WEBVTT FILE

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Downloaded from
YTS.MX

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I need you to dig fucking deep

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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

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and bring me everything you've got

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because every single point will

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matter in this game.

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Let's get this fucking one in the

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first half. Let's put some points on

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in the second half. Big effort
please gentlemen.

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Big effort.

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Steelers on three.

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3, 2, 1. Steelers!

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SIMON: Rugby is a really
welcoming sport.

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It's just that those of us

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who are gay

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we're still like, we just
peering out the door

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We're like, are you sure it's safe
to come out?

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Are you sure?

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NIC: We pigeonhole people and we

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keep on, you know, perpetuating

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those cycles of male
hegemony that says

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that we have to be heterosexual.

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We have to act in this way.

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This is what a sportsman looks like.

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And actually, no.

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This is not what a
sportsman looks like.

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DREW: There's this element of
being a rugby player

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even as a gay rugby player

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that there's a certain
masculinity that you need

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to maintain.

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To me, that's bollocks.

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You know, I will be tough and brutal

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and kick your arse on the pitch.

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When I'm off the pitch

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I will be as flagrant

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and as flamboyant as I want.

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EAMMON: This is me.

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Twelve years old.

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Joining my first rugby
club in Australia.

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And this is me now.

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I'm a reporter and a cameraman

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so I'm used to telling stories

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but I've never told one

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this personal.

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For me, this isn't just a story

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about being gay.

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It's not even a story about playing

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rugby.

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It's a story about struggle,

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acceptance

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searching for happiness

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and finding a place to belong.

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Around the time this
photo was taken

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I guess I started to realise
that I was gay

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and for me, it was a struggle.

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It was also the same time that the

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kids at school figured it out.

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Poofta, faggot, fudge packer.

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These were the names I was
pretty much called

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on a daily basis.

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The bullying was unrelenting.

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That was 20 years ago now, but I can

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still remember the shame

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that I carried on my shoulders.

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The fear and the anxiety

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that my family would find out.

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In fact, this rugby club was the only

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place where I wasn't getting bullied.

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Here I wasn't the gay kid.

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Here, I was the total second-rower

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who was good at scoring tries.

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It was the mid 90s.

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Around that very same time something

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was happening on the other side of

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the world in London that would

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drastically change my life

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and the lives of thousands of others.

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A group of friends were
having a drink in a pub

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in London's King's Cross

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and they came up with what was

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at the time a radical idea

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to start the world's first

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gay rugby club.

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And that's how the Kings Cross
Steelers was born.

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MATT: You know, the Steelers were
the first gay rugby team

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in the world.

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We've been in this tournament
many times.

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We've got as far as we have now

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but we've never won it.

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So to be part of the team that

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is the first team from the Steelers

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to win the Bingham Cup

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would be incredible.

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EAMMON: In their first season the

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boys were trying to line up fixtures

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against straight teams across England.

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They sent out 130 invitations.

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But would you believe
only 20 came back.

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It was a different world back then.

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As for straight rugby players, well,

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they were worried about catching
HIV on the pitch.

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But the boys didn't give up.

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And without knowing it

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they had started something big.

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Flash forward two decades from
that single team

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there are now 60 gay clubs around the world

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and every two years they meet

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for the Bingham Cup.

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And this year it's in Amsterdam.

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NIC: We can do this.

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But if we do this

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it'll be against all the odds.

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EAMMON: It's the World Cup
of gay rugby

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and over the next three days

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that's where this story takes place.

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NIC: Okay, so listen up.

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A couple of things that I want us to

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think about now

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is that we really switched on and we're a squad.

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EAMMON: And even though the Steelers
were the first gay rugby club

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they've never won this tournament.

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And these boys are their biggest
competition this week:

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The Sydney Convicts.

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Player: I could feel their trepidation.

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I could feel their eyes like
darting from player to player

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Thinking: Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
Oh, shit. Oh, shit ...

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I could feel it, you know.

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Rob: So it's just putting some
pressure on them

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and hopefully breaking them down.

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But everything is on them.

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There's no pressure on us whatsoever.

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Steelers. Steelers.

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NIC: Well, tomorrow
we've got the Convicts

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and they're pretty much

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what this team feel are

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one of the main competitors and

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that's our first game up.

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So we have to have our heads on

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first thing.

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EAMMON: So in this story, there are

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three people I want you to meet:

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Simon

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Drew

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and Nic, the head coach.

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NIC: When something goes wrong,

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you're just going to POG it.

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So you're going to 'Play Our Game'.

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Do you like that?

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I've thought about that for a while.

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EAMMON: Nic's been the
Director of Rugby

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for 3 years at the Steelers.

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NIC: So go and tell that person

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about something they did really good

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None of this banter about putting

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each other down right now, OK?

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I have a lot of secret nerves that I

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try to keep as far
away from the boys.

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I feel like I'm there with them.

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So I pick up all of those player nerves.

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So I get that sicky tummy.

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I get all those kind of feelings as

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if I'm about to walk on the pitch.

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EAMMON: And after this tournament,

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Nic is stepping down
as the head coach.

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NIC: That's kind of the end

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of my journey,

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really, is to watch them
play their best.

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EAMMON: Bit emotional?

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NIC: Yeah.
EAMMON: How come?

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NIC: Because...

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I've been with them for three years.

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And some of the boys ...

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been on that journey
for three years.

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And we were rubbish.

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I mean

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we got tonked.

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We had ...

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we, we had

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70, 80 points put on us when I first

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came to the club

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and, um

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I've watched players

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grow.

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So ...

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And what I found was

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my first year, not so much now,

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but in my first year,

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I found that I had these
really great players

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who had a real lack of self belief.

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It's like:

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'I can be a really confident
gay person,

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and I can be really confident
in the club,

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and I can be really confident
with my friends,

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and I'm a brilliant person
in the workplace,

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and I'm a super successful businessman.

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But on the sport's pitch
that doesn't belong to me.

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This is not my home.

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Can I stop you here?

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Every single one of you

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have put a 'but' into
your conversation.

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Cut that out now because

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we're here to look at our positives

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because actually we want

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to work on our really good stuff.

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SIMON: If we get that right here

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that will take us a long way.

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We started to get it going.

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Player: Simon?

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NIC: So I think I spent my
first year really

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just confirming

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to them that

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they do belong

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that they're sportsmen,

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that they are entitled to their

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place on the pitch.

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So I feel emotional because

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I've seen that growth

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in these human beings.

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And I love my sport.

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And I think it's done so many

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brilliant things for me

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so to see

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it do brilliant things for them

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just makes me really happy.

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Happy?!

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Told you I'd cry, ay?

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Getting it out in front of you,
not in front

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of the players.

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Kept my cool earlier in

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the team talk.

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ROB: One last thing. Bingham
tradition

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for the Steelers.

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Get your toes out boys.
Toes now a painting.

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EAMMON: So before the
tournament kicks off

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first thing's first.

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ROB: No excuses.
Blue and green. No excuses.

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(upbeat music)

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NIC: I would even allow
you to do mine.

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Awesome.

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(laughter)

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EAMMON: So I never wore
nail polish as a kid

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but I loved dressing up
in my mom's clothes

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and I always wore pink.

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So the signs were definitely there.

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But the happy kid that I
see in these photos

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didn't stay happy for long.

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So here I am editing this documentary

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and I don't have any pictures

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to go over the next bit.

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One of my first gay experiences

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happened when I was 16.

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It was with a boy from one of
my sports classes

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He invited me for a sleepover.

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We drank.

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We ended up messing around.

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And without me knowing it

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he set up a camera in the corner of the

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room and was filming it.

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I remember what happened

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pretty vividly.

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It was a Friday afternoon at school.

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I'd just finished class and I was

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walking back to the dorm in

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my boarding school

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and it was like a scene from a movie.

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People were looking at me,

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whispering, sniggering.

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Someone yelled out this boy's
surname at me

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and was laughing.

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The blood started rushing to my face.

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My world was spinning.

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It was almost like I was floating
outside my body

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having this kind of
out of body experience.

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This was the moment
I was going to be outed.

275
00:12:32.120 --> 00:12:34.360
I went into the room in my
boarding house

276
00:12:34.360 --> 00:12:36.120
and I tried to stay calm.

277
00:12:36.120 --> 00:12:38.520
And finally someone told me
what had happened.

278
00:12:39.320 --> 00:12:41.720
This boy had come to school
with the videotape

279
00:12:41.720 --> 00:12:43.320
and shown it.

280
00:12:44.080 --> 00:12:46.000
And this was probably one of

281
00:12:46.000 --> 00:12:48.640
the worst moments in my life

282
00:12:48.640 --> 00:12:51.400
being outed at an all boys school.

283
00:12:51.760 --> 00:12:53.600
I was so desperate for help that

284
00:12:53.600 --> 00:12:55.640
I called my dad and said

285
00:12:55.640 --> 00:12:57.840
that we were drunk and messing around.

286
00:12:58.120 --> 00:13:00.000
He went down to the boy's parent's

287
00:13:00.000 --> 00:13:02.360
house and destroyed the tape.

288
00:13:02.600 --> 00:13:05.080
And I'll be forever grateful for him

289
00:13:05.080 --> 00:13:06.160
for doing that.

290
00:13:06.160 --> 00:13:07.800
And we didn't really

291
00:13:07.800 --> 00:13:09.680
talk about whether I was gay or not.

292
00:13:09.680 --> 00:13:11.320
I certainly didn't bring it up.

293
00:13:11.600 --> 00:13:15.680
But the bullying went from
bad to worse.

294
00:13:16.200 --> 00:13:19.080
Before I was just surviving

295
00:13:19.080 --> 00:13:21.120
and now I felt like

296
00:13:21.120 --> 00:13:22.600
I was drowning.

297
00:13:25.600 --> 00:13:26.800
SIMON: Is the sound working?

298
00:13:26.800 --> 00:13:27.800
Are we ready to go?

299
00:13:27.800 --> 00:13:29.520
We're going to start?
Are you rolling?

300
00:13:29.520 --> 00:13:31.280
- Yeah
- Oh, we're rolling?

301
00:13:31.280 --> 00:13:31.960
Okay.

302
00:13:31.960 --> 00:13:35.040
EAMMON: So Simon is the second
person I want you to meet.

303
00:13:35.040 --> 00:13:36.920
Until recently, he played rugby

304
00:13:36.920 --> 00:13:38.600
at a fairly high level in Birmingham

305
00:13:38.600 --> 00:13:39.800
and north London.

306
00:13:39.800 --> 00:13:41.480
But he wasn't out.

307
00:13:41.480 --> 00:13:43.200
SIMON: I was a guy who knew from the

308
00:13:43.200 --> 00:13:45.320
age of about 10 years old that

309
00:13:45.760 --> 00:13:47.840
he was attracted to the same

310
00:13:47.840 --> 00:13:49.760
sex that decided

311
00:13:49.760 --> 00:13:52.440
very early that that was
just not a thing.

312
00:13:52.440 --> 00:13:54.400
I just didn't see how I could come out

313
00:13:54.400 --> 00:13:56.920
and still do what I wanted to do.

314
00:13:59.960 --> 00:14:02.080
I didn't really know I was in a struggle

315
00:14:02.360 --> 00:14:03.520
until

316
00:14:05.760 --> 00:14:07.880
Yeah, I decided that, you know,

317
00:14:07.880 --> 00:14:09.960
obviously people settle down

318
00:14:09.960 --> 00:14:11.680
and start getting married and ...

319
00:14:14.600 --> 00:14:15.840
Yeah, I um.

320
00:14:16.400 --> 00:14:17.400
Yeah.

321
00:14:17.600 --> 00:14:18.920
I guess I um ...

322
00:14:19.840 --> 00:14:21.760
I changed my mind and it was

323
00:14:21.760 --> 00:14:23.720
kind of weird, like, to have

324
00:14:23.720 --> 00:14:26.600
this whole life philosophy
that had worked.

325
00:14:26.600 --> 00:14:27.840
I was happy.

326
00:14:27.840 --> 00:14:30.760
And I was like, yeah,
privately I knew that I was gay

327
00:14:30.760 --> 00:14:33.080
but I was like: I'm going to be
the uncle and the

328
00:14:33.080 --> 00:14:35.640
best friend and the son.

329
00:14:35.640 --> 00:14:38.120
And I don't need a relationship.

330
00:14:41.720 --> 00:14:43.480
And it's weird. I used to look at --

331
00:14:43.480 --> 00:14:44.560
sounds so childlike, but because

332
00:14:44.560 --> 00:14:46.800
this view was formed
when I was a kid.

333
00:14:46.800 --> 00:14:48.560
We got a black labrador
when I was 12

334
00:14:48.560 --> 00:14:49.880
and I used to always say

335
00:14:49.880 --> 00:14:52.600
Rolo doesn't need a partner,

336
00:14:52.600 --> 00:14:53.960
like he's happy just bouncing around

337
00:14:53.960 --> 00:14:56.000
and goes for a walk in the park.

338
00:14:56.000 --> 00:14:57.000
So I always say,

339
00:14:57.960 --> 00:15:00.400
I based my life decisions around

340
00:15:00.400 --> 00:15:02.720
the black labrador family pet,

341
00:15:02.720 --> 00:15:03.520
right?

342
00:15:03.560 --> 00:15:04.800
Which is strange.

343
00:15:09.720 --> 00:15:12.640
EAMMON: Two years ago,
Simon realised it was time

344
00:15:12.640 --> 00:15:14.920
to be his true self.

345
00:15:15.640 --> 00:15:18.320
SIMON: When I went through
the process of trying to

346
00:15:18.760 --> 00:15:21.440
you know, deciding I wanted
to come out as gay

347
00:15:21.440 --> 00:15:23.440
I was shocked by

348
00:15:23.960 --> 00:15:26.040
how much

349
00:15:26.040 --> 00:15:28.040
there was built in.

350
00:15:28.040 --> 00:15:29.040
And it was.

351
00:15:29.760 --> 00:15:32.920
It was ... obviously
a lot of it was in me

352
00:15:35.280 --> 00:15:37.520
that I didn't know, you know.

353
00:15:38.880 --> 00:15:42.120
Trying to think ... telling my
little brother ... it was

354
00:15:42.120 --> 00:15:44.640
we went for a walk up
and down the river

355
00:15:46.520 --> 00:15:48.240
My little brother is the most welcoming guy.

356
00:15:48.240 --> 00:15:50.360
There's no way he's gonna
have a problem with it.

357
00:15:50.360 --> 00:15:51.800
I really struggled.

358
00:15:51.800 --> 00:15:53.240
And we were walked up and down

359
00:15:53.240 --> 00:15:54.240
up and down.

360
00:15:54.240 --> 00:15:57.480
I walk like one more walk, one more
walk, one more walk.

361
00:15:57.480 --> 00:15:58.480
And

362
00:15:59.320 --> 00:16:01.080
I just couldn't say the words.

363
00:16:01.080 --> 00:16:02.200
And I was ahhh.

364
00:16:02.200 --> 00:16:03.800
Even though at this point

365
00:16:03.800 --> 00:16:06.080
I'm thinking he must know what I'm
about to say, right?

366
00:16:06.080 --> 00:16:07.960
But he wouldn't do it for me.

367
00:16:08.640 --> 00:16:10.880
In the end after about literally
an hour and a half

368
00:16:10.880 --> 00:16:13.920
I said Tom, I said you've

369
00:16:13.920 --> 00:16:16.720
you've got a gay brother and it's not Dave,

370
00:16:16.720 --> 00:16:18.520
that's all I could say, our older brother.

371
00:16:18.840 --> 00:16:20.440
And he was, yeah.

372
00:16:20.440 --> 00:16:22.280
He said I'm really

373
00:16:22.280 --> 00:16:24.160
I'm really happy because

374
00:16:24.160 --> 00:16:26.800
he recognised that wasn't the start.

375
00:16:26.800 --> 00:16:27.960
That was the

376
00:16:27.960 --> 00:16:28.920
I guess the um

377
00:16:28.920 --> 00:16:30.960
culmination of a lot of thinking

378
00:16:30.960 --> 00:16:33.160
over the previous 12 or 18 months.

379
00:16:33.880 --> 00:16:34.920
EAMMON: But as Simon took his first

380
00:16:34.920 --> 00:16:37.040
steps out of the closet, he tripped.

381
00:16:37.040 --> 00:16:39.960
He'd fallen in love with a childhood friend

382
00:16:39.960 --> 00:16:42.080
a straight guy, who we'll call Jack.

383
00:16:42.080 --> 00:16:43.560
Jack said some things that he

384
00:16:43.560 --> 00:16:45.120
probably didn't think about how it

385
00:16:45.120 --> 00:16:46.760
would impact SIMON

386
00:16:46.760 --> 00:16:49.400
and they cut very deep.

387
00:16:52.360 --> 00:16:54.480
EAMMON : Did that lead
to the other sort of stuff

388
00:16:54.480 --> 00:16:56.160
like the depression?

389
00:16:56.160 --> 00:16:58.280
Or feed into it at least?

390
00:16:58.280 --> 00:16:59.280
SIMON: Yeah.

391
00:17:01.080 --> 00:17:02.600
Yeah, definitely.

392
00:17:08.800 --> 00:17:09.920
EAMMON: Simon's being very worried

393
00:17:09.920 --> 00:17:11.280
about this part of the documentary

394
00:17:11.280 --> 00:17:12.600
because he doesn't want to blame

395
00:17:12.600 --> 00:17:13.360
Jack.

396
00:17:13.360 --> 00:17:14.880
He understands it was a difficult

397
00:17:14.880 --> 00:17:16.480
situation for both of them.

398
00:17:16.960 --> 00:17:18.400
Jack was brought up to believe that

399
00:17:18.400 --> 00:17:20.880
being gay was unnatural and wrong.

400
00:17:21.040 --> 00:17:23.080
But nonetheless, his words had

401
00:17:23.080 --> 00:17:24.360
a very big impact.

402
00:17:25.000 --> 00:17:26.280
SIMON: Then ...

403
00:17:26.680 --> 00:17:27.680
I ...

404
00:17:29.760 --> 00:17:32.080
I found, I found ... um ...

405
00:17:35.320 --> 00:17:36.920
I found the road from there a lot

406
00:17:36.920 --> 00:17:38.880
harder than I expected.

407
00:17:46.320 --> 00:17:47.800
ALEX: This week is a special

408
00:17:47.800 --> 00:17:49.200
time for our club.

409
00:17:49.200 --> 00:17:50.480
We've got six teams.

410
00:17:50.960 --> 00:17:53.480
We are the biggest component
of this tournament.

411
00:17:53.480 --> 00:17:54.800
We're going to go out and give it

412
00:17:54.800 --> 00:17:56.400
our absolute best.

413
00:17:56.400 --> 00:17:57.960
NIC: And I just want to say

414
00:17:57.960 --> 00:18:00.880
just love every moment that
you're on the pitch.

415
00:18:00.880 --> 00:18:03.040
And then Sunday night, just go wild.

416
00:18:03.520 --> 00:18:05.360
(group cheers)

417
00:18:07.280 --> 00:18:09.760
NIC: So we got a sixth place last time

418
00:18:10.400 --> 00:18:12.360
And I believe with the set

419
00:18:12.360 --> 00:18:14.560
of players that we have and the team

420
00:18:14.560 --> 00:18:16.120
that we have

421
00:18:16.480 --> 00:18:19.360
that we're in with a chance

422
00:18:19.360 --> 00:18:21.560
to actually come away with a win.

423
00:18:26.160 --> 00:18:27.960
Stop no pictures, no pictures.

424
00:18:37.520 --> 00:18:40.280
ROB: This is where it starts.
First game.

425
00:18:40.560 --> 00:18:43.440
NIC: There's a few players that
the nerves are

426
00:18:43.440 --> 00:18:44.920
overtaking them a little bit.

427
00:18:44.920 --> 00:18:46.600
But I'm trying to keep them

428
00:18:46.600 --> 00:18:48.000
keep them nice and low.

429
00:18:48.000 --> 00:18:48.960
Keep them calm.

430
00:18:49.200 --> 00:18:50.200
Nerves?

431
00:18:52.320 --> 00:18:53.320
Should be buzzing.

432
00:18:53.800 --> 00:18:55.800
Good nerves. They're good nerves.

433
00:18:56.520 --> 00:18:58.160
ALEX: So starting line up.

434
00:18:58.160 --> 00:18:59.960
Drew McDowell at loose head prop.

435
00:19:01.080 --> 00:19:02.280
NIC: I think they're all worrying

436
00:19:02.280 --> 00:19:04.280
because this is their main competition.

437
00:19:04.280 --> 00:19:06.160
So if they keep everything really positive

438
00:19:06.160 --> 00:19:07.880
they'll focus on their strengths and

439
00:19:08.200 --> 00:19:09.880
not let the kind of, um ...

440
00:19:10.040 --> 00:19:11.960
that kind of voice

441
00:19:12.680 --> 00:19:13.960
talk them down.

442
00:19:17.560 --> 00:19:18.920
EAMMON: So game one.

443
00:19:18.920 --> 00:19:20.200
The Sydney Convicts.

444
00:19:20.200 --> 00:19:23.640
The Steelers need to win
3 of their first 4 round games

445
00:19:23.640 --> 00:19:25.040
to make it to the semi-finals.

446
00:19:25.040 --> 00:19:27.520
And this is set to be the toughest.

447
00:19:31.400 --> 00:19:33.320
ROB: We are used to pressured games.

448
00:19:33.320 --> 00:19:34.880
We are used to fucking contact.

449
00:20:08.120 --> 00:20:10.720
EAMMON: The Steelers score first
with a penalty goal.

450
00:20:12.200 --> 00:20:13.880
But then the Convicts take the lead

451
00:20:13.880 --> 00:20:16.120
with one try and then another.

452
00:20:18.360 --> 00:20:20.400
Half time, we're down and points

453
00:20:20.400 --> 00:20:22.480
and down a man with concussion.

454
00:20:23.360 --> 00:20:26.280
ALEX: 20 minutes we've got here.
PLAYER: We've done this before.

455
00:20:28.000 --> 00:20:30.760
We've done this before
and we're going to do it again!

456
00:20:30.760 --> 00:20:32.560
You absolutely how it in you!

457
00:20:32.560 --> 00:20:35.680
You've got more in that tank!
More to give!

458
00:20:35.680 --> 00:20:36.680
C'mon on!

459
00:21:02.160 --> 00:21:04.960
EAMMON: Final score ...
Sydney Convicts - 12

460
00:21:04.960 --> 00:21:07.560
Kings Cross Steelers - 3.

461
00:21:46.160 --> 00:21:48.360
NIC: I'm going to say one thing.

462
00:21:48.360 --> 00:21:50.280
That shit show at the end

463
00:21:50.280 --> 00:21:51.640
is not Steeler's way.

464
00:21:51.640 --> 00:21:52.960
And if I see that one more time,

465
00:21:52.960 --> 00:21:54.960
you're off the game,
you're off the tournament

466
00:21:54.960 --> 00:21:56.680
because you're not playing
in my fucking team.

467
00:21:56.680 --> 00:21:57.640
Okay?

468
00:21:57.640 --> 00:21:59.280
I'm not having that bullshit.

469
00:21:59.280 --> 00:22:00.960
We're at a tournament

470
00:22:00.960 --> 00:22:03.000
with a brotherhood here.

471
00:22:03.000 --> 00:22:03.960
Not having it.

472
00:22:03.960 --> 00:22:04.960
Full stop.

473
00:22:08.120 --> 00:22:09.920
Last word on that - number one.

474
00:22:09.920 --> 00:22:11.000
Number two ...

475
00:22:12.080 --> 00:22:15.960
we didn't trust our structure
for about 18 minutes, okay?

476
00:22:15.960 --> 00:22:19.280
We need to do what
we're really good at, okay?

477
00:22:19.280 --> 00:22:21.080
What we are really good at.

478
00:22:21.080 --> 00:22:23.040
So we're going to learn from that.

479
00:22:23.040 --> 00:22:24.680
We're gonna step up from that

480
00:22:24.680 --> 00:22:26.280
because I'm disappointed

481
00:22:26.280 --> 00:22:27.760
you're disappointed

482
00:22:27.760 --> 00:22:29.600
and there's plenty more in the tank.

483
00:22:29.600 --> 00:22:30.600
OK?

484
00:22:30.920 --> 00:22:33.120
NIC: I think that I

485
00:22:33.120 --> 00:22:35.040
probably give out

486
00:22:35.040 --> 00:22:38.360
this really fearsome (laughs)

487
00:22:39.280 --> 00:22:41.160
I would say I'm
probably a fierce

488
00:22:41.160 --> 00:22:42.320
female.

489
00:22:42.320 --> 00:22:44.400
And so I might

490
00:22:44.400 --> 00:22:46.560
just slightly terrify

491
00:22:46.560 --> 00:22:48.440
a couple of people.

492
00:22:50.160 --> 00:22:52.000
And that's OK, because

493
00:22:52.000 --> 00:22:54.320
I kind of quite like that fierce

494
00:22:54.320 --> 00:22:55.640
female part.

495
00:22:56.640 --> 00:22:58.680
But those people that

496
00:22:58.680 --> 00:23:01.480
spend time trying to
get to know me

497
00:23:01.480 --> 00:23:02.760
realise actually

498
00:23:02.760 --> 00:23:04.120
I'm a bit of a pussy cat.

499
00:23:04.120 --> 00:23:05.880
NIC: You are a fantastic team.

500
00:23:05.880 --> 00:23:07.680
Believe in your structure.

501
00:23:07.680 --> 00:23:09.200
Believe in the way that we play

502
00:23:09.200 --> 00:23:10.920
rugby the Steelers way.

503
00:23:12.040 --> 00:23:13.800
SIMON: We decided just before kick off

504
00:23:13.800 --> 00:23:14.920
we're going to throw the first game

505
00:23:14.920 --> 00:23:16.880
so we can stay undercover

506
00:23:16.880 --> 00:23:18.520
so these boys think that they got us

507
00:23:18.520 --> 00:23:19.960
but they haven't.

508
00:23:20.720 --> 00:23:22.320
Nah, they came at us

509
00:23:22.320 --> 00:23:23.560
with a lot of physicality.

510
00:23:23.560 --> 00:23:25.760
DREW: But I think if we keep
building on through

511
00:23:25.760 --> 00:23:27.280
tournament, each game,

512
00:23:27.280 --> 00:23:28.920
keep working through our structures,

513
00:23:28.920 --> 00:23:30.640
we'll see Convicts in the final and

514
00:23:30.640 --> 00:23:33.160
then get a second chance at it.

515
00:23:36.400 --> 00:23:37.880
PLAYER: Beaten by my old team.

516
00:23:37.880 --> 00:23:39.120
So that's never a good thing.

517
00:23:39.120 --> 00:23:40.840
Put some good play together in the
second half and hopefully we can

518
00:23:40.840 --> 00:23:42.520
come up against them in the final.

519
00:23:46.840 --> 00:23:47.840
Fuck!

520
00:23:47.960 --> 00:23:49.520
EAMMON: So while the players recover,

521
00:23:49.520 --> 00:23:52.120
NIC snuck away to play a quick game herself.

522
00:23:52.120 --> 00:23:53.960
The last time she wore rugby boots,

523
00:23:53.960 --> 00:23:55.840
she was playing for Wales.

524
00:23:56.760 --> 00:23:58.400
NIC: I think I've gone a bit crazy

525
00:23:58.400 --> 00:24:00.320
and decided to come out of retirement.

526
00:24:00.320 --> 00:24:03.240
- How many years?
- Six years.

527
00:24:03.240 --> 00:24:05.960
- So who are you playing for and what position?

528
00:24:05.960 --> 00:24:08.480
- I'm not sure. We're just playing 10s.

529
00:24:10.440 --> 00:24:12.400
I'm playing where ever I'm put.

530
00:24:12.400 --> 00:24:16.320
- Oh God! Is it a big deal for you?
- No, well, yeah maybe.

531
00:24:16.800 --> 00:24:18.200
- Good luck.
- We'll see.

532
00:24:19.000 --> 00:24:20.400
EAMMON: So how does a gay woman

533
00:24:20.400 --> 00:24:23.320
come to coach a gay men's rugby club?

534
00:24:25.080 --> 00:24:28.320
NIC: Okay, so Gilbert Evans ...

535
00:24:29.000 --> 00:24:31.520
born, bred Caerphilly.

536
00:24:32.160 --> 00:24:35.600
Played rugby, football and cricket.

537
00:24:36.240 --> 00:24:38.520
Refereed in later life.

538
00:24:38.520 --> 00:24:40.800
Treasurer of Caerphilly Rugby Club.

539
00:24:41.240 --> 00:24:45.240
Hugely disappointed that I was a girl

540
00:24:45.640 --> 00:24:49.520
and told me so in no uncertain
terms when I was about 12

541
00:24:49.760 --> 00:24:52.160
and I was the only grandchild

542
00:24:52.160 --> 00:24:54.160
so he was stuck with me at that point.

543
00:24:54.600 --> 00:24:56.960
My brother and sister came along
a bit later on.

544
00:24:57.560 --> 00:25:00.400
And informed me that in his disappointment

545
00:25:00.400 --> 00:25:02.240
that he'd have to put up with it

546
00:25:02.240 --> 00:25:04.760
and that he's decided to pretend

547
00:25:04.760 --> 00:25:07.320
that I am a boy on a Saturday afternoon.

548
00:25:07.360 --> 00:25:11.360
So I got my first season ticket to Cardiff Rugby Club

549
00:25:11.360 --> 00:25:14.800
aged twelve when I went to senior school.

550
00:25:16.600 --> 00:25:19.120
From the age of 12, my grandfather took me.

551
00:25:19.120 --> 00:25:22.000
I was allowed to swear once
we got through the stalls.

552
00:25:22.000 --> 00:25:25.160
But as soon as we got through
the turnstiles on the way out,

553
00:25:25.160 --> 00:25:26.640
no more swearing.

554
00:25:27.320 --> 00:25:29.840
And he stood by my side

555
00:25:29.840 --> 00:25:30.840
for

556
00:25:32.480 --> 00:25:34.560
seven years and

557
00:25:35.200 --> 00:25:37.280
taught me the referee's perspective,

558
00:25:37.280 --> 00:25:39.200
taught me the fullback's perspective,

559
00:25:39.200 --> 00:25:40.800
the ten's perspective,

560
00:25:41.320 --> 00:25:43.240
and just talked me through the rugby match.

561
00:25:43.240 --> 00:25:44.960
He taught me why that penalty happened,

562
00:25:44.960 --> 00:25:47.040
what was happening in that ruck,

563
00:25:47.040 --> 00:25:48.880
why was that scrum pulled down.

564
00:25:48.880 --> 00:25:49.880
And he just ...

565
00:25:50.840 --> 00:25:54.000
he loved sharing that knowledge with me.

566
00:25:54.000 --> 00:25:56.480
And we had just this connection.

567
00:25:56.960 --> 00:25:58.840
So age 17,

568
00:25:58.840 --> 00:26:00.520
I got my first car

569
00:26:00.520 --> 00:26:03.280
and literally the first thing I did

570
00:26:03.280 --> 00:26:06.160
was drive on a Tuesday night down to rugby.

571
00:26:06.400 --> 00:26:08.920
So this game that I knew

572
00:26:08.920 --> 00:26:10.720
inside out

573
00:26:10.720 --> 00:26:12.400
I'd never played.

574
00:26:13.240 --> 00:26:17.480
So possibly one of the most exciting nights
of my life.

575
00:26:17.760 --> 00:26:22.360
And at the time, I was about eight stone

576
00:26:22.360 --> 00:26:24.440
so a little bit smaller.

577
00:26:24.440 --> 00:26:26.800
And I played on the wing

578
00:26:27.600 --> 00:26:31.000
and I just I thought this is the
best thing in the world.

579
00:26:31.000 --> 00:26:32.000
So

580
00:26:32.600 --> 00:26:34.000
I played at university.

581
00:26:34.000 --> 00:26:36.160
Then I went off to the university

582
00:26:36.160 --> 00:26:38.680
and I got into the university team

583
00:26:40.240 --> 00:26:42.200
I came home at Christmas

584
00:26:42.200 --> 00:26:44.320
and my grandfather said to me,

585
00:26:44.320 --> 00:26:46.080
"Ah, I'm just so ashamed of myself"

586
00:26:46.080 --> 00:26:47.680
And I said why grandad?
And he was like,

587
00:26:47.680 --> 00:26:51.640
"Oh, your grandmother's got
it in for me, it's all my fault."

588
00:26:51.640 --> 00:26:52.720
I said, what's happened?

589
00:26:52.720 --> 00:26:54.920
"You're going to get breast cancer."

590
00:26:54.920 --> 00:26:57.400
I'm like what do you mean
I'm going to get breast cancer?

591
00:26:57.400 --> 00:27:00.360
He's like, "Well, all those tackling.

592
00:27:00.360 --> 00:27:02.800
Is there anything you can have,
like chest pads?"

593
00:27:02.800 --> 00:27:05.640
I'm like, I'm not going to get breast cancer

594
00:27:05.640 --> 00:27:06.640
from rugby.

595
00:27:06.640 --> 00:27:07.880
He's like, "Yeah but you're going to

596
00:27:07.880 --> 00:27:09.200
take all those hits to your breasts."

597
00:27:09.200 --> 00:27:11.920
I'm like, you really do not need to be worrying

598
00:27:11.920 --> 00:27:12.960
about my breasts.

599
00:27:12.960 --> 00:27:15.200
My breasts are all good.

600
00:27:15.800 --> 00:27:17.600
And he's like, "And your teeth.

601
00:27:17.600 --> 00:27:19.120
You've got such nice teeth."

602
00:27:19.360 --> 00:27:22.160
So was he was super disappointed.

603
00:27:23.320 --> 00:27:25.840
And he blamed himself for my

604
00:27:25.840 --> 00:27:27.360
love of rugby.

605
00:27:27.360 --> 00:27:28.360
So

606
00:27:29.320 --> 00:27:33.400
he had a major stroke as I went to university.

607
00:27:33.400 --> 00:27:36.040
And he spent the rest of his life,

608
00:27:36.040 --> 00:27:38.760
twelve years, in a nursing home.

609
00:27:38.760 --> 00:27:39.760
So

610
00:27:40.480 --> 00:27:43.440
my first Six Nations playing for Wales --

611
00:27:44.200 --> 00:27:47.760
and I cried then too by the way.

612
00:27:48.240 --> 00:27:49.960
I'm a cryer --

613
00:27:49.960 --> 00:27:53.600
And I line up against Ireland

614
00:27:53.600 --> 00:27:55.000
and I look up

615
00:27:55.000 --> 00:27:57.360
and my nan is there, and she's only four foot ten.

616
00:27:57.360 --> 00:27:58.840
So there's this tiny little woman,

617
00:27:58.840 --> 00:28:01.320
with this massive scarf and a big wolly hat

618
00:28:01.320 --> 00:28:03.720
watching me, waving at me.

619
00:28:03.720 --> 00:28:04.720
And

620
00:28:06.160 --> 00:28:07.960
she come up to me at the end of the game

621
00:28:07.960 --> 00:28:09.400
and she's like, "Your grandfather

622
00:28:09.400 --> 00:28:12.240
would have been just so proud of you right now.

623
00:28:13.160 --> 00:28:14.880
He never said it

624
00:28:14.880 --> 00:28:15.880
because he was always a bit frightened

625
00:28:15.880 --> 00:28:17.680
you were going to get hurt,

626
00:28:19.160 --> 00:28:20.760
but he'd be really proud of you."

627
00:28:20.760 --> 00:28:23.640
So, he never got to see me play.

628
00:28:23.640 --> 00:28:24.640
But

629
00:28:25.920 --> 00:28:27.840
he's always with me

630
00:28:27.840 --> 00:28:30.120
on the pitch, near the pitch.

631
00:28:30.120 --> 00:28:32.240
So ... hence the reason

632
00:28:32.240 --> 00:28:34.920
why I'm a rugby obsessed.

633
00:28:45.840 --> 00:28:47.520
EAMMON: Do you think you feel him here

634
00:28:47.520 --> 00:28:49.360
here with you this week?

635
00:28:50.640 --> 00:28:52.720
NIC: Yes, and I think ...

636
00:28:56.120 --> 00:29:01.800
he was immensely proud of all my achievements.

637
00:29:01.800 --> 00:29:03.120
Anything that I did.

638
00:29:03.120 --> 00:29:04.960
He would drive me anywhere.

639
00:29:04.960 --> 00:29:09.400
He would fuel that passion.

640
00:29:09.400 --> 00:29:11.560
So I think

641
00:29:11.560 --> 00:29:13.600
for him to know

642
00:29:13.600 --> 00:29:17.000
that so many years on

643
00:29:17.000 --> 00:29:19.560
that he still fuels my passion.

644
00:29:19.560 --> 00:29:23.560
I think ... that's pretty special, isn't it?

645
00:29:36.960 --> 00:29:38.720
DREW: I told you not to kill anyone.

646
00:29:38.720 --> 00:29:39.800
NIC: I didn't.

647
00:29:39.800 --> 00:29:41.840
I was nice. I played nice Evans.

648
00:29:43.320 --> 00:29:45.320
COACH: You love a bit of constant
infringing don't you?

649
00:29:45.320 --> 00:29:47.640
In at the side, clobbering that bird.

650
00:29:49.360 --> 00:29:52.400
- Still go it. Could've been a contender.
- I wish.

651
00:29:53.160 --> 00:29:55.120
EAMMON: You got so close at the end.

652
00:29:55.120 --> 00:29:58.080
- My God. That was so good.
- Ahhh! I should've scored.

653
00:29:58.080 --> 00:30:00.160
- NIC, how was that?
- Horrendous.

654
00:30:00.160 --> 00:30:02.960
I can remember why I retired now.

655
00:30:03.600 --> 00:30:05.120
Oh well.

656
00:30:05.120 --> 00:30:10.160
- But worth doing?
- Yeah it was really nice to play in the Bingham Cup.

657
00:30:10.160 --> 00:30:12.480
So, know what the boys feel like.

658
00:30:12.480 --> 00:30:13.800
- What did it feel like?

659
00:30:13.800 --> 00:30:15.960
Um really nervous.

660
00:30:15.960 --> 00:30:17.240
First game in a long time.

661
00:30:17.240 --> 00:30:18.480
Felt really nervous.

662
00:30:18.480 --> 00:30:21.360
I just thought I'd mess it up for everybody.

663
00:30:21.360 --> 00:30:23.000
- But you played awesome.

664
00:30:23.920 --> 00:30:25.560
I didn't do very much.

665
00:30:25.560 --> 00:30:28.480
It's good to get a few hits in.

666
00:30:29.880 --> 00:30:30.880
- Thanks NIC.

667
00:30:38.840 --> 00:30:40.480
EAMMON: Is your gran still alive?

668
00:30:40.480 --> 00:30:42.200
NIC: Ahh, Yeah.

669
00:30:42.200 --> 00:30:43.800
EAMMON: Do you think you call her after

670
00:30:43.800 --> 00:30:45.600
and let her know how you go this week?

671
00:30:45.600 --> 00:30:47.280
NIC: She's in hospital.

672
00:30:48.960 --> 00:30:51.640
But she asks me about my boys.

673
00:30:52.040 --> 00:30:55.560
So I tell her that I coach the gay men's rugby team

674
00:30:56.320 --> 00:30:58.200
and she loves that.

675
00:30:59.360 --> 00:31:02.120
She's like, oh, that's funny.

676
00:31:02.800 --> 00:31:05.440
And I think I think she really loves that

677
00:31:05.440 --> 00:31:06.840
because she always talks about the fact

678
00:31:06.840 --> 00:31:09.440
that life was so different in her era.

679
00:31:11.560 --> 00:31:12.920
I think

680
00:31:13.600 --> 00:31:15.920
she loves the fact

681
00:31:15.920 --> 00:31:17.680
that our society

682
00:31:17.680 --> 00:31:21.240
now embrace gay people

683
00:31:21.240 --> 00:31:23.600
and we're able to have these amazing things

684
00:31:23.600 --> 00:31:24.800
like the Bingham Cup.

685
00:31:25.160 --> 00:31:28.760
We're able to safely walk the streets of Amsterdam

686
00:31:29.600 --> 00:31:32.720
and we're able to celebrate

687
00:31:32.720 --> 00:31:35.040
our own sporting lives.

688
00:31:35.040 --> 00:31:37.360
And I feel that's what Bingham is.

689
00:31:37.360 --> 00:31:41.160
It's a celebration of gay sporting lives.

690
00:32:06.240 --> 00:32:07.240
So I noticed that

691
00:32:07.240 --> 00:32:09.280
I didn't have an American flag in our tent.

692
00:32:09.280 --> 00:32:10.960
So I brought this

693
00:32:10.960 --> 00:32:14.840
and then this is the Man of the Day award.

694
00:32:14.840 --> 00:32:16.800
It's normally a skirt

695
00:32:16.800 --> 00:32:18.520
but it would have been sacrilegious

696
00:32:18.520 --> 00:32:20.200
to cover the flag.

697
00:32:21.280 --> 00:32:22.480
EAMMON: what did you think
of the guy

698
00:32:22.480 --> 00:32:24.400
with the Spangled Banner Speedo.

699
00:32:25.040 --> 00:32:26.880
CHRIS: Oh right. Ummm...

700
00:32:26.880 --> 00:32:29.960
Yes that was quite an interesting outfit.

701
00:32:31.040 --> 00:32:33.280
I wonder he'll wear to the closing party.

702
00:32:33.680 --> 00:32:34.920
CASPAR: Oh you're wondering?

703
00:32:35.600 --> 00:32:36.640
I don't want this.

704
00:32:36.640 --> 00:32:38.000
Get this camera off.

705
00:32:38.480 --> 00:32:40.840
My focus first and foremost is on the rugby.

706
00:32:40.840 --> 00:32:41.800
- Yeah, exactly.

707
00:32:41.800 --> 00:32:43.280
- But second...

708
00:32:43.280 --> 00:32:44.160
EAMMON: speaking of which ...

709
00:32:44.160 --> 00:32:45.880
time for the next game

710
00:32:46.120 --> 00:32:48.320
the Emerald Warriors from Dublin.

711
00:32:48.880 --> 00:32:52.040
NIC: We're going to go out there and
play lots of attacking rugby

712
00:32:52.040 --> 00:32:53.200
right from the off.

713
00:32:53.200 --> 00:32:55.760
There's no taking anything for granted.

714
00:32:55.760 --> 00:32:56.760
Just as many points.

715
00:32:58.280 --> 00:33:00.840
Be my top pain in the arse today.

716
00:33:36.600 --> 00:33:38.760
EAMMON: 73 - 0 to the Steelers.

717
00:33:38.760 --> 00:33:40.320
They're back in the competition

718
00:33:40.320 --> 00:33:42.120
and need just two more wins

719
00:33:42.120 --> 00:33:44.360
if they have a chance of going all the way.

720
00:33:53.600 --> 00:33:54.600
NIC: Thought you were fabulous.

721
00:34:04.600 --> 00:34:07.280
Get some food on board as soon as possible.

722
00:34:07.280 --> 00:34:09.040
PLAYER: Don't worry about that Nic.

723
00:34:10.080 --> 00:34:11.680
Got some down here.

724
00:34:12.520 --> 00:34:14.000
ROB: Louis, as you're a PE teacher

725
00:34:14.000 --> 00:34:15.200
you can fucking launder the shirts.

726
00:34:16.080 --> 00:34:17.560
So shirts off.

727
00:34:17.720 --> 00:34:19.280
And also, last thing for me.

728
00:34:19.280 --> 00:34:21.080
Where is he? Congratulations.

729
00:34:21.080 --> 00:34:22.240
You scored more tries in this tournament

730
00:34:22.240 --> 00:34:23.440
than your boyfriend.

731
00:34:23.440 --> 00:34:24.400
ALL: AYYY!

732
00:34:28.840 --> 00:34:29.800
EAMMON: Well, remember I said

733
00:34:29.800 --> 00:34:31.680
there are three people I want you to meet?

734
00:34:31.680 --> 00:34:33.520
Well, it's kind of four.

735
00:34:33.520 --> 00:34:36.320
Drew and Drewalicious.

736
00:34:45.600 --> 00:34:48.280
DREW: I think Drag just came along

737
00:34:48.280 --> 00:34:50.880
as a bit of a fluke.

738
00:34:53.800 --> 00:34:56.680
EAMMON: So, yes, apparently joining
a gay rugby club

739
00:34:56.680 --> 00:34:58.840
can turn you into a drag queen.

740
00:35:03.160 --> 00:35:04.680
So Drew used to be in charge of

741
00:35:04.680 --> 00:35:06.240
social events at the club

742
00:35:06.600 --> 00:35:08.080
and one night before a big game

743
00:35:08.080 --> 00:35:10.240
when they couldn't drink alcohol

744
00:35:10.240 --> 00:35:13.120
he decided to swap the spirits for stilettos.

745
00:35:13.840 --> 00:35:15.880
DREW: I was smaller than I am now,

746
00:35:15.880 --> 00:35:18.000
but I was still quite stocky.

747
00:35:18.000 --> 00:35:22.080
So to see three quite stocky rugby players

748
00:35:22.080 --> 00:35:24.640
in heels and makeup doing a dance.

749
00:35:24.640 --> 00:35:25.840
No one was expecting it.

750
00:35:25.840 --> 00:35:28.680
So they were just absolutely floored.

751
00:35:28.680 --> 00:35:30.800
And then I realised in that moment

752
00:35:30.800 --> 00:35:35.320
I got to do multiple
things that I love doing.

753
00:35:35.840 --> 00:35:38.200
I got to dance.

754
00:35:38.200 --> 00:35:40.040
I got to perform.

755
00:35:40.400 --> 00:35:42.360
And I got to play a character.

756
00:35:43.280 --> 00:35:46.440
I've created a persona as a drag queen

757
00:35:46.440 --> 00:35:50.120
that is probably an extension of myself,

758
00:35:50.120 --> 00:35:51.280
but just a very wild

759
00:35:51.280 --> 00:35:54.560
and very kind of exaggerated sense.

760
00:35:54.560 --> 00:35:55.720
And I was like,

761
00:35:55.720 --> 00:35:57.920
how can I make this actually last

762
00:35:57.920 --> 00:35:59.760
as long as possible?

763
00:35:59.760 --> 00:36:01.000
Because I kind of love it.

764
00:36:01.000 --> 00:36:03.080
I love being centre of attention.

765
00:36:03.080 --> 00:36:04.960
Everyone knows I love being centre of attention.

766
00:36:04.960 --> 00:36:07.960
And I think it's partly because I
like making people laugh.

767
00:36:07.960 --> 00:36:09.720
I like seeing people smile.

768
00:36:15.920 --> 00:36:17.720
EAMMON: The Devalicious drag show

769
00:36:17.720 --> 00:36:19.440
was so successful

770
00:36:19.440 --> 00:36:22.040
that the club decided to put on a public event

771
00:36:22.040 --> 00:36:23.840
and make it a fundraiser.

772
00:36:31.560 --> 00:36:33.160
DREW: And I was like oh,

773
00:36:33.160 --> 00:36:34.840
I'm possibly going to get nervous again.

774
00:36:34.840 --> 00:36:36.760
And then the first song came on,

775
00:36:36.760 --> 00:36:40.120
which was the first routine that
we did in Manchester.

776
00:36:40.120 --> 00:36:41.640
As soon as we got on stage,

777
00:36:41.640 --> 00:36:43.960
I was like, no, no,

778
00:36:43.960 --> 00:36:45.680
I love this.

779
00:36:45.680 --> 00:36:48.360
Seeing 600 people just looking at me

780
00:36:48.360 --> 00:36:49.480
owning the stage.

781
00:36:49.480 --> 00:36:52.800
I was like, this is something I love.

782
00:36:57.880 --> 00:36:59.400
I kind of soaked it up

783
00:36:59.400 --> 00:37:00.840
and then I got off stage

784
00:37:00.840 --> 00:37:02.400
and it was like I don't want to leave

785
00:37:02.400 --> 00:37:03.720
and then I realised
I don't have to

786
00:37:03.720 --> 00:37:05.320
because I have four other acts.

787
00:37:05.320 --> 00:37:06.560
So it's perfect!

788
00:37:10.720 --> 00:37:12.280
EAMMON: And now it's turned

789
00:37:12.280 --> 00:37:13.840
into an annual event

790
00:37:13.840 --> 00:37:16.080
at the famous Heaven nightclub in London.

791
00:37:26.480 --> 00:37:28.520
And there's even a spinoff.

792
00:37:28.520 --> 00:37:30.560
Steeler's Drag Race.

793
00:37:34.120 --> 00:37:37.080
Yep, these are all rugby players.

794
00:37:41.080 --> 00:37:43.200
And they take it very seriously.

795
00:37:54.200 --> 00:37:55.520
There's a reading challenge

796
00:37:55.520 --> 00:37:57.480
which is kind of like a roast

797
00:38:04.680 --> 00:38:07.080
A Lip-Sync for your life.

798
00:38:12.480 --> 00:38:15.480
And of course, a Lip-Sync, for your legacy

799
00:38:15.480 --> 00:38:17.160
to crown the winner.

800
00:38:21.480 --> 00:38:25.280
The winner is 'Anya Knees'.

801
00:38:42.120 --> 00:38:44.000
DREW: We had some pushback,

802
00:38:44.000 --> 00:38:45.840
especially when we did Heaven

803
00:38:45.840 --> 00:38:49.440
and we did a lot of photoshoots
and promotion ...

804
00:38:50.480 --> 00:38:52.240
being drag queens in the locker room

805
00:38:52.240 --> 00:38:53.320
with other rugby players

806
00:38:53.320 --> 00:38:57.520
and creating that image of butch queens

807
00:38:58.360 --> 00:38:59.640
in drag

808
00:38:59.640 --> 00:39:01.600
and butch queens out of drag.

809
00:39:01.600 --> 00:39:04.840
And some of our previous members

810
00:39:04.840 --> 00:39:07.720
didn't really appreciate that

811
00:39:07.720 --> 00:39:11.400
because they thought we were feeding
into that gay stereotype

812
00:39:11.400 --> 00:39:15.040
that gay men are only sissies.

813
00:39:15.040 --> 00:39:16.880
Or only want to play dress up

814
00:39:16.880 --> 00:39:18.800
in girl's clothes when actually

815
00:39:18.800 --> 00:39:21.360
they looked at it the wrong way.

816
00:39:21.360 --> 00:39:24.400
We were actually welcoming
and promoting

817
00:39:24.400 --> 00:39:27.280
and kind of congratulating people

818
00:39:27.280 --> 00:39:29.160
who are their own people

819
00:39:29.160 --> 00:39:31.040
that they can be rugby players

820
00:39:31.040 --> 00:39:32.520
that they can be drag queens

821
00:39:32.520 --> 00:39:33.720
they can be whatever they want.

822
00:39:33.720 --> 00:39:37.520
And that's not something
to really look down upon.

823
00:39:37.520 --> 00:39:39.080
That's actually something to embrace

824
00:39:39.080 --> 00:39:41.080
and say that's fine.

825
00:39:47.960 --> 00:39:51.040
EAMMON: Day two and the Steelers are
still in with a chance

826
00:39:51.040 --> 00:39:53.040
if they win their next two games.

827
00:39:53.040 --> 00:39:55.680
And just thinking about what Drew was saying

828
00:39:55.680 --> 00:39:58.160
about embracing who you are

829
00:39:58.160 --> 00:40:00.880
and sometimes the hardest person to convince

830
00:40:00.880 --> 00:40:02.000
is yourself.

831
00:40:03.280 --> 00:40:05.680
SIMON: I'm thinking I'm about
to talk about ...

832
00:40:07.160 --> 00:40:09.640
I guess because it's relevant ...

833
00:40:10.680 --> 00:40:12.560
depression ... you know?

834
00:40:13.560 --> 00:40:14.560
which

835
00:40:18.720 --> 00:40:20.080
I'm not like ...

836
00:40:20.640 --> 00:40:23.240
You want to be kind of proud,
don't you right?

837
00:40:25.600 --> 00:40:27.240
You told me you were filming and stuff

838
00:40:27.240 --> 00:40:30.200
and do I want, like, a documentary about ...

839
00:40:30.200 --> 00:40:32.560
where I'm talking about my depression.

840
00:40:32.560 --> 00:40:33.680
Not really.

841
00:40:34.640 --> 00:40:35.600
But it is part ...

842
00:40:35.600 --> 00:40:37.440
It is part of the ...

843
00:40:38.040 --> 00:40:39.960
It is part of the story.

844
00:40:43.960 --> 00:40:45.200
EAMMON: Simon grew up in Birmingham,

845
00:40:45.200 --> 00:40:46.800
an industrial city

846
00:40:46.800 --> 00:40:49.360
and not the easiest of places to come out.

847
00:40:49.800 --> 00:40:50.880
After moving to London

848
00:40:50.880 --> 00:40:53.040
he eventually started telling his friends

849
00:40:53.040 --> 00:40:55.720
and their support was mostly overwhelming.

850
00:40:55.720 --> 00:40:58.400
But the situation with his childhood friend Jack

851
00:40:58.400 --> 00:41:00.240
hadn't improved.

852
00:41:03.520 --> 00:41:05.960
Simon got himself into a muddle

853
00:41:05.960 --> 00:41:07.840
and pulled away from everything he loved,

854
00:41:07.840 --> 00:41:09.400
including rugby,

855
00:41:09.400 --> 00:41:12.720
and he almost quit the sport
he loved to altogether.

856
00:41:12.720 --> 00:41:14.920
But then searching the internet, one day

857
00:41:14.920 --> 00:41:17.000
he stumbled across the Steelers

858
00:41:17.000 --> 00:41:18.720
and he decided to give it a go.

859
00:41:19.200 --> 00:41:21.280
SIMON: There was a couple of weeks
while I was training ...

860
00:41:21.280 --> 00:41:22.920
I wasn't even at work.

861
00:41:22.920 --> 00:41:24.600
I was off work, sick,

862
00:41:24.600 --> 00:41:26.000
lying on the floor most of the day.

863
00:41:26.000 --> 00:41:28.360
Could hardly get out of the flat

864
00:41:28.960 --> 00:41:30.960
and then just be waiting

865
00:41:30.960 --> 00:41:32.400
for six o'clock to come

866
00:41:32.400 --> 00:41:34.480
and I could get my boots on

867
00:41:34.480 --> 00:41:36.440
and get out to play rugby.

868
00:41:36.720 --> 00:41:39.400
And that's how it was for
the first couple months.

869
00:41:43.760 --> 00:41:45.640
But it did ...

870
00:41:45.640 --> 00:41:46.960
it made me smile, you know

871
00:41:46.960 --> 00:41:48.840
and I was so quiet when I started.

872
00:41:48.840 --> 00:41:50.480
I was like ... people were like 'oh'

873
00:41:50.480 --> 00:41:51.480
People now ...

874
00:41:51.480 --> 00:41:52.640
cause they were like ...

875
00:41:52.640 --> 00:41:53.800
they look back ... and they were like

876
00:41:53.800 --> 00:41:54.720
you were quiet when you started

877
00:41:54.720 --> 00:41:55.880
I was always really quiet.

878
00:41:55.880 --> 00:41:57.240
I was just there to play rugby

879
00:41:57.240 --> 00:41:58.560
and just experience it.

880
00:41:58.560 --> 00:42:00.920
Also I was excited because I knew

881
00:42:00.920 --> 00:42:03.280
that it was a turning moment.

882
00:42:07.400 --> 00:42:08.320
Rugby ...

883
00:42:10.320 --> 00:42:12.080
It sounds like it's a bloody religion

884
00:42:12.080 --> 00:42:13.080
when I say it this way

885
00:42:13.080 --> 00:42:16.080
but I'd started to question rugby

886
00:42:16.080 --> 00:42:17.120
which is nuts

887
00:42:17.120 --> 00:42:19.600
because I played rugby
since I was seven years old.

888
00:42:24.120 --> 00:42:25.560
When I got to the rugby club

889
00:42:25.560 --> 00:42:28.360
and it was bringing out all the best of me

890
00:42:28.360 --> 00:42:29.480
but I was still depressed

891
00:42:29.480 --> 00:42:31.000
I was lying on the floor, you know?

892
00:42:32.200 --> 00:42:35.440
I'd then used up my entire deck of cards, right?

893
00:42:35.440 --> 00:42:37.560
And this is where I think

894
00:42:37.560 --> 00:42:39.680
I finally realised that I was ...

895
00:42:39.680 --> 00:42:43.440
you know, would be diagnosed
with depression, was ...

896
00:42:44.360 --> 00:42:46.120
I had my rugby back.

897
00:42:46.120 --> 00:42:49.840
I had everything on paper
was then fine again

898
00:42:50.680 --> 00:42:52.640
but I was still feeling really low.

899
00:42:53.400 --> 00:42:54.400
So, um...

900
00:42:56.160 --> 00:42:57.800
Yeah, I remember. It was weird.

901
00:42:57.800 --> 00:42:58.440
I was ...

902
00:42:58.440 --> 00:42:59.720
Bit of a theme.

903
00:42:59.720 --> 00:43:01.040
I was lying on the floor in the flat

904
00:43:01.040 --> 00:43:02.960
and my friend kept ringing me and saying,

905
00:43:02.960 --> 00:43:05.200
"Have you called the doctor?"

906
00:43:05.200 --> 00:43:06.960
And I was like, yeah,
I'll do it in ten minutes.

907
00:43:07.120 --> 00:43:08.120
I'll do it in ten minutes.

908
00:43:08.120 --> 00:43:09.000
It was the middle of the day.

909
00:43:09.000 --> 00:43:11.200
I wasn't at work and he's like
phoning me up.

910
00:43:11.200 --> 00:43:13.360
And he goes, "I found the number that
you need to dial,

911
00:43:13.360 --> 00:43:14.640
you need to dial this number,
just dial it."

912
00:43:14.640 --> 00:43:15.480
And he sent it to me.

913
00:43:15.480 --> 00:43:16.560
And I'm like okay, I'm on going to dial it.

914
00:43:16.560 --> 00:43:18.160
Ten minutes later, "Have you dialed it?"

915
00:43:18.160 --> 00:43:19.320
No, no ...

916
00:43:19.920 --> 00:43:23.480
I will be forever grateful for that guy

917
00:43:23.480 --> 00:43:24.640
because he phoned the number in the end

918
00:43:24.640 --> 00:43:26.640
he got me the appointment for the next day

919
00:43:26.640 --> 00:43:30.040
and he said, "Get yourself to the doctors,"

920
00:43:30.040 --> 00:43:31.920
and I felt this like weight lifted.

921
00:43:34.880 --> 00:43:37.320
I told him how I'd been feeling

922
00:43:37.320 --> 00:43:39.400
for the last 18 months prior.

923
00:43:39.400 --> 00:43:42.720
And he said, "It's a shame
that you've come to me now."

924
00:43:42.720 --> 00:43:45.520
"You've definitely been depressed."

925
00:43:45.520 --> 00:43:48.840
By that point, I was just ready.
Tell me what to do?!

926
00:43:48.840 --> 00:43:50.640
And it'd spent 18 months saying

927
00:43:50.640 --> 00:43:52.920
no anti-depressants - none of that stuff.

928
00:43:55.360 --> 00:43:59.400
I started on a course
of antidepressants then.

929
00:44:03.240 --> 00:44:05.560
The psychiatrist said to me

930
00:44:05.560 --> 00:44:07.360
"Once you've got through that first month,

931
00:44:07.360 --> 00:44:09.760
you're gonna be chatting to people in the lift

932
00:44:09.760 --> 00:44:10.840
and on the bus,"

933
00:44:10.840 --> 00:44:13.920
and I was like no mate you have no idea.

934
00:44:13.920 --> 00:44:16.240
I'm not going be talking to people in the lift.

935
00:44:16.240 --> 00:44:18.360
And I'll never forget, three months later

936
00:44:18.360 --> 00:44:21.120
going into work, "hey, how's it going?"

937
00:44:21.120 --> 00:44:24.840
Then I caught myself ... oh, it's that thing.

938
00:44:26.080 --> 00:44:27.240
SIMON: How are you feeling Jono?

939
00:44:27.240 --> 00:44:29.680
JONO: I had a wank this morning
so I feel great. No, no ...

940
00:44:31.800 --> 00:44:35.160
- No, how you feeling about the game?
- Ah ... yeah ... you know.

941
00:44:36.120 --> 00:44:38.280
- How many Bingham's you played?

942
00:44:38.280 --> 00:44:39.600
- 4th Bingham mate.

943
00:44:42.680 --> 00:44:47.080
SIMON: So I now advocate
anti-depressants.

944
00:44:47.080 --> 00:44:49.360
I mean, it's weird now I'm talking about it

945
00:44:49.360 --> 00:44:50.600
it feels fine.

946
00:44:52.080 --> 00:44:55.520
I've tried to do my best best to tell people.

947
00:44:55.520 --> 00:44:57.080
I don't see anything wrong with it

948
00:44:57.080 --> 00:44:59.720
and eventually I hope to get off them.

949
00:44:59.720 --> 00:45:02.880
Obviously I had a happy life

950
00:45:02.880 --> 00:45:05.160
up until a couple of years ago, so ...

951
00:45:05.160 --> 00:45:06.480
Should be okay.

952
00:45:21.880 --> 00:45:24.600
EAMMON: I didn't realise how many
scars I had

953
00:45:24.600 --> 00:45:26.120
until after I left school

954
00:45:26.120 --> 00:45:28.200
got away from the bullying

955
00:45:28.200 --> 00:45:30.040
came out and everyone was accepting.

956
00:45:30.040 --> 00:45:32.240
But I still didn't feel happy.

957
00:45:32.440 --> 00:45:33.840
Like Simon,

958
00:45:33.840 --> 00:45:35.360
like so many gay people

959
00:45:35.360 --> 00:45:38.440
despite putting on a smile, I was depressed.

960
00:45:38.440 --> 00:45:39.480
There were many days

961
00:45:39.480 --> 00:45:41.120
where I couldn't get out of bed.

962
00:45:42.080 --> 00:45:45.280
I graduated law school
and got a great job.

963
00:45:45.280 --> 00:45:47.040
But during work sometimes

964
00:45:47.040 --> 00:45:48.640
I would just burst into tears

965
00:45:48.640 --> 00:45:49.840
for no reason.

966
00:45:49.840 --> 00:45:50.920
I couldn't handle it.

967
00:45:50.920 --> 00:45:51.720
So I quit.

968
00:45:51.720 --> 00:45:55.040
And I started working at a TV station
where a friend worked

969
00:45:55.040 --> 00:45:57.120
and eventually got a job as a reporter.

970
00:45:57.120 --> 00:45:58.400
And I thought, great.

971
00:45:58.400 --> 00:45:59.360
My dream job.

972
00:45:59.360 --> 00:46:01.400
Finally, I'll be happy.

973
00:46:01.520 --> 00:46:05.240
But still, suicidal thoughts
kept knocking on the door.

974
00:46:05.520 --> 00:46:07.320
and more than once I even wrote

975
00:46:07.320 --> 00:46:08.720
a goodbye note.

976
00:46:08.720 --> 00:46:10.600
And the only thing stopping me

977
00:46:10.600 --> 00:46:12.000
was the devastation

978
00:46:12.000 --> 00:46:13.600
that it would cause my family.

979
00:46:19.120 --> 00:46:22.920
Again, like Simon, I started taking anti-depressants

980
00:46:22.920 --> 00:46:24.280
and when it levelled me out

981
00:46:24.280 --> 00:46:25.600
I finally realised

982
00:46:25.600 --> 00:46:28.120
that I needed to stop trying to do things

983
00:46:28.120 --> 00:46:31.240
that I thought would make other people like me.

984
00:46:31.240 --> 00:46:33.600
So I quit my job again.

985
00:46:33.600 --> 00:46:35.320
I packed up my life.

986
00:46:35.320 --> 00:46:36.720
And I moved to London.

987
00:46:40.560 --> 00:46:44.080
And that's where I found the Steelers.

988
00:46:50.480 --> 00:46:52.600
NIC: As a team, we need more from you.

989
00:46:52.600 --> 00:46:56.080
OK? hold yourself to really high standards.

990
00:46:56.480 --> 00:46:58.080
EAMMON: So just two games left

991
00:46:58.080 --> 00:46:59.560
until the semi-finals.

992
00:46:59.680 --> 00:47:02.800
Next up, the Manchester Village Spartans.

993
00:47:04.200 --> 00:47:07.480
So these two teams share a rich history.

994
00:47:07.480 --> 00:47:11.000
In fact, in '98, three years after
the Steelers formed,

995
00:47:11.000 --> 00:47:12.840
the Spartans became the world's

996
00:47:12.840 --> 00:47:14.720
second gay rugby team.

997
00:47:15.040 --> 00:47:18.200
And a year on, they held a history
making rugby match

998
00:47:18.200 --> 00:47:20.120
between two gay teams.

999
00:47:20.640 --> 00:47:22.160
The world was slowly becoming more

1000
00:47:22.160 --> 00:47:23.720
accepting of gay people,

1001
00:47:23.720 --> 00:47:26.000
and these two clubs were doing their bit,

1002
00:47:26.000 --> 00:47:27.960
one game of rugby at a time.

1003
00:47:28.640 --> 00:47:30.040
And there were a few surprises.

1004
00:47:30.040 --> 00:47:32.920
First, it was a surprise to many of
the straight teams

1005
00:47:32.920 --> 00:47:35.960
that a gay team could
actually be quite good.

1006
00:47:41.800 --> 00:47:43.520
And second, it was a surprise,

1007
00:47:43.520 --> 00:47:45.160
well, at least to the Steelers,

1008
00:47:45.160 --> 00:47:47.280
that they didn't experience much,

1009
00:47:47.280 --> 00:47:50.080
if any, homophobia on the pitch.

1010
00:47:51.000 --> 00:47:54.440
So starting with London's
King's Cross Steelers,

1011
00:47:54.440 --> 00:47:55.720
with the Manchester Village Spartans

1012
00:47:55.720 --> 00:47:56.800
coming next ...

1013
00:47:56.800 --> 00:47:59.080
a movement was beginning.

1014
00:47:59.080 --> 00:48:01.640
Teams from around the world were forming.

1015
00:48:01.640 --> 00:48:02.760
From Washington

1016
00:48:02.760 --> 00:48:05.200
to Wellington, San Francisco.

1017
00:48:05.800 --> 00:48:07.560
And from those humble beginnings,

1018
00:48:07.560 --> 00:48:10.960
there are now 60 gay clubs around the world

1019
00:48:10.960 --> 00:48:13.200
with more than two thousand

1020
00:48:13.200 --> 00:48:14.680
queer rugby players.

1021
00:48:22.520 --> 00:48:25.960
And for me, this is what makes it so special.

1022
00:48:25.960 --> 00:48:28.120
Everyone here, every player

1023
00:48:28.120 --> 00:48:30.600
has gone through that same struggle

1024
00:48:30.600 --> 00:48:31.760
realising they're different

1025
00:48:31.760 --> 00:48:33.680
and coming to terms with it.

1026
00:48:39.240 --> 00:48:40.800
Take Matt, for example.

1027
00:48:40.800 --> 00:48:43.880
He's from a devout religious family in Ireland

1028
00:48:43.880 --> 00:48:46.720
and he was working on a missionary ship in Asia

1029
00:48:46.720 --> 00:48:48.640
and texting a guy who was helping him

1030
00:48:48.640 --> 00:48:51.600
come to terms with his sexuality

1031
00:48:51.600 --> 00:48:52.800
when he accidently messaged

1032
00:48:52.800 --> 00:48:54.800
the entire conversation

1033
00:48:54.800 --> 00:48:56.720
to his congregation.

1034
00:48:58.960 --> 00:49:01.000
They wanted him to go to counselling

1035
00:49:01.000 --> 00:49:04.640
and stand up in front
of the entire ship and confess.

1036
00:49:04.640 --> 00:49:06.880
But Matt refused.

1037
00:49:09.880 --> 00:49:11.400
And if being outed in this way

1038
00:49:11.400 --> 00:49:13.240
wasn't bad enough

1039
00:49:13.240 --> 00:49:15.800
they then kicked him off
the boat at the next port

1040
00:49:15.800 --> 00:49:17.720
without a cent to his name

1041
00:49:17.720 --> 00:49:20.600
alone, to find his own way home.

1042
00:49:27.120 --> 00:49:29.680
In this moment, on this pitch

1043
00:49:29.680 --> 00:49:32.240
to this team, he is nothing

1044
00:49:32.240 --> 00:49:33.680
but a champion.

1045
00:49:33.800 --> 00:49:36.200
And that's something that everyone

1046
00:49:36.200 --> 00:49:37.560
deserves to feel.

1047
00:50:12.360 --> 00:50:14.720
Final score, Steelers - 52

1048
00:50:14.720 --> 00:50:15.920
the Spartans nil.

1049
00:50:15.920 --> 00:50:18.000
So two wins, one loss

1050
00:50:18.000 --> 00:50:20.040
and only one game to go

1051
00:50:20.040 --> 00:50:21.640
until the knockouts.

1052
00:50:21.640 --> 00:50:22.960
MATT: I was trying to step

1053
00:50:22.960 --> 00:50:24.600
but my hamstring kept kind of tugging.

1054
00:50:24.600 --> 00:50:27.760
So I just just started pushing people

1055
00:50:27.760 --> 00:50:30.080
and it was like the slowest try ever.

1056
00:50:30.080 --> 00:50:31.440
But we got there.

1057
00:50:31.440 --> 00:50:33.160
NIC: Push out. Three seconds.

1058
00:50:33.160 --> 00:50:35.800
3, 2, 1.

1059
00:50:36.240 --> 00:50:38.240
SAM: Feeling really good ... it's um ...

1060
00:50:38.240 --> 00:50:40.200
the spirits definitely picked up.

1061
00:50:41.840 --> 00:50:44.040
It's nice to be back on a winning streak

1062
00:50:44.040 --> 00:50:45.080
after the first game.

1063
00:50:50.800 --> 00:50:52.120
Miles: So how many shots have
we got at this?

1064
00:50:53.600 --> 00:50:54.840
SAM: He's not a trained actor.

1065
00:50:55.200 --> 00:50:56.920
EAMMON: So now for a bit of downtime.

1066
00:50:56.920 --> 00:50:58.160
Take one.

1067
00:50:58.160 --> 00:50:59.120
MILES: You good to go?

1068
00:51:02.880 --> 00:51:04.680
- Hey Sam, you look like you've
been through the wars man.

1069
00:51:04.680 --> 00:51:06.960
- Yeah. I think I'm gonna be full mummy

1070
00:51:06.960 --> 00:51:08.200
by the end of tomorrow.

1071
00:51:08.800 --> 00:51:10.120
- One more?

1072
00:51:10.120 --> 00:51:11.120
- Do it again.

1073
00:51:13.160 --> 00:51:14.640
- I can't do this.

1074
00:51:22.160 --> 00:51:24.080
- You ever had a nice massage boy?!

1075
00:51:29.720 --> 00:51:31.360
MORGAN: I'm just gonna stretch, sorry.

1076
00:51:31.360 --> 00:51:31.880
- Guys, guys.

1077
00:51:32.640 --> 00:51:33.880
- No, bend and snap.

1078
00:51:34.680 --> 00:51:35.800
EAMMON: Take two.

1079
00:51:35.800 --> 00:51:37.640
- Hey Sam, you look like you've
been through the wars.

1080
00:51:37.640 --> 00:51:40.480
- Um, yeah. I think I'm
going to be a full mummy.

1081
00:51:43.320 --> 00:51:45.160
JONO: Miles always chatting shit, ay?

1082
00:51:50.640 --> 00:51:52.400
- Don't ever offend me again.

1083
00:51:55.280 --> 00:51:57.560
- Guys, you know you boy's filming here?

1084
00:51:58.280 --> 00:51:59.760
SIMON: Yeah that's why we're here.

1085
00:52:04.680 --> 00:52:06.200
- Oh you're happy now?

1086
00:52:11.960 --> 00:52:13.280
EAMMON: And ... take three.

1087
00:52:13.280 --> 00:52:14.520
- Hey Sam how are you feeling?

1088
00:52:14.520 --> 00:52:16.280
You look like you've been through the wars.

1089
00:52:16.280 --> 00:52:17.680
- Yeah. I think I'm going to be a full mummy

1090
00:52:17.680 --> 00:52:18.680
by the end of tomorrow.

1091
00:52:20.280 --> 00:52:20.800
- We good?

1092
00:52:20.800 --> 00:52:22.920
- So terrible! So terrible!

1093
00:52:22.920 --> 00:52:24.080
Sounds so staged.

1094
00:52:24.320 --> 00:52:25.640
EAMMON: Yeah.

1095
00:52:25.640 --> 00:52:28.000
So inside a little less acting,

1096
00:52:28.000 --> 00:52:29.680
a little more relaxing.

1097
00:52:30.560 --> 00:52:35.280
DREW: Sorry. Just trying to
zone out for a little while.

1098
00:52:35.280 --> 00:52:36.920
EAMMON: Feeling alright? How you feeling?

1099
00:52:36.920 --> 00:52:37.920
DREW: I'm feeling fine.

1100
00:52:38.240 --> 00:52:41.040
Just trying to, like, chill.

1101
00:52:41.040 --> 00:52:43.160
I know it's going to be a big boy game.

1102
00:52:43.160 --> 00:52:46.600
So my body will definitely hurt afterwards.

1103
00:52:47.280 --> 00:52:49.920
MORGAN: Yeah it will girl.
Yeah it will.

1104
00:52:51.800 --> 00:52:53.640
NIC: Feeling a bit nervous.

1105
00:52:54.280 --> 00:52:57.080
I think our backs are up
against the wall, really.

1106
00:52:57.080 --> 00:52:58.960
We've had quite a few injuries

1107
00:52:59.880 --> 00:53:02.760
and a few people are hanging on
by a hamstring.

1108
00:53:02.760 --> 00:53:03.960
I think their confidence

1109
00:53:03.960 --> 00:53:05.440
is a thin veil

1110
00:53:05.440 --> 00:53:08.600
under a lot of worrying

1111
00:53:08.600 --> 00:53:10.160
and lack of self belief.

1112
00:53:11.880 --> 00:53:14.280
EAMMON: The San Diego Armada next.

1113
00:53:14.280 --> 00:53:16.160
If we beat them, we'make it

1114
00:53:16.160 --> 00:53:17.360
to the semi-final.

1115
00:53:55.120 --> 00:53:56.920
Try after try,

1116
00:53:56.920 --> 00:53:59.360
the Steelers continue their winning streak.

1117
00:53:59.360 --> 00:54:01.120
So now after this match,

1118
00:54:01.120 --> 00:54:03.680
they're top four in the world.

1119
00:54:03.680 --> 00:54:05.760
Through to the semi-finals.

1120
00:54:13.920 --> 00:54:16.720
NIC: The reason why we got
to this position right now

1121
00:54:16.720 --> 00:54:18.320
is because you chose to take the game

1122
00:54:18.320 --> 00:54:19.200
to them.

1123
00:54:19.200 --> 00:54:21.000
You chose to play

1124
00:54:21.000 --> 00:54:22.000
our game.

1125
00:54:22.240 --> 00:54:24.000
EAMMON: And as fate would have it,

1126
00:54:24.000 --> 00:54:25.640
our opponent for the semi-final

1127
00:54:25.640 --> 00:54:27.520
is our biggest rival.

1128
00:54:27.520 --> 00:54:29.680
The team that beat us in the first game.

1129
00:54:29.680 --> 00:54:31.360
The Sydney Convicts.

1130
00:54:31.360 --> 00:54:32.560
SIMON: Personal apology from me

1131
00:54:32.560 --> 00:54:33.680
for being quite negative in the second half.

1132
00:54:33.680 --> 00:54:35.200
I'll sought it out for the next game.

1133
00:54:35.200 --> 00:54:36.600
DREW: proud of you all.

1134
00:54:36.600 --> 00:54:37.200
Keep going.

1135
00:54:37.960 --> 00:54:40.800
NIC: Now I'm asking you for more, OK?

1136
00:54:40.800 --> 00:54:42.680
I'm asking you for more. OK?

1137
00:54:42.680 --> 00:54:43.880
Play your game. OK?

1138
00:54:43.880 --> 00:54:45.080
Play our game.

1139
00:54:45.080 --> 00:54:46.080
Brilliant.

1140
00:54:50.040 --> 00:54:52.160
ROB: Get your hands in.
Get your hands in.

1141
00:54:54.280 --> 00:54:56.080
3, 2, 1, Steelers!

1142
00:54:56.080 --> 00:54:57.080
NIC: Yeah don't ask Jono.

1143
00:55:00.800 --> 00:55:02.680
SIMON D: Broke my shoe.

1144
00:55:03.560 --> 00:55:04.520
Looks like we're gonna

1145
00:55:04.520 --> 00:55:05.880
come up against Convicts again.

1146
00:55:06.200 --> 00:55:07.800
They only beat us 12-3

1147
00:55:07.800 --> 00:55:09.080
and I'm pretty sure they
only put a lot more points

1148
00:55:09.080 --> 00:55:10.080
on other people.

1149
00:55:11.080 --> 00:55:12.360
We know the game they're going to play.

1150
00:55:12.360 --> 00:55:13.280
It's going to be aggressive.

1151
00:55:13.280 --> 00:55:15.600
So we just need to be up ahead of that this time.

1152
00:55:18.240 --> 00:55:20.240
EAMMON: How exciting. Top 4!

1153
00:55:20.240 --> 00:55:23.880
CASPAR: Very exciting.
That was the goal we set ourselves.

1154
00:55:26.040 --> 00:55:27.280
I would say anything now

1155
00:55:27.280 --> 00:55:28.640
is just a cherry on top.

1156
00:55:28.640 --> 00:55:29.840
But we want more.

1157
00:55:30.240 --> 00:55:31.680
ROB: That is disgusting.

1158
00:55:31.680 --> 00:55:32.680
Don't film.

1159
00:55:33.640 --> 00:55:35.520
No one wants to see this!

1160
00:55:35.520 --> 00:55:37.120
MILES: Switch it off. Switch it off.

1161
00:55:37.120 --> 00:55:38.120
Switch it off.

1162
00:55:48.760 --> 00:55:49.760
DREW: It's a bit shit

1163
00:55:49.760 --> 00:55:51.640
we're playing against the Convicts again.

1164
00:55:51.640 --> 00:55:53.240
But I guess we have to play them again anyway.

1165
00:55:54.280 --> 00:55:56.760
I can see your religion.

1166
00:55:59.080 --> 00:56:00.760
STEVE: What have you got
against my waist?

1167
00:56:02.040 --> 00:56:04.080
SIMON: I'm fine. I was shouting
at the referees

1168
00:56:04.080 --> 00:56:05.280
and I said I wouldn't do that.

1169
00:56:06.240 --> 00:56:07.880
I was shouting at them bad.

1170
00:56:07.880 --> 00:56:09.880
I actually know that guy's sister.

1171
00:56:10.120 --> 00:56:12.160
And I met him just then

1172
00:56:12.160 --> 00:56:14.040
for the first time on the pitch.

1173
00:56:15.880 --> 00:56:17.480
That was supposed to be
my personal goal.

1174
00:56:18.120 --> 00:56:19.280
So not too good.

1175
00:56:19.280 --> 00:56:20.800
I'm going to try and find him

1176
00:56:20.800 --> 00:56:23.680
and apologise and start a blank sheet tomorrow.

1177
00:56:24.400 --> 00:56:25.640
EAMMON: Mate, you said you were

1178
00:56:25.640 --> 00:56:26.520
a bit down this morning

1179
00:56:26.520 --> 00:56:27.880
but I see that big smile.

1180
00:56:30.000 --> 00:56:31.480
JONO: He's a lot better
on camera than me.

1181
00:56:33.240 --> 00:56:35.160
- Yeah I was ... rugby helps, hey.

1182
00:56:35.720 --> 00:56:37.080
Yeah, no. I'm good.

1183
00:56:37.280 --> 00:56:40.080
SIMON: You know, one of the hardest ...

1184
00:56:40.080 --> 00:56:43.280
moments definitely in my life so far

1185
00:56:43.280 --> 00:56:46.880
was recovering myself from depression.

1186
00:56:46.880 --> 00:56:48.960
Feeling like myself again.

1187
00:56:48.960 --> 00:56:50.400
I remember probably just the moment

1188
00:56:50.400 --> 00:56:53.280
I was thinking, oh, I'm feeling myself again.

1189
00:56:53.760 --> 00:56:56.000
It was week. I think I had a week of that.

1190
00:56:56.000 --> 00:56:57.240
And then ...

1191
00:56:57.240 --> 00:57:00.120
I was actually doing counselling at the time

1192
00:57:00.120 --> 00:57:04.320
and I'd done my 15th out of 16 sessions

1193
00:57:04.320 --> 00:57:06.480
and we'd gone all the way through.

1194
00:57:06.480 --> 00:57:08.560
And I'd learnt so much about myself, you know.

1195
00:57:08.560 --> 00:57:10.600
And I just had to write a letter or something

1196
00:57:10.600 --> 00:57:12.200
to summarise this is what I've learnt.

1197
00:57:12.240 --> 00:57:14.720
And I was feeling like,
wrap it up and put it away.

1198
00:57:18.440 --> 00:57:20.560
Yeah, it was a sad week.

1199
00:57:21.720 --> 00:57:23.200
My dad was ...

1200
00:57:23.200 --> 00:57:24.360
became ill.

1201
00:57:24.560 --> 00:57:26.720
You know, he'd had a tumour in his bowel

1202
00:57:26.720 --> 00:57:30.280
for the best part of two years, they think.

1203
00:57:32.280 --> 00:57:34.840
He was in surgery on Monday

1204
00:57:34.840 --> 00:57:37.320
for about seven or eight hours,

1205
00:57:37.320 --> 00:57:38.840
and we were sat there.

1206
00:57:38.840 --> 00:57:40.160
And the weirdest thing, right.

1207
00:57:40.840 --> 00:57:43.720
My, my sister's heavily pregnant

1208
00:57:44.360 --> 00:57:45.320
and

1209
00:57:45.320 --> 00:57:47.600
oh she came over to try and see Dad

1210
00:57:47.600 --> 00:57:49.640
and see if he's out of his operation.

1211
00:57:49.640 --> 00:57:50.840
And she just whispered in my ear.

1212
00:57:50.840 --> 00:57:53.960
She said, "My waters have broken."

1213
00:57:54.160 --> 00:57:56.200
And I was like, what?

1214
00:57:56.200 --> 00:57:57.680
And she said "Yeah."

1215
00:57:57.680 --> 00:57:58.920
And I was like where?

1216
00:57:58.920 --> 00:58:00.440
She's like "No, no, it's calm."

1217
00:58:01.240 --> 00:58:03.000
"It is a trickle," she said.

1218
00:58:03.000 --> 00:58:04.960
Sorry for that. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

1219
00:58:04.960 --> 00:58:06.240
That's not good for film.

1220
00:58:08.040 --> 00:58:10.400
Her water broke while my dad
was in the operation.

1221
00:58:10.600 --> 00:58:12.400
Then my mum got in the lift.

1222
00:58:12.400 --> 00:58:15.080
I was doing my work in the corridor

1223
00:58:15.080 --> 00:58:19.040
and I got a message from my sister's partner

1224
00:58:19.040 --> 00:58:22.040
saying Isabelle Florence Wise Jones

1225
00:58:22.040 --> 00:58:23.760
has just been born.

1226
00:58:25.040 --> 00:58:27.160
I fucking threw the laptop down,

1227
00:58:27.640 --> 00:58:29.560
ran to the stairs,

1228
00:58:29.560 --> 00:58:31.720
ran down the stairs, and by the time

1229
00:58:31.720 --> 00:58:34.800
I got the two flights of stairs down

1230
00:58:34.800 --> 00:58:38.040
my mom was there in tears sobbing.

1231
00:58:38.520 --> 00:58:40.800
EAMMON: Simon's dad survived the surgery

1232
00:58:40.800 --> 00:58:43.040
and Simon flew straight here.

1233
00:58:43.800 --> 00:58:45.120
SIMON: Yeah, here we are.

1234
00:58:45.120 --> 00:58:46.320
It's kind of weird.

1235
00:58:46.320 --> 00:58:47.360
It's kind of weird, right?

1236
00:58:48.160 --> 00:58:49.760
They've seen how much this season

1237
00:58:49.760 --> 00:58:50.600
has meant to me.

1238
00:58:51.240 --> 00:58:53.600
So I think it would be nice to

1239
00:58:55.120 --> 00:58:57.320
take a picture on Sunday afternoon

1240
00:58:57.320 --> 00:58:58.760
and then send them

1241
00:58:58.760 --> 00:59:00.920
send them a picture of us with our ...

1242
00:59:00.920 --> 00:59:02.400
with our trophy

1243
00:59:03.080 --> 00:59:04.440
That would be cool.

1244
00:59:10.800 --> 00:59:11.960
SIMON: I want to kind of ...

1245
00:59:14.240 --> 00:59:15.600
I wanna win it, right?

1246
00:59:15.600 --> 00:59:17.880
I mean, we're not allowed to say that

1247
00:59:17.880 --> 00:59:19.360
because it's every game

1248
00:59:19.360 --> 00:59:19.960
it's every game.

1249
00:59:20.920 --> 00:59:23.160
But I want to win this rugby tournament.

1250
00:59:24.560 --> 00:59:25.560
And I want to contribute ...

1251
00:59:26.480 --> 00:59:28.040
I want to contribute to that.

1252
00:59:29.360 --> 00:59:30.960
I want ... I want to be

1253
00:59:30.960 --> 00:59:32.400
a big part of that.

1254
00:59:54.360 --> 00:59:55.960
EAMMON: I know that feeling.

1255
00:59:55.960 --> 00:59:57.400
Wanting to contribute.

1256
00:59:57.400 --> 01:00:00.000
Wanting to be a big part of something.

1257
01:00:00.560 --> 01:00:02.320
Wanting to belong.

1258
01:00:15.360 --> 01:00:17.920
EAMMON: I remember my first training
session with the Steelers.

1259
01:00:17.920 --> 01:00:20.040
I was overweight and unfit.

1260
01:00:20.040 --> 01:00:22.640
And we warmed up running around the oval

1261
01:00:22.640 --> 01:00:24.360
and I was about a lap behind everyone.

1262
01:00:24.800 --> 01:00:26.280
I didn't want to give up, though

1263
01:00:26.280 --> 01:00:28.960
to embarrass myself in front of everyone.

1264
01:00:28.960 --> 01:00:30.800
And as I was coming around

1265
01:00:30.800 --> 01:00:33.400
finishing the last lap, the whole club

1266
01:00:33.400 --> 01:00:35.440
was standing there clapping,

1267
01:00:35.440 --> 01:00:36.600
cheering me on.

1268
01:00:36.880 --> 01:00:38.360
Something like that

1269
01:00:38.360 --> 01:00:40.520
had never happened to me before.

1270
01:00:40.520 --> 01:00:41.920
And I remember my first game.

1271
01:00:41.920 --> 01:00:43.640
I was so nervous.

1272
01:00:43.640 --> 01:00:45.440
But it all started coming back to me

1273
01:00:45.440 --> 01:00:46.920
from when I was 12.

1274
01:00:46.920 --> 01:00:48.440
I broke through and I scored

1275
01:00:48.440 --> 01:00:49.880
the most tries of the match.

1276
01:00:49.880 --> 01:00:51.400
And afterward at the pub

1277
01:00:51.400 --> 01:00:53.240
people were patting me on the back

1278
01:00:53.240 --> 01:00:55.560
coming up to me, congratulating me,

1279
01:00:55.560 --> 01:00:57.080
wanting to get to know me.

1280
01:00:57.080 --> 01:00:59.160
And I remember thinking

1281
01:00:59.160 --> 01:01:00.640
this was one of the best days

1282
01:01:00.640 --> 01:01:02.320
of my life.

1283
01:01:13.280 --> 01:01:14.200
EAMMON: Day three.

1284
01:01:14.200 --> 01:01:18.520
Up next, the semi-final
against the Sydney Convicts.

1285
01:01:18.520 --> 01:01:21.360
MATT: So annoying because
they got that wee skinny winger.

1286
01:01:22.360 --> 01:01:23.640
CHRIS: How are the wingers?

1287
01:01:23.640 --> 01:01:26.400
- He does not look 40, but he's 40.

1288
01:01:27.240 --> 01:01:30.960
and he's just really lanky and skinny.

1289
01:01:30.960 --> 01:01:31.960
DREW: I think he's like the first

1290
01:01:31.960 --> 01:01:33.720
daddy twink I've ever met.

1291
01:01:33.720 --> 01:01:36.080
- No, I mean, he's like the
definition of a twink as well.

1292
01:01:36.080 --> 01:01:36.760
But he's 40.

1293
01:01:36.760 --> 01:01:37.560
- Daddy.

1294
01:01:37.560 --> 01:01:38.560
- Yeah, it's crazy.

1295
01:01:39.680 --> 01:01:41.000
- A twink daddy?

1296
01:01:41.000 --> 01:01:43.520
- Twonk? He's not a Twonk.

1297
01:01:43.520 --> 01:01:44.320
- Twatty?

1298
01:01:44.320 --> 01:01:46.120
ALL: He's a Twitty!

1299
01:01:49.640 --> 01:01:50.880
- Might want to throw up.

1300
01:01:50.880 --> 01:01:52.040
- Oh, really?

1301
01:01:53.120 --> 01:01:54.040
- Couldn't eat.

1302
01:01:54.880 --> 01:01:56.560
I had to like force down my banana.

1303
01:01:56.560 --> 01:01:58.040
- Did you sleep okay?

1304
01:01:58.040 --> 01:01:59.040
- Somewhat.

1305
01:01:59.040 --> 01:02:01.720
- All my thoughts, all my dreams

1306
01:02:01.720 --> 01:02:05.320
were all rugby, specifically this game.

1307
01:02:06.720 --> 01:02:07.880
But it's good. It's good.

1308
01:02:10.680 --> 01:02:12.440
- I had a dream that one of them

1309
01:02:12.440 --> 01:02:14.800
booted me in in the head

1310
01:02:14.800 --> 01:02:16.640
and then I just went feral.

1311
01:02:16.800 --> 01:02:18.080
- All my dreams were related to

1312
01:02:18.080 --> 01:02:19.920
fighting people as well.

1313
01:02:22.960 --> 01:02:24.800
EAMMON: So if you go by points,

1314
01:02:24.800 --> 01:02:27.120
these two teams are the strongest

1315
01:02:27.120 --> 01:02:28.040
in the tournament.

1316
01:02:28.040 --> 01:02:30.240
And it's unfortunate that they're meeting again

1317
01:02:30.240 --> 01:02:31.680
in the semi-finals.

1318
01:02:31.680 --> 01:02:34.360
Whoever wins this will surely go on

1319
01:02:34.360 --> 01:02:36.320
to win the entire competition.

1320
01:02:37.200 --> 01:02:40.040
DREW: Kind of our time to redeem ourselves

1321
01:02:40.040 --> 01:02:42.960
and show them that we can actually beat them.

1322
01:02:42.960 --> 01:02:44.000
It's a beatable game.

1323
01:02:44.760 --> 01:02:46.600
EAMMON: what would that mean to you?

1324
01:02:47.320 --> 01:02:49.400
DREW: Mean fucking the world to me.

1325
01:02:50.240 --> 01:02:52.880
World to everybody actually, all of us.

1326
01:02:55.560 --> 01:02:56.960
EAMMON: And how are you feeling
about yourself?

1327
01:03:09.560 --> 01:03:11.640
SIMON: I don't at this moment.
I don't know, mate.

1328
01:03:12.440 --> 01:03:13.800
You know when you're unsure?

1329
01:03:13.800 --> 01:03:15.400
I'll let you know after the game.

1330
01:03:17.600 --> 01:03:19.920
We are in... we are in with a shot.

1331
01:03:19.920 --> 01:03:20.920
A good shot.

1332
01:03:22.800 --> 01:03:24.040
EAMMON: How are the kind of nerves

1333
01:03:24.040 --> 01:03:27.120
because you spoke about
how you get very nervous.

1334
01:03:27.440 --> 01:03:30.560
NIC: Not bad yet it's always
just 10 minutes beforehand.

1335
01:03:31.720 --> 01:03:33.520
I feel calm. Feeling relaxed.

1336
01:03:34.600 --> 01:03:36.080
I'm really excited.

1337
01:03:36.080 --> 01:03:37.520
I'm genuinely excited.

1338
01:03:37.520 --> 01:03:40.680
I think for me, the bigger the game the better.

1339
01:03:53.360 --> 01:03:55.240
NIC: In some ways, I felt like

1340
01:03:56.000 --> 01:03:57.800
maybe Steelers would have been

1341
01:03:57.800 --> 01:03:59.400
one of the only clubs

1342
01:04:00.960 --> 01:04:02.520
to have given me the opportunity

1343
01:04:02.520 --> 01:04:04.480
to be Director of Rugby.

1344
01:04:04.920 --> 01:04:05.480
So

1345
01:04:06.760 --> 01:04:07.840
and I'm really sad

1346
01:04:07.840 --> 01:04:08.840
that that's the case.

1347
01:04:08.840 --> 01:04:10.920
And I'm really sad that even now,

1348
01:04:10.920 --> 01:04:13.520
we went to Elford Wanderers
in the Cup final in Essex

1349
01:04:15.120 --> 01:04:18.960
and one of the dignitaries from the league

1350
01:04:18.960 --> 01:04:20.960
went straight up to Alex and spoke to Alex.

1351
01:04:20.960 --> 01:04:22.600
And I was like, actually this is our

1352
01:04:22.600 --> 01:04:23.600
Director of Rugby.

1353
01:04:23.600 --> 01:04:25.600
So I feel like I'm still needed to be

1354
01:04:25.600 --> 01:04:27.000
validated by men.

1355
01:04:30.120 --> 01:04:31.200
I've been the physio.

1356
01:04:31.200 --> 01:04:32.360
I've been the water girl.

1357
01:04:34.160 --> 01:04:37.880
The referee often doesn't recognise me

1358
01:04:37.880 --> 01:04:39.600
so will go straight to Alex

1359
01:04:39.600 --> 01:04:41.720
because obviously he's in charge.

1360
01:04:42.000 --> 01:04:42.720
So

1361
01:04:43.560 --> 01:04:45.760
I feel those daily struggles.

1362
01:04:46.120 --> 01:04:47.600
And I don't think the players see it

1363
01:04:47.600 --> 01:04:50.360
because they've gone past
seeing me as a female

1364
01:04:50.360 --> 01:04:52.160
and they just see me as the coach.

1365
01:04:52.640 --> 01:04:53.640
So for them

1366
01:04:54.520 --> 01:04:57.120
my gender is invisible to them.

1367
01:04:57.440 --> 01:04:59.200
I'm just Nic.

1368
01:05:00.040 --> 01:05:02.200
But for me, it's always ...

1369
01:05:02.200 --> 01:05:04.920
it's always sitting there with me.

1370
01:05:04.920 --> 01:05:06.640
So I always feel judged.

1371
01:05:06.640 --> 01:05:08.600
I always feel that

1372
01:05:08.600 --> 01:05:11.240
I have to do a better job than other people

1373
01:05:11.240 --> 01:05:12.800
to be able to say

1374
01:05:13.560 --> 01:05:15.320
I'm okay as a coach.

1375
01:05:19.160 --> 01:05:22.960
ALEX: So starting 15
for the semi-final

1376
01:05:22.960 --> 01:05:24.880
against the Sydney Convicts is

1377
01:05:25.400 --> 01:05:27.320
Drew McDowell at lose head.

1378
01:05:29.520 --> 01:05:31.640
NIC: I don't think results

1379
01:05:31.640 --> 01:05:33.480
validate who I am

1380
01:05:33.680 --> 01:05:36.320
I think the relationship I have

1381
01:05:36.320 --> 01:05:39.120
with majority of the players

1382
01:05:39.120 --> 01:05:40.720
in the whole club

1383
01:05:40.720 --> 01:05:42.720
validates who I am as a coach.

1384
01:05:43.520 --> 01:05:45.840
I feel like I'm appreciated as a coach

1385
01:05:45.840 --> 01:05:47.000
throughout the club

1386
01:05:47.000 --> 01:05:48.920
not just in the first team.

1387
01:05:50.120 --> 01:05:51.720
But I want that to happen

1388
01:05:51.720 --> 01:05:52.960
in the outside world.

1389
01:05:52.960 --> 01:05:53.840
So

1390
01:05:54.520 --> 01:05:56.520
I think if

1391
01:05:56.520 --> 01:05:59.240
if we won the Bingham Cup

1392
01:06:00.760 --> 01:06:02.800
I could go home

1393
01:06:02.800 --> 01:06:04.040
and I could say

1394
01:06:04.040 --> 01:06:05.280
that I have the best ...

1395
01:06:05.280 --> 01:06:07.760
I have coached the best gay team

1396
01:06:07.760 --> 01:06:08.760
in the world.

1397
01:06:10.080 --> 01:06:11.720
And I think

1398
01:06:12.120 --> 01:06:14.320
yeah, I'd feel pretty proud of that.

1399
01:06:15.360 --> 01:06:16.640
EAMMON: that's beautiful.

1400
01:06:43.960 --> 01:06:47.320
NIC: Aggression. Brutality.
Communication.

1401
01:06:47.800 --> 01:06:49.280
Give me A, B, C.

1402
01:06:49.280 --> 01:06:50.920
That's all I want from you

1403
01:06:50.920 --> 01:06:51.880
for 40 minutes.

1404
01:06:52.160 --> 01:06:53.680
ABC. Aggression.

1405
01:06:53.680 --> 01:06:55.360
Brutality at the contact.

1406
01:06:55.360 --> 01:06:57.280
Communication with each other.

1407
01:06:57.520 --> 01:06:59.840
You can focus on that
as you walk down.

1408
01:06:59.840 --> 01:07:01.000
Those three things.

1409
01:07:01.000 --> 01:07:02.800
Nothing changes here.

1410
01:07:03.240 --> 01:07:04.960
PLAYER: This is what it feels like!

1411
01:07:05.440 --> 01:07:06.920
This is what it smells like!

1412
01:07:08.600 --> 01:07:09.840
Here we go Steelers!

1413
01:07:13.160 --> 01:07:16.160
This is our game!
This is our tournament!

1414
01:07:32.280 --> 01:07:34.160
PLAYER: We have made promises
to ourselves!

1415
01:07:34.160 --> 01:07:36.360
We have made promises to each other!

1416
01:07:36.360 --> 01:07:38.960
And today we fucking deliver
on those promises!

1417
01:08:09.040 --> 01:08:11.320
EAMMON: Here we are.
Face to face

1418
01:08:11.320 --> 01:08:13.080
with our toughest competition.

1419
01:08:13.080 --> 01:08:15.880
The biggest thing standing between us

1420
01:08:15.880 --> 01:08:17.760
and the Bingham Cup.

1421
01:08:21.320 --> 01:08:23.080
It's another brutal game.

1422
01:08:24.720 --> 01:08:26.040
But we push them back.

1423
01:08:26.040 --> 01:08:28.600
And then the ball goes loose
over our try line.

1424
01:08:28.880 --> 01:08:29.880
The Convicts pick it up.

1425
01:08:29.880 --> 01:08:32.000
But we rip it from them

1426
01:08:32.000 --> 01:08:33.400
and score the first try.

1427
01:08:43.840 --> 01:08:45.600
The Convicts fight back.

1428
01:08:45.920 --> 01:08:46.960
But we stumble.

1429
01:08:46.960 --> 01:08:49.920
And you can see just how much this means

1430
01:08:49.920 --> 01:08:52.400
to each and every one of us.

1431
01:08:57.680 --> 01:09:00.760
Half time comes
and we manage to hold the lead.

1432
01:09:00.760 --> 01:09:01.760
CAPTAIN: Keep that in your head.

1433
01:09:01.760 --> 01:09:03.320
Do not think this is done.

1434
01:09:03.320 --> 01:09:04.680
PLAYER: We are getting tired now.

1435
01:09:04.680 --> 01:09:05.800
ALEX: Blast them away.

1436
01:09:05.800 --> 01:09:07.040
There is more to come.

1437
01:09:07.040 --> 01:09:08.520
More to come for you guys

1438
01:09:08.520 --> 01:09:09.520
in the next 20 minutes.

1439
01:09:09.640 --> 01:09:11.560
ALL: 3, 2, 1, Steelers!

1440
01:09:22.040 --> 01:09:23.560
EAMMON: The Convicts score.

1441
01:09:31.520 --> 01:09:33.640
And they score again.

1442
01:09:41.240 --> 01:09:43.240
Our boys play their hearts out.

1443
01:09:45.680 --> 01:09:47.320
But it's not enough.

1444
01:09:47.600 --> 01:09:48.600
Full time.

1445
01:09:48.600 --> 01:09:50.320
And the Kings Cross Steelers

1446
01:09:50.320 --> 01:09:53.360
are knocked out of the Bingham Cup.

1447
01:10:51.760 --> 01:10:53.000
EAMMON: are you proud
of what you've done

1448
01:10:53.000 --> 01:10:54.040
for the club?

1449
01:10:56.000 --> 01:10:56.880
NIC: No.

1450
01:10:56.880 --> 01:10:57.880
I think

1451
01:10:59.000 --> 01:11:00.320
I would have liked to have given them

1452
01:11:00.320 --> 01:11:03.280
the Binghma Cup as the final hurrah.

1453
01:11:04.680 --> 01:11:05.960
They deserved that.

1454
01:11:06.800 --> 01:11:08.520
The boys deserved that

1455
01:11:08.520 --> 01:11:10.400
the amount of work they put in.

1456
01:11:11.880 --> 01:11:13.640
And you know, I feel

1457
01:11:13.640 --> 01:11:15.480
really connected to the boys

1458
01:11:15.480 --> 01:11:17.240
to the team, to the squad

1459
01:11:18.760 --> 01:11:20.040
as individuals.

1460
01:11:20.040 --> 01:11:21.880
And I felt

1461
01:11:21.880 --> 01:11:23.240
that they deserved that place

1462
01:11:23.240 --> 01:11:24.480
in that final.

1463
01:11:25.280 --> 01:11:27.320
And in terms of their ability

1464
01:11:27.320 --> 01:11:28.720
they were in that game.

1465
01:11:28.720 --> 01:11:30.320
That game was for winning.

1466
01:11:33.440 --> 01:11:34.440
PLAYER: The game is done.

1467
01:11:34.800 --> 01:11:36.200
There is nothing that we can do

1468
01:11:36.200 --> 01:11:37.320
to fix anything.

1469
01:11:37.320 --> 01:11:39.840
So now is not the time for recriminations.

1470
01:11:39.840 --> 01:11:40.960
What the moment is now

1471
01:11:40.960 --> 01:11:43.120
is for the fucking pride we should take

1472
01:11:43.120 --> 01:11:44.600
in the performance that we put in.

1473
01:11:44.600 --> 01:11:46.960
Not just today, but on the first day

1474
01:11:46.960 --> 01:11:47.960
and on the second day.

1475
01:11:47.960 --> 01:11:50.120
And for the whole of the fucking season.

1476
01:11:50.120 --> 01:11:51.400
The work rate

1477
01:11:51.400 --> 01:11:53.720
the effort you boys put in for me today

1478
01:11:53.720 --> 01:11:55.120
was fucking outstanding.

1479
01:11:55.120 --> 01:11:57.080
You hold your heads high.

1480
01:11:57.080 --> 01:11:58.800
You can have your fucking cry

1481
01:11:58.800 --> 01:12:00.480
when you have your cry.

1482
01:12:00.480 --> 01:12:02.200
But for the next fucking day,

1483
01:12:02.200 --> 01:12:03.720
I want your heads held high.

1484
01:12:03.720 --> 01:12:05.520
Be proud of the good things

1485
01:12:05.520 --> 01:12:07.560
that you've done on this tour.

1486
01:12:07.560 --> 01:12:09.840
You remember those fucking good things.

1487
01:12:12.880 --> 01:12:14.800
We said we'd slap each other on the back

1488
01:12:14.800 --> 01:12:16.840
for the good things that we've done.

1489
01:12:16.840 --> 01:12:18.520
Make sure you go to somebody,

1490
01:12:18.520 --> 01:12:20.000
anybody and say

1491
01:12:20.000 --> 01:12:21.880
one fucking good thing, guys.

1492
01:12:32.840 --> 01:12:34.440
SIMON: I definitely did myself proud

1493
01:12:34.440 --> 01:12:35.800
and also I'll learn from some of the things

1494
01:12:35.800 --> 01:12:37.560
that I could do better.

1495
01:12:37.560 --> 01:12:38.520
So it's great.

1496
01:12:38.520 --> 01:12:39.360
And I'm going home and my dad's

1497
01:12:39.360 --> 01:12:40.920
going to be at the hospital
in a couple of days

1498
01:12:40.920 --> 01:12:42.240
and my sister's got a baby.

1499
01:12:42.240 --> 01:12:43.920
And we got to the semi-final

1500
01:12:43.920 --> 01:12:45.240
of the Bingham Cup.

1501
01:12:46.520 --> 01:12:48.160
Finish with that yeah?

1502
01:13:07.680 --> 01:13:09.920
EAMMON: You did the club proud, mate.

1503
01:13:09.920 --> 01:13:11.560
You had an undefeated season

1504
01:13:11.560 --> 01:13:13.960
and you're top four in Bingham.

1505
01:13:13.960 --> 01:13:15.320
I think you did the club

1506
01:13:15.320 --> 01:13:16.720
bloody proud.

1507
01:13:16.720 --> 01:13:19.360
ROB: Yeah. I hope this year goes down

1508
01:13:19.360 --> 01:13:20.360
in a bit of Steelers history.

1509
01:13:21.840 --> 01:13:24.160
NIC: I think it's really selfish

1510
01:13:24.160 --> 01:13:27.120
because for me it's my ending.

1511
01:13:27.120 --> 01:13:31.040
And I wanted that fairy tale princess ending.

1512
01:13:32.160 --> 01:13:33.120
EAMMON: It's a bit selfish, too,

1513
01:13:33.120 --> 01:13:34.880
because I wanted that same

1514
01:13:34.880 --> 01:13:37.880
fairy tale ending for this documentary.

1515
01:13:37.880 --> 01:13:40.280
I wanted it to be our boys on that podium.

1516
01:13:41.920 --> 01:13:43.400
But actually, if you think about it

1517
01:13:43.400 --> 01:13:44.880
that's not how life goes.

1518
01:13:44.880 --> 01:13:46.680
More often than not, it doesn't turn out

1519
01:13:46.680 --> 01:13:48.080
how you want.

1520
01:13:48.080 --> 01:13:50.560
But that's where the opportunity lies.

1521
01:13:55.160 --> 01:13:56.920
Three weeks ago, I got a concussion

1522
01:13:56.920 --> 01:13:58.240
that ruled me out from playing

1523
01:13:58.240 --> 01:13:59.600
in this competition

1524
01:13:59.600 --> 01:14:01.120
and I was devastated.

1525
01:14:01.120 --> 01:14:02.480
But then I never would have

1526
01:14:02.480 --> 01:14:04.000
picked up this camera

1527
01:14:04.000 --> 01:14:05.760
filmed from the sidelines

1528
01:14:05.760 --> 01:14:07.440
and this story would have never been told.

1529
01:14:07.680 --> 01:14:09.480
If I didn't get bullied as a kid,

1530
01:14:09.480 --> 01:14:10.920
well, maybe I wouldn't have

1531
01:14:10.920 --> 01:14:12.640
a fighting spirit.

1532
01:14:12.640 --> 01:14:14.000
If I didn't pick up that rugby ball

1533
01:14:14.000 --> 01:14:15.760
when I was 12 years old

1534
01:14:15.760 --> 01:14:17.720
even though I hated sport

1535
01:14:17.720 --> 01:14:18.840
well, then I never would have

1536
01:14:18.840 --> 01:14:19.800
joined the Steelers.

1537
01:14:19.800 --> 01:14:22.040
I wouldn't have met my
incredible husband, John,

1538
01:14:22.040 --> 01:14:23.360
and got married.

1539
01:14:23.360 --> 01:14:24.480
Something I never thought

1540
01:14:24.480 --> 01:14:26.040
would happen to me.

1541
01:14:27.360 --> 01:14:30.080
And if that very first gay rugby team

1542
01:14:30.080 --> 01:14:32.120
25 years ago simply gave up

1543
01:14:32.120 --> 01:14:34.360
when the majority of straight teams

1544
01:14:34.360 --> 01:14:35.920
refused to play them ...

1545
01:14:35.920 --> 01:14:37.520
then who knows how many

1546
01:14:37.520 --> 01:14:40.160
thousands of gay lives would be less rich

1547
01:14:40.160 --> 01:14:41.600
because of it?

1548
01:14:41.920 --> 01:14:44.280
NIC: I hope that some of them

1549
01:14:44.280 --> 01:14:46.200
will feel that I have

1550
01:14:46.200 --> 01:14:47.800
changed them as a coach.

1551
01:14:48.800 --> 01:14:50.160
That I've moved them on

1552
01:14:50.160 --> 01:14:51.880
and some of them maybe that's a nudge.

1553
01:14:52.120 --> 01:14:54.280
Some of them maybe they feel like

1554
01:14:54.280 --> 01:14:55.600
that's big steps.

1555
01:14:55.600 --> 01:14:57.280
But I hope

1556
01:14:57.600 --> 01:15:00.160
that the majority of my players feel that

1557
01:15:00.160 --> 01:15:01.800
I've made them

1558
01:15:01.800 --> 01:15:03.000
a better person.

1559
01:15:07.760 --> 01:15:10.400
DREW: I don't fit in any one cup or mold.

1560
01:15:10.400 --> 01:15:12.920
To me, that's just a B.S.

1561
01:15:12.920 --> 01:15:14.080
kind of attitude to have

1562
01:15:14.080 --> 01:15:16.520
that we as gay men have to

1563
01:15:16.520 --> 01:15:18.880
fit this kind of category

1564
01:15:18.880 --> 01:15:20.720
this mold that

1565
01:15:20.720 --> 01:15:22.840
if you're a bear you have to be

1566
01:15:22.840 --> 01:15:24.720
big and brawny and blah, blah, blah.

1567
01:15:24.720 --> 01:15:25.960
If you're a twink, you have to be

1568
01:15:25.960 --> 01:15:27.200
really flamboyant.

1569
01:15:27.200 --> 01:15:28.400
Whoever you are,

1570
01:15:28.400 --> 01:15:29.880
whatever type of person you are,

1571
01:15:29.880 --> 01:15:31.400
that's you.

1572
01:15:31.400 --> 01:15:33.760
That's being your authentic self.

1573
01:15:34.400 --> 01:15:36.920
SIMON: I'll never forget
this rugby season.

1574
01:15:36.920 --> 01:15:38.120
And just when I was about to

1575
01:15:38.120 --> 01:15:39.680
walk away from rugby

1576
01:15:40.080 --> 01:15:41.440
but something told me

1577
01:15:41.440 --> 01:15:43.440
no, rugby can still help you.

1578
01:15:43.680 --> 01:15:46.240
Then the club, and this season

1579
01:15:49.040 --> 01:15:49.840
saved my life ...

1580
01:15:49.840 --> 01:15:51.840
probably saved my life.

1581
01:15:52.640 --> 01:15:53.800
And that's not ...

1582
01:15:53.960 --> 01:15:55.280
I don't say that ...

1583
01:15:57.480 --> 01:15:59.920
without careful thought.

1584
01:16:09.720 --> 01:16:10.720
EAMMON: So for me

1585
01:16:10.720 --> 01:16:12.920
this isn't a coming out story

1586
01:16:12.920 --> 01:16:15.400
or a story about winning a tournament

1587
01:16:15.400 --> 01:16:17.640
or even about being gay.

1588
01:16:17.640 --> 01:16:19.360
It's a story about

1589
01:16:19.360 --> 01:16:21.760
searching for where you belong

1590
01:16:21.760 --> 01:16:23.680
and never giving up

1591
01:16:23.680 --> 01:16:26.000
because you just might find happiness

1592
01:16:26.000 --> 01:16:28.400
where you least expect.