WEBVTT FILE

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Downloaded from
YTS.MX

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[dramatic music playing]

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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

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[birds chirping]

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[Nathan] <i>I'm Nathan. I'm 13.</i>

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<i>I live in Denver, Colorado
with my mom.</i>

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<i>When I get home,
I'll go longboard,</i>

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<i>maybe Skype a friend
or go outside,</i>

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<i>play with the neighbors.</i>

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I don't know how old I was
when I figured out

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that I was conceived
with donor sperm though.

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<i>Most of my friends</i>

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<i>come from a pretty
normal family.</i>

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<i>I tried to look
for the donor, but...</i>

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[man speaking]

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No.

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<i>When I was first contacted
by other siblings,</i>

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<i>I remember that I was talking</i>

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<i>to friends on Facebook</i>

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<i>and I got a message saying,</i>

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<i>you know, "Are you Nathan?
Do you live in Denver?"</i>

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<i>I said "Yes."</i>

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And that's how I met them.

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[dramatic music playing]

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[woman] <i>This is the audio tape</i>

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<i>of donor 5114.</i>

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<i>Today's date
is October 23rd, 1996.</i>

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[man]<i> Hello,</i>
<i>my donor number is 5114.</i>

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<i>I am six feet one inch tall.</i>

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<i>I have medium build,
straight brown hair,</i>

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<i>and brown eyes.</i>

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<i>I have full lips,</i>

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<i>and my racial color code
as established</i>

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<i>by the California Cryobank
is white.</i>

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[woman]<i> Can you give me</i>
<i>one or two adjectives</i>

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<i>that best describe you?</i>

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[man]<i> I would say</i>
<i>optimistic and curious.</i>

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[woman] <i>Do you have any hobbies?</i>

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[man]<i> Any hobbies, yes.</i>

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<i>I like fly fishing and running,</i>

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<i>reading,
and traveling especially.</i>

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[woman]<i> Do you have anything</i>
<i>that you would like to say</i>

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<i>to the recipient of your sperm</i>

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<i>or a child born from your sperm?</i>

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[man]<i> Yes.</i>
<i>I wish them all the luck.</i>

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[dramatic music playing]

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[woman]<i> This is, like,</i>
<i>one of the three pictures</i>

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<i>I have of me and you together.</i>

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No, it's... You're not
in anything in here,

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this is all before...
B.N., Before Nathan.

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That's the first...
That's Hawaii,

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that's...
You were seven weeks old.

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<i>People thought I was crazy.</i>

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<i>"They said "What'd you do,
just give birth</i>

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<i>and get on a plane?"</i> [chuckles]

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I think I knew from the time
I was seven years old

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that basically
what I wanted to be

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when I grow up was a mommy,

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<i>and it just ended up</i>

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<i>that I was single
for most of my life</i>

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and so I decided to do

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a donor insemination.

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I never considered
an extended family.

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<i>I never really...
Even the thought of siblings</i>

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<i>didn't really enter my mind.</i>

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You're so excited about the fact

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that you're starting
this journey

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with having a baby.
You don't think of,

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you know, you got...

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You don't think about
the wider picture.

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Everyone thought
you were gonna be like

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a nine-pound baby

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and you were six pounds,
thirteen ounces.

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You were microscopic.

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[Nathan]<i> When my half-siblings</i>
<i>first contacted me,</i>

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I remember being happy
that I had half-siblings

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<i>but a little frustrated
with my mom</i>

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because she had known
about some of them

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and she hadn't told me before.

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Well, I had told my mom
about this

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and she didn't think

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it would be a good idea
to tell Nathan.

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<i>She believed that
he had a family</i>

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<i>and he didn't need
any other family.</i>

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<i>Then I thought, well, you know,</i>

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<i>when he's older,
if he ever wants to know,</i>

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if he ever puts it together
in his head that,

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you know, there might be,

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I just thought
I'd let him kind of...

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And I left it alone.

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I never really thought that

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I would come in contact
with my siblings

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but I knew that
there was a chance

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that there were, out there.

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<i>Me and the other siblings
always get on Skype,</i>

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<i>talk to each other online</i>

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<i>after we all get home
from school.</i>

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<i>I feel like
I've already known them</i>

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for longer than I have

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even though I might know
that much about them.

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<i>Being online having social media</i>

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<i>really helps us stay connected</i>

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because so far,

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it's the only contact we have

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between each other.

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[woman]<i> He's been on Skype</i>
<i>with these siblings</i>

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since the day he met them

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<i>and tomorrow
we are getting on a plane</i>

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<i>and we are flying to Taos</i>

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<i>and he is going to meet
five of his half-siblings.</i>

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[dramatic music playing]

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- [Nathan] Hi.
- [Zeke] Hi.

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[woman] You must be Zeke.

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[Zeke] My name is Zeke.

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- [man] Yeah.
- [man] Do you have a...

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- [woman] Hi.
- [Nick] Hey.

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Hello.

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[indistinct chatter]

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- [woman] Let's go.
- [girl] Let's go.

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- Hi.
- [Nathan] Hi.

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[Alexis] Hi, Nate.

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- [Nathan] Hi.
- Okay.

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[dramatic music playing]

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[indistinct chatter]

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[Alexis] Ten hours.

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[indistinct chatter]

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[man speaking]

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[Danny] Oh, yeah.

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[Alexis] Danny,
I brought you a flower.

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[indistinct chatter]

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So where did you come from?

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[indistinct chatter]

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[Danny] Oh we got a tarantula.

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[man] Yeah, where
is the tarantula anyway?

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[indistinct chatter]

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[woman]
It's kind of overwhelming.

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It's... There's a lot of people

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and a lot of children
and I had talked

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<i>to a couple of people outside</i>

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when I first got here
and everyone's so friendly

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and nice and it's just exciting.

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[Neylan] Oh, I have
a present for you.

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Oh, cool.

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A bracelet.

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- Yeah, it's pretty.
- [man speaking]

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Yeah. We're sisters, you know?

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They all say "sisters forever."

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Yeah. We're all girls here.

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- Right, Danny?
- [Zeke] What?

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[Danny] What? No, yes.

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[man] <i>So when you guys got here,</i>

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<i>you guys got here last night.</i>

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Like,
what did you guys do today?

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- Waiting for Nathan.
- Yeah. He never came.

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[Danny] On Skype, he told me
that he'd be here

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by, like, 5:00 in the morning

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so we were all up till like
5:00 in the morning,

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- waiting for him.
- Yeah.

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- And then...
- We slept on the balcony.

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And then it turned out
that he left at 5:00

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in the morning.
I was like, "wow."

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[man speaking]

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[Nick]<i> At first,</i>
<i>I was really nervous.</i>

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<i>I didn't know what to say
because I feel like</i>

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<i>we're brothers and sisters but,</i>

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like, we've never met before.

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So I didn't really know
what to say.

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My name is Nick.

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May name is Danny.

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My name is Alexis.

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My name is Neylan.

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My name is Zeke.

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[Nick] I've noticed that
we all have full lips.

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[Alexis]<i> Yeah.</i>
<i>And dark eyebrows.</i>

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[Neylan]
<i>And bushy eyebrows, yeah.</i>

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[Alexis]<i> Some of us have,</i>
<i>like, kind of wide-ish noses</i>

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like we do
and he does kind of...

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And we all play soccer.

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- Yeah.
- Right?

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Do most of us do track?

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I do track, yeah.

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It's my favorite sport, so.

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[Nick] Today, like,
we kind of like...

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We got to know each other
well today I think.

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- [Neylan] Yeah.
- Yeah.

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And I wanna know
Nathan more, too.

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[indistinct chatter]

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[Danny]<i> At first,</i>
<i>meeting Neylan's mom,</i>

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they found each other
and we've been talking

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ever since we were little.

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[Alexis]
Their moms found, like, Nick

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and a few other people
and then like my mom really

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wasn't into the whole
donor thing

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and she was kind of like
staying away from it.

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And then I got interested

196
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and I started looking
for my half-siblings.

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She wasn't, like, against it.
She just didn't really

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think about it that much

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and, like, she was like,
"Oh, if my daughter's"

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interested in it,
I'll be interested in it...

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in it, too."
So, when I was old enough

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to understand and, like,
look for my half-siblings,

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then she kind of like
helped me out.

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Yeah.

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I have not had any contact

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with any of the mothers
before this.

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I've been sort of on the margin.

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So I find the experience
both delightful,

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I think they're all
very, very wonderful,

210
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but I also find it
quite frankly odd

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because here I am
with a group of women

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who have had children
by the same man as I have

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and we just met.
So it is a bit...

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Again, it's very delightful

215
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but it's also weird, I think.

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But we can't hate each other...

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- No. No. No.
- ...because our man

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didn't, like, screw around
or anything.

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- No. No.
- It's all by choice.

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It's... Yeah.

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I never in my wildest dreams

222
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would have thought
we would be sitting here

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with other children
from the same donor.

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I guess I never really
thought about the fact

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that Neylan was gonna
meet these other children,

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and they were gonna
be like siblings.

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They've got a connection

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and I think it's hard
for any of us

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to understand because
we all have the connection

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because we've picked
the same number.

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But the kids have the connection

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that they came
from the same person.

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[woman]<i> Okay, Donor 5114,</i>
<i>are you a student?</i>

234
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[Nathan]<i> Yes.</i>

235
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[woman]
And what are you studying?

236
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[man]<i> I'm studying</i>
<i>my masters in architecture.</i>

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[woman]<i> Can you give me</i>
<i>one or two adjectives</i>

238
00:11:22.982 --> 00:11:25.116
<i>that best describe you?</i>

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[man]<i> I'd say optimistic</i>
<i>and curious.</i>

240
00:11:27.987 --> 00:11:31.189
[woman]<i> And what do you</i>
<i>admire in others?</i>

241
00:11:31.223 --> 00:11:34.759
[man]<i> I admire when people</i>
<i>show a sense of courage</i>

242
00:11:34.794 --> 00:11:36.528
<i>and honesty.</i>

243
00:11:36.562 --> 00:11:38.596
[woman]<i> And what do you least</i>
<i>like about others?</i>

244
00:11:38.631 --> 00:11:41.700
[man]
<i>I least like lying, really.</i>

245
00:11:41.734 --> 00:11:43.368
<i>It something
that bothers me a lot.</i>

246
00:11:43.402 --> 00:11:45.070
- [woman]<i> Dishonesty?</i>
- [man]<i> Dishonesty.</i>

247
00:11:45.104 --> 00:11:47.672
[woman]<i> Okay. Great. Good.</i>

248
00:11:47.707 --> 00:11:49.240
<i>Do you have anything
that you would like to say</i>

249
00:11:49.275 --> 00:11:50.775
<i>to your recipient of your sperm</i>

250
00:11:50.810 --> 00:11:53.078
<i>or a child born from your sperm?</i>

251
00:11:53.112 --> 00:11:55.580
[man]<i> Yes.</i>
<i>I wish them all the luck.</i>

252
00:11:55.614 --> 00:11:59.217
[woman]<i> Okay. All right.</i>
<i>That's it. Thank you.</i>

253
00:11:59.251 --> 00:12:02.754
Well, the first time
I heard it, I was like...

254
00:12:02.788 --> 00:12:04.255
I was kind of shocked
to hear his voice

255
00:12:04.290 --> 00:12:06.291
because I didn't really, like,

256
00:12:06.325 --> 00:12:09.160
I didn't know like at all
what he was like

257
00:12:09.195 --> 00:12:12.797
and it just, like,
makes me more curious

258
00:12:12.832 --> 00:12:15.734
about what he's like
and what he looks like.

259
00:12:15.768 --> 00:12:19.137
[Alexis] I wished that
he had said more in the tape,

260
00:12:19.171 --> 00:12:21.439
like, I expected more.

261
00:12:21.474 --> 00:12:23.608
When they asked him, like,
if there was anything

262
00:12:23.642 --> 00:12:25.510
that he'd like
to pass on to, like,

263
00:12:25.544 --> 00:12:27.579
the recipients of his donation,

264
00:12:27.613 --> 00:12:30.515
like, I wish he had said
more than good luck,

265
00:12:30.549 --> 00:12:33.118
like, that kind...
That part kind of

266
00:12:33.152 --> 00:12:34.586
made me feel kind of empty,

267
00:12:34.620 --> 00:12:37.589
like, that's all
you have to say? Yeah.

268
00:12:37.623 --> 00:12:39.324
[Danny] Like it was almost
like in the profile

269
00:12:39.358 --> 00:12:41.092
that he like just donated

270
00:12:41.127 --> 00:12:43.361
because he needed
the college money.

271
00:12:43.395 --> 00:12:45.263
Sort of seemed like that.

272
00:12:45.297 --> 00:12:47.799
- [Neylan] Yeah.
- Right.

273
00:12:47.833 --> 00:12:50.135
If he wants to have,
like, contact with us

274
00:12:50.169 --> 00:12:51.336
when we get older.

275
00:12:51.370 --> 00:12:54.973
[dramatic music playing]

276
00:12:55.007 --> 00:12:58.009
[birds chirping]

277
00:13:06.252 --> 00:13:08.019
[Alexis]<i> I want our donor</i>
<i>to know that,</i>

278
00:13:08.053 --> 00:13:09.521
<i>yeah, we really want to meet him</i>

279
00:13:09.555 --> 00:13:11.589
<i>and we know that
he probably has a life</i>

280
00:13:11.624 --> 00:13:14.159
<i>of his own now
and he might have, like,</i>

281
00:13:14.193 --> 00:13:16.594
a partner and kids
that he's raised

282
00:13:16.629 --> 00:13:18.263
and that we just wanna have,

283
00:13:18.297 --> 00:13:21.232
like, some identity
of who we are.

284
00:13:21.267 --> 00:13:23.001
[Danny]<i> Because you wanna</i>
<i>know the other half of you,</i>

285
00:13:23.035 --> 00:13:25.804
<i>like, you only know
what your mom gave you.</i>

286
00:13:25.838 --> 00:13:27.205
- Yeah. Like...
- And sometimes

287
00:13:27.239 --> 00:13:28.573
you're not even that
similar to your mom,

288
00:13:28.607 --> 00:13:30.842
so you're like ugh.

289
00:13:30.876 --> 00:13:32.410
[Nick]
<i>It's, like, hard to, like,</i>

290
00:13:32.444 --> 00:13:34.679
<i>not be able to think
of who your dad is.</i>

291
00:13:34.713 --> 00:13:36.481
<i>Most of my friends
can just, like,</i>

292
00:13:36.515 --> 00:13:38.583
talk about their dad
or, like, know who they are

293
00:13:38.617 --> 00:13:40.218
and I can't, like...

294
00:13:40.252 --> 00:13:41.719
Like I can't even picture him
in my head

295
00:13:41.754 --> 00:13:43.955
of what he looks like,
only my mom.

296
00:13:45.024 --> 00:13:48.026
[dramatic music playing]

297
00:14:10.683 --> 00:14:12.116
[Alexis] So we're all
here in California

298
00:14:12.151 --> 00:14:13.952
and we're gathering
for our second

299
00:14:13.986 --> 00:14:16.888
sibling reunion.
Some of us haven't met before

300
00:14:16.922 --> 00:14:19.324
- and... Like Mattie...
- And me.

301
00:14:19.358 --> 00:14:21.226
...and Sadie.

302
00:14:21.260 --> 00:14:22.894
I think we're all
just looking forward

303
00:14:22.928 --> 00:14:25.230
to having a really good time
here with one another.

304
00:14:25.264 --> 00:14:28.233
[dramatic music playing]

305
00:14:34.340 --> 00:14:35.473
[Mattie] It hasn't, like,
hit me yet

306
00:14:35.507 --> 00:14:37.408
that, like, I met everyone

307
00:14:37.443 --> 00:14:39.444
because we all
just kind of clicked

308
00:14:39.478 --> 00:14:41.546
and we connected really well.

309
00:14:41.580 --> 00:14:43.648
<i>And it all felt
just really natural.</i>

310
00:14:43.682 --> 00:14:45.583
[Sadie]<i> Yeah.</i>
<i>We get along so well already</i>

311
00:14:45.618 --> 00:14:48.086
because we're related
so we're kind of not afraid

312
00:14:48.120 --> 00:14:49.554
to just be ourselves

313
00:14:49.588 --> 00:14:51.122
and we don't have
to like impress them

314
00:14:51.156 --> 00:14:52.590
<i>because we're all like
brothers and sisters,</i>

315
00:14:52.625 --> 00:14:54.392
and it's not like
meeting new people,

316
00:14:54.426 --> 00:14:56.895
<i>you have to worry about like
what they think of you.</i>

317
00:14:56.929 --> 00:14:59.797
[Mattie]<i> Yeah.</i>
<i>And we all like talk about</i>

318
00:14:59.832 --> 00:15:01.766
stuff about ourselves
that you normally

319
00:15:01.800 --> 00:15:03.501
wouldn't share
with other people,

320
00:15:03.535 --> 00:15:05.470
<i>and we compare ourselves,
like, oh,</i>

321
00:15:05.504 --> 00:15:07.705
<i>- you have the same...</i>
- [Sadie]<i> Yeah.</i>

322
00:15:07.740 --> 00:15:10.108
We have the same feet.

323
00:15:10.142 --> 00:15:12.377
[dramatic music playing]

324
00:15:12.411 --> 00:15:15.546
[Lisa]<i> Sadie and I found out</i>
<i>about the first reunion</i>

325
00:15:15.581 --> 00:15:17.715
<i>and it was too late
for us to come to</i>

326
00:15:17.750 --> 00:15:19.517
<i>and Sadie was devastated,</i>

327
00:15:19.551 --> 00:15:21.119
<i>and she wanted
to come on her own</i>

328
00:15:21.153 --> 00:15:22.487
and I had to explain that

329
00:15:22.521 --> 00:15:23.855
we really didn't know
anyone yet.

330
00:15:23.889 --> 00:15:26.791
And I promised her
that the next one,

331
00:15:26.825 --> 00:15:30.361
<i>that we would come
to no matter what.</i>

332
00:15:30.396 --> 00:15:32.063
[Amanda] <i>When I got with Cindy,</i>

333
00:15:32.097 --> 00:15:34.165
I said I will not be with you

334
00:15:34.233 --> 00:15:35.700
- unless we can have a child.
- We can have kids.

335
00:15:35.734 --> 00:15:37.335
And at that point,
we didn't know

336
00:15:37.369 --> 00:15:39.637
any other gay people
to begin with, much less

337
00:15:39.672 --> 00:15:42.473
any other people that
had children for sure.

338
00:15:42.508 --> 00:15:44.776
<i>For her to have not only a
connection to other families</i>

339
00:15:44.810 --> 00:15:46.477
<i>that are similar to ours
but then also to have</i>

340
00:15:46.512 --> 00:15:49.347
<i>a half-sibling or relation
to that connection.</i>

341
00:15:49.381 --> 00:15:52.483
And it's just bigger
than we could ever dream

342
00:15:52.518 --> 00:15:54.719
- and it's beautiful.
- [woman] Best ever.

343
00:15:54.753 --> 00:15:56.788
- [woman] [indistinct]
- Hey.

344
00:15:56.822 --> 00:15:58.523
[woman] I'm just gonna talk
to you later.

345
00:15:58.557 --> 00:15:59.991
[woman] Hey, Nate.

346
00:16:00.025 --> 00:16:03.728
[indistinct chatter]

347
00:16:03.762 --> 00:16:04.896
[Mattie]
<i>I've been looking forward</i>

348
00:16:04.930 --> 00:16:06.531
<i>to going to the Cryrobank</i>

349
00:16:06.565 --> 00:16:08.833
<i>just to like see
what it's all about.</i>

350
00:16:08.867 --> 00:16:11.102
It's just weird going
somewhere that he's been

351
00:16:11.136 --> 00:16:13.037
because I know
that I've always, like,

352
00:16:13.072 --> 00:16:15.506
imagined in my head ever
since I was a little girl,

353
00:16:15.541 --> 00:16:19.010
"Oh, I wonder,
like, how my dad is or,

354
00:16:19.044 --> 00:16:20.912
like, what he's doing
or where he's been."

355
00:16:20.946 --> 00:16:23.348
So it's just, kind of,
like a weird feeling.

356
00:16:23.382 --> 00:16:25.283
Like Mattie said,
since I was young,

357
00:16:25.317 --> 00:16:27.352
I've always had this
really, like,

358
00:16:27.386 --> 00:16:29.454
profound curiosity
to, like, know he is.

359
00:16:29.488 --> 00:16:32.123
So I guess whenever
I go places, like,

360
00:16:32.157 --> 00:16:33.958
when I went to New York.
I was like,

361
00:16:33.993 --> 00:16:36.127
"Oh, I bet he walked here.
I bet he's been here before."

362
00:16:36.161 --> 00:16:38.229
And when we go
to the California Cryrobank,

363
00:16:38.263 --> 00:16:39.897
we will know for sure
he's been here before.

364
00:16:39.932 --> 00:16:42.000
So that's, kind of, like,
a weird feeling

365
00:16:42.034 --> 00:16:44.202
but I'm excited.

366
00:16:44.236 --> 00:16:47.238
[dramatic music playing]

367
00:16:55.080 --> 00:16:56.881
[Dr. Cappy] Hello.

368
00:16:56.915 --> 00:16:59.784
Hello, welcome
to the California Cryrobank.

369
00:16:59.818 --> 00:17:01.953
It's wonderful to see everybody.

370
00:17:01.987 --> 00:17:04.489
Whether you realize it or not,

371
00:17:04.523 --> 00:17:07.792
you're a brand new generation
of what's taking place.

372
00:17:07.826 --> 00:17:10.528
I mean, all of a sudden,
from individuals

373
00:17:10.562 --> 00:17:12.630
you become an extended family,

374
00:17:12.664 --> 00:17:14.399
in two or three generations,
wow,

375
00:17:14.433 --> 00:17:16.701
what an extended family
you're gonna be.

376
00:17:21.173 --> 00:17:23.674
<i>All right. So this
is our cryogenic center</i>

377
00:17:23.709 --> 00:17:27.612
<i>and we distribute about
30 plus thousands of sperm</i>

378
00:17:27.646 --> 00:17:29.514
<i>every year all over the world.</i>

379
00:17:29.548 --> 00:17:31.349
And I would think
that at this time,

380
00:17:31.383 --> 00:17:33.785
we probably have about 65

381
00:17:33.819 --> 00:17:36.988
to maybe 70,000 children born.

382
00:17:37.022 --> 00:17:40.792
And by looking at your group
as an example,

383
00:17:40.859 --> 00:17:42.960
we're doing a good job.

384
00:17:42.995 --> 00:17:44.829
So somebody asked about sperm.

385
00:17:44.863 --> 00:17:47.432
So right here,
you can see the ampules,

386
00:17:47.466 --> 00:17:49.767
their sperm when it came.
Want to...

387
00:17:49.802 --> 00:17:51.636
Anybody want to take
and interesting picture?

388
00:17:54.673 --> 00:17:55.773
Whoa.

389
00:17:59.711 --> 00:18:01.179
How's that for a birthday cake?

390
00:18:01.213 --> 00:18:02.580
[indistinct chatter]

391
00:18:02.614 --> 00:18:04.582
Happy birthday.

392
00:18:06.385 --> 00:18:07.752
[Latrice]<i> I'm Latrice Allen.</i>

393
00:18:07.786 --> 00:18:11.589
I'm the donor
matching counselor.

394
00:18:11.623 --> 00:18:13.424
Initially when clients

395
00:18:13.459 --> 00:18:14.926
are coming in and they need help

396
00:18:14.960 --> 00:18:17.195
with making a selection
of the donor,

397
00:18:17.229 --> 00:18:18.930
they generally
will send me a picture

398
00:18:18.964 --> 00:18:20.565
of whomever
they're trying to match

399
00:18:20.599 --> 00:18:22.133
and I try to find a donor

400
00:18:22.167 --> 00:18:25.002
that has the same
similar characteristics.

401
00:18:25.037 --> 00:18:27.038
And then at the end of that,

402
00:18:27.072 --> 00:18:29.540
when the offsprings
are turning 18,

403
00:18:29.575 --> 00:18:31.742
they're calling me
to help them find

404
00:18:31.777 --> 00:18:33.811
their donors if possible.

405
00:18:33.846 --> 00:18:36.681
Who's the oldest of...
Out of all the offsprings?

406
00:18:36.715 --> 00:18:38.116
- How old are you?
- Fifteen.

407
00:18:38.183 --> 00:18:39.817
[Latrice] You're 15?
So I would imagine

408
00:18:39.852 --> 00:18:41.853
that you would be the first
one that would call me

409
00:18:41.887 --> 00:18:43.554
to find out if we could get
in contact with the owner.

410
00:18:43.589 --> 00:18:44.922
On my 18th birthday.

411
00:18:44.957 --> 00:18:45.890
[Latrice] What donor number?

412
00:18:45.924 --> 00:18:48.926
[all] 5114.

413
00:18:48.961 --> 00:18:50.194
[Latrice] Basically what happens

414
00:18:50.229 --> 00:18:52.196
with anonymous contact,
if the donor

415
00:18:52.231 --> 00:18:53.898
still wants to remain anonymous,

416
00:18:53.932 --> 00:18:55.900
he doesn't wanna release
his identity.

417
00:18:55.934 --> 00:18:58.169
However,
he's willing to participate

418
00:18:58.203 --> 00:18:59.470
in some type of communication

419
00:18:59.505 --> 00:19:01.072
that's facilitated through me.

420
00:19:01.106 --> 00:19:03.908
So, I will have the offspring
send me a bio.

421
00:19:03.942 --> 00:19:06.110
Maybe a list of questions,
some photos

422
00:19:06.145 --> 00:19:07.745
if they're comfortable
with doing that,

423
00:19:07.779 --> 00:19:10.248
I'll cut and paste,
email that to the donor,

424
00:19:10.282 --> 00:19:12.483
the donor responds,
cut and paste, send it back,

425
00:19:12.518 --> 00:19:14.952
we play Ping-Pong
until the donor says,

426
00:19:14.987 --> 00:19:16.287
you know, "Have a great life."

427
00:19:16.321 --> 00:19:17.989
I have answered
all your questions.

428
00:19:18.023 --> 00:19:20.791
I wish you the best." Or,
"I feel comfortable enough

429
00:19:20.826 --> 00:19:24.762
to have this person
have my contact information."

430
00:19:24.796 --> 00:19:26.797
A lot of these donors
are married.

431
00:19:26.832 --> 00:19:28.232
They have their own children.

432
00:19:28.267 --> 00:19:29.967
So some of them
have discussed it

433
00:19:30.002 --> 00:19:31.802
with their wives,
some of them haven't.

434
00:19:31.837 --> 00:19:33.304
I find that the ones

435
00:19:33.338 --> 00:19:35.072
that haven't discussed it
with their wives

436
00:19:35.107 --> 00:19:37.108
are a little bit
more apprehensive

437
00:19:37.142 --> 00:19:39.877
about having any type
of communication.

438
00:19:39.912 --> 00:19:43.214
I can generally talk them
into anonymous communication,

439
00:19:43.248 --> 00:19:45.783
especially if they say
no right off the bat.

440
00:19:45.817 --> 00:19:47.652
So it's, you know,
just give us this.

441
00:19:47.686 --> 00:19:50.755
These kids are not looking
for a father figure,

442
00:19:50.789 --> 00:19:53.424
they're looking for a missing
piece to their puzzle.

443
00:19:53.458 --> 00:19:56.460
[dramatic music playing]

444
00:20:07.673 --> 00:20:09.340
[woman] I'd love to, like,
analyze it.

445
00:20:10.609 --> 00:20:12.109
- Oh, my gosh.
- [man] Is it...

446
00:20:12.144 --> 00:20:13.778
Is that real speed?

447
00:20:13.812 --> 00:20:15.813
[man] That is real speed, yeah.

448
00:20:16.848 --> 00:20:17.982
[woman] What?

449
00:20:20.252 --> 00:20:23.454
[Margot]<i> We're checking out</i>
<i>actual sperm in microscopes</i>

450
00:20:23.488 --> 00:20:25.456
and on the screen,

451
00:20:25.490 --> 00:20:27.258
checking it where it all began.

452
00:20:31.096 --> 00:20:33.564
<i>What's your favorite one?</i>

453
00:20:33.599 --> 00:20:35.800
<i>Only one of those guys
is gonna be the winner.</i>

454
00:20:38.670 --> 00:20:40.304
[woman]<i> When you talk</i>
<i>about with your siblings,</i>

455
00:20:40.339 --> 00:20:41.639
like, when you saw the tanks

456
00:20:41.673 --> 00:20:43.207
and when you saw
the dry ice or...

457
00:20:43.242 --> 00:20:45.409
I don't know. It's just weird
to know that, like,

458
00:20:45.444 --> 00:20:47.645
part of us has been here before.

459
00:20:47.679 --> 00:20:49.413
[Dr. Cappy]
Mattie, how is it having

460
00:20:49.448 --> 00:20:51.649
so many new siblings?

461
00:20:51.683 --> 00:20:54.051
I like them all. They're great.

462
00:20:54.086 --> 00:20:55.886
Thank you so much.

463
00:20:55.921 --> 00:20:57.221
[Dr. Cappy]
And thanks for coming,

464
00:20:57.256 --> 00:20:59.657
- I'm sorry you're leaving.
- Oh, me too.

465
00:20:59.691 --> 00:21:01.659
I wish I could stay forever.

466
00:21:09.401 --> 00:21:11.502
[Sadie]<i> I'm glad</i>
<i>I went to the Cryrobank</i>

467
00:21:11.536 --> 00:21:14.038
<i>but at the same time
it made me feel a little bit</i>

468
00:21:14.072 --> 00:21:16.107
<i>like we're not empty, but...</i>

469
00:21:16.141 --> 00:21:17.675
we didn't really get
more answers.

470
00:21:17.709 --> 00:21:18.676
- I don't know.
- We didn't...

471
00:21:18.710 --> 00:21:19.977
I'm glad I went but I...

472
00:21:20.012 --> 00:21:22.313
we didn't really get
more answers,

473
00:21:22.347 --> 00:21:23.814
but I think it was good
to just see

474
00:21:23.849 --> 00:21:26.017
where it all began.

475
00:21:26.051 --> 00:21:28.486
<i>Even if the donor
wanted to meet us</i>

476
00:21:28.520 --> 00:21:30.621
<i>and we opened up
to meeting him as well,</i>

477
00:21:30.656 --> 00:21:32.290
<i>they couldn't connect us</i>

478
00:21:32.324 --> 00:21:34.025
<i>and I don't really think
that's really fair.</i>

479
00:21:34.059 --> 00:21:35.626
I don't think there's any
practical reason

480
00:21:35.661 --> 00:21:37.295
why you should say no

481
00:21:37.329 --> 00:21:40.598
if both sides
are open to contact.

482
00:21:42.534 --> 00:21:44.201
[Alexis]
<i>I think as soon as someone's</i>

483
00:21:44.236 --> 00:21:45.970
<i>close to turning 18,
I think we'll probably have</i>

484
00:21:46.004 --> 00:21:47.805
<i>like a countdown or something.</i>

485
00:21:47.839 --> 00:21:49.273
- [Sadie]<i> Yeah.</i>
- [Alexis]<i> But I don't think</i>

486
00:21:49.308 --> 00:21:50.808
<i>we should get our hopes
too high up</i>

487
00:21:50.842 --> 00:21:52.476
because there's a good chance
he'll say no,

488
00:21:52.511 --> 00:21:55.046
but we can get excited about it.

489
00:21:55.080 --> 00:21:56.180
Mmm-hmm.

490
00:22:02.587 --> 00:22:05.389
[Danny] That was my first
time swimming in the ocean.

491
00:22:05.424 --> 00:22:06.590
- Ever?
- Uh-huh.

492
00:22:06.625 --> 00:22:08.392
- Are you serious?
- Yes. I...

493
00:22:08.427 --> 00:22:09.760
Where have you been
all your life?

494
00:22:09.795 --> 00:22:13.230
Not like this on the east,
though.

495
00:22:13.265 --> 00:22:15.533
[woman] Grab your bag, Nathan.

496
00:22:15.567 --> 00:22:16.767
This is it.

497
00:22:16.802 --> 00:22:19.103
Anybody claim these socks? Ray?

498
00:22:19.137 --> 00:22:20.404
[indistinct chatter]

499
00:22:20.439 --> 00:22:21.739
[woman]
I think that there's a phone

500
00:22:21.773 --> 00:22:23.040
- underneath the bed.
- [man] Oh, good,

501
00:22:23.075 --> 00:22:24.942
because we're missing two.

502
00:22:24.976 --> 00:22:26.610
[Alexis]<i> The hardest part</i>
<i>of the trip, I think</i>

503
00:22:26.645 --> 00:22:29.046
<i>is just knowing
that you have to leave.</i>

504
00:22:29.081 --> 00:22:30.448
[Sadie]<i> It's gonna be</i>
<i>a while probably</i>

505
00:22:30.482 --> 00:22:32.550
<i>until we see each other.</i>

506
00:22:32.584 --> 00:22:34.352
[woman] Oh, yeah.

507
00:22:34.386 --> 00:22:35.753
[indistinct chatter]

508
00:22:35.787 --> 00:22:37.254
[woman]<i> The kids</i>
<i>are already starting</i>

509
00:22:37.289 --> 00:22:40.791
<i>to anticipate their goodbyes.</i>

510
00:22:40.826 --> 00:22:43.294
<i>There's a lot
of emotions flowing.</i>

511
00:22:46.732 --> 00:22:48.332
[Nick]<i> I'm thankful</i>
<i>that all the families</i>

512
00:22:48.367 --> 00:22:50.000
<i>let us come and let us have</i>

513
00:22:50.035 --> 00:22:52.570
<i>the opportunity to do all this.</i>

514
00:22:52.604 --> 00:22:54.105
[Neylan]<i> I just think</i>
<i>it's really bittersweet</i>

515
00:22:54.139 --> 00:22:56.006
<i>but you can definitely
feel the love</i>

516
00:22:56.041 --> 00:22:58.843
<i>and how much we're gonna
miss one another.</i>

517
00:22:58.877 --> 00:23:00.611
[Danny]<i> Every time,</i>
<i>it gets a bit harder</i>

518
00:23:00.645 --> 00:23:03.414
<i>to say goodbye,
but it's reassuring to know</i>

519
00:23:03.448 --> 00:23:04.815
<i>that we'll have another one</i>

520
00:23:04.850 --> 00:23:07.017
<i>of these visits again
sometime soon.</i>

521
00:23:13.792 --> 00:23:16.193
[dramatic music playing]

522
00:23:16.228 --> 00:23:18.863
[Latrice] So two of the moms,
Brandy and Fran,

523
00:23:18.897 --> 00:23:21.031
approached me after their visit

524
00:23:21.066 --> 00:23:22.800
and was curious to know

525
00:23:22.834 --> 00:23:25.002
if we had any additional vials

526
00:23:25.036 --> 00:23:27.171
from donor 5114.

527
00:23:27.205 --> 00:23:29.017
<i>And we did a little research</i>

528
00:23:29.041 --> 00:23:32.076
<i>and found that we had
an abandoned purchase</i>

529
00:23:32.110 --> 00:23:34.011
<i>and storage account
where the client</i>

530
00:23:34.045 --> 00:23:35.646
<i>didn't pay for the vial.</i>

531
00:23:35.680 --> 00:23:37.481
<i>So, they were deemed abandoned</i>

532
00:23:37.516 --> 00:23:39.817
<i>and we were able to take
those vials back</i>

533
00:23:39.851 --> 00:23:41.185
<i>and make those available</i>

534
00:23:41.219 --> 00:23:44.622
<i>for Brandy and Fran.</i>

535
00:23:44.656 --> 00:23:47.691
<i>The chances of having vials
from a donor,</i>

536
00:23:47.726 --> 00:23:51.462
<i>from that far back is just,
like, pretty unlikely.</i>

537
00:23:51.496 --> 00:23:53.998
<i>As far as we know,
the vials that we found</i>

538
00:23:54.032 --> 00:23:56.267
<i>were the two last vials
that we have</i>

539
00:23:56.301 --> 00:23:59.737
<i>or will have available
on donor 5114</i>

540
00:23:59.771 --> 00:24:02.673
<i>and we wish them all the best.</i>

541
00:24:05.410 --> 00:24:09.013
[wind blowing]

542
00:24:11.082 --> 00:24:12.716
[Brandy] So this is the cane

543
00:24:12.751 --> 00:24:14.852
that the specimen comes in

544
00:24:14.886 --> 00:24:17.054
and the vial is clipped

545
00:24:17.088 --> 00:24:19.356
into this little cane.

546
00:24:19.391 --> 00:24:22.059
And this is the vial.
This is all we get.

547
00:24:22.093 --> 00:24:23.427
This is our shot.

548
00:24:23.462 --> 00:24:24.929
It's not very much,

549
00:24:24.963 --> 00:24:27.531
but hopefully it'll do
the trick.

550
00:24:27.566 --> 00:24:29.633
[Francesca] We just need one.

551
00:24:29.668 --> 00:24:31.168
[Brandy]<i> We've been together</i>
<i>almost eight years</i>

552
00:24:31.203 --> 00:24:32.703
and it was pretty cool

553
00:24:32.737 --> 00:24:35.539
because Francesca and I
never would have thought

554
00:24:35.574 --> 00:24:38.242
that this could have been
a possibility for us.

555
00:24:38.276 --> 00:24:40.878
[Francesca]<i> I knew that</i>
<i>we were getting ready to try.</i>

556
00:24:40.912 --> 00:24:43.981
Our goal was, like,
within the next six months.

557
00:24:44.015 --> 00:24:45.082
I mean it was just like destiny

558
00:24:45.116 --> 00:24:46.684
that this was just frozen

559
00:24:46.718 --> 00:24:48.085
just waiting for me to mature...

560
00:24:48.119 --> 00:24:49.386
- Grow up?
- ...and get old enough

561
00:24:49.421 --> 00:24:52.556
and grow up to be able
to use them.

562
00:24:52.591 --> 00:24:53.591
[Brandy] This is the vial.

563
00:24:53.625 --> 00:24:56.260
This is the 5114 vial.

564
00:24:56.294 --> 00:24:59.497
This is the sperm
that come in here

565
00:24:59.531 --> 00:25:00.998
- that we used get...
- Is this actually 5114?

566
00:25:01.032 --> 00:25:02.233
...pregnant. Yeah.

567
00:25:03.935 --> 00:25:05.736
- That's pretty small, huh?
- It's...

568
00:25:05.770 --> 00:25:07.438
they're still stuff in there?

569
00:25:07.472 --> 00:25:08.906
[Brandy] Probably.

570
00:25:08.940 --> 00:25:10.774
Besides the...

571
00:25:10.809 --> 00:25:11.876
yellow thing?

572
00:25:11.910 --> 00:25:13.210
[Brandy] I wouldn't open it.

573
00:25:13.245 --> 00:25:15.446
I'm not going to.

574
00:25:15.514 --> 00:25:17.882
[Danny]<i> It's crazy to think</i>
<i>that I was like</i>

575
00:25:17.916 --> 00:25:20.251
<i>once in a tiny little
container like this</i>

576
00:25:20.285 --> 00:25:22.586
being shipped off to New Mexico

577
00:25:22.621 --> 00:25:24.221
and that I came in

578
00:25:24.256 --> 00:25:26.323
this just little tiny container.

579
00:25:26.358 --> 00:25:27.558
It was just neat thinking like

580
00:25:27.592 --> 00:25:28.492
that could be your brother

581
00:25:28.527 --> 00:25:30.394
and, or sister in there.

582
00:25:30.428 --> 00:25:33.163
Just this little thing could
change your whole future.

583
00:25:33.198 --> 00:25:35.232
It's pretty crazy.

584
00:25:35.267 --> 00:25:36.767
I'm really nervous for tomorrow

585
00:25:36.801 --> 00:25:40.204
when we find out if my mom
is pregnant or not.

586
00:25:40.238 --> 00:25:42.540
It would be definitely cool
if she is,

587
00:25:42.574 --> 00:25:43.874
to have another half-sibling

588
00:25:43.909 --> 00:25:45.743
and it'll be cool

589
00:25:45.777 --> 00:25:48.045
to have another addition
to my family.

590
00:25:48.079 --> 00:25:51.015
[dramatic music playing]

591
00:25:57.188 --> 00:26:00.791
[Brandy]<i> I'm excited</i>
<i>but I'm pretty nervous.</i>

592
00:26:00.825 --> 00:26:02.560
This could be like...

593
00:26:04.896 --> 00:26:06.897
a new life for us

594
00:26:06.932 --> 00:26:11.402
with a baby
or keep trying, so...

595
00:26:13.204 --> 00:26:14.705
I'm just a little nervous...

596
00:26:16.675 --> 00:26:18.509
excited.

597
00:26:18.543 --> 00:26:21.612
I can't wait to see
what it shows.

598
00:26:21.646 --> 00:26:22.880
But I'm nervous.

599
00:26:24.983 --> 00:26:28.185
Fran, do you want to use
the digital or the other one?

600
00:26:32.090 --> 00:26:33.190
Yeah.

601
00:26:33.224 --> 00:26:34.992
- Here we go.
- Here we go.

602
00:26:35.026 --> 00:26:37.928
[dramatic music playing]

603
00:27:02.721 --> 00:27:04.154
[indistinct]

604
00:27:08.393 --> 00:27:10.427
We've been waiting
for a long time.

605
00:27:14.933 --> 00:27:17.001
Maybe this test is a dud.

606
00:27:17.035 --> 00:27:18.702
Yeah.

607
00:27:18.737 --> 00:27:20.404
[Brandy] It's on a timer
right now

608
00:27:20.438 --> 00:27:22.072
- and it'll tell us...
- [Francesca] I think it says

609
00:27:22.107 --> 00:27:23.941
three minutes, so.

610
00:27:25.143 --> 00:27:26.443
You're so shaky.

611
00:27:26.478 --> 00:27:28.045
[Brandy] I know.

612
00:27:28.079 --> 00:27:30.447
A little more pressure
this time than the last time.

613
00:27:33.885 --> 00:27:36.787
[dramatic music playing]

614
00:27:41.926 --> 00:27:44.161
[Francesca crying]

615
00:27:53.271 --> 00:27:54.738
Next time.

616
00:27:57.575 --> 00:27:58.876
I love you.

617
00:27:58.910 --> 00:27:59.777
I love you, too.

618
00:27:59.811 --> 00:28:01.612
I'm proud of you.

619
00:28:01.646 --> 00:28:04.548
[dramatic music playing]

620
00:28:10.288 --> 00:28:11.655
It's a new journey
for us, though,

621
00:28:11.690 --> 00:28:13.424
because you've never had
to keep trying.

622
00:28:13.458 --> 00:28:14.825
I know.

623
00:28:14.859 --> 00:28:16.126
I don't know
what this feels like.

624
00:28:16.161 --> 00:28:17.461
The last time it was positive

625
00:28:17.495 --> 00:28:19.830
the first try.

626
00:28:19.864 --> 00:28:21.565
It's okay.

627
00:28:21.633 --> 00:28:24.501
[dramatic music playing]

628
00:28:40.185 --> 00:28:42.286
[Lorie]<i> So we're in Provo, Utah.</i>

629
00:28:42.320 --> 00:28:44.288
I'm here for a parent conference

630
00:28:44.322 --> 00:28:48.325
at Nathan's new school.

631
00:28:48.359 --> 00:28:51.361
He's been here
for five months today.

632
00:28:51.396 --> 00:28:53.030
And it's a...

633
00:28:54.566 --> 00:28:56.133
therapeutic boarding school,

634
00:28:56.167 --> 00:28:58.235
is where he's at now.

635
00:28:58.269 --> 00:28:59.837
And he...

636
00:28:59.871 --> 00:29:02.239
he was having some struggles
in his school in Denver.

637
00:29:02.273 --> 00:29:04.575
And at the end
of the first semester

638
00:29:04.609 --> 00:29:06.477
of ninth grade,

639
00:29:06.511 --> 00:29:11.215
he didn't pass
many of his classes.

640
00:29:11.249 --> 00:29:14.218
<i>There were relationship
issues at home</i>

641
00:29:14.252 --> 00:29:18.255
<i>and some behaviors
that were concerning.</i>

642
00:29:18.289 --> 00:29:21.091
He didn't wanna go to therapy.

643
00:29:21.126 --> 00:29:22.860
And he was past the point

644
00:29:22.894 --> 00:29:24.528
where I could just pick him up
and put him in the car

645
00:29:24.562 --> 00:29:25.896
and take him places.

646
00:29:25.930 --> 00:29:27.898
So when I decided
to send him away,

647
00:29:27.932 --> 00:29:29.566
I could either let him know

648
00:29:29.601 --> 00:29:31.668
what was going to be coming,

649
00:29:33.404 --> 00:29:36.807
or they show up at your door
at 3:00 AM

650
00:29:36.841 --> 00:29:40.511
and wake your child up
and take them.

651
00:29:40.545 --> 00:29:43.847
And I was afraid if I told him

652
00:29:43.882 --> 00:29:46.316
what would be coming,
that he would run away,

653
00:29:46.351 --> 00:29:48.352
and I didn't want him
out on the streets,

654
00:29:48.386 --> 00:29:50.554
I didn't want him, you know,

655
00:29:50.588 --> 00:29:52.489
to disappear.

656
00:29:52.524 --> 00:29:54.158
So, I chose the path

657
00:29:54.192 --> 00:29:57.895
of having them come at 3:00 AM.

658
00:29:57.929 --> 00:29:59.930
It was the hardest thing
I ever did.

659
00:30:03.334 --> 00:30:05.335
And he was angry.

660
00:30:07.906 --> 00:30:10.307
Well, one day, like,
kinda early in the morning,

661
00:30:10.341 --> 00:30:12.543
two guys just like showed up
in my room

662
00:30:12.577 --> 00:30:14.244
and didn't really explain,

663
00:30:14.279 --> 00:30:15.512
like, what they were doing,

664
00:30:15.547 --> 00:30:17.581
but they just kind of said like,

665
00:30:17.615 --> 00:30:19.082
"Either you could just come
with us to

666
00:30:19.117 --> 00:30:21.418
the airport or, like,
we could handcuff you

667
00:30:21.452 --> 00:30:24.221
and, like, put you in the car
and take you to the airport."

668
00:30:24.255 --> 00:30:26.690
So then I just went with them.

669
00:30:26.724 --> 00:30:28.859
<i>When they woke me up,
I saw her in my room</i>

670
00:30:28.893 --> 00:30:30.227
<i>but she didn't really
talk to me,</i>

671
00:30:30.261 --> 00:30:32.262
<i>she just said,
"I love you, really.</i>

672
00:30:32.297 --> 00:30:34.998
<i>I'm sorry," or something,
and just walked out.</i>

673
00:30:35.033 --> 00:30:37.000
I guess when I got here,
I was pretty confused

674
00:30:37.035 --> 00:30:39.469
because I didn't really,
like, know how things worked.

675
00:30:39.504 --> 00:30:41.738
And then also angry at my mom

676
00:30:41.773 --> 00:30:45.142
because I felt like betrayed.

677
00:30:45.176 --> 00:30:48.045
Being an only parent was...

678
00:30:48.079 --> 00:30:49.813
in hindsight now, it's...

679
00:30:49.848 --> 00:30:52.716
It was not as easy
as I thought it would be.

680
00:30:52.750 --> 00:30:54.251
You don't have the checks
and balances,

681
00:30:54.285 --> 00:30:57.020
you don't have someone there
to say,

682
00:30:57.055 --> 00:30:58.388
you know,
"Is that the way you wanted

683
00:30:58.423 --> 00:30:59.756
to handle that situation?"

684
00:30:59.791 --> 00:31:02.025
It's just you and your kid,
you know?

685
00:31:04.329 --> 00:31:07.464
And so I was...
I was a little controlling,

686
00:31:07.498 --> 00:31:09.366
I was critical,

687
00:31:09.400 --> 00:31:12.202
<i>and I think that it was hard</i>

688
00:31:12.237 --> 00:31:14.571
<i>not having anyone else.</i>

689
00:31:14.606 --> 00:31:17.074
Like, not knowing my dad
hasn't really...

690
00:31:17.108 --> 00:31:18.876
I don't think it's like
caused any problems

691
00:31:18.910 --> 00:31:21.278
between me and my mom,

692
00:31:21.312 --> 00:31:23.780
even though she thinks that
as, like,

693
00:31:23.815 --> 00:31:25.883
when I'm angry with her,
she'll ask me, like,

694
00:31:25.917 --> 00:31:28.752
is it because you, like,
don't know your dad?

695
00:31:28.786 --> 00:31:31.455
When she asked me that,
I just tell her, like,

696
00:31:31.489 --> 00:31:33.457
it's not true
because it really isn't.

697
00:31:33.491 --> 00:31:36.360
I don't really care.

698
00:31:36.427 --> 00:31:37.494
[Lorie] You know,
what I'm hoping

699
00:31:37.528 --> 00:31:39.663
is that we can fix

700
00:31:39.697 --> 00:31:42.065
what has gone wrong

701
00:31:42.133 --> 00:31:45.302
and move on and enjoy each other

702
00:31:45.336 --> 00:31:49.206
for, you know, from here on out.

703
00:31:49.240 --> 00:31:51.241
[indistinct chatter]

704
00:31:56.514 --> 00:31:58.916
[Nathan]<i> Heritage wanted</i>
<i>to bring all the parents</i>

705
00:31:58.950 --> 00:32:00.651
<i>and the kids
over to a ropes course</i>

706
00:32:00.685 --> 00:32:03.387
<i>so that families going
can, like,</i>

707
00:32:03.421 --> 00:32:06.957
<i>help build trust and work
on their relationship.</i>

708
00:32:06.991 --> 00:32:08.725
I don't know, I don't think
you can really, like,

709
00:32:08.760 --> 00:32:10.928
fix a relationship
with a ropes course.

710
00:32:12.830 --> 00:32:14.398
[Lorie] Holy smokes.

711
00:32:14.432 --> 00:32:17.634
[laughs]

712
00:32:17.669 --> 00:32:19.369
Oh, my God.

713
00:32:19.404 --> 00:32:22.039
[dramatic music playing]

714
00:32:22.073 --> 00:32:23.941
I'm only gonna get,
like, two steps.

715
00:32:23.975 --> 00:32:26.176
[laughs]

716
00:32:26.210 --> 00:32:27.644
- I can't lift.
- Why?

717
00:32:27.679 --> 00:32:29.513
Because it's hard to lift
this weight up.

718
00:32:29.547 --> 00:32:31.181
- You think it's easy?
- [indistinct]

719
00:32:31.215 --> 00:32:34.718
[Lorie] I weigh about
as much as a car.

720
00:32:34.752 --> 00:32:36.553
<i>I am planning on pushing myself</i>

721
00:32:36.587 --> 00:32:37.988
<i>out of my comfort zone.</i>

722
00:32:38.022 --> 00:32:39.723
<i>I think it's important
for Nathan</i>

723
00:32:39.757 --> 00:32:43.193
<i>to see how important
this is to me.</i>

724
00:32:43.227 --> 00:32:45.395
And if I bug out and say,

725
00:32:45.430 --> 00:32:47.397
"I don't wanna do it,"

726
00:32:47.432 --> 00:32:49.933
what message is that sending
to him, you know?

727
00:32:49.968 --> 00:32:52.202
That he's not worth me

728
00:32:52.236 --> 00:32:54.504
getting a little uncomfortable.

729
00:32:54.539 --> 00:32:58.709
So I'm terrified

730
00:32:58.743 --> 00:33:01.878
but I'm gonna go
a little bit farther

731
00:33:01.913 --> 00:33:04.781
than I thought I could go.

732
00:33:04.816 --> 00:33:07.150
- [woman] Okay. I just want...
- [man] Yeah. Me, too.

733
00:33:09.153 --> 00:33:11.054
- [woman] Did you grab it?
- [woman] Yeah.

734
00:33:11.089 --> 00:33:12.723
[man] It'll suspend you.

735
00:33:12.757 --> 00:33:14.658
It'll suspend you like a bridge.

736
00:33:14.726 --> 00:33:16.693
[man] There you go. Yes.
Way to go.

737
00:33:16.728 --> 00:33:18.261
Good job.

738
00:33:18.296 --> 00:33:21.231
[indistinct chatter]

739
00:33:25.470 --> 00:33:27.270
[man] You have the strength
in the middle.

740
00:33:27.305 --> 00:33:28.905
Strength's in the middle.

741
00:33:28.940 --> 00:33:31.008
[indistinct chatter]

742
00:33:31.042 --> 00:33:33.110
[Nathan] Push on me.
Push on my arms.

743
00:33:34.545 --> 00:33:36.113
Oh.

744
00:33:36.147 --> 00:33:37.914
- [woman] We got her.
- [woman] We got her.

745
00:33:37.949 --> 00:33:40.017
- [man] Oh. Good job.
- [woman] Okay.

746
00:33:40.051 --> 00:33:42.619
Good job. Look it up.

747
00:33:42.653 --> 00:33:43.920
[Lorie] Okay. He's good.

748
00:33:43.955 --> 00:33:46.023
He's too fast.

749
00:33:46.057 --> 00:33:47.124
[woman] Great.

750
00:33:48.559 --> 00:33:50.594
[woman] Good job.

751
00:33:50.628 --> 00:33:53.897
[Lorie] Oh, good try.

752
00:33:53.931 --> 00:33:55.766
- [man] Good job.
- [Lorie] Awesome.

753
00:33:55.800 --> 00:33:56.900
[Nathan] I missed.

754
00:33:56.934 --> 00:33:59.870
[dramatic music playing]

755
00:34:03.374 --> 00:34:05.075
Oh, my God. I'm doing this.

756
00:34:05.109 --> 00:34:07.277
Okay. Well, we'll see
how far I get.

757
00:34:07.311 --> 00:34:08.445
[laughs]

758
00:34:08.479 --> 00:34:09.579
Are you gonna go upside down?

759
00:34:09.614 --> 00:34:11.448
Yeah, right.

760
00:34:11.482 --> 00:34:13.216
Yeah, that's my style.

761
00:34:14.986 --> 00:34:17.087
Shit.

762
00:34:17.121 --> 00:34:19.456
[woman] Keep your eyes
on your goal.

763
00:34:19.490 --> 00:34:20.824
Climbing.

764
00:34:22.894 --> 00:34:24.494
Push up good with your left leg.

765
00:34:29.333 --> 00:34:31.334
Push with that left leg
with everything you got.

766
00:34:31.369 --> 00:34:32.903
[woman] Yeah, push your leg.

767
00:34:32.937 --> 00:34:35.939
[Lorie panting]

768
00:34:35.973 --> 00:34:37.774
[Lorie] I think I'm stuck.

769
00:34:39.444 --> 00:34:40.944
I can't...

770
00:34:40.978 --> 00:34:42.512
- Bring your right foot up.
- [woman] It's okay.

771
00:34:42.547 --> 00:34:44.281
- Shit.
- [woman] Nathan,

772
00:34:44.315 --> 00:34:45.449
make her hear your voice.

773
00:34:45.483 --> 00:34:47.918
"Mom, try one more step."

774
00:34:47.952 --> 00:34:49.920
[Nathan] Mom, before you
give up, try to...

775
00:34:49.954 --> 00:34:51.822
- There you go.
- [woman] Go. Go.

776
00:34:51.856 --> 00:34:53.190
[woman] She's gonna hear
your voice

777
00:34:53.224 --> 00:34:54.958
- over anybody else's.
- [Lorie gasping]

778
00:34:54.992 --> 00:34:56.760
[woman] Don't look go down,
you can take one more step.

779
00:34:56.794 --> 00:34:58.795
- [man] Done.
- [Lorie] I'm done.

780
00:35:01.099 --> 00:35:02.899
[man] Grab the rope.

781
00:35:02.934 --> 00:35:04.234
- Put your weight back.
- [Lorie gasping]

782
00:35:04.268 --> 00:35:05.669
[woman] There you go,
there you go,

783
00:35:05.703 --> 00:35:07.604
- there you go.
- You're fine, you're fine.

784
00:35:10.374 --> 00:35:11.508
There you go.

785
00:35:13.244 --> 00:35:14.644
[man] Hey, good job for trying.

786
00:35:14.679 --> 00:35:16.513
[woman] Okay. Your legs
are gonna be wobbly.

787
00:35:16.547 --> 00:35:18.415
Your legs are gonna be wobbly
so just sit right down.

788
00:35:20.551 --> 00:35:22.519
Okay, Lorie, you are awesome.

789
00:35:22.553 --> 00:35:24.187
- [man] Good job trying.
- [woman] Really good job.

790
00:35:24.222 --> 00:35:25.689
- [man] Great job.
- You're gonna wanna find

791
00:35:25.723 --> 00:35:27.390
somewhere just to sit
and kinda shake it out

792
00:35:27.425 --> 00:35:29.159
- a little bit.
- Okay.

793
00:35:29.193 --> 00:35:30.560
- Yeah, I don't know... Okay.
- Okay?

794
00:35:30.595 --> 00:35:32.062
Did you hear Nathan
talking to you?

795
00:35:32.096 --> 00:35:33.763
No, I didn't hear anything.

796
00:35:33.798 --> 00:35:35.332
[woman] I thought if you were
gonna hear anyone,

797
00:35:35.366 --> 00:35:36.900
you would hear him over us.

798
00:35:36.934 --> 00:35:38.635
- Good job.
- Good try.

799
00:35:38.669 --> 00:35:39.836
[man] Are you tight?

800
00:35:42.239 --> 00:35:44.708
Oh, that was scary.

801
00:35:44.742 --> 00:35:46.910
Super, super intimidating, huh?

802
00:35:46.944 --> 00:35:48.645
Really, really amazing.

803
00:35:48.679 --> 00:35:50.514
I don't know if you realize
how far you were,

804
00:35:50.548 --> 00:35:52.516
but you were halfway
up that pole.

805
00:35:52.550 --> 00:35:53.717
- [man] Yeah.
- Halfway up the pole.

806
00:35:53.751 --> 00:35:54.918
You pushed yourself. Good job.

807
00:35:54.952 --> 00:35:56.153
You did.

808
00:35:56.187 --> 00:35:57.254
And you took the one more step

809
00:35:57.288 --> 00:35:58.599
even when you didn't want to.

810
00:35:58.623 --> 00:36:00.056
- Yeah.
- [woman] We're good.

811
00:36:00.091 --> 00:36:01.057
[man] We're good.

812
00:36:01.092 --> 00:36:03.059
[cheerful music playing]

813
00:36:03.094 --> 00:36:04.427
[Nathan] <i>I didn't really, like,</i>

814
00:36:04.462 --> 00:36:06.062
<i>have any set goals coming here,</i>

815
00:36:06.097 --> 00:36:08.064
<i>but I know, like,
I was gonna try</i>

816
00:36:08.099 --> 00:36:11.468
<i>to do my best on all
the courses or activities.</i>

817
00:36:11.502 --> 00:36:13.770
<i>And I think I did that.</i>

818
00:36:13.804 --> 00:36:16.740
[cheerful music playing]

819
00:36:18.609 --> 00:36:19.943
[Lorie]<i> I was happy</i>
<i>with the experience.</i>

820
00:36:19.977 --> 00:36:21.311
<i>It gave me a little confidence</i>

821
00:36:21.345 --> 00:36:22.712
<i>that I could something</i>

822
00:36:22.747 --> 00:36:24.614
<i>that I was terrified of doing.</i>

823
00:36:24.649 --> 00:36:26.783
<i>I took one step
more than I thought I could.</i>

824
00:36:26.817 --> 00:36:28.919
<i>So I was happy with that.</i>

825
00:36:28.953 --> 00:36:30.820
I think there was,
like, one course

826
00:36:30.855 --> 00:36:33.089
that helped me and my mom,

827
00:36:33.124 --> 00:36:36.159
like, kinda like build
a little bit more trust.

828
00:36:36.194 --> 00:36:37.494
- I don't know what to call it.
- The wires?

829
00:36:37.528 --> 00:36:38.962
- The two wires.
- Yeah.

830
00:36:38.996 --> 00:36:42.032
The wires where you have
to support each other.

831
00:36:42.066 --> 00:36:44.968
He approached every obstacle

832
00:36:45.002 --> 00:36:47.971
with such confidence and...

833
00:36:48.005 --> 00:36:49.573
But I didn't see you
back down from anything.

834
00:36:49.607 --> 00:36:51.608
You didn't...
you didn't walk away,

835
00:36:51.642 --> 00:36:52.809
you didn't give up.

836
00:36:52.843 --> 00:36:55.445
You tried your hardest,
you know?

837
00:36:55.479 --> 00:36:57.314
And that's all I can ask.

838
00:37:00.318 --> 00:37:02.185
You should do your best.

839
00:37:04.922 --> 00:37:06.656
And it made me really proud.

840
00:37:08.426 --> 00:37:11.361
[dramatic music playing]

841
00:37:16.901 --> 00:37:17.867
[Nancy] You have to see.

842
00:37:20.838 --> 00:37:22.639
These are heavier
than you think they'd be.

843
00:37:22.673 --> 00:37:23.940
- [Hannah] Are they?
- Yeah.

844
00:37:23.975 --> 00:37:25.475
- [Hannah] Are those snails?
- Yeah.

845
00:37:25.509 --> 00:37:29.479
[dramatic music playing]

846
00:37:29.513 --> 00:37:32.148
[Nancy]<i> I have two kids</i>
<i>from donor 5114.</i>

847
00:37:32.183 --> 00:37:34.517
Johnny who will be 15
in a few weeks

848
00:37:34.552 --> 00:37:37.053
and Hannah who's 12 and a half.

849
00:37:37.088 --> 00:37:39.990
<i>And I think our journey
to joining up</i>

850
00:37:40.024 --> 00:37:41.491
<i>with the other kids</i>

851
00:37:41.525 --> 00:37:43.293
<i>has been a little bit different.</i>

852
00:37:43.327 --> 00:37:45.729
They just haven't really seemed

853
00:37:45.763 --> 00:37:47.964
to feel the need and the pull

854
00:37:47.999 --> 00:37:50.467
that some of the other kids
do to get together

855
00:37:50.501 --> 00:37:51.935
and get to know the others

856
00:37:51.969 --> 00:37:55.272
and I've been wanting
to follow them

857
00:37:55.306 --> 00:37:57.507
and let their wisdom and comfort

858
00:37:57.541 --> 00:37:59.109
sort of guide the journey.

859
00:37:59.143 --> 00:38:01.111
[dramatic music playing]

860
00:38:01.145 --> 00:38:04.014
[Hannah]<i> I haven't always</i>
<i>wanted to meet my siblings</i>

861
00:38:04.048 --> 00:38:06.016
<i>and I was really nervous.</i>

862
00:38:06.050 --> 00:38:07.584
The biggest surprise

863
00:38:07.618 --> 00:38:10.287
is not what anybody's like
or what they look like

864
00:38:10.321 --> 00:38:12.022
<i>because I've seen pictures
of all of them.</i>

865
00:38:12.056 --> 00:38:14.691
<i>It's really
that I keep forgetting</i>

866
00:38:14.725 --> 00:38:16.259
<i>that I'm related to them</i>

867
00:38:16.294 --> 00:38:18.862
<i>and then I'll just...
It'll just hit me</i>

868
00:38:18.896 --> 00:38:20.263
and I'll remember it
and I'm like,

869
00:38:20.298 --> 00:38:22.332
"Wait, these people
are like my family.

870
00:38:22.366 --> 00:38:25.235
And it's just kind of cool
and strange

871
00:38:25.269 --> 00:38:27.404
at the same time."

872
00:38:27.438 --> 00:38:30.907
[Elisa]<i> When we drove up</i>
<i>to have this mini reunion,</i>

873
00:38:30.941 --> 00:38:33.209
<i>I was extremely nervous.</i>

874
00:38:33.244 --> 00:38:35.111
I had worked
for three quarters of the day

875
00:38:35.146 --> 00:38:36.913
at my job and I...

876
00:38:36.947 --> 00:38:38.682
When walked in my office
that morning,

877
00:38:38.716 --> 00:38:40.016
I told my coworkers,

878
00:38:40.051 --> 00:38:41.551
"I'm on another planet."

879
00:38:41.585 --> 00:38:45.355
<i>And I just had
this crazy energy in me</i>

880
00:38:45.389 --> 00:38:49.025
ever since we got in the car
to drive up here.

881
00:38:49.060 --> 00:38:50.527
[Lily]<i> I used to be</i>
<i>very nervous, like,</i>

882
00:38:50.594 --> 00:38:52.395
<i>I was about to throw up
when I was about</i>

883
00:38:52.430 --> 00:38:53.697
<i>to meet my siblings</i>

884
00:38:53.731 --> 00:38:54.964
because it really does matter.

885
00:38:54.999 --> 00:38:56.666
Like, you're meeting...
It's one thing

886
00:38:56.701 --> 00:38:58.401
where you're just meeting
someone for the first time,

887
00:38:58.436 --> 00:39:00.904
but it's another
being related to them.

888
00:39:00.938 --> 00:39:03.306
And having this huge, like,
biological connection,

889
00:39:03.341 --> 00:39:06.242
like, you have no idea
how that's gonna turn out.

890
00:39:06.277 --> 00:39:09.279
[rain pattering]

891
00:39:09.313 --> 00:39:11.748
[Lily] And you have
a huge family.

892
00:39:11.782 --> 00:39:13.450
- Is it a crazy family?
- Well, from what I've heard,

893
00:39:13.484 --> 00:39:15.218
you have a huge family, too.

894
00:39:16.887 --> 00:39:18.121
- One person.
- She doesn't even

895
00:39:18.155 --> 00:39:20.423
understand the joke.

896
00:39:20.458 --> 00:39:21.791
How can I work with this?

897
00:39:21.826 --> 00:39:23.693
[laughs] Okay. Okay.

898
00:39:23.728 --> 00:39:25.095
Do you mean this family?

899
00:39:25.129 --> 00:39:27.197
Yeah, this is part
of your family too.

900
00:39:27.231 --> 00:39:29.099
Got you.

901
00:39:29.133 --> 00:39:30.767
[Neylan]<i> I think meeting</i>
<i>your siblings</i>

902
00:39:30.801 --> 00:39:32.836
<i>and how comfortable
you feel around them</i>

903
00:39:32.870 --> 00:39:34.437
<i>kind of depends on their age</i>

904
00:39:34.472 --> 00:39:36.239
because if they're older,
you're gonna be like,

905
00:39:36.273 --> 00:39:38.241
"Well, are they gonna think
I'm took kiddish?

906
00:39:38.275 --> 00:39:40.643
Are they gonna get annoyed
by me and stuff?"

907
00:39:40.678 --> 00:39:42.412
But then if they're younger,
you're like,

908
00:39:42.446 --> 00:39:44.180
<i>"Am I gonna get along with them?"</i>

909
00:39:44.215 --> 00:39:46.082
<i>Are they gonna like stuff
that I've grown out of?</i>

910
00:39:46.117 --> 00:39:48.485
<i>"Or are we gonna get
along better?"</i>

911
00:39:48.519 --> 00:39:50.820
[Sadie]<i> It's kinda hard</i>
<i>that there's so many</i>

912
00:39:50.855 --> 00:39:52.756
because I don't know,
it just seems not as special

913
00:39:52.790 --> 00:39:54.457
if there are, like, as many...

914
00:39:54.492 --> 00:39:56.926
Like, the... There's a huge
quantity of siblings

915
00:39:56.961 --> 00:39:59.129
and it's not as special
as if there's a few.

916
00:39:59.163 --> 00:40:00.130
- But...
- And it's kind of hard

917
00:40:00.164 --> 00:40:02.031
because, like,

918
00:40:02.066 --> 00:40:04.434
there's always gonna be
someone that gets left out

919
00:40:04.468 --> 00:40:06.002
or can't come to a reunion

920
00:40:06.036 --> 00:40:08.438
and that their feelings
are gonna be hurt sometimes

921
00:40:08.472 --> 00:40:10.240
but you can't please everyone

922
00:40:10.274 --> 00:40:11.841
with 21 siblings.

923
00:40:11.876 --> 00:40:13.343
[rain pattering]

924
00:40:13.377 --> 00:40:15.812
[Nancy] I think there
has to be some quality

925
00:40:15.846 --> 00:40:17.814
in all of us that we,

926
00:40:17.848 --> 00:40:20.417
out of thousands
of potential donors,

927
00:40:20.451 --> 00:40:22.685
we zeroed in on that one.

928
00:40:22.720 --> 00:40:25.789
But I have absolutely
no interest whatsoever

929
00:40:25.823 --> 00:40:27.624
in knowing who he is.

930
00:40:27.658 --> 00:40:30.527
What we called him when Lily
was growing up was the seed.

931
00:40:30.561 --> 00:40:31.928
- [laughter]
- Like, I mean,

932
00:40:31.962 --> 00:40:33.630
because he's not...

933
00:40:33.664 --> 00:40:36.733
I don't see him
as other than the genes,

934
00:40:36.767 --> 00:40:40.236
I don't see him
as being at all related

935
00:40:40.271 --> 00:40:41.438
to these kids.

936
00:40:41.472 --> 00:40:43.106
I mean, he didn't raise them,

937
00:40:43.140 --> 00:40:44.574
he's not their father,

938
00:40:44.608 --> 00:40:46.176
he's a seed.

939
00:40:46.210 --> 00:40:48.678
I mean, maybe it's because
Lily has a father.

940
00:40:48.712 --> 00:40:50.246
You know, when she was seven,

941
00:40:50.281 --> 00:40:52.682
she was adopted by my husband.

942
00:40:52.716 --> 00:40:54.017
- Mmm-hmm.
- [Linette] I don't have

943
00:40:54.051 --> 00:40:55.785
any emotional connection to him

944
00:40:55.820 --> 00:40:58.488
and it's hard for me to...

945
00:40:58.522 --> 00:41:00.824
I mean, because I do have
an emotional connection

946
00:41:00.858 --> 00:41:03.059
with all of you.

947
00:41:03.093 --> 00:41:05.762
And it's hard for me,

948
00:41:05.796 --> 00:41:07.997
like, when somebody had asked

949
00:41:08.032 --> 00:41:11.968
or, you know, where's your dad?

950
00:41:12.002 --> 00:41:13.703
I don't have a dad.

951
00:41:13.737 --> 00:41:16.840
She made up a story about him
being eaten by sharks

952
00:41:16.874 --> 00:41:19.476
because she got tired
of people asking,

953
00:41:19.510 --> 00:41:21.478
you know, where's your...
where's your dad?

954
00:41:21.512 --> 00:41:23.146
It's very complicated

955
00:41:23.180 --> 00:41:25.682
but, you know,

956
00:41:25.716 --> 00:41:28.151
their relationship
with each other

957
00:41:28.185 --> 00:41:32.055
is unique.

958
00:41:32.089 --> 00:41:35.058
But their relationship with him

959
00:41:35.092 --> 00:41:37.527
will be a whole
different ball game.

960
00:41:37.561 --> 00:41:39.262
Worst that could happen
is he would completely

961
00:41:39.296 --> 00:41:40.897
- reject them.
- [woman] And that would have

962
00:41:40.931 --> 00:41:42.832
a very negative effect on them.

963
00:41:42.867 --> 00:41:44.334
But then on the other hand,
I also think, well,

964
00:41:44.368 --> 00:41:47.136
maybe I'm overestimating

965
00:41:47.171 --> 00:41:48.238
how much that would affect them

966
00:41:48.272 --> 00:41:50.907
because when I think about,

967
00:41:50.941 --> 00:41:53.977
you know, a father figure
or connection to men

968
00:41:54.011 --> 00:41:56.579
who, you know,
I'm biologically connected,

969
00:41:56.614 --> 00:41:58.348
too, if he had rejected me,

970
00:41:58.382 --> 00:42:01.251
that would have been horrible,
but he was my dad.

971
00:42:01.285 --> 00:42:03.953
[Lisa] For me, that isn't
something that says,

972
00:42:03.988 --> 00:42:05.388
"Well, don't go there

973
00:42:05.422 --> 00:42:07.790
because you might get hurt
or rejected."

974
00:42:07.825 --> 00:42:09.926
- Mmm-hmm.
- That means

975
00:42:09.960 --> 00:42:11.661
- thought needs to go into it.
- Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.

976
00:42:11.695 --> 00:42:14.230
But that's like
any relationship, job...

977
00:42:14.265 --> 00:42:15.732
Anything has risks.

978
00:42:15.766 --> 00:42:17.834
[dramatic music playing]

979
00:42:26.010 --> 00:42:27.410
[Nancy S]<i> I guess</i>
<i>one of the differences</i>

980
00:42:27.444 --> 00:42:29.112
<i>between the kids and the moms</i>

981
00:42:29.146 --> 00:42:31.114
<i>is that, as the kids grow older,</i>

982
00:42:31.148 --> 00:42:33.249
the fact
that they're donor kids,

983
00:42:33.284 --> 00:42:36.452
for me, fades, it has faded.

984
00:42:36.487 --> 00:42:37.987
And for them,
it doesn't fade, in fact,

985
00:42:38.022 --> 00:42:39.889
I think, may...
As they get older

986
00:42:39.924 --> 00:42:41.157
and wanna know more
about who they are,

987
00:42:41.191 --> 00:42:42.492
it gets stronger for them.

988
00:42:42.526 --> 00:42:44.160
<i>And I just worry</i>

989
00:42:44.194 --> 00:42:45.795
<i>that they're gonna get caught up</i>

990
00:42:45.829 --> 00:42:49.132
<i>in real strong
emotional entanglements</i>

991
00:42:49.166 --> 00:42:51.534
that may be difficult for them

992
00:42:51.569 --> 00:42:54.337
to sort out down the road.

993
00:42:58.576 --> 00:43:00.543
[Alexis]<i> The exterior,</i>
<i>even though it seems, like,</i>

994
00:43:00.578 --> 00:43:03.046
<i>it's really fun and it's
a real good experience</i>

995
00:43:03.080 --> 00:43:05.882
being in this,
like, donor situation,

996
00:43:05.916 --> 00:43:08.451
there are just, like,
a lot of aspects

997
00:43:08.485 --> 00:43:10.186
about the donor situation

998
00:43:10.220 --> 00:43:12.956
that are painful,

999
00:43:12.990 --> 00:43:15.491
that even little things
that just add up,

1000
00:43:15.526 --> 00:43:18.962
like, there's this whole
other side of your family

1001
00:43:18.996 --> 00:43:20.830
that you know nothing about.

1002
00:43:20.864 --> 00:43:24.934
And just having
20 other half-siblings

1003
00:43:24.969 --> 00:43:26.869
is a lot to take in,

1004
00:43:26.904 --> 00:43:28.438
like, you tell people
and they say,

1005
00:43:28.472 --> 00:43:30.440
"Oh, that's so cool.
Do you know them all?"

1006
00:43:30.474 --> 00:43:33.009
But it's impossible
to know them all

1007
00:43:33.043 --> 00:43:36.479
and it's hard to know
that you have to share

1008
00:43:36.513 --> 00:43:40.883
the donor with all
of these other people.

1009
00:43:40.918 --> 00:43:43.620
And it's just...
It's not competition

1010
00:43:43.654 --> 00:43:46.956
but it's hard to explain.

1011
00:43:46.991 --> 00:43:50.827
[dramatic music playing]

1012
00:43:50.861 --> 00:43:53.763
[indistinct chatter]

1013
00:43:56.734 --> 00:43:59.669
[dramatic music playing]

1014
00:44:42.046 --> 00:44:43.513
- [woman] Here you go.
- Oh, yeah.

1015
00:44:43.547 --> 00:44:46.282
[woman] Good job, honey.

1016
00:44:46.316 --> 00:44:48.117
Push again for me.
Push, push, push, push, push.

1017
00:44:48.152 --> 00:44:49.452
Yeah. There we go. Yeah.

1018
00:44:49.486 --> 00:44:52.188
Perfect. Okay. Okay.

1019
00:44:52.222 --> 00:44:53.356
Push again. Okay.

1020
00:44:53.390 --> 00:44:54.590
Take your baby. Take your baby.

1021
00:44:54.625 --> 00:44:56.459
Take your child and grab him.

1022
00:44:56.493 --> 00:44:58.061
Hey, buddy.

1023
00:44:58.095 --> 00:45:00.596
[woman] There you go.
You got him.

1024
00:45:00.631 --> 00:45:02.098
- All right.
- Baby is disconnected.

1025
00:45:02.132 --> 00:45:03.833
If you wanna go get some O2.

1026
00:45:03.867 --> 00:45:05.301
Okay.

1027
00:45:05.335 --> 00:45:07.537
- [baby crying]
- There you go. There we go.

1028
00:45:12.710 --> 00:45:14.510
Congratulations.

1029
00:45:17.681 --> 00:45:18.948
[Brandy]<i> So we had</i>
<i>one vial left,</i>

1030
00:45:18.982 --> 00:45:20.316
<i>we just had one more shot</i>

1031
00:45:20.350 --> 00:45:21.451
<i>to be able to get pregnant</i>

1032
00:45:21.485 --> 00:45:23.152
<i>and so we're just grateful</i>

1033
00:45:23.187 --> 00:45:25.788
<i>that the second time,
obviously, worked.</i>

1034
00:45:25.823 --> 00:45:27.256
<i>And here he is.</i>

1035
00:45:27.291 --> 00:45:29.492
<i>He's just a perfect blessing.</i>

1036
00:45:31.862 --> 00:45:34.163
[Danny]<i> It's really cool</i>
<i>to see them just overwhelmed</i>

1037
00:45:34.198 --> 00:45:36.999
<i>with joy with baby Grayson
coming into the family</i>

1038
00:45:37.034 --> 00:45:39.268
and mama Fran being able
to have a kid

1039
00:45:39.303 --> 00:45:42.739
from 5114 and be able to,
maybe, like,

1040
00:45:42.773 --> 00:45:46.075
link together and be more
connected with the others.

1041
00:45:46.110 --> 00:45:48.845
[dramatic music playing]

1042
00:45:50.380 --> 00:45:52.749
[Brandy] Hi, Grayson,
does that feel good?

1043
00:45:52.783 --> 00:45:54.584
[Zeke] It's your mom...

1044
00:45:54.618 --> 00:45:56.419
[Brandy] Look at you
rocking him.

1045
00:45:56.453 --> 00:45:59.522
You're such a good big brother.

1046
00:45:59.556 --> 00:46:02.258
[Zeke]<i> I think having</i>
<i>another brother</i>

1047
00:46:02.292 --> 00:46:04.093
<i>is really cool</i>

1048
00:46:04.128 --> 00:46:06.929
because once he gets older,

1049
00:46:06.964 --> 00:46:10.867
we might all do

1050
00:46:10.901 --> 00:46:15.404
a lot of fun stuff if we're
really close together.

1051
00:46:15.439 --> 00:46:18.374
[dramatic music playing]

1052
00:46:20.277 --> 00:46:23.012
[indistinct] baby.

1053
00:46:23.046 --> 00:46:24.714
[Brandy]<i> So, this is Grayson.</i>

1054
00:46:24.748 --> 00:46:27.717
He's the very last 5114.

1055
00:46:27.751 --> 00:46:30.820
He was born
on the 25th of August

1056
00:46:30.854 --> 00:46:33.022
<i>at 3:47.</i>

1057
00:46:33.056 --> 00:46:36.392
<i>This family that we have
has been primarily</i>

1058
00:46:36.426 --> 00:46:38.394
<i>because of the artificial
insemination</i>

1059
00:46:38.428 --> 00:46:39.896
<i>and this donor.</i>

1060
00:46:39.930 --> 00:46:41.564
<i>And we just wanna let
our kids know</i>

1061
00:46:41.632 --> 00:46:43.199
<i>that we're so blessed</i>

1062
00:46:43.233 --> 00:46:44.534
for each and every one of them

1063
00:46:44.568 --> 00:46:46.369
and that they all mean
so much to us

1064
00:46:46.403 --> 00:46:48.704
and we're not
the perfect parents,

1065
00:46:48.739 --> 00:46:52.074
but we sure enjoy the journey
and being with them

1066
00:46:52.109 --> 00:46:55.845
and trying to learn as we go.

1067
00:46:55.879 --> 00:46:57.914
It kind evens things out
because before,

1068
00:46:57.948 --> 00:46:59.182
as you all know,

1069
00:46:59.216 --> 00:47:01.450
we have two moms
and a little sister.

1070
00:47:01.485 --> 00:47:02.485
And it was just me and Zeke.

1071
00:47:02.519 --> 00:47:04.287
So now, it, kinda, evens out

1072
00:47:04.321 --> 00:47:07.590
the estrogen to testosterone
in the house.

1073
00:47:07.624 --> 00:47:09.158
The what?

1074
00:47:09.193 --> 00:47:10.993
[laughs]

1075
00:47:11.028 --> 00:47:12.728
What's that mean?

1076
00:47:12.763 --> 00:47:15.665
[jet ski revving]

1077
00:47:23.907 --> 00:47:27.143
[Nancy C]<i> I was not able</i>
<i>to go to the last reunion.</i>

1078
00:47:27.177 --> 00:47:29.712
<i>And when Alexis came back,</i>

1079
00:47:29.746 --> 00:47:33.449
<i>she was very emotionally
absent with us</i>

1080
00:47:33.483 --> 00:47:37.587
<i>and so we felt
very rejected by her.</i>

1081
00:47:37.621 --> 00:47:40.590
Even from the time I picked
her up at the airport,

1082
00:47:40.624 --> 00:47:43.259
you know, she didn't embrace me,

1083
00:47:43.293 --> 00:47:45.761
she didn't say,
"Hey, it's great to see you,

1084
00:47:45.796 --> 00:47:47.263
I missed you,"

1085
00:47:47.297 --> 00:47:50.099
it was, like,
she didn't wanna be home.

1086
00:47:50.133 --> 00:47:51.734
I think the part of it
is that...

1087
00:47:51.768 --> 00:47:54.136
About the rejection
that my mom and Luke feel

1088
00:47:54.171 --> 00:47:57.039
is that... They feel that,
like, at least to me,

1089
00:47:57.074 --> 00:47:59.275
they're not enough, kind of.

1090
00:47:59.309 --> 00:48:02.511
And, I mean, that's not true,

1091
00:48:02.546 --> 00:48:04.380
but it's also a little true.

1092
00:48:04.414 --> 00:48:07.817
Like I do feel
this thing missing

1093
00:48:07.851 --> 00:48:09.986
and I do, like, for myself

1094
00:48:10.020 --> 00:48:12.488
need to go and fill that.

1095
00:48:14.324 --> 00:48:15.958
So as much as I love them,

1096
00:48:15.993 --> 00:48:18.527
no, they're not enough
in some ways.

1097
00:48:18.562 --> 00:48:20.229
And, yeah, that's hurtful and...

1098
00:48:20.264 --> 00:48:23.266
But, yeah, that's true,
so I can't change that.

1099
00:48:23.300 --> 00:48:25.801
[Nancy C] You know,
I will say that I want her

1100
00:48:25.836 --> 00:48:28.871
to love her siblings
and I want them to love her

1101
00:48:28.906 --> 00:48:32.842
and I do genuinely feel
that way,

1102
00:48:32.876 --> 00:48:35.811
but I also feel
that our little family

1103
00:48:35.846 --> 00:48:39.615
is uniquely special
because we share

1104
00:48:39.650 --> 00:48:41.217
our day-to-day lives together.

1105
00:48:41.251 --> 00:48:43.452
And when, you know,
when we're depressed,

1106
00:48:43.487 --> 00:48:45.221
when we're sick,
we're going through

1107
00:48:45.255 --> 00:48:47.056
all the tough times together.

1108
00:48:47.090 --> 00:48:50.526
You can, kind of, juxtapose
that to my siblings,

1109
00:48:50.560 --> 00:48:52.728
like, we don't live together

1110
00:48:52.763 --> 00:48:55.865
and we share this huge problem.

1111
00:48:55.899 --> 00:48:59.502
And we're able to empathize
with one another

1112
00:48:59.536 --> 00:49:02.672
despite the fact
that we live so far away.

1113
00:49:02.706 --> 00:49:07.009
So, that needs to count
for something, too.

1114
00:49:07.044 --> 00:49:08.377
[Nancy] I understand that.

1115
00:49:08.412 --> 00:49:10.579
I think that's a really
valid point,

1116
00:49:10.614 --> 00:49:13.349
is the affinity that you feel

1117
00:49:13.383 --> 00:49:17.019
because you share
this quest, this identity,

1118
00:49:17.054 --> 00:49:19.622
this pursuit that no one else
shares with you,

1119
00:49:19.656 --> 00:49:21.557
I completely get that.

1120
00:49:21.591 --> 00:49:25.394
You know, we can empathize
with the separation

1121
00:49:25.429 --> 00:49:27.096
that you've experienced
from your siblings,

1122
00:49:27.130 --> 00:49:29.098
but I'm simply talking about

1123
00:49:29.132 --> 00:49:32.068
the way we feel, I think,
is also very legitimate.

1124
00:49:32.102 --> 00:49:35.338
And I think that you should
show empathy for that as well.

1125
00:49:35.372 --> 00:49:37.673
I never even felt, like, "Ugh,
I don't wanna be with them,"

1126
00:49:37.708 --> 00:49:39.342
I didn't wanna be
with anybody, you know,

1127
00:49:39.376 --> 00:49:42.545
not specifically you,
I just wanted to be by myself.

1128
00:49:42.579 --> 00:49:45.581
So, yeah.

1129
00:49:48.218 --> 00:49:51.220
[dramatic music playing]

1130
00:49:55.092 --> 00:49:56.459
[Alexis]<i> I've known</i>
<i>my whole life</i>

1131
00:49:56.493 --> 00:49:58.194
<i>that I came from a sperm donor.</i>

1132
00:49:58.261 --> 00:50:00.696
<i>I mean, when I was,
like, three years old,</i>

1133
00:50:00.731 --> 00:50:02.932
<i>I didn't know
in the same way I know now,</i>

1134
00:50:02.966 --> 00:50:04.600
<i>but I still knew that
there was something different</i>

1135
00:50:04.634 --> 00:50:06.569
<i>from most other people.</i>

1136
00:50:06.603 --> 00:50:09.005
<i>I always really wanted a dad
and I would always ask my mom</i>

1137
00:50:09.039 --> 00:50:11.007
<i>"Mom, when am I gonna
get a dad?"</i>

1138
00:50:11.041 --> 00:50:13.109
<i>And until, like,
third or fourth grade,</i>

1139
00:50:13.143 --> 00:50:16.112
<i>all I knew was that
I had a donor,</i>

1140
00:50:16.146 --> 00:50:18.180
<i>but I didn't know
anything about him.</i>

1141
00:50:18.215 --> 00:50:21.784
<i>Ever since then, my curiosity
has just grown exponentially.</i>

1142
00:50:21.818 --> 00:50:24.353
<i>And then, in middle school,
I started looking for him.</i>

1143
00:50:24.388 --> 00:50:26.956
<i>And then it just
all led up to here.</i>

1144
00:50:26.990 --> 00:50:29.992
[dramatic music playing]

1145
00:50:34.598 --> 00:50:36.332
[Alexis]<i> I guess the first</i>
<i>thing I ever did</i>

1146
00:50:36.366 --> 00:50:37.666
<i>in terms of looking
for the donor</i>

1147
00:50:37.701 --> 00:50:39.535
<i>is I went on ancestry.com.</i>

1148
00:50:39.569 --> 00:50:41.504
I just looked up
people born in 1969

1149
00:50:41.538 --> 00:50:43.305
in Fort Collins, Colorado.

1150
00:50:43.339 --> 00:50:46.108
And I hoped that, like,
somehow I'd find him like that

1151
00:50:46.143 --> 00:50:48.944
and nothing.

1152
00:50:48.979 --> 00:50:52.114
I learned that he was, like,
top 20 in the nation in track.

1153
00:50:52.149 --> 00:50:54.583
I ordered track record books.

1154
00:50:54.618 --> 00:50:56.118
And, of course, as soon
as I got this, I was, like,

1155
00:50:56.153 --> 00:50:57.887
"That's him,"
obviously it isn't.

1156
00:50:57.921 --> 00:51:00.956
And I, like, highlighted
all the ones that say 1969

1157
00:51:00.991 --> 00:51:02.992
and I, like, Googled all of them

1158
00:51:03.026 --> 00:51:05.194
and that was
a fruitless endeavor.

1159
00:51:05.228 --> 00:51:06.929
Just shows you
how huge of a world it is

1160
00:51:06.963 --> 00:51:09.965
and that it is really tough
to find people.

1161
00:51:10.033 --> 00:51:11.801
I just like
keeping stuff like this

1162
00:51:11.835 --> 00:51:14.403
to, kinda, make connections
with him, I don't know,

1163
00:51:14.438 --> 00:51:16.572
but he's probably
in here somewhere.

1164
00:51:16.606 --> 00:51:19.175
So, I've probably read
his name 500 times before,

1165
00:51:19.209 --> 00:51:23.179
but just don't know
which one it is.

1166
00:51:23.213 --> 00:51:25.414
When I first met my dad
or my stepdad,

1167
00:51:25.449 --> 00:51:27.817
whatever you wanna call him,

1168
00:51:27.851 --> 00:51:29.819
I really didn't like him.

1169
00:51:29.853 --> 00:51:32.455
<i>And it never really felt
like he was part of my life,</i>

1170
00:51:32.489 --> 00:51:34.623
<i>even though he lived with me,
he was just that guy</i>

1171
00:51:34.658 --> 00:51:36.992
<i>that lived in my house.</i>

1172
00:51:37.027 --> 00:51:39.195
He's a really critical person.

1173
00:51:39.229 --> 00:51:42.631
<i>He's not very affectionate.</i>

1174
00:51:42.666 --> 00:51:44.300
[Javier]<i> I always criticize</i>

1175
00:51:44.334 --> 00:51:45.935
because that was the way

1176
00:51:45.969 --> 00:51:47.970
that my parents were,
you know, they were all...

1177
00:51:48.004 --> 00:51:49.972
Always trying
to tell me to do...

1178
00:51:50.006 --> 00:51:51.974
Not because they didn't love
me, but, you know, the...

1179
00:51:52.008 --> 00:51:55.978
And I... And in the long-term,
I think it helped me out

1180
00:51:56.012 --> 00:51:59.148
when they were very strict,
you know, they were like,

1181
00:51:59.182 --> 00:52:00.983
"You need to do this,
you need to do that."

1182
00:52:01.017 --> 00:52:03.686
They never said, "Oh, Javier,
you're doing it great," okay?

1183
00:52:03.720 --> 00:52:05.821
I never heard that from my...

1184
00:52:05.856 --> 00:52:08.657
from my... from my dad
or my mom.

1185
00:52:08.692 --> 00:52:10.559
<i>My father was always working</i>

1186
00:52:10.594 --> 00:52:13.696
<i>and when years went by
and I got older</i>

1187
00:52:13.730 --> 00:52:15.264
<i>and I had kids,</i>

1188
00:52:15.298 --> 00:52:18.200
I realized that he never
expressed himself too much,

1189
00:52:18.235 --> 00:52:21.670
but now I know that he really
loved me a lot, so...

1190
00:52:21.705 --> 00:52:24.473
Because I'm repeating
the same story.

1191
00:52:24.508 --> 00:52:27.076
Javier has never upfront
discussed his feelings

1192
00:52:27.110 --> 00:52:32.481
about the donors-sibling
situation with me,

1193
00:52:32.516 --> 00:52:34.917
but I just kind of know
he's supportive of it.

1194
00:52:34.951 --> 00:52:37.219
I'm Catholic
and I'm very religious

1195
00:52:37.254 --> 00:52:41.257
and I don't believe
too much in this situation

1196
00:52:41.291 --> 00:52:47.263
where you maneuver
or manage life, you know.

1197
00:52:47.297 --> 00:52:50.232
<i>But now that Alexis is here,
you know, of course,</i>

1198
00:52:50.300 --> 00:52:54.403
<i>she's entitled to all
the love that I can give.</i>

1199
00:52:54.437 --> 00:52:56.038
And it's sad,
of course, I don't know

1200
00:52:56.072 --> 00:53:00.409
what would've happened to me
in that situation,

1201
00:53:00.443 --> 00:53:03.112
you know, because I had
the perfect family.

1202
00:53:03.146 --> 00:53:07.049
I do think having Javier
in my life has...

1203
00:53:07.083 --> 00:53:09.985
propelled me to want to find
my biological father because,

1204
00:53:10.020 --> 00:53:11.654
like, even though I love Javier,

1205
00:53:11.688 --> 00:53:13.255
he was never enough.

1206
00:53:13.290 --> 00:53:15.758
<i>In situations
where it's been really bad</i>

1207
00:53:15.792 --> 00:53:17.493
<i>or bumpy with Javier,</i>

1208
00:53:17.527 --> 00:53:19.595
<i>I've always imagined
what would it be like</i>

1209
00:53:19.629 --> 00:53:21.764
if my real my dad
was there instead or...

1210
00:53:21.798 --> 00:53:25.301
"My real dad."

1211
00:53:25.335 --> 00:53:27.136
Yeah.

1212
00:53:29.773 --> 00:53:31.440
[Lisa]<i> Babe, you wanna get</i>
<i>some of your stuff</i>

1213
00:53:31.474 --> 00:53:33.943
- and start packing?
- [Sadie] Sure.

1214
00:53:33.977 --> 00:53:36.946
[Lisa] We're gonna be there
for four days.

1215
00:53:36.980 --> 00:53:39.481
<i>Sadie and I are packing up
to go to the reunion</i>

1216
00:53:39.516 --> 00:53:41.650
<i>in Breckenridge, Colorado.</i>

1217
00:53:41.685 --> 00:53:43.319
There's gonna be a ton
of people,

1218
00:53:43.353 --> 00:53:45.888
so that's good
and can be overwhelming,

1219
00:53:45.922 --> 00:53:48.324
but we're gonna meet
some new siblings.

1220
00:53:48.358 --> 00:53:50.226
<i>Which is always a good thing,</i>

1221
00:53:50.260 --> 00:53:53.095
<i>I'm glad people are starting
to reach out and come out.</i>

1222
00:53:53.129 --> 00:53:54.964
<i>And we're gonna see
some people we haven't seen</i>

1223
00:53:54.998 --> 00:53:57.466
<i>since the California reunion,</i>

1224
00:53:57.500 --> 00:54:00.035
so we're looking forward
to all of that.

1225
00:54:00.070 --> 00:54:02.605
You have all your cameras
and film?

1226
00:54:02.639 --> 00:54:03.672
Chargers?

1227
00:54:03.707 --> 00:54:05.374
[Sadie] I'll get those.

1228
00:54:05.408 --> 00:54:07.176
<i>These time around, I haven't
talked to the siblings</i>

1229
00:54:07.210 --> 00:54:08.811
<i>as much over the year,</i>

1230
00:54:08.845 --> 00:54:10.379
some of the relationships
with the siblings

1231
00:54:10.413 --> 00:54:12.381
have kind of mellowed out
because...

1232
00:54:12.415 --> 00:54:14.383
well, we're just, like,
growing up and getting older.

1233
00:54:14.417 --> 00:54:16.329
<i>And at first, it was
really exciting</i>

1234
00:54:16.353 --> 00:54:17.953
<i>because it was like
a new thing in our life.</i>

1235
00:54:17.988 --> 00:54:19.722
<i>And then after a while,
it kind of becomes like</i>

1236
00:54:19.756 --> 00:54:21.624
<i>a normal thing.</i>

1237
00:54:21.658 --> 00:54:23.826
<i>And there's also so many
siblings, so it's hard to get</i>

1238
00:54:23.860 --> 00:54:26.362
<i>as excited every time
you meet like a new one,</i>

1239
00:54:26.396 --> 00:54:28.364
<i>even though it's always
interesting.</i>

1240
00:54:28.398 --> 00:54:31.166
And also, like, long-distance
relationships are always hard,

1241
00:54:31.201 --> 00:54:33.302
you know, the communication
and everything,

1242
00:54:33.336 --> 00:54:37.172
so I'm not really sure
how it'll be this time around.

1243
00:54:38.541 --> 00:54:41.543
[whimsical music playing]

1244
00:54:50.587 --> 00:54:52.021
[Margot]
<i>Baking a goat cheese, peach,</i>

1245
00:54:52.055 --> 00:54:54.056
caramelized onion, basil tarts.

1246
00:54:54.090 --> 00:54:56.625
Just a little something
to whip up for the family.

1247
00:54:56.660 --> 00:54:59.228
We've got 32 people,

1248
00:54:59.262 --> 00:55:02.765
and everybody has every kind
of eating lifestyles

1249
00:55:02.799 --> 00:55:04.733
and it's just fun.

1250
00:55:07.237 --> 00:55:08.671
[woman] You can have two,
there's more.

1251
00:55:08.705 --> 00:55:10.239
- I'm starving.
- And you can have a napkin

1252
00:55:10.273 --> 00:55:11.373
- if you want.
- Thank you.

1253
00:55:11.408 --> 00:55:13.876
Chelsea, do you want one?

1254
00:55:13.910 --> 00:55:15.544
Yes, please.

1255
00:55:15.578 --> 00:55:18.881
[indistinct chatter]

1256
00:55:18.915 --> 00:55:21.250
[laughter]

1257
00:55:21.284 --> 00:55:22.918
[Jack] I wanna ask you
if you remember

1258
00:55:22.952 --> 00:55:24.620
making this decision?

1259
00:55:24.654 --> 00:55:28.691
No. I do not. I don't.

1260
00:55:28.725 --> 00:55:30.893
Here in Breckenridge
for the fourth reunion.

1261
00:55:30.927 --> 00:55:33.696
We have biggest group
of siblings that we ever had.

1262
00:55:33.730 --> 00:55:36.699
There's Zeke, Hannah, Sadie,

1263
00:55:36.733 --> 00:55:39.401
Neylan, Alexis, Mattie,

1264
00:55:39.436 --> 00:55:41.870
Danny, Lily, Nick,

1265
00:55:41.905 --> 00:55:44.940
Johnny, Bradley, me Jack,

1266
00:55:44.974 --> 00:55:47.443
and Grayson.

1267
00:55:47.477 --> 00:55:49.078
[Johnny]<i> I completely regret</i>

1268
00:55:49.112 --> 00:55:51.880
<i>not coming to
the other reunions already,</i>

1269
00:55:51.915 --> 00:55:53.682
because one of the ways
I kind of cope

1270
00:55:53.717 --> 00:55:55.017
with the whole donor dad thing

1271
00:55:55.051 --> 00:55:57.886
is kind of just
not thinking about it.

1272
00:55:57.921 --> 00:56:00.923
You know, it's kind of hard
to not think about it

1273
00:56:00.957 --> 00:56:04.126
when you're surrounded by,
you know, 13 other kids

1274
00:56:04.160 --> 00:56:05.594
that have the same
donor dad as you.

1275
00:56:05.628 --> 00:56:07.196
How can you not think
about the donor?

1276
00:56:07.230 --> 00:56:08.931
<i>I've constantly been
talking about it,</i>

1277
00:56:08.965 --> 00:56:10.566
<i>ever since I got here,
all we've been talking about</i>

1278
00:56:10.600 --> 00:56:12.067
<i>is like how much we look alike</i>

1279
00:56:12.102 --> 00:56:13.736
<i>and like the donor
and it feels good.</i>

1280
00:56:13.770 --> 00:56:15.971
<i>And I wish I had done it
earlier in my life</i>

1281
00:56:16.005 --> 00:56:19.475
and maybe I wouldn't be...
I wouldn't have had issues,

1282
00:56:19.509 --> 00:56:21.977
like, personal issues if I had
done it earlier in life.

1283
00:56:22.011 --> 00:56:24.313
[indistinct chatter]

1284
00:56:24.347 --> 00:56:26.148
You should get this,
you should get this.

1285
00:56:26.182 --> 00:56:28.517
Come on, look at their noses
bounce right now.

1286
00:56:28.551 --> 00:56:30.686
[Jack]<i> This being</i>
<i>the fourth reunion,</i>

1287
00:56:30.720 --> 00:56:32.421
the other three
I just couldn't make it

1288
00:56:32.455 --> 00:56:34.323
or financial stuff.

1289
00:56:34.357 --> 00:56:36.325
I come from a family where...

1290
00:56:36.359 --> 00:56:37.993
flying a plane is a big deal

1291
00:56:38.027 --> 00:56:39.661
and just the fact
that my parents

1292
00:56:39.696 --> 00:56:42.431
were willing to spend
that money and get me out here

1293
00:56:42.465 --> 00:56:44.400
<i>and be able to meet
all these people,</i>

1294
00:56:44.434 --> 00:56:45.934
<i>hit me really hard on the plane.</i>

1295
00:56:45.969 --> 00:56:48.337
<i>I was just like, "Oh, wow."</i>

1296
00:56:48.371 --> 00:56:52.775
It was just all excitement,
and it's still all excitement.

1297
00:56:52.809 --> 00:56:54.176
[Bradley]<i> I've known about</i>
<i>my siblings</i>

1298
00:56:54.210 --> 00:56:56.412
<i>for almost like
two or three years now.</i>

1299
00:56:56.446 --> 00:56:57.813
<i>At first I was a bit nervous</i>

1300
00:56:57.847 --> 00:56:59.515
<i>about like finding out
about them.</i>

1301
00:56:59.549 --> 00:57:01.316
<i>I'm not really
like a people person,</i>

1302
00:57:01.351 --> 00:57:05.220
but here it's a lot easier
to get know like each other

1303
00:57:05.255 --> 00:57:07.756
and I was a lot less nervous
because I can actually, like,

1304
00:57:07.791 --> 00:57:09.992
you know, pinpoint things
that we had in common,

1305
00:57:10.026 --> 00:57:12.161
rather than like talking
on the phone for like a week

1306
00:57:12.195 --> 00:57:13.262
and still being nervous.

1307
00:57:15.432 --> 00:57:18.400
[guitar music playing]

1308
00:57:19.602 --> 00:57:22.604
[indistinct chatter]

1309
00:57:54.204 --> 00:57:55.471
[Alexis]<i> Yesterday,</i>
<i>all the siblings</i>

1310
00:57:55.505 --> 00:57:56.839
<i>slept at the big house.</i>

1311
00:57:56.873 --> 00:57:58.006
[Lily]<i> Yeah. That was awesome.</i>

1312
00:57:58.041 --> 00:57:59.741
Yeah, we stayed up all night.

1313
00:57:59.776 --> 00:58:00.943
Stayed up until 5:00

1314
00:58:00.977 --> 00:58:02.611
and then woke up at like 9:30.

1315
00:58:02.645 --> 00:58:04.980
[Lily] Some others didn't...

1316
00:58:05.014 --> 00:58:07.316
I don't know
who that was, though.

1317
00:58:08.651 --> 00:58:10.452
Also, it's kind of random,

1318
00:58:10.487 --> 00:58:12.788
but don't you guys feel
like you have these mannerisms

1319
00:58:12.822 --> 00:58:14.456
like stuck in the back
of your head, and, like,

1320
00:58:14.491 --> 00:58:15.891
you just don't feel
comfortable doing them

1321
00:58:15.925 --> 00:58:18.293
in, like, real world
or at your school,

1322
00:58:18.328 --> 00:58:19.995
and because you're with
all your siblings,

1323
00:58:20.029 --> 00:58:21.830
- like, let them loose?
- [Alexis] Yeah.

1324
00:58:21.865 --> 00:58:23.265
Like you didn't even know
you had it in you.

1325
00:58:23.333 --> 00:58:24.433
- [Alexis] Yeah.
- [Lily] Yeah.

1326
00:58:24.467 --> 00:58:26.635
[Alexis] No, that's true.

1327
00:58:26.669 --> 00:58:28.070
I'm really... I'm really shy
at school.

1328
00:58:28.104 --> 00:58:29.438
A spaz.

1329
00:58:29.472 --> 00:58:32.074
Last reunion,
I walked into the room

1330
00:58:32.108 --> 00:58:34.243
and I had really nothing
to compare it to,

1331
00:58:34.277 --> 00:58:36.879
so I wasn't... Honestly,
I wasn't disappointed.

1332
00:58:36.913 --> 00:58:39.715
But now that I have
something compare it to,

1333
00:58:39.749 --> 00:58:44.720
this reunion, it's like, wow.
That it's truly different.

1334
00:58:44.754 --> 00:58:47.289
<i>This reunion
has really blown my mind</i>

1335
00:58:47.323 --> 00:58:48.957
<i>and just the things we do</i>

1336
00:58:48.992 --> 00:58:52.294
<i>and how fast
we warmed up to each other</i>

1337
00:58:52.328 --> 00:58:53.996
is actually incredible.

1338
00:58:54.030 --> 00:58:55.898
I've never seen
anything like it.

1339
00:58:55.932 --> 00:58:58.634
<i>And I think the reason that
we connect so much quicker</i>

1340
00:58:58.668 --> 00:59:00.302
<i>is because...</i>

1341
00:59:00.336 --> 00:59:02.271
<i>one, because obviously
we share the same father,</i>

1342
00:59:02.305 --> 00:59:04.206
<i>but I think it's so much
more than that.</i>

1343
00:59:04.240 --> 00:59:05.974
We're talking about...
Yesterday about this

1344
00:59:06.009 --> 00:59:09.144
and it's kind of just
that we've been brought up

1345
00:59:09.178 --> 00:59:10.946
with this mystery in our lives

1346
00:59:10.980 --> 00:59:13.482
<i>and having that mystery
in your life</i>

1347
00:59:13.516 --> 00:59:16.518
<i>and that driving curiosity
to find it, but you can't.</i>

1348
00:59:16.553 --> 00:59:19.154
So when you find
a piece of it...

1349
00:59:19.188 --> 00:59:21.156
Well, 22 pieces of it,

1350
00:59:21.190 --> 00:59:23.292
then it's like
I need to put these together

1351
00:59:23.326 --> 00:59:26.728
and it's so exciting
and it's very surreal,

1352
00:59:26.763 --> 00:59:28.530
but I love it.

1353
00:59:29.966 --> 00:59:31.533
[Sadie] We're gonna play
the audio tape we have.

1354
00:59:31.568 --> 00:59:32.968
- [woman] Ready, guys?
- [Sadie] Bradley

1355
00:59:33.002 --> 00:59:34.269
Apparently they can hear it
from there,

1356
00:59:34.304 --> 00:59:36.038
so, it's pretty wild.

1357
00:59:36.072 --> 00:59:38.340
[woman]<i> This is the audio tape</i>
<i>of donor 5114.</i>

1358
00:59:38.374 --> 00:59:42.511
<i>Today's date
is October 23rd, 1996.</i>

1359
00:59:42.545 --> 00:59:45.514
[man]<i> Hello.</i>
<i>My donor number is 5114.</i>

1360
00:59:45.548 --> 00:59:48.116
<i>I'm six-feet one inch tall.</i>

1361
00:59:48.151 --> 00:59:51.520
<i>I have a medium build.</i>

1362
00:59:51.554 --> 00:59:55.157
<i>I have straight brown hair
and brown eyes.</i>

1363
00:59:55.191 --> 00:59:59.728
<i>My skin color is slightly
olive, and I tan easily.</i>

1364
00:59:59.762 --> 01:00:01.363
<i>I have full lips</i>

1365
01:00:01.397 --> 01:00:03.999
<i>and normally an athletic build,</i>

1366
01:00:04.033 --> 01:00:05.867
<i>like when I work out,</i>

1367
01:00:05.902 --> 01:00:07.502
<i>I seem to get
results quickly, but...</i>

1368
01:00:07.537 --> 01:00:09.938
[laughs]

1369
01:00:09.973 --> 01:00:14.810
[man]<i> My mother originates</i>
<i>from Germany and England</i>

1370
01:00:14.844 --> 01:00:17.713
<i>and my father originates
from Germany.</i>

1371
01:00:17.747 --> 01:00:20.949
<i>At home, they say
that I'm most like my father.</i>

1372
01:00:20.984 --> 01:00:22.884
<i>I see both of them in me,
actually.</i>

1373
01:00:22.919 --> 01:00:24.186
[woman]<i> And how is that</i>
<i>that you're most</i>

1374
01:00:24.220 --> 01:00:25.787
<i>like your father they say?</i>

1375
01:00:25.822 --> 01:00:28.056
[man]<i> My father really</i>
<i>has tunnel vision</i>

1376
01:00:28.091 --> 01:00:29.691
<i>when it comes to doing things.</i>

1377
01:00:29.726 --> 01:00:33.729
<i>And so I seem to have focus
similar to his.</i>

1378
01:00:33.763 --> 01:00:36.732
[woman]<i> And what would do if</i>
<i>you had more time or money?</i>

1379
01:00:36.766 --> 01:00:39.768
<i>I would learn to play
an instrument well.</i>

1380
01:00:39.802 --> 01:00:41.703
<i>I've picked up
the guitar a few times,</i>

1381
01:00:41.738 --> 01:00:45.807
<i>but I haven't had time
to really learn it well.</i>

1382
01:00:45.842 --> 01:00:47.275
[Sadie] Was that your
first time hearing it?

1383
01:00:47.310 --> 01:00:48.877
[Jack] No. I've heard it before

1384
01:00:48.911 --> 01:00:50.445
but it was like
really crappy audio.

1385
01:00:50.480 --> 01:00:51.880
- Oh, okay.
- Because I think someone

1386
01:00:51.914 --> 01:00:54.349
like recorded it
on their phone and sent to me.

1387
01:00:54.384 --> 01:00:55.684
[Alexis] That was...
I think that was me.

1388
01:00:55.718 --> 01:00:56.952
I think that was you. But I...

1389
01:00:56.986 --> 01:00:58.520
Like I could barely even hear it

1390
01:00:58.554 --> 01:01:00.722
and I just heard,
"I wish them all the luck."

1391
01:01:00.757 --> 01:01:02.457
That's all I heard. But...

1392
01:01:02.492 --> 01:01:04.559
It's like every time I listen
to it with another sibling

1393
01:01:04.594 --> 01:01:06.228
it's a little different
because you can just

1394
01:01:06.262 --> 01:01:08.930
connect it... Just...
You can connect things more.

1395
01:01:08.965 --> 01:01:11.166
To me, it just sounds
really like familiar,

1396
01:01:11.200 --> 01:01:12.334
like we know him from somewhere

1397
01:01:12.368 --> 01:01:14.169
- but, like where?
- Yeah.

1398
01:01:14.203 --> 01:01:16.838
The first time I heard it,
it kind of like freaked me out

1399
01:01:16.873 --> 01:01:18.674
a little bit, but it didn't...

1400
01:01:18.708 --> 01:01:19.775
[Jack] He just sounds like

1401
01:01:19.809 --> 01:01:21.610
- Nick so much.
- Yeah.

1402
01:01:21.644 --> 01:01:23.412
He's got a really nice
voice like it's just...

1403
01:01:23.446 --> 01:01:25.514
Like, you know, how certain
people like with those voices,

1404
01:01:25.548 --> 01:01:26.848
so it's like,
it just soothes you

1405
01:01:26.883 --> 01:01:28.517
- to hear it.
- [Alexis] Yeah.

1406
01:01:28.551 --> 01:01:30.419
What I don't get is, like,
how there can be one dude

1407
01:01:30.486 --> 01:01:32.688
- that looks like all of us.
- [Neylan] Mmm-hmm.

1408
01:01:32.722 --> 01:01:34.389
Because sometimes
you see someone with their mom

1409
01:01:34.424 --> 01:01:36.091
and you're like, oh, God.
They look so much like them.

1410
01:01:36.125 --> 01:01:37.526
And then you see
their dad, and you're like,

1411
01:01:37.560 --> 01:01:38.794
they look like them, too,
like a lot.

1412
01:01:38.828 --> 01:01:40.128
- [Alexis] What? Yeah.
- [Jack] Mmm-hmm.

1413
01:01:40.163 --> 01:01:43.165
[whimsical music playing]

1414
01:01:47.437 --> 01:01:50.405
[Nancy] So we have seven kids
born in 1998,

1415
01:01:50.440 --> 01:01:52.407
six in 1999,

1416
01:01:52.442 --> 01:01:55.544
and then there's sort
of a fallow period for 2000,

1417
01:01:55.578 --> 01:01:57.846
and then two in 2001,

1418
01:01:57.880 --> 01:02:01.083
and then Zeke was born in 2004,

1419
01:02:01.117 --> 01:02:05.420
and then we have
baby Grayson 2014.

1420
01:02:05.455 --> 01:02:07.122
[Jack] That's a big gap

1421
01:02:07.156 --> 01:02:10.192
between like Mattie and Grayson.

1422
01:02:10.226 --> 01:02:11.827
[Mattie]<i> My 18th birthday</i>
<i>is coming up</i>

1423
01:02:11.861 --> 01:02:14.496
and I feel like there's a lot
of the younger siblings

1424
01:02:14.530 --> 01:02:16.932
way more interested in finding
the donor than I am,

1425
01:02:16.966 --> 01:02:20.268
<i>but I am gonna definitely, like,</i>

1426
01:02:20.303 --> 01:02:22.070
<i>contact the Cryobank
and, like, request</i>

1427
01:02:22.105 --> 01:02:24.406
<i>for a picture and, like,
contact and stuff,</i>

1428
01:02:24.440 --> 01:02:27.142
but I just kind of want to see
what they'll say.

1429
01:02:27.176 --> 01:02:29.745
I won't necessarily, like,

1430
01:02:29.779 --> 01:02:32.013
want to go meet him
if he does wanna meet.

1431
01:02:32.048 --> 01:02:34.649
But I feel, like,
just so they could like know,

1432
01:02:34.684 --> 01:02:36.818
like whenever they turn 18,

1433
01:02:36.853 --> 01:02:40.822
if he'll wanna, like,
meet them and stuff.

1434
01:02:40.857 --> 01:02:44.326
[dramatic music playing]

1435
01:02:46.329 --> 01:02:47.763
[Nancy]<i> You know,</i>
<i>you try to kind of wonder</i>

1436
01:02:47.797 --> 01:02:49.598
<i>what his life is like now.</i>

1437
01:02:49.632 --> 01:02:51.166
I mean, he donated for you guys

1438
01:02:51.200 --> 01:02:55.270
like 20, 18, 19, 17 years ago.

1439
01:02:55.304 --> 01:02:57.405
And he was in his late 20s then,

1440
01:02:57.440 --> 01:03:00.342
so he's probably
in his mid-40s now.

1441
01:03:00.376 --> 01:03:02.544
And, you know,
think about how different

1442
01:03:02.578 --> 01:03:04.613
your life is gonna be
in 20 years.

1443
01:03:04.680 --> 01:03:08.416
And I'm willing to bet
that, when he donated,

1444
01:03:08.451 --> 01:03:13.088
he didn't fully
appreciate what he was doing,

1445
01:03:13.122 --> 01:03:15.157
that he didn't understand
that he was helping

1446
01:03:15.191 --> 01:03:17.159
to create all of you.

1447
01:03:17.193 --> 01:03:18.827
[Alexis] He obviously
has the right to his privacy.

1448
01:03:18.861 --> 01:03:20.695
But I mean I also think
we have the right

1449
01:03:20.730 --> 01:03:22.164
to at least some information

1450
01:03:22.198 --> 01:03:24.699
and, like, at least
more than we have now

1451
01:03:24.734 --> 01:03:26.868
and then what he...
When he donated,

1452
01:03:26.903 --> 01:03:30.138
he, like, should have
considered the future

1453
01:03:30.173 --> 01:03:32.140
and what he was gonna
be like in 20 years.

1454
01:03:32.175 --> 01:03:33.542
I'm not saying that
it's not right to ask

1455
01:03:33.576 --> 01:03:35.243
or it's not ask right to...

1456
01:03:35.278 --> 01:03:39.314
I mean, I would like to know
some things too, you know.

1457
01:03:39.348 --> 01:03:43.151
It's just, you know,
sometimes what we feel like

1458
01:03:43.186 --> 01:03:45.187
he needs to do,
he may not think that.

1459
01:03:45.221 --> 01:03:48.690
He may not even have this
as a priority.

1460
01:03:48.724 --> 01:03:51.326
[Lily] I feel like I'd want a
mystery

1461
01:03:51.360 --> 01:03:54.930
more than I'd want
an unfulfilled,

1462
01:03:54.964 --> 01:03:57.532
- like void in my...
- Yeah. Me too.

1463
01:03:57.567 --> 01:04:00.969
And I'm like more interested
in, like, sibling stuff

1464
01:04:01.003 --> 01:04:05.207
than like dad stuff,
like I don't...

1465
01:04:05.241 --> 01:04:08.210
I've never, like, wanted
to really meet him.

1466
01:04:08.244 --> 01:04:10.212
I just wanna, like,
know what he looks like.

1467
01:04:10.246 --> 01:04:12.814
[Johnny] For me, at least,
I'm in it for you guys.

1468
01:04:12.849 --> 01:04:16.318
I've talked hours on end
with you guys

1469
01:04:16.352 --> 01:04:18.787
and I see myself
in you guys, you know?

1470
01:04:18.821 --> 01:04:22.224
[Danny] The most main reason
that we are here

1471
01:04:22.258 --> 01:04:25.393
every year meeting each other
is not to find the donor

1472
01:04:25.428 --> 01:04:26.661
but it's to be with each other,

1473
01:04:26.696 --> 01:04:28.763
because the connection
we've grown

1474
01:04:28.798 --> 01:04:31.132
is probably stronger than any
connection you could find,

1475
01:04:31.167 --> 01:04:34.814
so I'm satisfied
with having what we have here

1476
01:04:34.838 --> 01:04:36.605
because what we have here
is amazing.

1477
01:04:36.639 --> 01:04:38.607
[Alexis] And I'm realizing
that more and more

1478
01:04:38.641 --> 01:04:41.076
as time passes by, like I...

1479
01:04:41.110 --> 01:04:43.245
Even though it's kind of hard
to picture my life

1480
01:04:43.279 --> 01:04:45.614
without ever knowing
who the donor is, I can do it

1481
01:04:45.648 --> 01:04:47.883
but I cannot picture my life

1482
01:04:47.917 --> 01:04:51.319
without any of my siblings,
like, it's impossible.

1483
01:04:51.354 --> 01:04:54.356
[whimsical music playing]

1484
01:04:57.026 --> 01:04:59.227
[Danny] The trip was really,
really fun.

1485
01:04:59.262 --> 01:05:01.496
I definitely feel like
I've, like, connected

1486
01:05:01.530 --> 01:05:03.665
with the siblings
on like a whole new level

1487
01:05:03.733 --> 01:05:06.201
and we've all opened up
about more things

1488
01:05:06.235 --> 01:05:11.039
and more experiences
that we can all relate to.

1489
01:05:11.073 --> 01:05:13.541
[Mattie]<i> This trip, I learned</i>
<i>we all, like, struggle</i>

1490
01:05:13.576 --> 01:05:15.377
<i>with the same stuff emotionally,</i>

1491
01:05:15.411 --> 01:05:17.679
and that's, like, really cool
to know that we're, like,

1492
01:05:17.713 --> 01:05:19.614
all going through
the same stuff.

1493
01:05:19.649 --> 01:05:21.149
<i>It's gonna, like, suck,
like, leaving,</i>

1494
01:05:21.183 --> 01:05:22.884
<i>like I've already cried,</i>

1495
01:05:22.919 --> 01:05:25.387
I'm just gonna miss
everyone so much.

1496
01:05:29.892 --> 01:05:32.327
[Danny]<i> It never gets easier</i>
<i>to pack up and leave</i>

1497
01:05:32.361 --> 01:05:34.195
<i>just because with each meet-up,</i>

1498
01:05:34.230 --> 01:05:36.865
<i>you get closer and closer
with every sibling</i>

1499
01:05:36.899 --> 01:05:38.934
<i>and it's just harder to go.</i>

1500
01:05:38.968 --> 01:05:40.335
<i>Almost feels like</i>

1501
01:05:40.369 --> 01:05:43.471
it's just, like,
our right to be together,

1502
01:05:43.506 --> 01:05:45.173
I don't know.

1503
01:05:45.207 --> 01:05:48.209
[whimsical music playing]

1504
01:05:53.716 --> 01:05:55.150
[Brandy]<i> On the way home</i>
<i>from Breckenridge,</i>

1505
01:05:55.184 --> 01:05:57.352
<i>we had a hard time because</i>

1506
01:05:57.386 --> 01:05:59.854
Daniel just had a meltdown
and cried a lot

1507
01:05:59.889 --> 01:06:03.458
and he was yelling a lot
and we were yelling a lot

1508
01:06:03.492 --> 01:06:06.094
and just...
I think there was just this

1509
01:06:06.128 --> 01:06:08.797
sense of disconnect

1510
01:06:08.831 --> 01:06:11.866
and, you know, he was saying
that, you know,

1511
01:06:11.901 --> 01:06:15.737
he just doesn't think
that we'll ever understand

1512
01:06:15.771 --> 01:06:20.108
how he feels and how important
everybody is to him

1513
01:06:20.142 --> 01:06:22.277
to the point of making us

1514
01:06:22.311 --> 01:06:25.580
feel kind of like we didn't
matter as much to him.

1515
01:06:25.614 --> 01:06:29.751
When we came back
from Breckenridge,

1516
01:06:29.785 --> 01:06:32.187
Daniel decided to go see
his grandparents

1517
01:06:32.221 --> 01:06:34.122
and my ex in Clovis.

1518
01:06:34.156 --> 01:06:39.127
And...

1519
01:06:39.161 --> 01:06:41.496
he just went to go spend
some time with her.

1520
01:06:47.036 --> 01:06:48.536
[Danny]<i> After Breckenridge,</i>

1521
01:06:48.571 --> 01:06:50.538
<i>I definitely felt like
I found a lot of myself</i>

1522
01:06:50.573 --> 01:06:52.674
<i>during that meet-up
and I just came home</i>

1523
01:06:52.708 --> 01:06:55.276
<i>and I kind of felt like
that Albuquerque,</i>

1524
01:06:55.311 --> 01:06:56.845
I was more focused
on being the person

1525
01:06:56.879 --> 01:06:58.046
that people wanted me to be

1526
01:06:58.080 --> 01:06:59.748
and not being the person
I wanted to be.

1527
01:06:59.782 --> 01:07:01.983
<i>And so I decided to go ahead</i>

1528
01:07:02.018 --> 01:07:06.621
<i>and move down to Clovis
with my other mom.</i>

1529
01:07:06.655 --> 01:07:09.824
[Brandy]<i> She's not been</i>
<i>a really big part of his life</i>

1530
01:07:09.859 --> 01:07:11.659
and it's not something
I'm excited about

1531
01:07:11.694 --> 01:07:13.428
or that I want.

1532
01:07:13.462 --> 01:07:15.363
<i>But he wants to get to know her</i>

1533
01:07:15.398 --> 01:07:17.265
<i>and I didn't fight it.</i>

1534
01:07:17.333 --> 01:07:19.734
<i>Legally, I could fight it
and he could be here with me,</i>

1535
01:07:19.769 --> 01:07:22.604
but there's just
this disconnect with him.

1536
01:07:22.638 --> 01:07:24.406
And so I don't wanna push it

1537
01:07:24.440 --> 01:07:26.274
because I don't wanna
push him away.

1538
01:07:29.011 --> 01:07:31.079
[Danny]<i> I kind of feel like</i>
<i>my moms took this whole move</i>

1539
01:07:31.113 --> 01:07:32.847
<i>a little too personal</i>

1540
01:07:32.882 --> 01:07:35.250
<i>and made it more about them
than they should have</i>

1541
01:07:35.284 --> 01:07:37.652
because it wasn't necessarily

1542
01:07:37.686 --> 01:07:39.354
about them at all,
with this whole move.

1543
01:07:39.388 --> 01:07:40.955
It was more about me

1544
01:07:40.990 --> 01:07:42.190
and ever since the time
I was five,

1545
01:07:42.224 --> 01:07:43.858
I had always been the older one

1546
01:07:43.893 --> 01:07:45.427
looking after all the kids.

1547
01:07:45.461 --> 01:07:46.995
So it's nice to only, like,

1548
01:07:47.029 --> 01:07:49.798
be responsible
for myself for once.

1549
01:07:52.201 --> 01:07:53.935
[Brandy]<i> He doesn't confide</i>
<i>in me anymore</i>

1550
01:07:53.969 --> 01:07:56.004
<i>and I know a lot of it
is the teenage stuff.</i>

1551
01:07:56.038 --> 01:07:59.407
<i>And I know he's growing
and he's becoming independent.</i>

1552
01:07:59.442 --> 01:08:02.677
But it really feels like
my heart's broken.

1553
01:08:02.711 --> 01:08:05.613
I just... I just want
some more time with him.

1554
01:08:07.416 --> 01:08:09.717
[Francesca]<i> Even though</i>
<i>we know we're good parents</i>

1555
01:08:09.752 --> 01:08:11.586
<i>and we know we're doing
all that we can,</i>

1556
01:08:11.620 --> 01:08:13.688
<i>it just makes you
question, like,</i>

1557
01:08:13.722 --> 01:08:15.390
<i>what did I do wrong?</i>

1558
01:08:15.424 --> 01:08:17.692
Maybe if he wouldn't have had

1559
01:08:17.726 --> 01:08:21.229
so much of the sibling
family unit,

1560
01:08:21.263 --> 01:08:23.932
you know, what he have pulled
away from us like he is.

1561
01:08:23.966 --> 01:08:27.001
<i>And I think that's what's
kind of making us</i>

1562
01:08:27.036 --> 01:08:28.636
<i>regret our decision a little bit</i>

1563
01:08:28.671 --> 01:08:30.805
<i>to foster the connections</i>

1564
01:08:30.840 --> 01:08:33.575
between the siblings and Daniel.

1565
01:08:45.921 --> 01:08:47.722
[woman] Are you excited
about being 18?

1566
01:08:47.756 --> 01:08:49.491
[Mattie] Yes, I am.

1567
01:08:49.525 --> 01:08:51.259
Ever since I can remember,

1568
01:08:51.293 --> 01:08:54.863
like, whenever we, like, found
the siblings and everything,

1569
01:08:54.897 --> 01:08:57.465
I would always feel like,
"Oh, yeah, I'm the oldest."

1570
01:08:57.533 --> 01:08:59.667
It was always so, like,
distant in the future

1571
01:08:59.702 --> 01:09:01.536
and I wasn't, like, thinking,

1572
01:09:01.570 --> 01:09:04.405
"Oh, like, this will
actually happen someday."

1573
01:09:04.440 --> 01:09:07.575
[woman] So if you're thinking
that if you were the only one

1574
01:09:07.610 --> 01:09:09.944
and you might not really
have so much interest

1575
01:09:09.979 --> 01:09:12.380
in contacting the Cryobank,

1576
01:09:12.414 --> 01:09:15.550
are you feeling pressure
because people are coming?

1577
01:09:15.584 --> 01:09:18.486
Yeah, I know that they're all,
like, expecting it

1578
01:09:18.521 --> 01:09:23.158
and I'm like 95% sure
I'll probably call Latrice.

1579
01:09:23.192 --> 01:09:26.327
But you would be fine
with maybe just a picture?

1580
01:09:26.362 --> 01:09:28.897
- [Mattie] Yeah.
- That would be interesting.

1581
01:09:28.931 --> 01:09:30.732
- [Mattie] If he's ugly...
- What if you get it? Yeah.

1582
01:09:30.766 --> 01:09:32.901
What if you get it
and he's ugly,

1583
01:09:32.935 --> 01:09:36.437
- "how would that go?"
- That would be interesting.

1584
01:09:36.472 --> 01:09:39.941
[whimsical music playing]

1585
01:09:39.975 --> 01:09:41.342
- [Mattie] Hi.
- Hi.

1586
01:09:43.479 --> 01:09:44.379
- [Mattie] Hi.
- [Julia] Hi.

1587
01:09:44.413 --> 01:09:45.980
[Mattie] How are you?

1588
01:09:46.015 --> 01:09:48.383
Hi, nice to meet you.

1589
01:09:48.417 --> 01:09:51.419
[upbeat music playing]

1590
01:10:06.802 --> 01:10:08.736
[laughs]

1591
01:10:08.771 --> 01:10:13.474
[all]<i> âª Happy birthday To you âª</i>

1592
01:10:13.509 --> 01:10:18.079
<i>âª Happy birthday to you âª</i>

1593
01:10:18.113 --> 01:10:23.484
<i>âª Happy birthday, Dear Mattie âª</i>

1594
01:10:23.519 --> 01:10:28.289
<i>âª Happy birthday to you âª</i>

1595
01:10:28.324 --> 01:10:29.924
[cheering]

1596
01:10:29.959 --> 01:10:32.293
-[woman] Watch your hair,
-Watch your hair.

1597
01:10:32.328 --> 01:10:33.962
[cheering]

1598
01:10:33.996 --> 01:10:35.463
[laughter]

1599
01:10:35.497 --> 01:10:37.532
- [man] Go, go, go, go.
- [woman] Blow it out.

1600
01:10:37.566 --> 01:10:39.100
[screams]

1601
01:10:39.134 --> 01:10:41.269
[woman] What happened?

1602
01:10:41.303 --> 01:10:43.104
- [man] Oh my God.
- [woman] Oh my God.

1603
01:10:43.138 --> 01:10:46.541
[cheering]

1604
01:10:46.575 --> 01:10:49.577
[phone rings]

1605
01:10:54.083 --> 01:10:55.383
[Mattie]<i> Hello.</i>

1606
01:10:55.417 --> 01:10:56.784
[Latrice]<i> Hello,</i>
<i>this is Latrice.</i>

1607
01:10:56.819 --> 01:10:58.453
Hi, Latrice,
this is Mattie Overmeyer

1608
01:10:58.487 --> 01:11:00.288
from 5114.

1609
01:11:00.322 --> 01:11:02.857
I just turned 18
and I was just wondering,

1610
01:11:02.891 --> 01:11:04.692
like, about contacting the donor

1611
01:11:04.727 --> 01:11:08.040
and, like, the process I had
to go through and everything.

1612
01:11:08.064 --> 01:11:09.964
[Latrice]<i> Oh, okay.</i>
<i>Happy birthday.</i>

1613
01:11:09.999 --> 01:11:12.000
- Thank you.
- [Latrice]<i> Uh, so, basically</i>

1614
01:11:12.034 --> 01:11:14.636
<i>what I have to do
is that I have to put in</i>

1615
01:11:14.670 --> 01:11:17.005
<i>a request to locate the donor,</i>

1616
01:11:17.039 --> 01:11:19.707
<i>um, because the donor
is anonymous,</i>

1617
01:11:19.742 --> 01:11:21.276
<i>it's not guaranteed</i>

1618
01:11:21.310 --> 01:11:24.178
<i>that he will respond
to our enquiries.</i>

1619
01:11:24.213 --> 01:11:27.181
<i>But we will definitely do
our due diligence</i>

1620
01:11:27.216 --> 01:11:29.617
<i>and try to reach out
to him to find out</i>

1621
01:11:29.652 --> 01:11:32.620
<i>how he feels
about communicating.</i>

1622
01:11:32.655 --> 01:11:36.190
<i>So, um, from the time
I turn in the information,</i>

1623
01:11:36.225 --> 01:11:38.993
<i>it can take anywhere between
four to six weeks</i>

1624
01:11:39.028 --> 01:11:40.828
<i>before I get his whereabouts.</i>

1625
01:11:40.863 --> 01:11:44.599
<i>And we generally attempt
at least three times</i>

1626
01:11:44.633 --> 01:11:47.368
<i>and if he doesn't reply
within three attempts,</i>

1627
01:11:47.403 --> 01:11:49.537
<i>then we have to assume
that he doesn't want</i>

1628
01:11:49.571 --> 01:11:51.539
<i>to, um, communicate.</i>

1629
01:11:51.573 --> 01:11:53.007
<i>And at that point,</i>

1630
01:11:53.075 --> 01:11:56.010
<i>we will have to respect
his wishes.</i>

1631
01:11:56.045 --> 01:11:58.212
<i>If you have any additional
questions before I get back</i>

1632
01:11:58.247 --> 01:12:00.381
<i>in contact with you,
Just give me a call.</i>

1633
01:12:00.416 --> 01:12:02.684
<i>Have a wonderful birthday
and I'll talk to you soon.</i>

1634
01:12:02.718 --> 01:12:04.218
Thank you, thank you so much.

1635
01:12:04.253 --> 01:12:06.421
[Latrice]<i> Okay. Bye-bye.</i>

1636
01:12:06.455 --> 01:12:09.123
Kind of surprised me
like during the phone how,

1637
01:12:09.158 --> 01:12:11.793
like, emotional, like,
I kind of felt, like,

1638
01:12:11.827 --> 01:12:13.561
because, you know, like,
no matter what he says,

1639
01:12:13.595 --> 01:12:15.897
it's gonna probably
change our lives forever.

1640
01:12:15.931 --> 01:12:17.432
I don't know. Like we've
been waiting for this

1641
01:12:17.466 --> 01:12:19.233
for so long and like
it's just crazy

1642
01:12:19.268 --> 01:12:21.669
that actually... The time.

1643
01:12:21.737 --> 01:12:22.870
[Mattie] Yeah.

1644
01:12:27.543 --> 01:12:30.244
[Ben] Julia, like, and me,
like, we've always like

1645
01:12:30.279 --> 01:12:32.280
been curious about the dad

1646
01:12:32.314 --> 01:12:33.581
and like what it would be like

1647
01:12:33.615 --> 01:12:35.583
if we had a dad kind of thing.

1648
01:12:35.617 --> 01:12:37.218
We've always been like
lucky to have

1649
01:12:37.252 --> 01:12:38.686
like the moms that we do,

1650
01:12:38.721 --> 01:12:41.055
but like having a dad
would be like different,

1651
01:12:41.090 --> 01:12:44.258
like, we're not like asking
for one, we're just like...

1652
01:12:44.293 --> 01:12:46.427
We just like kind of
wanna know, yeah.

1653
01:12:46.462 --> 01:12:48.596
[Julia] And it's just like

1654
01:12:48.630 --> 01:12:52.033
how you not wanna meet
people you gave life to,

1655
01:12:52.067 --> 01:12:55.370
like how could that not
mean something to you?

1656
01:12:55.404 --> 01:12:57.405
And also I just wonder
like if he has kids

1657
01:12:57.439 --> 01:12:58.706
- because that's like...
- Yeah. Yeah.

1658
01:12:58.741 --> 01:13:00.408
...that could be like
two, three,

1659
01:13:00.442 --> 01:13:02.276
four more half-siblings
that we don't even know about.

1660
01:13:02.311 --> 01:13:04.779
[Julia] Yeah. Probably hard
for them now,

1661
01:13:04.813 --> 01:13:05.780
- because like...
- Yeah.

1662
01:13:05.814 --> 01:13:07.148
...they're his dad.

1663
01:13:07.182 --> 01:13:09.450
Some, like, 20-something
other half-kids

1664
01:13:09.485 --> 01:13:11.018
came in and started
to talk to my dad,

1665
01:13:11.053 --> 01:13:12.587
I'd be like, "Um,
get the hell out of here."

1666
01:13:12.621 --> 01:13:14.255
- I will not be...
- [woman] Yeah.

1667
01:13:14.289 --> 01:13:16.357
I would kind of look like,
I'd be like, "Errr."

1668
01:13:16.392 --> 01:13:18.960
Yeah. There's like
a lot of stuff that, like,

1669
01:13:18.994 --> 01:13:21.329
he has to like factor
and then like

1670
01:13:21.363 --> 01:13:23.208
so many things
that, like, saying yes

1671
01:13:23.232 --> 01:13:25.099
could affect in his life.

1672
01:13:25.134 --> 01:13:27.168
Maybe he's just
as nervous as we are.

1673
01:13:27.202 --> 01:13:30.171
Yeah. Because
I'd be more nervous

1674
01:13:30.205 --> 01:13:31.939
if I were in his situation.

1675
01:13:31.974 --> 01:13:33.908
It's like we have each other.

1676
01:13:33.942 --> 01:13:36.944
He has... Who knows who he has

1677
01:13:36.979 --> 01:13:40.248
to, like, go through
this with, I guess.

1678
01:13:40.282 --> 01:13:43.284
[dramatic music playing]

1679
01:13:50.459 --> 01:13:52.794
[Latrice] "This is
interesting. In 20 years",

1680
01:13:52.828 --> 01:13:54.595
I would like to be
happy with my family

1681
01:13:54.630 --> 01:13:56.364
and free to live life together.

1682
01:13:56.398 --> 01:13:59.801
My goal is to be balanced
physically and mentally.

1683
01:13:59.835 --> 01:14:02.303
Ultimately he would
like to understand

1684
01:14:02.337 --> 01:14:03.971
"the truth of our existence."

1685
01:14:04.006 --> 01:14:05.740
Okay.

1686
01:14:05.774 --> 01:14:08.843
[dramatic music playing]

1687
01:14:10.913 --> 01:14:12.847
Hi, it's Latrice, how are you?

1688
01:14:12.881 --> 01:14:14.248
Good, thank you.

1689
01:14:14.283 --> 01:14:16.350
Wanna let you know
that I have a request

1690
01:14:16.418 --> 01:14:20.822
for a donor location
for a number 5114.

1691
01:14:20.856 --> 01:14:22.390
<i>If we're lucky</i>

1692
01:14:22.424 --> 01:14:24.692
<i>and a donor responds
to our enquiries,</i>

1693
01:14:24.726 --> 01:14:26.427
<i>it can go two ways.</i>

1694
01:14:26.462 --> 01:14:27.929
<i>The donor will either agree</i>

1695
01:14:27.963 --> 01:14:29.197
<i>or he won't agree.</i>

1696
01:14:29.231 --> 01:14:30.832
<i>The hard part for me</i>

1697
01:14:30.866 --> 01:14:32.811
<i>is contacting the offspring</i>

1698
01:14:32.835 --> 01:14:34.402
<i>to let them know
that he doesn't want</i>

1699
01:14:34.436 --> 01:14:36.537
<i>to participate in communicating.</i>

1700
01:14:36.572 --> 01:14:41.008
I try to deliver
the blow as passionately

1701
01:14:41.042 --> 01:14:43.244
and, you know, empathetic

1702
01:14:43.278 --> 01:14:46.247
and sympathetically
as I possibly can

1703
01:14:46.281 --> 01:14:49.250
because the offsprings
are anticipating

1704
01:14:49.284 --> 01:14:51.385
there's some hope that,
you know,

1705
01:14:51.420 --> 01:14:53.821
we've reached out to this guy,
he's responded,

1706
01:14:53.856 --> 01:14:56.224
but then he doesn't
wanna participate.

1707
01:14:56.258 --> 01:14:57.692
Once a donor says no,

1708
01:14:57.726 --> 01:14:59.594
we have to, you know,
accept that

1709
01:14:59.628 --> 01:15:01.662
and move on and it's just...

1710
01:15:01.697 --> 01:15:03.064
It's devastating to have

1711
01:15:03.098 --> 01:15:06.300
to make that phone call
to the offsprings.

1712
01:15:06.335 --> 01:15:09.337
[dramatic music playing]

1713
01:15:11.773 --> 01:15:14.275
[Mattie]<i> A lot of the siblings</i>
<i>once they found out</i>

1714
01:15:14.309 --> 01:15:18.246
that I was getting
the call today, um,

1715
01:15:18.280 --> 01:15:20.715
like Danny started crying
at school and had to,

1716
01:15:20.749 --> 01:15:22.650
like, go home and a lot of them

1717
01:15:22.684 --> 01:15:25.052
were just like freaking out
and so was I.

1718
01:15:25.087 --> 01:15:26.888
It was like...

1719
01:15:26.922 --> 01:15:28.890
It's just like super anxious

1720
01:15:28.924 --> 01:15:31.792
and like...
And she's calling me.

1721
01:15:31.827 --> 01:15:33.327
Okay.

1722
01:15:36.965 --> 01:15:38.733
Hello.

1723
01:15:38.767 --> 01:15:40.568
[Latrice]<i> Hi,</i>
<i>may I speak to Mattie?</i>

1724
01:15:40.602 --> 01:15:42.770
Hi, how are you?

1725
01:15:42.804 --> 01:15:44.438
[Latrice]<i> Hi, Mattie,</i>
<i>it's Latrice Allen</i>

1726
01:15:44.473 --> 01:15:46.641
<i>from the Cryobank.
I'm good, how are you?</i>

1727
01:15:46.675 --> 01:15:49.110
- I'm good.
- [Latrice]<i> Good.</i>

1728
01:15:49.144 --> 01:15:50.578
<i>Well, I want to give you a call</i>

1729
01:15:50.646 --> 01:15:52.580
<i>to give you an update,</i>

1730
01:15:52.614 --> 01:15:55.883
<i>um, I did speak with the donor.</i>

1731
01:15:55.918 --> 01:16:01.722
<i>The bottom line is that
he is willing to communicate,</i>

1732
01:16:01.757 --> 01:16:05.126
<i>um, anonymously facilitated
through me.</i>

1733
01:16:05.160 --> 01:16:09.730
<i>He needs a little bit
more time to iron out</i>

1734
01:16:09.765 --> 01:16:12.500
<i>whatever the thought process
needs to be.</i>

1735
01:16:12.534 --> 01:16:15.213
<i>So he says it's not a problem</i>

1736
01:16:15.237 --> 01:16:16.804
<i>if it's gonna happen,</i>

1737
01:16:16.838 --> 01:16:18.940
<i>but the issue is just
when it's gonna happen</i>

1738
01:16:18.974 --> 01:16:22.143
<i>because he needs to make sure
that he's 100% comfortable</i>

1739
01:16:22.177 --> 01:16:24.312
<i>that his family
will be protected</i>

1740
01:16:24.346 --> 01:16:26.547
<i>once he starts to communicate.</i>

1741
01:16:26.582 --> 01:16:29.317
Okay. Wow.

1742
01:16:29.351 --> 01:16:30.451
[Latrice] <i>And then if you have</i>

1743
01:16:30.485 --> 01:16:32.353
<i>specific questions for him,</i>

1744
01:16:32.387 --> 01:16:34.622
<i>depending on the confidentiality</i>

1745
01:16:34.656 --> 01:16:36.457
<i>of the questions, he will answer</i>

1746
01:16:36.491 --> 01:16:38.392
<i>whatever he's comfortable
with answering</i>

1747
01:16:38.427 --> 01:16:41.562
<i>and then, you know,
give you a bio of himself.</i>

1748
01:16:41.597 --> 01:16:43.364
I don't know if you're
allowed to tell me this,

1749
01:16:43.398 --> 01:16:45.499
but so he does like have

1750
01:16:45.534 --> 01:16:47.435
his own like family
and everything?

1751
01:16:47.469 --> 01:16:48.436
Like does he have his own kids?

1752
01:16:48.470 --> 01:16:50.304
[Latrice]<i> Yes, he does.</i>

1753
01:16:50.339 --> 01:16:51.806
<i>Yes, he does.</i>

1754
01:16:51.840 --> 01:16:53.941
Do you know how many there are?

1755
01:16:53.976 --> 01:16:55.042
[Latrice]<i> I do, but I'd have to</i>

1756
01:16:55.077 --> 01:16:56.210
<i>let him let you know that.</i>

1757
01:16:56.244 --> 01:16:57.712
Okay. Thank you so much,

1758
01:16:57.746 --> 01:16:59.880
I can't wait
to hear back from you.

1759
01:16:59.915 --> 01:17:01.682
[Latrice]<i> Okay. No problem,</i>
<i>you're welcome</i>

1760
01:17:01.717 --> 01:17:04.385
<i>- and have a great weekend.</i>
- You too, thank you.

1761
01:17:04.419 --> 01:17:06.954
[Latrice]<i> Okay. All righty.</i>
<i>Bye-bye.</i>

1762
01:17:08.323 --> 01:17:11.025
- What the heck?
- [woman] That's exciting.

1763
01:17:11.059 --> 01:17:12.960
How do you sit with that?

1764
01:17:12.995 --> 01:17:14.295
What did you expect?

1765
01:17:14.329 --> 01:17:16.030
- Is that what you thought?
- Not that.

1766
01:17:16.064 --> 01:17:17.632
[woman] What did you think?

1767
01:17:17.666 --> 01:17:19.100
Did you think he would say no?

1768
01:17:19.134 --> 01:17:20.901
- Yes.
- [woman] You did? Oh.

1769
01:17:20.936 --> 01:17:24.438
[laughs] You were hoping
the easy way out.

1770
01:17:26.241 --> 01:17:28.509
[Mattie] Hello.

1771
01:17:28.543 --> 01:17:29.877
<i>- Hello.
- Hi.</i>

1772
01:17:29.911 --> 01:17:32.079
- [Mattie] Can you hear me?
<i>- Yes.</i>

1773
01:17:32.114 --> 01:17:33.547
<i>- Yes.
- Mmm-hmm.</i>

1774
01:17:33.582 --> 01:17:37.551
[Mattie] Okay.
So, he's alive, good news.

1775
01:17:37.586 --> 01:17:40.421
And he said yes

1776
01:17:40.455 --> 01:17:43.557
to contacting me anonymously

1777
01:17:43.592 --> 01:17:46.527
through the Cryobank,
but he doesn't wanna contact

1778
01:17:46.561 --> 01:17:49.130
from anyone else
who is under the age of 18.

1779
01:17:49.164 --> 01:17:51.699
And he has own family and kids.

1780
01:17:51.733 --> 01:17:54.669
And I'm gonna send him
like a bio of like stuff.

1781
01:17:54.703 --> 01:17:57.038
[woman]<i> So like if he gets</i>
<i>to know you better,</i>

1782
01:17:57.072 --> 01:17:59.040
<i>he might like reveal his name?</i>

1783
01:17:59.074 --> 01:18:00.541
Maybe, I don't know.

1784
01:18:00.575 --> 01:18:02.476
It's gonna be a step at a time.

1785
01:18:02.511 --> 01:18:04.111
[woman]<i> Well, that's good,</i>
<i>it's a good start</i>

1786
01:18:04.146 --> 01:18:06.747
<i>and like whatever
he's comfortable with.</i>

1787
01:18:06.782 --> 01:18:09.350
<i>This is good news though, guys.</i>

1788
01:18:09.384 --> 01:18:11.452
<i>Yeah, I'm excited.</i>

1789
01:18:11.486 --> 01:18:12.920
<i>I didn't have to cry.</i>

1790
01:18:12.954 --> 01:18:14.355
[laughs]

1791
01:18:16.158 --> 01:18:19.160
[dramatic music playing]

1792
01:18:21.396 --> 01:18:24.098
[Mattie] I've always
been telling myself

1793
01:18:24.132 --> 01:18:26.901
that I didn't necessarily care

1794
01:18:26.935 --> 01:18:28.335
<i>about the donor</i>

1795
01:18:28.370 --> 01:18:29.904
<i>and I didn't care about</i>

1796
01:18:29.938 --> 01:18:31.105
<i>what his answer was</i>

1797
01:18:31.139 --> 01:18:32.673
<i>and I didn't wanna meet him.</i>

1798
01:18:32.708 --> 01:18:37.144
<i>And now that I know
that his answer is yes,</i>

1799
01:18:37.179 --> 01:18:38.979
it's kind of scary

1800
01:18:39.014 --> 01:18:41.649
that I let my guard down now

1801
01:18:41.683 --> 01:18:43.451
that he said yes to contact

1802
01:18:43.485 --> 01:18:46.087
because now is the time
that I really,

1803
01:18:46.121 --> 01:18:49.356
like, could get rejected
like as a person,

1804
01:18:49.391 --> 01:18:50.958
like, with him reading my bio

1805
01:18:50.992 --> 01:18:53.160
and like actually
seeing who I am

1806
01:18:53.195 --> 01:18:55.329
and, like,
seeing a picture of me.

1807
01:18:55.363 --> 01:18:58.132
And then if he says like,

1808
01:18:58.166 --> 01:18:59.734
"Stop contacting me,"
or whatever,

1809
01:18:59.768 --> 01:19:02.336
then that would
really be rejection,

1810
01:19:02.370 --> 01:19:05.706
<i>so that's kind of scary.</i>

1811
01:19:05.741 --> 01:19:07.908
[woman]<i> Mattie, has that</i>
<i>protection mechanism in her</i>

1812
01:19:07.943 --> 01:19:10.711
<i>that if she doesn't know
what the answer is gonna be,</i>

1813
01:19:10.746 --> 01:19:13.180
<i>she's gonna protect herself
from that answer.</i>

1814
01:19:13.215 --> 01:19:15.382
<i>And now that she's found out
that he is willing</i>

1815
01:19:15.450 --> 01:19:17.985
<i>to have a connection to them,</i>

1816
01:19:18.019 --> 01:19:21.021
<i>I think she's cautiously
optimistic but excited</i>

1817
01:19:21.056 --> 01:19:23.524
and way more than she ever
dreamed she would be.

1818
01:19:23.558 --> 01:19:26.594
[dramatic music playing]

1819
01:19:34.169 --> 01:19:37.171
[birds chirping]

1820
01:19:42.878 --> 01:19:44.512
[Lorie] <i>I've been excited today,</i>

1821
01:19:44.546 --> 01:19:45.579
<i>I've been nervous,</i>

1822
01:19:45.614 --> 01:19:47.314
<i>I've been crying,</i>

1823
01:19:47.349 --> 01:19:49.150
<i>not sure why.</i>

1824
01:19:49.184 --> 01:19:51.986
<i>Just I guess the enormity
of the whole thing,</i>

1825
01:19:52.020 --> 01:19:53.854
<i>you know, that it's like
finally over,</i>

1826
01:19:53.889 --> 01:19:55.923
<i>that he's coming back.</i>

1827
01:19:55.957 --> 01:19:57.825
He hasn't lived here
in two and a half years

1828
01:19:57.859 --> 01:20:01.195
so that's gonna be kind of
a little nervous

1829
01:20:01.229 --> 01:20:03.931
<i>about just living with him again</i>

1830
01:20:03.965 --> 01:20:07.234
<i>and he's changed so much
and I think I have changed</i>

1831
01:20:07.269 --> 01:20:10.504
<i>and it'll be interesting
to see how that all plays out</i>

1832
01:20:10.539 --> 01:20:13.908
of coming back together again
after two and a half years

1833
01:20:13.942 --> 01:20:16.410
as two different people.

1834
01:20:16.444 --> 01:20:18.579
It's gonna be interesting.

1835
01:20:18.613 --> 01:20:21.615
[dramatic music playing]

1836
01:20:25.220 --> 01:20:27.388
[Lorie]<i> Having decided</i>
<i>that he's coming home,</i>

1837
01:20:27.422 --> 01:20:28.823
<i>I've been, you know,
an empty nester</i>

1838
01:20:28.857 --> 01:20:30.691
<i>for two and a half years,</i>

1839
01:20:30.725 --> 01:20:34.061
<i>and I look at the future,
it's awful nice.</i>

1840
01:20:34.095 --> 01:20:36.197
<i>Really hopeful, you know.</i>

1841
01:20:36.231 --> 01:20:38.699
<i>He's done a lot
of good hard work.</i>

1842
01:20:38.733 --> 01:20:40.801
<i>I wanna see him and know</i>

1843
01:20:40.836 --> 01:20:43.838
<i>that he's not getting back
on another airplane.</i>

1844
01:20:43.872 --> 01:20:45.639
<i>That's the best part.</i>

1845
01:20:45.674 --> 01:20:48.809
<i>Just knowing that he's not
going away again.</i>

1846
01:20:48.844 --> 01:20:50.578
There he is.

1847
01:20:50.612 --> 01:20:54.548
[dramatic music playing]

1848
01:20:54.583 --> 01:20:55.583
[Lorie] How are you doing?

1849
01:20:55.617 --> 01:20:57.518
Where is your stuff?

1850
01:20:57.552 --> 01:20:58.719
[indistinct]

1851
01:20:58.753 --> 01:21:01.121
Oh, how was your flight?

1852
01:21:01.156 --> 01:21:03.257
It's good.

1853
01:21:03.291 --> 01:21:05.259
Back home for good.

1854
01:21:06.661 --> 01:21:08.128
[Nathan]<i> Coming home,</i>

1855
01:21:08.163 --> 01:21:09.830
<i>it doesn't really feel real yet,</i>

1856
01:21:09.865 --> 01:21:11.966
<i>I came back with a lot
more self-confidence</i>

1857
01:21:12.000 --> 01:21:13.400
<i>and definitely patience,</i>

1858
01:21:13.435 --> 01:21:15.135
<i>like, understanding for others.</i>

1859
01:21:15.170 --> 01:21:16.604
I guess it'll probably
hit me sooner

1860
01:21:16.638 --> 01:21:18.205
and when I start like school
and all that,

1861
01:21:18.240 --> 01:21:20.040
that I'm here for good
and I'm really not,

1862
01:21:20.075 --> 01:21:22.576
<i>like, gonna go anywhere else.</i>

1863
01:21:22.611 --> 01:21:24.478
[Lorie] Ooh, what's this?

1864
01:21:24.512 --> 01:21:26.747
[Nathan] Oh, I, like,
put all the pictures in there.

1865
01:21:26.781 --> 01:21:29.583
You made this
out of surgical tape.

1866
01:21:29.618 --> 01:21:32.253
- Mmm-hmm.
- [Lorie] Physically, I mean,

1867
01:21:32.287 --> 01:21:34.221
I sent away a little boy,
you know,

1868
01:21:34.256 --> 01:21:37.057
I sent away
a little scrawny thing

1869
01:21:37.092 --> 01:21:40.995
<i>and they sent me back
this man, you know.</i>

1870
01:21:41.029 --> 01:21:42.930
That's cool to see, you know,

1871
01:21:42.964 --> 01:21:45.432
because I love
who he's becoming, uh, I do.

1872
01:21:45.467 --> 01:21:47.101
He's a good person.

1873
01:21:48.436 --> 01:21:50.437
Oh, how did you get
that picture?

1874
01:21:50.472 --> 01:21:51.872
They sent it to me.

1875
01:21:51.907 --> 01:21:53.307
- [Nathan] Cool.
- [Lorie] So sweet,

1876
01:21:53.341 --> 01:21:56.543
that was Fanny,
that was his dog in school.

1877
01:21:56.578 --> 01:21:57.978
[Nathan]<i> Coming back home,</i>

1878
01:21:58.013 --> 01:21:59.546
<i>I think it's gonna be
a lot easier</i>

1879
01:21:59.581 --> 01:22:02.283
<i>to like use the skills
that I got just to like</i>

1880
01:22:02.317 --> 01:22:04.685
get along with my mom
and like work things out,

1881
01:22:04.719 --> 01:22:06.820
like use communication,
actually get things done.

1882
01:22:06.855 --> 01:22:09.189
<i>There's always gonna
be things in the beginning</i>

1883
01:22:09.224 --> 01:22:10.624
<i>that's still gonna, like,</i>

1884
01:22:10.659 --> 01:22:12.660
take getting used to
but it's just nice

1885
01:22:12.694 --> 01:22:15.496
to like have my freedom
and be able to like

1886
01:22:15.530 --> 01:22:17.731
kind of run my own life
and take some control

1887
01:22:17.766 --> 01:22:19.934
over that,
because it's been awhile.

1888
01:22:19.968 --> 01:22:21.302
[knocks on door]

1889
01:22:24.539 --> 01:22:26.340
- [Neylan] Hi.
- Hey, what's up?

1890
01:22:28.376 --> 01:22:29.810
Hi, Neylan.

1891
01:22:29.844 --> 01:22:31.345
Oh, my gosh,
look how tall you've got.

1892
01:22:31.379 --> 01:22:32.646
I haven't seen you in, like,

1893
01:22:32.681 --> 01:22:34.848
look at you, taller than he is.

1894
01:22:34.883 --> 01:22:35.983
Well, it's been a
long time, so...

1895
01:22:36.017 --> 01:22:36.984
[Lorie] It's been what?

1896
01:22:37.018 --> 01:22:37.985
You haven't seen her since,

1897
01:22:38.019 --> 01:22:39.553
uh, like California, right?

1898
01:22:39.587 --> 01:22:41.555
Mmm-hmm. Like two and a half,
three years.

1899
01:22:41.589 --> 01:22:43.324
[Lorie] Two and a half...
Almost three years. Yeah.

1900
01:22:43.358 --> 01:22:45.326
- Wow.
- [Neylan]<i> There were days</i>

1901
01:22:45.360 --> 01:22:47.127
<i>whenever I'd be
sitting there thinking</i>

1902
01:22:47.162 --> 01:22:49.563
<i>about the siblings
and everything.</i>

1903
01:22:49.597 --> 01:22:51.465
And I just get really
emotional and I was like,

1904
01:22:51.533 --> 01:22:53.033
"I miss Nathan so much."

1905
01:22:53.068 --> 01:22:54.868
And like I'd tell my mom
and she was like,

1906
01:22:54.903 --> 01:22:56.503
"I know you do, Neylan."

1907
01:22:56.538 --> 01:22:58.839
And so I think it was like
really exciting

1908
01:22:58.873 --> 01:23:01.342
for us whenever we heard
that he was coming back.

1909
01:23:01.376 --> 01:23:02.910
<i>Because I think me and him</i>

1910
01:23:02.944 --> 01:23:05.179
<i>like really clicked
whenever we were 13.</i>

1911
01:23:05.213 --> 01:23:06.914
- [Nathan]<i> Yeah.</i>
- [Neylan]<i> So,</i>

1912
01:23:06.948 --> 01:23:09.016
<i>it kind of sucked
not being able to like grow</i>

1913
01:23:09.050 --> 01:23:11.251
<i>on that together
for a few years,</i>

1914
01:23:11.286 --> 01:23:13.754
but like now we can
because he's back

1915
01:23:13.788 --> 01:23:17.224
and we can talk all the time
if we wanted to.

1916
01:23:17.258 --> 01:23:18.625
You don't want a shot
of this one?

1917
01:23:18.660 --> 01:23:21.362
[Nathan] Nice.

1918
01:23:21.396 --> 01:23:22.463
[Neylan]
I'm not sure if everyone

1919
01:23:22.497 --> 01:23:23.731
is gonna get the tattoo,

1920
01:23:23.765 --> 01:23:25.199
I know some of them already have

1921
01:23:25.233 --> 01:23:26.900
but just with the number.

1922
01:23:26.935 --> 01:23:28.736
And they've gotten it
in place where, like,

1923
01:23:28.770 --> 01:23:30.604
it's not very noticeable.

1924
01:23:30.638 --> 01:23:32.239
I don't know, I'd like...
I'd get the tattoo,

1925
01:23:32.273 --> 01:23:34.575
I don't know how much
I'd want the sperm

1926
01:23:34.609 --> 01:23:36.210
floating around on my leg,

1927
01:23:36.244 --> 01:23:39.747
but I'd get the numbers,
it's cool.

1928
01:23:39.781 --> 01:23:41.882
[Neylan] So we found
a new sibling,

1929
01:23:41.916 --> 01:23:44.885
she's from Hawaii,
so that's pretty cool.

1930
01:23:44.919 --> 01:23:46.787
There she is.

1931
01:23:46.821 --> 01:23:51.025
That makes 22 siblings
counting all of us together.

1932
01:23:51.059 --> 01:23:52.559
[Nathan] And she's 17?

1933
01:23:52.594 --> 01:23:54.762
- [Neylan] Yeah.
- [Nathan] Nice.

1934
01:23:54.796 --> 01:23:57.197
[Neylan]<i> I was nervous</i>
<i>to see him again</i>

1935
01:23:57.232 --> 01:23:59.433
because I don't know,
I haven't seen him in forever.

1936
01:23:59.467 --> 01:24:00.968
So I was kind of scared
that it...

1937
01:24:01.002 --> 01:24:02.469
Like, things had changed so much

1938
01:24:02.504 --> 01:24:03.470
that we wouldn't get along

1939
01:24:03.505 --> 01:24:05.406
as well as we did before.

1940
01:24:05.440 --> 01:24:07.408
[Nathan]<i> I was on</i>
<i>the same page as Neylan</i>

1941
01:24:07.442 --> 01:24:08.976
<i>just because it's
kind of weird, like,</i>

1942
01:24:09.010 --> 01:24:11.111
<i>not seeing someone
for such a long time</i>

1943
01:24:11.146 --> 01:24:12.479
<i>like two and a half years.</i>

1944
01:24:12.514 --> 01:24:14.459
But the connection
is still there,

1945
01:24:14.483 --> 01:24:16.784
which I'm, like, glad to see

1946
01:24:16.818 --> 01:24:18.986
so it's good to be back.

1947
01:24:19.020 --> 01:24:21.588
[birds chirping]

1948
01:24:21.623 --> 01:24:24.658
[dramatic music playing]

1949
01:24:26.895 --> 01:24:28.695
[Mattie] <i>After my 18th birthday,</i>

1950
01:24:28.730 --> 01:24:31.465
<i>I was waiting to hear
back from Latrice.</i>

1951
01:24:31.533 --> 01:24:34.435
<i>And I was just kind of
not really sure</i>

1952
01:24:34.469 --> 01:24:37.638
<i>how to proceed with everything.</i>

1953
01:24:37.672 --> 01:24:39.773
<i>I was always kind of
hesitant about it</i>

1954
01:24:39.808 --> 01:24:42.509
<i>and I was doing it
for the other siblings</i>

1955
01:24:42.544 --> 01:24:45.512
but also for myself.
And I don't know.

1956
01:24:45.547 --> 01:24:47.214
It's kind of one of those things

1957
01:24:47.248 --> 01:24:49.650
where you're putting yourself
so far out there

1958
01:24:49.684 --> 01:24:52.786
<i>and you're not sure what
the results are gonna be.</i>

1959
01:24:52.821 --> 01:24:55.823
<i>I got kind of very anxious
and nervous about it</i>

1960
01:24:55.857 --> 01:24:58.692
<i>just because I didn't
wanna have to be the one,</i>

1961
01:24:58.726 --> 01:25:02.496
<i>like, if he did reject
having contact with me.</i>

1962
01:25:02.530 --> 01:25:04.731
That for myself
would've been hard to handle,

1963
01:25:04.766 --> 01:25:08.669
but then also having to tell
all the other half-siblings,

1964
01:25:08.703 --> 01:25:10.871
<i>I didn't want to be
the one to, kind of,</i>

1965
01:25:10.905 --> 01:25:12.573
<i>break their hearts, in a sense,</i>

1966
01:25:12.607 --> 01:25:15.809
<i>especially those who
really do want to contact</i>

1967
01:25:15.877 --> 01:25:18.545
<i>the donor and end up
meeting him and everything.</i>

1968
01:25:18.580 --> 01:25:22.249
<i>And I don't know.
It was a lot of pressure.</i>

1969
01:25:22.283 --> 01:25:24.518
<i>It's not that I didn't want to</i>

1970
01:25:24.552 --> 01:25:27.354
<i>because I did,</i>

1971
01:25:27.388 --> 01:25:29.556
but I don't know,

1972
01:25:29.591 --> 01:25:31.525
I'm just comfortable
with my life.

1973
01:25:37.432 --> 01:25:40.901
[crickets chirping]

1974
01:25:40.935 --> 01:25:43.170
[Sadie]<i> All right.</i>
<i>So right now, I just got, um,</i>

1975
01:25:43.204 --> 01:25:44.838
an email from the Cryobank

1976
01:25:44.873 --> 01:25:47.908
that's forwarding
the information

1977
01:25:47.942 --> 01:25:49.510
my donor applied to, um,

1978
01:25:49.544 --> 01:25:51.545
because I wrote in
when I turned 18

1979
01:25:51.579 --> 01:25:53.080
about a month ago.

1980
01:25:53.114 --> 01:25:55.482
Um, to see if he wanted contact,

1981
01:25:55.517 --> 01:25:57.251
so, um, right now

1982
01:25:57.285 --> 01:26:00.254
I'm gonna go open the email.

1983
01:26:00.288 --> 01:26:02.789
It's almost 12:30 AM.

1984
01:26:04.025 --> 01:26:05.025
All right.

1985
01:26:07.295 --> 01:26:08.795
There's a photo.

1986
01:26:15.136 --> 01:26:17.404
He said he loves
my funky dreads.

1987
01:26:19.941 --> 01:26:21.875
He said, "There's not a day
that I do not think"

1988
01:26:21.910 --> 01:26:23.944
about you and your siblings.

1989
01:26:23.978 --> 01:26:26.747
I have had many nights
with little sleep pondering

1990
01:26:26.781 --> 01:26:28.549
and considering your lives.

1991
01:26:28.583 --> 01:26:30.117
The answers I have found
have made me feel

1992
01:26:30.151 --> 01:26:32.252
incredibly touched,
thankful, and proud.

1993
01:26:32.287 --> 01:26:34.321
I'm grateful that
for whatever reason

1994
01:26:34.355 --> 01:26:36.056
and from whatever
I gather so far,

1995
01:26:36.090 --> 01:26:37.925
that people that chose
to have you appear

1996
01:26:37.959 --> 01:26:40.561
to have done a great job.

1997
01:26:40.595 --> 01:26:42.629
Right now, I feel deeply
appreciated for this

1998
01:26:42.664 --> 01:26:44.798
opportunity to learn of your...

1999
01:26:44.832 --> 01:26:46.934
Of you and your wanting
to know more about me.

2000
01:26:46.968 --> 01:26:48.635
Thank you for sharing
your picture, information,

2001
01:26:48.670 --> 01:26:49.937
"and questions."

2002
01:26:52.574 --> 01:26:55.075
He's so nice.

2003
01:26:55.109 --> 01:26:57.911
The response really has
exceeded my expectations.

2004
01:26:57.946 --> 01:26:59.379
He sent so much.

2005
01:26:59.414 --> 01:27:02.849
I sent maybe like
10 short questions

2006
01:27:02.884 --> 01:27:06.386
and he's responded with
in-depth paragraphs

2007
01:27:06.421 --> 01:27:08.522
that are really thoughtful

2008
01:27:08.556 --> 01:27:11.625
and just seems like

2009
01:27:11.659 --> 01:27:14.728
it comes from the heart
and he's truly interested

2010
01:27:14.762 --> 01:27:16.630
and wants to share
the information,

2011
01:27:16.664 --> 01:27:17.998
which is nice.

2012
01:27:18.032 --> 01:27:19.266
He's not just doing it

2013
01:27:19.300 --> 01:27:22.469
to answer some questions
and please me.

2014
01:27:22.503 --> 01:27:26.240
He seems to want to share
and want to connect a bit.

2015
01:27:27.642 --> 01:27:30.677
All of a sudden, I get this
text from Sadie.

2016
01:27:30.712 --> 01:27:33.647
Do you want to see
pictures of the donor?

2017
01:27:33.681 --> 01:27:35.716
I was just, like, out
to dinner with my grandparents

2018
01:27:35.750 --> 01:27:37.184
and then started to text me

2019
01:27:37.218 --> 01:27:38.619
and I was just, like,
"Oh, my gosh.

2020
01:27:38.653 --> 01:27:40.153
What's going on?"

2021
01:27:40.188 --> 01:27:41.855
And they're like,
"Mattie, get off the phone."

2022
01:27:41.889 --> 01:27:43.790
I'm like, "I can't,
I can't get off my phone,

2023
01:27:43.825 --> 01:27:45.225
you don't understand."

2024
01:27:45.260 --> 01:27:47.861
I screamed and shut the computer

2025
01:27:47.895 --> 01:27:49.796
and ran to my room.

2026
01:27:49.831 --> 01:27:51.965
That's my dad.

2027
01:27:52.033 --> 01:27:54.368
<i>My mom had just pulled out
of the driveway</i>

2028
01:27:54.402 --> 01:27:57.137
<i>and it was like,
"Mom, come back."</i>

2029
01:27:57.171 --> 01:27:59.006
But she got back
and I was, like, crying

2030
01:27:59.040 --> 01:28:00.607
and holding my phone
and she was, like,

2031
01:28:00.642 --> 01:28:02.442
"What's wrong?" And I was like,

2032
01:28:02.477 --> 01:28:04.911
- "Here."
- Come on.

2033
01:28:04.946 --> 01:28:06.713
Oh, my God.

2034
01:28:06.748 --> 01:28:08.548
[Daniel] It's, like, so surreal,

2035
01:28:08.583 --> 01:28:11.885
like, it's hard to think that...

2036
01:28:11.919 --> 01:28:15.589
This is the person
that I have been hunting

2037
01:28:15.623 --> 01:28:18.091
and wondering about
for my whole life.

2038
01:28:18.126 --> 01:28:20.894
I had school today
and I didn't go. [laughs]

2039
01:28:20.928 --> 01:28:23.463
I was too, like, emotionally,
like, paralyzed

2040
01:28:23.498 --> 01:28:25.766
to do any
of my homework or study.

2041
01:28:25.800 --> 01:28:28.068
I don't think it's still,
like, hit me yet,

2042
01:28:28.102 --> 01:28:30.937
but every single time
I say it, I start to cry.

2043
01:28:30.972 --> 01:28:33.240
It doesn't seem real.

2044
01:28:33.274 --> 01:28:35.842
Sadie, she sends them
and I couldn't look at them,

2045
01:28:35.877 --> 01:28:37.778
so I gave it
to my friends and they...

2046
01:28:37.812 --> 01:28:39.379
And I sat
on the other side of them

2047
01:28:39.414 --> 01:28:41.181
and, like, they were all
lined up on the couch

2048
01:28:41.215 --> 01:28:43.583
in this dorm and I was, like,

2049
01:28:43.618 --> 01:28:45.052
"Can you look at them?"

2050
01:28:45.086 --> 01:28:46.253
And they were like, "Yeah."

2051
01:28:46.287 --> 01:28:47.254
And so I gave them the phone

2052
01:28:47.288 --> 01:28:49.456
and they're, like,

2053
01:28:49.490 --> 01:28:52.125
"He's hot." [laughs]

2054
01:28:52.160 --> 01:28:55.095
I showed my friends today
at basketball

2055
01:28:55.129 --> 01:28:56.930
and they're like,
"Wow. Like, that's you.

2056
01:28:56.964 --> 01:28:58.665
Like, you look
exactly like him."

2057
01:28:58.733 --> 01:29:00.667
I wished me and him
looked more alike

2058
01:29:00.702 --> 01:29:03.136
because I don't really see
any features that we share.

2059
01:29:03.171 --> 01:29:05.772
Some of the other boys
look a lot like him.

2060
01:29:05.807 --> 01:29:08.175
Our noses are, like,
exactly the same.

2061
01:29:08.209 --> 01:29:09.910
Literally, if you Photoshopped

2062
01:29:09.944 --> 01:29:12.179
all of our faces
into one person.

2063
01:29:12.213 --> 01:29:13.580
Like, it just makes sense,

2064
01:29:13.614 --> 01:29:15.282
like, everything
makes sense now.

2065
01:29:15.316 --> 01:29:17.984
I won't have to wonder anymore.

2066
01:29:18.019 --> 01:29:19.419
Like, I don't look
at a guy and be like,

2067
01:29:19.454 --> 01:29:20.654
"Oh, you could be my dad."

2068
01:29:20.688 --> 01:29:23.023
Like I know what he looks like.

2069
01:29:23.057 --> 01:29:26.326
[dramatic music playing]

2070
01:29:26.361 --> 01:29:28.962
[Alexis]<i> Turning 18 was like</i>
<i>the most anticipated birthday</i>

2071
01:29:28.996 --> 01:29:30.664
<i>of my entire life because I knew</i>

2072
01:29:30.698 --> 01:29:31.965
<i>I was able to possibly</i>

2073
01:29:32.033 --> 01:29:33.500
<i>come in contact with the donor.</i>

2074
01:29:33.534 --> 01:29:35.502
<i>When I got the email
from the Cryobank,</i>

2075
01:29:35.536 --> 01:29:38.271
<i>there was like an attachment,
and that attachment</i>

2076
01:29:38.306 --> 01:29:40.073
<i>was the letter
from the donor to me.</i>

2077
01:29:40.108 --> 01:29:42.509
What he had saved it as was,

2078
01:29:42.543 --> 01:29:44.411
"To Alexis."

2079
01:29:44.445 --> 01:29:47.748
And that already had me,
like, this.

2080
01:29:47.782 --> 01:29:50.517
<i>One of the most impactful
things that he said</i>

2081
01:29:50.551 --> 01:29:53.487
<i>in his letter was, "I think
about you every day."</i>

2082
01:29:53.521 --> 01:29:54.955
I don't know how to explain

2083
01:29:54.989 --> 01:29:58.191
how I felt about that in words.

2084
01:29:58.226 --> 01:30:01.161
It meant so much to me

2085
01:30:01.195 --> 01:30:02.829
that he said that.

2086
01:30:02.864 --> 01:30:04.598
<i>Three days later I was in class</i>

2087
01:30:04.632 --> 01:30:07.100
<i>and I just broke down
completely.</i>

2088
01:30:07.135 --> 01:30:08.769
And I think it was just this...

2089
01:30:08.803 --> 01:30:11.738
Like a realization
and processing of, like,

2090
01:30:11.773 --> 01:30:13.740
not just that
he had contacted me

2091
01:30:13.775 --> 01:30:15.242
but what that meant

2092
01:30:15.276 --> 01:30:18.845
and all of the emotions
behind that.

2093
01:30:18.880 --> 01:30:22.115
I was really just blown away.

2094
01:30:22.150 --> 01:30:24.918
I mean, I could almost
feel like a physical,

2095
01:30:24.952 --> 01:30:27.020
uh, something, you know.

2096
01:30:27.054 --> 01:30:30.957
I mean, it was just
so incredible,

2097
01:30:30.992 --> 01:30:33.593
incredible to meet this person

2098
01:30:33.628 --> 01:30:36.163
because I felt,
like, I was meeting him

2099
01:30:36.197 --> 01:30:37.431
even though, you know,

2100
01:30:37.465 --> 01:30:39.399
there was no name
attached to it.

2101
01:30:39.467 --> 01:30:42.736
Um, and I still...
I still can't get over it.

2102
01:30:42.770 --> 01:30:44.571
I felt like Javier
was really happy for me

2103
01:30:44.605 --> 01:30:45.939
because he knew
that it was something

2104
01:30:45.973 --> 01:30:47.908
that I've wanted
for a really long time.

2105
01:30:47.942 --> 01:30:49.309
He's kind of shy
about expressing

2106
01:30:49.343 --> 01:30:51.778
his emotions
but he can be very sweet.

2107
01:30:51.813 --> 01:30:54.014
Um, so he just kind of
ruffled my head

2108
01:30:54.048 --> 01:30:56.450
and he's like [speaking Spanish]

2109
01:30:56.484 --> 01:30:58.418
which means, like, "Oh,
you found your dad, huh?"

2110
01:30:58.453 --> 01:31:00.520
This is something that is you...

2111
01:31:00.555 --> 01:31:03.824
As a human being,
you need to have this.

2112
01:31:03.858 --> 01:31:05.592
And I think I see Alexis
also, like,

2113
01:31:05.626 --> 01:31:08.495
before, she was more,
you know, anxious

2114
01:31:08.529 --> 01:31:10.497
to see what was gonna happen

2115
01:31:10.531 --> 01:31:12.165
because she had to be 18,
but now that...

2116
01:31:12.233 --> 01:31:14.901
like this, a lot of relief.

2117
01:31:14.936 --> 01:31:18.371
And if she's relieved
we are relieved for sure.

2118
01:31:18.406 --> 01:31:20.574
I think, uh, before I turned 18,

2119
01:31:20.608 --> 01:31:22.409
a lot of my frustration

2120
01:31:22.443 --> 01:31:25.378
lied in not necessarily
not knowing who the donor was

2121
01:31:25.413 --> 01:31:27.047
but not knowing whether
I would ever know

2122
01:31:27.081 --> 01:31:29.082
who the donor was,
so the uncertainty.

2123
01:31:29.116 --> 01:31:33.653
Honestly, I've always had
a little bit of self-doubt,

2124
01:31:33.688 --> 01:31:36.022
<i>"Did I make a selfish decision</i>

2125
01:31:36.057 --> 01:31:38.925
<i>by choosing to have her
by myself?"</i>

2126
01:31:38.960 --> 01:31:43.430
<i>And I think that this
has brought her so much joy</i>

2127
01:31:43.464 --> 01:31:46.800
and also validation
that I don't think

2128
01:31:46.834 --> 01:31:50.403
<i>I'm gonna feel that
as frequently as I have.</i>

2129
01:31:52.406 --> 01:31:54.841
[Alexis]<i> So I wrote</i>
<i>the donor back and this is</i>

2130
01:31:54.876 --> 01:31:57.811
<i>how I ended my letter to him,</i>

2131
01:31:57.845 --> 01:32:00.213
"I'm also very happy
to be in contact with you."

2132
01:32:00.248 --> 01:32:02.282
It does feel very unreal
as it is something

2133
01:32:02.316 --> 01:32:03.984
that has always seemed
like a very far way

2134
01:32:04.018 --> 01:32:05.619
and uncertain thing.

2135
01:32:05.653 --> 01:32:07.454
I have of course wondered
and thought about you

2136
01:32:07.488 --> 01:32:09.122
and your family every day

2137
01:32:09.156 --> 01:32:10.457
for as long as I can remember.

2138
01:32:10.491 --> 01:32:12.392
So your response means a lot.

2139
01:32:12.426 --> 01:32:13.894
Like you've hoped,
your being a donor

2140
01:32:13.928 --> 01:32:16.229
has for sure resulted
many happy families.

2141
01:32:16.264 --> 01:32:18.164
Meeting these families,
and my brothers and sisters,

2142
01:32:18.199 --> 01:32:19.633
has brought
a whole lot of friendship,

2143
01:32:19.667 --> 01:32:22.435
love, and support
into all of our lives.

2144
01:32:22.470 --> 01:32:26.473
I feel very grateful as do
my siblings and their parents.

2145
01:32:26.507 --> 01:32:28.875
"Looking forward
to our next correspondence."

2146
01:32:28.910 --> 01:32:31.912
[dramatic music playing]

2147
01:32:33.748 --> 01:32:36.750
[birds chirping]

2148
01:32:50.798 --> 01:32:54.234
[man]<i> Today's date</i>
<i>is November 3rd, 2017.</i>

2149
01:32:54.268 --> 01:32:57.270
<i>This is Donor 5114.</i>

2150
01:32:57.305 --> 01:32:58.872
<i>My being a donor
has been on my mind</i>

2151
01:32:58.906 --> 01:33:00.574
<i>through the years.</i>

2152
01:33:00.608 --> 01:33:03.510
<i>As a donor, you have
an opportunity to ponder</i>

2153
01:33:03.544 --> 01:33:06.012
<i>and to care about something</i>

2154
01:33:06.047 --> 01:33:08.315
<i>that is going to exist</i>

2155
01:33:08.349 --> 01:33:11.718
<i>that is out of your control.</i>

2156
01:33:11.752 --> 01:33:14.554
<i>The decision for me
to become an anonymous donor</i>

2157
01:33:14.589 --> 01:33:17.057
<i>was out of respect
to the parents.</i>

2158
01:33:17.091 --> 01:33:19.993
<i>I felt, like,
removing me as a variable</i>

2159
01:33:20.027 --> 01:33:22.829
<i>would help parents
to create a nurturing</i>

2160
01:33:22.863 --> 01:33:26.433
<i>and stable environment
without any distractions.</i>

2161
01:33:26.467 --> 01:33:29.502
<i>But I certainly was hopeful</i>

2162
01:33:29.537 --> 01:33:31.605
<i>that I would get information</i>

2163
01:33:31.639 --> 01:33:33.607
<i>and learn as much as I could</i>

2164
01:33:33.641 --> 01:33:35.175
<i>about how they were all doing.</i>

2165
01:33:35.209 --> 01:33:36.776
<i>I think if I hadn't,</i>

2166
01:33:36.811 --> 01:33:39.412
<i>it would probably
start eating at me.</i>

2167
01:33:41.248 --> 01:33:44.317
<i>It's hard to imagine
being the genetic half</i>

2168
01:33:44.352 --> 01:33:46.019
<i>to so many people.</i>

2169
01:33:46.053 --> 01:33:47.954
<i>People that are related to you</i>

2170
01:33:47.989 --> 01:33:49.789
<i>in a significant way</i>

2171
01:33:49.824 --> 01:33:52.225
<i>after not knowing them ever</i>

2172
01:33:52.259 --> 01:33:54.995
<i>in person
for much of their life.</i>

2173
01:33:55.029 --> 01:33:58.331
<i>I've given some thought
to what it might be like</i>

2174
01:33:58.366 --> 01:34:01.434
<i>for some of the offspring
to have the curiosity</i>

2175
01:34:01.469 --> 01:34:05.005
<i>about who their
biological father might be.</i>

2176
01:34:05.039 --> 01:34:07.007
<i>That's really one big reason</i>

2177
01:34:07.041 --> 01:34:08.508
<i>why I'm participating in this,</i>

2178
01:34:08.542 --> 01:34:11.511
<i>is so that I can help them</i>

2179
01:34:11.545 --> 01:34:13.279
<i>finally deal
with those questions,</i>

2180
01:34:13.314 --> 01:34:16.883
<i>uh, and have answers
to those questions.</i>

2181
01:34:16.917 --> 01:34:19.185
<i>I would love to meet
each of the kids,</i>

2182
01:34:19.220 --> 01:34:21.588
<i>you know, I think it would be
a really neat experience.</i>

2183
01:34:21.622 --> 01:34:23.023
<i>I'm very curious to meet them</i>

2184
01:34:23.057 --> 01:34:26.226
<i>and to learn
from their experiences</i>

2185
01:34:26.260 --> 01:34:27.761
<i>and to see how things are going.</i>

2186
01:34:27.795 --> 01:34:32.165
<i>And the best part
of being a donor so far</i>

2187
01:34:32.233 --> 01:34:34.567
<i>is knowing that I helped people</i>

2188
01:34:34.602 --> 01:34:37.270
<i>and knowing that people
that really wanted</i>

2189
01:34:37.304 --> 01:34:40.340
<i>to have a family
were able to have a family.</i>

2190
01:34:40.374 --> 01:34:43.076
<i>So my wife and I are going
through this together.</i>

2191
01:34:43.110 --> 01:34:45.412
<i>I'm looking forward
to all of the experiences</i>

2192
01:34:45.446 --> 01:34:48.214
<i>that can be shared.
The answers I've found</i>

2193
01:34:48.249 --> 01:34:50.283
<i>have made me feel
incredibly touched,</i>

2194
01:34:50.317 --> 01:34:52.919
<i>thankful, and proud.</i>

2195
01:34:58.759 --> 01:35:01.828
[birds chirping]

2196
01:35:19.780 --> 01:35:23.183
[Nathan]<i> If I never connected</i>
<i>with any of the siblings,</i>

2197
01:35:23.217 --> 01:35:25.351
<i>I think my life
would be a lot different.</i>

2198
01:35:25.386 --> 01:35:26.920
<i>I think as a person,</i>

2199
01:35:26.954 --> 01:35:29.756
<i>I'd still be relatively the same</i>

2200
01:35:29.790 --> 01:35:31.691
<i>but I would definitely
be missing out</i>

2201
01:35:31.726 --> 01:35:34.260
<i>on some great relationships
and bonds with people</i>

2202
01:35:34.295 --> 01:35:36.529
<i>that you can't really
get any other way.</i>

2203
01:35:39.433 --> 01:35:41.101
[Danny]<i> Growing up like</i>
<i>when you're in middle school</i>

2204
01:35:41.135 --> 01:35:43.303
<i>and high school,
having people that</i>

2205
01:35:43.337 --> 01:35:45.238
<i>you can relate to
and fall back on,</i>

2206
01:35:45.272 --> 01:35:48.475
<i>it just really
has created such an amazing</i>

2207
01:35:48.509 --> 01:35:50.009
<i>support system for me.</i>

2208
01:35:50.044 --> 01:35:51.644
<i>And I don't know,</i>

2209
01:35:51.679 --> 01:35:53.646
<i>I just don't think
I question myself</i>

2210
01:35:53.681 --> 01:35:55.615
<i>as much as I used to.</i>

2211
01:35:57.485 --> 01:35:58.985
[Mattie]
<i>Through the whole process,</i>

2212
01:35:59.019 --> 01:36:01.421
<i>it was just mostly like
a self-discovery,</i>

2213
01:36:01.455 --> 01:36:04.357
<i>like, all of the things
that I went through</i>

2214
01:36:04.391 --> 01:36:05.825
<i>and the people that I met,</i>

2215
01:36:05.860 --> 01:36:08.595
<i>it helped lead me
to who I am now.</i>

2216
01:36:08.629 --> 01:36:10.396
<i>I've learned to be more curious</i>

2217
01:36:10.431 --> 01:36:11.731
<i>and to not push the limits</i>

2218
01:36:11.766 --> 01:36:13.266
<i>but test it a little.</i>

2219
01:36:15.002 --> 01:36:17.737
[Neylan]<i> This experience</i>
<i>has thought me that</i>

2220
01:36:17.772 --> 01:36:19.739
<i>your family is more than like</i>

2221
01:36:19.774 --> 01:36:22.742
<i>who is right there with you
all the time.</i>

2222
01:36:22.777 --> 01:36:24.511
<i>And you can feel close
to somebody</i>

2223
01:36:24.545 --> 01:36:27.647
<i>that lives in Alaska or,
like, across the country</i>

2224
01:36:27.681 --> 01:36:29.716
<i>from you or wherever they are.</i>

2225
01:36:29.750 --> 01:36:31.151
<i>It's just how you choose</i>

2226
01:36:31.185 --> 01:36:34.387
<i>to build that relationship.</i>

2227
01:36:34.421 --> 01:36:38.024
[Alexis]<i> To my younger self,</i>
<i>I would say</i>

2228
01:36:38.058 --> 01:36:39.926
<i>you can come into this world mad</i>

2229
01:36:39.960 --> 01:36:42.228
<i>about how you were conceived</i>

2230
01:36:42.263 --> 01:36:44.664
<i>but you also have to realize</i>

2231
01:36:44.698 --> 01:36:47.200
<i>that you function
completely independently</i>

2232
01:36:47.234 --> 01:36:48.802
<i>from any of those other factors</i>

2233
01:36:48.836 --> 01:36:50.537
<i>and that you are your own person</i>

2234
01:36:50.571 --> 01:36:52.405
<i>and that it does not matter.</i>

2235
01:36:52.439 --> 01:36:54.207
<i>At the end of the day,</i>

2236
01:36:54.241 --> 01:36:56.910
you're still you, and it's okay.

2237
01:36:56.944 --> 01:37:00.013
[dramatic music playing]

2238
01:37:12.426 --> 01:37:15.461
[dramatic music playing]