

771
00:38:44.780 --> 00:38:45.824
Let's do the meeting.

772
00:38:45.907 --> 00:38:48.368
- All right. We're glad you're here.
- Okay. Good.

773
00:38:48.451 --> 00:38:50.786
So anyway, now that we got
the formalities out of the way...

774
00:38:50.871 --> 00:38:53.706
Everybody got their Fruitopia?
Good, good, good.

775
00:38:53.789 --> 00:38:55.291
So, spoke to Barry.

776
00:38:55.375 --> 00:38:57.543
And, uh, Barry wanted us
to listen to your demo,

777
00:38:57.627 --> 00:38:59.754
and I gotta say, some good stuff there.

778
00:38:59.838 --> 00:39:00.839
Thank you.

779
00:39:00.922 --> 00:39:04.425
Just to... I mean, to me, no one's doing
what this kid is doing out there.

780
00:39:04.509 --> 00:39:06.761
It's... it's not Mariah.
It's not Whitney. It's...

781
00:39:06.845 --> 00:39:09.264
Well, listen, if she got the album sales
of Whitney, we'll take it.

782
00:39:09.347 --> 00:39:10.431
...Oh. Well, no,

783
00:39:10.515 --> 00:39:13.434
in terms of sound
and commerciability, absolutely.

784
00:39:13.518 --> 00:39:15.854
It's definitely Whitney.
It's a Whitney, 100%.

785
00:39:15.937 --> 00:39:17.480
- Yeah, it has potential.
- Well, hold on now.

786
00:39:17.563 --> 00:39:19.232
The production quality is complete shit.

787
00:39:19.315 --> 00:39:21.609
Complete shit. Terrible.

788
00:39:21.692 --> 00:39:25.321
But the song has potential.
Yeah, no diggity, no doubt.

789
00:39:25.405 --> 00:39:26.489
- Thank you.
- That's it.

790
00:39:26.572 --> 00:39:28.366
The song is all we're worried about.

791
00:39:28.449 --> 00:39:30.785
You gotta lose the corny triangle,
though, man.

792
00:39:32.037 --> 00:39:34.497
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, consider that gone.

793
00:39:34.580 --> 00:39:37.583
Let me ask you something, man.
Whose insane idea was that, anyway?

794
00:39:38.418 --> 00:39:40.628
Whose idea was it? Was it your idea?

795
00:39:40.711 --> 00:39:42.213
No, it was that...
It was the engineer's.

796
00:39:42.297 --> 00:39:45.300
I gotta be honest.
It was absolutely ridiculous.

797
00:39:45.383 --> 00:39:49.345
I mean, how big of an asshole
do you have to be to say,

798
00:39:49.429 --> 00:39:51.890
"You know what? Let's put a...

799
00:39:51.973 --> 00:39:54.100
...at the end of a ballad"?

800
00:39:56.561 --> 00:39:59.147
So, ready to check out our digs?

801
00:40:02.025 --> 00:40:04.235
This is Studio A.

802
00:40:05.236 --> 00:40:09.157
Les Paul helped engineer it,
and Sinatra made it infamous.

803
00:40:09.240 --> 00:40:12.160
I'm telling you,
this studio is all that...

804
00:40:12.243 --> 00:40:14.787
and a bag of chips.

805
00:40:15.413 --> 00:40:16.414
Yes.

806
00:40:18.874 --> 00:40:20.626
See this star here?

807
00:40:20.710 --> 00:40:24.047
This star marks the spot
with the best acoustics on the...

808
00:40:26.216 --> 00:40:27.550
Sandy?

809
00:40:27.633 --> 00:40:30.511
- How many of these things are there?
- We got a lot.

810
00:40:30.595 --> 00:40:33.139
- Can we talk about this star for a second?
- Yeah, go ahead.

811
00:40:33.223 --> 00:40:35.683
It's got the best acoustics
on the entire planet.

812
00:40:35.766 --> 00:40:37.643
- You good, Sandy?
- Comfortable.

813
00:40:38.853 --> 00:40:40.105
- Could I?
- Right there.

814
00:40:58.206 --> 00:41:00.125
What the hell?
Why the lights out?

815
00:41:00.208 --> 00:41:02.835
Electric bill?
Did you guys pay it this month?

816
00:41:02.918 --> 00:41:05.338
No, he's leaning on the light switch.

817
00:41:05.421 --> 00:41:06.756
No, I'm not.

818
00:41:06.839 --> 00:41:08.883
- Can you step aside, Sandy?
- Sure.

819
00:41:11.136 --> 00:41:13.888
What? That wasn't me. Wasn't me.

820
00:41:13.972 --> 00:41:15.598
...Let's try this again.

821
00:41:17.808 --> 00:41:18.977
From the top.

822
00:41:23.689 --> 00:41:25.733
Sandy, step away from the light switch.

823
00:41:25.816 --> 00:41:28.694
I did it on purpose that time.
A joke.

824
00:41:28.778 --> 00:41:31.489
I can't make jokes, guys?
Come on.

825
00:41:31.572 --> 00:41:35.660
Come on. If we're gonna do business,
we gotta realize it's fun, too.

826
00:41:35.743 --> 00:41:39.455
Ha. Ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha.
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Sandy.

827
00:41:39.539 --> 00:41:41.207
Ha-ha-ha-ha. Sandy.

828
00:41:44.627 --> 00:41:47.047
♪ Last night I had a dream ♪

829
00:41:47.130 --> 00:41:48.964
♪ When I was 17 ♪

830
00:41:49.049 --> 00:41:51.259
♪ I was in love with you ♪

831
00:41:51.342 --> 00:41:53.553
♪ And you were so in love with me ♪

832
00:41:53.636 --> 00:41:57.098
- Yo, man, this girl can sing.
- I told you.

833
00:41:57.182 --> 00:42:00.143
♪ You got down on bended knee
Said you wanna marry me ♪

834
00:42:00.226 --> 00:42:03.104
♪ Or was that just a fantasy ♪

835
00:42:03.188 --> 00:42:07.108
♪ All I know is what I know ♪

836
00:42:07.192 --> 00:42:11.946
♪ And when I wanna be
Is living in a dream ♪

837
00:42:12.030 --> 00:42:16.617
♪ We still fall in love
Forever ♪

838
00:42:16.701 --> 00:42:19.787
She got anyone?
'Cause I think she's my type.

839
00:42:19.870 --> 00:42:21.206
What are you doing here?

840
00:42:21.289 --> 00:42:23.458
Why are we worried
about her marital status?

841
00:42:23.541 --> 00:42:25.418
Shouldn't you be
preparing your rap, Mase?

842
00:42:25.501 --> 00:42:27.087
We're gonna get to it.

843
00:42:27.170 --> 00:42:29.714
Old man, we're gonna get to all of it.

844
00:42:29.797 --> 00:42:31.424
"Old man"? I ain't that old.

845
00:42:31.507 --> 00:42:34.635
♪ Last night I had a dream
That you were here with me ♪

846
00:42:34.719 --> 00:42:36.804
♪ And we were in a tree ♪

847
00:42:36.887 --> 00:42:38.806
♪ K-I-S-S-I-N-G ♪

848
00:42:38.889 --> 00:42:41.517
♪ I love him
I need him so ♪

849
00:42:41.601 --> 00:42:43.394
Come on. Come on. Come on.

850
00:42:44.270 --> 00:42:46.064
♪ I'll kiss you on your neck, yes ♪

851
00:42:46.147 --> 00:42:48.274
♪ Then you can say
you had the best, yes ♪

852
00:42:48.358 --> 00:42:50.693
♪ As I give you the game
Eyes of champagne ♪

853
00:42:50.776 --> 00:42:52.903
♪ Blowin' on the jet
Call it hydroplane ♪

854
00:42:54.072 --> 00:42:55.740
He doesn't have his own microphone?

855
00:42:55.823 --> 00:42:57.742
No, no, check it out.

856
00:42:57.825 --> 00:43:01.246
♪ Mr. DJ ♪

857
00:43:02.413 --> 00:43:06.709
♪ Take me to a time when he
Was still in love with me ♪

858
00:43:06.792 --> 00:43:09.420
♪ Mr. DJ ♪

859
00:43:09.504 --> 00:43:11.256
♪ Please send me a dream ♪

860
00:43:11.339 --> 00:43:14.717
♪ Put my finger in a ring
And gave his... ♪

861
00:43:17.345 --> 00:43:20.973
Every song is incredible.
That album is gonna be massive.

862
00:43:21.056 --> 00:43:23.518
So Babyface produced it?
Like the Babyface?

863
00:43:23.601 --> 00:43:25.145
Like, the guy with the face of a baby?

864
00:43:25.228 --> 00:43:28.481
He has a very childlike face, it's true.

865
00:43:28.564 --> 00:43:30.483
It's so good for women, so strong.

866
00:43:30.566 --> 00:43:34.028
It's like Emmylou Harris, if she was
raised in Neil Young's tour van

867
00:43:34.112 --> 00:43:37.532
and doing blow with Iggy Pop
and Etta James in a Mississippi bayou.

868
00:43:37.615 --> 00:43:39.617
Wow. Thanks, I think?

869
00:43:39.700 --> 00:43:42.120
She doesn't understand how good that is?

870
00:43:42.203 --> 00:43:45.248
No, I do. I'm just grateful
you all actually just listened to it.

871
00:43:45.331 --> 00:43:47.667
That's what we do. It's our ritual.

872
00:43:47.750 --> 00:43:51.045
Whenever anybody at Wexler Artists
completes a project,

873
00:43:51.129 --> 00:43:53.047
- we gather together.
- We do?

874
00:43:53.131 --> 00:43:56.091
We didn't even know
you had other clients until today.

875
00:43:56.176 --> 00:43:58.511
Oh, you guys all knew about each other.

876
00:43:58.594 --> 00:43:59.595
I knew you had other clients,

877
00:43:59.679 --> 00:44:01.639
but you told me I was
in a different league from them.

878
00:44:01.722 --> 00:44:04.309
That's what the prick told us, too.

879
00:44:04.392 --> 00:44:06.101
Sorry, we've never done
the ritual before.

880
00:44:06.186 --> 00:44:08.688
If it's a first time, Sandy,
how can it be a ritual?

881
00:44:08.771 --> 00:44:10.565
Okay, and who is that guy?

882
00:44:10.648 --> 00:44:13.401
Can we put him in a drawer or something?
That's horrifying.

883
00:44:13.484 --> 00:44:16.237
Sandy, aren't you forgetting
the best part of the ritual?

884
00:44:16.321 --> 00:44:18.823
- What's that, dear?
- Jumping in the pool.

885
00:44:18.906 --> 00:44:20.741
- Yeah! Let's do it!
- Oh, no, no, no, no!

886
00:44:20.825 --> 00:44:22.660
No, that's not part of the ritual!

887
00:44:24.119 --> 00:44:27.582
No, no, no, wait!
We are not permitted in the pool! Okay?

888
00:44:27.665 --> 00:44:30.626
- Firuz forbids it.
- You're not in a cult, are you, Sandy?

889
00:44:30.710 --> 00:44:32.420
No, Firuz is my landlord.

890
00:44:32.503 --> 00:44:35.840
He does not allow us in the pool.
It is forbidden.

891
00:44:35.923 --> 00:44:37.091
No, no. All right!

892
00:44:37.175 --> 00:44:40.553
Ah! Don't you come any closer, Sandy.
I'll put my whole foot in, I swear.

893
00:44:40.636 --> 00:44:41.929
No, no!

894
00:44:42.012 --> 00:44:43.889
- Please don't... No!
- Ooh!

895
00:44:43.973 --> 00:44:46.767
No, I am not kidding you, Courtney.
I will let you go as a client.

896
00:44:46.851 --> 00:44:48.644
- I didn't wanna have to say that.
- Oh, my God.

897
00:44:48.728 --> 00:44:51.021
Do not put your foot in the pool,
or the career is done.

898
00:44:51.105 --> 00:44:52.523
And I'm not... I'm not messing with you.

899
00:44:52.607 --> 00:44:54.359
- Oh, God.
- I don't care what you're saying.

900
00:44:54.442 --> 00:44:56.068
Whoa!

901
00:44:56.151 --> 00:44:58.195
Okay, you did it! You did it!
You did the foot.

902
00:44:58.279 --> 00:44:59.822
You did the foot. The foot is wet.

903
00:44:59.905 --> 00:45:03.451
Please come back in the house.
I'm asking nicely.

904
00:45:03.534 --> 00:45:05.620
I just don't have... I can't...

905
00:45:05.703 --> 00:45:07.663
I wasn't gonna go in.

906
00:45:07.747 --> 00:45:09.790
I know you weren't gonna go in.

907
00:45:09.874 --> 00:45:11.917
I... I can't joke, too?

908
00:45:12.001 --> 00:45:14.044
- Really? "I know you won't."
- I can't joke, too.

909
00:45:14.128 --> 00:45:16.464
Whoo! Cannonball!

910
00:45:16.547 --> 00:45:17.673
Whoo!

911
00:45:37.985 --> 00:45:40.363
Maybe tomorrow. Maybe tomorrow, okay?

912
00:45:40.446 --> 00:45:41.656
Maybe I'll wear you tomorrow.

913
00:45:41.739 --> 00:45:43.616
And... and it's not you guys.
You're doing great.

914
00:45:43.699 --> 00:45:45.785
I love you guys.
I love you guys, all right?

915
00:45:45.868 --> 00:45:47.703
Good night. Good night, everybody.

916
00:45:47.787 --> 00:45:48.954
Good night.

917
00:45:50.290 --> 00:45:54.627
♪ Once in a while
You find someone ♪

918
00:45:55.670 --> 00:46:00.466
♪ Right from the start
Your heart is done ♪

919
00:46:01.551 --> 00:46:03.010
♪ Feels something like... ♪

920
00:46:03.093 --> 00:46:05.680
- Sandy?
- Who's that?

921
00:46:05.763 --> 00:46:07.432
Don't "who's that" me, man.

922
00:46:07.515 --> 00:46:09.224
Why do you screw Firuz?

923
00:46:09.309 --> 00:46:11.602
- Firuz?
- Yes.

924
00:46:11.686 --> 00:46:14.397
I don't see you.
Show your face!

925
00:46:14.480 --> 00:46:16.649
I'm in Tehran, you imbecile.

926
00:46:16.732 --> 00:46:19.360
I tell you to stay out of my pool,
and what do you do?

927
00:46:19.444 --> 00:46:21.111
You go in my pool.

928
00:46:21.195 --> 00:46:24.657
Uh, nobody went in your pool.
No, no, who told you that? The dogs?

929
00:46:24.740 --> 00:46:28.661
I have cameras everywhere, man.
I'm watching you all the time.

930
00:46:28.744 --> 00:46:31.456
You're much better
than anything we have on Iranian TV.

931
00:46:31.539 --> 00:46:33.499
I see you with bacon over the sink,

932
00:46:33.583 --> 00:46:36.461
I see you fall asleep in my chair,
watching my Cinemax.

933
00:46:36.544 --> 00:46:38.379
And I see your godless friends
in my pool!

934
00:46:38.463 --> 00:46:40.965
No, no, listen, Firuz.
Here's what happened.

935
00:46:41.048 --> 00:46:43.468
There was an earthquake in Los Angeles.

936
00:46:43.551 --> 00:46:47.347
So we just went in the pool
'cause it's the safest place to be.

937
00:46:47.430 --> 00:46:50.600
But we didn't go all the way in.
No water was touched.

938
00:46:50.683 --> 00:46:53.561
Sandy, you lie all the time, man.
It's embarrassing.

939
00:46:53.644 --> 00:46:56.105
I wish I was lying. I wish I was.

940
00:46:56.188 --> 00:46:58.941
And how many times are you going to
listen to that one song, my friend?

941
00:46:59.024 --> 00:47:01.318
I mean, mix in a little
Miami Sound Machine or something.

942
00:47:01.402 --> 00:47:03.237
It's a client of mine. Courtney Clarke.

943
00:47:03.320 --> 00:47:04.530
What, you don't like it?

944
00:47:04.614 --> 00:47:07.032
The song is good, and I like her, too.

945
00:47:07.116 --> 00:47:09.994
You know, when she was in bathroom,
I got quite a good look at her.

946
00:47:10.077 --> 00:47:11.871
- You what?
- Firuz joking.

947
00:47:11.954 --> 00:47:14.374
I don't have cameras
in bathroom anymore.

948
00:47:14.457 --> 00:47:16.376
I had them taken out
when you had the big hemorrhoid.

949
00:47:16.459 --> 00:47:19.211
That wasn't a hemorrhoid,
that was a fissure.

950
00:47:19.294 --> 00:47:22.882
But, Sandy, people in my pool,
this I do not like!

951
00:47:22.965 --> 00:47:24.675
- I...
- That's strike one, Sandy!

952
00:47:24.759 --> 00:47:25.843
I'm telling you...

953
00:47:25.926 --> 00:47:28.846
- You don't want to get strike two.
- I... I agree.

954
00:47:28.929 --> 00:47:30.973
Goodbye from Firuz.

955
00:47:31.599 --> 00:47:32.767
Bye-bye.

956
00:47:36.812 --> 00:47:41.025
You know, I did tell them not to go
in the pool, and they did it anyway.

957
00:47:41.108 --> 00:47:42.985
- So you admit it?
- No! I...

958
00:47:43.068 --> 00:47:46.155
Strike two! Firuz knows everything.

959
00:47:50.117 --> 00:47:52.870
Okay, what are we doing today, big guy?

960
00:47:52.953 --> 00:47:56.040
We going to Jerry's?
Or you want to go to Carney's?

961
00:47:56.123 --> 00:47:57.458
I can go either one.

962
00:47:57.542 --> 00:48:01.128
It's all good for the Atkins.
I can get a frankfurter, no bun.

963
00:48:01.211 --> 00:48:03.338
- I know.
- I can get a plate of roast beef...

964
00:48:03.423 --> 00:48:05.049
- or corn beef...
- Don't go over the whole menu.

965
00:48:05.132 --> 00:48:06.592
I don't give a shit
about your roast beef.

966
00:48:06.676 --> 00:48:09.219
Stu Smiley passed on me
for the Young Comedians Special.

967
00:48:09.303 --> 00:48:10.805
- That's right. He...
- I don't even believe it.

968
00:48:10.888 --> 00:48:12.264
- He's a moron.
- He's not a moron.

969
00:48:12.347 --> 00:48:17.770
He's a pompous know-it-all,
smarmy little Ivy League pussy.

970
00:48:17.853 --> 00:48:22.817
- He went to San Diego State... actually.
- You're kidding me right now, right?

971
00:48:22.900 --> 00:48:24.694
You corrected me 'cause
he went to San Diego State?

972
00:48:24.777 --> 00:48:26.236
No, I'm agreeing with you.

973
00:48:26.320 --> 00:48:31.784
I'm saying you are too smart
and too topical to be on HBO.

974
00:48:31.867 --> 00:48:33.077
They like young and stupid.

975
00:48:33.160 --> 00:48:35.079
- They like cute and moronic.
- Yes.

976
00:48:35.162 --> 00:48:37.915
- Nothing challenging, nothing unfamiliar.
- No.

977
00:48:37.998 --> 00:48:40.876
- They want some, like, ex-Florida DJ...
- Ha!

978
00:48:40.960 --> 00:48:42.462
...who's blandly handsome,

979
00:48:42.545 --> 00:48:46.841
and his little gimmicks, his voice
cracks on the punch line or he's...

980
00:48:46.924 --> 00:48:48.551
Pretends to be tripping
on acid the whole set.

981
00:48:49.844 --> 00:48:51.178
Chinese food?

982
00:48:52.179 --> 00:48:53.639
I don't want Chinese food for lunch.

983
00:48:54.557 --> 00:48:56.058
All right, beef and broccoli.

984
00:48:56.141 --> 00:48:58.728
This conversation goes a lot better
when it's just me talking.

985
00:48:58.811 --> 00:49:01.564
- I'm not in the conversation?
- Oh, you are, but you aren't.

986
00:49:01.647 --> 00:49:05.485
You can let... Blast off on me.
Go ahead. Yell at me as much as you want.

987
00:49:05.568 --> 00:49:08.571
As long as you promise to bring it
on the stage with you tonight,

988
00:49:08.654 --> 00:49:10.072
- and you show HBO...
- I promise.

989
00:49:10.155 --> 00:49:11.741
...they don't need to discover you.

990
00:49:11.824 --> 00:49:14.952
Kevin Connors will discover himself.
Thank you very much.

991
00:49:15.035 --> 00:49:18.455
What does that even mean?
How do I discover myself?

992
00:49:18.539 --> 00:49:20.583
Do you know how dumb that sounds?

993
00:49:20.666 --> 00:49:23.794
That's one of the... Don't click.
Why're you clicking? Stop clicking!

994
00:49:23.878 --> 00:49:26.380
You always click whenever
you get nervous. It's psychotic.

995
00:49:26.463 --> 00:49:27.882
Your technique...

996
00:49:27.965 --> 00:49:29.091
What is that?

997
00:49:29.174 --> 00:49:31.468
It's, uh... That's Courtney's song.

998
00:49:31.552 --> 00:49:33.721
That's... Ask her what station it is.

999
00:49:33.804 --> 00:49:35.598
What station is it?

1000
00:49:35.681 --> 00:49:38.142
Excuse me, miss? Oh, wow. Hi.

1001
00:49:38.225 --> 00:49:40.227
Oh, my God, I know you.

1002
00:49:40.310 --> 00:49:41.395
- She knows me.
- Hey. Yeah.

1003
00:49:41.478 --> 00:49:44.148
Didn't you get one star
on Star Search the other day?

1004
00:49:44.231 --> 00:49:45.858
No.

1005
00:49:45.941 --> 00:49:48.110
This... What station are
you listening to? The number?

1006
00:49:48.193 --> 00:49:50.320
- What?
- The station you're listening to?

1007
00:49:50.404 --> 00:49:52.782
You need to enunciate.
I can't understand what you are saying.

1008
00:49:52.865 --> 00:49:54.700
No, no, what is the dial number?

1009
00:49:54.784 --> 00:49:56.493
What are you tripping about, bro?

1010
00:49:56.577 --> 00:49:59.622
I'm asking you
what station you're listening to!

1011
00:49:59.705 --> 00:50:01.582
Don't you... What are you...

1012
00:50:01.666 --> 00:50:03.208
Good job. You scared her off.

1013
00:50:03.292 --> 00:50:05.294
Oh, come on here.

1014
00:50:05.377 --> 00:50:06.754
It's your Uncle Joe Benson...

1015
00:50:09.173 --> 00:50:11.383
There it is. There it is!

1016
00:50:12.552 --> 00:50:14.386
This is Courtney's song.

1017
00:50:15.345 --> 00:50:17.014
What are you shocked by?
She's a great singer.

1018
00:50:17.097 --> 00:50:18.140
Oh, my God.

1019
00:50:18.223 --> 00:50:21.018
♪ And we were in a tree
K-I-S-S-I-N-G ♪

1020
00:50:23.020 --> 00:50:24.271
What the hell, Sandy?

1021
00:50:25.815 --> 00:50:27.608
You can take care of this, right?

1022
00:50:27.692 --> 00:50:29.819
My Nautilus place is right here.
I'm gonna go do a circuit.

1023
00:50:31.070 --> 00:50:33.155
How about this song? Huh, guys?

1024
00:50:35.157 --> 00:50:39.244
I got Integrity No-Fault Insurance.
How about you?

1025
00:50:43.498 --> 00:50:44.625
The song... This song...

1026
00:50:45.375 --> 00:50:46.376
Ha...

1027
00:51:15.364 --> 00:51:16.490
Hey, hey.

1028
00:51:27.459 --> 00:51:29.419
You look like a star.

1029
00:51:30.004 --> 00:51:31.338
Thank you!

1030
00:51:31.421 --> 00:51:33.966
You look like Mike Tyson
knocked you out.

1031
00:51:34.049 --> 00:51:35.342
What happened?

1032
00:51:35.425 --> 00:51:38.470
Oh, I ran into a moose on Melrose.

1033
00:51:38.553 --> 00:51:42.182
Yeah, it must have escaped
off the Paramount lot.

1034
00:51:42.808 --> 00:51:46.896
- This dress on you...
- I just love it.

1035
00:51:46.979 --> 00:51:50.816
Of course you do. It's from
your dirty magazine page, ya weirdo.

1036
00:51:54.153 --> 00:51:55.487
Well, it works!

1037
00:51:55.570 --> 00:51:58.699
What are we doing tonight to celebrate?
You were on the radio!

1038
00:51:58.783 --> 00:52:00.868
Hmm. Well, Bling just called,

1039
00:52:00.951 --> 00:52:05.080
and Quincy Jones invited me
to his party tonight.

1040
00:52:05.164 --> 00:52:08.918
- Jonesy? Jonesy's having a party?
- Okay. Uh-huh.

1041
00:52:09.001 --> 00:52:10.335
I heard he was gonna have a...

1042
00:52:10.419 --> 00:52:11.921
- I just didn't know when.
- Oh.

1043
00:52:12.004 --> 00:52:14.006
So what?
Did you get a plus-one or...

1044
00:52:14.089 --> 00:52:15.507
Yes, plus-one.

1045
00:52:16.258 --> 00:52:18.135
- And I'm the one?
- Yeah.

1046
00:52:18.218 --> 00:52:22.181
You know, I met his grandmother
years ago at a Hamburger Hamlet.

1047
00:52:22.264 --> 00:52:24.433
She calls him Quincelius.

1048
00:52:24.516 --> 00:52:27.144
So every time I see him,
I say, "Hi, Quincelius."

1049
00:52:27.227 --> 00:52:28.979
He gives me a look like,
"How did he know?"

1050
00:52:29.063 --> 00:52:32.399
Okay, cool.
So should we go to the party?

1051
00:52:32.482 --> 00:52:34.985
You wanna go to it?
Why shouldn't... Let's pop by.

1052
00:52:35.069 --> 00:52:36.403
He lives in Venice, right?

1053
00:52:36.486 --> 00:52:38.613
Uh... no, the address is in Bel Air.

1054
00:52:38.698 --> 00:52:41.867
Oh, so he moved? Okay, okay, he moved.

1055
00:52:55.547 --> 00:52:57.842
Sandy Wexler. Wow.

1056
00:52:57.925 --> 00:52:59.468
They let you in this party?

1057
00:52:59.551 --> 00:53:00.803
Hey, Bronstein.

1058
00:53:00.886 --> 00:53:02.847
You heard you didn't get into
Hillcrest Country Club, right?

1059
00:53:02.930 --> 00:53:04.014
Yeah, I heard.

1060
00:53:04.098 --> 00:53:06.809
This place is incredible!

1061
00:53:06.892 --> 00:53:09.019
Yeah, it's nice. It's nice.

1062
00:53:09.103 --> 00:53:11.438
His one in Venice wasn't trying as hard.

1063
00:53:12.314 --> 00:53:14.649
Quincy never lived in Venice.
What you talking about, Willis?

1064
00:53:14.734 --> 00:53:16.360
What? No, she said he did.

1065
00:53:16.443 --> 00:53:19.321
- What?
- She? Oh!

1066
00:53:19.404 --> 00:53:20.990
I'm a huge fan. I'm Arsenio.

1067
00:53:21.656 --> 00:53:24.576
I know, Arsenio. Courtney.

1068
00:53:24.659 --> 00:53:29.289
Hey, Arsenio. Good to see you.
I'm Sandy Wexler, her manager.

1069
00:53:29.373 --> 00:53:32.459
You remember? We met at, uh...
at Bernie's beach house.

1070
00:53:32.542 --> 00:53:35.337
Your manager look like he fell down
an elevator shaft. What's up?

1071
00:53:35.420 --> 00:53:39.341
No, no, no. I, uh... Fender bender.
You should see the other guy.

1072
00:53:39.424 --> 00:53:41.593
- Oh, he got hurt?
- Who did?

1073
00:53:41.676 --> 00:53:44.054
- The other guy?
- What? No.

1074
00:53:45.765 --> 00:53:48.183
You know what?
I heard your new song, "Mr. DJ."

1075
00:53:48.267 --> 00:53:50.644
I love it. It's off the chain.
You've gotta come on the show and do it.

1076
00:53:50.727 --> 00:53:52.479
- I would love to.
- Oh, well, listen.

1077
00:53:52.562 --> 00:53:55.024
I got a call from Johnny Carson
today, actually.

1078
00:53:55.107 --> 00:53:59.694
He heard the song as well on the radio,
and he booked her on the show next week.

1079
00:53:59.779 --> 00:54:01.030
Carson?

1080
00:54:02.197 --> 00:54:03.407
Well, congratulations.

1081
00:54:03.490 --> 00:54:07.119
You ever need me, Stage 29.
I'll be there forever, baby.

1082
00:54:07.202 --> 00:54:10.622
Ah, thanks, Arsenio.
No, I didn't mean any problem...

1083
00:54:10.705 --> 00:54:13.375
You didn't tell me
I was doing Carson next week!

1084
00:54:13.458 --> 00:54:17.087
That was a negotiation ploy.
I may have overplayed my hand there.

1085
00:54:17.171 --> 00:54:18.755
Carson retired two years ago.

1086
00:54:18.839 --> 00:54:21.050
Sandy Wexler?
Somebody hide the pastrami.

1087
00:54:22.384 --> 00:54:24.219
Hey, thank you. Good to see you, too.

1088
00:54:25.846 --> 00:54:29.224
Wow. Look at all these awards he has.

1089
00:54:29.308 --> 00:54:30.684
You'll have more one day.

1090
00:54:30.767 --> 00:54:32.769
- Me?
- Yes, you.

1091
00:54:32.853 --> 00:54:33.979
You promise me this.

1092
00:54:34.063 --> 00:54:36.523
- After you win your first Grammy...
- Uh-huh.

1093
00:54:36.606 --> 00:54:40.485
...you go home that night, you
put your ugly duckling hat on...

1094
00:54:40.569 --> 00:54:41.695
I am not putting that hat on.

1095
00:54:41.778 --> 00:54:43.363
...to remind yourself
where you come from.

1096
00:54:43.447 --> 00:54:46.658
- You put it on. I'm not putting it on.
- You don't wanna see me in that...

1097
00:54:46.741 --> 00:54:48.869
Sandy, Sandy, Sandy.

1098
00:54:49.453 --> 00:54:51.413
Well, who whooped your ass
and got away with it?

1099
00:54:51.496 --> 00:54:56.501
No, this was a high-impact
Tae Bo class I took. It's fine.

1100
00:54:56.585 --> 00:54:57.586
Okay.

1101
00:54:57.669 --> 00:55:00.714
How about our girl here
getting the radio play, huh?

1102
00:55:00.797 --> 00:55:02.757
Did I tell you she's
a superstar or what?

1103
00:55:02.842 --> 00:55:04.468
Oh, yeah, she's getting some heat.

1104
00:55:04.551 --> 00:55:06.803
- Yeah, we'll see where it goes.
- Thanks, Bling.

1105
00:55:06.887 --> 00:55:11.433
Excuse me. Excuse me, Shortie Doo-Wop,
can I get two Zimas and for Sandy...

1106
00:55:11.516 --> 00:55:13.435
I'll take a diet ginger ale.

1107
00:55:13.518 --> 00:55:16.563
- Amy Baskin.
- Sandy, what are you doing here?

1108
00:55:16.646 --> 00:55:19.859
I was invited.
Thank you very much. Hi.

1109
00:55:20.567 --> 00:55:22.736
Bling, I want you to meet Amy Baskin.

1110
00:55:22.819 --> 00:55:25.572
To me, she is the next Grace Kelly.

1111
00:55:25.655 --> 00:55:28.242
- I'm trying.
- Amy? Courtney.

1112
00:55:28.325 --> 00:55:29.743
Remember me from the ritual pool party?

1113
00:55:29.826 --> 00:55:32.872
Oh, my God. I heard your song
on the radio twice today.

1114
00:55:32.955 --> 00:55:36.000
- Congratulations, Courtney.
- Oh, well, we got a great manager.

1115
00:55:36.083 --> 00:55:38.585
He told me to always
sing from the heart.

1116
00:55:38.668 --> 00:55:41.171
And I tell this girl,
"Always act from the heart."

1117
00:55:41.255 --> 00:55:43.883
Hey, did we get the offer on
the Mentos commercial I was on hold for?

1118
00:55:43.966 --> 00:55:47.719
No, you weren't on hold for it.
What I said was,

1119
00:55:47.802 --> 00:55:51.598
"I called them and they put me on hold
for about 45 minutes."

1120
00:55:51.681 --> 00:55:55.185
But when they... they got on the phone,
they told me they passed on you.

1121
00:55:56.353 --> 00:55:57.938
- Well, there you go.
- No, it's good.

1122
00:55:58.022 --> 00:55:59.523
They said she had a great reading.

1123
00:55:59.606 --> 00:56:02.026
That it truly looked like
she loved the Mentos.

1124
00:56:02.859 --> 00:56:04.111
I'll be back with your drinks.

1125
00:56:04.194 --> 00:56:05.195
- Okay.
- Okay.

1126
00:56:05.279 --> 00:56:08.573
Yo, check it out. It's OJ Simpson,
Phil Spector and Robert Blake.

1127
00:56:08.657 --> 00:56:11.493
Good guys.
Call 'em the dream team.

1128
00:56:11.576 --> 00:56:13.162
- I'm gonna go chop it up with 'em.
- All right.

1129
00:56:13.245 --> 00:56:16.123
The juice is on the loose!
What's happening, killer?

1130
00:56:16.706 --> 00:56:20.252
So, uh, what do you think?
We've been to the party. We had fun.

1131
00:56:20.335 --> 00:56:22.879
- Time to go?
- I wanna see Jonesy.

1132
00:56:22.963 --> 00:56:25.299
- Who's Jonesy?
- Quincy?

1133
00:56:25.382 --> 00:56:27.927
- Oh, Quincy? You wanna see, uh...
- Yeah.

1134
00:56:28.010 --> 00:56:29.386
...Quincelius?

1135
00:56:29.469 --> 00:56:30.887
All right. Let's get that done.

1136
00:56:30.971 --> 00:56:33.307
- You think he's around?
- Yeah, it'll be good to see him again.

1137
00:56:34.099 --> 00:56:35.434
Uh, yeah, let's find him.

1138
00:56:36.143 --> 00:56:40.981
Okay, now, Courtney,
it's Domaines Ott Bandol Rosé.

1139
00:56:41.065 --> 00:56:42.316
- My favorite.
- Mmm.

1140
00:56:48.989 --> 00:56:50.324
What do you think?

1141
00:56:50.407 --> 00:56:53.202
Mmm! This is so good, Mr. Jones.

1142
00:56:53.285 --> 00:56:55.037
What do you think, Sandy?
You like it?

1143
00:56:56.580 --> 00:56:57.998
What's the matter, man?

1144
00:56:58.082 --> 00:57:00.125
Nothing. No, I think it's good.

1145
00:57:00.209 --> 00:57:02.502
It's... it's... It's just grapey.

1146
00:57:03.337 --> 00:57:07.716
- What do you mean "grapey"?
- Oh, I... I didn't say it was a bad thing.

1147
00:57:08.717 --> 00:57:11.178
Okay. I'm gonna try
to respect your opinion, brother.

1148
00:57:11.761 --> 00:57:15.515
Let me try another one. I've got
a '61 Château Pétrus downstairs.

1149
00:57:15.599 --> 00:57:16.725
Okay.

1150
00:57:16.808 --> 00:57:19.519
I paid eight grand for it
at the Côte de Nuits.

1151
00:57:19.603 --> 00:57:21.396
- Yeah, okay.
- That's too much. No.

1152
00:57:21.480 --> 00:57:23.690
Pretty sure this'll get your attention.

1153
00:57:23.773 --> 00:57:25.400
Thank you, Quincelius.

1154
00:57:25.484 --> 00:57:26.901
Who the hell is Quincelius?

1155
00:57:27.819 --> 00:57:30.155
Nobody. Come on. What are we doing here?

1156
00:57:33.075 --> 00:57:34.659
Thank you.

1157
00:57:34.743 --> 00:57:36.954
It was grapey. It was a little grapey.

1158
00:57:37.037 --> 00:57:40.624
- I think you offended him.
- No, I didn't.

1159
00:57:40.707 --> 00:57:42.251
I thought it was cool.

1160
00:57:43.293 --> 00:57:47.256
When he comes back, I dare you
to say you hate that one, too.

1161
00:57:47.339 --> 00:57:48.507
What?

1162
00:57:48.590 --> 00:57:51.843
The man spent $8,000 on the wine.
He'll kill me.

1163
00:57:51.926 --> 00:57:54.638
Oh, we'll laugh our asses off. Come on.

1164
00:57:54.721 --> 00:57:59.393
- Courtney, what do you got me doing here?
- I was saving this for a special occasion.

1165
00:57:59.476 --> 00:58:01.270
I think this is special enough.

1166
00:58:03.438 --> 00:58:05.732
You'll have to let me know
what you think, baby.

1167
00:58:05.815 --> 00:58:07.567
Yeah. Thank you.

1168
00:58:08.818 --> 00:58:09.944
Very much.

1169
00:58:11.405 --> 00:58:13.032
What do you think, honey?

1170
00:58:13.115 --> 00:58:16.326
Mr. Jones, this is exquisite.

1171
00:58:16.410 --> 00:58:18.037
And, Sanford, you likey?

1172
00:58:23.333 --> 00:58:25.919
- Honestly?
- What else, man?

1173
00:58:27.462 --> 00:58:30.090
- It's a little nutty.
- Nutty?

1174
00:58:31.341 --> 00:58:32.842
For my taste.

1175
00:58:37.514 --> 00:58:40.017
Maybe if you put an ice cube in it...

1176
00:58:40.100 --> 00:58:44.813
- Oh, my goodness.
- Get out of my house!

1177
00:58:44.896 --> 00:58:46.273
- Now!
- Hey, hey, I didn't mean to...

1178
00:58:48.400 --> 00:58:50.402
- Now! Out! Out!
- I'm gonna leave.

1179
00:58:50.485 --> 00:58:53.072
- No, I just got to get my jacket.
- Out! Get... get out of here.

1180
00:58:53.155 --> 00:58:54.781
- Listen.
- Out!

1181
00:58:54.864 --> 00:58:58.202
Man, one of these is mine.
Is this navy or black?

1182
00:58:58.285 --> 00:59:02.122
I'm having a hard time seeing.
My glasses are blurry from the wine toss.

1183
00:59:02.206 --> 00:59:03.373
Get out!

1184
00:59:03.457 --> 00:59:06.043
You know what? This is probably it.
I... I'm gonna go.

1185
00:59:06.126 --> 00:59:08.837
- Leave!
- Courtney! Okay.

1186
00:59:08.920 --> 00:59:12.049
Hey. Thank you, Q-bert.
It was a great night.

1187
00:59:12.132 --> 00:59:15.135
- Did you see the way that was...
- You made me do that! You!

1188
00:59:15.219 --> 00:59:16.511
- How are we getting out?
- Are you happy?

1189
00:59:16.595 --> 00:59:18.930
I don't know where...
Go. Just go. Is he coming?

1190
00:59:19.013 --> 00:59:22.892
Courtney's first single was huge.
I remember the album was even bigger.

1191
00:59:22.976 --> 00:59:25.937
I heard every song
on every station of every radio.

1192
00:59:30.650 --> 00:59:32.277
Yay, Courtney!

1193
00:59:34.529 --> 00:59:37.116
Courtney blew up
to Whitney Houston-type status.

1194
00:59:37.199 --> 00:59:38.200
Oh, really?

1195
00:59:38.283 --> 00:59:39.951
- So it was crazy.
- Mariah Carey, you know...

1196
00:59:44.331 --> 00:59:48.252
You're nobody, and then you're somebody,
and everyone's clamoring after you.

1197
00:59:48.335 --> 00:59:50.837
And it's scary. It can be scary.

1198
01:00:04.101 --> 01:00:06.520
- Sandy...
- Courtney, what's wrong?

1199
01:00:06.603 --> 01:00:08.813
I think someone's outside my house.

1200
01:00:08.897 --> 01:00:11.441
I'm scared it's one of those freaks
that's been calling me or something.

1201
01:00:11.525 --> 01:00:13.610
What? Who's calling you?

1202
01:00:13.693 --> 01:00:14.903
I don't know.

1203
01:00:14.986 --> 01:00:17.781
I've been dealing with this
ever since I moved into this place.

1204
01:00:17.864 --> 01:00:19.991
- Are your doors locked?
- Yeah.

1205
01:00:20.074 --> 01:00:22.244
You stay inside. I'll be right there.

1206
01:00:32.879 --> 01:00:34.589
You're in trouble now, tough guy!

1207
01:00:35.424 --> 01:00:38.427
Look what I've been carrying
around in my backseat...

1208
01:00:39.093 --> 01:00:42.139
ever since I was attacked
on Ventura Place.

1209
01:00:43.056 --> 01:00:45.434
Huh? You like this?

1210
01:00:46.143 --> 01:00:47.936
You wanna... You wanna feel it?

1211
01:00:49.604 --> 01:00:51.148
Come out! Where are you?

1212
01:00:52.316 --> 01:00:55.026
Courtney, stay in the house!

1213
01:00:58.363 --> 01:00:59.531
What's that?

1214
01:01:01.200 --> 01:01:03.285
What? You think you can hide?

1215
01:01:05.954 --> 01:01:09.541
Are you scared? Huh?

1216
01:01:09.624 --> 01:01:11.960
'Cause I'm scared, too.

1217
01:01:12.043 --> 01:01:15.380
I'm scared I'm gonna shatter
every bone in your face!

1218
01:01:22.346 --> 01:01:23.597
You're gone?

1219
01:01:25.474 --> 01:01:28.185
That's it. Truce.

1220
01:01:29.394 --> 01:01:30.395
No more.

1221
01:01:35.817 --> 01:01:37.194
Ow!

1222
01:01:41.615 --> 01:01:46.745
What you were so afraid of
was nothing but a raccoon.

1223
01:01:46.828 --> 01:01:47.829
No way.

1224
01:01:47.912 --> 01:01:51.208
I'm telling you, you'll never have to
worry about him again, though.

1225
01:01:51.916 --> 01:01:53.627
You didn't kill him, did you?

1226
01:01:54.503 --> 01:01:56.796
No. No. Uh, I...

1227
01:01:56.880 --> 01:02:01.134
I seen him go out into the forest again
to see his family, so...

1228
01:02:01.218 --> 01:02:02.886
All right? But I screamed at him.

1229
01:02:02.969 --> 01:02:06.306
I let him know, "Don't come back here.
You stay with the...

1230
01:02:07.474 --> 01:02:09.351
On your side of the fence."

1231
01:02:09.434 --> 01:02:11.270
Okay.

1232
01:02:11.353 --> 01:02:13.272
Come on in.
Let me wash those clothes.

1233
01:02:13.355 --> 01:02:17.401
When I used to represent Hooch
from Turner & Hooch,

1234
01:02:17.484 --> 01:02:21.738
I got a similar call
about a late-night trespasser.

1235
01:02:21.821 --> 01:02:24.449
Turned out it was Benji's trainer.

1236
01:02:24.533 --> 01:02:29.579
Uh, he was jealous that Hooch
was now the hottest dog in the business.

1237
01:02:29.663 --> 01:02:32.707
- You're making that up.
- No, no, no, I think that's true.

1238
01:02:32.791 --> 01:02:35.960
You're insane, Sandy.
Take off those pants.

1239
01:02:36.711 --> 01:02:39.298
What? What, right here?

1240
01:02:39.381 --> 01:02:40.424
I won't look.

1241
01:02:40.507 --> 01:02:42.592
Well, you'll be missing out, then.

1242
01:02:42.676 --> 01:02:44.344
Oh, really?

1243
01:02:45.011 --> 01:02:47.221
No. Maybe you should turn around.

1244
01:02:47.306 --> 01:02:49.766
Turning around.

1245
01:02:49.849 --> 01:02:52.852
I'm glad you took
this place, by the way.

1246
01:02:52.936 --> 01:02:54.688
The real estate lady told me

1247
01:02:54.771 --> 01:02:58.567
that David Crosby died
three times in this house.

1248
01:02:58.650 --> 01:03:00.902
I'm gonna keep the beeper,
if that's all right.

1249
01:03:00.985 --> 01:03:03.738
Kevin Connors did
a show on Brea tonight,

1250
01:03:03.822 --> 01:03:07.867
co-headlining with AJ Jamal.
I wanna make sure that went well.

1251
01:03:08.827 --> 01:03:11.204
So, pants are coming down.

1252
01:03:12.121 --> 01:03:13.373
Here you go.

1253
01:03:15.792 --> 01:03:18.337
All right. Come on.
Let's get these washed.

1254
01:03:18.920 --> 01:03:21.005
Sure. Hey, thanks for doing that.

1255
01:03:24.884 --> 01:03:26.470
You called Bling, too?

1256
01:03:26.553 --> 01:03:28.513
Oh, I was here anyway, Sandy.

1257
01:03:28.597 --> 01:03:30.474
With my pants on.

1258
01:03:35.144 --> 01:03:38.064
The important thing
is that Courtney feels safe.

1259
01:03:38.147 --> 01:03:40.066
- That's all I'm worried about.
- Hmm.

1260
01:03:40.149 --> 01:03:41.818
An unlisted phone number.

1261
01:03:41.901 --> 01:03:43.737
That's the way to go
for an artist of your stature.

1262
01:03:43.820 --> 01:03:45.780
I can get that done for you
tomorrow morning.

1263
01:03:45.864 --> 01:03:49.075
Oh, no, it's all... It's all good,
Sandy. I handled it already.

1264
01:03:49.158 --> 01:03:52.245
Oh, you did? Good. Good. Good for you.

1265
01:03:55.164 --> 01:03:57.125
Sandy, can you pass me the gravy?

1266
01:03:57.208 --> 01:04:00.712
Can I pass you the gravy?
Absolutely. I can pass you the gravy.

1267
01:04:00.795 --> 01:04:02.547
- Here. You want me to put it on for you?
- I got it.

1268
01:04:02.631 --> 01:04:03.923
- You got it?
- Yeah.

1269
01:04:04.007 --> 01:04:06.760
I was thinking we should get back
in the studio, Courtney.

1270
01:04:06.843 --> 01:04:09.262
Maybe noodle around with some new tunes.

1271
01:04:09.346 --> 01:04:11.973
With all due respect, Sandy,
I understand that,

1272
01:04:12.056 --> 01:04:15.268
but, uh, her existing record's
gonna be on the charts for months.

1273
01:04:15.352 --> 01:04:17.604
You don't want her competing
against herself now, do you?

1274
01:04:17.687 --> 01:04:21.733
Who else do you want her competing with?
I mean it's a win-win. To me.

1275
01:04:24.318 --> 01:04:25.570
I know what you mean, Sandy.

1276
01:04:25.654 --> 01:04:28.865
I have lots of ideas,
but I can't tomorrow.

1277
01:04:28.948 --> 01:04:31.075
We've got publicist meetings.

1278
01:04:31.159 --> 01:04:34.371
- Publicists? What... what publicists?
- Oh, yeah, just the top ones.

1279
01:04:34.454 --> 01:04:36.039
You know what?
I'll send you the list, actually.

1280
01:04:36.122 --> 01:04:38.708
You know what?
Better yet, I'll e-mail you the list.

1281
01:04:38.792 --> 01:04:41.545
- What is that?
- Oh, you're not familiar with e-mail?

1282
01:04:41.628 --> 01:04:45.382
E-mail? Of course I heard of that.
Which one are you talking about?

1283
01:04:45.465 --> 01:04:49.636
You got your computer, right?
And you plug that into your phone line,

1284
01:04:49.719 --> 01:04:55.434
and you could send a document to another
computer clear across the country

1285
01:04:55.517 --> 01:04:57.602
in a matter of minutes.

1286
01:04:57.686 --> 01:05:01.398
Who licks the envelope? R2-D2?
I'm lost right now.

1287
01:05:01.481 --> 01:05:04.150
Now I think we're making
a wrong move here.

1288
01:05:04.233 --> 01:05:08.321
I have a publicity campaign designed
strictly for this woman right here.

1289
01:05:08.405 --> 01:05:11.533
You have a publicity campaign? Well,
I mean, we're... The family's all here.

1290
01:05:11.616 --> 01:05:13.367
We would love to hear about it.
What is it?

1291
01:05:13.452 --> 01:05:15.870
Well, I usually like my clients
to start slow.

1292
01:05:15.954 --> 01:05:17.997
Keep it simple. Don't overexpose.

1293
01:05:19.332 --> 01:05:21.250
- Really, Sandy?
- Yes.

1294
01:05:21.334 --> 01:05:23.252
Just gonna spit your chicken on my face?
That's for you.

1295
01:05:24.337 --> 01:05:27.507
Okay. Maybe we'll hold off
on the publicist thing.

1296
01:05:27.591 --> 01:05:28.592
Thank you.

1297
01:05:28.675 --> 01:05:30.343
But then we'll bring in one soon.

1298
01:05:30.427 --> 01:05:32.053
- Okay, boys?
- We'll talk about that.

1299
01:05:32.136 --> 01:05:34.222
Absolutely. I think that's smart.

1300
01:05:34.305 --> 01:05:36.307
All right. I'm gonna go check
on these jeans.

1301
01:05:36.390 --> 01:05:38.309
- Okay?
- Yes, my queen.

1302
01:05:38.392 --> 01:05:39.728
Your queen?

1303
01:05:41.688 --> 01:05:46.150
Sandy, you are the reason
she needs a publicist.

1304
01:05:46.234 --> 01:05:47.611
I'm the reason?

1305
01:05:47.694 --> 01:05:50.489
You know how many calls I got after
Quincy Jones threw you out of his party?

1306
01:05:50.572 --> 01:05:54.451
- Oh... She dared me to do it.
- What are you, 14, Sandy?

1307
01:05:54.534 --> 01:05:56.911
No, I'm not 14. I'm not 14 at all.

1308
01:05:56.995 --> 01:05:58.412
Your job is to protect her.

1309
01:05:58.497 --> 01:06:00.499
I protect her 24/7!

1310
01:06:00.582 --> 01:06:03.167
And how is that?
By screwing up her shot on Arsenio?

1311
01:06:03.251 --> 01:06:04.794
We got the show, didn't we?

1312
01:06:04.878 --> 01:06:06.295
Because I fixed it!

1313
01:06:06.379 --> 01:06:09.423
You fixed it. You did everything.
You invented music.

1314
01:06:09.508 --> 01:06:10.759
What did you do, Sandy?

1315
01:06:10.842 --> 01:06:13.344
Did you file the paperwork for the Grammy
nomination before the deadline?

1316
01:06:13.427 --> 01:06:15.514
Did you squash the story in the Enquirer

1317
01:06:15.597 --> 01:06:18.933
about her corrections officer father
falling asleep during a prison riot?

1318
01:06:19.017 --> 01:06:21.060
Did you send envelopes of cash
to the radio stations

1319
01:06:21.144 --> 01:06:22.436
so they could play her record?

1320
01:06:23.437 --> 01:06:24.939
No, you didn't do that.

1321
01:06:25.023 --> 01:06:26.483
You know how I know
you didn't do it, Sandy?

1322
01:06:26.566 --> 01:06:28.442
Because I did it.
I did all those things.

1323
01:06:28.527 --> 01:06:31.112
And what did you do? Hmm?

1324
01:06:31.195 --> 01:06:35.116
You made sure Gary,
the daredevil trapeze artist,

1325
01:06:35.199 --> 01:06:38.036
was her opening act
at the Universal Amphitheatre.

1326
01:06:39.037 --> 01:06:40.038
Gary is family.

1327
01:06:40.121 --> 01:06:42.791
This dude shattered his pelvis
on an amplifier!

1328
01:06:42.874 --> 01:06:44.501
I was there. I saw.

1329
01:06:44.584 --> 01:06:46.460
There was blood
all over the first three rows!

1330
01:06:46.545 --> 01:06:48.505
- People were vomiting!
- Yeah, all right.

1331
01:06:48.588 --> 01:06:49.798
That doesn't really segue well

1332
01:06:49.881 --> 01:06:52.551
into soulful singer-songwriter now,
does it, Sandy?

1333
01:06:52.634 --> 01:06:55.011
She got 'em back.
She's too good to lose a crowd.

1334
01:06:55.094 --> 01:06:56.513
She's too good for you.

1335
01:06:57.388 --> 01:06:59.098
Sandy, she could have
any manager she wants.

1336
01:06:59.182 --> 01:07:00.266
She wants me!

1337
01:07:00.349 --> 01:07:02.519
And that is what's holding her back.

1338
01:07:04.270 --> 01:07:05.980
Look, Sandy, you did your job.

1339
01:07:06.856 --> 01:07:09.526
You brought her up to the big leagues.

1340
01:07:09.609 --> 01:07:12.070
I'm telling you. Come on!

1341
01:07:12.987 --> 01:07:15.824
But now you're just...
You're out of your depth.

1342
01:07:15.907 --> 01:07:18.284
Don't let your ego get in the way.

1343
01:07:18.993 --> 01:07:23.081
Can you look me in the eye and tell me
you're doing what's best for her?

1344
01:07:27.501 --> 01:07:28.753
- Okay.
- Ah!

1345
01:07:28.837 --> 01:07:31.255
Pants-Off Dance-Off
is officially canceled.

1346
01:07:31.339 --> 01:07:32.716
- Put these bad boys on.
- Okay.

1347
01:07:32.799 --> 01:07:36.803
You got the stain out?
Very nice. Look at you. Look at you.

1348
01:07:36.886 --> 01:07:40.264
Well, I'm beat to shit.
I'm gonna call it.

1349
01:07:40.849 --> 01:07:44.102
You're gonna call it?
All right. I'll walk you out, then.

1350
01:07:44.185 --> 01:07:47.689
Thank you for everything.
Appreciate it all.

1351
01:07:57.115 --> 01:07:59.993
Oh. Oh, yeah. Good night.

1352
01:08:11.630 --> 01:08:13.464
Thanks for scaring the stalker raccoon.

1353
01:08:13.547 --> 01:08:16.760
You don't have to thank me, Courtney.
That's my pleasure.

1354
01:08:16.843 --> 01:08:17.844
Look, Sandy...

1355
01:08:19.553 --> 01:08:21.347
This rock star thing is new to me.

1356
01:08:22.223 --> 01:08:24.558
I'm doing the best I can
to make everybody happy, you know.

1357
01:08:24.643 --> 01:08:28.897
You make the world happy, Courtney.
That's all you need to worry about.

1358
01:08:29.814 --> 01:08:30.899
Thank you, Sandy.

1359
01:08:31.608 --> 01:08:34.402
That's why it's difficult
for me to tell you this.

1360
01:08:34.485 --> 01:08:38.114
But where you are right now
in your career,

1361
01:08:38.197 --> 01:08:41.868
and what it requires of my time, it's...

1362
01:08:44.037 --> 01:08:48.708
I'm being kind of forced here
to make sacrifices that,

1363
01:08:48.792 --> 01:08:52.045
with good conscience,
I don't really wanna make.

1364
01:08:52.128 --> 01:08:53.587
Like what?

1365
01:08:53.672 --> 01:08:57.676
Like my stable of talent.

1366
01:08:57.759 --> 01:09:02.263
I can't give them what I believe
each and every one of them deserves

1367
01:09:02.346 --> 01:09:07.894
if I'm worried about all the
complexities of your day-to-day.

1368
01:09:07.977 --> 01:09:10.146
It's a lot, kid. I'm sorry.

1369
01:09:10.229 --> 01:09:13.316
So what? You don't want
to work together anymore?

1370
01:09:13.399 --> 01:09:17.403
Well, it's just the current situation
isn't fair to you, either.

1371
01:09:17.486 --> 01:09:22.366
I can't commit to you 100%
if I got other things on my mind,

1372
01:09:22.450 --> 01:09:25.119
which unfortunately I do.
The stable.

1373
01:09:25.203 --> 01:09:27.831
Sandy, let's not do this right now.

1374
01:09:29.207 --> 01:09:31.876
Let's take a minute and think it over.

1375
01:09:31.960 --> 01:09:33.878
I don't need a minute.

1376
01:09:33.962 --> 01:09:37.506
I promised your dad
I'd always do what's best for you.

1377
01:09:37.590 --> 01:09:38.925
This is best.

1378
01:09:43.221 --> 01:09:44.388
So that's it?

1379
01:09:46.265 --> 01:09:49.143
You ever need me, just beep.

1380
01:09:51.479 --> 01:09:52.646
Sandy.

1381
01:09:55.942 --> 01:09:56.943
Beep.

1382
01:09:58.737 --> 01:10:00.529
You're gonna be all right, Courtney.

1383
01:10:01.530 --> 01:10:02.949
You're gonna be a legend.

1384
01:10:05.534 --> 01:10:06.995
Brightest star out there.

1385
01:10:31.269 --> 01:10:35.481
Legend has it he stayed in that car
and cried for... six hours?

1386
01:10:40.528 --> 01:10:44.073
Someone called child services 'cause
they thought a little girl was in trouble.

1387
01:10:44.157 --> 01:10:45.158
- Yeah.
- In a car.

1388
01:10:49.829 --> 01:10:51.790
I mean, not that anybody has a good cry,

1389
01:10:51.873 --> 01:10:53.750
but his cry sounded
like some kind of, like,

1390
01:10:53.833 --> 01:10:56.335
lonesome moose.

1391
01:11:02.091 --> 01:11:04.761
Whatever the amount of time was
that he cried,

1392
01:11:04.844 --> 01:11:06.805
he broke his own rules.
He just got too close.

1393
01:11:06.888 --> 01:11:09.182
It was Alfred all over again.

1394
01:11:09.265 --> 01:11:10.516
That was a tough time...

1395
01:11:12.769 --> 01:11:18.441
'cause Sandy not only lost
his most talented client ever,

1396
01:11:18.524 --> 01:11:22.195
but he also lost this person
he had feelings for.

1397
01:11:23.196 --> 01:11:24.948
It must've been
especially painful for Sandy,

1398
01:11:25.031 --> 01:11:27.366
because Courtney Clarke was everywhere.

1399
01:11:30.494 --> 01:11:31.495
Whoo!

1400
01:11:38.920 --> 01:11:41.881
Gary Rodgers, ladies and gentlemen.

1401
01:11:41.964 --> 01:11:45.802
♪ There's something
In the way that you smile ♪

1402
01:11:46.969 --> 01:11:52.266
♪ There's something
In the way that you talk to me ♪

1403
01:11:52.350 --> 01:11:57.355
♪ The way that you look at me
Boy, I can't see anything... ♪

1404
01:11:57.438 --> 01:11:59.482
Yo, man, your girl blew up.
She the shit now.

1405
01:11:59.565 --> 01:12:01.609
- Congratulations, Sandy.
- Yeah.

1406
01:12:01.692 --> 01:12:03.777
Yeah, she's doing great. Uh...

1407
01:12:03.862 --> 01:12:06.114
We're not working together
anymore, though.

1408
01:12:07.198 --> 01:12:09.783
Oh. Now that makes sense.

1409
01:12:09.868 --> 01:12:11.160
Later, dawg.

1410
01:12:11.244 --> 01:12:13.496
Yeah. That makes sense.

1411
01:12:14.330 --> 01:12:16.875
It makes sense if I kill you, Arsenio.

1412
01:12:18.001 --> 01:12:19.210
That would make sense.

1413
01:12:19.293 --> 01:12:22.630
♪ I know it is destiny ♪

1414
01:12:26.300 --> 01:12:29.803
♪ Hot summer nights, lovers ♪

1415
01:12:29.888 --> 01:12:31.305
Get out of town with that.

1416
01:12:31.389 --> 01:12:34.058
♪ Samba dancing with
Fire in their eyes burning ♪

1417
01:12:34.142 --> 01:12:35.184
Come on.

1418
01:12:35.894 --> 01:12:39.063
♪ Hearts on full with desire ♪

1419
01:12:39.147 --> 01:12:42.525
♪ Wanting you, wanting me ♪

1420
01:12:42.608 --> 01:12:47.613
♪ Gonna make you wanna fall in love
Love, love, love ♪

1421
01:12:48.697 --> 01:12:51.659
♪ Yeah, I think I'm gonna fall in love ♪

1422
01:12:52.368 --> 01:12:55.663
Oh, jeez, you're going for this?
Give me a break here.

1423
01:12:55.746 --> 01:12:59.500
♪ Samba dancing with
Fire in their eyes burning ♪

1424
01:12:59.583 --> 01:13:03.546
♪ Hearts on full with desire... ♪

1425
01:13:03.629 --> 01:13:05.006
All right. That's enough.

1426
01:13:06.049 --> 01:13:07.175
Come on, already.

1427
01:13:50.468 --> 01:13:51.885
What have we got here?

1428
01:13:54.931 --> 01:13:57.391
Sandy!

1429
01:13:57.475 --> 01:13:59.518
I was scared you wouldn't come.

1430
01:14:01.062 --> 01:14:04.398
Hey. Where's Peter? Is he doing PT?

1431
01:14:04.482 --> 01:14:07.651
Sandy, why don't you
take off your shoes?

1432
01:14:07.735 --> 01:14:10.238
Take off my... Oh, for your rug?

1433
01:14:10.321 --> 01:14:12.240
You know, my shoes are actually cleaner

1434
01:14:12.323 --> 01:14:14.867
than my socks, but...

1435
01:14:14.951 --> 01:14:16.369
And here we are.

1436
01:14:17.996 --> 01:14:19.956
- Hey, hey.
- And here's your throne.

1437
01:14:20.039 --> 01:14:22.083
Why don't you sit down, Sandy?

1438
01:14:22.166 --> 01:14:24.252
- Hey.
- What would you like to drink?

1439
01:14:24.335 --> 01:14:26.462
You know, I got a bit of a sour stomach.

1440
01:14:26.545 --> 01:14:30.633
If you got Dr. Brown's black cherry
diet, that would be perfect.

1441
01:14:32.593 --> 01:14:35.638
Or a big glass of whiskey.
Either way is...

1442
01:14:45.398 --> 01:14:46.399
Oh, look.

1443
01:14:46.983 --> 01:14:48.734
Ah.

1444
01:14:52.488 --> 01:14:56.700
Did you ever see
that naughty little movie, 9½ Weeks?

1445
01:14:56.784 --> 01:14:58.119
No, I didn't.

1446
01:14:58.202 --> 01:15:01.414
I saw Problem Child, though.
That kid was hysterical.

1447
01:15:03.582 --> 01:15:07.586
Well, not as funny as that.
Look at you.

1448
01:15:08.421 --> 01:15:11.465
- Peter's been sick for a long time.
- Yeah.

1449
01:15:12.466 --> 01:15:14.927
And a woman yearns for a man's touch.

1450
01:15:15.636 --> 01:15:17.138
Hey, no, that's natural.

1451
01:15:17.221 --> 01:15:19.098
Are you a man, Sandy?

1452
01:15:20.183 --> 01:15:21.975
I don't know. I...

1453
01:15:22.060 --> 01:15:24.645
I was bar mitzvahed,
but that was a long time ago.

1454
01:15:27.565 --> 01:15:29.567
- You know what I love about you?
- Yeah?

1455
01:15:29.650 --> 01:15:31.860
Your voice.

1456
01:15:31.944 --> 01:15:34.113
Come on. I've got a surprise.

1457
01:15:35.448 --> 01:15:36.574
- Come along.
- Hey, what's this?

1458
01:15:36.657 --> 01:15:38.951
- Just sit here. Now, sit.
- Oh! Oh, yeah.

1459
01:15:39.035 --> 01:15:41.620
Aye, aye, aye! Yeah!

1460
01:15:41.704 --> 01:15:43.497
Touch me, Sandy. Touch me.

1461
01:15:43.581 --> 01:15:46.584
Well, I... I was just walking
on the carpet in my socks.

1462
01:15:46.667 --> 01:15:51.630
- I don't wanna zap you.
- Oh. You can zap me. Just zap me.

1463
01:15:55.343 --> 01:15:57.095
Cindy!

1464
01:16:06.812 --> 01:16:11.024
Don't worry about Peter.
He only wants my happiness.

1465
01:16:11.109 --> 01:16:12.360
Yeah.

1466
01:16:18.907 --> 01:16:21.410
I can't do it. I can't.

1467
01:16:21.494 --> 01:16:23.954
- I'd feel better if we...
- Don't, Sandy, please.

1468
01:16:24.038 --> 01:16:26.540
- Don't leave. Stay here.
- Oh...

1469
01:16:26.624 --> 01:16:28.459
We... we could put a blanket
over his head.

1470
01:16:29.293 --> 01:16:33.256
That's... that's actually a thought.

1471
01:16:33.339 --> 01:16:36.008
No. He says no. He said... I'm sorry.

1472
01:16:36.092 --> 01:16:39.220
I consider Peter a friend,

1473
01:16:39.303 --> 01:16:43.141
whether he's alive or dead
or in a vegetative state.

1474
01:16:43.224 --> 01:16:45.601
Thanks for the offer, okay?

1475
01:16:46.810 --> 01:16:50.063
I got the shock! I knew I... The socks.

1476
01:16:57.405 --> 01:16:58.406
Pervert.

1477
01:17:03.744 --> 01:17:04.870
- Cindy!
- Cindy!

1478
01:17:04.953 --> 01:17:06.247
Madonna!

1479
01:17:06.330 --> 01:17:07.415
Melissa!

1480
01:17:08.291 --> 01:17:10.834
Wrapping up the CDs.

1481
01:17:10.918 --> 01:17:13.045
Doing too good a job. I feel that...

1482
01:17:14.505 --> 01:17:18.091
Just... a little bit overzealous
with the wrapping is my feeling.

1483
01:17:18.176 --> 01:17:21.470
What is the security on this thing?

1484
01:17:21.554 --> 01:17:22.846
It's a $12 item.

1485
01:17:22.930 --> 01:17:24.848
They got it wrapped up
like the Hope Diamond.

1486
01:17:25.974 --> 01:17:27.768
It's impossible
that they have cellophane...

1487
01:17:27.851 --> 01:17:32.022
What are you doing? You look gloomy.
Reiser's killing out there. Come on.

1488
01:17:32.105 --> 01:17:34.775
You're like a monkey with a coconut.
You're just looking at it...

1489
01:17:34.858 --> 01:17:37.653
He's killing the jokes that I wrote.
It should be me up there killing it.

1490
01:17:37.736 --> 01:17:41.407
Next year, it will be.
CBS sees your jokes work now.

1491
01:17:41.490 --> 01:17:44.327
Next year, you'll be telling those
jokes, 'cause you wrote 'em.

1492
01:17:48.080 --> 01:17:51.209
You want me to do the jokes
he's telling right now

1493
01:17:51.292 --> 01:17:52.293
on next year's Grammys?

1494
01:17:52.376 --> 01:17:54.170
But you do 'em in your voice.

1495
01:17:54.253 --> 01:17:56.672
But the punch lines are the same.
People have heard them already.

1496
01:17:56.755 --> 01:17:58.299
You do new punch lines.

1497
01:17:58.382 --> 01:18:00.509
So then they're new...
They're new jokes.

1498
01:18:00.593 --> 01:18:02.761
No, but you're doing 'em in your voice.

1499
01:18:02.845 --> 01:18:04.222
I wanna strangle you.

1500
01:18:04.305 --> 01:18:05.806
- Don't say "your voice" again.
- What are you...

1501
01:18:05.889 --> 01:18:07.558
I'm gonna kill you
if you say "in my voice."

1502
01:18:07.641 --> 01:18:09.768
- Would you stop? I can't ever...
- Sandy?

1503
01:18:12.355 --> 01:18:13.356
Courtney.

1504
01:18:14.607 --> 01:18:16.359
Look at you!

1505
01:18:16.442 --> 01:18:19.945
- Hey! Hey.
- Hey! Oh.

1506
01:18:21.739 --> 01:18:25.618
You, uh, remember my, uh,
client Paul Reiser?

1507
01:18:26.619 --> 01:18:28.746
- Kevin Connors.
- Kevin!

1508
01:18:29.455 --> 01:18:31.540
They should have had you host this show.

1509
01:18:31.624 --> 01:18:35.669
Paul Reiser is usually funny,
but his jokes tonight are just corny.

1510
01:18:37.380 --> 01:18:39.673
- You still doing Atkins? I see.
- Atkins.

1511
01:18:39.757 --> 01:18:41.467
- You look great!
- Thank you. Well, my God.

1512
01:18:41.550 --> 01:18:43.135
- I look good? Look at you.
- You look so good!

1513
01:18:43.219 --> 01:18:45.929
I have been following you.
You are doing so well.

1514
01:18:46.013 --> 01:18:49.600
The Grammy tonight. Did I tell you
when that was gonna happen, huh?

1515
01:18:49.683 --> 01:18:51.227
You deserve it all. You really do.

1516
01:18:51.310 --> 01:18:54.605
You deserve it, too.
I wouldn't be here without you.

1517
01:18:54.688 --> 01:18:57.775
Are you kidding me?
You cannot stop a shooting star.

1518
01:18:57.858 --> 01:18:59.735
- Aw.
- Our scientists have proven this.

1519
01:19:00.361 --> 01:19:02.321
You are unbelievable, Sandy.

1520
01:19:02.405 --> 01:19:04.407
How's Bling? Where is he?

1521
01:19:04.490 --> 01:19:07.660
Yeah, he's my label guy.
He's not my guy-guy anymore.

1522
01:19:07.743 --> 01:19:11.079
- Well, I'm so sorry. That's...
- Don't be.

1523
01:19:11.163 --> 01:19:12.998
Things happen for a reason.

1524
01:19:13.081 --> 01:19:14.625
I scored us each a goodie bag, my sweet.

1525
01:19:14.708 --> 01:19:16.960
- Hi, cuteness.
- Can I keep your PlayStation?

1526
01:19:17.044 --> 01:19:18.296
Yes.

1527
01:19:18.379 --> 01:19:24.009
Guys, this is my new boyfriend, Ra...
Say it for me, babe.

1528
01:19:24.092 --> 01:19:25.511
Ramiro Alejandro.

1529
01:19:25.594 --> 01:19:29.307
- Sandy Wexler.
- Nice to meet you, Ramir...

1530
01:19:29.390 --> 01:19:31.183
- Ramiro Alejandro.
- I know.

1531
01:19:31.267 --> 01:19:34.395
Oh, is this the old Make-A-Wish guy
you were telling me about?

1532
01:19:34.478 --> 01:19:37.105
No. No, we used to work together.

1533
01:19:37.189 --> 01:19:40.150
Hey, you wanna come to Clive Davis'
after-party? You could ride with us.

1534
01:19:40.233 --> 01:19:42.069
I, uh, would love to.

1535
01:19:42.152 --> 01:19:44.405
- I, uh, have to go somewhere.
- Aw.

1536
01:19:44.488 --> 01:19:47.491
A client of mine... Amy Baskin.
You... you remember Amy.

1537
01:19:47.575 --> 01:19:48.576
Yeah!

1538
01:19:48.659 --> 01:19:52.913
Yes, well, she got the lead in "Sound
of Music" at the Pasadena Playhouse.

1539
01:19:52.996 --> 01:19:56.917
- She'll be Partygoer Number One.
- Yeah, that's the lead.

1540
01:19:57.000 --> 01:19:59.545
It is. She's...
She's the lead partygoer.

1541
01:19:59.628 --> 01:20:02.798
Let's get together real soon, Sandy.
Promise me.

1542
01:20:02.881 --> 01:20:05.759
- I promise. You promise me this.
- Of course. What?

1543
01:20:05.843 --> 01:20:07.177
- After Clive's party...
- Mmm-hmm.

1544
01:20:07.260 --> 01:20:09.638
- ...you put on the ugly duckling hat...
- Oh, gosh.

1545
01:20:09.722 --> 01:20:11.682
...and you remind yourself
where you came from.

1546
01:20:11.765 --> 01:20:13.058
Not on this hair.

1547
01:20:13.141 --> 01:20:15.143
- Like we... Nope, not on your hair.
- Courtney...

1548
01:20:15.227 --> 01:20:16.729
- You promise?
- ...we have to go.

1549
01:20:16.812 --> 01:20:18.522
- I promise. Okay.
- I gotta see you. Okay.

1550
01:20:18.606 --> 01:20:20.399
Good to see you, babe.

1551
01:20:20.483 --> 01:20:23.944
Nice meeting you, Sammy!
Hope they find a cure for you, buddy.

1552
01:20:24.027 --> 01:20:25.821
Buddy, move. Move!

1553
01:20:25.904 --> 01:20:27.656
- Get out the way!
- Which way are you moving?

1554
01:20:27.740 --> 01:20:28.866
- Okay, go!
- Sandy, move! Sandy!

1555
01:20:28.949 --> 01:20:30.743
That was another tough
goodbye for Sandy.

1556
01:20:30.826 --> 01:20:34.121
He... he didn't even know if he would
ever see or talk to Courtney again.

1557
01:20:34.204 --> 01:20:35.664
Of course he kept himself busy.

1558
01:20:35.748 --> 01:20:37.249
He actually signed someone

1559
01:20:37.333 --> 01:20:40.210
who was involved in the biggest form
of entertainment in the '90s.

1560
01:20:40.293 --> 01:20:41.795
Wrestling. Professional wrestling.

1561
01:20:45.090 --> 01:20:47.676
Yeah!

1562
01:20:56.935 --> 01:20:57.936
Yeah!

1563
01:21:07.446 --> 01:21:12.284
Go to sleep, baby!
It's night-night time!

1564
01:21:23.295 --> 01:21:25.005
- You're the man, Bedtime.
- Isn't he?

1565
01:21:25.088 --> 01:21:26.757
Oh, I know you're gonna
take the title on Sunday.

1566
01:21:26.840 --> 01:21:29.885
I'm gonna make 'em go night-night.

1567
01:21:30.969 --> 01:21:33.764
- Thank you.
- I'm gonna lose.

1568
01:21:33.847 --> 01:21:35.724
You don't know that. Hang on, please.

1569
01:21:35.808 --> 01:21:38.727
Yeah, I do know that. I got the script.

1570
01:21:38.811 --> 01:21:42.440
Tsunami sits on my face until I tap out.
I'm never gonna be the champ.

1571
01:21:42.523 --> 01:21:43.691
Okay, look.

1572
01:21:43.774 --> 01:21:47.820
The good thing is, you're gonna have
a grown man sit on your face,

1573
01:21:47.903 --> 01:21:51.156
and the entire world is gonna
be watching. That's a positive.

1574
01:21:51.239 --> 01:21:53.325
- That's not a positive.
- It's a positive because it's...

1575
01:21:53.409 --> 01:21:54.702
- The fame factor.
- What?

1576
01:21:54.785 --> 01:21:57.955
Hey, Bedtime. Will you rock me like a baby
while my brother Dicky gets a picture?

1577
01:21:58.038 --> 01:21:59.957
- What are you, six?
- Yeah, of course he will.

1578
01:22:00.040 --> 01:22:02.167
- Of course he will do it.
- Do you see the size of this guy?

1579
01:22:02.250 --> 01:22:03.293
Just get on it.

1580
01:22:03.376 --> 01:22:07.297
Oh. Hang on, guys.
My cellular device is ringing.

1581
01:22:08.048 --> 01:22:10.383
And I hit this, and I pull this.

1582
01:22:11.218 --> 01:22:12.344
Wexler Artists.

1583
01:22:12.428 --> 01:22:14.847
Mr. Wexler, it is
Chippy from Dan Tana's.

1584
01:22:14.930 --> 01:22:19.685
Chippy! Hey! How's it going?
How was your vacation to Cincinnati?

1585
01:22:19.768 --> 01:22:22.395
It was, uh, not a vacation.
My mother died.

1586
01:22:22.480 --> 01:22:24.022
I went to Cincinnati for the funeral.

1587
01:22:24.106 --> 01:22:26.358
Oh, yeah. That's right.
How's your mother?

1588
01:22:27.985 --> 01:22:29.194
What are you calling for?

1589
01:22:29.277 --> 01:22:32.990
We have a delicate situation with a client
of yours who has had too much to drink.

1590
01:22:33.073 --> 01:22:35.826
And unfortunately,
there are very many paparazzi out front.

1591
01:22:37.035 --> 01:22:39.204
Oh, boy. Was it Gary or Kevin?

1592
01:22:44.376 --> 01:22:46.336
Yeah, I chased him
for six or seven blocks.

1593
01:22:46.419 --> 01:22:50.173
Just come on. Get a life, guys. Jeez.

1594
01:22:56.429 --> 01:22:58.223
- Bring me to the package.
- This way.

1595
01:23:07.816 --> 01:23:09.026
Courtney?

1596
01:23:10.360 --> 01:23:13.446
What the... What's going on, kiddo?

1597
01:23:14.031 --> 01:23:16.324
Sandy! They found you!

1598
01:23:16.408 --> 01:23:17.868
Yeah, they found me.

1599
01:23:17.951 --> 01:23:21.288
You just stay put, okay?
You stay right there.

1600
01:23:26.084 --> 01:23:28.462
Aw, Sandy to the rescue.

1601
01:23:29.379 --> 01:23:32.675
No one can find out about this.
You understand me, Chippy? Not even you.

1602
01:23:33.717 --> 01:23:34.885
Okay, Sandy.

1603
01:23:36.303 --> 01:23:37.763
- Okay.
- Sandy!

1604
01:23:39.807 --> 01:23:42.810
What? She'll suffocate?
Is that what you're saying?

1605
01:23:42.893 --> 01:23:45.353
Courtney! Courtney! Courtney!

1606
01:23:45.437 --> 01:23:47.314
Go jump in a lake, fellas!

1607
01:23:53.070 --> 01:23:57.741
Ah! No, no, no, no! Oh, come on!
Oh, please, please, please.

1608
01:23:58.951 --> 01:24:01.494
Keep your voices down. Let her sleep.

1609
01:24:03.121 --> 01:24:06.625
That's right. Just sleep. Sleep, sleep.

1610
01:24:07.209 --> 01:24:09.545
Let me get this up for you.

1611
01:24:10.462 --> 01:24:13.131
And you... you're breathing.

1612
01:24:13.882 --> 01:24:15.050
Are you breathing?

1613
01:24:15.759 --> 01:24:17.761
Yeah, there it is. Okay.

1614
01:24:17.845 --> 01:24:18.929
You'll be all right.

1615
01:24:21.056 --> 01:24:24.893
I'm telling you, he's the best
ventriloquist in the business. He...

1616
01:24:24.977 --> 01:24:26.436
You don't see him talking?

1617
01:24:26.519 --> 01:24:31.441
No, you see his lips move slightly,
but that's not the important thing.

1618
01:24:31.524 --> 01:24:34.069
The important thing
is what the guy is saying.

1619
01:24:34.152 --> 01:24:37.197
No one looks at the lips
if they're laughing, then...

1620
01:24:37.280 --> 01:24:38.949
No, kids love him.

1621
01:24:39.032 --> 01:24:42.786
That's why I'm bringing it up
to you. The kids will love this guy.

1622
01:24:42.870 --> 01:24:46.373
He's got curly hair,
and... and he's got the mustache.

1623
01:24:46.456 --> 01:24:47.457
I'm sorry.

1624
01:24:47.540 --> 01:24:50.502
- Linda, I'm... I'm just asking if you...
- Do you want some breakfast?

1625
01:24:50.586 --> 01:24:52.504
- Sandy...
- If you could just

1626
01:24:52.588 --> 01:24:54.547
put a good word in for me. That's it.

1627
01:24:54.632 --> 01:24:56.717
Maybe put his headshot on his desk.

1628
01:24:56.800 --> 01:24:59.136
- I really wish I could, Sandy.
- Hey, just meat, right?

1629
01:24:59.219 --> 01:25:01.554
Oh, yeah. Hold on. Just meat.

1630
01:25:02.598 --> 01:25:03.766
Just meet with him.

1631
01:25:04.474 --> 01:25:06.852
That's all I'm asking you to do.
Just meet with him.

1632
01:25:06.935 --> 01:25:08.103
All right, Sandy.

1633
01:25:08.186 --> 01:25:11.564
Thank you, Linda! Thank you!

1634
01:25:11.649 --> 01:25:13.525
Happy birthday on Wednesday.

1635
01:25:13.609 --> 01:25:15.903
- How did you know that?
- Yeah, 'cause I know.

1636
01:25:15.986 --> 01:25:18.238
'Cause I know. I know everything.

1637
01:25:20.073 --> 01:25:22.618
How good is this? Phenomenal.

1638
01:25:22.701 --> 01:25:24.662
No one knows
how to cook health food like...

1639
01:25:24.745 --> 01:25:27.205
You're fantastic. You can do it all.

1640
01:25:27.915 --> 01:25:31.293
I owe you for last night.
I'm embarrassed.

1641
01:25:31.960 --> 01:25:34.462
Hey, everybody gets zonked
once in a while.

1642
01:25:34.546 --> 01:25:36.924
The question is, why are we doing it?

1643
01:25:38.175 --> 01:25:39.593
I don't know. I...

1644
01:25:40.135 --> 01:25:41.594
I just broke up with Billy.

1645
01:25:41.679 --> 01:25:45.432
Billy? Who's Billy?
What happened to the Marc Anthony fella?

1646
01:25:45.515 --> 01:25:47.059
Marc Anthony? Come on, Sandy.

1647
01:25:47.142 --> 01:25:49.687
Pick up a People magazine
every once in a while.

1648
01:25:49.770 --> 01:25:51.855
That was three boyfriends ago.

1649
01:25:51.939 --> 01:25:55.525
Oh, hey, I gotta start writing
some of these names down.

1650
01:25:55.608 --> 01:25:58.737
I'm getting lost.
I'm joking around with you.

1651
01:25:58.821 --> 01:26:01.239
What you're doing's perfectly natural.

1652
01:26:01.323 --> 01:26:03.742
Anyone in your position
would be doing the same.

1653
01:26:03.826 --> 01:26:05.160
Look, Liza did it.

1654
01:26:05.869 --> 01:26:08.956
Elizabeth Taylor did it.
Sherwood Schwartz did it.

1655
01:26:09.039 --> 01:26:11.583
Just my life.

1656
01:26:12.710 --> 01:26:14.419
It feels out of control.

1657
01:26:14.502 --> 01:26:18.882
I can't connect with anybody.
I don't... I just don't feel safe.

1658
01:26:18.966 --> 01:26:20.926
I can't even go ten feet

1659
01:26:21.009 --> 01:26:25.806
without the paparazzi following me,
taking pictures of me, spying on me.

1660
01:26:25.889 --> 01:26:27.390
I don't even want to
leave my house anymore.

1661
01:26:27.474 --> 01:26:29.101
What? You gotta leave your house.

1662
01:26:29.184 --> 01:26:32.062
Even Michael Jackson
leaves his house once in a while.

1663
01:26:32.813 --> 01:26:33.647
How?

1664
01:26:33.731 --> 01:26:36.734
He just don't look like Michael Jackson.

1665
01:26:40.570 --> 01:26:42.655
Excuse me, sir.
You know what time it is?

1666
01:26:45.617 --> 01:26:47.160
Can you do me a favor?

1667
01:26:47.244 --> 01:26:50.789
Courtney Clarke was just in there.
Uh, could you find out where she went?

1668
01:26:50.873 --> 01:26:53.625
This is...
Somebody just got their life back!

1669
01:26:53.709 --> 01:26:56.378
...Why do you own this stuff?

1670
01:26:56.461 --> 01:26:58.839
Why? Those are my workout clothes.

1671
01:26:58.922 --> 01:27:00.799
You work out?

1672
01:27:00.883 --> 01:27:04.928
Suzanne Somers personally gave me
one of the very first ThighMasters.

1673
01:27:05.012 --> 01:27:06.263
I use it as much as I can.

1674
01:27:06.346 --> 01:27:08.015
This conversation is over.

1675
01:27:08.098 --> 01:27:10.392
What? It's for firm thighs and buttocks.

1676
01:27:10.475 --> 01:27:12.936
- Sandy, please stop talking.
- All right.

1677
01:27:13.686 --> 01:27:14.772
What we gonna do today?

1678
01:27:14.855 --> 01:27:17.733
What we gonna do today?
Anything you want, kiddo.

1679
01:27:17.816 --> 01:27:20.861
- Okay, lead the way, ThighMaster.
- Hey! Now, wait a minute.

1680
01:27:20.944 --> 01:27:23.864
- By the way, the dogs are good for cardio.
- Oh.

1681
01:27:24.907 --> 01:27:25.908
What does that mean?

1682
01:27:25.991 --> 01:27:27.159
You'll see.

1683
01:27:27.242 --> 01:27:29.995
- Go! Run! Run! Run!
- Okay! Okay!

1684
01:27:31.872 --> 01:27:33.581
Well, here comes the test.

1685
01:27:34.792 --> 01:27:37.585
Look at that. Look at that. Huh?

1686
01:27:37.669 --> 01:27:39.254
...Wow.

1687
01:27:40.798 --> 01:27:42.215
Why am I golfing?

1688
01:27:42.299 --> 01:27:44.134
Golfing is very relaxing.

1689
01:27:44.217 --> 01:27:47.512
You don't have to think
about nothing but smacking that ball.

1690
01:27:47.595 --> 01:27:49.306
Have you ever played before?

1691
01:27:49.389 --> 01:27:52.225
- No.
- No? It's quite easy.

1692
01:27:52.309 --> 01:27:55.687
I'll take out the big stick
'cause it's fun to hit 'em far.

1693
01:27:55.771 --> 01:27:59.316
It's always good to warm up a little bit.
Ow! Okay.

1694
01:27:59.399 --> 01:28:02.235
I got actually a little problem
in the back.

1695
01:28:02.319 --> 01:28:04.696
- You okay?
- Yeah. Just give me one sec.

1696
01:28:04.780 --> 01:28:05.781
God damn it.

1697
01:28:05.864 --> 01:28:07.699
- Should I call for help?
- No, I'll be all right.

1698
01:28:07.783 --> 01:28:09.993
Just give me one sec.
I just gotta stretch.

1699
01:28:11.787 --> 01:28:14.915
All right. Just give me one more sec.
I do need help.

1700
01:28:22.089 --> 01:28:23.631
You need to go to the bathroom?

1701
01:28:23.715 --> 01:28:26.259
No, I'm just... I'm getting it lined up.

1702
01:28:27.385 --> 01:28:30.931
Let's just say goodbye
to all our troubles, okay?

1703
01:28:31.014 --> 01:28:32.015
Okay.

1704
01:28:32.099 --> 01:28:35.102
If you got any problems, put 'em
into the ball and send them away.

1705
01:28:37.604 --> 01:28:40.357
Is it supposed to curve
off to the right like that?

1706
01:28:40.440 --> 01:28:42.609
Yeah, I was playing a dogleg right.

1707
01:28:42.692 --> 01:28:44.402
- A dogleg?
- Right.

1708
01:28:44.486 --> 01:28:47.489
You gotta bend it around the trees,
and that's what I was going for.

1709
01:28:47.572 --> 01:28:49.657
- Can I try it?
- You wanna try? Okay.

1710
01:28:49.741 --> 01:28:51.701
I was gonna show you
a little more, but okay.

1711
01:28:51.784 --> 01:28:53.370
- Okay.
- So let me...

1712
01:28:53.453 --> 01:28:55.163
You know, maybe you should
tee it up for yourself.

1713
01:28:55.247 --> 01:28:56.539
Tee it up. Here.

1714
01:28:56.623 --> 01:28:59.001
- You tee it up, and you say goodbye.
- Right here.

1715
01:28:59.084 --> 01:29:00.085
Okay.

1716
01:29:00.168 --> 01:29:02.045
And just have a good time
and don't worry about where it goes.

1717
01:29:02.129 --> 01:29:03.839
- Let's see.
- Okay.

1718
01:29:08.343 --> 01:29:11.179
Am I being hustled right now?
What was that?

1719
01:29:11.263 --> 01:29:15.350
I swear I didn't play every day growing up
with my Uncle Davey who's a golf pro.

1720
01:29:15.433 --> 01:29:17.227
Oh, well...

1721
01:29:17.310 --> 01:29:19.855
Does this guy need a manager because...

1722
01:29:19.938 --> 01:29:21.773
- Come over here.
- What are we doing?

1723
01:29:21.857 --> 01:29:23.108
We gotta work on that slice leg.

1724
01:29:23.191 --> 01:29:24.692
- Oh, my God.
- Here you go. Here you go.

1725
01:29:24.776 --> 01:29:26.904
- This is your day. I don't want to...
- No. No, no, no. You got it?

1726
01:29:26.987 --> 01:29:29.322
- You're okay with it?
- Oh, it's my day now. Come on.

1727
01:29:29.406 --> 01:29:30.615
- In the hips.
- In the hips.

1728
01:29:30.698 --> 01:29:31.699
Here we go.

1729
01:29:31.783 --> 01:29:34.494
Oh! All right! Hold on now.

1730
01:29:35.120 --> 01:29:37.705
Huh? I beg your pardon?

1731
01:29:37.789 --> 01:29:38.790
Tell me. Tell me.

1732
01:29:38.874 --> 01:29:40.000
A company called Pixar...

1733
01:29:40.083 --> 01:29:41.334
- Pixar?
- ...wants me to do a voice

1734
01:29:41.418 --> 01:29:43.545
in some animated movie
about a bunch of toys.

1735
01:29:43.628 --> 01:29:45.005
Cartoons are dead.

1736
01:29:45.088 --> 01:29:46.589
Tell 'em pass.

1737
01:29:46.673 --> 01:29:49.176
- Okay. Sandy knows best.
- I mean, come on. I do know best.

1738
01:29:49.259 --> 01:29:53.555
The lady at Chili's said they'll keep it
open till 10:30 for us, so that's good.

1739
01:29:53.638 --> 01:29:54.973
How you feeling anyway?

1740
01:29:55.057 --> 01:29:56.141
As good as anybody can feel

1741
01:29:56.224 --> 01:29:58.393
knowing they're about to get
their face sat on by that guy.

1742
01:29:59.352 --> 01:30:00.562
Damn, that's a big ass!

1743
01:30:00.645 --> 01:30:02.272
- That's right...
- Get off me!

1744
01:30:02.355 --> 01:30:05.442
Listen. Will you just trust me?
This is a good night for you.

1745
01:30:05.525 --> 01:30:06.651
Trust you? It's humiliating.

1746
01:30:06.734 --> 01:30:09.446
My kids are out there, man!
My wife might not ever kiss me again!

1747
01:30:09.529 --> 01:30:12.490
Randy Savage had to get whooped 24 times

1748
01:30:12.574 --> 01:30:15.868
before he finally pinned Ted DiBiase
to win the belt, man!

1749
01:30:15.953 --> 01:30:18.455
How does your platinum-selling ass
know about wrestling history?

1750
01:30:18.538 --> 01:30:21.708
I'm from Alaska.
It was either watch wrestling or fish.

1751
01:30:21.791 --> 01:30:23.376
Is that adorable?

1752
01:30:23.460 --> 01:30:26.379
Will you just take it all in
and promise me you'll have fun?

1753
01:30:26.463 --> 01:30:28.923
This is a big night for you.
Look at me.

1754
01:30:29.007 --> 01:30:31.593
Man, how does your goofy ass
have me feeling good right now?

1755
01:30:31.676 --> 01:30:32.677
That's impossible!

1756
01:30:32.760 --> 01:30:35.472
Because you know I love ya
and I'm your family.

1757
01:30:35.555 --> 01:30:37.224
All right, good luck.

1758
01:30:37.307 --> 01:30:38.641
Get out there!

1759
01:30:43.271 --> 01:30:44.647
Yeah! Come on!

1760
01:30:53.823 --> 01:30:55.908
Fight!

1761
01:30:59.204 --> 01:31:00.288
Okay.

1762
01:31:16.638 --> 01:31:17.847
No!

1763
01:31:24.771 --> 01:31:26.064
Break, break, break, break!

1764
01:31:26.898 --> 01:31:29.817
Hey, what are you doing?
Stick to the script.

1765
01:31:29.901 --> 01:31:31.736
I'm sorry, Tsunami.
You're gonna have to earn this one.

1766
01:31:31.819 --> 01:31:33.030
What? Hey...

1767
01:31:37.325 --> 01:31:39.952
This is bullshit.
I'm supposed to win.

1768
01:31:40.037 --> 01:31:42.622
This happening?
Huh, this is happening?

1769
01:31:42.705 --> 01:31:43.790
Well, bring it on!

1770
01:31:49.837 --> 01:31:51.839
Okay, get back there, champ!

1771
01:31:54.592 --> 01:31:56.636
There it is. Now it's getting real.

1772
01:32:00.807 --> 01:32:02.016
Thank you very much!

1773
01:32:06.563 --> 01:32:07.439
What is this?

1774
01:32:15.197 --> 01:32:17.532
No, you're not! What's going on here?

1775
01:32:26.833 --> 01:32:27.917
Say it!

1776
01:32:28.000 --> 01:32:30.212
It's time to go night-night!

1777
01:32:50.440 --> 01:32:53.151
- I got the belt! I'm the champ!
- You the man! You the man!

1778
01:32:53.235 --> 01:32:56.028
- Sandy! How?
- What do you... Huh?

1779
01:32:56.613 --> 01:33:01.784
The referee is a client, and
Wexler Artists look out for each other.

1780
01:33:01.868 --> 01:33:04.078
Oh, man!
Those guys are gonna fire his ass!

1781
01:33:04.162 --> 01:33:05.705
Of course they are,

1782
01:33:05.788 --> 01:33:09.667
but I already got him a job as a referee
for the Harlem Globetrotters.

1783
01:33:09.751 --> 01:33:12.086
- I know. I understand.
- You're never going to work again!

1784
01:33:12.170 --> 01:33:14.547
What do you say, champ? Proud of ya.

1785
01:33:15.465 --> 01:33:18.135
Oh! I'm so happy, Sandy!

1786
01:33:18.218 --> 01:33:21.721
I love you. This is your moment.
This is all you.

1787
01:33:21.804 --> 01:33:24.432
I'm just so happy for you
and your wife and your kids.

1788
01:33:24.516 --> 01:33:25.767
Okay? That's all I want.

1789
01:33:25.850 --> 01:33:28.186
- I love you! I love you!
- You deserve everything!

1790
01:33:28.270 --> 01:33:30.980
- Courtney, get in here!
- You deserve everything!

1791
01:33:31.063 --> 01:33:32.774
Uh, we do have to go to Chili's, though.

1792
01:33:32.857 --> 01:33:35.527
I told the lady we'd be there
by 10:30, so let's get going.

1793
01:33:35.610 --> 01:33:38.112
- Why are you talking about Chili's now?
- I just don't wanna...

1794
01:33:38.196 --> 01:33:41.324
I don't want her to screw us
for the next time, you know. Let's go.

1795
01:33:55.338 --> 01:33:57.965
Eat up those baby backs, guys.

1796
01:33:59.884 --> 01:34:04.806
How do you take care of everybody
and never worry about yourself?

1797
01:34:06.015 --> 01:34:07.767
How do you become Sandy?

1798
01:34:07.850 --> 01:34:09.394
Oh, well, listen.

1799
01:34:09.477 --> 01:34:13.064
How do you get to Carnegie Hall?
Practice, practice, practice.

1800
01:34:13.147 --> 01:34:14.774
- Hmm.
- Huh?

1801
01:34:17.610 --> 01:34:19.779
I wish I could stay here.

1802
01:34:19.862 --> 01:34:22.657
This is the best day I've had in years.

1803
01:34:24.326 --> 01:34:27.119
Listen, you can stay
as long as you want.

1804
01:34:28.205 --> 01:34:30.373
I'm supposed to go to New York tomorrow

1805
01:34:30.457 --> 01:34:33.418
and shoot this VH1 thing
with Lenny Kravitz.

1806
01:34:34.168 --> 01:34:35.169
Yeah?

1807
01:34:36.463 --> 01:34:37.755
That's a good thing.

1808
01:34:38.840 --> 01:34:39.841
Is it?

1809
01:34:41.384 --> 01:34:42.719
Then why don't I wanna go?

1810
01:34:48.308 --> 01:34:49.767
Tell me I don't have to go, Sandy.

1811
01:34:51.728 --> 01:34:53.355
No, no, no.

1812
01:34:54.772 --> 01:34:55.898
Why won't you?

1813
01:34:57.400 --> 01:34:59.902
'Cause that's not my job anymore.

1814
01:35:01.070 --> 01:35:02.447
Okay.

1815
01:35:03.281 --> 01:35:04.782
What do you want me to do?

1816
01:35:07.577 --> 01:35:12.457
What I want you to do
is concentrate on your career.

1817
01:35:12.540 --> 01:35:14.208
Music comes first.

1818
01:35:15.418 --> 01:35:17.003
Go to New York.

1819
01:35:21.508 --> 01:35:24.135
- You know what?
- What?

1820
01:35:25.970 --> 01:35:27.555
You're a jerk.

1821
01:35:37.357 --> 01:35:39.150
Oh, God, yes!

1822
01:35:40.360 --> 01:35:41.819
What was that?

1823
01:35:42.695 --> 01:35:45.031
- Firuz!
- Oh, all right, then.

1824
01:35:45.114 --> 01:35:46.824
I'll go take a walk or something.

1825
01:35:47.534 --> 01:35:49.661
Have the best night of your life, Sandy.

1826
01:35:50.787 --> 01:35:52.246
I'm trying.

1827
01:35:54.832 --> 01:35:57.001
Ultimately, I have to move.

1828
01:36:34.664 --> 01:36:37.834
The day was perfect,
the night was better.

1829
01:36:37.917 --> 01:36:40.420
Thank you. I'm off to New York.

1830
01:36:40.503 --> 01:36:42.339
Sandy knows best.

1831
01:36:42.422 --> 01:36:43.673
Love, Court.

1832
01:36:51.305 --> 01:36:54.100
- Pick that up!
- Shut up, Firuz!

1833
01:36:57.311 --> 01:36:58.980
Just shut up.

1834
01:36:59.063 --> 01:37:00.732
Success can be really lonely.

1835
01:37:00.815 --> 01:37:03.443
That's why you kinda long
for someone to share it with.

1836
01:37:03.526 --> 01:37:06.028
So a week later,
her and Lenny Kravitz moved in together.

1837
01:37:06.112 --> 01:37:08.698
And then two weeks later after that,
moved out.

1838
01:37:08.781 --> 01:37:10.116
And she moved on to Johnny Depp.

1839
01:37:10.199 --> 01:37:11.409
- Chris Cornell.
- George Clooney.

1840
01:37:11.493 --> 01:37:13.327
- Ziggy Marley.
- Pauly Shore.

1841
01:37:13.411 --> 01:37:15.037
I went out with her?

1842
01:37:15.121 --> 01:37:17.415
Man, Sandy was messed up.

1843
01:37:18.750 --> 01:37:20.418
Sir, are you committing suicide?

1844
01:37:20.502 --> 01:37:22.504
'Cause I don't think
I'm allowed to film that!

1845
01:37:22.587 --> 01:37:24.213
No, I'm not!

1846
01:37:24.296 --> 01:37:26.466
I'm fine, thank you very much!

1847
01:37:26.549 --> 01:37:30.302
She can date whoever she wants to date!
That's her thing!

1848
01:37:30.387 --> 01:37:32.930
- He's talking to me.
- He's talking to you?

1849
01:37:39.145 --> 01:37:43.232
Sandy, that pool looks far away.
How long until my skin starts burning?

1850
01:37:43.315 --> 01:37:49.155
I think the safety advisor
said four seconds you get

1851
01:37:49.238 --> 01:37:50.990
before you must be wet.

1852
01:37:51.073 --> 01:37:52.825
You think he said that
or he said that? Four?

1853
01:37:52.909 --> 01:37:56.120
I got to admit, I haven't been sleeping.
I'm just so tired.

1854
01:37:56.203 --> 01:37:57.872
I don't care. I'm about
to be lit on fire!

1855
01:37:57.955 --> 01:38:00.332
He said it! He said what he said.

1856
01:38:00.417 --> 01:38:04.336
Okay, here we go. Right calf first.

1857
01:38:04.421 --> 01:38:06.589
Okay. Okay.

1858
01:38:06.672 --> 01:38:09.008
- Okay!
- Okay, go, go, go!

1859
01:38:09.092 --> 01:38:10.968
Whoo! Yeah!

1860
01:38:12.386 --> 01:38:14.346
...What? Oh!

1861
01:38:15.097 --> 01:38:16.641
No!

1862
01:38:19.351 --> 01:38:21.145
No!

1863
01:38:22.146 --> 01:38:25.900
Okay. So birds sleep at night,
but the bats wake up.

1864
01:38:25.983 --> 01:38:27.569
Okay.

1865
01:38:27.652 --> 01:38:30.947
Now we know. Now we know.
No, this is a good thing.

1866
01:38:34.951 --> 01:38:37.286
I'm telling you, Bud,
he can follow anybody.

1867
01:38:37.369 --> 01:38:40.540
He can follow... He followed Minnie
at The Ice House recently.

1868
01:38:40.623 --> 01:38:44.376
I know you don't like The Ice House.
I don't know why I said that. I'm sorry.

1869
01:38:44.461 --> 01:38:46.128
All right, I'm gonna go watch Kevin.

1870
01:38:46.754 --> 01:38:48.673
- Hey, Sandy.
- Kirby.

1871
01:38:48.756 --> 01:38:49.757
You got a minute?

1872
01:38:49.841 --> 01:38:52.635
Yeah, I'm going to watch
my client on stage.

1873
01:38:52.719 --> 01:38:55.387
Actually, Kevin and I think
it's time for a change.

1874
01:38:55.472 --> 01:38:56.931
He's dumping me through you?

1875
01:38:57.014 --> 01:38:59.601
You gotta admit, you've been
a bit clingy. I'm telling ya.

1876
01:38:59.684 --> 01:39:01.018
You're telling me? I'm telling you.

1877
01:39:01.102 --> 01:39:02.186
So we agree.

1878
01:39:03.605 --> 01:39:07.233
Bud, Alex, how are you guys?
Good to see you.

1879
01:39:07.316 --> 01:39:09.318
It's all happening
here tonight, isn't it?

1880
01:39:15.116 --> 01:39:19.161
♪ You give me butterfly, butterflies ♪

1881
01:39:19.245 --> 01:39:21.372
♪ Down in my soul ♪

1882
01:39:22.081 --> 01:39:24.125
♪ Butterflies, butterfly ♪

1883
01:39:24.876 --> 01:39:26.628
Why the hell do you
have me singing that song?

1884
01:39:26.711 --> 01:39:28.379
- They hated it!
- No.

1885
01:39:28.462 --> 01:39:29.922
This is an awful idea, Sandy!

1886
01:39:30.006 --> 01:39:33.217
No, I... I'm telling you,
you did better than you think!

1887
01:39:33.300 --> 01:39:36.262
- You are out of your mind!
- No! No!

1888
01:39:36.345 --> 01:39:37.805
- I'm sorry.
- No, don't.

1889
01:39:37.889 --> 01:39:40.016
- It's time you go night-night.
- No night-night! No!

1890
01:39:40.099 --> 01:39:42.434
- You're fired.
- Oh, God! Come on!

1891
01:39:42.519 --> 01:39:45.897
No! You can't do that to me! Aah!

1892
01:39:48.566 --> 01:39:50.234
We're done, Sandy. We're done!

1893
01:39:50.317 --> 01:39:51.402
Don't say that.

1894
01:39:56.783 --> 01:39:58.576
Your life is an adventure.

1895
01:39:58.660 --> 01:40:00.286
You don't want to miss a single moment.

1896
01:40:00.369 --> 01:40:03.414
- This girl's the new Grace Kelly.
- Now, you don't have to.

1897
01:40:03.497 --> 01:40:07.835
Vag-Eze, America's number one
vaginal discharge ointment.

1898
01:40:07.919 --> 01:40:10.672
Side effects include dryness,
burning, itching, fallopian tube...

1899
01:40:10.755 --> 01:40:13.591
- What's vaginal discharge?
- Can I have some?

1900
01:40:14.175 --> 01:40:17.094
You said it was
a coffee commercial, Sandy!

1901
01:40:18.971 --> 01:40:21.140
What the hell is going on here?

1902
01:40:24.310 --> 01:40:28.064
Please, God, I need a miracle.

1903
01:40:38.282 --> 01:40:44.789
"Remember, kids,
if you laugh when you are blue,

1904
01:40:44.872 --> 01:40:46.958
the sun...

1905
01:40:47.041 --> 01:40:50.127
...will always shine on you.

1906
01:40:51.420 --> 01:40:54.298
Honk, honk.

1907
01:40:55.883 --> 01:40:58.469
Mr. Buttons."

1908
01:41:29.250 --> 01:41:30.251
Teddy!

1909
01:41:31.794 --> 01:41:35.256
Wonderful news. Mr. Buttons is dead!

1910
01:41:36.758 --> 01:41:38.259
You killed him?

1911
01:41:38.342 --> 01:41:41.470
No! He hung himself!

1912
01:41:41.553 --> 01:41:44.641
- Really?
- His time slot's open, guys.

1913
01:41:44.724 --> 01:41:46.267
I got you the audition.

1914
01:41:46.350 --> 01:41:48.853
It doesn't feel right.
I mean, I feel bad for the guy.

1915
01:41:48.936 --> 01:41:50.938
Screw Mr. Buttons! It's our turn!

1916
01:41:51.022 --> 01:41:55.109
- He couldn't take the pressure.
- He took the coward's way out.

1917
01:41:55.192 --> 01:41:59.446
I gotta tell you, it's the first time
I... I agree with the puppets.

1918
01:42:03.575 --> 01:42:06.203
Friend Boom Boom is gonna
sing a song for us today, kids.

1919
01:42:06.287 --> 01:42:07.830
Would you like that?
Would you like to hear it?

1920
01:42:09.623 --> 01:42:10.875
I hate singing.

1921
01:42:10.958 --> 01:42:13.419
What are you talking about?
You sing all the time.

1922
01:42:13.502 --> 01:42:15.838
You sing in the car,
you sing in the shower...

1923
01:42:15.922 --> 01:42:17.674
You spy on me in the shower?

1924
01:42:19.133 --> 01:42:22.178
- That is not what I meant.
- I can sing, Ted.

1925
01:42:22.261 --> 01:42:25.431
- Would you like to hear that, kids?
- Yeah!

1926
01:42:31.478 --> 01:42:33.189
You have something
in your throat, Heather?

1927
01:42:33.272 --> 01:42:34.565
Yeah, your hand, dummy!

1928
01:42:38.485 --> 01:42:41.030
I can't believe it.
These kids are eating your boy up!

1929
01:42:41.113 --> 01:42:42.573
I mean, he could be the next Buttons.

1930
01:42:42.656 --> 01:42:44.909
- Didn't I tell you? Didn't I say?
- Yeah, great.

1931
01:42:44.992 --> 01:42:47.536
Hey! There's a caterpillar on your face.

1932
01:42:48.788 --> 01:42:50.372
What's with you?
What, are you okay?

1933
01:42:50.456 --> 01:42:53.084
- No, no, I, uh...
- Something wrong? There's something wrong?

1934
01:42:53.167 --> 01:42:56.462
Maybe a little dizzy.
I had too many bacon bits this morning.

1935
01:42:56.545 --> 01:42:59.548
Bacon Bits? What is that?
That's a dog food, no?

1936
01:42:59.631 --> 01:43:01.801
No. Didn't say that on the box.

1937
01:43:01.884 --> 01:43:05.346
Yeah, all right, whatever. Tell you what,
you come to my office in an hour.

1938
01:43:05.429 --> 01:43:06.889
We'll hammer out a deal.

1939
01:43:06.973 --> 01:43:10.059
I'll get your boy on the air ASAP.
Okay, bud?

1940
01:43:10.142 --> 01:43:13.062
All righty. That makes me very happy.

1941
01:43:15.606 --> 01:43:17.316
They absolutely loved you.

1942
01:43:17.399 --> 01:43:19.902
- You're getting the job, Teddy.
- I did good. I did good.

1943
01:43:19.986 --> 01:43:23.697
My only fear is they're gonna try
to lowball you on the deal, all right?

1944
01:43:23.781 --> 01:43:26.242
The key to this meeting is tough talk.

1945
01:43:26.909 --> 01:43:30.913
These TV jerks only respond
to bullying and aggression.

1946
01:43:30.997 --> 01:43:33.540
Well, I'll let you
handle all that, okay?

1947
01:43:35.001 --> 01:43:38.545
I'm no doctor,
but Sandy look like crap on a stick.

1948
01:43:38.629 --> 01:43:40.172
No, I'm fine.

1949
01:43:40.256 --> 01:43:42.674
- Sandy!
- No.

1950
01:43:42.759 --> 01:43:44.718
I think he's having a heart attack.

1951
01:43:44.802 --> 01:43:47.679
We... we gotta get you to a hospital.
Boom Boom, call an ambulance!

1952
01:43:47.764 --> 01:43:54.186
No, Boom Boom. First meeting,
close deal, then hop-ital.

1953
01:43:54.270 --> 01:43:56.438
Forget the meeting.
You can barely speak.

1954
01:43:57.064 --> 01:44:00.401
But... you can.

1955
01:44:03.863 --> 01:44:07.950
So what we saw in there
told us everything we need to know.

1956
01:44:08.617 --> 01:44:11.412
We love Ted. The kids love Ted.

1957
01:44:11.495 --> 01:44:13.122
That is... That's spectacular.

1958
01:44:13.205 --> 01:44:14.748
Thank you.
Thank you so much.

1959
01:44:14.832 --> 01:44:17.919
But the fact is
he's never been on television.

1960
01:44:18.002 --> 01:44:19.670
So here's the deal.

1961
01:44:19.753 --> 01:44:24.801
Six episodes, 15 grand a pop,
and then we see what we do from there.

1962
01:44:31.307 --> 01:44:33.350
Are you kidding me, Marty?

1963
01:44:34.601 --> 01:44:38.189
- What?
- You think I'm a complete a-hole?

1964
01:44:38.272 --> 01:44:39.648
No, no, no.

1965
01:44:39.731 --> 01:44:42.193
Then why are you treating me like one?

1966
01:44:42.776 --> 01:44:45.529
I think it's a reasonable
starting place, Sandy.

1967
01:44:47.239 --> 01:44:50.617
Reasonable, Fishbein? It's dog crap.

1968
01:44:51.202 --> 01:44:52.536
If we take this deal,

1969
01:44:52.619 --> 01:44:56.833
my guy's gonna end up at the end of
a rope just like your last clown.

1970
01:44:57.458 --> 01:44:59.668
- Whoa, man!
- All right. Sandy, Sandy. Take it easy.

1971
01:44:59.751 --> 01:45:02.546
Take it easy. Just make us a counter.

1972
01:45:03.923 --> 01:45:07.969
We want a two year...
Five year deal.

1973
01:45:08.052 --> 01:45:09.136
Sandy, please.

1974
01:45:09.220 --> 01:45:13.057
Twenty-four show minimum,
50 grand an episode,

1975
01:45:13.140 --> 01:45:17.728
with a 200K bump
every year we're on the air.

1976
01:45:18.395 --> 01:45:20.022
This guy's an animal.

1977
01:45:20.106 --> 01:45:21.648
He's literally foaming at the mouth.

1978
01:45:21.732 --> 01:45:24.818
And the puppets get
their own dressing rooms.

1979
01:45:27.113 --> 01:45:28.197
Just kidding.

1980
01:45:29.365 --> 01:45:30.491
Okay.

1981
01:45:30.574 --> 01:45:34.703
Three years, 20 show minimum,
at the numbers you mentioned.

1982
01:45:35.746 --> 01:45:36.788
Deal.

1983
01:45:36.873 --> 01:45:40.584
Ted, welcome to the UPN family.

1984
01:45:46.798 --> 01:45:52.304
And that's how Sandy died.
On the conference room floor at UPN.

1985
01:45:54.056 --> 01:45:55.975
Just kidding.
They took him to the hospital.

1986
01:45:57.434 --> 01:45:58.853
Where am I?

1987
01:45:58.936 --> 01:46:01.898
You had a minor heart attack.
A warning shot.

1988
01:46:02.606 --> 01:46:05.109
Probably due to stress. And meat.

1989
01:46:05.192 --> 01:46:08.237
Just need to rest for a few days.
Here you go.

1990
01:46:13.700 --> 01:46:18.872
This is too nice of a room for me.
I can't afford this.

1991
01:46:18.956 --> 01:46:23.002
Come on, man. I wasn't gonna let you
slum it down in the regular people ward.

1992
01:46:23.085 --> 01:46:25.796
First class all the way for my Sandman.

1993
01:46:25.879 --> 01:46:28.340
- You came!
- Of course.

1994
01:46:28.424 --> 01:46:30.842
Miss Clarke, I love your new album.

1995
01:46:30.927 --> 01:46:32.511
I play it every day.
I'm obsessed with it.

1996
01:46:32.594 --> 01:46:33.595
Thank you.

1997
01:46:33.679 --> 01:46:34.888
- You're so beautiful.
- Thank you.

1998
01:46:34.972 --> 01:46:37.016
Can I touch you?

1999
01:46:38.767 --> 01:46:41.395
Oh, I... I...
I just touched the queen!

2000
01:46:41.478 --> 01:46:45.357
Oh, and you, sir, you need a new bedpan,
so I'm gonna grab that for you.

2001
01:46:45.441 --> 01:46:48.319
- I used the bedpan while I was sleeping?
- Thanks.

2002
01:46:49.903 --> 01:46:51.822
You did a new album?

2003
01:46:51.905 --> 01:46:55.534
Oh. Don't you worry about that. I want
you to worry about getting better.

2004
01:46:56.243 --> 01:46:59.371
It's scary, knowing
your heart's not good.

2005
01:46:59.455 --> 01:47:04.668
Sandy Wexler, you have
the biggest, best, strongest heart

2006
01:47:04.751 --> 01:47:08.422
in this whole miserable town.
And that's a fact.

2007
01:47:08.505 --> 01:47:10.216
Miserable town?

2008
01:47:10.299 --> 01:47:13.594
It's been quite nice to you,
thank you very much.

2009
01:47:13.677 --> 01:47:14.971
I guess.

2010
01:47:15.054 --> 01:47:17.264
I just feel like I need a change,
you know?

2011
01:47:19.016 --> 01:47:20.892
So I'm moving to Seattle.

2012
01:47:20.977 --> 01:47:23.895
Seattle? What are you talking about?

2013
01:47:23.980 --> 01:47:30.277
That whole grunge thing, that's old hat.
Why would you go there?

2014
01:47:31.195 --> 01:47:34.865
The guy I'm marrying lives there.

2015
01:47:37.743 --> 01:47:39.328
You're getting married?

2016
01:47:41.080 --> 01:47:42.498
Yeah.

2017
01:47:42.581 --> 01:47:44.750
Saturday, in Malibu.

2018
01:47:44.833 --> 01:47:48.462
His name is Eric Lamonsoff.
He's not in show business.

2019
01:47:48.545 --> 01:47:50.964
He owns a chain of coffee stores.

2020
01:47:51.048 --> 01:47:54.593
A store that just sells coffee?
I don't know.

2021
01:47:54.676 --> 01:47:56.720
That ain't gonna work, kid.

2022
01:47:57.554 --> 01:48:00.557
I just need a... a break from the music.

2023
01:48:01.142 --> 01:48:05.021
But singing's the only thing
that makes you happy.

2024
01:48:05.104 --> 01:48:08.357
Yeah, but I'm looking for something else
to make me happy.

2025
01:48:10.484 --> 01:48:11.902
'Cause that's not it anymore.

2026
01:48:15.239 --> 01:48:18.784
Miss Clarke, I'm so sorry to bother you,
but would you?

2027
01:48:18.867 --> 01:48:20.119
Sure.

2028
01:48:20.202 --> 01:48:22.913
Is that the record? Can you play it?

2029
01:48:22.996 --> 01:48:25.041
- Is there a player in the room?
- Yeah.

2030
01:48:26.083 --> 01:48:27.959
I gotta hear this.

2031
01:48:34.841 --> 01:48:36.718
You were always there for me.

2032
01:48:39.430 --> 01:48:40.764
Even when you weren't.

2033
01:48:49.606 --> 01:48:50.982
Goodbye, Sandy.

2034
01:49:00.617 --> 01:49:04.413
♪ My world had no room for dreams ♪

2035
01:49:04.496 --> 01:49:06.832
♪ When you found me ♪

2036
01:49:08.625 --> 01:49:11.878
♪ I was happy just floating downstream ♪

2037
01:49:11.962 --> 01:49:15.882
♪ That's when you found me ♪

2038
01:49:16.758 --> 01:49:21.388
♪ Life was passing me by
But you told me to fly ♪

2039
01:49:21.472 --> 01:49:24.683
♪ I thought that I was invisible ♪

2040
01:49:24.766 --> 01:49:28.687
♪ But you saw me ♪

2041
01:49:28.770 --> 01:49:35.236
♪ Yeah, you saw me ♪

2042
01:49:35.819 --> 01:49:39.698
♪ And I'm gonna love you ♪

2043
01:49:39.781 --> 01:49:43.869
♪ In the rain or shine
Till the end of time ♪

2044
01:49:43.952 --> 01:49:47.956
♪ Let you know that I need you ♪

2045
01:49:48.039 --> 01:49:52.586
♪ You're my everything
The reason I sing ♪

2046
01:49:52.669 --> 01:49:56.132
♪ Just take me away
Give me love ♪

2047
01:49:56.215 --> 01:49:59.718
♪ The northern lights
And the stars above... ♪

2048
01:49:59.801 --> 01:50:02.804
♪ ...went wandering far and near ♪

2049
01:50:02.888 --> 01:50:07.100
♪ But in every place
They said to his face now ♪

2050
01:50:07.184 --> 01:50:09.353
♪ Get out of here ♪

2051
01:50:09.936 --> 01:50:12.564
♪ Get out, get out ♪

2052
01:50:12.648 --> 01:50:14.233
I love this song.

2053
01:50:14.858 --> 01:50:16.402
This guy's butchering it.

2054
01:50:19.780 --> 01:50:20.864
Alfred?

2055
01:50:22.241 --> 01:50:24.993
Wow. Nobody's called me that in years.

2056
01:50:25.994 --> 01:50:27.329
Good to see you, Sandy.

2057
01:50:27.413 --> 01:50:30.081
Hey, what are you doing here?

2058
01:50:30.166 --> 01:50:32.626
Well, this is where
I get all my best ideas.

2059
01:50:32.709 --> 01:50:34.127
Well, here and the radio.

2060
01:50:34.211 --> 01:50:36.922
Yeah, you... you've been on such a roll.

2061
01:50:37.005 --> 01:50:40.842
From "My Bologna"
to "Pretty Fly for a Rabbi."

2062
01:50:40.926 --> 01:50:42.969
Just great. Clever stuff.

2063
01:50:43.053 --> 01:50:45.681
Oh, thanks, man. Well, you know,
you're the one who put it all together.

2064
01:50:45.764 --> 01:50:47.724
...Remember what you told me?

2065
01:50:47.808 --> 01:50:49.268
- Stick with the accordion.
- Uh-huh.

2066
01:50:49.351 --> 01:50:51.270
Only wear Hawaiian shirts.

2067
01:50:51.353 --> 01:50:54.022
Do funny words to other people's songs.

2068
01:50:54.105 --> 01:50:55.399
- Genius.
- Huh?

2069
01:50:55.482 --> 01:50:59.611
I'm glad. I'm glad it all worked out
for you. I really am. Sincerely.

2070
01:50:59.695 --> 01:51:03.490
Thank you, man. Well, I'm just sorry
that we couldn't have done it together.

2071
01:51:04.074 --> 01:51:05.992
Hey, listen. I got too close.

2072
01:51:06.076 --> 01:51:08.745
Our friendship was getting
in the way of our business.

2073
01:51:08.829 --> 01:51:10.706
You did what you had to do.

2074
01:51:10.789 --> 01:51:13.834
Wait a minute.
Is that what you think happened?

2075
01:51:13.917 --> 01:51:15.168
That is what happened.

2076
01:51:15.252 --> 01:51:17.921
- You thought we got too close?
- Yeah.

2077
01:51:18.004 --> 01:51:20.632
- No, Sandy.
- That's not why I left you.

2078
01:51:20.716 --> 01:51:24.052
I left you because you
could never tell me the truth.

2079
01:51:24.720 --> 01:51:26.347
What? That's ridiculous!

2080
01:51:26.430 --> 01:51:29.015
Tell me one time
I didn't tell you the truth.

2081
01:51:30.434 --> 01:51:33.061
You told me we could copyright
the word "weird."

2082
01:51:33.144 --> 01:51:36.857
No, I said it was weird
that we couldn't copyright it.

2083
01:51:36.940 --> 01:51:39.651
You... Come on. You were hearing
what you want to hear.

2084
01:51:39.735 --> 01:51:42.070
Sandy, you tell people
what you think they want to hear.

2085
01:51:42.153 --> 01:51:44.656
- I don't agree.
- No, look.

2086
01:51:44.740 --> 01:51:50.537
For me, if you really care about
someone, you tell 'em the truth.

2087
01:51:59.630 --> 01:52:01.047
You're right, Alfred.

2088
01:52:02.508 --> 01:52:04.426
Damn it, you're 100% right.

2089
01:52:05.969 --> 01:52:08.972
- Your hair looks good, by the way.
- Thanks, man, I...

2090
01:52:09.848 --> 01:52:13.310
- You're lying again.
- I am. It looks like dirty spaghetti.

2091
01:52:13.394 --> 01:52:16.062
I gotta stop. I'm gonna stop!

2092
01:52:16.146 --> 01:52:18.023
- I'm gonna stop, Alfred.
- You should.

2093
01:52:22.403 --> 01:52:25.614
Hey! Hey! You suck!

2094
01:52:25.697 --> 01:52:28.284
You know what?
Real funny, Weird Al.

2095
01:52:28.367 --> 01:52:32.371
Why don't you make me laugh one time
without using somebody else's music?

2096
01:52:32.454 --> 01:52:33.580
Get off of me.

2097
01:52:34.831 --> 01:52:38.168
I'd like to book a space
for a private event.

2098
01:52:38.251 --> 01:52:42.714
No! No! Don't tell me it's impossible!
Everything's negotiable!

2099
01:52:48.304 --> 01:52:51.515
Put it on your calendar, Ted.
Okay? Don't be late.

2100
01:52:51.598 --> 01:52:53.058
I think we'll be busy.

2101
01:52:53.141 --> 01:52:54.435
- I'm not talking to you.
- Hey!

2102
01:52:54.518 --> 01:52:55.644
I'm talking to Ted!

2103
01:52:55.727 --> 01:52:57.938
- Okay. We'll be there.
- What's his problem?

2104
01:52:58.021 --> 01:52:59.773
I don't know. Just do what he says.

2105
01:53:09.366 --> 01:53:12.786
It's an international call,
so talk fast, okay?

2106
01:53:13.537 --> 01:53:14.746
Can I count on you?

2107
01:53:15.789 --> 01:53:16.790
Perfect.

2108
01:53:16.873 --> 01:53:18.709
And you have a valid driver's license?

2109
01:53:23.380 --> 01:53:24.631
How am I looking?

2110
01:53:24.715 --> 01:53:26.174
You actually look good, Sandy.

2111
01:53:26.257 --> 01:53:27.759
That surprises you?

2112
01:53:32.263 --> 01:53:34.891
- Courtney, your limo is here.
- It's showtime, girl.

2113
01:53:34.975 --> 01:53:37.519
Wow. Um, it's early.
I'll be right down, guys.

2114
01:53:48.071 --> 01:53:50.366
It's a big day, Miss Courtney Clarke.

2115
01:53:51.282 --> 01:53:52.618
The biggest.

2116
01:53:52.701 --> 01:53:55.328
- You look very beautiful.
- Thanks.

2117
01:53:55.412 --> 01:53:56.747
How is traffic out there?

2118
01:53:56.830 --> 01:54:00.166
Traffic's not a problem.
You sit back, relax.

2119
01:54:03.462 --> 01:54:05.422
Let Firuz take good care of you.

2120
01:54:09.926 --> 01:54:12.303
Sir, I think you missed our turn.

2121
01:54:12.388 --> 01:54:13.764
No, no, no, no.

2122
01:54:13.847 --> 01:54:15.891
That was a thing that on purpose I did.

2123
01:54:16.558 --> 01:54:18.935
We're going shortcut.

2124
01:54:37.746 --> 01:54:39.540
What are we doing here?

2125
01:54:39.623 --> 01:54:41.917
Please, miss, go inside.

2126
01:54:42.876 --> 01:54:44.545
I'm going inside to call the police.

2127
01:55:21.372 --> 01:55:22.416
Sandy?

2128
01:55:23.459 --> 01:55:26.503
Just you and me
under the stars again, kid.

2129
01:55:26.587 --> 01:55:30.340
- Yeah, but now's not exactly a good time.
- I know.

2130
01:55:30.424 --> 01:55:35.512
And I have no right to say to you what I'm
gonna say, but I'm gonna do it anyway.

2131
01:55:36.888 --> 01:55:39.516
You like making trouble,
don't you, Sandy?

2132
01:55:39.600 --> 01:55:41.727
Look, here's the thing.

2133
01:55:41.810 --> 01:55:46.773
Maybe sometimes I got a way of telling
people what I think they want to hear,

2134
01:55:46.857 --> 01:55:49.735
rather than what I'm really thinking.

2135
01:55:49.818 --> 01:55:53.989
So I was thinking, if I started
saying the stuff that I think,

2136
01:55:54.698 --> 01:55:58.368
maybe I'm gonna find out that's actually
what the people wanted to hear.

2137
01:55:59.119 --> 01:56:01.246
Oh, shit, Sandy.
You mixed up your pills.

2138
01:56:01.913 --> 01:56:05.917
What I'm trying to say is this
Eric Lamonsoff guy is wrong for you.

2139
01:56:06.001 --> 01:56:10.171
Just like Bling was the wrong guy
and Lenny Kravitz.

2140
01:56:10.255 --> 01:56:14.843
Marc Anthony. And Prince.
And Apollonia.

2141
01:56:15.426 --> 01:56:18.429
Dennis Rodman,
who's great on the boards, but...

2142
01:56:18.514 --> 01:56:20.682
You dated Dennis Rodman?
Good Lord.

2143
01:56:21.725 --> 01:56:23.143
Dad, what are you doing here?

2144
01:56:23.226 --> 01:56:25.395
Sandy's gettin' to that part.
You just listen.

2145
01:56:25.479 --> 01:56:27.105
Yeah, thank you, Willy.

2146
01:56:27.814 --> 01:56:29.315
All right, here's the deal.

2147
01:56:30.526 --> 01:56:34.029
All those guys were chasing you
because you're incredible.

2148
01:56:34.112 --> 01:56:37.198
But none of them
really know who you are.

2149
01:56:38.617 --> 01:56:39.993
Who am I, Sandy?

2150
01:56:40.076 --> 01:56:42.120
You're Courtney Clarke.

2151
01:56:43.204 --> 01:56:45.666
The beautiful swan from Magic Mountain.

2152
01:56:46.667 --> 01:56:48.794
Now, I wouldn't tell you to break a deal

2153
01:56:48.877 --> 01:56:52.297
unless I thought there was
a better offer out there for you.

2154
01:56:52.964 --> 01:56:55.592
- Is there a better offer?
- Oh, absolutely.

2155
01:56:55.676 --> 01:56:58.094
There's an aggressive offer out there.

2156
01:56:58.178 --> 01:57:04.225
There's a guy who's willing to be devoted
to you 100% for your entire life.

2157
01:57:04.309 --> 01:57:08.396
A guy who will make all the tough
phone calls, fight all the big fights.

2158
01:57:08.479 --> 01:57:10.941
A guy who will never doubt you.

2159
01:57:11.024 --> 01:57:12.901
Even when you doubt yourself.

2160
01:57:13.777 --> 01:57:14.778
Keep going.

2161
01:57:14.861 --> 01:57:19.783
He has surprisingly muscular quads
due to the ThighMaster.

2162
01:57:21.451 --> 01:57:23.411
But what does this guy want in return?

2163
01:57:23.494 --> 01:57:26.414
All he wants in return
is for you to be you,

2164
01:57:26.497 --> 01:57:30.418
just the way you are,
because he loves you.

2165
01:57:31.628 --> 01:57:32.754
I love you.

2166
01:57:34.923 --> 01:57:36.758
I've always loved you.

2167
01:57:38.802 --> 01:57:40.596
You're my star, Courtney.

2168
01:57:42.055 --> 01:57:44.140
I love you, too, Sandy.

2169
01:57:45.726 --> 01:57:48.269
I should have told you the truth
so long ago.

2170
01:57:48.353 --> 01:57:51.272
Listen, I dye my hair.

2171
01:57:51.982 --> 01:57:54.943
And I also apologize to my clothes
if I don't wear 'em enough.

2172
01:57:55.026 --> 01:57:56.903
- No more truth.
- Absolutely.

2173
01:57:56.987 --> 01:57:58.446
Just kiss me.

2174
01:57:59.573 --> 01:58:02.743
Save that kiss. I came
all the way down here for a wedding.

2175
01:58:02.826 --> 01:58:05.411
- Let's get to it.
- Yeah, let's not get him mad.

2176
01:58:05.495 --> 01:58:06.830
Yeah, you're right.

2177
01:58:07.998 --> 01:58:11.877
Boom Boom is ordained
as an interdenominational minister.

2178
01:58:11.960 --> 01:58:13.795
Or we also have...

2179
01:58:14.545 --> 01:58:16.506
Hey. Shalom.

2180
01:58:17.215 --> 01:58:18.466
There he is.

2181
01:58:18.549 --> 01:58:20.218
What do you say, kid?

2182
01:58:21.177 --> 01:58:22.553
Will you marry me?

2183
01:58:22.638 --> 01:58:24.472
You had me at "shalom."

2184
01:58:26.642 --> 01:58:31.271
♪ I prefer you to remain a Christian ♪

2185
01:58:31.354 --> 01:58:34.482
No, no, no. That's fine.
Either way, I'm good.

2186
01:58:40.906 --> 01:58:44.618
Meanwhile, Eric Lamonsoff
was across town waiting at the altar.

2187
01:58:44.701 --> 01:58:45.786
And don't feel sorry for him.

2188
01:58:45.869 --> 01:58:47.788
That whole coffee thing
worked out just great.

2189
01:58:47.871 --> 01:58:51.041
Plus, he ended up marrying
Downtown Julie Brown.

2190
01:58:51.124 --> 01:58:52.125
- Honey?
- What?

2191
01:58:52.208 --> 01:58:54.294
- You got a little schmutz, right there.
- Thank you. Thank you.

2192
01:58:54.377 --> 01:58:55.921
Something had clicked with Sandy.

2193
01:58:56.004 --> 01:58:59.800
And he started reaching out
one by one to his old clients.

2194
01:58:59.883 --> 01:59:01.592
And because he started
telling them the truth...

2195
01:59:02.260 --> 01:59:04.304
most of them ended up
having pretty big careers.

2196
01:59:04.387 --> 01:59:06.056
- I signed with him.
- I signed with him.

2197
01:59:06.139 --> 01:59:08.516
- I signed with him.
- We signed with him.

2198
01:59:08.599 --> 01:59:11.311
And of course, I went back to Sandy.

2199
01:59:11.394 --> 01:59:13.647
He's my manager and
my best friend again.

2200
01:59:13.730 --> 01:59:17.400
Too bad a wedding officiated
by a puppet was not legal.

2201
01:59:17.483 --> 01:59:21.321
Which is why, 20 years later,
they're finally making it real.

2202
01:59:21.404 --> 01:59:24.700
- There he is!
- Yeah! How y'all doing?

2203
01:59:30.706 --> 01:59:33.667
Show business wealth is good,
but it's not real wealth.

2204
01:59:33.750 --> 01:59:35.669
- It's not...
- Hey, shot, man?

2205
01:59:35.752 --> 01:59:37.628
- Let's do a shot? Oh, all right.
- I'm good. I'm good.

2206
01:59:37.713 --> 01:59:41.132
- Hey!
- Oh, my God! Hi!

2207
01:59:42.467 --> 01:59:43.468
I'm sorry, what?

2208
01:59:44.928 --> 01:59:47.638
I'm sorry, man.
I can't understand a word you're saying.

2209
01:59:47.723 --> 01:59:49.349
No, seriously, I got nothing.

2210
01:59:55.063 --> 01:59:58.649
All right. Hello. Hello. Hello.
Hi, guys.

2211
01:59:58.734 --> 02:00:00.068
Oh, thank you, Sandy.

2212
02:00:00.151 --> 02:00:02.612
All these years in the business,
he's got me working a wedding.

2213
02:00:02.696 --> 02:00:06.157
This is fantastic. He booked me
in a tent, really is what it is.

2214
02:00:06.950 --> 02:00:09.786
Said if I do good here,
I get a yurt next year.

2215
02:00:12.455 --> 02:00:15.541
No, um... that was, uh,
some ceremony, too.

2216
02:00:15.625 --> 02:00:18.003
It was a... It was a little awkward,
the priest and the rabbi together.

2217
02:00:18.086 --> 02:00:19.129
That's always a...

2218
02:00:19.212 --> 02:00:21.840
The rabbi, he was, like, Googling,
"Who's Jesus Christ?"

2219
02:00:21.923 --> 02:00:23.008
But that's okay.

2220
02:00:24.885 --> 02:00:26.511
Uh, what else is going on?

2221
02:00:26.594 --> 02:00:29.765
- Just bring out the couple already.
- Yeah, quit doing your act.

2222
02:00:29.848 --> 02:00:31.432
You're right.
Okay.

2223
02:00:31.516 --> 02:00:37.563
Please welcome, for the first time ever,
Mr. and Mrs. Sandy and Courtney Wexler.

2224
02:00:56.416 --> 02:00:57.959
Dad. Bye.

2225
02:01:09.888 --> 02:01:12.015
- Sing! Sing!
- Do it, girl!

2226
02:01:19.355 --> 02:01:20.899
Oh.

2227
02:01:20.982 --> 02:01:23.526
Hey, hey, it could be worse.
He could be eating.

2228
02:01:25.862 --> 02:01:32.743
♪ There's no business like show business
Like no business I know ♪

2229
02:01:32.828 --> 02:01:36.247
♪ Everything about it is appealing ♪

2230
02:01:36.331 --> 02:01:39.292
♪ Everything that traffic will allow ♪

2231
02:01:39.375 --> 02:01:42.170
♪ Nowhere can you get
That happy feeling ♪

2232
02:01:42.253 --> 02:01:45.882
♪ When you are stealing that extra bow ♪

2233
02:01:45.966 --> 02:01:49.760
♪ There's no people like show people ♪

2234
02:01:49.845 --> 02:01:52.472
♪ They smile when they are low ♪

2235
02:01:52.555 --> 02:01:54.057
He's so happy.

2236
02:01:54.140 --> 02:01:56.767
♪ Even with a turkey
That you know will fold ♪

2237
02:01:56.852 --> 02:01:59.980
♪ You may be stranded out in the cold ♪

2238
02:02:00.063 --> 02:02:03.316
♪ Still you wouldn't change it
For a sack of gold ♪

2239
02:02:03.399 --> 02:02:06.611
♪ Let's go on with the show ♪

2240
02:02:06.694 --> 02:02:08.363
I'm embarrassed for him.

2241
02:02:08.446 --> 02:02:10.824
♪ The costumes, the scenery
The makeup, the props ♪

2242
02:02:10.907 --> 02:02:13.827
♪ The audience that lifts you
When you're down ♪

2243
02:02:16.121 --> 02:02:19.958
♪ The headaches, the heartaches
The backaches, the flops ♪

2244
02:02:20.041 --> 02:02:22.502
♪ The sheriff who escorts you
Out of town ♪

2245
02:02:22.585 --> 02:02:24.170
You heard me, Pauly.

2246
02:02:24.254 --> 02:02:26.923
Yes! That's right, you son of a bitch!

2247
02:02:28.508 --> 02:02:31.928
♪ The opening when your heart
Beats like a drum ♪

2248
02:02:32.553 --> 02:02:35.640
♪ The closing
When the customers won't come ♪

2249
02:02:35.723 --> 02:02:37.392
- You've been there.
- Shut up.

2250
02:02:37.475 --> 02:02:43.857
♪ There's no business like show business
Like no business I know ♪

2251
02:02:43.940 --> 02:02:45.441
Oh! Oh! Oh!

2252
02:02:45.525 --> 02:02:48.403
♪ Traveling through the country
Will be thrilling ♪

2253
02:02:48.486 --> 02:02:51.489
♪ Standing out in front
On opening nights ♪

2254
02:02:51.572 --> 02:02:54.868
♪ Smiling as you watch
The theater filling ♪

2255
02:02:54.951 --> 02:02:58.079
♪ And there's your billing
Out in the lights ♪

2256
02:02:58.163 --> 02:03:01.791
♪ There's no people like show people ♪

2257
02:03:01.875 --> 02:03:05.503
♪ They smile when they are low ♪

2258
02:03:05.586 --> 02:03:08.589
♪ Yesterday they told you
You would not go far ♪

2259
02:03:08.673 --> 02:03:12.302
♪ That night you open
and there you are ♪

2260
02:03:12.385 --> 02:03:15.763
♪ Next day on your dressing room
They've hung a star ♪

2261
02:03:15.846 --> 02:03:22.728
♪ Let's go on with the show ♪

2262
02:03:25.273 --> 02:03:32.155
♪ Let's go on with the show ♪

2263
02:03:42.248 --> 02:03:47.045
Yeah, every time I ran into Sandy, he used
to say, "I got to meet this Beavis kid.

2264
02:03:47.128 --> 02:03:48.964
Yeah, I want to represent him."

2265
02:03:49.047 --> 02:03:51.632
He didn't understand
that that's a cartoon character.

2266
02:03:51.716 --> 02:03:54.510
You can't really manage
a cartoon character.

2267
02:03:54.594 --> 02:03:57.138
And, uh, he did give me
his number though,

2268
02:03:57.222 --> 02:04:00.183
and, uh, we used to call him
in the middle of the night.

2269
02:04:03.853 --> 02:04:05.605
Wexler Artists.

2270
02:04:05.688 --> 02:04:08.191
Is this Sandy?

2271
02:04:08.274 --> 02:04:10.860
Yeah. Yeah, who... who is this?

2272
02:04:10.944 --> 02:04:12.695
You know who this is.

2273
02:04:12.778 --> 02:04:15.365
No, I don't. That's why I'm asking.

2274
02:04:15.448 --> 02:04:17.742
Guess.

2275
02:04:17.825 --> 02:04:19.785
Are you Gary Busey?

2276
02:04:19.869 --> 02:04:22.497
No way! Dumbass.

2277
02:04:22.580 --> 02:04:24.665
Who? Beavis?

2278
02:04:25.416 --> 02:04:28.794
- You suck!
- What? No, I don't.

2279
02:04:28.878 --> 02:04:30.046
You suck balls.

2280
02:04:30.130 --> 02:04:31.839
No, no, no, no.

2281
02:04:31.922 --> 02:04:33.466
You don't sound so good.

2282
02:04:33.549 --> 02:04:36.594
Now, tell me where you are
and I'll pick you up.

2283
02:04:36.677 --> 02:04:38.263
I'm in your butt.

2284
02:04:38.346 --> 02:04:40.556
What? What's this?

2285
02:04:40.640 --> 02:04:43.601
Yeah, I'm in there right now.

2286
02:04:43.684 --> 02:04:44.852
Hemorrhoids.

2287
02:04:44.935 --> 02:04:48.814
Wait. You get out of my butt.
Get out right now.

2288
02:04:48.898 --> 02:04:50.316
Kill yourself.

2289
02:04:50.400 --> 02:04:54.029
Okay. Okay, that's it.
I'm hanging up the phone.

2290
02:04:57.073 --> 02:04:58.908
Wexler Artists.

2291
02:04:58.992 --> 02:05:00.994
Uh... Sandy Wexler?

2292
02:05:02.120 --> 02:05:03.204
Who is this?

2293
02:05:03.288 --> 02:05:05.873
Uh, this is Butt-Head.

2294
02:05:05.956 --> 02:05:08.668
Oh, hi, Butt-Head.

2295
02:05:08.751 --> 02:05:12.297
Uh, Sandy, I'm calling about Beavis.

2296
02:05:12.380 --> 02:05:16.634
Uh, yeah. Beavis wasn't
too courteous last night, Butt-Head.

2297
02:05:16.717 --> 02:05:18.928
Uh, that's why I'm calling.

2298
02:05:19.012 --> 02:05:20.013
Uh-huh.

2299
02:05:20.096 --> 02:05:22.390
Uh, Beavis wanted to say he's sorry.

2300
02:05:22.473 --> 02:05:25.810
Oh, okay. He is, huh?
He... he's sorry?

2301
02:05:25.893 --> 02:05:29.022
Yeah. Beavis says
he's sorry you're such a dumb-ass.

2302
02:05:29.105 --> 02:05:32.067
What? What's that?
What? What'd you say?

2303
02:05:32.150 --> 02:05:34.152
Uh, and he's also sorry

2304
02:05:34.235 --> 02:05:38.781
that he said your face looks like
a toilet and your balls smell funny.

2305
02:05:39.449 --> 02:05:42.660
Okay, okay.
Well, you tell him I accept.

2306
02:05:42.743 --> 02:05:45.913
Look, you're good kids,
and I like what you're doing.

2307
02:05:45.996 --> 02:05:49.625
I think if you want to get
to the next level, you're gonna...

2308
02:05:49.709 --> 02:05:52.128
- Uh, hang on a second.
- Okay.

2309
02:05:52.212 --> 02:05:53.921
Beavis wants to say something, sir.

2310
02:05:54.004 --> 02:05:56.757
- Oh, okay.
- Hey, this is Beavis.

2311
02:05:56.841 --> 02:05:58.801
Uh... oh, hi, Beavis.

2312
02:06:00.010 --> 02:06:02.012
- Sandy Wexler?
- Yeah.

2313
02:06:02.097 --> 02:06:04.557
Sandy Wexler?

2314
02:06:04.640 --> 02:06:08.561
- Yeah, I know my name.
- Of Wexler Fartists?

2315
02:06:08.644 --> 02:06:11.522
All right. Okay, come on, guys.

2316
02:06:11.606 --> 02:06:15.485
Uh...
You said you wanna come on guys?

2317
02:06:17.153 --> 02:06:18.654
That's it. I'm getting off.

2318
02:06:18.738 --> 02:06:22.200
You said you're getting off.

2319
02:06:22.283 --> 02:06:25.035
All right.
Listen, you sons of bitches.

2320
02:06:25.120 --> 02:06:26.412
I'll find your parents

2321
02:06:26.496 --> 02:06:30.166
and make you wish you never messed
with the king of Hollywood.

2322
02:06:30.250 --> 02:06:32.001
You said "wood."

2323
02:06:32.085 --> 02:06:34.379
All right.
Come on!

2324
02:06:35.505 --> 02:06:36.672
Stop it!

2325
02:06:38.383 --> 02:06:39.550
- All right, good.
- All right.

2326
02:06:39.634 --> 02:06:41.636
...Yeah!