WEBVTT FILE 1 00:00:01.653 --> 00:00:07.575 Camera sounds and struggling sounds 2 00:00:02.000 --> 00:00:07.000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 3 00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:13.000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 4 00:00:08.770 --> 00:00:10.190 Camera lens sound 5 00:00:12.088 --> 00:00:15.190 Camera lens sounds and struggling sounds 6 00:00:25.044 --> 00:00:28.028 Help, help me, oh, no, no, no (garbled) 7 00:00:28.075 --> 00:00:31.596 What makes a work of art a masterpiece? 8 00:00:31.698 --> 00:00:37.455 Who dares to assign finite value to the infinite output of the creative mind? 9 00:00:38.456 --> 00:00:40.253 Beethoven's Fifth Symphony? 10 00:00:41.385 --> 00:00:43.120 Da Vinci's Mona Lisa? 11 00:00:44.143 --> 00:00:46.986 Kubrick's 2001: A Space Odyssey? 12 00:00:48.854 --> 00:00:50.588 Morons! 13 00:01:06.471 --> 00:01:10.299 No, no, no, please. Please, please, no. 14 00:01:11.323 --> 00:01:15.385 No, no, no, please. You don't have to do this... 15 00:01:17.581 --> 00:01:19.393 But of course I do... 16 00:01:20.503 --> 00:01:22.393 Scream and a splatter sound. 17 00:01:27.897 --> 00:01:29.936 (Off screen) Isn't that nice dear? 18 00:01:32.663 --> 00:01:36.163 Christmas music plays throughout 19 00:03:06.261 --> 00:03:09.378 Loud, heavy metal Christmas music plays 20 00:03:23.042 --> 00:03:25.237 (Off screen) Turn the music down. 21 00:03:27.417 --> 00:03:29.604 Can you please turn that down? 22 00:03:30.307 --> 00:03:32.456 Will you turn the music down? 23 00:03:33.736 --> 00:03:35.931 Turn the music down! 24 00:03:36.681 --> 00:03:38.306 Turn the music down! 25 00:03:38.376 --> 00:03:39.861 Are you trying to wake the dead? 26 00:03:43.369 --> 00:03:44.689 Thank you 27 00:03:45.970 --> 00:03:47.978 Why is this faucet leaking? 28 00:03:49.183 --> 00:03:52.715 You know we can't afford a big water bill right now. 29 00:03:53.324 --> 00:03:55.785 I'm just concerned about you dear. 30 00:03:55.840 --> 00:03:59.551 Well, right after the honeymoon and right before the holidays... 31 00:04:00.215 --> 00:04:01.925 You don't have to worry about me babe. 32 00:04:02.010 --> 00:04:04.088 Well, I'm glad to see you confident. 33 00:04:04.113 --> 00:04:06.752 But it's not going to be easy to find a job. 34 00:04:06.870 --> 00:04:10.792 Or a tree for that matter, right before the holidays. 35 00:04:11.432 --> 00:04:15.213 I suppose I could just start working on my master piece instead. 36 00:04:15.940 --> 00:04:18.963 You know what I've always said about that fraud Michelangelo 37 00:04:19.299 --> 00:04:23.393 That's nice dear, but I hope you'll start looking for a job soon... 38 00:04:23.651 --> 00:04:28.424 You know what my grandfather used to say... A man without a job is like a leaky faucet. 39 00:04:34.973 --> 00:04:37.746 Thanks for the call, Naomi, I hope I was able to help. 40 00:04:37.771 --> 00:04:40.746 And I want to inform all our listeners that it's perfectly normal... 41 00:04:40.778 --> 00:04:43.482 To feel stressed out this time of year. 42 00:04:43.909 --> 00:04:46.994 The holidays can be a lot of fun, but they can also... 43 00:04:47.034 --> 00:04:49.713 Bring a lot of baggage along with the cheer. 44 00:04:50.635 --> 00:04:53.205 This is Talk Time, the area's top rated psychology show 45 00:04:53.244 --> 00:04:57.540 Brought to you by the Pizza Dude, he's got the biggest slice on the block. 46 00:04:57.565 --> 00:05:01.533 I'm your host, Doctor Brenda Dobbs and we're coming to you live... 47 00:05:01.612 --> 00:05:03.870 On WKIX, Kicks AM. 48 00:05:04.307 --> 00:05:07.150 We're gonna go back to the phones right after these important messages... 49 00:05:07.174 --> 00:05:11.557 If you need help, remember that I care and I'm always listening. 50 00:05:12.198 --> 00:05:15.549 We're just a quick call away at 1-800-987-WKIX... 51 00:05:15.574 --> 00:05:18.549 That's 1-800-987-9549. 52 00:05:18.581 --> 00:05:22.900 I'm Doctor Brenda and Talk Time will be right back. 53 00:05:30.698 --> 00:05:32.112 Phone ringing... 54 00:05:32.729 --> 00:05:35.604 Phone ringing, then hold music... 55 00:05:35.667 --> 00:05:39.557 Hold music, recorded voice saying "We appreciate your call, please stand by..." 56 00:05:39.612 --> 00:05:42.581 "We appreciate your call, please stand by..." 57 00:05:42.768 --> 00:05:47.065 "We appreciate your call, please stand by..." 58 00:05:48.533 --> 00:05:50.791 Thank you for holding, we appreciate your patience... 59 00:05:50.838 --> 00:05:52.143 how may I direct your call? 60 00:05:52.643 --> 00:05:55.745 Hello, can I speak to Brenda Dobbs, on air, please? 61 00:05:56.447 --> 00:05:57.448 Who? 62 00:05:58.510 --> 00:05:59.846 Brenda Dobbs! 63 00:05:59.871 --> 00:06:00.494 Who? 64 00:06:00.518 --> 00:06:03.440 Brenda Dobbs, the radio psychiatrist! 65 00:06:03.596 --> 00:06:06.143 Oh, Doctor Brenda. I see... 66 00:06:06.588 --> 00:06:09.651 Yes, Brenda Dobbs. Can you please put me through? 67 00:06:09.862 --> 00:06:11.190 It's very important. 68 00:06:11.549 --> 00:06:14.870 I'm sorry sir, but can you please hold? There's another call coming in. 69 00:06:14.916 --> 00:06:16.503 (Hold music resumes...) 70 00:06:25.471 --> 00:06:27.580 (Operator returns) Thank you for holding Christian... 71 00:06:27.643 --> 00:06:31.260 I just need to review a few security questions to verify your account. 72 00:06:31.432 --> 00:06:33.956 How do you know my name? I called you. 73 00:06:34.338 --> 00:06:37.042 I'm not sure what you mean, sir. Am I speaking with Christian? 74 00:06:37.182 --> 00:06:40.471 Yes, this is Christian. Who am I speaking to? 75 00:06:40.690 --> 00:06:42.065 I called you! 76 00:06:42.198 --> 00:06:44.628 This is the Federated Collection Agency, sir. 77 00:06:44.729 --> 00:06:48.854 We need to discuss the options to eliminate your outstanding balances. 78 00:06:49.098 --> 00:06:52.004 I can see that they're very high. Very high indeed. 79 00:06:52.051 --> 00:06:54.496 Can you confirm your address for me please, sir? 80 00:06:55.231 --> 00:06:57.004 What are you talking about? 81 00:06:57.450 --> 00:07:02.153 I called to get on the air with Talk Time at WKIX AM. 82 00:07:02.503 --> 00:07:05.940 I have an important issue to discuss with Brenda Dobbs. 83 00:07:06.331 --> 00:07:10.815 I'm afraid Doctor Brenda isn't available right now, but if you have a moment... 84 00:07:10.917 --> 00:07:15.846 We can discuss the terms of your collection accounts. How does that sound to you sir? 85 00:07:16.487 --> 00:07:19.088 Frankly, it sounds like shit. 86 00:07:19.432 --> 00:07:22.034 I only called to speak with Brenda Dobbs... 87 00:07:22.354 --> 00:07:25.518 And I'm not interested in any bullshit you have to offer. 88 00:07:25.713 --> 00:07:26.721 Do you hear me? 89 00:07:27.026 --> 00:07:30.713 I don't take kindly to these kinds of calls! 90 00:07:30.924 --> 00:07:33.385 I will remind you sir that you called me... 91 00:07:33.533 --> 00:07:35.783 This kind of language isn't necessary. 92 00:07:35.821 --> 00:07:38.908 In fact, it's against our protocols and I'm going to have to... 93 00:07:38.933 --> 00:07:40.815 Report you to my supervisor. 94 00:07:40.917 --> 00:07:43.948 I should warn you that the Federated Collection Agency doesn't... 95 00:07:43.987 --> 00:07:46.690 Take kindly to this kind of behavior. 96 00:07:46.745 --> 00:07:51.729 In the meantime, it's Doctor Brenda and I wish you a good day, sir. 97 00:08:00.212 --> 00:08:03.993 (Background Commercial) The Pizza Dude, he's got the biggest slice on the block! 98 00:08:04.846 --> 00:08:08.299 Welcome back, this is Talk Time on WKIX AM... 99 00:08:08.354 --> 00:08:11.650 That's Kicks AM, brought to you by The Pizza Dude. 100 00:08:11.745 --> 00:08:13.956 He's got the biggest slice on the block... 101 00:08:14.002 --> 00:08:17.165 And I'm Doctor Brenda Dobbs, host of the number one psychiatry show 102 00:08:17.210 --> 00:08:20.486 In the entire tri-state area, for 10 years running. 103 00:08:20.971 --> 00:08:24.197 I'm proud to say that we've helped thousands of people here on Talk Time... 104 00:08:24.245 --> 00:08:26.768 And every single one of them is special... 105 00:08:27.049 --> 00:08:30.698 I shouldn't have to tell you this, but you're all special. 106 00:08:31.025 --> 00:08:33.588 Now let's go back to the phones with another listener that... 107 00:08:33.635 --> 00:08:36.729 Needs some help this holiday season. Hello, this is Doctor Brenda... 108 00:08:37.135 --> 00:08:39.846 I care and I'm always listening. How can I help? 109 00:08:40.307 --> 00:08:43.104 First, let me thank you very much for having me on the air. 110 00:08:43.129 --> 00:08:46.784 I'm a huge fan of yours and listening to you has been such a big help. 111 00:08:47.128 --> 00:08:51.338 Especially this time of year when my job is even more stressful than usual. 112 00:08:51.846 --> 00:08:55.206 I appreciate that. I'm always listening and I'm here to help. 113 00:08:55.245 --> 00:08:57.971 Now, if you don't mind me asking, what do you do? 114 00:08:58.049 --> 00:09:01.307 That's actually what I called about, I'm in collections... 115 00:09:01.354 --> 00:09:03.479 As you can imagine, it's never easy, but... 116 00:09:03.526 --> 00:09:05.948 Around Christmas it's even worse. 117 00:09:06.018 --> 00:09:09.292 I just had a person curse at me for no good reason at all. 118 00:09:09.409 --> 00:09:11.525 I didn't even get to the part where I tell him... 119 00:09:11.550 --> 00:09:13.534 How much he owed or what his options were. 120 00:09:13.721 --> 00:09:16.042 And already with the foul language! 121 00:09:16.143 --> 00:09:19.260 Like I'm a bad person because he can't pay his bills. 122 00:09:20.382 --> 00:09:23.170 I want to thank you for opening up about this kind of behavior. 123 00:09:23.226 --> 00:09:26.905 I don't mean to minimize or depersonalize your situation... 124 00:09:27.562 --> 00:09:32.132 But I need all of our listeners to consider this a teachable moment. 125 00:09:32.327 --> 00:09:35.515 It's always painful when someone tries to cut you down. 126 00:09:35.760 --> 00:09:40.292 But it shouldn't be a surprise. People can be very nasty. 127 00:09:40.682 --> 00:09:44.182 Normally, it's a reflection of their own deficiencies, but whatever the case... 128 00:09:44.207 --> 00:09:46.956 You can't let it get you on the inside. 129 00:09:47.191 --> 00:09:50.574 I can't stress this enough, but the actions of others... 130 00:09:50.924 --> 00:09:54.190 Shouldn't prevent you from realizing your full potential. 131 00:09:54.260 --> 00:09:56.479 In the 70's, they called it actualizing. 132 00:10:04.558 --> 00:10:08.605 (Off screen advertisement) Anxiety? Depression? Paranormal Experiences? 133 00:10:08.714 --> 00:10:12.244 Tune into Talk Time with Doctor Brenda Dobbs, solving problems one listener... 134 00:10:12.276 --> 00:10:14.448 Doorbell rings! And rings again! 135 00:11:10.463 --> 00:11:13.220 The loud, heavy metal Christmas music starts again... 136 00:11:20.212 --> 00:11:21.501 Huh? Must be the best man... 137 00:11:29.158 --> 00:11:30.885 (Off screen) Would you turn that down? 138 00:11:31.370 --> 00:11:34.088 (Off screen) Please turn that down. Turn it down. 139 00:11:37.503 --> 00:11:38.838 (Off screen) Turn the music down! 140 00:11:40.026 --> 00:11:42.463 Turn that down! 141 00:11:42.488 --> 00:11:46.260 Would you turn the damn music down? 142 00:11:47.229 --> 00:11:48.917 Thank you... 143 00:12:26.343 --> 00:12:31.976 Water dripping sounds in the background... 144 00:12:45.093 --> 00:12:49.444 Water dripping continues... 145 00:13:01.170 --> 00:13:06.584 Water dripping continues... 146 00:13:47.896 --> 00:13:51.544 Water dripping from another faucet followed by creepy music... 147 00:14:09.205 --> 00:14:12.104 Water dripping from the other faucet... 148 00:14:22.984 --> 00:14:29.766 And from the other faucet again... 149 00:14:30.081 --> 00:14:35.237 Both faucets at once now... 150 00:15:25.463 --> 00:15:29.557 Now from another room in the house... 151 00:15:41.028 --> 00:15:44.794 The dripping continues... 152 00:16:24.332 --> 00:16:27.613 And yet another faucet... 153 00:16:42.987 --> 00:16:47.597 Now it's running water from off screen... 154 00:19:11.247 --> 00:19:13.770 It was the strangest thing... 155 00:19:14.270 --> 00:19:16.223 I'm too tired for this. 156 00:19:16.309 --> 00:19:20.216 I'd be in much better shape if it wasn't for your fidgeting last night. 157 00:19:20.370 --> 00:19:24.776 Constant fidgeting. I could hardly get any sleep. 158 00:19:25.010 --> 00:19:27.182 Huh? Fidgeting? 159 00:19:27.682 --> 00:19:30.378 You didn't hear anything out of the ordinary last night? 160 00:19:31.049 --> 00:19:34.487 Yes, I heard you fidgeting like crazy. 161 00:19:34.917 --> 00:19:40.338 And I'm not finished lecturing you. You should learn proper manners. 162 00:19:42.588 --> 00:19:43.885 Sorry babe. 163 00:19:44.532 --> 00:19:47.219 It's just that there must be something wrong with the plumbing then. 164 00:19:48.420 --> 00:19:51.920 I was up in the middle of the night and everything was... 165 00:19:53.397 --> 00:19:54.498 Dripping... 166 00:19:55.647 --> 00:19:56.826 Dripping... 167 00:19:57.694 --> 00:19:58.694 Dripping... 168 00:19:59.444 --> 00:20:01.061 We should call a plumber. 169 00:20:01.473 --> 00:20:04.979 Oh, and who's going to pay for this plumber with you out of work? 170 00:20:05.379 --> 00:20:08.895 Nothing fancy, just an ordinary plumber. 171 00:20:09.178 --> 00:20:13.211 The first thing you should do is get an ordinary job. 172 00:20:15.270 --> 00:20:19.128 Have you even had an interview yet? 173 00:20:19.440 --> 00:20:24.147 No, nothing yet, but there was this letter that was very promising. 174 00:20:25.143 --> 00:20:28.258 Well, as my father used to say... 175 00:20:28.375 --> 00:20:32.350 The best way to keep the collection people from dropping off letters... 176 00:20:32.375 --> 00:20:34.518 In the middle of the night is to work for a living. 177 00:20:36.774 --> 00:20:39.186 At least the honeymoon pictures should be here soon. 178 00:20:39.215 --> 00:20:41.159 Oh, and how about my tree? 179 00:20:41.305 --> 00:20:43.356 What am I supposed to say to all the neighbors? 180 00:20:43.381 --> 00:20:45.815 It's starting to get embarrassing. 181 00:20:46.778 --> 00:20:49.740 Everyone knows your out of work. It's written all over your face. 182 00:20:50.284 --> 00:20:52.599 I married a provider. 183 00:20:52.892 --> 00:20:55.743 It's just that if these pictures are any good... 184 00:20:55.782 --> 00:20:59.132 I've got a good mind to start working on my masterpiece again. 185 00:20:59.640 --> 00:21:00.656 Think about it... 186 00:21:00.909 --> 00:21:05.118 They gave Bob Dylan the Nobel Prize for playing electric guitar! 187 00:21:05.817 --> 00:21:07.955 These people don't know dick! 188 00:21:07.980 --> 00:21:11.823 Watch your language! I'll not sit here and take this abuse. 189 00:21:12.311 --> 00:21:15.573 Order whatever ordinary plumber and old fashioned photos you want... 190 00:21:15.728 --> 00:21:20.309 But you'll do none of it with my blessing until you get a job, that's for sure. 191 00:21:20.612 --> 00:21:25.378 And don't keep me awake all night again with your constant fidgeting! 192 00:21:25.836 --> 00:21:29.440 Huh? What constitutes a fidget? 193 00:22:36.378 --> 00:22:38.927 A camera lens clicks off screen... 194 00:23:26.597 --> 00:23:27.877 The camera clicks again... 195 00:23:28.599 --> 00:23:30.572 Her cellphone rings... 196 00:23:37.271 --> 00:23:39.615 I thought I told you never to call me when I'm here. 197 00:23:42.665 --> 00:23:46.161 I don't want to hear another fucking word about your collection agency, OK? 198 00:24:04.262 --> 00:24:06.919 Thunder rumbles in the background... 199 00:25:16.111 --> 00:25:19.909 Sarge, why do I always get the crappy ones? 200 00:25:20.193 --> 00:25:23.532 (Off screen) I'd rather be at the nudie bar myself Hamilton, but it is what it is. 201 00:25:23.747 --> 00:25:24.753 What do we got there? 202 00:25:25.075 --> 00:25:28.512 The odds are 10 to 1 it's a jealous boyfriend. 203 00:25:29.460 --> 00:25:32.086 He calls her. She rebuffs him. 204 00:25:32.282 --> 00:25:34.294 And then he strangles her in broad daylight. 205 00:25:34.381 --> 00:25:38.385 Exactly! Why do I always get the crappy ones? 206 00:26:06.890 --> 00:26:09.321 It says here her name was Brenda Dobbs. 207 00:26:09.409 --> 00:26:10.610 The radio shrink? 208 00:26:11.245 --> 00:26:14.643 Of course not, my wife was just listening to her this morning... 209 00:26:14.888 --> 00:26:17.788 She's an addict. Has to listen everyday. 210 00:26:18.108 --> 00:26:24.085 Something about actualizing herself or some new age shit... 211 00:26:24.456 --> 00:26:29.769 From that stupid show, with all the split screens and other gimmicks. 212 00:26:30.130 --> 00:26:31.497 Never heard of it. 213 00:26:40.616 --> 00:26:42.863 Sarge, what do you make of this? 214 00:26:43.546 --> 00:26:46.183 It says this is from the Federated Collection Agency. 215 00:26:46.818 --> 00:26:47.902 Holy shit! 216 00:26:48.917 --> 00:26:52.267 I changed my mind. This could be a good one after all. 217 00:26:58.456 --> 00:27:00.986 I think we're dealing with a real sick bastard. 218 00:27:02.451 --> 00:27:05.868 Of course, losing your job is one of the things that can make the holidays... 219 00:27:05.898 --> 00:27:09.023 Even more stressful. It can also be embarrassing. 220 00:27:09.316 --> 00:27:13.602 But we're all friends here. This is Doctor Brenda. The number one psychiatrist... 221 00:27:13.627 --> 00:27:15.504 In the world, fuck Doctor Phil! 222 00:27:15.926 --> 00:27:18.670 I really care, and I'm always listening. 223 00:27:18.944 --> 00:27:22.499 I know there are people out there that lost their jobs and need our help. 224 00:27:22.547 --> 00:27:26.571 It seems like the Federated Collection Agency and these other big companies... 225 00:27:26.854 --> 00:27:30.086 Always wait until right before Christmas to lay people off... 226 00:27:30.126 --> 00:27:33.456 Like they want to send you straight into the holidays worried about... 227 00:27:33.631 --> 00:27:35.223 Money and your future. 228 00:27:35.838 --> 00:27:38.895 If you're one of those unfortunate souls, and you need to talk... 229 00:27:39.104 --> 00:27:42.697 The lines are open at 1-800-987-WKIX. 230 00:27:42.883 --> 00:27:46.330 That's 1-800-987-9549. 231 00:27:46.355 --> 00:27:48.916 This is Doctor Brenda on Talk Time... 232 00:27:48.946 --> 00:27:52.412 Brought to you by the Pizza Dude, he's got the biggest slice on the block... 233 00:27:52.441 --> 00:27:57.698 And we're broadcasting to you live from WKIX AM, that's Kicks AM. 234 00:27:57.722 --> 00:28:00.769 We're gonna take a quick break and then go back to the phones. 235 00:28:00.807 --> 00:28:08.639 Strange electrical noises in the background... 236 00:28:09.180 --> 00:28:13.125 This is Doctor Brenda on WKIX AM, that's Kicks AM... 237 00:28:13.169 --> 00:28:16.283 And your listening to Talk Time brought to you by the Pizza Dude... 238 00:28:16.333 --> 00:28:18.061 He's got the biggest slice on the block. 239 00:28:18.413 --> 00:28:20.503 I care and I'm always listening. 240 00:28:20.538 --> 00:28:22.656 We're back from the commercial break on the phone... 241 00:28:22.686 --> 00:28:24.756 With a gentleman that we spoke to just last week. 242 00:28:24.961 --> 00:28:27.881 Unfortunately, things have taken a turn for the worse. 243 00:28:27.920 --> 00:28:29.620 Please tell us what happened. 244 00:28:29.944 --> 00:28:32.063 Thank you, Doctor Brenda. 245 00:28:32.362 --> 00:28:35.233 I called again because I lost my job yesterday. 246 00:28:35.409 --> 00:28:38.407 Apparently, I had too many complaints to my supervisor. 247 00:28:38.690 --> 00:28:41.805 Can you remind the audience what you do for a living again? 248 00:28:41.861 --> 00:28:43.268 Sure thing, Doctor B. 249 00:28:43.336 --> 00:28:46.530 I mentioned this last week because of the stress this time of year. 250 00:28:46.657 --> 00:28:50.436 I am, or I guess I was, a collections agent. 251 00:28:50.641 --> 00:28:55.150 I lost my job because people complain that they didn't pay their own bills. 252 00:28:55.278 --> 00:28:57.231 The world has really gone to shit! 253 00:28:57.465 --> 00:28:59.858 Did they tell you what the complaints were about? 254 00:29:00.229 --> 00:29:02.016 Money, it's always about money. 255 00:29:02.280 --> 00:29:05.981 I don't mean to sound nasty, but the people I was collecting from weren't exactly... 256 00:29:06.034 --> 00:29:09.579 President Trump. I'm sorry, is that OK to say on the air? 257 00:29:09.735 --> 00:29:10.858 President Trump? 258 00:29:10.885 --> 00:29:14.117 Yeah, I heard he threatened to sue some people for just talking about him... 259 00:29:14.147 --> 00:29:17.379 Without his permission, and I can't afford a lawsuit right now. 260 00:29:17.969 --> 00:29:20.791 It's fine, he's a long time listener. Please continue. 261 00:29:21.026 --> 00:29:24.580 Anyway, like I told you last week. When the man cursed at me... 262 00:29:24.639 --> 00:29:26.153 I didn't do anything wrong. 263 00:29:26.328 --> 00:29:31.524 I didn't even get to tell him how much he owed, but my supervisor acted like... 264 00:29:34.239 --> 00:29:36.133 Doorbell rings multiple times... 265 00:29:40.626 --> 00:29:42.394 Doorbell keeps ringing... 266 00:29:47.003 --> 00:29:48.458 That took long enough! 267 00:29:48.976 --> 00:29:50.851 Anyway, listen... 268 00:29:52.149 --> 00:29:55.020 I'm hear about some dripping. A leaky faucet. 269 00:29:55.381 --> 00:29:56.406 What? 270 00:29:57.081 --> 00:30:01.172 It says here The Federated Collection Agency, see? 271 00:30:01.534 --> 00:30:04.932 Something about out of control dripping in the middle of the night. 272 00:30:05.406 --> 00:30:06.432 Dripping? 273 00:30:06.501 --> 00:30:11.383 Yes, it says here, quote, it was the strangest thing... 274 00:30:11.736 --> 00:30:14.949 Ah, that must've been my wife. 275 00:30:16.083 --> 00:30:17.616 That's very nice dear. 276 00:30:17.684 --> 00:30:18.705 Hmm? 277 00:30:18.749 --> 00:30:23.534 I said congratulations, but I gotta come in and check this dripping... 278 00:30:23.603 --> 00:30:25.487 Do you need me to check your plumbing? 279 00:30:57.195 --> 00:30:59.070 It was the strangest thing. 280 00:30:59.993 --> 00:31:03.079 All of the faucets starting dripping in the middle of the night. 281 00:31:04.007 --> 00:31:06.097 Even the toilets were going crazy. 282 00:31:06.858 --> 00:31:10.276 I tried to stop them, but I couldn't shut it off. 283 00:31:11.858 --> 00:31:13.509 They wouldn't stop. 284 00:31:14.264 --> 00:31:17.194 Then there was this letter from the Federated Collection Agency. 285 00:31:18.600 --> 00:31:22.116 Something about some kind of job opportunity. 286 00:31:22.917 --> 00:31:24.928 It's fucking dirty down here. 287 00:31:31.671 --> 00:31:37.237 Since I am in transition and need a new job... 288 00:31:42.540 --> 00:31:45.186 They got me having this wrench, all the God damned time... 289 00:31:45.216 --> 00:31:47.475 It's like they want me to play... Ooh, sorry about that. 290 00:31:47.504 --> 00:31:49.311 They want me to play ready golf, bro. 291 00:31:49.926 --> 00:31:52.456 I mean, you're here, it's like it hurts my back. 292 00:31:53.022 --> 00:31:55.336 Still, the problem could be upstairs. 293 00:31:55.791 --> 00:31:58.750 And I'm not really ready to certify your plumbing yet. 294 00:31:59.376 --> 00:32:03.467 I don't know, I think this looks nice, but you got pipes upstairs, right? 295 00:32:03.669 --> 00:32:06.540 With all the, on account of all these problems, I think we go upstairs. 296 00:32:15.522 --> 00:32:18.412 Why such a tight hat, bro, you know what it does? 297 00:32:19.809 --> 00:32:22.426 It takes me a while to do my hair. 298 00:32:23.168 --> 00:32:27.260 So even the hair weighs me down, the hair gets me to 290 some days bro... 299 00:32:28.227 --> 00:32:32.055 Oh, do you play? Check it out, that's nice. 300 00:32:32.258 --> 00:32:35.950 Haha! That's why you got ready golf, you’re like put, put, pass! 301 00:32:38.366 --> 00:32:41.275 Holy moly, that's some fucking processor! 302 00:32:41.573 --> 00:32:45.196 I don't think that's any of your business. 303 00:32:45.616 --> 00:32:48.057 And neither are my golf playing habits. 304 00:32:48.194 --> 00:32:51.031 Welcome back to Talk Time, the number one psychiatry show... 305 00:32:51.056 --> 00:32:54.616 Brought to you by the Pizza Dude, he's got the biggest slice on the block. 306 00:32:54.860 --> 00:32:59.135 This is Doctor Brenda Dobbs, broadcasting from WKIX AM... 307 00:32:59.184 --> 00:33:02.378 That's Kicks AM, and before we got back to the phones... 308 00:33:02.456 --> 00:33:04.984 I wanted to take a brief moment to talk to you about some... 309 00:33:05.024 --> 00:33:09.301 Some very corrosive, dangerous, despicable, deplorable people. 310 00:33:09.807 --> 00:33:12.209 You know who you are, irredeemables... 311 00:33:12.234 --> 00:33:14.543 The kind of people that get this last caller fired. 312 00:33:14.573 --> 00:33:18.372 The kind of people that strangle a girl with a garrote for no reason. 313 00:33:20.061 --> 00:33:25.272 In fact, I'm quite certain that none of this is any of your business. 314 00:33:25.653 --> 00:33:29.764 Geez, I was just trying to make polite conversation, but now that you mention it. 315 00:33:30.047 --> 00:33:31.561 Maybe I should be on my way. 316 00:33:31.610 --> 00:33:33.983 I'll remind you, however, that you called me... 317 00:33:34.315 --> 00:33:37.010 And we still have no idea what's wrong with your pipes. 318 00:33:37.847 --> 00:33:44.282 But why don't you just pay your bill and I'll be happy to leave your business, OK? 319 00:33:45.748 --> 00:33:48.238 I'd like nothing further... 320 00:33:49.566 --> 00:33:51.480 Now if you'll just let me grab my wallet here... 321 00:34:27.043 --> 00:34:28.996 We're gonna get back to the phones in a moment... 322 00:34:29.045 --> 00:34:32.375 The lines are open at 1-800-987-WKIX... 323 00:34:32.400 --> 00:34:35.660 That's 1-800-987-9549. 324 00:34:35.944 --> 00:34:39.733 Brought to you today, as always, by the Pizza Dude, say it with me now... 325 00:34:39.870 --> 00:34:41.852 He's got the biggest slice on the block! 326 00:34:41.987 --> 00:34:45.934 This is Doctor Brenda Dobbs, I care and I'm always listening... 327 00:34:45.959 --> 00:34:49.954 Whether you're a plumber or a golfer or anything in between... 328 00:34:50.295 --> 00:34:51.536 We're here to help. 329 00:34:52.189 --> 00:34:55.578 Thank you for calling in, sir, we've got another long time listener... 330 00:34:55.618 --> 00:34:58.557 First time caller on the phone, can you tell us your name please? 331 00:34:59.831 --> 00:35:00.964 Brenda? 332 00:35:01.140 --> 00:35:02.947 Is this Brenda Dobbs? 333 00:35:02.986 --> 00:35:06.101 This is Doctor Brenda Dobbs. Who do we have on the line? 334 00:35:06.911 --> 00:35:09.812 Oh. My. God. 335 00:35:10.349 --> 00:35:14.782 I can't believe I finally got through. I've been trying for years. 336 00:35:15.292 --> 00:35:19.188 But those bastards from that Federated Whatever You Call It Agency... 337 00:35:19.295 --> 00:35:21.326 Breathes heavily and loudly! 338 00:35:21.569 --> 00:35:22.838 Shhhhhhh! 339 00:35:24.040 --> 00:35:27.960 Can't you see I'm talking to Brenda Dobbs over here? 340 00:35:27.984 --> 00:35:30.082 Please, sir, it's Doctor Dobbs. 341 00:35:30.107 --> 00:35:33.363 It sounds like you have a lot going on in the background, over there. 342 00:35:33.452 --> 00:35:36.333 Try to focus on my voice and tell us your name. 343 00:35:36.645 --> 00:35:40.366 I know this stuff can be very difficult for a first time caller, but remember... 344 00:35:40.561 --> 00:35:43.452 I care and I'm always listening... 345 00:35:46.282 --> 00:35:50.247 This is very, very important. 346 00:35:50.422 --> 00:35:53.352 Excuse me, sir, are you still there? 347 00:35:55.813 --> 00:35:57.493 Please answer me if you can. 348 00:35:57.542 --> 00:36:01.076 I said earlier that everyone could use a little help this time of year, but... 349 00:36:01.101 --> 00:36:03.704 It sounds like you might need a little more than most. 350 00:36:04.524 --> 00:36:07.708 This is very, very embarrassing, Brenda... 351 00:36:08.049 --> 00:36:09.534 Something just came up. 352 00:36:10.038 --> 00:36:13.935 But I promise, you haven't heard the last of me. 353 00:36:14.131 --> 00:36:18.057 Trust me, I'm your biggest fan. 354 00:36:19.151 --> 00:36:21.602 Thank you, but that's Doctor... (dial tone noise...) 355 00:36:25.503 --> 00:36:28.325 I knew it from the second I opened the door, Brandon... 356 00:36:28.501 --> 00:36:30.727 You just couldn't be an ordinary plumber. 357 00:36:32.030 --> 00:36:35.204 My wife doesn't know any ordinary plumbers. 358 00:36:35.878 --> 00:36:39.355 And you're not getting anywhere near my wife! 359 00:36:39.960 --> 00:36:43.358 The think Francis Ford Whatever The Fuck can make a movie? 360 00:36:43.622 --> 00:36:45.243 Wait 'til they get a load of me! 361 00:38:33.858 --> 00:38:36.885 (Off screen) What the fuck? (Sounds of falling and crashing) 362 00:38:52.142 --> 00:38:53.871 What the fuck is wrong with you, mister? 363 00:38:54.193 --> 00:38:56.996 All I said was I was gonna fill your wife's fucking rim holes! 364 00:39:40.798 --> 00:39:45.475 Moaning and sexual sounds, building... (The Wife and the Plumber) 365 00:39:45.735 --> 00:39:49.592 Moaning continues and builds... 366 00:39:50.842 --> 00:39:58.030 Oh, Brandon, Brandon, fill my rim hole! I'm about to certify those pipes. 367 00:40:13.928 --> 00:40:17.092 Aah, shit, whining and screaming in pain... 368 00:40:42.045 --> 00:40:45.024 Why do you insist in lying to me about this plumber? 369 00:40:47.826 --> 00:40:54.233 Why would I lie about something, someone, so stupid? 370 00:40:56.069 --> 00:41:01.371 Actually claiming that an ordinary plumber showed up here out of the blue... 371 00:41:01.717 --> 00:41:03.949 Some, Brendan, or something? 372 00:41:04.775 --> 00:41:08.636 Yes, he had some funny name, like Brenda Dobbs. 373 00:41:08.960 --> 00:41:11.460 And he had a report with him as well. 374 00:41:11.998 --> 00:41:14.286 Said it was the strangest thing. 375 00:41:14.398 --> 00:41:16.206 Don't be ridiculous. 376 00:41:16.473 --> 00:41:19.353 Ordinary plumbers don't talk like that. 377 00:41:19.576 --> 00:41:22.891 And they don't show up with mysterious dossiers... 378 00:41:23.750 --> 00:41:26.239 There's something your not telling me. 379 00:41:29.839 --> 00:41:31.424 Have you been cheating on me? 380 00:41:32.496 --> 00:41:33.533 What? 381 00:41:35.297 --> 00:41:36.759 Is there someone else? 382 00:41:38.757 --> 00:41:42.562 What kind of sick mind could produce such a thought? 383 00:41:43.344 --> 00:41:47.551 My mother warned me about marrying a failure in life. 384 00:41:48.528 --> 00:41:53.127 A job and a Johnson, two things a man needs, she said. 385 00:41:54.098 --> 00:41:55.616 And I married you... 386 00:41:59.009 --> 00:42:01.542 I knew it, it's the plumber! 387 00:42:01.821 --> 00:42:06.051 It was no ordinary plumber that certified our pipes, you lying bitch... 388 00:42:13.168 --> 00:42:17.990 You do have a Johnson, now go out and find a damn job. 389 00:42:18.938 --> 00:42:22.030 It's tough out there, you gotta have patience. 390 00:42:22.744 --> 00:42:24.340 Patient and time are the key. 391 00:42:25.010 --> 00:42:28.168 With a little luck, I'll hear back from that Federated... 392 00:42:28.224 --> 00:42:29.786 Whatever You Call It Agency soon. 393 00:42:30.782 --> 00:42:32.924 Oh, that's nice dear. 394 00:42:33.594 --> 00:42:36.206 Did you have any better luck with the Christmas Tree? 395 00:42:38.348 --> 00:42:41.529 Oh look, another thing you failed me at. 396 00:45:49.095 --> 00:45:52.365 Sarge, this seems to be the address... 397 00:45:53.615 --> 00:45:54.865 Did you know the door was open? 398 00:45:55.781 --> 00:45:57.198 Well how far open is it? 399 00:45:59.238 --> 00:46:02.520 Sarge, I didn't exactly bring a ruler. Should I have brought a ruler? 400 00:46:03.317 --> 00:46:04.701 Maybe you should have. 401 00:46:04.913 --> 00:46:08.931 With all these new agency regulations it's a shit show around here. 402 00:46:09.311 --> 00:46:12.647 They keep jamming me up, so I honestly don't know. 403 00:46:13.670 --> 00:46:16.807 All I know is that something's starting to stink around here. 404 00:46:17.972 --> 00:46:19.847 First, Brenda Dobbs is dead. 405 00:46:20.941 --> 00:46:22.950 Now, an open door with a missing plumber. 406 00:46:25.684 --> 00:46:28.184 An ordinary plumber who all of sudden disappears? 407 00:46:29.055 --> 00:46:30.472 That is unusual... 408 00:46:31.934 --> 00:46:34.055 Sarge, something is definitely stinking up a storm! 409 00:46:36.309 --> 00:46:37.760 Consider this a request for back up. 410 00:46:38.871 --> 00:46:39.986 I'm going in. 411 00:46:41.003 --> 00:46:42.453 Watch yourself, Hamilton. 412 00:48:00.966 --> 00:48:05.129 I'm sorry to interrupt, but I heard you mention something earlier... 413 00:48:05.286 --> 00:48:07.608 About Brenda Dobbs being dead. 414 00:48:08.099 --> 00:48:11.491 Such a shame, I was her biggest fan. 415 00:48:12.139 --> 00:48:15.866 Until she sold out to the Federated Whatever You Call It Agency... 416 00:48:16.179 --> 00:48:17.663 Can you believe it? 417 00:48:18.547 --> 00:48:22.833 I know what you mean, I can't stand that Doctor Dobbs either... 418 00:48:23.949 --> 00:48:26.404 Gave my wife the worst advice ever once... 419 00:48:26.817 --> 00:48:30.947 But unfortunately she's not dead yet and that's not why I'm here. 420 00:48:31.215 --> 00:48:33.424 May I ask why you're here? 421 00:48:34.049 --> 00:48:36.236 I'm sorry I didn't come to the door earlier... 422 00:48:36.303 --> 00:48:39.607 But I'm preparing for a very important job interview right now. 423 00:48:39.997 --> 00:48:41.638 My time is very limited... 424 00:48:41.673 --> 00:48:43.534 Keep your hands where I can see them, buddy! 425 00:48:45.924 --> 00:48:47.888 There's a pool of blood here... 426 00:48:48.056 --> 00:48:50.165 Like someone got smashed in the head with a wrench. 427 00:48:51.081 --> 00:48:52.264 Care to explain yourself? 428 00:48:53.457 --> 00:48:56.024 I'm not sure if I'm at liberty to discuss it openly. 429 00:48:56.515 --> 00:49:02.062 But if you must know, I'm interviewing with the Federated Collection Agency. 430 00:49:02.664 --> 00:49:06.582 Look, pal, I don't have any truck for the Agency... 431 00:49:07.006 --> 00:49:10.644 Or as I mentioned, that Doctor Dobbs herself. 432 00:49:13.920 --> 00:49:15.740 I'm here about a plumber. 433 00:49:20.793 --> 00:49:23.036 What would I know about a missing plumber? 434 00:49:24.097 --> 00:49:25.570 Who said the plumber is missing? 435 00:49:26.920 --> 00:49:27.958 You did. 436 00:49:28.538 --> 00:49:29.554 I did? 437 00:49:30.056 --> 00:49:31.965 Yeah, I think you told me at the door. 438 00:49:33.349 --> 00:49:34.443 Exactly! 439 00:49:34.898 --> 00:49:37.666 Except I don't know any ordinary plumbers. 440 00:49:38.134 --> 00:49:41.705 You would have to speak to my wife. She handles all of these matters. 441 00:49:42.485 --> 00:49:44.081 Is your wife at home sir? 442 00:49:45.701 --> 00:49:49.060 If you must insist, we're newlyweds. 443 00:49:49.149 --> 00:49:52.051 And as you said, he was an ordinary plumber. 444 00:49:52.230 --> 00:49:56.482 Brenda-something-or-other, he certified our pipes and that was that. 445 00:50:03.112 --> 00:50:05.210 That's an interesting story, no doubt. 446 00:50:06.047 --> 00:50:07.878 I don't see how it explains all the blood. 447 00:50:08.726 --> 00:50:11.226 This? Oh, that's easy. 448 00:50:11.251 --> 00:50:14.504 I cut myself cooking dinner for my wife. 449 00:50:14.948 --> 00:50:17.917 I'm between jobs, and it's the least I could do. 450 00:50:18.767 --> 00:50:20.686 Seems like a lot of blood for a little cut. 451 00:50:21.791 --> 00:50:24.559 Oh, it wasn't little, I assure you... 452 00:50:24.682 --> 00:50:29.135 Look at that bandage! There was a geyser of blood. 453 00:50:29.581 --> 00:50:33.008 Fortunately, I was able to act quickly and effectively... 454 00:50:33.108 --> 00:50:36.177 I staunched the wound and then raced over the bathroom. 455 00:50:36.650 --> 00:50:42.197 Alas, I dropped the rag by the bannister and that was all she wrote. 456 00:50:46.360 --> 00:50:47.967 No need for back up, Sarge... 457 00:50:49.217 --> 00:50:50.724 Nothing unusual here... 458 00:50:52.554 --> 00:50:54.284 Just an odd cooking accident. 459 00:51:00.738 --> 00:51:03.785 Thank you again, sir. We appreciate the cooperation. 460 00:51:05.995 --> 00:51:07.546 Good luck with the interview as well. 461 00:51:08.082 --> 00:51:11.721 Thank you, detective, if there's anything I can do, don't hesitate to ask. 462 00:51:41.966 --> 00:51:44.377 What do you got in the bag, a dead body? 463 00:51:44.466 --> 00:51:46.799 Ha ha ha ha ha ha! 464 00:51:49.533 --> 00:51:51.832 Ha ha ha ha ha ha! 465 00:52:15.498 --> 00:52:17.406 See, what did I tell you, it's right here. 466 00:52:23.598 --> 00:52:27.907 I mean, I didn't check for a pulse or anything, but he looks pretty dead to me. 467 00:52:28.330 --> 00:52:30.072 That's a foot, a hand... 468 00:52:30.194 --> 00:52:31.958 Sarge, this can't be a coincidence. 469 00:52:32.610 --> 00:52:34.942 Two bodies in one week has to mean something. 470 00:52:35.411 --> 00:52:39.831 Yeah, especially with the agency involved in that whole Doctor Dobbs business. 471 00:52:39.976 --> 00:52:41.817 The pizza dude has gone missing! 472 00:52:42.369 --> 00:52:44.377 Yeah, I agree with that... 473 00:52:44.701 --> 00:52:51.051 I can't stand that Doctor Dobbs woman, and I hate to say it, but the Pizza Dude sucks. 474 00:52:51.476 --> 00:52:54.422 He's got big slices alright, but they taste like shit. 475 00:52:54.657 --> 00:52:57.592 I disagree with you on that. He made a tasty pie. 476 00:52:57.748 --> 00:53:00.237 But what about that creepy dude with the cooking accident? 477 00:53:00.380 --> 00:53:03.895 The one who said he didn't order that now- deceased ordinary plumber. 478 00:53:04.208 --> 00:53:07.690 That dude and the Agency? Didn't I tell you he was clean? 479 00:53:08.549 --> 00:53:11.194 Besides, if anything, he killed the wife. 480 00:53:11.619 --> 00:53:12.869 His wife's dead? 481 00:53:13.189 --> 00:53:16.381 How the hell do I know? I just started this investigation. 482 00:53:16.834 --> 00:53:19.613 But like I told you, he's got nothing to do with this. 483 00:53:20.540 --> 00:53:23.721 I still like Brenda's creepy boyfriend for the whole thing. 484 00:53:24.034 --> 00:53:27.706 Otherwise, it was probably something brewing at the Agency... 485 00:53:28.811 --> 00:53:30.931 Who know what's going on this time of year? 486 00:54:43.867 --> 00:54:48.384 You must get this all the time, but you look exactly like Brenda Dobbs. 487 00:54:49.692 --> 00:54:50.697 Who? 488 00:54:50.853 --> 00:54:53.420 Brenda Dobbs, the radio psychologist. 489 00:54:53.510 --> 00:54:56.903 Oh, Doctor Brenda. Yes, I have heard that before. 490 00:54:56.959 --> 00:55:00.764 Well, it should be very flattering to you. 491 00:55:01.200 --> 00:55:03.387 I was her biggest fan. 492 00:55:04.380 --> 00:55:05.819 Isn't that nice dear. 493 00:55:07.850 --> 00:55:08.877 What? 494 00:55:10.261 --> 00:55:12.795 I said we should probably get down to business. 495 00:55:15.864 --> 00:55:17.806 I'd like nothing more. 496 00:55:18.732 --> 00:55:22.694 I should begin by mentioning that I've always had the utmost respect for... 497 00:55:22.728 --> 00:55:29.268 The work you do here at the Federated Whatever You Call It Agency. 498 00:55:30.005 --> 00:55:31.958 Especially this time of year. 499 00:55:33.063 --> 00:55:37.572 Thank you. It is very rewarding, gratifying even... 500 00:55:37.607 --> 00:55:40.590 But that does bring me to some unfortunate news. 501 00:55:41.059 --> 00:55:42.086 Who? 502 00:55:42.578 --> 00:55:44.898 Well, you know that you ask. 503 00:55:44.922 --> 00:55:45.938 Me? 504 00:55:45.982 --> 00:55:47.098 Yes, you. 505 00:55:48.538 --> 00:55:53.159 It appears that a complaint has already been filed. Preemptively, as it were... 506 00:55:53.270 --> 00:55:56.619 And the employee who filed it has been terminated... 507 00:55:56.644 --> 00:56:00.434 Apparently as a result of your own complaint. 508 00:56:00.578 --> 00:56:02.320 That is highly unusual. 509 00:56:02.368 --> 00:56:03.719 But as I'm sure you can imagine... 510 00:56:03.743 --> 00:56:07.102 It's also a very big problem before you've even been hired. 511 00:56:08.654 --> 00:56:13.073 This leaves us in a bit of pickle, quite frankly. 512 00:56:13.098 --> 00:56:18.346 I've been impressed with your resume and your presentation here today. 513 00:56:18.371 --> 00:56:20.768 Your qualifications are exemplary. 514 00:56:20.915 --> 00:56:23.186 And I believe you can be a top member of the... 515 00:56:23.210 --> 00:56:25.480 Team, maybe even one of the all time greats. 516 00:56:26.507 --> 00:56:30.612 But I'm afraid my hands are completely tied for the time being. 517 00:56:30.637 --> 00:56:34.256 You see we have very strict policies... 518 00:56:34.281 --> 00:56:39.535 About our complaints department. There's a script that needs to be carefully followed. 519 00:56:39.761 --> 00:56:43.868 I apologize for not catching this before we dragged you down here today. 520 00:56:44.114 --> 00:56:50.629 And there is also the matter of some outstanding balances. 521 00:58:14.849 --> 00:58:19.749 The loud Christmas music starts again... 522 00:59:34.712 --> 00:59:36.375 Would you turn that down? 523 00:59:39.142 --> 00:59:44.555 Turn the music down! Are you trying to wake the dead again? 524 00:59:45.147 --> 00:59:48.149 I just wanted to know how your job interview went. 525 00:59:48.540 --> 00:59:51.218 I know how stressful these things can be for you. 526 00:59:51.391 --> 00:59:53.478 Did you see the Christmas tree, babe? 527 00:59:54.072 --> 00:59:59.016 Oh. My. God. I am so proud of you. 528 00:59:59.273 --> 01:00:05.534 It is after Christmas, of course, but think what a jump we'll have on next year. 529 01:00:05.858 --> 01:00:10.824 As my old friend from Denmark used to say, the readiness is all. 530 01:00:11.137 --> 01:00:13.704 That's brilliant, babe. It sounds like Shakespeare. 531 01:00:13.923 --> 01:00:15.942 Of course, he is an overrated bore. 532 01:00:16.557 --> 01:00:19.056 But it's gonna be a whole new life for us... 533 01:00:19.090 --> 01:00:22.249 Now that I'm finally getting the credit that I deserve. 534 01:00:22.907 --> 01:00:27.483 The only negative thing that happened to us today concerns our honeymoon photos. 535 01:00:29.369 --> 01:00:30.753 Here you go sir. 536 01:00:31.378 --> 01:00:33.376 Please, hold a moment. 537 01:00:33.401 --> 01:00:37.278 I need to make sure these were developed in a satisfactory manner. 538 01:00:37.303 --> 01:00:40.821 I made a number of specific requests when I placed the order. 539 01:00:41.119 --> 01:00:44.600 It's not every day that you receive your honeymoon photos. 540 01:00:44.938 --> 01:00:48.007 Oh, it doesn't say anything about that here, but sure. 541 01:00:55.078 --> 01:00:56.383 Not great. 542 01:00:56.707 --> 01:00:57.789 This isn't right. 543 01:00:58.984 --> 01:01:01.796 These are not great. 544 01:01:03.035 --> 01:01:06.852 I should've known that you would fuck this up! 545 01:01:07.410 --> 01:01:09.229 Where the hell is my wife? 546 01:01:09.263 --> 01:01:10.289 Who? 547 01:01:10.314 --> 01:01:13.432 My wife! She isn't in any of these. 548 01:01:13.581 --> 01:01:18.202 Like some amateur developer fucked up my photos! 549 01:01:18.403 --> 01:01:21.830 I'm not sure what you mean, sir. I'm just following the script here. 550 01:01:21.864 --> 01:01:23.661 They give me the package, I deliver it. 551 01:01:23.782 --> 01:01:25.288 They give me photos, and... 552 01:01:25.313 --> 01:01:27.536 I'm sorry that these aren't yours. It says here... 553 01:01:27.561 --> 01:01:31.132 It couldn't have been me, because I'm a good enough photographer for... 554 01:01:31.157 --> 01:01:34.795 For Annie Liebovitz to kiss my ass! 555 01:01:34.820 --> 01:01:37.412 I'm not sure what you mean sir. I just follow the script. 556 01:01:37.437 --> 01:01:39.690 They give me the package. I deliver it. 557 01:01:39.715 --> 01:01:44.122 You have a problem, you have to contact our complaints department. 558 01:01:44.158 --> 01:01:46.845 What if I've already used my lifetime allotment? 559 01:01:47.001 --> 01:01:48.028 Shit! 560 01:01:48.053 --> 01:01:49.923 Pardon my language sir. 561 01:01:49.948 --> 01:01:51.857 I never had that happen before. 562 01:01:51.882 --> 01:01:54.702 You caught me off my script twice in one conversation! 563 01:01:54.727 --> 01:01:58.782 This clipboard says that we can't have people complaining constantly... 564 01:01:59.034 --> 01:02:01.468 But it doesn't tell me what to do next. 565 01:02:01.493 --> 01:02:04.157 This is pretty freaking embarrassing, I gotta say. 566 01:02:04.395 --> 01:02:07.130 Hold on, sir. This might be the situation. 567 01:02:07.197 --> 01:02:10.846 In the event that it's not clearly itemized, inform the customer... 568 01:02:11.047 --> 01:02:14.083 The Federated Collection Agency takes these matters very seriously. 569 01:02:14.306 --> 01:02:17.587 I promise, we'll do the right thing for you sir. I don't understand what happened. 570 01:02:17.665 --> 01:02:22.018 Oh well, then why don't you come inside and we can call customer service together? 571 01:02:22.453 --> 01:02:27.453 I have a few things I'd like to tell them about this script business anyway. 572 01:02:27.478 --> 01:02:28.672 Right this way... 573 01:02:34.304 --> 01:02:40.118 Please, wait here. Make yourself at home. I'm sure it will only take a moment. 574 01:02:43.014 --> 01:02:45.950 Wow, that's a big knife! What do you cut with that thing? 575 01:02:51.795 --> 01:02:53.033 What the fuck are you doing? 576 01:03:40.734 --> 01:03:43.981 Even though I haven't officially started yet, I rewrote their whole... 577 01:03:44.015 --> 01:03:48.044 Customer service script. Their approval rating is probably gonna go through the roof. 578 01:03:48.401 --> 01:03:50.354 Isn't that nice dear? 579 01:03:50.379 --> 01:03:52.479 Our pipes are still certified... 580 01:03:52.504 --> 01:03:56.986 Our pictures, fucked up as they may be, are finally developed... 581 01:03:57.158 --> 01:04:02.581 And our future is fully secure thanks to the Federated Whatever You Call It Agency. 582 01:08:57.471 --> 01:08:59.681 What are doing just laying there, dear? 583 01:09:00.722 --> 01:09:02.642 I'm not entirely sure, babe. 584 01:09:03.212 --> 01:09:07.073 But I believe it has something to do with Brenda Dobbs. 585 01:09:07.498 --> 01:09:08.714 Doctor Brenda? 586 01:09:09.082 --> 01:09:14.317 Though this new one with the shiny shoes seems to like me well enough. 587 01:09:16.571 --> 01:09:17.855 Fuck her. 588 01:09:18.692 --> 01:09:21.638 You know, you're right, babe. 589 01:09:22.152 --> 01:09:24.328 This is our house. 590 01:09:24.765 --> 01:09:27.689 The house is doing it for us. 591 01:09:28.571 --> 01:09:32.053 You can hide in there all you like Brenda. 592 01:09:32.276 --> 01:09:34.151 You have to come out sometime. 593 01:09:34.731 --> 01:09:37.767 And the dead make no sound. 594 01:09:38.024 --> 01:09:40.423 My name's not Brenda, asshole. 595 01:09:40.535 --> 01:09:44.743 And I believe she prefers Doctor Brenda Dobbs in any event. 596 01:09:45.047 --> 01:09:48.630 Whatever, you're certainly not going to get the job now. 597 01:09:48.864 --> 01:09:52.212 You're finished with the Federated Collection Agency. 598 01:09:52.982 --> 01:09:56.732 What the hell do you know? You're not even the real Brenda Dobbs. 599 01:09:57.112 --> 01:10:00.471 But maybe I've been thinking about this all wrong. 600 01:10:00.848 --> 01:10:03.471 Like George Lucas after Return of the Jedi. 601 01:10:03.773 --> 01:10:06.797 The movie whose name I dare not speak. 602 01:10:07.411 --> 01:10:08.427 Who? 603 01:10:08.650 --> 01:10:10.949 No one, a failed film maker. 604 01:10:11.273 --> 01:10:15.268 Anyway, what exactly are you planning to do with me, anyway? 605 01:10:15.346 --> 01:10:18.549 Now that you know that I'm not Brenda Dobbs. 606 01:10:18.880 --> 01:10:22.194 And what's with all these shitty pop culture references anyway? 607 01:10:22.585 --> 01:10:24.907 I thought you were a real artist. 608 01:10:59.584 --> 01:11:02.899 At the same time, I understand that seeing it unfold in front of you... 609 01:11:02.924 --> 01:11:07.083 Right there on the screen, especially when its directed at a poor man's version... 610 01:11:07.108 --> 01:11:10.551 Of your favorite radio talk show host, or at least her look alike. 611 01:11:10.576 --> 01:11:12.466 Can be traumatizing. 612 01:11:12.491 --> 01:11:17.369 That's why we're going to the phones for a deep dive into some serious group therapy. 613 01:11:17.394 --> 01:11:19.365 Right after these important messages. 614 01:11:21.395 --> 01:11:26.149 And so I am incredibly pleased, amazingly, spectacularly, wonderfully pleased... 615 01:11:26.753 --> 01:11:30.436 To present my masterpiece to you, the entire world... 616 01:11:31.635 --> 01:11:35.184 The Death of Brenda Dobbs. 617 01:11:37.907 --> 01:11:41.021 It goes without saying that I expect nothing less... 618 01:11:41.110 --> 01:11:44.938 Than beautiful, magical, exceptional reviews from all of you... 619 01:11:45.262 --> 01:11:47.539 From each and every one of you... 620 01:11:47.885 --> 01:11:50.304 For Brenda's sake let there be no... 621 01:11:50.329 --> 01:11:54.325 Kings of England here to shit on Jefferson's Declaration of Independence. 622 01:11:57.991 --> 01:12:00.959 I knew it! My genius is irresistible. 623 01:12:01.038 --> 01:12:04.375 This is on track to be the biggest global event since We Are The World. 624 01:12:04.966 --> 01:12:06.473 And, unlike... 625 01:12:18.040 --> 01:12:20.931 Who'd have thought this freak had the potential to go viral? 626 01:12:21.076 --> 01:12:23.732 He's all over the web and the phone lines are going crazy. 627 01:12:24.603 --> 01:12:27.862 And to think, those Federated Fucks thought they could yank me off the air. 628 01:14:33.694 --> 01:14:36.060 That fucking bitch! 629 01:14:45.440 --> 01:14:48.052 I just can't shake the feeling some of this could be my fault. 630 01:14:49.023 --> 01:14:50.787 I read this guy wrong from the beginning. 631 01:14:51.836 --> 01:14:53.142 Now, here we are... 632 01:14:55.195 --> 01:14:57.047 Kind of makes you think about retirement. 633 01:14:57.494 --> 01:14:59.492 A beach and a drink somewhere. 634 01:14:59.671 --> 01:15:03.778 Hold it together, Hamilton. Nobody could have predicted this freak would go viral. 635 01:15:03.856 --> 01:15:05.843 And it's hard to believe he was ever married. 636 01:15:06.070 --> 01:15:08.804 And apparently he's now at Doctor Brenda's house. 637 01:15:09.384 --> 01:15:10.556 He's at the house? 638 01:15:10.634 --> 01:15:13.893 Yeah, she's on the air complaining about where's the police when you need them... 639 01:15:13.918 --> 01:15:17.476 And whatever happened to law and order and all that other bullshit... 640 01:15:17.621 --> 01:15:19.474 Something about a faulty alarm. 641 01:15:19.708 --> 01:15:21.896 Sarge, I'm at the house. 642 01:15:22.130 --> 01:15:23.146 What house? 643 01:15:23.335 --> 01:15:25.043 Brenda Dobb's house! 644 01:15:25.449 --> 01:15:29.437 Don't do anything stupid, Hamilton. You have to wait for back up. 645 01:15:32.295 --> 01:15:33.623 I can't just sit here and wait... 646 01:15:33.679 --> 01:15:37.462 I've got to stop this sick bastard before he kills anyone else. 647 01:15:37.518 --> 01:15:41.090 God damn it Hamilton! You wait for backup and that's an order! 648 01:15:41.246 --> 01:15:42.753 Do you read me Hamilton? 649 01:15:43.768 --> 01:15:44.862 Do you read me? 650 01:15:47.146 --> 01:15:50.238 (Muffled) Hamilton, Hamilton, do you hear me? 651 01:16:00.494 --> 01:16:01.566 Hello? 652 01:16:03.987 --> 01:16:05.081 Hello? 653 01:16:10.120 --> 01:16:11.181 Hello? 654 01:17:30.044 --> 01:17:32.567 Shh, shh. I'm a cop, I'm a cop. It's OK. 655 01:17:33.005 --> 01:17:34.456 Are you alright? 656 01:17:35.697 --> 01:17:37.215 He's still somewhere in the house... 657 01:17:37.240 --> 01:17:38.777 I'm gonna nail this son of a bitch. 658 01:17:39.540 --> 01:17:40.567 Look out! 659 01:18:06.777 --> 01:18:08.261 Officer? 660 01:18:09.006 --> 01:18:10.825 Mr Officer? 661 01:18:11.261 --> 01:18:12.499 Are you OK? 662 01:18:54.256 --> 01:18:55.941 Screaming! 663 01:19:06.890 --> 01:19:11.477 It truly is a masterpiece... 664 01:19:29.005 --> 01:19:30.891 What the fuck? That can't be it! 665 01:19:31.505 --> 01:19:32.752 That bitch has to die. 666 01:19:32.777 --> 01:19:36.569 I can't have any competition in the form of some strumpet lookalike running around. 667 01:19:37.708 --> 01:19:41.648 And to think, I almost married that fucking guy. What the hell was I thinking? 668 01:19:48.051 --> 01:19:50.250 What the fuck do you mean we were on the air for that? 669 01:19:51.157 --> 01:19:53.289 The sound of police sirens approaching... 670 01:20:29.656 --> 01:20:32.736 Screaming and yelling... 671 01:20:40.007 --> 01:20:43.902 More screaming and yelling... 672 01:21:20.529 --> 01:21:23.218 Screaming... 673 01:21:24.089 --> 01:21:26.444 More screaming... 674 01:21:27.816 --> 01:21:30.595 Still more screaming... 675 01:22:34.842 --> 01:22:36.627 You look like someone... 676 01:22:38.380 --> 01:22:39.585 But I can't remember. 677 01:22:47.503 --> 01:22:49.244 Isn't that nice dear. 678 01:23:09.551 --> 01:23:12.051 (Inaudible) 679 01:24:12.005 --> 01:24:14.356 Thank you for contacting The Federated Collection Agency... 680 01:24:14.381 --> 01:24:15.878 How may I direct your call? 681 01:24:16.324 --> 01:24:20.208 I'd like to report another recently settled account. 682 01:24:20.565 --> 01:24:23.511 Excellent, another satisfied customer? 683 01:24:27.889 --> 01:24:29.697 I'd say extremely...