1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:11,402 --> 00:00:16,233 [smooth funk music] 4 00:00:18,888 --> 00:00:20,716 Congratulations, Miles. 5 00:00:22,500 --> 00:00:23,762 The job is yours. 6 00:00:29,681 --> 00:00:31,031 [laughter] 7 00:00:32,683 --> 00:00:34,730 Miles has a millimeter Peter. 8 00:00:34,904 --> 00:00:37,211 Indians call it a "Teepee peepee!" 9 00:00:37,385 --> 00:00:40,040 -[native American chanting] -What the hell? Hey! 10 00:00:40,562 --> 00:00:42,781 Man, that's why your daddies don't want your asses! 11 00:00:43,608 --> 00:00:46,916 ["Never Wanna Grow Up" by Katrina Stone] 12 00:00:51,616 --> 00:00:53,227 -Dylan! -Fuck! 13 00:00:53,705 --> 00:00:56,273 -You got any Plan C pills? -It's Plan B? 14 00:00:56,447 --> 00:00:59,189 Look, the girl from last night said there was a Plan C pill, 15 00:00:59,363 --> 00:01:01,148 for the other raw-dog slip-up. 16 00:01:02,671 --> 00:01:03,759 She has gonorrhea. 17 00:01:13,334 --> 00:01:16,337 Oye Papi,'chu look good. 18 00:01:17,381 --> 00:01:18,208 [sighs] 19 00:01:18,991 --> 00:01:19,818 Hey, Google. 20 00:01:20,471 --> 00:01:21,994 How do you say "bullshit" 21 00:01:22,517 --> 00:01:23,735 in Spanish? 22 00:01:24,301 --> 00:01:26,042 [Google] The pronunciation is"Mierda." 23 00:01:26,651 --> 00:01:27,870 Mierda? 24 00:01:28,044 --> 00:01:30,307 -Close!"Mierda." -Murda. 25 00:01:30,873 --> 00:01:32,831 -Murda! -Damn, bitch! 26 00:01:33,005 --> 00:01:34,920 Order somepinche Rosetta,guera. 27 00:01:36,922 --> 00:01:40,187 While local law enforcement are reluctant to release any information, 28 00:01:40,360 --> 00:01:42,884 I threatened to blackmail a few anonymous sources 29 00:01:43,059 --> 00:01:45,235 down at the precinct, and found that the victim 30 00:01:45,408 --> 00:01:47,455 was simply known as "Will." 31 00:01:47,628 --> 00:01:49,805 An employee at Danrick Design, 32 00:01:49,979 --> 00:01:52,676 of what many are calling the most horrific-- 33 00:01:52,851 --> 00:01:54,592 Sir, we are recording live. 34 00:01:54,765 --> 00:01:56,899 -Thank you. -Oh, sorry. Sorry about that. 35 00:02:00,903 --> 00:02:04,472 Yo! That's my son, ese! 36 00:02:06,778 --> 00:02:07,910 Rick... 37 00:02:08,476 --> 00:02:12,088 -That was an accident. -No. Fuck that, Al. 38 00:02:12,262 --> 00:02:15,309 Rick, you know my name is Sanj? Who's Al? 39 00:02:15,483 --> 00:02:18,138 You. Al-Qaeda! 40 00:02:19,226 --> 00:02:22,272 Yeah! Terrorizing little kids. 41 00:02:23,839 --> 00:02:24,840 [screams] 42 00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:32,935 Get that ass in gear, Mom! 43 00:02:33,109 --> 00:02:35,242 Oh, calm down, Lainee! 44 00:02:35,416 --> 00:02:37,809 I'll give you calm, when I'm in a casket. 45 00:02:37,983 --> 00:02:40,377 Today? Today's carpe-motherfucking-diem. 46 00:02:40,725 --> 00:02:43,989 I'm on my grind, Mom, and unless you want to end up like those losers, 47 00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:45,730 I suggest you do the same. 48 00:02:46,296 --> 00:02:48,385 ♪ Farther than our eyes have ever seen ♪ 49 00:02:48,559 --> 00:02:50,735 ♪ I don't wanna grow up ♪ 50 00:02:55,523 --> 00:02:59,004 [horns honking] 51 00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:03,226 ♪ Lately, could we misbehave a bit more? ♪ 52 00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:05,794 ♪ Never know what's in store ♪ 53 00:03:05,968 --> 00:03:08,275 ♪ When we're rowdy and bored ♪ 54 00:03:08,449 --> 00:03:13,018 ♪ Honey, can we catch some floating fireflies? ♪ 55 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:15,456 ♪ Let 'em light our way tonight ♪ 56 00:03:15,630 --> 00:03:17,980 ♪ Through the Neverland skies ♪ 57 00:03:18,154 --> 00:03:21,113 ♪ All the whole night through ♪ 58 00:03:21,810 --> 00:03:26,293 ♪ 'Cause we don't wanna grow up ♪ 59 00:03:26,466 --> 00:03:28,512 ♪ We just wanna be young ♪ 60 00:03:28,686 --> 00:03:30,949 [music fades] 61 00:03:31,123 --> 00:03:33,909 Seriously, am I, like, the lost Kardashian or something? 62 00:03:34,692 --> 00:03:36,128 If the dating scene weren't lame enough, 63 00:03:36,303 --> 00:03:37,781 I post a few squat pics at the gym, 64 00:03:37,956 --> 00:03:39,436 and there's Black dudes in my DMs, 65 00:03:39,610 --> 00:03:41,699 like I was handing out child support pardons. 66 00:03:44,876 --> 00:03:46,965 Come on. This used to be our norm. 67 00:03:47,139 --> 00:03:48,706 I know, it's just-- 68 00:03:49,446 --> 00:03:52,710 [indistinct talking in background] 69 00:03:56,105 --> 00:03:59,021 [shouting in background] 70 00:04:00,065 --> 00:04:01,458 -Yo? -Yerp! 71 00:04:01,632 --> 00:04:04,156 Will's wife could barely carry that box, like, 72 00:04:05,114 --> 00:04:07,421 how the hell could she have let his body hang like that? 73 00:04:07,595 --> 00:04:10,075 Man, all I know is, Mandy told me that Will's wife 74 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:12,687 was calling and talking crazy! 75 00:04:12,861 --> 00:04:15,690 Will was scared as shit! 76 00:04:15,864 --> 00:04:17,995 Hey, who do you think they'll tag for his position? 77 00:04:19,737 --> 00:04:21,826 His seat still has his warm ass prints. 78 00:04:22,349 --> 00:04:24,481 -They won't replace him that quickly. -[chuckles] 79 00:04:24,655 --> 00:04:26,353 Did you forget who our boss is? 80 00:04:28,529 --> 00:04:31,009 Press your index and thumb together as hard as you can? 81 00:04:33,055 --> 00:04:34,970 That's how many fucks she gives. 82 00:04:35,927 --> 00:04:39,017 Oh, her balls are bigger than yours. 83 00:04:42,891 --> 00:04:45,720 You know, you'll probably be the first up to get promoted to his position. 84 00:04:46,851 --> 00:04:48,505 That kind of power could be sexy. 85 00:04:49,201 --> 00:04:50,420 [inhales] 86 00:04:50,594 --> 00:04:53,380 [coughs violently] 87 00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:56,207 Or Miles. 88 00:04:58,994 --> 00:05:00,604 Hmm, God bless America with tetas. 89 00:05:00,778 --> 00:05:02,693 Hey, guys. Great day, right? 90 00:05:02,867 --> 00:05:04,391 -Wonderful. -[sighs] Hmm. 91 00:05:07,394 --> 00:05:10,005 Yo, so who do you think they gonna tag for Will's job? 92 00:05:10,179 --> 00:05:11,528 It might be you, dawg! 93 00:05:11,876 --> 00:05:14,096 You or Dylan. Fuck that White boy, though. 94 00:05:14,966 --> 00:05:16,968 Ami doesn't even know I'm an employee, bro. 95 00:05:17,665 --> 00:05:20,102 Yesterday, I had on a brown shirt. 96 00:05:20,276 --> 00:05:22,322 Why she hand me UPS Boxes, bruh? 97 00:05:22,496 --> 00:05:24,280 [clears throat] 98 00:05:29,416 --> 00:05:30,634 Thanks, Miles. 99 00:05:31,461 --> 00:05:34,116 You know, if anybody else gets that promotion, 100 00:05:34,551 --> 00:05:35,944 I think it should be you. 101 00:05:36,510 --> 00:05:38,990 If our profits don't go up, you're going to get fired. 102 00:05:39,164 --> 00:05:42,690 -"I can't, I have a family, and a house, and a--" -[phone rings] 103 00:05:42,864 --> 00:05:45,780 -DanRick Designs, your hole is our goal. -Hello. Hey, this is José. 104 00:05:45,954 --> 00:05:49,174 I... [coughs] I don't think I'm going to be able to make it in today. 105 00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:51,568 -So you're calling off? -No, no. 106 00:05:51,742 --> 00:05:54,397 I wish I could be at work, seriously. 107 00:05:54,571 --> 00:05:57,139 -It's just, I'm really sick. -Right, right. 108 00:05:57,313 --> 00:06:01,012 So, typically, when a person calls to say they need a day off, 109 00:06:01,186 --> 00:06:02,927 those in the united human kingdom 110 00:06:03,101 --> 00:06:04,668 refer to that as a "call off." 111 00:06:04,842 --> 00:06:06,322 I'm not really into labels. 112 00:06:08,933 --> 00:06:10,195 Thank you for covering. 113 00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:12,328 -Gracias. -Oh, totally cool. 114 00:06:12,502 --> 00:06:14,504 If only I could spend more of my internship 115 00:06:14,678 --> 00:06:17,332 learning the valuable skill of phone answering. 116 00:06:17,507 --> 00:06:19,335 I bet I could save a ton in tuition, 117 00:06:19,509 --> 00:06:21,859 and maybe even skip college altogether. 118 00:06:22,033 --> 00:06:24,819 [chuckles] You know, sweetie, being a receptionist, 119 00:06:24,993 --> 00:06:27,169 there's more to it than just answering phones. 120 00:06:27,343 --> 00:06:30,651 Oh, you mean, hanging them up is a different set of classes? 121 00:06:30,825 --> 00:06:33,915 -Why, you little-- -When exactly does that fashion training kick in? 122 00:06:34,089 --> 00:06:36,308 Ugh! Dresses like these 123 00:06:36,483 --> 00:06:38,746 are muchocritically to the Latino culture. 124 00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:41,401 -Then why are you wearing it? -Ugh! 125 00:06:41,575 --> 00:06:43,838 Mier-- fuck! 126 00:06:44,316 --> 00:06:46,797 ♪ Living good I'm living great ♪ 127 00:06:46,971 --> 00:06:49,757 ♪ Everything I do I do it in first place ♪ 128 00:06:49,931 --> 00:06:53,369 ♪ I said I'm living good I'm living great ♪ 129 00:06:53,543 --> 00:06:56,981 ♪ Everything I do I do it in first place, yeah ♪ 130 00:06:57,155 --> 00:07:00,811 ♪ Yeah, watch my money grow watch my money grow, like a-- ♪ 131 00:07:00,985 --> 00:07:03,510 ♪ Watch my money grow like a proud parent ♪ 132 00:07:03,684 --> 00:07:07,644 ♪ Yeah, my money ain't old and it's colder than a snow bunny ♪ 133 00:07:07,818 --> 00:07:09,907 ♪ Happy getting money, honey ♪ 134 00:07:10,691 --> 00:07:14,085 -[sharp thud] -Perhaps I was unclear at our last meeting, 135 00:07:14,259 --> 00:07:17,349 when I provided a simple set of goals 136 00:07:17,524 --> 00:07:18,829 for this quarter. Lainee? 137 00:07:20,701 --> 00:07:23,486 Double digit turnaround in revenue and profit margins, 138 00:07:23,660 --> 00:07:25,096 by the time we're reconvened. 139 00:07:25,662 --> 00:07:27,664 Super sorry I'm late, guys, I had some... 140 00:07:28,491 --> 00:07:31,320 congestion in the network. 141 00:07:31,494 --> 00:07:33,844 -This nigga was taking a dookie. -[laughter] 142 00:07:34,018 --> 00:07:35,933 He done backed up the whole damn toilet. 143 00:07:36,107 --> 00:07:37,674 Look, it's a lot of shit in that motherfucker, 144 00:07:37,848 --> 00:07:39,459 and I don't get paid for all that. 145 00:07:40,938 --> 00:07:42,331 You're a janitor. 146 00:07:42,505 --> 00:07:44,725 That's exactly why you get paid. And, uh-- 147 00:07:45,639 --> 00:07:49,425 -Anyways, what makes you think it was me? -[chuckles] 148 00:07:49,599 --> 00:07:52,733 I done seen them little broke-ass, Brooks Brothers wannabe shoes 149 00:07:52,907 --> 00:07:55,605 -and your little feet just twitching under the door. -[all laugh] 150 00:07:55,779 --> 00:07:58,303 Look, I don't get paid to kick people's asses either. 151 00:07:58,478 --> 00:08:00,131 Don't make me go pro-bono. 152 00:08:02,699 --> 00:08:05,267 [whimsical music] 153 00:08:09,532 --> 00:08:11,534 I'm supposed to be IT. 154 00:08:13,057 --> 00:08:15,756 -Not S-H-I-T. -[laughter] 155 00:08:15,930 --> 00:08:18,367 ["West Coast Thang" by Nipsey Hussle feat. KrsTQ & Ill Will] 156 00:08:30,466 --> 00:08:31,902 [phone rings] 157 00:08:32,076 --> 00:08:34,470 DanRick Designs, where your hole is our goal! 158 00:08:34,644 --> 00:08:36,645 Hey, sis. Qué pasa en la raza? 159 00:08:36,820 --> 00:08:37,995 María? 160 00:08:38,169 --> 00:08:39,301 Oh, hey. 161 00:08:40,258 --> 00:08:41,433 You cut out. 162 00:08:41,782 --> 00:08:42,913 Qué haciendo? 163 00:08:43,087 --> 00:08:46,003 I can't hear you, uh, bad signal! 164 00:08:47,439 --> 00:08:48,745 Enough grab-ass! 165 00:08:49,137 --> 00:08:50,965 Department reports! HR. 166 00:08:52,357 --> 00:08:57,058 Uh, today we'll be honoring a couple of our esteemed colleagues. 167 00:08:57,232 --> 00:09:00,670 First, we'll have a memorial for everyone's favorite co-worker, Will. 168 00:09:00,844 --> 00:09:01,758 We have some-- 169 00:09:03,238 --> 00:09:06,197 We have some great video from the charities he helped. Spoiler alert! 170 00:09:06,371 --> 00:09:08,722 There were plenty, so bring Kleenex. A little later, we'll lighten the mood, 171 00:09:08,896 --> 00:09:10,724 as we celebrate Juan's b-day. Who doesn't love free cake? 172 00:09:10,898 --> 00:09:12,639 -Just need a small donation from everyone. -I don't like it. 173 00:09:12,813 --> 00:09:13,944 We don't like it. 174 00:09:14,684 --> 00:09:17,818 -Uh, don't like which--- -Any of it. 175 00:09:18,732 --> 00:09:20,124 [whispering] He may cry again. 176 00:09:21,299 --> 00:09:24,172 You have ten minutes. 12:50 to 1:00 p.m. Make it work. 177 00:09:24,346 --> 00:09:25,521 Next, IT. 178 00:09:25,695 --> 00:09:28,132 [traditional Indian music] 179 00:09:38,012 --> 00:09:40,362 I said, "I'm on my way to LA." 180 00:09:40,884 --> 00:09:42,233 Going to surprise you and your new bae. 181 00:09:42,407 --> 00:09:44,453 My new bae, right. 182 00:09:44,627 --> 00:09:45,976 Um... 183 00:09:46,150 --> 00:09:47,717 What's Señor Caliente's name, anyway? 184 00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:50,677 -Um, uh... -[frantic clicking] 185 00:09:50,851 --> 00:09:54,115 Juan Guapo Hungrod Martinez. 186 00:09:54,550 --> 00:09:56,857 Oh, he sounds super south of the border. 187 00:09:57,597 --> 00:09:59,947 Might be some Eas' Los sangre in you yet,chica. 188 00:10:00,121 --> 00:10:02,210 Sí,major sí. 189 00:10:02,558 --> 00:10:05,343 Uh, I thought about what you and Mom had said. 190 00:10:05,517 --> 00:10:09,870 Dad and aunty Patricia, uncle Hector, our neighbors, 191 00:10:10,044 --> 00:10:12,002 the old lady who does my nails. 192 00:10:13,264 --> 00:10:16,311 Anyone could read Latin studies, 193 00:10:16,703 --> 00:10:19,836 but not everyone could live the Latin culture. 194 00:10:20,228 --> 00:10:21,403 Ay, mija,look at you! 195 00:10:22,230 --> 00:10:23,797 When I get down there, I'm gonna swing over to trabajo. 196 00:10:23,971 --> 00:10:25,494 So, este... 197 00:10:26,277 --> 00:10:27,714 What did you say his name was again? 198 00:10:27,888 --> 00:10:30,281 Juan Guapo Hungrod Martinez. 199 00:10:30,455 --> 00:10:31,631 Juan Guapo. 200 00:10:32,414 --> 00:10:33,894 Get him to meet us for lunch. 201 00:10:34,068 --> 00:10:35,330 I want to see what he's all about, qué no? 202 00:10:35,504 --> 00:10:37,811 K, yes, but he's kind of a boss who-- 203 00:10:37,985 --> 00:10:39,639 El jefe? 204 00:10:39,813 --> 00:10:41,858 So he shouldn't have any problem meeting with us, pues. 205 00:10:42,032 --> 00:10:44,078 [whimpers] 206 00:10:44,687 --> 00:10:46,036 Oh! 207 00:10:46,602 --> 00:10:48,256 Next up, Innovations. 208 00:10:48,822 --> 00:10:50,606 -New development today. -Really exciting news! 209 00:10:50,780 --> 00:10:53,348 [tense dramatic music] 210 00:10:53,957 --> 00:10:57,047 Well, this is some really exciting news. 211 00:10:58,005 --> 00:10:59,876 And this is pretty cutting edge. 212 00:11:00,050 --> 00:11:01,835 [Ami] Oh, I just remembered. 213 00:11:02,487 --> 00:11:06,187 Will was great... but he's dead. 214 00:11:06,927 --> 00:11:10,104 Silver lining, we'll be having open interviews for his position. 215 00:11:10,278 --> 00:11:13,237 We've already narrowed down our finalists to Dylan and Miles. 216 00:11:13,411 --> 00:11:14,499 [grunting] 217 00:11:16,806 --> 00:11:20,244 Hey, hey... [chuckles] 218 00:11:20,418 --> 00:11:24,814 Yo! It's going di-di-di-di down down, son! 219 00:11:25,597 --> 00:11:27,817 Finally, move out of your parents' garage! 220 00:11:27,991 --> 00:11:31,429 Yeah, bro! Still kind of surprised Ami even knows I'm alive. 221 00:11:31,603 --> 00:11:34,694 [laughing] Hey, yo, hey, yo. I got to call my pops! 222 00:11:34,868 --> 00:11:36,870 Dale!Go ahead, bro! 223 00:11:37,044 --> 00:11:39,960 [salsa music] 224 00:11:43,398 --> 00:11:45,530 I told you, I told you! 225 00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:47,707 [inhales deeply] 226 00:11:49,056 --> 00:11:50,057 Uh... 227 00:11:51,145 --> 00:11:53,016 If I get this promotion, 228 00:11:54,322 --> 00:11:55,758 I'm taking you out. 229 00:11:56,498 --> 00:11:58,718 Get you all dolled up, 230 00:11:58,892 --> 00:12:00,023 and then... 231 00:12:02,417 --> 00:12:04,201 You know, if you... 232 00:12:05,246 --> 00:12:08,597 If you ever wanted food or beverages... 233 00:12:09,598 --> 00:12:10,599 ever. 234 00:12:12,340 --> 00:12:13,297 Whatever. 235 00:12:13,471 --> 00:12:14,995 Well, I do have 236 00:12:15,169 --> 00:12:16,648 this manipulative red dress, 237 00:12:16,823 --> 00:12:19,869 -I've been waiting to, um-- -Oh, manipulative. 238 00:12:20,043 --> 00:12:21,741 Oh! 239 00:12:22,306 --> 00:12:24,047 I've got to go call my mum real quick. 240 00:12:24,221 --> 00:12:25,832 [phone rings] 241 00:12:27,311 --> 00:12:28,486 Great minds, right? 242 00:12:29,270 --> 00:12:32,142 I was literally debating if ten minutes 243 00:12:32,316 --> 00:12:33,840 was enough time just to get-- 244 00:12:34,014 --> 00:12:36,451 Laurie Caldwell needs to be fired. 245 00:12:37,669 --> 00:12:39,933 Oh, okay. I can start a paper-- 246 00:12:40,107 --> 00:12:41,586 -Today. -By noon. 247 00:12:42,239 --> 00:12:43,937 That's all. Thank you. 248 00:12:44,589 --> 00:12:46,374 Deuces, with a discount. 249 00:12:46,548 --> 00:12:48,245 [whimsical music] 250 00:12:52,989 --> 00:12:55,296 Look, I just need him to show up for a few hours. 251 00:12:55,470 --> 00:12:57,341 I'm not even worried about the sex part. 252 00:12:58,560 --> 00:13:01,171 Well, I mean, if it's that big, and it's part of the price... 253 00:13:01,345 --> 00:13:02,738 [lock beeps and clicks] 254 00:13:04,653 --> 00:13:05,523 Hey, Juan. 255 00:13:06,742 --> 00:13:09,484 How come we've never gone out for some drinks? 256 00:13:09,658 --> 00:13:12,052 Because my mom would kill me for dating a White girl. 257 00:13:12,487 --> 00:13:13,923 But I'm not. 258 00:13:17,187 --> 00:13:19,668 Hey, Sanj. Got a second? 259 00:13:19,842 --> 00:13:21,409 [phone rings] 260 00:13:24,151 --> 00:13:25,152 Hey, uh... 261 00:13:26,327 --> 00:13:27,719 Congrats on the opportunity. 262 00:13:28,677 --> 00:13:30,070 Yeah, yeah. You too. 263 00:13:30,592 --> 00:13:32,812 [light dramatic music] 264 00:13:33,334 --> 00:13:35,379 Hey, may the best man win. 265 00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:41,298 Yep. And the best way we can honor Will, 266 00:13:41,472 --> 00:13:44,214 is commit the same level of dedication and results 267 00:13:44,388 --> 00:13:45,563 to his clients like you. 268 00:13:47,261 --> 00:13:48,262 Sure! 269 00:13:48,436 --> 00:13:49,785 I'd be honored to work with you. 270 00:13:50,568 --> 00:13:52,832 If you could just let Ami know you'd prefer me 271 00:13:53,006 --> 00:13:54,485 overseeing your portfolio... 272 00:13:56,270 --> 00:13:57,401 [chuckles] Sounds good. 273 00:13:57,837 --> 00:13:59,708 Hey-- not if I see you first. 274 00:13:59,882 --> 00:14:01,449 [chuckles] 275 00:14:03,103 --> 00:14:05,235 How did you know the victim, Will, 276 00:14:05,409 --> 00:14:07,237 or any details of his crime? 277 00:14:07,411 --> 00:14:09,936 Yo, this is Bron. Purp' n' gold gang all day. 278 00:14:10,110 --> 00:14:11,502 R.I.P to my girl, Kathy tha-- 279 00:14:11,676 --> 00:14:13,504 Did you happen to know the victim, Will, 280 00:14:13,678 --> 00:14:15,550 or any details in regards to his murder? 281 00:14:15,724 --> 00:14:18,814 Oh, yeah. Yeah! For real, for-- for sure. 282 00:14:18,988 --> 00:14:20,990 Yeah, Will be getting it in. [chuckles] 283 00:14:21,164 --> 00:14:23,514 -Oh, "Will be getting it in"? -Oh, yes. Yes. 284 00:14:23,688 --> 00:14:25,690 Will definitely be getting it in. 285 00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,562 You feel me? He don't play. 286 00:14:27,736 --> 00:14:28,911 I don't play. 287 00:14:29,651 --> 00:14:31,871 -That's just the way we live. Yeah. -Oh, so-- 288 00:14:32,045 --> 00:14:33,829 so you two were well acquainted? 289 00:14:35,265 --> 00:14:36,353 Wha-- what that mean? 290 00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:40,401 You were close? You knew each other? 291 00:14:40,575 --> 00:14:43,230 Uh, wasn't nobody humping around, if that's what that mean. 292 00:14:43,404 --> 00:14:46,102 -[reporter] Oh, okay. Okay, well... -[Bron] Yeah. 293 00:14:46,276 --> 00:14:47,712 ...thank you so much for your time today. 294 00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,497 All right, all right, all right, all right. 295 00:14:49,671 --> 00:14:53,544 Did I know Will? Technically, no. 296 00:14:53,718 --> 00:14:56,939 -But, I do think-- No, wait one second. -Okay. Thank you so much. 297 00:14:57,113 --> 00:14:59,681 -I do think that he copped my mixtape from the store... -No, thank you so much for-- 298 00:14:59,855 --> 00:15:01,988 -...downtown, Mr. PussyPatter. -Thank you so much for coming today, sir. 299 00:15:02,162 --> 00:15:04,164 [coughing] 300 00:15:04,773 --> 00:15:06,383 Hey, Ant. Uh... 301 00:15:06,557 --> 00:15:08,298 How long you been under there? 302 00:15:10,039 --> 00:15:10,953 I don't know. 303 00:15:13,216 --> 00:15:14,174 Help your boy out. 304 00:15:14,914 --> 00:15:16,916 See if you can get that third stall unclogged, 305 00:15:17,090 --> 00:15:19,005 because one of you, ladies, 306 00:15:19,179 --> 00:15:22,617 has been dropping some real gender neutral logs. 307 00:15:22,791 --> 00:15:24,271 [fast banging] 308 00:15:24,445 --> 00:15:25,750 Yeah... 309 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,752 Oh, yeah, baby! 310 00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:30,842 Here I come to save the day! 311 00:15:31,713 --> 00:15:34,455 Yeah, here I come, alright. 312 00:15:35,499 --> 00:15:36,500 Come on, baby! 313 00:15:36,674 --> 00:15:38,241 [inhales sharply] 314 00:15:38,807 --> 00:15:41,288 -Somebody's getting fired! -It wasn't company Wi-Fi! 315 00:15:41,897 --> 00:15:43,986 Like, when is firing part of my job? 316 00:15:44,682 --> 00:15:46,684 Guys, it's safe sex! 317 00:15:46,858 --> 00:15:51,341 I-- I update Norton's virus protection every week, mostly. 318 00:15:52,038 --> 00:15:54,170 Oh, come on, Harry! 319 00:15:54,344 --> 00:15:57,957 Rent's due, I have a few online subscriptions in collections. 320 00:15:58,131 --> 00:16:01,612 I-- I just put the whole 50 Shadestrilogy 321 00:16:01,786 --> 00:16:03,049 in my Amazon cart! 322 00:16:03,658 --> 00:16:06,052 It was the Gold Box Deal of the Day! 323 00:16:06,748 --> 00:16:08,663 [cries hysterically] 324 00:16:09,751 --> 00:16:14,495 I'm trying to put a Russian co-ed through an American college, man! 325 00:16:15,148 --> 00:16:18,716 And all she has are her precious entrepreneurial... 326 00:16:19,848 --> 00:16:21,502 ...booty videos. 327 00:16:22,459 --> 00:16:23,983 [cries hysterically] 328 00:16:25,462 --> 00:16:26,550 What are you talking about? 329 00:16:28,552 --> 00:16:30,946 Wait. What are-- what are you talking about? 330 00:16:31,860 --> 00:16:34,558 Laurie Caldwell. The boss says I need to fire her. 331 00:16:34,732 --> 00:16:36,473 I've never fired anyone before! 332 00:16:36,647 --> 00:16:37,822 Wait. 333 00:16:38,432 --> 00:16:40,912 You're area HR, and you've never fired? 334 00:16:41,522 --> 00:16:43,089 [laughs] 335 00:16:43,654 --> 00:16:46,396 Well, got a real whale dick to bust your cherry. 336 00:16:46,570 --> 00:16:48,659 [laughs] Yo! 337 00:16:49,965 --> 00:16:52,533 Laurie, right? Laurie Loophole? 338 00:16:53,229 --> 00:16:56,363 Yeah, they've been trying to fire her for, like, seven years. 339 00:16:58,887 --> 00:17:01,194 Ami's been through eight area HR managers 340 00:17:01,368 --> 00:17:03,152 who all, quote, "Fired Laurie." 341 00:17:03,805 --> 00:17:06,242 But every time, she's come back with a lawsuit settlement 342 00:17:06,415 --> 00:17:07,590 and a big-ass pay raise. 343 00:17:08,853 --> 00:17:11,464 ♪ Laurie Loophole finds a way ♪ 344 00:17:11,638 --> 00:17:14,381 ♪ To get that, get that get that pay! Oh! ♪ 345 00:17:16,948 --> 00:17:19,255 You know, like the ruple? 346 00:17:19,907 --> 00:17:21,823 [phone rings] 347 00:17:21,997 --> 00:17:24,565 Mom, I have great news. 348 00:17:24,739 --> 00:17:27,046 [Dylan's mom] Oh, that's wonderful, Dilly-Dilly! 349 00:17:27,220 --> 00:17:29,178 Steve and I have good news too! 350 00:17:29,352 --> 00:17:31,485 -Pop! -[Miles' pop] Boy, why is you yelling? 351 00:17:31,659 --> 00:17:32,921 I got great news, pop. 352 00:17:33,095 --> 00:17:35,097 Oh, I got something for you too! 353 00:17:35,271 --> 00:17:37,143 -They selected me for a promotion! -I was selected for a promotion. 354 00:17:37,317 --> 00:17:38,970 -Well, I mean, I'm a finalist, but... -Well, I'm a finalist, 355 00:17:39,145 --> 00:17:41,582 -it's me and this Black guy. -...it's me and this White dude. 356 00:17:41,756 --> 00:17:43,279 [Miles' pop] Ooh... 357 00:17:43,453 --> 00:17:47,196 -What this mean, "Ooh"? -Come on, son. 358 00:17:47,370 --> 00:17:50,808 Don't be ignorant. It means your Black-ass ain't got no chance. 359 00:17:50,982 --> 00:17:53,594 Just because he's Black, doesn't mean that I-- 360 00:17:53,768 --> 00:17:55,813 [Dylan's mom] Oh, come on, Dilly-Dilly. 361 00:17:55,987 --> 00:17:57,946 You know how they treat Blacks now! 362 00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:02,429 All the reversed racism as is, and discriminated lawsuits. 363 00:18:02,603 --> 00:18:04,344 Oh, God. 364 00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:06,172 But I'm good at what I do. 365 00:18:06,346 --> 00:18:08,130 [Miles' pop] Boy, you ain't shit! 366 00:18:08,304 --> 00:18:10,698 I'm a gardener. Your granddaddy was a gardener. 367 00:18:10,872 --> 00:18:13,570 Hell, it's probably some old slave, cotton fields DNA shit. 368 00:18:13,744 --> 00:18:16,051 Word. That's how DNA works, Pop? 369 00:18:16,225 --> 00:18:17,835 [Dylan's mom] You're the smartest cookie on the planet, 370 00:18:18,009 --> 00:18:20,055 but minorities don't have to be as smart 371 00:18:20,229 --> 00:18:21,839 or as talented to get ahead. 372 00:18:22,013 --> 00:18:23,580 It's a colored man's world. 373 00:18:23,754 --> 00:18:25,278 We're just lucky to get gravity. 374 00:18:25,843 --> 00:18:27,193 But I'm good. 375 00:18:27,671 --> 00:18:30,631 You're good, but you're not Black. 376 00:18:31,849 --> 00:18:34,025 [Miles' pop] You're doing good, but don't fool yourself. 377 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:35,592 It's in the White man's garden. 378 00:18:35,766 --> 00:18:37,290 And we just handle their manure. 379 00:18:37,464 --> 00:18:38,726 [Dylan's mom] For my good news, 380 00:18:38,900 --> 00:18:41,076 Steve and I are selling the house! 381 00:18:41,946 --> 00:18:43,600 What do you mean, "Selling the house"? 382 00:18:43,905 --> 00:18:45,559 Dad bought that land. 383 00:18:45,733 --> 00:18:47,387 He built the house from the first brick. 384 00:18:47,561 --> 00:18:50,433 Oh, I know, I know, but Steve wants to take me 385 00:18:50,607 --> 00:18:52,914 to sail the Mexicos. We need the money. 386 00:18:53,088 --> 00:18:55,482 I told him I am not eating chimichangas all day, 387 00:18:55,656 --> 00:18:57,179 -but-- -Fuck Steve! 388 00:18:57,353 --> 00:18:58,702 Hey...[scoffs] 389 00:18:59,442 --> 00:19:01,749 Steve was there for me after your dad passed. 390 00:19:02,358 --> 00:19:03,185 My dad. 391 00:19:04,404 --> 00:19:05,970 Your husband! 392 00:19:06,536 --> 00:19:08,364 30 years, remember? 393 00:19:08,538 --> 00:19:10,932 [Miles' pop] Oh, Mr. Rubin from the center called. 394 00:19:11,106 --> 00:19:13,717 Said the donations dried up and they have to close the doors. 395 00:19:13,891 --> 00:19:17,156 What? When was this? If they close, those kids will be on the streets. 396 00:19:17,330 --> 00:19:20,507 -Their biz, not mine. -My tech kids have been busting their asses 397 00:19:20,681 --> 00:19:22,291 for the Robo-Tech Competition next month, 398 00:19:22,465 --> 00:19:24,337 and they were building a kids' size Voltron. 399 00:19:24,511 --> 00:19:25,903 He said unless you come up 400 00:19:26,077 --> 00:19:27,992 with the entry and transport fees, 401 00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:31,387 -y'all have to withdraw. -Those kids' future depends on this. 402 00:19:31,561 --> 00:19:33,520 -I'll get the money. -I'm gonna get the money. 403 00:19:33,998 --> 00:19:36,436 -I'm gonna get that promotion. -I'm gonna get that promotion. 404 00:19:38,786 --> 00:19:40,962 [machine whirring] 405 00:19:41,528 --> 00:19:43,007 -Have you been working out? -No. 406 00:19:43,791 --> 00:19:47,360 -Been on any good dates lately? -Like with real women? Also no. 407 00:19:48,317 --> 00:19:52,278 Well, what if I set you up with this spicy little Latin number? 408 00:19:52,452 --> 00:19:54,149 Is this some sort of green card scam? 409 00:19:54,323 --> 00:19:56,020 No, God, no. 410 00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:58,197 She is super American. 411 00:20:01,983 --> 00:20:04,028 -How American? -Like... 412 00:20:04,464 --> 00:20:07,336 watching Pitch Perfectwith a cold slice of pumpkin pie... 413 00:20:07,510 --> 00:20:09,773 [both] And a dollop of cinnamon whipped cream! 414 00:20:09,947 --> 00:20:11,514 [both laugh] 415 00:20:11,688 --> 00:20:14,691 Well, make sure she's got the spicy, 416 00:20:14,865 --> 00:20:18,129 because I got the curry for sure-y. 417 00:20:18,304 --> 00:20:21,132 -Chic-chica! -[distorted voice] Oh, yeah! 418 00:20:22,525 --> 00:20:25,224 I don't fucking get it. 419 00:20:26,094 --> 00:20:29,053 There's money and there's bullshit. 420 00:20:29,402 --> 00:20:31,230 Which one do you think I prefer to talk about? 421 00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:33,493 I'm not my dad. 422 00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:35,234 [suspenseful music] 423 00:20:35,408 --> 00:20:37,497 First things first. Lainee, crack run. 424 00:20:37,671 --> 00:20:40,064 My usual. Don't make my day any worse. 425 00:20:40,630 --> 00:20:42,502 [Lainee hums] 426 00:20:43,372 --> 00:20:45,679 I don't have time for all the formalities. 427 00:20:46,375 --> 00:20:48,072 So, I merged your two interviews together. 428 00:20:48,769 --> 00:20:50,597 You have three words or less, 429 00:20:50,771 --> 00:20:51,989 preferably less, 430 00:20:52,163 --> 00:20:53,513 to tell me why you want the job. 431 00:20:54,557 --> 00:20:57,038 No fake work bullshit, okay? Go. 432 00:20:57,778 --> 00:21:01,477 Uh... Mom selling dad! 433 00:21:01,651 --> 00:21:04,741 [music intensifies] 434 00:21:04,915 --> 00:21:06,003 Center shut down! 435 00:21:07,701 --> 00:21:11,139 First, second. Though, you were both so underwhelming. 436 00:21:11,313 --> 00:21:15,186 You know what? I don't need another soft-ass Will. 437 00:21:15,361 --> 00:21:17,667 I need a fucking killer. 438 00:21:18,233 --> 00:21:20,757 Someone that's going to help this company hide a body... 439 00:21:21,845 --> 00:21:22,977 if we need to. 440 00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:26,763 -Maybe I misjudged-- -[phone buzzing] 441 00:21:27,677 --> 00:21:29,113 Hey, Jim. 442 00:21:30,158 --> 00:21:33,074 Good to hear from you too! You both failed. 443 00:21:34,641 --> 00:21:36,904 That means get the fuck out! 444 00:21:37,948 --> 00:21:40,516 Oh, so sad about Will. 445 00:21:40,690 --> 00:21:43,693 Yeah, we're all still just reeling over here. 446 00:21:44,303 --> 00:21:46,566 I can't stop crying... Yeah. 447 00:21:47,088 --> 00:21:49,264 [whimsical music] 448 00:21:50,134 --> 00:21:51,266 Okay. 449 00:21:52,006 --> 00:21:54,835 It's okay, alright? Peop-- People get fired every day. 450 00:21:55,009 --> 00:21:58,447 If the boss wants her fired... "You're out of here!" 451 00:21:59,448 --> 00:22:01,320 Better her than me. 452 00:22:01,494 --> 00:22:03,670 I do my job, and I do it damn good. 453 00:22:03,844 --> 00:22:06,847 Ever since little Harry was second grade pencil sharpening monitor. 454 00:22:07,021 --> 00:22:09,153 You think anybody had any pencil pokes that year? Any lead poisoning? 455 00:22:09,328 --> 00:22:11,721 Not on my watch. Not on my watch! 456 00:22:12,243 --> 00:22:13,506 -Brendan! -Gah! 457 00:22:13,810 --> 00:22:17,118 Uh, your speech, it was inspiring, 458 00:22:17,292 --> 00:22:19,120 it got my adrenaline pumping. 459 00:22:19,294 --> 00:22:21,862 Um, you have something... 460 00:22:25,431 --> 00:22:26,954 No, it's-- 461 00:22:27,955 --> 00:22:29,870 -Still? -Uh, it's more... 462 00:22:30,044 --> 00:22:31,262 What, man? 463 00:22:34,135 --> 00:22:35,049 [gasps] 464 00:22:37,181 --> 00:22:38,879 You need to run harassment training today. 465 00:22:39,053 --> 00:22:39,967 I need to mask up... 466 00:22:41,838 --> 00:22:43,623 and then go fire a bitch. 467 00:22:44,101 --> 00:22:45,364 [stapler clicks] 468 00:22:46,669 --> 00:22:48,062 It couldn't be that bad. 469 00:22:49,368 --> 00:22:51,718 Bad is driving your dad's car into the Whomping Willow. 470 00:22:51,892 --> 00:22:53,197 I'd take that over this any day. 471 00:22:54,024 --> 00:22:57,637 It's like Harry playing Quidditch without his Firebolt. 472 00:22:58,072 --> 00:23:00,248 Damn! Seriously? 473 00:23:01,292 --> 00:23:04,818 I could've done better selling Black Lives Matter shirts at a tea party rally. 474 00:23:04,992 --> 00:23:08,343 If it means anything, Ami said I came in first. 475 00:23:08,517 --> 00:23:09,475 Aight! 476 00:23:09,649 --> 00:23:10,911 Nah, brah. 477 00:23:13,130 --> 00:23:16,612 Bro! You know, when you have sex with a new female, 478 00:23:17,265 --> 00:23:19,572 you don't even recognize your own cock anymore. 479 00:23:19,746 --> 00:23:21,835 Yo, what the fuck are you talking about? 480 00:23:22,401 --> 00:23:25,012 We got to get extra hard, papi! 481 00:23:25,186 --> 00:23:28,755 Fuck being a field nigga! It's Birth of a Nation time, master! 482 00:23:28,929 --> 00:23:32,236 And we're ready for all you motherfuckers! 483 00:23:32,411 --> 00:23:35,588 We built this nation. It's time we take it back. 484 00:23:37,241 --> 00:23:39,722 -What do you mean? -I mean, look at them. 485 00:23:40,288 --> 00:23:43,247 Conspiring, thinking what else they can steal. 486 00:23:43,900 --> 00:23:45,206 Not this time, Kunta. 487 00:23:45,772 --> 00:23:47,513 Them ankles are mine, boy! 488 00:23:47,687 --> 00:23:49,950 We're about to make this office great again. 489 00:23:50,124 --> 00:23:51,212 Nigga... 490 00:23:51,821 --> 00:23:53,997 White people have been playing dirty for... 491 00:23:55,608 --> 00:23:57,218 Well, literally for fucking ever. 492 00:23:57,392 --> 00:23:59,525 And that's why they have power everywhere. 493 00:23:59,699 --> 00:24:01,831 Why do you think they're not in power anywhere? 494 00:24:02,397 --> 00:24:04,921 Cheating and crying only gets you so far. 495 00:24:05,487 --> 00:24:07,663 -But before he can steal from you... -We need to... 496 00:24:07,837 --> 00:24:09,926 ...sabotage him and get you back in the hunt. 497 00:24:10,100 --> 00:24:11,537 -Huh? -You want to save... 498 00:24:11,711 --> 00:24:12,973 ...your dad's house, right? 499 00:24:14,801 --> 00:24:16,585 -I don't know. -It doesn't seem right. 500 00:24:17,368 --> 00:24:20,371 -Right ain't going to... -...keep the kids in the center and off the streets, papa. 501 00:24:20,937 --> 00:24:24,158 Look, I'm not talking about killing the guy... 502 00:24:24,332 --> 00:24:25,812 ...unless you're ready to take it there, homie. 503 00:24:25,986 --> 00:24:27,378 -I don't-- -No. 504 00:24:27,944 --> 00:24:29,163 Just playing. 505 00:24:29,729 --> 00:24:32,427 We're just going to kill any equal opportunity bullshit. 506 00:24:32,601 --> 00:24:35,343 Little reparations for everything they did to our ancestors, dawg! 507 00:24:36,039 --> 00:24:38,477 -Whip cracking reform! -[drawer slams] 508 00:24:38,651 --> 00:24:41,392 Mental warfare, nigga! 509 00:24:41,567 --> 00:24:45,092 Storm the beaches of their cerebral cortezzz. 510 00:24:45,962 --> 00:24:47,921 We make him look bad at work... 511 00:24:48,095 --> 00:24:50,619 ...so you get another shot at the promotion, my G. 512 00:24:51,185 --> 00:24:52,403 For your Dad. 513 00:24:52,882 --> 00:24:55,929 Para los niños... 514 00:24:57,974 --> 00:24:58,801 Yeah. 515 00:25:01,108 --> 00:25:01,978 Okay. 516 00:25:03,937 --> 00:25:05,460 [engines rumble] 517 00:25:05,634 --> 00:25:09,508 [acoustic guitar strumming] 518 00:25:12,685 --> 00:25:14,774 [coins jangling] 519 00:25:15,992 --> 00:25:18,125 Hey, I'm not a starving artist. 520 00:25:18,299 --> 00:25:19,387 I'm just nibbly. 521 00:25:19,735 --> 00:25:21,345 [scoffs] Whatever, bro. 522 00:25:22,085 --> 00:25:23,957 [gentle guitar music] 523 00:25:26,220 --> 00:25:29,397 Bob! Peach bellini partini! 524 00:25:29,963 --> 00:25:32,139 -Uh, it's actually Tom. -But don't forget to tip, Bob. 525 00:25:32,313 --> 00:25:33,314 [clicks tongue] 526 00:25:35,708 --> 00:25:38,319 -Laurie? -It's Lainee. 527 00:25:38,493 --> 00:25:41,278 -Oh, it says Laurie on the cup. -Oh, "The cup says." 528 00:25:41,452 --> 00:25:44,020 -What does my birth certificate know? -I don't know. 529 00:25:45,935 --> 00:25:47,458 What the hell is this? 530 00:25:48,416 --> 00:25:50,810 [suspenseful music] 531 00:25:50,984 --> 00:25:51,898 [phone smashes] 532 00:25:52,072 --> 00:25:53,508 I'll tell you what it's not. 533 00:25:53,682 --> 00:25:55,249 It's not what my boss ordered! 534 00:25:55,815 --> 00:25:58,078 Tell me. I was gonna look at your name tag, 535 00:25:58,252 --> 00:26:01,124 but your identity isn't worth a single second of my life. 536 00:26:01,298 --> 00:26:02,865 I'm just gonna call you, "Guy." 537 00:26:03,039 --> 00:26:04,171 Got it, guy? 538 00:26:05,694 --> 00:26:07,522 -Guy, do you hate me? -No... 539 00:26:07,696 --> 00:26:10,307 -[both laugh] -Guy, do you want me to lose my internship? 540 00:26:10,481 --> 00:26:14,311 Huh? Drop out of college. Inevitably end up with a crippling meth addiction. 541 00:26:14,877 --> 00:26:16,531 That pushes me into selling this sweet ass 542 00:26:16,705 --> 00:26:18,881 in some bottom-feeding corner in a redneck trailer park, 543 00:26:19,055 --> 00:26:22,798 where drugs will end my precious little life, before I even drive a car, 544 00:26:22,972 --> 00:26:25,018 or worse, kiss a boy for the first time! 545 00:26:25,192 --> 00:26:26,802 Is that you want, guy? 546 00:26:27,498 --> 00:26:30,110 Then make me the single shot, double drip, cream-dream supreme 547 00:26:30,284 --> 00:26:32,678 with a triple pump, sugar free, fructose blend, 548 00:26:32,852 --> 00:26:34,767 one half almond, one half lactose cream, 549 00:26:34,941 --> 00:26:37,247 93 degree caramel macchiato, that I ordered! 550 00:26:37,421 --> 00:26:39,075 [dishes clattering] 551 00:26:40,250 --> 00:26:42,731 [intense music] 552 00:26:42,905 --> 00:26:44,037 [steamer whirs] 553 00:26:48,650 --> 00:26:49,869 Do you want whip on that? 554 00:26:52,785 --> 00:26:55,178 -[whistling] -[sharp thud] 555 00:26:57,224 --> 00:26:59,182 [robber] Not going to stop this, big boy. 556 00:26:59,487 --> 00:27:02,621 Alright, everybody. Get your hippy bracelet hands in the air now. 557 00:27:02,795 --> 00:27:05,493 I mean, get on the ground! 558 00:27:06,146 --> 00:27:07,060 Now! 559 00:27:10,019 --> 00:27:13,588 [western style music] 560 00:27:25,905 --> 00:27:26,775 [stapler clicks] 561 00:27:28,255 --> 00:27:29,560 [tape dispenser clicks] 562 00:27:48,623 --> 00:27:50,233 Nice doing business with you, Mr. Zangang. 563 00:27:50,407 --> 00:27:51,670 I'll see you tomorrow, at eight, okay? 564 00:27:51,844 --> 00:27:52,975 [chuckles] All right. 565 00:27:55,325 --> 00:27:57,501 What the fuck? The fuck wrong with this phone, man? 566 00:27:57,676 --> 00:27:59,286 Get the fuck off my ear, man! 567 00:27:59,939 --> 00:28:01,984 Hey, man! Hey, hey, hey! 568 00:28:02,376 --> 00:28:04,247 Hey-- Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Not you, Mr. Zangang! 569 00:28:04,421 --> 00:28:06,772 Oh, you still on the phone? [chuckles] 570 00:28:06,946 --> 00:28:09,165 I didn't mean that shit, you know what I'm saying? I ju-- 571 00:28:09,339 --> 00:28:11,298 Did I say "shit"? I'm sorry, Mr. Zan-- 572 00:28:11,472 --> 00:28:14,388 Uh, yeah. It's just, you know, with a little more-- 573 00:28:14,562 --> 00:28:17,130 just a little business that I got to attend to. 574 00:28:17,783 --> 00:28:20,394 It's all good, Mr. Zan-- how about you hang up first? 575 00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:22,265 ♪ I don't trust no hoe ♪ 576 00:28:22,439 --> 00:28:23,702 ♪ I don't be trusting a hoe ♪ 577 00:28:23,876 --> 00:28:25,486 ♪ I don't be trusting a hoe ♪ 578 00:28:25,660 --> 00:28:26,966 ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ 579 00:28:27,444 --> 00:28:30,273 ["No Love" by XUAVE] 580 00:29:26,242 --> 00:29:29,637 ["No Love" by XUAVE continues] 581 00:29:34,294 --> 00:29:35,991 [electric buzzing] 582 00:29:36,949 --> 00:29:38,428 [music fades] 583 00:29:38,602 --> 00:29:39,995 [electric buzzing] 584 00:29:40,909 --> 00:29:43,477 [whimsical music] 585 00:29:50,658 --> 00:29:51,702 [whooshing] 586 00:29:54,488 --> 00:29:57,230 [heavy metal music] 587 00:30:05,629 --> 00:30:07,980 [music fades] 588 00:30:10,156 --> 00:30:11,810 Tyrone! 589 00:30:13,072 --> 00:30:14,377 What's up, my nigga? 590 00:30:14,987 --> 00:30:15,814 Nothing. 591 00:30:20,470 --> 00:30:21,471 You see that? 592 00:30:22,211 --> 00:30:24,692 Did you see that? 593 00:30:26,172 --> 00:30:28,348 I was playing it cool. You dig? 594 00:30:28,696 --> 00:30:30,437 Wasn't even trying to jive, my man! 595 00:30:31,003 --> 00:30:33,788 But racially insensitive words... 596 00:30:33,962 --> 00:30:37,183 "Insensitive words," write it down now! 597 00:30:38,010 --> 00:30:42,579 No matter what tone, make people uncomfortable. 598 00:30:43,929 --> 00:30:47,671 Makes them disengage and feel isolated. 599 00:30:49,978 --> 00:30:53,634 Tyrone immediately retreated to Twitter, 600 00:30:54,461 --> 00:30:55,723 begging for a hug. 601 00:30:57,072 --> 00:31:01,207 Probably tormented with thoughts of his grandparents 602 00:31:01,381 --> 00:31:03,426 being whipped on the plantation! 603 00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:05,167 Or of his pops... 604 00:31:05,733 --> 00:31:07,735 running out on his crackhead Mom, 605 00:31:08,605 --> 00:31:11,695 only to be shot by some honky-tonk cop! 606 00:31:12,566 --> 00:31:15,786 -All lives matter, Tim? -[glass smashes] 607 00:31:15,961 --> 00:31:19,225 My parents are with my grandparents, on a cruise in the Bahamas. 608 00:31:20,269 --> 00:31:23,577 [sighs] Slave ship genetics? I get it. 609 00:31:25,579 --> 00:31:29,888 And that's why there's no room for racist, 610 00:31:30,062 --> 00:31:32,412 -bigoted stereotyping... -[phone chimes] 611 00:31:33,065 --> 00:31:34,718 ...comments or jokes. 612 00:31:34,893 --> 00:31:36,111 [Juan chuckles] 613 00:31:37,547 --> 00:31:40,115 Oh... [stutters] Excuse me, homes. 614 00:31:40,289 --> 00:31:42,465 You got a problem, Juan? 615 00:31:42,639 --> 00:31:44,772 Because unless you Juan't one, 616 00:31:44,946 --> 00:31:46,817 you better tell me what the fuck is up! 617 00:31:47,296 --> 00:31:49,168 Nothing, man. It's just my little brother. 618 00:31:49,342 --> 00:31:51,170 He's just talking shit, because he won his science fair 619 00:31:51,344 --> 00:31:53,172 I won, like, seven years ago. 620 00:31:53,346 --> 00:31:55,174 [laughter] 621 00:31:55,348 --> 00:31:57,741 [laughing sarcastically] Science fairs... 622 00:31:59,613 --> 00:32:02,224 Science fairs in Mexico? 623 00:32:02,703 --> 00:32:05,575 What kind of pinche gringo do you take me for? 624 00:32:05,749 --> 00:32:08,448 [tense techno music] 625 00:32:08,622 --> 00:32:12,060 These motherfuckers really think they're resilient. 626 00:32:13,453 --> 00:32:16,325 Okay. Time to step the fuck up. 627 00:32:16,891 --> 00:32:20,286 I don't know. I'm getting some real guilty vibes. 628 00:32:20,460 --> 00:32:23,071 I saw Malcolm X flipping me off before I passed out. 629 00:32:23,245 --> 00:32:26,814 -I think we should just drop it. -Drop it? 630 00:32:26,988 --> 00:32:28,816 [scoffs] You just want to drop it? 631 00:32:30,383 --> 00:32:32,211 Did your father just drop the hammer, 632 00:32:32,385 --> 00:32:34,256 when he built a house for his family to live in? 633 00:32:35,083 --> 00:32:37,694 Huh? Now you just don't care. 634 00:32:38,260 --> 00:32:40,306 What? No, I... 635 00:32:41,176 --> 00:32:45,224 think I'm just gonna go to Ami and tell her I was nervous. 636 00:32:46,747 --> 00:32:48,053 Ask for a second chance. 637 00:32:48,227 --> 00:32:49,663 [chuckles and slaps] 638 00:32:50,272 --> 00:32:51,578 Young Dylan, 639 00:32:52,274 --> 00:32:55,495 -you just don't get it. -[whimpers] Ow! 640 00:32:55,669 --> 00:32:57,540 You don't get second shots. 641 00:32:57,714 --> 00:33:00,152 Only those freeloading, half-assed minorities, 642 00:33:00,326 --> 00:33:02,110 who ride the wave of equal opportunity 643 00:33:02,284 --> 00:33:03,372 to get what they want. 644 00:33:04,983 --> 00:33:08,247 So, here's what we're gonna do. 645 00:33:10,075 --> 00:33:13,382 I don't know, bro. Just seems like I should ask Ami for another shot. 646 00:33:13,556 --> 00:33:16,168 All this racial focus is starting to backfire. 647 00:33:16,342 --> 00:33:19,562 Bro, the KKK was in the bathroom earlier. 648 00:33:20,694 --> 00:33:24,828 Exactly, bro. Ex-fucking-actly! 649 00:33:25,003 --> 00:33:27,657 These White motherfuckers still think they can tell us where to shit, 650 00:33:27,831 --> 00:33:29,964 where to eat, how to vote. 651 00:33:30,138 --> 00:33:33,402 Well, today, the whip cracks back. Wha-pssh! 652 00:33:34,490 --> 00:33:37,102 But if I get a second shot and I crush it, it won't matter. 653 00:33:37,276 --> 00:33:40,409 "Won't matter?" "It won't matter?" 654 00:33:40,583 --> 00:33:42,933 [laughs hysterically] 655 00:33:45,110 --> 00:33:47,199 Ha! "Won't matter?" 656 00:33:47,590 --> 00:33:49,766 White people are fucking evil, bro. 657 00:33:50,245 --> 00:33:53,379 Do you think they let the slaves go when they were crushing it in the field? 658 00:33:53,553 --> 00:33:55,511 Do you think they let Martin Luther King live, 659 00:33:55,685 --> 00:33:58,253 when he was crushing it with non-violence? 660 00:33:58,427 --> 00:33:59,950 The only thing they're fucking crushing, 661 00:34:00,125 --> 00:34:02,605 is our opportunity in this country, papa! 662 00:34:03,563 --> 00:34:05,173 I get it, but sometimes hard work 663 00:34:05,347 --> 00:34:07,567 -can really pay off, you just gotta-- -[chuckles] 664 00:34:07,741 --> 00:34:09,351 The ironing. 665 00:34:09,917 --> 00:34:11,658 Wait, do you mean irony? 666 00:34:12,746 --> 00:34:14,617 No wonder you fucking tanked the interview. 667 00:34:15,009 --> 00:34:19,318 Oh, the ironing. Like trying to smooth out a wrinkle situation. 668 00:34:19,492 --> 00:34:22,060 Pshhh! 669 00:34:22,625 --> 00:34:25,672 "The irony." Nobody "ironies" their clothes. 670 00:34:26,063 --> 00:34:26,976 Pshh! 671 00:34:27,761 --> 00:34:28,891 Dumb ass. 672 00:34:29,893 --> 00:34:31,112 [chews loudly] 673 00:34:32,983 --> 00:34:36,639 [suspenseful music] 674 00:34:38,946 --> 00:34:42,254 [Harry] "Laurie, I know you're a hard worker. Maybe too hard. 675 00:34:42,688 --> 00:34:44,908 The company decided to go into a new direction." 676 00:34:45,431 --> 00:34:47,085 [grunts] No. 677 00:34:48,695 --> 00:34:51,524 "This part of the job is always a struggle. 678 00:34:51,958 --> 00:34:55,310 It's never easy to fire someone, especially when that someone 679 00:34:55,484 --> 00:34:57,791 is the someone I'm talking to." Ugh! 680 00:34:59,445 --> 00:35:01,664 "Laurie. You gots to go, bitch!" 681 00:35:02,404 --> 00:35:03,318 [sighs] Yeah. 682 00:35:03,971 --> 00:35:05,190 -Laurie... -Yes? 683 00:35:06,365 --> 00:35:07,757 Hey, I-- 684 00:35:08,584 --> 00:35:09,759 I just, um... 685 00:35:10,847 --> 00:35:12,284 Right? [chuckles] 686 00:35:12,458 --> 00:35:15,983 What? So sad about Will, huh? 687 00:35:16,723 --> 00:35:20,901 Who knew that part of the body could bend that much? 688 00:35:21,380 --> 00:35:24,470 [suspenseful music] 689 00:35:25,645 --> 00:35:26,472 Harry? 690 00:35:28,038 --> 00:35:29,866 [water splattering] 691 00:35:34,175 --> 00:35:38,310 [emotional uplifting music] 692 00:35:38,484 --> 00:35:41,008 ♪ I'm a man ♪ 693 00:35:41,182 --> 00:35:43,358 ♪ Created fire with our hands ♪ 694 00:35:43,532 --> 00:35:46,013 ♪ I'm a man ♪ 695 00:35:46,187 --> 00:35:48,407 ♪ Stole and pillaged many lands ♪ 696 00:35:48,581 --> 00:35:51,323 ♪ I'm a man ♪ 697 00:35:51,497 --> 00:35:53,455 ♪ When I pee, I stand ♪ 698 00:35:53,629 --> 00:35:55,762 ♪ I'm a man, yes, I am♪ 699 00:35:55,936 --> 00:35:59,157 ♪ Yes, I am, I'm a man♪ 700 00:35:59,331 --> 00:36:01,898 ♪ Eve took the first bite Adam still stood beside her ♪ 701 00:36:02,072 --> 00:36:03,900 ♪ Y'all fight for equal rights but call us to kill a spider?♪ 702 00:36:04,074 --> 00:36:06,164 ♪ You think childbirth is hard? We put a man on the moon ♪ 703 00:36:06,338 --> 00:36:09,079 ♪ I'd have like 20 kids a year if you gave me a womb ♪ 704 00:36:09,254 --> 00:36:11,473 ♪ So listen up, huh? Here's how it's going down ♪ 705 00:36:11,647 --> 00:36:13,693 ♪ Laurie, you're fired get the fuck outta town ♪ 706 00:36:13,867 --> 00:36:16,522 ♪ Oh wait, what? You don't know who I am? ♪ 707 00:36:16,696 --> 00:36:18,741 ♪ Trick, looky here I'm a man, I'm a man ♪ 708 00:36:18,915 --> 00:36:25,922 ♪ I'm a maaaaaaaaaaan...♪ 709 00:36:27,924 --> 00:36:32,407 ♪ I'm a man♪ 710 00:36:33,930 --> 00:36:35,323 I'm a man. 711 00:36:39,588 --> 00:36:42,852 [laughter] 712 00:36:43,766 --> 00:36:45,203 Men, right? 713 00:36:45,377 --> 00:36:47,335 According to the sign on the door. 714 00:36:47,509 --> 00:36:51,557 -[laughter] -Yes, yes. Yes! 715 00:36:51,861 --> 00:36:54,777 -Nigga, what the fuck? -What the fuck? N' sync n' shit. 716 00:36:54,951 --> 00:36:57,084 [both sing] ♪ Bye, bye, bye! ♪ 717 00:36:57,650 --> 00:37:00,087 [robber] Let's keep this real nice and easy, everybody. 718 00:37:01,219 --> 00:37:04,265 Guitar man, play me some robbery music. 719 00:37:05,527 --> 00:37:07,007 Come on! 720 00:37:07,790 --> 00:37:09,792 We're gonna take him down. Man up! 721 00:37:09,966 --> 00:37:12,360 Actually, I've been considering a sex change for the past two minutes. 722 00:37:12,534 --> 00:37:14,493 Our insurance place are surprisingly flexible and-- 723 00:37:14,667 --> 00:37:16,973 I'm gonna give you a Tijuana sex change if you don't shut it. 724 00:37:17,147 --> 00:37:18,671 You distract him, I'll disarm him. 725 00:37:18,845 --> 00:37:20,238 Don't freeze. 726 00:37:20,412 --> 00:37:22,370 -[robber] Not the cheap stuff. -[dull thud] 727 00:37:24,459 --> 00:37:26,679 -Who are you? -It ain't Laurie, motherfucker. 728 00:37:26,853 --> 00:37:28,637 [keyboard clicking] 729 00:37:30,030 --> 00:37:32,554 [uptempo techno music] 730 00:37:39,648 --> 00:37:40,649 [groans softly] 731 00:37:43,826 --> 00:37:46,264 [winces] 732 00:37:47,526 --> 00:37:49,092 [winces] 733 00:37:49,267 --> 00:37:51,007 Shit! 734 00:37:53,009 --> 00:37:55,534 -Please, please, don't go, please. -[squelching] 735 00:37:56,883 --> 00:38:00,016 Oh, fuck! Ooh, it's on the tip. 736 00:38:00,843 --> 00:38:03,411 Oh, that's poo poo water. That's diarrhea, baby. 737 00:38:03,585 --> 00:38:05,370 Oh, God help me, please! 738 00:38:05,848 --> 00:38:09,374 -Oh, man. Miles, thank God. -I'm sorry, Shayne. I really gotta go. 739 00:38:09,548 --> 00:38:11,201 Don't laugh, but my shoe got stuck. 740 00:38:11,376 --> 00:38:13,247 We have midday presentations in like, ten minutes. 741 00:38:13,421 --> 00:38:14,988 -I have to go-- I have to go to the bathroom. -Please, please. 742 00:38:15,162 --> 00:38:16,250 [sighs] 743 00:38:18,208 --> 00:38:19,862 -There you go. -And there you go! 744 00:38:20,036 --> 00:38:21,603 What? Oh, my G-- 745 00:38:24,867 --> 00:38:27,609 -Shayne! Shayne! -[handle rattles] 746 00:38:28,218 --> 00:38:30,177 -[loud banging] -I'm trying! 747 00:38:31,178 --> 00:38:33,093 -I think it's stuck! -Come on, Shayne! 748 00:38:33,963 --> 00:38:35,617 Miles, it is stuck! 749 00:38:35,791 --> 00:38:37,445 Stop embarrassing yourself! 750 00:38:39,926 --> 00:38:41,275 [inhales sharply] 751 00:38:41,449 --> 00:38:42,798 Damn it, Shayne! 752 00:38:42,972 --> 00:38:44,800 [groaning] 753 00:38:50,328 --> 00:38:51,764 [groans] 754 00:38:57,204 --> 00:38:58,510 [panting] 755 00:38:58,684 --> 00:38:59,598 [farts loudly] 756 00:38:59,772 --> 00:39:00,729 [groans] 757 00:39:01,817 --> 00:39:03,515 Look... [inhales sharply] 758 00:39:03,689 --> 00:39:05,734 You're a professional trapped in a stairwell. 759 00:39:05,908 --> 00:39:09,999 [groans] It's not like you jumped on some-- nigga, shit! 760 00:39:10,173 --> 00:39:12,828 And opted for a stairwell over a legit bathroom. 761 00:39:13,829 --> 00:39:16,354 You'll get Sanj to clean it up. That's it. 762 00:39:16,528 --> 00:39:18,704 It's not like the stairs are up for a promotion, my nigga. 763 00:39:18,878 --> 00:39:20,445 Oh! 764 00:39:21,663 --> 00:39:24,797 -Woo! Woo! -[poop squelches] 765 00:39:24,971 --> 00:39:26,407 -[groans] -[poop squelches] 766 00:39:28,627 --> 00:39:31,543 Fuck you, shayne! 767 00:39:32,108 --> 00:39:34,154 [panting] 768 00:39:35,721 --> 00:39:36,722 Shit. 769 00:39:41,683 --> 00:39:43,685 -Where you been at, bro? Middays! -I know-- 770 00:39:43,859 --> 00:39:46,601 -Oh, let me grab my-- -Thumb drive! Let's go. 771 00:39:46,775 --> 00:39:50,344 ["West Coast Thang" by Nipsey Hussle feat. KrsTQ & Ill Will] 772 00:39:59,266 --> 00:40:02,051 -Bitch, I need a job! -[giggles] 773 00:40:02,225 --> 00:40:04,576 [both giggle] 774 00:40:05,141 --> 00:40:06,534 -Oi! -How are you? 775 00:40:06,708 --> 00:40:09,232 Mira, bien y tú? Mira, muy bonito. 776 00:40:09,407 --> 00:40:12,758 ♪ María, María ♪ 777 00:40:14,542 --> 00:40:17,763 ♪ She reminds me of a West Side... ♪ 778 00:40:17,937 --> 00:40:19,460 [sniffs] 779 00:40:19,634 --> 00:40:22,332 ♪ ...Story ♪ 780 00:40:24,857 --> 00:40:28,426 So this is the infamous Juan Guapo Hungrod Martinez? 781 00:40:29,165 --> 00:40:31,429 -[grunts] -No way. 782 00:40:31,994 --> 00:40:34,562 -Sí way. -Hmm... 783 00:40:34,736 --> 00:40:37,347 [Latin music] 784 00:40:37,522 --> 00:40:39,741 You don't look totally Latino. 785 00:40:39,915 --> 00:40:42,875 -You mixed with something? -Maybe a little agave, jalapeño... 786 00:40:43,049 --> 00:40:47,532 But other than that... todo Guadalajara. 787 00:40:50,709 --> 00:40:53,799 Okay, well, if you're a real Chicano, answer me this. 788 00:40:53,973 --> 00:40:56,279 -Where's the best place to party in TJ? -Hey, chica. 789 00:40:57,019 --> 00:40:58,586 -I'm gonna stop you right there. -Oh... 790 00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:01,459 Only gringos go to TJ to party. 791 00:41:04,897 --> 00:41:07,116 Okay, let's get real then. 792 00:41:07,465 --> 00:41:09,379 You're planning the guest list for your niece's quinceañera. 793 00:41:09,554 --> 00:41:11,686 Which of the family members get reserved parking? 794 00:41:16,691 --> 00:41:18,171 Backyard or event hall? 795 00:41:18,911 --> 00:41:19,955 Backyard. 796 00:41:22,871 --> 00:41:24,917 -Well? -Nobody. 797 00:41:25,091 --> 00:41:26,571 They all park on the grass. 798 00:41:29,443 --> 00:41:32,054 Well, okay. I guess you really are el jefe. 799 00:41:32,228 --> 00:41:34,143 [chuckles] I told you! 800 00:41:35,971 --> 00:41:37,582 So listen up, mm-kay? 801 00:41:38,234 --> 00:41:39,540 I'm gonna need a volunteer. 802 00:41:40,715 --> 00:41:43,065 Uh, um, uh... 803 00:41:43,239 --> 00:41:45,154 Nanette! Okay. 804 00:41:45,328 --> 00:41:47,156 Why not? Sure, come on up. 805 00:41:49,942 --> 00:41:53,859 [sensual music] 806 00:42:05,305 --> 00:42:07,350 Yeah. Oh, jeez-- 807 00:42:07,960 --> 00:42:09,265 Oh... [chuckles] 808 00:42:10,005 --> 00:42:13,879 [sneezes] So, additional to racism, 809 00:42:14,053 --> 00:42:19,449 there's, uh, sexual and religious her ass... 810 00:42:20,102 --> 00:42:22,061 Her ass-- Harassment! 811 00:42:22,235 --> 00:42:23,323 Harassment! 812 00:42:24,759 --> 00:42:27,762 And obviously, I didn't call Nanette up here to read 813 00:42:27,936 --> 00:42:29,372 The Bible.Am I right? 814 00:42:30,722 --> 00:42:31,810 Good. 815 00:42:32,375 --> 00:42:33,246 Can we speed this up? 816 00:42:34,116 --> 00:42:34,943 Yeah... 817 00:42:35,770 --> 00:42:37,946 So, we all watch sports, right? 818 00:42:38,512 --> 00:42:42,821 What do all the teammates say when someone does a good job? 819 00:42:43,517 --> 00:42:45,301 -Good job. -Right! 820 00:42:45,954 --> 00:42:48,000 Righty-o. Natural athlete. 821 00:42:48,174 --> 00:42:49,567 Three pointer, Tyrone! 822 00:42:50,872 --> 00:42:54,180 And they always follow up with a little gesture... 823 00:42:55,485 --> 00:42:57,923 just to solidify the compliment. 824 00:42:59,359 --> 00:43:01,666 [slaps and moans] Hey, Nannette, 825 00:43:01,840 --> 00:43:04,756 good job on unclogging that printer jam. 826 00:43:05,844 --> 00:43:08,760 -[slaps and moans] Hey, Nanette. -[Juan] Did he just-- was that a slap? 827 00:43:08,934 --> 00:43:11,414 Great job on that presentation today. 828 00:43:14,635 --> 00:43:15,984 You see what's happening here? 829 00:43:16,811 --> 00:43:17,769 We're a team! 830 00:43:19,074 --> 00:43:21,207 Just like any sport, yes? 831 00:43:21,903 --> 00:43:24,689 Sure, our arena is a little different, but... 832 00:43:25,254 --> 00:43:27,300 are we still not trying to win it all? 833 00:43:28,344 --> 00:43:30,433 So, that's why there's nothing wrong... 834 00:43:31,043 --> 00:43:33,741 with cheering your teammates on. 835 00:43:35,177 --> 00:43:36,004 Hey, Nannette. 836 00:43:37,832 --> 00:43:41,357 Marksman-like accuracy on that calendar invite. 837 00:43:41,531 --> 00:43:43,925 -[sighs] Oh... -[sharp thud] 838 00:43:44,099 --> 00:43:45,405 [men] Oh shit! 839 00:43:45,579 --> 00:43:47,450 -[Juan] Oh shit! -[Brendan grunts] Oh! 840 00:43:48,843 --> 00:43:51,759 Right here. If we expand our target audience, 841 00:43:51,933 --> 00:43:54,675 we could see a 45% jump 842 00:43:54,849 --> 00:43:56,764 in overall revenue for that sector. 843 00:43:58,026 --> 00:44:00,463 -[Lady Fiya] Oh... -[gasps] 844 00:44:00,638 --> 00:44:03,379 -Lady Fiya, we're going to cool you off. -Uh... This isn't mine. 845 00:44:03,553 --> 00:44:05,120 Kind of hard to cool off a... hot girl! 846 00:44:05,294 --> 00:44:07,949 -Uh... [chuckles nervously] -[rock music plays on TV] 847 00:44:08,123 --> 00:44:10,517 -Uh, uh... [chuckles nervously] -What's wrong, boys? 848 00:44:10,691 --> 00:44:12,824 -Too much ass-phyxiation? -Uh... 849 00:44:19,004 --> 00:44:21,528 [sniffs] Smell like shit. 850 00:44:24,487 --> 00:44:27,055 ♪ Roll, roll, roll your blunt ♪ 851 00:44:27,229 --> 00:44:29,231 ♪ Then you let it steam ♪ 852 00:44:29,579 --> 00:44:31,712 ♪ Pass it over to your friend ♪ 853 00:44:33,061 --> 00:44:34,715 Oh, hell, no. They ain't getting none of this. 854 00:44:35,324 --> 00:44:36,238 Mm. 855 00:44:37,805 --> 00:44:41,026 -[dull thuds] -[all] Damn! Damn! 856 00:44:41,200 --> 00:44:45,508 Here's one! When is it acceptable to touch a co-worker's privates? 857 00:44:45,857 --> 00:44:48,773 When your shoe is turning his baby nuts into Gerbers! 858 00:44:49,121 --> 00:44:52,124 -[dull thuds] -[man 1] Oh, damn son! 859 00:44:52,298 --> 00:44:55,170 -[indistinct yelling] -[man 2] I told your ass! I told-- 860 00:44:55,344 --> 00:44:57,216 -Drink more protein! -[man 1] Woo! 861 00:44:58,260 --> 00:44:59,174 [Tyrone] Dang! 862 00:45:00,001 --> 00:45:01,002 Tim... 863 00:45:02,830 --> 00:45:03,701 [sighs] 864 00:45:06,573 --> 00:45:07,487 He did it. 865 00:45:09,097 --> 00:45:11,621 When I left my office, he fucking did it! 866 00:45:11,796 --> 00:45:13,188 What are you talking about? 867 00:45:13,798 --> 00:45:16,104 -Besides, I'm more of a MILF chaser. -[laughs hysterically] 868 00:45:16,278 --> 00:45:20,282 Great! One of my candidates is a porn junkie, 869 00:45:20,456 --> 00:45:22,676 and the other is on CP time. 870 00:45:22,850 --> 00:45:26,332 -She did it! She trapped me in the stairwell! -Moi? 871 00:45:26,680 --> 00:45:29,161 Hey, guys. I'm sure that a virus just attached itself 872 00:45:29,335 --> 00:45:31,163 to Dylan's presentation, and those stairwell doors, 873 00:45:31,337 --> 00:45:34,253 -they get jammed all the time. We just need to fix them. -Enough! 874 00:45:34,427 --> 00:45:36,298 -[both] But he did it! -[phone buzzes] 875 00:45:36,864 --> 00:45:38,213 Hey, Jim! 876 00:45:39,301 --> 00:45:41,303 My dad's cabin? Right now? 877 00:45:41,477 --> 00:45:44,219 Sure, no problem. I'll send you the code. 878 00:45:45,394 --> 00:45:46,961 Will's replacement... 879 00:45:48,006 --> 00:45:49,921 The guys I told you about that-- 880 00:45:52,532 --> 00:45:54,316 Sure. I'll send them. 881 00:45:56,362 --> 00:46:00,018 And if they screw up, they're done all together. 882 00:46:01,323 --> 00:46:03,064 [water rushes] 883 00:46:04,892 --> 00:46:07,547 Um, sorry about that, earlier, Laurie. 884 00:46:08,417 --> 00:46:09,288 I'm a man. 885 00:46:09,636 --> 00:46:12,900 [laughs hysterically] 886 00:46:13,074 --> 00:46:16,643 And as such, there are certain responsibilities 887 00:46:16,817 --> 00:46:18,645 that a man such as myself, 888 00:46:18,819 --> 00:46:21,822 in a position such as mine must take. 889 00:46:22,257 --> 00:46:24,085 Laurie, you've been with the company, 890 00:46:24,259 --> 00:46:25,826 what, nine years now? 891 00:46:26,261 --> 00:46:28,655 -And lately-- -Hold that thought, Harry. 892 00:46:28,829 --> 00:46:30,962 -Cramps. -[pen clatters] 893 00:46:31,527 --> 00:46:33,399 Uh, okay. Yeah, sure. 894 00:46:34,008 --> 00:46:36,315 -Sure, sure. -[loud thud] 895 00:46:37,664 --> 00:46:39,840 [exhales sharply] Halfway there. 896 00:46:40,449 --> 00:46:42,147 Not so bad. 897 00:46:42,625 --> 00:46:44,149 Whale dick... [blows raspberry] 898 00:46:44,976 --> 00:46:46,368 I'm a man. 899 00:46:46,847 --> 00:46:49,284 I will take that whale dick, shove it right in my mouth. 900 00:46:49,458 --> 00:46:52,113 and just... [fast gnawing] 901 00:46:53,071 --> 00:46:57,640 -[Laurie] Oh, my God. Harry, I'm pregnant. -[dramatic musical sting] 902 00:46:58,424 --> 00:47:02,297 -Fuck! -Yeah, that's normally how it works with, uh... 903 00:47:06,214 --> 00:47:08,738 [moaning] 904 00:47:08,913 --> 00:47:10,044 Aah! 905 00:47:10,218 --> 00:47:12,351 [gentle lullaby] 906 00:47:12,525 --> 00:47:14,483 -Congrat-- okay. -Hi! 907 00:47:14,657 --> 00:47:16,311 -Uh, be-- be right-- -Mama! 908 00:47:16,485 --> 00:47:19,358 He-he! Hi! 909 00:47:20,446 --> 00:47:22,013 [dramatic musical sting] 910 00:47:22,709 --> 00:47:24,015 [gasps] 911 00:47:25,843 --> 00:47:28,280 [frantic music] 912 00:47:28,454 --> 00:47:30,456 I'm a ma-- 913 00:47:31,065 --> 00:47:32,066 [dull thud] 914 00:47:33,328 --> 00:47:34,590 [birds chirping] 915 00:47:34,764 --> 00:47:36,375 Man, these fuckers are scandalous. 916 00:47:36,549 --> 00:47:38,116 This whole time, we were trying to get them, 917 00:47:38,290 --> 00:47:39,508 they were getting us. 918 00:47:39,682 --> 00:47:41,641 I was trying to be nice, but fuck that. 919 00:47:41,815 --> 00:47:44,035 We need to rip these motherfuckers' hearts out. 920 00:47:44,209 --> 00:47:46,820 Scandalous-ass White folks, always trying to hold somebody Black! 921 00:47:47,342 --> 00:47:49,344 Man, they wanted a nigga? A nigga here now! 922 00:47:49,518 --> 00:47:51,346 -[Lonzo] How here are you, bro? -Right here! 923 00:47:51,520 --> 00:47:55,133 Shady-ass Black people, always trying to get over. 924 00:47:55,611 --> 00:47:57,962 Okay, well, here come the colonizers. 925 00:47:58,136 --> 00:48:01,922 [Shayne] Now you're talking, daddy. Big Dick style. 926 00:48:02,096 --> 00:48:04,098 -[Lonzo] Are you sure you're ready, dawg? -What you got? 927 00:48:04,272 --> 00:48:05,883 Papi,let's just say, by the time 928 00:48:06,057 --> 00:48:07,841 you're getting cozy in your new office, 929 00:48:08,015 --> 00:48:11,105 a celly is going to be getting cozy in Dylan's ass. 930 00:48:11,845 --> 00:48:15,501 -How you gonna do that? -Wakanda forever! 931 00:48:16,371 --> 00:48:19,200 What is every Black man's kryptonite? 932 00:48:20,332 --> 00:48:22,900 Black and milds? Rims? 933 00:48:23,726 --> 00:48:26,947 -Gold chains? Uh, Timberlands? -Okay, okay. Ssh. 934 00:48:31,343 --> 00:48:34,694 Let's just hope Miles converts to prison ball sacks 935 00:48:34,868 --> 00:48:39,220 as easily as you do to your new tax bracket. 936 00:48:41,353 --> 00:48:43,311 -[lips pop] -I like it. 937 00:48:43,485 --> 00:48:44,443 Go. 938 00:48:44,791 --> 00:48:47,098 Go and take back our country! 939 00:48:51,841 --> 00:48:54,932 [suspenseful music] 940 00:48:57,499 --> 00:48:59,240 [birds chirping] 941 00:49:03,723 --> 00:49:04,593 [door shuts] 942 00:49:24,918 --> 00:49:27,486 Fuck! I already hate this fucking place. 943 00:49:30,576 --> 00:49:32,056 Cabin in the woods... 944 00:49:38,105 --> 00:49:40,325 -Damn it, man. No signal! -[chimes bell] 945 00:49:40,673 --> 00:49:42,066 [door creaks] 946 00:49:48,028 --> 00:49:50,248 [wood creaking] 947 00:49:54,643 --> 00:49:56,863 Shit. Out of my way, racist! 948 00:49:57,037 --> 00:49:58,778 -Your mom's a fucking racist. -What? 949 00:49:59,866 --> 00:50:01,911 -Oh, hi, guys. -Mandy? 950 00:50:03,565 --> 00:50:04,740 How'd you roll up here? 951 00:50:06,829 --> 00:50:08,831 Freeze, dirt turkeys! 952 00:50:09,310 --> 00:50:11,573 -Ready? -No. 953 00:50:12,313 --> 00:50:13,923 -Too bad! -Aw! 954 00:50:14,098 --> 00:50:15,055 -[robber] Ah! -[gunshot] 955 00:50:16,839 --> 00:50:18,276 [muffled thud] 956 00:50:19,407 --> 00:50:21,888 [ethereal melancholic music] 957 00:50:23,672 --> 00:50:25,544 I told you your name wasn't important. 958 00:50:25,718 --> 00:50:27,154 Rest easy, guy. 959 00:50:27,720 --> 00:50:28,634 Who is this asshole? 960 00:50:29,374 --> 00:50:32,203 He... was... guy! 961 00:50:32,377 --> 00:50:35,684 [grunting and spluttering] 962 00:50:35,858 --> 00:50:38,122 -That was my boss' drink! -[robber cries] 963 00:50:38,644 --> 00:50:39,949 [groans] 964 00:50:45,781 --> 00:50:46,652 Jim? 965 00:50:48,480 --> 00:50:50,525 -Mandy! Hey! -Hey! 966 00:50:51,352 --> 00:50:54,486 -[Jim] Ha-ha! -[Mandy giggles] 967 00:50:54,660 --> 00:50:56,009 -Hey, Jim. -Dylan Kirkpatrick, pleas-- 968 00:50:56,183 --> 00:50:57,750 I'm Miles Fuller, Ami said-- 969 00:50:57,924 --> 00:51:00,318 -As your account repre-- -Hey, I really want to tell-- 970 00:51:00,492 --> 00:51:02,450 Let's cut the crap, fellas. This here is real simple. 971 00:51:02,624 --> 00:51:04,452 -Let's rack... -[gun cocks] 972 00:51:04,626 --> 00:51:05,540 ...and track. 973 00:51:06,280 --> 00:51:07,890 Sorry, Jim. No signal! 974 00:51:08,065 --> 00:51:09,718 That's not the gear. 975 00:51:09,892 --> 00:51:12,373 [whimsical music] 976 00:51:15,420 --> 00:51:17,465 [loud gunshots] 977 00:51:17,639 --> 00:51:18,771 [sighs] 978 00:51:19,598 --> 00:51:20,816 Let's get one with nature. 979 00:51:23,819 --> 00:51:25,952 [birds chirping] 980 00:51:26,300 --> 00:51:27,954 We could have just turned them off. 981 00:51:38,182 --> 00:51:40,009 [phone rings] 982 00:51:40,967 --> 00:51:44,275 Okay, well, if you two are so lovey-dovey, let me see you kiss. 983 00:51:44,623 --> 00:51:45,624 Un beso. 984 00:51:48,888 --> 00:51:49,976 -Come on. -[chuckles nervously] 985 00:51:50,150 --> 00:51:53,675 [nervous laughter] 986 00:51:53,849 --> 00:51:55,677 [laughter continues] 987 00:51:57,201 --> 00:51:58,724 A-ha! 988 00:52:00,117 --> 00:52:01,988 [laughter] 989 00:52:03,120 --> 00:52:05,165 [smooching loudly] 990 00:52:06,514 --> 00:52:09,909 Sister, I've heard the most amazing things about you, 991 00:52:10,083 --> 00:52:12,041 yet words aren't even a starting point. 992 00:52:12,651 --> 00:52:15,132 -Your mustache is faker than your tongue! -[gasps] 993 00:52:15,306 --> 00:52:17,743 -[whimpers] Ew! -Y esto qué es?[gasps] 994 00:52:18,874 --> 00:52:20,093 Papiwould never forgive you. 995 00:52:20,267 --> 00:52:21,964 Not only did you fake love, you-- 996 00:52:22,139 --> 00:52:24,184 you faked a whole Mexican! 997 00:52:25,620 --> 00:52:27,187 [dramatic musical sting] 998 00:52:28,188 --> 00:52:31,017 [chuckles] I don't believe it. 999 00:52:31,539 --> 00:52:34,499 -You've got to be the biggest fraud in Latin culture. -[whimpers] 1000 00:52:35,064 --> 00:52:36,283 After Ariana Grande. 1001 00:52:37,719 --> 00:52:38,590 Hey! 1002 00:52:40,069 --> 00:52:41,593 That kiss wasn't fake. 1003 00:52:43,464 --> 00:52:44,552 -It wasn't? -It wasn't? 1004 00:52:45,074 --> 00:52:47,076 [upbeat pop music] 1005 00:52:47,425 --> 00:52:48,382 Did it feel fake to you? 1006 00:52:49,905 --> 00:52:53,170 N-- no, it felt really good. 1007 00:52:58,305 --> 00:52:59,393 [both giggle] 1008 00:53:06,139 --> 00:53:07,009 Qué? 1009 00:53:12,624 --> 00:53:14,103 You guys ever fired a gun? 1010 00:53:14,887 --> 00:53:16,193 -Call of Duty! -Call of Duty! 1011 00:53:16,367 --> 00:53:17,194 [loud gunshot] 1012 00:53:17,368 --> 00:53:18,238 [bird squawks] 1013 00:53:20,719 --> 00:53:22,808 I need someone with the instincts of a hunter 1014 00:53:22,982 --> 00:53:24,549 overseeing my account. 1015 00:53:25,114 --> 00:53:27,378 Kill or be killed. 1016 00:53:29,249 --> 00:53:30,119 It's real simple. 1017 00:53:31,512 --> 00:53:33,427 First person to kill something breathing 1018 00:53:33,601 --> 00:53:36,430 and get it back to the cabin, wins my account, but... 1019 00:53:37,257 --> 00:53:39,433 if I return first with the trophy, 1020 00:53:40,217 --> 00:53:42,349 I find a new company for my millions. 1021 00:53:42,523 --> 00:53:44,612 Yeah, I'm not really the "killy" type. 1022 00:53:44,917 --> 00:53:46,832 I was actually vegan, for a minute. 1023 00:53:49,008 --> 00:53:51,358 -[gun cocks] -Well, I'm not a little bitch, Jim. 1024 00:53:51,880 --> 00:53:54,318 -I'm game. -Wait, I thought Mandy was here to referee? 1025 00:53:54,709 --> 00:53:57,234 Oh, no. I asked Ami to send her. 1026 00:53:57,712 --> 00:54:01,150 -Me and Mandy go way back. She's great! -Fuck. 1027 00:54:01,977 --> 00:54:04,066 And once these loudmouths get the hell out of here 1028 00:54:04,241 --> 00:54:06,808 and stop scaring the wildlife with their whining, 1029 00:54:07,418 --> 00:54:09,985 I'm sure that a creature with a death wish will mosey on up! 1030 00:54:10,595 --> 00:54:12,161 That's the spirit, Mandy! 1031 00:54:13,162 --> 00:54:15,252 Hunting is 90% mental, 1032 00:54:15,817 --> 00:54:19,952 and we know Asians, when it comes to academics. 1033 00:54:20,648 --> 00:54:22,259 [birds chirping] 1034 00:54:22,911 --> 00:54:25,218 -Well, I never said I wouldn't. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1035 00:54:25,392 --> 00:54:26,872 I-- I'll totally bust a cap. 1036 00:54:27,438 --> 00:54:28,700 Let's get started! 1037 00:54:37,839 --> 00:54:38,666 What are you doing? 1038 00:54:39,754 --> 00:54:40,755 We're going with you... 1039 00:54:41,756 --> 00:54:42,583 to murder. 1040 00:54:44,063 --> 00:54:45,717 This isn't a circle jerk, buddy. 1041 00:54:46,326 --> 00:54:47,762 It's every man for himself. 1042 00:54:48,546 --> 00:54:51,157 But, we don't have GPS. 1043 00:54:53,072 --> 00:54:55,857 No phones, no cars, no tech. 1044 00:54:56,293 --> 00:54:58,686 It's just you, mother nature, 1045 00:54:59,121 --> 00:55:00,906 and whatever's on the kill-end of that rifle. 1046 00:55:01,994 --> 00:55:04,866 [sighs] You can follow the high peak back to the cabin. 1047 00:55:07,434 --> 00:55:09,218 What the fuck does that mean? 1048 00:55:10,611 --> 00:55:12,352 He just abandoned us and-- 1049 00:55:13,962 --> 00:55:17,226 ["The Best Day" by Bobby Cole] 1050 00:55:20,795 --> 00:55:21,883 Fuck my life. 1051 00:55:35,984 --> 00:55:41,512 ♪ Today is the best day ♪ 1052 00:55:41,686 --> 00:55:44,428 ♪ Of my life ♪ 1053 00:55:44,863 --> 00:55:48,127 ♪ And I'll sing it out a thousand times ♪ 1054 00:55:48,301 --> 00:55:53,437 ♪ Today is the best day ♪ 1055 00:55:53,872 --> 00:55:56,353 ♪ Of my life ♪ 1056 00:55:57,266 --> 00:55:58,485 [bubbling] 1057 00:55:58,659 --> 00:56:01,967 [western style music] 1058 00:56:02,881 --> 00:56:04,622 [whimpers] 1059 00:56:17,461 --> 00:56:19,027 -[Harry grunts] -[screams] 1060 00:56:19,201 --> 00:56:20,551 [grunting] 1061 00:56:20,725 --> 00:56:21,987 What the hell happened to you? 1062 00:56:22,640 --> 00:56:24,293 Civil rights. 1063 00:56:24,903 --> 00:56:25,991 You? 1064 00:56:26,861 --> 00:56:27,993 I think I fired Laurie. 1065 00:56:29,516 --> 00:56:33,607 -Oh, my God! [giggles] -So excited! I can't believe it! 1066 00:56:33,781 --> 00:56:35,914 -I'm so happy for you. -Thank you! 1067 00:56:36,305 --> 00:56:37,481 You sure about that? 1068 00:56:38,482 --> 00:56:40,919 Damn it. Okay, all right. 1069 00:56:41,093 --> 00:56:42,834 Think, Harry, think. 1070 00:56:46,446 --> 00:56:50,189 [singing] ♪ W-W-H-D ♪ 1071 00:56:51,625 --> 00:56:54,019 ♪ What would Harry do? ♪ 1072 00:56:54,933 --> 00:56:59,111 ♪ To keep it, Harry, true ♪ 1073 00:56:59,416 --> 00:57:00,242 [clears throat] 1074 00:57:01,156 --> 00:57:02,375 ♪ True... ♪ 1075 00:57:02,810 --> 00:57:03,637 [coughs] 1076 00:57:05,117 --> 00:57:07,598 -♪ Ooh-ahh-- ♪ -Oh, you're flat! 1077 00:57:08,642 --> 00:57:10,905 -It centers me, okay? -[groans] 1078 00:57:11,079 --> 00:57:13,212 What type of lawsuits did Laurie Loophole file? 1079 00:57:13,386 --> 00:57:15,997 Um, unlawful termination, 1080 00:57:16,171 --> 00:57:20,219 gender discrimination, reverse gender discrimination. 1081 00:57:20,393 --> 00:57:24,832 -What is that? -When they rehired her after the gender discrimination suit, 1082 00:57:25,442 --> 00:57:28,923 she filed another suit that said they wouldn't rehire a man. 1083 00:57:29,097 --> 00:57:30,969 She sued, because they rehired her? 1084 00:57:31,883 --> 00:57:35,843 She once sued that the splash of the toilet gave her herpes! 1085 00:57:36,017 --> 00:57:38,759 That's it! I'm just gonna go to Ami, 1086 00:57:38,933 --> 00:57:40,718 I'm-- I'm going to tell her, you know... 1087 00:57:42,589 --> 00:57:44,461 Something! Give me something, Brendan! 1088 00:57:44,635 --> 00:57:45,940 I don't know what to tell her! 1089 00:57:46,593 --> 00:57:48,813 That sounds like a you problem. 1090 00:57:48,987 --> 00:57:50,641 [laughs and splutters] 1091 00:57:50,815 --> 00:57:51,946 Ow, my face. 1092 00:57:54,645 --> 00:57:56,298 -What's up, man? -Hey. 1093 00:57:57,604 --> 00:58:00,520 -Dude, pecs are a little-- pecs are a little small, man. -Yeah? 1094 00:58:00,694 --> 00:58:03,958 Um, masturbate twice a day, boost the testosterone levels. 1095 00:58:04,132 --> 00:58:05,743 -All right? Catch you on the track, boy. -All right, cool. 1096 00:58:05,917 --> 00:58:08,093 -[Brent] Hey, hi! -Thank you, Brent! 1097 00:58:08,267 --> 00:58:11,444 [whimsical music] 1098 00:58:13,446 --> 00:58:16,362 [fridge rumbles] 1099 00:58:24,413 --> 00:58:25,371 Ugh! 1100 00:58:31,725 --> 00:58:33,335 [groaning] 1101 00:58:35,033 --> 00:58:37,470 -José? -Lainee? 1102 00:58:38,340 --> 00:58:40,255 Because if you are, you've got the wrong guy. 1103 00:58:40,429 --> 00:58:43,302 -I'm not José. -You called off today! 1104 00:58:43,476 --> 00:58:45,957 -I don't call off! -[Ant] You're not calling anybody! 1105 00:58:46,348 --> 00:58:47,567 [dull thud] 1106 00:58:48,481 --> 00:58:52,267 [ethereal music] 1107 00:58:59,927 --> 00:59:01,320 It's all right, little mama. 1108 00:59:01,625 --> 00:59:03,452 Even bosses have bad days. 1109 00:59:04,192 --> 00:59:04,976 [chuckles] 1110 00:59:09,589 --> 00:59:13,419 [uptempo techno music] 1111 00:59:15,726 --> 00:59:18,337 Damn! Chill! Wit' yo' overly aggressive-ass! 1112 00:59:18,511 --> 00:59:20,774 He's literally knocked the fuck out, Larry. 1113 00:59:21,209 --> 00:59:24,561 -Relax, NYPD. -Hey, hey. He was robbing the place. 1114 00:59:24,735 --> 00:59:26,432 Whatever happened to innocent until proven guilty? 1115 00:59:26,606 --> 00:59:29,087 This is one bad hombre. 1116 00:59:29,261 --> 00:59:31,219 Well, ain't this a whale's dick? 1117 00:59:31,872 --> 00:59:34,658 [spiritual folk music] 1118 00:59:38,575 --> 00:59:40,402 Oh-- oh, shit. 1119 00:59:40,707 --> 00:59:43,710 Oh, shit. Oh, oh! 1120 00:59:43,884 --> 00:59:46,713 Dick chafe! Dick chafe! Aah! 1121 00:59:50,151 --> 00:59:51,239 [Miles] Oh, I can't do this. 1122 00:59:52,284 --> 00:59:54,329 I mean, damn! Do I look African? 1123 00:59:54,678 --> 00:59:56,636 Did I put "tribesman" on my resume? 1124 00:59:56,810 --> 00:59:58,464 [sighs loudly] 1125 00:59:59,421 --> 01:00:00,379 [panting] 1126 01:00:02,555 --> 01:00:04,165 I'm not Man vs. Wild. 1127 01:00:04,775 --> 01:00:07,952 Oh, fuck... [panting] 1128 01:00:09,214 --> 01:00:11,825 My balls didn't drop until I was four! 1129 01:00:11,999 --> 01:00:13,827 [echoes] 1130 01:00:17,048 --> 01:00:20,747 [tense dramatic music] 1131 01:00:25,360 --> 01:00:27,798 [birds chirping] 1132 01:00:29,016 --> 01:00:30,801 -You... -You... 1133 01:00:30,975 --> 01:00:33,064 This is all your fault! 1134 01:00:34,587 --> 01:00:36,502 How convenient, man. 1135 01:00:36,676 --> 01:00:38,417 Even in the middle of nowhere, 1136 01:00:38,591 --> 01:00:40,375 you find a Black man to blame for your bullshit. 1137 01:00:40,549 --> 01:00:43,465 This isn't about Black or White. This whole stupid challenge 1138 01:00:43,640 --> 01:00:45,729 is because you and your buddy have been fucking with my chances. 1139 01:00:45,903 --> 01:00:47,208 What you say there, White privilege? 1140 01:00:47,382 --> 01:00:49,384 I was too busy shucking 1141 01:00:49,733 --> 01:00:51,865 and jiving, and getting fucked over, 1142 01:00:52,039 --> 01:00:54,302 by you and Susie side-chick, all fucking day. 1143 01:00:54,476 --> 01:00:56,435 I didn't do that because you're Black! 1144 01:00:57,001 --> 01:00:59,568 -But you did them. -You and la Raza did the same! 1145 01:01:00,178 --> 01:01:02,441 Always blame the White man when shit doesn't go your way? 1146 01:01:02,615 --> 01:01:04,486 Take responsibility for your failure. 1147 01:01:04,661 --> 01:01:07,185 Easy for you to say when you guys are always holding us back. 1148 01:01:07,359 --> 01:01:08,621 Name one time. 1149 01:01:11,972 --> 01:01:14,758 That's different, man. I didn't do that because you're Black, I-- 1150 01:01:15,802 --> 01:01:17,195 Man, I need this job! 1151 01:01:19,327 --> 01:01:21,373 I need this job to save my dad's house. 1152 01:01:22,722 --> 01:01:24,115 It's all I have left of him. 1153 01:01:26,204 --> 01:01:27,945 I would have fucked over anybody. 1154 01:01:28,772 --> 01:01:30,774 [chuckles] Lowkey, me too, man. 1155 01:01:30,948 --> 01:01:33,167 I mean, I would have voted Trump over Obama, 1156 01:01:33,341 --> 01:01:34,778 to help keep the center open. 1157 01:01:36,040 --> 01:01:37,389 I just wanted the kids in my hood, man, 1158 01:01:37,563 --> 01:01:39,130 to have an easier path than what I had. 1159 01:01:41,088 --> 01:01:43,003 I don't have anything against y'all White boys. 1160 01:01:43,177 --> 01:01:45,266 You signed the Emancipation Proclamation. 1161 01:01:45,440 --> 01:01:47,529 I still wouldn't have voted Trump over Obama. 1162 01:01:47,704 --> 01:01:49,967 [laughs] 1163 01:01:50,141 --> 01:01:51,359 Not that piece of shit. 1164 01:01:52,273 --> 01:01:55,450 Hey, it looks like Handy Mandy got a leg up now. 1165 01:01:55,624 --> 01:01:56,800 [both laugh] 1166 01:01:57,714 --> 01:01:59,367 -[dramatic musical sting] -[laughter] 1167 01:01:59,933 --> 01:02:02,675 Yeah, yeah. She'll be able to roll right in. 1168 01:02:02,849 --> 01:02:04,416 [both laugh] 1169 01:02:04,590 --> 01:02:06,897 -You got that right! -[gun cocks] 1170 01:02:07,375 --> 01:02:08,507 Mandy? 1171 01:02:08,681 --> 01:02:10,248 Why do your feet work? 1172 01:02:10,422 --> 01:02:12,293 Shut the fuck up, both of you. 1173 01:02:12,903 --> 01:02:14,469 Drop them, now. 1174 01:02:14,861 --> 01:02:16,863 [music intensifies] 1175 01:02:20,127 --> 01:02:21,738 Hey, Ami. You got a second? 1176 01:02:21,912 --> 01:02:23,435 For you? No. 1177 01:02:23,609 --> 01:02:25,654 Uh, okay. 1178 01:02:28,005 --> 01:02:30,442 [emotional uplifting music] 1179 01:02:33,184 --> 01:02:34,533 I'm a man. 1180 01:02:35,534 --> 01:02:38,711 You know what, Ami? Unless you want to lose a quarter million dollars, 1181 01:02:38,885 --> 01:02:40,539 I suggest you make a second. 1182 01:02:40,713 --> 01:02:42,976 No, fuck that! Make two seconds, 1183 01:02:43,150 --> 01:02:45,109 because in case you haven't been paying attention, 1184 01:02:45,283 --> 01:02:47,633 that's exactly what trying to "fire" 1185 01:02:47,807 --> 01:02:49,809 Laurie Loophole has cost you. 1186 01:02:51,942 --> 01:02:56,076 I did some research. She has cost you 260k in lawsuits, 1187 01:02:56,250 --> 01:02:58,078 and now she's saying she's pregnant, 1188 01:02:58,252 --> 01:02:59,993 which could easily double that amount, 1189 01:03:00,167 --> 01:03:02,126 if we don't have a solid game plan. 1190 01:03:02,953 --> 01:03:05,738 So, why exactly are we firing her? 1191 01:03:05,912 --> 01:03:09,133 -Performance? Attendance? -I don't like her. 1192 01:03:10,047 --> 01:03:13,050 Okay. What exactly has she done that you don't like? 1193 01:03:13,224 --> 01:03:14,616 Her perfume. 1194 01:03:15,313 --> 01:03:17,358 It's whore-ish. 1195 01:03:19,317 --> 01:03:21,362 Okay, not the most legal reason. 1196 01:03:21,536 --> 01:03:23,495 My company, my reason. 1197 01:03:24,061 --> 01:03:26,106 Damn it, Ami! If you're gonna fire me anyway, 1198 01:03:26,280 --> 01:03:27,934 then fuck it, fire her yourself. 1199 01:03:28,108 --> 01:03:30,589 And when you get hit with a multimillion dollar lawsuit-- 1200 01:03:30,763 --> 01:03:32,112 [slaps] 1201 01:03:32,286 --> 01:03:34,985 Move her to the back office. 1202 01:03:36,029 --> 01:03:39,903 I even catch a whiff of that bitch's scent, 1203 01:03:40,077 --> 01:03:42,383 and you're both fired. Got it? 1204 01:03:45,647 --> 01:03:48,520 You ever tell me "no" again, 1205 01:03:48,999 --> 01:03:51,828 it had better be over a billion dollars. 1206 01:03:54,004 --> 01:03:54,874 [slaps] 1207 01:03:58,312 --> 01:04:00,532 And cover your face. I don't want our clients 1208 01:04:00,706 --> 01:04:02,186 thinking we're having an outbreak. 1209 01:04:03,883 --> 01:04:06,364 Actually, Ami, this is who I am. 1210 01:04:06,538 --> 01:04:08,279 I'm a man, and-- 1211 01:04:11,412 --> 01:04:13,719 And I have a great beige remoulade 1212 01:04:13,893 --> 01:04:16,113 I have been waiting to try. 1213 01:04:19,159 --> 01:04:20,813 You know, I thought for sure that this position 1214 01:04:20,987 --> 01:04:22,597 was going to be mine, after I got rid of Will. 1215 01:04:23,555 --> 01:04:24,556 What? 1216 01:04:26,253 --> 01:04:29,735 -You killed Will? -With that "Look at me, I'm Mr. Nice Guy" 1217 01:04:29,909 --> 01:04:32,129 dipshit out of my way, my tracks covered, 1218 01:04:32,520 --> 01:04:34,174 I just thought that this job was gonna be mine. 1219 01:04:34,348 --> 01:04:35,872 -Mandy, this is crazy shit-- -No! 1220 01:04:36,481 --> 01:04:38,135 What's crazy is the fact that you think it's easy 1221 01:04:38,309 --> 01:04:40,833 rolling yourself around in a wheelchair for three years, 1222 01:04:41,007 --> 01:04:43,357 gaining sympathy, increasing likability, 1223 01:04:43,531 --> 01:04:45,838 all the while trying to plot how to off 1224 01:04:46,012 --> 01:04:47,535 the next person up on the food chain. 1225 01:04:47,709 --> 01:04:50,190 Oh, and by the way, it was a perfect plot. 1226 01:04:50,887 --> 01:04:51,931 You know... 1227 01:04:52,627 --> 01:04:54,194 Will probably deserved it, with-- 1228 01:04:54,499 --> 01:04:56,980 with all that "Ooh, look at me, I'm so helpful" crap. 1229 01:04:57,589 --> 01:04:58,677 Yuck! Right? 1230 01:04:59,330 --> 01:05:01,810 And I won't even hate on that primo handicapped 1231 01:05:01,985 --> 01:05:04,813 parking spot you've been milking, I mean, that's innovation! 1232 01:05:04,988 --> 01:05:07,338 -[applauds] -The promotion is yours. 1233 01:05:07,512 --> 01:05:10,689 -Take it. -Oh, yeah. I'm gonna take it. 1234 01:05:11,081 --> 01:05:15,433 You see, you guys, you helped me realize that between the entitled White man 1235 01:05:15,607 --> 01:05:18,653 and the equal opportunity Black man, that the Asian woman 1236 01:05:18,827 --> 01:05:22,353 is just going to have to take an "any means necessary" approach. 1237 01:05:23,702 --> 01:05:26,661 Oh, and Jim said to bring back something dead, right? 1238 01:05:27,271 --> 01:05:30,535 Well, I'm banking on your dead asses getting me a bigger salary. 1239 01:05:30,970 --> 01:05:32,319 -[gun cocks] -Say hi to Will. 1240 01:05:34,408 --> 01:05:36,062 [Miles] Oh, oh! Shit! 1241 01:05:39,805 --> 01:05:41,894 -This way! -[Miles] Is this the way back to the cabin? 1242 01:05:42,068 --> 01:05:44,331 -[Dylan] Is it? Oh, shit. -[gun cocks] 1243 01:05:45,028 --> 01:05:47,856 Oh, shit. Damn! She's gaining on us! 1244 01:05:48,292 --> 01:05:50,598 -[loud gunshot] -Three years of latent leg energy! 1245 01:05:50,772 --> 01:05:53,645 -[Mandy] Ha! Will thought he could get away, too. -[loud gunshot] 1246 01:05:53,819 --> 01:05:57,214 [uptempo rock music] 1247 01:05:58,041 --> 01:05:59,520 -[loud gunshot] -[Dylan] Shit! 1248 01:06:04,438 --> 01:06:06,963 [microwave rumbles and dings] 1249 01:06:07,441 --> 01:06:10,140 Man, coming back to work after lunch is like having sex with your ex, 1250 01:06:10,314 --> 01:06:12,316 -that you know has an incurable STD, bro! -[laughs] 1251 01:06:12,490 --> 01:06:14,361 Every fiber in you knows that you shouldn't, 1252 01:06:14,535 --> 01:06:16,668 -but here we are again, drenched in sex sweat... -[grunts loudly] 1253 01:06:16,842 --> 01:06:18,626 ...on our way back to the free clinic. 1254 01:06:18,800 --> 01:06:20,802 -[grunts loudly] -[chuckles] What the fuck... 1255 01:06:20,977 --> 01:06:22,500 -[loud grunting] -Shit... 1256 01:06:22,674 --> 01:06:24,502 Bros, come on! 1257 01:06:24,676 --> 01:06:26,895 It's simple. It's a thrust, 1258 01:06:27,896 --> 01:06:31,291 -calf raise, thrust, calf raise. -Oh, my God! 1259 01:06:31,465 --> 01:06:33,641 -There we go! [grunts] -[phone ringing] 1260 01:06:33,815 --> 01:06:36,514 [loud grunting] 1261 01:06:36,688 --> 01:06:39,386 -Yo, you hearing this guy? [laughter] -What's so funny, guys? 1262 01:06:39,560 --> 01:06:41,432 Come on. Chicks don't like sticks. 1263 01:06:41,606 --> 01:06:43,173 What, y'all see my live stream last night, 1264 01:06:43,347 --> 01:06:45,088 of me sharting on the squat rack? 1265 01:06:45,262 --> 01:06:47,699 -[Juan] Oh, my God! -I deleted it! What? No! 1266 01:06:47,873 --> 01:06:50,876 -Come on! -[all] Happy Birthday! 1267 01:06:51,050 --> 01:06:54,575 -[applauding] -Who wants cupcakes? 1268 01:06:55,446 --> 01:06:57,752 Wait! I never got a cake for my birthday. 1269 01:06:58,362 --> 01:07:00,581 -When was your birthday? -March 15th! 1270 01:07:01,321 --> 01:07:03,845 Maybe we missed March this year. When was it last year? 1271 01:07:05,891 --> 01:07:08,546 -Guys, let's take 87 seconds... -[emotional uplifting music] 1272 01:07:08,720 --> 01:07:10,417 ...to honor our fallen comrade Will, 1273 01:07:10,591 --> 01:07:13,377 and the value he brought to DanRick. 1274 01:07:14,030 --> 01:07:16,336 Can we finish my birthday cupcakes first? 1275 01:07:19,252 --> 01:07:21,646 -Will... -[crying] 1276 01:07:21,820 --> 01:07:23,996 Yes, yes, we all should feel comfortable 1277 01:07:24,170 --> 01:07:25,606 shedding a tear or two for Will. 1278 01:07:26,172 --> 01:07:27,782 -He was a great man. -[crying continues] 1279 01:07:27,956 --> 01:07:29,610 A decent coa-- 1280 01:07:34,746 --> 01:07:37,270 -[upbeat hip hop music] -Woo! 1281 01:07:37,444 --> 01:07:39,011 -[laughter] -Woo! 1282 01:07:43,189 --> 01:07:45,061 [panting] 1283 01:07:50,762 --> 01:07:51,632 Oh! 1284 01:07:53,678 --> 01:07:55,332 [Miles] Small bitch can run, man. 1285 01:07:58,030 --> 01:08:00,119 I'm not trying to be racist or anything, man, but... 1286 01:08:01,773 --> 01:08:03,731 couldn't you grab a gun? Aren't there a ton 1287 01:08:03,905 --> 01:08:06,125 -of shootings in South Central? -Oh, please. 1288 01:08:06,299 --> 01:08:08,780 You guys the ones always shooting up the schools. 1289 01:08:08,954 --> 01:08:11,217 -I kicked leaves, what did you do? -I pissed myself. 1290 01:08:11,391 --> 01:08:13,001 I was so scared. 1291 01:08:16,788 --> 01:08:19,269 [spiritual folk music] 1292 01:08:28,191 --> 01:08:30,323 [Miles] Man, you were crying like a fucking baby. 1293 01:08:30,801 --> 01:08:33,109 [Dylan] Of course I was, she had a gun in my face! 1294 01:08:33,282 --> 01:08:35,675 -You didn't fear for your life? -[man] Fear! 1295 01:08:36,634 --> 01:08:39,071 -Oh, shit! -False Evidence Appearing Real. 1296 01:08:39,245 --> 01:08:41,203 -Who are you? -He's with Mandy, bro. Come on! 1297 01:08:42,030 --> 01:08:44,772 -I don't belong to a Mandy. -You ain't hear those gunshots? 1298 01:08:44,946 --> 01:08:46,383 I heard your friend say he was scared. 1299 01:08:46,905 --> 01:08:50,126 I am here to clear my mind of the fear, 1300 01:08:50,517 --> 01:08:53,041 or False Evidence Appearing Real. 1301 01:08:53,345 --> 01:08:55,696 False? Those were real bullets! 1302 01:08:56,306 --> 01:09:01,485 Some people die from bullets, but most... die from living. 1303 01:09:01,658 --> 01:09:03,661 Come on, man. We don't have time to listen to his Socrates 1304 01:09:03,835 --> 01:09:05,532 and his forest philosophies. Come on-- 1305 01:09:05,706 --> 01:09:07,708 Hey, man, let-- let's see what he has to say. 1306 01:09:08,405 --> 01:09:09,884 You know, he might have some water. 1307 01:09:10,885 --> 01:09:12,059 You got any water? 1308 01:09:17,587 --> 01:09:18,545 Drink. 1309 01:09:22,767 --> 01:09:25,509 Man, this that shit where, White people always curious. 1310 01:09:25,683 --> 01:09:27,467 [panting] 1311 01:09:29,077 --> 01:09:31,950 [owl hooting] 1312 01:09:32,124 --> 01:09:34,866 So, I have this new app that's supposed to launch tonight, 1313 01:09:35,606 --> 01:09:38,957 but we have this... glitch. 1314 01:09:39,523 --> 01:09:44,005 and I think it's because, we are all more afraid of making a mistake. 1315 01:09:45,093 --> 01:09:48,444 We focus so much on the success, that we don't allow ourselves 1316 01:09:48,619 --> 01:09:50,055 to fail gracefully. 1317 01:09:50,751 --> 01:09:53,841 Fear... False Evidence Appearing Real. 1318 01:09:54,014 --> 01:09:56,235 Exactly. 1319 01:09:56,409 --> 01:09:58,281 -What's the app? -It's called... 1320 01:09:59,151 --> 01:10:00,718 -"Clone." -[musical fanfare] 1321 01:10:00,892 --> 01:10:02,675 You can post tasks that you need to be done. 1322 01:10:02,850 --> 01:10:04,809 Qualified people bid on the task. 1323 01:10:04,983 --> 01:10:07,333 And you pick the person, at their cost. 1324 01:10:08,073 --> 01:10:11,076 Grocery shopping list, pick up kids from school, 1325 01:10:11,250 --> 01:10:13,861 work spreadsheets, sperm donations. 1326 01:10:14,818 --> 01:10:17,082 -Anything? -Anything. 1327 01:10:17,691 --> 01:10:19,389 Come to your house and cook dinner naked, 1328 01:10:19,563 --> 01:10:21,782 then clean up after? [blows excitedly] 1329 01:10:21,956 --> 01:10:23,175 Domestic categories. 1330 01:10:23,871 --> 01:10:26,874 -Find me a girlfriend? -Uh, long term? 1331 01:10:27,048 --> 01:10:28,615 Or for a brief encounter? 1332 01:10:29,355 --> 01:10:31,314 -Ooh! -[laughter] 1333 01:10:34,273 --> 01:10:38,538 -Hey, man. I'm feeling pretty good. -[sparkling chimes] 1334 01:10:38,712 --> 01:10:41,585 [chuckles] Dude, like, such a good vibe! 1335 01:10:41,759 --> 01:10:43,630 -[applauds] -Yeah. Yeah. 1336 01:10:43,804 --> 01:10:46,023 Awesome, right? [chuckles] 1337 01:10:46,198 --> 01:10:48,722 Wait, are you guys talking about my app, or about the peyote water? 1338 01:10:48,896 --> 01:10:51,029 Because, you never know what you're gonna get with that. 1339 01:10:51,464 --> 01:10:52,596 What the fuck? 1340 01:10:52,770 --> 01:10:54,380 [echoes] What the fuck? 1341 01:10:56,034 --> 01:10:59,166 -Relax, guys. -I've never done drugs in my life, man. 1342 01:10:59,342 --> 01:11:01,605 Oh, man! Oh, man! It feels like my soul 1343 01:11:01,779 --> 01:11:03,476 is gonna crack out of my chest plate! 1344 01:11:03,650 --> 01:11:07,045 Oh, wow, man! You guys need a distraction. 1345 01:11:07,219 --> 01:11:09,395 Loo-- look, zero in, man. 1346 01:11:10,440 --> 01:11:12,137 Say, do you guys know tech? 1347 01:11:13,878 --> 01:11:16,968 Okay, so my cloud server is having issues, 1348 01:11:17,142 --> 01:11:19,318 because of the memory that's allotted to it. 1349 01:11:19,492 --> 01:11:22,452 [upbeat Spanish pop music] 1350 01:11:56,616 --> 01:11:59,576 But if your core network is slowed with the inter-latent packet loss... 1351 01:11:59,924 --> 01:12:02,621 Then you have to reset the security model functions. 1352 01:12:02,796 --> 01:12:04,362 -Your problem isn't-- -Your problem isn't a-- 1353 01:12:04,537 --> 01:12:06,278 -You go ahead. -Floor is yours. 1354 01:12:06,452 --> 01:12:09,541 It looks like it may be bogged down by a central server... 1355 01:12:09,716 --> 01:12:12,284 Where, with peer-to-peer compression, your data transfer 1356 01:12:12,458 --> 01:12:13,851 will be much more efficient. 1357 01:12:14,025 --> 01:12:15,766 It won't be cheap, but not only will it 1358 01:12:15,940 --> 01:12:18,290 fix the issue with the S.A.T. framework... 1359 01:12:18,464 --> 01:12:21,337 Your sustainability will improve an additional... 1360 01:12:21,946 --> 01:12:24,514 -five years. -Start a crowdfunding. 1361 01:12:24,688 --> 01:12:26,864 -35k will do. -Wow! 1362 01:12:27,038 --> 01:12:29,127 You guys are either tripping balls or geniuses. 1363 01:12:29,300 --> 01:12:30,693 [chuckles] 1364 01:12:31,085 --> 01:12:31,999 [bird squawks] 1365 01:12:32,173 --> 01:12:33,130 -Crap! -What? 1366 01:12:33,305 --> 01:12:34,567 -High peak! -Gotta go! 1367 01:12:35,655 --> 01:12:36,439 Wait, guys! 1368 01:12:37,222 --> 01:12:38,789 [uptempo rock music] 1369 01:12:39,572 --> 01:12:41,357 [pants] Oh shit. 1370 01:12:44,534 --> 01:12:46,666 -This way? -Yeah, that way. 1371 01:12:49,277 --> 01:12:51,454 Miles, I'm White. You got to slow it down! 1372 01:12:51,628 --> 01:12:52,672 Come on, man. Let's go! 1373 01:12:53,325 --> 01:12:55,109 [panting] 1374 01:12:55,282 --> 01:12:56,937 We're almost there, man. Come on! 1375 01:12:57,938 --> 01:12:59,940 [panting] 1376 01:13:00,114 --> 01:13:01,202 [Dylan] Oh, shit! 1377 01:13:05,163 --> 01:13:06,120 That bitch! 1378 01:13:06,294 --> 01:13:07,731 Agh! She blocked us in! 1379 01:13:08,427 --> 01:13:09,689 He shot our phones. 1380 01:13:09,862 --> 01:13:11,474 -What are we gonna do? -We're stuck. 1381 01:13:16,217 --> 01:13:17,218 [loud gunshot] 1382 01:13:17,784 --> 01:13:18,611 Ah, shit! 1383 01:13:20,178 --> 01:13:21,745 -[gun cocks] -Yes, Mandy. That's the spirit! 1384 01:13:21,919 --> 01:13:23,224 [loud gunshot] 1385 01:13:23,398 --> 01:13:25,096 Well, you're just full of will power. 1386 01:13:25,705 --> 01:13:27,184 -[chuckles] -[gun cocks] 1387 01:13:38,630 --> 01:13:40,327 [keys jangle] 1388 01:13:42,940 --> 01:13:44,420 [whimsical music] 1389 01:13:44,594 --> 01:13:46,117 [Dylan blows raspberry] 1390 01:13:46,291 --> 01:13:48,641 -What are you doing? -I saw it on a movie once. 1391 01:13:48,815 --> 01:13:50,295 It's an old school Uber. 1392 01:13:50,469 --> 01:13:52,384 You put your thumb up and a car picks you up. 1393 01:13:52,950 --> 01:13:55,474 -How does it work? -I imagine, the body puts out 1394 01:13:55,648 --> 01:13:57,998 some sort of cosmic beacon. 1395 01:14:00,958 --> 01:14:03,482 You're the secret to jacking off. 1396 01:14:03,656 --> 01:14:05,832 [engine rumbles] 1397 01:14:13,100 --> 01:14:15,146 -Kinetic energy! -[chuckles] 1398 01:14:21,978 --> 01:14:23,763 We don't have to pay him in blowjobs, do we? 1399 01:14:32,293 --> 01:14:33,991 [engine rumbles] 1400 01:14:35,383 --> 01:14:36,776 -We need to talk! -We need to talk! 1401 01:14:36,950 --> 01:14:39,257 Well, I'll let you guys get to it. 1402 01:14:39,431 --> 01:14:40,476 I hope I helped. 1403 01:14:42,041 --> 01:14:44,392 Hey, guys. Can I talk to you for a sec? 1404 01:14:49,920 --> 01:14:52,443 [engine rumbles] 1405 01:14:58,581 --> 01:15:00,103 [intense dubstep music] 1406 01:15:36,139 --> 01:15:37,620 [dramatic musical sting] 1407 01:15:38,490 --> 01:15:40,884 Are you fricking kidding me? 1408 01:15:41,537 --> 01:15:44,061 Rape, embezzlement, attempted murder! 1409 01:15:44,235 --> 01:15:46,193 -What? -What? What are you talking about? 1410 01:15:46,367 --> 01:15:49,282 We didn't try to rape Mandy! Ew! 1411 01:15:49,457 --> 01:15:52,068 No, you just tried to kill her! 1412 01:15:52,243 --> 01:15:54,593 -She tried to kill us! -Oh, sure. 1413 01:15:54,767 --> 01:15:56,508 She tried to run you over in her wheelchair. 1414 01:15:56,682 --> 01:15:58,858 Roadkill, right? Cool story, bro. 1415 01:15:59,032 --> 01:16:01,469 She was shooting at us! 1416 01:16:01,644 --> 01:16:03,384 And her legs aren't useless, bro. 1417 01:16:03,559 --> 01:16:05,255 They just pale! Look, just look. 1418 01:16:05,430 --> 01:16:07,475 -Oh, come on. What are you doing? -[man] No, Miles! 1419 01:16:07,650 --> 01:16:09,739 [people screaming] 1420 01:16:09,913 --> 01:16:11,478 [Dylan] No, no, no, no. No, really. 1421 01:16:11,654 --> 01:16:13,481 -What? -See! 1422 01:16:14,700 --> 01:16:16,746 [people screaming] 1423 01:16:16,920 --> 01:16:20,010 No, no, come on! Look, she stands! See! See! 1424 01:16:20,487 --> 01:16:23,666 [tense dramatic music] 1425 01:16:24,580 --> 01:16:26,538 That-- that's mierda! 1426 01:16:26,843 --> 01:16:28,714 -I just said it! -It's okay, Harry. 1427 01:16:29,106 --> 01:16:30,934 They don't call me "Handy Mandy" for nothing. 1428 01:16:35,025 --> 01:16:36,504 Dance... 1429 01:16:36,679 --> 01:16:38,637 -[man] Jesus Christ. -[Tyrone] You seeing this? 1430 01:16:39,464 --> 01:16:41,161 It's a diversion! 1431 01:16:41,727 --> 01:16:44,034 And the money you've been embezzling! 1432 01:16:44,208 --> 01:16:45,905 What you did to Shayne! 1433 01:16:49,561 --> 01:16:51,215 I wasn't even working here then! 1434 01:16:51,650 --> 01:16:53,913 Are you kidding me? Man, I don't date White girls! 1435 01:16:54,087 --> 01:16:55,741 I'm not racist, though, all right? 1436 01:16:56,175 --> 01:16:58,309 We were gonna promote one of you! 1437 01:16:58,875 --> 01:17:02,705 We trusted you guys and you repay us with slander? 1438 01:17:03,053 --> 01:17:06,230 Okay, okay. He didn't rape Shayne. 1439 01:17:06,404 --> 01:17:08,580 She set him up, to get me promoted. 1440 01:17:09,146 --> 01:17:11,670 -Well, that's a reach-around! -And the money wasn't stolen. 1441 01:17:11,844 --> 01:17:14,412 -Lonzo faked it to take him out of the running. -Hmm, no, bro. 1442 01:17:14,585 --> 01:17:16,196 -Leave me out of this one! -Oh... [chuckles] 1443 01:17:16,370 --> 01:17:19,460 What happened to good, old-fashioned hard work? 1444 01:17:19,635 --> 01:17:21,985 Fucking end this already! 1445 01:17:22,159 --> 01:17:24,422 Harry, this isn't even a company report. 1446 01:17:24,596 --> 01:17:28,121 These pictures are obviously photoshopped on Microsoft Paint. 1447 01:17:28,295 --> 01:17:29,732 There's no need to call the cops. 1448 01:17:33,561 --> 01:17:35,868 Uh-- I need to make a call. 1449 01:17:36,041 --> 01:17:39,306 -Hold, but she really tried to kill us, man! -Oh, sure. 1450 01:17:39,480 --> 01:17:41,178 I mean, you guys just admitted you're willing to break 1451 01:17:41,352 --> 01:17:43,397 all morality and principles for a job, 1452 01:17:43,571 --> 01:17:46,357 but now we're supposed to believe that... 1453 01:17:46,923 --> 01:17:50,187 the woman in the wheelchair, in the woods, 1454 01:17:50,361 --> 01:17:52,102 attempted to murder you? 1455 01:17:52,276 --> 01:17:54,800 [chuckles] You guys are more fucked than I am. 1456 01:17:54,974 --> 01:17:56,280 Oh, fuck me. 1457 01:17:56,454 --> 01:17:57,847 Let's make this easy. 1458 01:17:58,674 --> 01:18:00,893 -You're both fired. Leave the key fobs. -But-- but-- 1459 01:18:01,067 --> 01:18:02,808 but what about the kids' size Voltrons? 1460 01:18:02,982 --> 01:18:04,592 What about my dad's house? 1461 01:18:04,767 --> 01:18:07,291 -I said, "Fired!" -But-- but come on! 1462 01:18:07,465 --> 01:18:08,987 [dramatic musical sting] 1463 01:18:10,990 --> 01:18:12,035 [Miles sighs] 1464 01:18:12,209 --> 01:18:14,166 [Dylan sighs] 1465 01:18:16,213 --> 01:18:18,781 -Congrats on staying alive. -[keys jangle] 1466 01:18:18,955 --> 01:18:20,085 Job's yours. 1467 01:18:22,132 --> 01:18:24,264 [indistinct chatter] 1468 01:18:27,398 --> 01:18:28,529 Congrats, Mandy. 1469 01:18:34,273 --> 01:18:37,843 My bad, G. Guess we took it a little too far, huh? 1470 01:18:39,323 --> 01:18:42,065 [chuckles] Right... Well, fuck them crack-ass crackers! 1471 01:18:43,196 --> 01:18:45,111 -Right? -'Zo, do me a favor. 1472 01:18:45,285 --> 01:18:46,722 Yeah, I got you, man. Anything. 1473 01:18:47,505 --> 01:18:48,549 Fuck off! 1474 01:18:51,727 --> 01:18:54,773 [uptempo hip hop music] 1475 01:18:58,298 --> 01:19:01,824 [scoffs] So fucking typical. 1476 01:19:02,650 --> 01:19:05,349 They had to go pull some bullshit Rooney Rule. 1477 01:19:08,656 --> 01:19:10,876 But you had real dick, Dylan. 1478 01:19:12,443 --> 01:19:15,663 You deserve that manipulative red dress. 1479 01:19:15,838 --> 01:19:17,883 [figurine rattles] 1480 01:19:19,493 --> 01:19:22,322 You know, I'd rather paper-slice my dick hole 1481 01:19:22,496 --> 01:19:24,237 and stick it in a tank full of piranhas, 1482 01:19:24,411 --> 01:19:25,934 than fuck with a racist bitch like you. 1483 01:19:32,245 --> 01:19:35,466 He is such a hung dick right now. 1484 01:19:36,815 --> 01:19:37,728 [soft moan] 1485 01:19:38,730 --> 01:19:40,253 [door creaks] 1486 01:19:43,213 --> 01:19:45,781 -Grab a beer? -I was gonna say shots. 1487 01:19:45,955 --> 01:19:48,784 But-- wait, wait, wait. The office closed early today? 1488 01:19:49,959 --> 01:19:52,744 No, they're having a little party. 1489 01:19:53,092 --> 01:19:55,486 What-- a party? Hey, and they best be 1490 01:19:55,660 --> 01:19:57,923 cleaning up after they self, too. 1491 01:19:58,489 --> 01:20:01,231 Why do you both have boxes? Who got the promotion? 1492 01:20:02,058 --> 01:20:06,279 Yeah, now y'all moving on up! [chuckles] 1493 01:20:06,452 --> 01:20:09,934 -No, we're moving on out. -Hmm? 1494 01:20:10,109 --> 01:20:12,023 What? No promotion? 1495 01:20:12,198 --> 01:20:13,025 No job. 1496 01:20:17,029 --> 01:20:18,596 Hey, Lainee. 1497 01:20:19,466 --> 01:20:21,468 Don't be afraid to be a kid for a little while. 1498 01:20:22,034 --> 01:20:24,994 Yeah, a long while. 1499 01:20:25,603 --> 01:20:26,473 Deuces, Ant. 1500 01:20:34,046 --> 01:20:36,092 -Fuck this place. -[elevator dings] 1501 01:20:38,702 --> 01:20:42,011 [soulful melancholic music] 1502 01:20:45,536 --> 01:20:47,712 [indistinct background chatter] 1503 01:20:50,584 --> 01:20:52,717 Oh, sorry, guys. This spot's actually reserved, 1504 01:20:52,891 --> 01:20:55,023 but I have another great spot free over by the bar. 1505 01:21:00,550 --> 01:21:01,682 [blows raspberry] 1506 01:21:04,250 --> 01:21:07,601 -[sighs] -Hey, dudes. 1507 01:21:08,166 --> 01:21:10,909 Usually I'll say a double, but you guys look like you need a triple. 1508 01:21:11,431 --> 01:21:12,432 Got you. 1509 01:21:15,827 --> 01:21:18,395 Profiling over here, because my boy's wearing a White tee. 1510 01:21:18,568 --> 01:21:21,050 -Can't get VIP? -Look, man. 1511 01:21:21,441 --> 01:21:23,008 I'm really sorry for everything. 1512 01:21:23,574 --> 01:21:26,446 I respect you for trying to save your pop's crib. I mean... 1513 01:21:26,620 --> 01:21:29,014 My sister is in real estate, I can hit her up for options? 1514 01:21:29,188 --> 01:21:31,147 I appreciate it, man, but I don't know how much 1515 01:21:31,321 --> 01:21:32,888 that's gonna do for me, with no money. 1516 01:21:34,019 --> 01:21:35,499 I'm sorry for you, too, man. 1517 01:21:35,978 --> 01:21:38,154 If I could help out those kids in any way, I would. 1518 01:21:38,327 --> 01:21:39,807 You didn't try to end my life today, man. 1519 01:21:39,982 --> 01:21:41,940 -It was that fake crippled bitch. -Mm-hmm. 1520 01:21:42,114 --> 01:21:43,855 -See, that's what's wrong with this country. -Mm-hmm. 1521 01:21:44,029 --> 01:21:46,335 -Scandalous people. -Mm-hmm. 1522 01:21:47,772 --> 01:21:48,947 Mm-hmm. 1523 01:21:51,645 --> 01:21:52,777 Ahh! 1524 01:21:53,559 --> 01:21:54,431 [coughs] 1525 01:21:55,084 --> 01:21:56,693 I mean, there's always freelance, 1526 01:21:56,868 --> 01:21:57,956 but I need a consistent paycheck. 1527 01:21:58,130 --> 01:21:59,610 -I hear that. -[chuckles] 1528 01:21:59,784 --> 01:22:01,568 Now, I live with a roommate who steals my shit 1529 01:22:01,742 --> 01:22:03,005 and sells it on eBay. 1530 01:22:04,136 --> 01:22:05,964 -Well, at least you have your own space. -[sighs] 1531 01:22:06,138 --> 01:22:08,139 Man, I still live in my parents' garage... 1532 01:22:09,054 --> 01:22:10,534 where they still park at, man! 1533 01:22:11,665 --> 01:22:12,797 -Another round! -Another round! 1534 01:22:12,971 --> 01:22:14,016 [glasses chink] 1535 01:22:14,930 --> 01:22:18,020 [uptempo techno music] 1536 01:22:20,022 --> 01:22:23,808 Come on. One, two, three! 1537 01:22:28,334 --> 01:22:29,422 Ahh! 1538 01:22:31,424 --> 01:22:33,296 Ahh! 1539 01:22:33,687 --> 01:22:35,862 Woo! Hoo-hoo-hoo! 1540 01:22:36,168 --> 01:22:38,170 -[groans] -Woo! 1541 01:22:38,344 --> 01:22:42,305 -We got a handy from Mandy. -[groans] Man! 1542 01:22:43,393 --> 01:22:45,568 I don't know what sucks more, us getting shafted, 1543 01:22:45,743 --> 01:22:48,746 or us losing to Mandy, man. I'm not a loser! 1544 01:22:49,050 --> 01:22:50,530 And I never lose! 1545 01:22:51,314 --> 01:22:54,839 I only have a found box, because I've never lost anything. 1546 01:22:55,013 --> 01:22:56,493 Oh, watch this. 1547 01:22:57,362 --> 01:22:59,713 I never had sex! 1548 01:22:59,887 --> 01:23:02,237 [laughter and jeering] 1549 01:23:02,412 --> 01:23:04,109 Because I didn't want to lose my virginity. 1550 01:23:04,282 --> 01:23:06,285 [both giggle] 1551 01:23:06,894 --> 01:23:08,244 [laughs] 1552 01:23:12,291 --> 01:23:14,032 We should open our own firm. 1553 01:23:14,641 --> 01:23:16,382 With no money, imagine that. 1554 01:23:16,730 --> 01:23:19,037 I'm trying to imagine how we're gonna pay these bills! 1555 01:23:19,210 --> 01:23:21,344 Uh, I'm playin the black card... [chuckles] 1556 01:23:21,518 --> 01:23:24,434 -Imagination is a state of being. -[sparkling chimes] 1557 01:23:25,391 --> 01:23:28,655 Man! You are everywhere! 1558 01:23:29,091 --> 01:23:31,484 -Wait, wait, wait, wait. Huh? -[chuckles] 1559 01:23:31,657 --> 01:23:35,053 -Are you a Clone app? -[all laugh] 1560 01:23:35,227 --> 01:23:36,576 -Drink, guys. -Huh? 1561 01:23:37,577 --> 01:23:39,405 -Enjoy! -Oh-- Oh. 1562 01:23:39,579 --> 01:23:42,626 -The drink. I know what you like to drink! -[laughter] 1563 01:23:42,800 --> 01:23:45,455 -Peyote. -[chuckles] It's my specialty. 1564 01:23:46,282 --> 01:23:48,893 But today we are celebrating. 1565 01:23:49,067 --> 01:23:51,112 -Huh? Huh? -Come on over, guys. 1566 01:23:51,722 --> 01:23:53,245 -You're a big part of the reason. -Okay. 1567 01:23:53,419 --> 01:23:56,596 [clears throat] Transfer their check to mine, 1568 01:23:56,770 --> 01:23:59,860 -double everything on this table. -Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 1569 01:24:00,035 --> 01:24:02,776 -I want these guys passed out, in an hour? -Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 1570 01:24:02,950 --> 01:24:05,214 -[chuckles] Come on. -Yes, yes. Let's go. 1571 01:24:05,388 --> 01:24:07,781 Let's go. Let's go, free drinks, man! Come on, come on! 1572 01:24:07,955 --> 01:24:10,393 -Get your ass up, let's go drink beer. -[groans] 1573 01:24:10,567 --> 01:24:13,657 -[loud clanging] -Oh, shit! Sorry about that, ladies. 1574 01:24:13,831 --> 01:24:15,746 -Ha-ha! Oh-- oh! -I'm not sorry. 1575 01:24:15,920 --> 01:24:18,705 -Yep. -Hi, I'm Dylan! 1576 01:24:18,879 --> 01:24:22,100 ["Bounce" by Don Lennon] 1577 01:24:25,234 --> 01:24:27,279 ♪ Everybody bounce ♪ 1578 01:24:29,107 --> 01:24:30,326 [laughter] 1579 01:24:30,630 --> 01:24:31,978 [music fades] 1580 01:24:32,154 --> 01:24:34,678 -So, the launch went great? -Well... 1581 01:24:35,679 --> 01:24:37,028 We didn't actually launch. 1582 01:24:37,637 --> 01:24:38,943 After I heard your recommendations, 1583 01:24:39,117 --> 01:24:41,032 I was feeling so good about the demo. 1584 01:24:41,772 --> 01:24:44,253 I made a couple of calls, and sold the app for 30 mil. 1585 01:24:44,427 --> 01:24:45,950 -[coughs] -[chuckles] 1586 01:24:46,516 --> 01:24:48,692 That deserves a salute! 1587 01:24:49,214 --> 01:24:52,957 -At least one of us made it out nice today, man. -[chuckles] 1588 01:24:54,350 --> 01:24:57,092 So, you guys were over there, talking about opening a firm. 1589 01:24:57,831 --> 01:24:59,702 -What type? -Software. 1590 01:24:59,877 --> 01:25:03,402 -Like we do now. -Well, if you are half as good 1591 01:25:03,576 --> 01:25:05,230 as that problem solving in the woods... 1592 01:25:06,492 --> 01:25:07,318 you're hired! 1593 01:25:10,061 --> 01:25:11,976 Specifically, what are you saying? 1594 01:25:12,150 --> 01:25:13,585 Because I'm very intoxicated. 1595 01:25:15,110 --> 01:25:16,415 I owe you guys. 1596 01:25:16,807 --> 01:25:20,898 I... will... invest... 1597 01:25:21,812 --> 01:25:22,987 In us? 1598 01:25:24,119 --> 01:25:27,165 Say in us, please say in us! 1599 01:25:27,773 --> 01:25:29,036 -In you. -[whimpers] 1600 01:25:29,210 --> 01:25:32,562 -[screams] Oh! -[screams] Yeah! 1601 01:25:32,736 --> 01:25:34,520 -Hoo-hoo! -Hey, Brandy, 1602 01:25:34,693 --> 01:25:36,305 have legal draft up contracts for these guys. 1603 01:25:36,478 --> 01:25:38,219 -[Brandy] Welcome aboard! -[chuckles] 1604 01:25:38,394 --> 01:25:40,570 So, you guys start thinking of names for the new company. 1605 01:25:42,005 --> 01:25:43,486 We're gonna need a leader, man. 1606 01:25:44,139 --> 01:25:45,879 -You're hired! -Oh, Dylan, man. 1607 01:25:46,053 --> 01:25:48,925 I need a strong co-lead by my side, man! 1608 01:25:50,362 --> 01:25:52,016 You hired, bro! 1609 01:25:52,495 --> 01:25:54,148 [Brandy] I think that deserves a toast! 1610 01:25:54,323 --> 01:25:56,151 -[laughter] -Congratulations!!! 1611 01:25:56,889 --> 01:25:59,284 -[all] Cheers! -[glasses chink] 1612 01:26:06,030 --> 01:26:08,424 -You're so pretty... [chuckles] -Thank you, stop! 1613 01:26:08,946 --> 01:26:10,165 All right. Cheers. 1614 01:26:11,557 --> 01:26:13,037 [giggles] Mmm! 1615 01:26:15,648 --> 01:26:17,737 [both giggle] 1616 01:26:23,612 --> 01:26:25,484 And I would have gotten away with it, 1617 01:26:25,789 --> 01:26:29,096 if it weren't for you, Captain White Dick, 1618 01:26:30,054 --> 01:26:31,838 and Black Panther Cock. 1619 01:26:32,187 --> 01:26:35,190 [rock music] 1620 01:26:37,192 --> 01:26:39,759 [regal music] 1621 01:26:39,933 --> 01:26:41,326 -[man 1] We know... -[man 2] What you've been doing... 1622 01:26:41,500 --> 01:26:42,936 -[man 1] ...On company... -[man 2] ...Time! 1623 01:26:43,110 --> 01:26:46,201 -[moans] -Say hi to mother Russia, Brendan! 1624 01:26:46,375 --> 01:26:50,161 -[Brendan] I can't-- I can't go! I c-- let go! No! -[indistinct shouting] 1625 01:26:50,335 --> 01:26:53,469 [man 1] Your stripes are running, because you're a faketriot! 1626 01:26:53,991 --> 01:26:56,689 -This is harassment! No! -[indistinct shouting] 1627 01:26:57,386 --> 01:26:58,735 -[copier whirring] -[scoffs] 1628 01:26:59,214 --> 01:27:00,867 [blows raspberry] Pshh! 1629 01:27:01,520 --> 01:27:03,478 Don't work up a sweat and get your back all wet. 1630 01:27:04,610 --> 01:27:06,960 What did you say, Ann Coulter wannabe? 1631 01:27:07,134 --> 01:27:09,398 [scoffs] You got a problem, ese? 1632 01:27:09,572 --> 01:27:11,835 -Yeah, Nazi snowflake. -Ugh! 1633 01:27:19,451 --> 01:27:21,888 -[hip hop music] -[rapping] ♪ Put her in a box put her in a box ♪ 1634 01:27:23,150 --> 01:27:25,762 ♪ Put her in a box put her in a box ♪ 1635 01:27:26,893 --> 01:27:29,592 ♪ Put her in a box put her in a box ♪ 1636 01:27:30,070 --> 01:27:32,594 ♪ And throw away the keys to the lock ♪ 1637 01:27:32,769 --> 01:27:34,074 But, Harry! 1638 01:27:35,467 --> 01:27:36,294 [door slams] 1639 01:27:41,778 --> 01:27:43,867 Well, well, well. 1640 01:27:44,563 --> 01:27:47,262 -If it isn't my old pal, Handy Mandy. -[handcuffs jangle] 1641 01:27:47,610 --> 01:27:50,482 -Or should I say, Murder Mandy? -[gun cocks] 1642 01:27:51,744 --> 01:27:54,878 -How the fuck did you find me, Sanders? -Oh, it wasn't easy. 1643 01:27:55,487 --> 01:27:57,402 Some might even say, "Not so simple." 1644 01:27:57,576 --> 01:28:01,014 Those three men you decapitated in Tennessee. 1645 01:28:01,188 --> 01:28:03,365 The little old lady's hand you cut off. 1646 01:28:03,539 --> 01:28:04,583 Jackson Hole. 1647 01:28:05,192 --> 01:28:06,106 Seattle. 1648 01:28:06,498 --> 01:28:07,847 Houston, we have a problem. 1649 01:28:08,413 --> 01:28:10,371 -And finally-- -No, until finally, 1650 01:28:10,546 --> 01:28:12,635 I left behind a clue so obvious, 1651 01:28:12,809 --> 01:28:14,941 that even your blind ass couldn't miss it. 1652 01:28:15,333 --> 01:28:18,597 -Replacing Will's eyeballs with testicles? A little sloppy. -[chuckles] 1653 01:28:19,772 --> 01:28:22,645 Why stop, hmm? Why stop at 100 bodies? 1654 01:28:23,298 --> 01:28:25,561 Well, maybe I'm tired, Sanders? 1655 01:28:26,213 --> 01:28:29,041 Tired of all the blood and all the running, or... 1656 01:28:29,565 --> 01:28:31,610 you know, maybe I'm not! 1657 01:28:33,090 --> 01:28:34,264 -[loud gunshots] -Do you hear that? 1658 01:28:34,439 --> 01:28:35,962 No, no, no, no... Mmm... [inaudible] 1659 01:28:38,094 --> 01:28:41,316 Or maybe I just set your bitch-ass up. 1660 01:28:41,794 --> 01:28:43,100 -[dull thud] -[grunts] 1661 01:28:46,799 --> 01:28:48,758 I mean, don't flaunt it, if you're not gonna throw it. 1662 01:28:48,932 --> 01:28:50,629 -[hip hop music] -Will be getting it in! 1663 01:28:50,803 --> 01:28:52,675 Will be getting it in! 1664 01:28:52,849 --> 01:28:54,546 He don't play. I don't play. 1665 01:28:54,719 --> 01:28:56,068 That's just the way we live. 1666 01:28:56,896 --> 01:28:58,463 Will be getting it in! 1667 01:28:58,637 --> 01:29:00,813 W-- Will be getting it in! 1668 01:29:00,987 --> 01:29:02,598 He don't play. I don't play. 1669 01:29:02,772 --> 01:29:04,295 That's just the way we live. 1670 01:29:04,469 --> 01:29:05,949 That-- that's just the way we live. 1671 01:29:07,951 --> 01:29:09,648 [cuckooing] 1672 01:29:09,822 --> 01:29:12,085 [uptempo hip hop music] 1673 01:29:12,259 --> 01:29:17,047 -Bro, we're business partners now! -Bro! 1674 01:29:20,311 --> 01:29:21,268 Hey, man. 1675 01:29:22,835 --> 01:29:24,489 Now that we're business partners. 1676 01:29:25,882 --> 01:29:27,231 Can I say the N word? 1677 01:29:29,146 --> 01:29:32,584 Dude, you gave me the smallest room in your dad's crib! 1678 01:29:32,758 --> 01:29:35,413 At least there's no car there! And I'm gonna make 1679 01:29:35,587 --> 01:29:38,416 the biggest donation to those kids' tech thing. 1680 01:29:41,550 --> 01:29:43,594 All right, one free pass, yeah? 1681 01:29:43,769 --> 01:29:46,076 One free pass. All right? 1682 01:29:48,077 --> 01:29:49,035 What's up, my n--