WEBVTT FILE 1 00:00:02.000 --> 00:00:07.000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:13.000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:11.402 --> 00:00:16.233 [smooth funk music] 4 00:00:18.888 --> 00:00:20.716 Congratulations, Miles. 5 00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:23.762 The job is yours. 6 00:00:29.681 --> 00:00:31.031 [laughter] 7 00:00:32.683 --> 00:00:34.730 Miles has a millimeter Peter. 8 00:00:34.904 --> 00:00:37.211 Indians call it a "Teepee peepee!" 9 00:00:37.385 --> 00:00:40.040 -[native American chanting] -What the hell? Hey! 10 00:00:40.562 --> 00:00:42.781 Man, that's why your daddies don't want your asses! 11 00:00:43.608 --> 00:00:46.916 ["Never Wanna Grow Up" by Katrina Stone] 12 00:00:51.616 --> 00:00:53.227 -Dylan! -Fuck! 13 00:00:53.705 --> 00:00:56.273 -You got any Plan C pills? -It's Plan B? 14 00:00:56.447 --> 00:00:59.189 Look, the girl from last night said there was a Plan C pill, 15 00:00:59.363 --> 00:01:01.148 for the other raw-dog slip-up. 16 00:01:02.671 --> 00:01:03.759 She has gonorrhea. 17 00:01:13.334 --> 00:01:16.337 Oye Papi,'chu look good. 18 00:01:17.381 --> 00:01:18.208 [sighs] 19 00:01:18.991 --> 00:01:19.818 Hey, Google. 20 00:01:20.471 --> 00:01:21.994 How do you say "bullshit" 21 00:01:22.517 --> 00:01:23.735 in Spanish? 22 00:01:24.301 --> 00:01:26.042 [Google] The pronunciation is"Mierda." 23 00:01:26.651 --> 00:01:27.870 Mierda? 24 00:01:28.044 --> 00:01:30.307 -Close!"Mierda." -Murda. 25 00:01:30.873 --> 00:01:32.831 -Murda! -Damn, bitch! 26 00:01:33.005 --> 00:01:34.920 Order somepinche Rosetta,guera. 27 00:01:36.922 --> 00:01:40.187 While local law enforcement are reluctant to release any information, 28 00:01:40.360 --> 00:01:42.884 I threatened to blackmail a few anonymous sources 29 00:01:43.059 --> 00:01:45.235 down at the precinct, and found that the victim 30 00:01:45.408 --> 00:01:47.455 was simply known as "Will." 31 00:01:47.628 --> 00:01:49.805 An employee at Danrick Design, 32 00:01:49.979 --> 00:01:52.676 of what many are calling the most horrific-- 33 00:01:52.851 --> 00:01:54.592 Sir, we are recording live. 34 00:01:54.765 --> 00:01:56.899 -Thank you. -Oh, sorry. Sorry about that. 35 00:02:00.903 --> 00:02:04.472 Yo! That's my son, ese! 36 00:02:06.778 --> 00:02:07.910 Rick... 37 00:02:08.476 --> 00:02:12.088 -That was an accident. -No. Fuck that, Al. 38 00:02:12.262 --> 00:02:15.309 Rick, you know my name is Sanj? Who's Al? 39 00:02:15.483 --> 00:02:18.138 You. Al-Qaeda! 40 00:02:19.226 --> 00:02:22.272 Yeah! Terrorizing little kids. 41 00:02:23.839 --> 00:02:24.840 [screams] 42 00:02:31.151 --> 00:02:32.935 Get that ass in gear, Mom! 43 00:02:33.109 --> 00:02:35.242 Oh, calm down, Lainee! 44 00:02:35.416 --> 00:02:37.809 I'll give you calm, when I'm in a casket. 45 00:02:37.983 --> 00:02:40.377 Today? Today's carpe-motherfucking-diem. 46 00:02:40.725 --> 00:02:43.989 I'm on my grind, Mom, and unless you want to end up like those losers, 47 00:02:44.164 --> 00:02:45.730 I suggest you do the same. 48 00:02:46.296 --> 00:02:48.385 ♪ Farther than our eyes have ever seen ♪ 49 00:02:48.559 --> 00:02:50.735 ♪ I don't wanna grow up ♪ 50 00:02:55.523 --> 00:02:59.004 [horns honking] 51 00:02:59.179 --> 00:03:03.226 ♪ Lately, could we misbehave a bit more? ♪ 52 00:03:03.400 --> 00:03:05.794 ♪ Never know what's in store ♪ 53 00:03:05.968 --> 00:03:08.275 ♪ When we're rowdy and bored ♪ 54 00:03:08.449 --> 00:03:13.018 ♪ Honey, can we catch some floating fireflies? ♪ 55 00:03:13.193 --> 00:03:15.456 ♪ Let 'em light our way tonight ♪ 56 00:03:15.630 --> 00:03:17.980 ♪ Through the Neverland skies ♪ 57 00:03:18.154 --> 00:03:21.113 ♪ All the whole night through ♪ 58 00:03:21.810 --> 00:03:26.293 ♪ 'Cause we don't wanna grow up ♪ 59 00:03:26.466 --> 00:03:28.512 ♪ We just wanna be young ♪ 60 00:03:28.686 --> 00:03:30.949 [music fades] 61 00:03:31.123 --> 00:03:33.909 Seriously, am I, like, the lost Kardashian or something? 62 00:03:34.692 --> 00:03:36.128 If the dating scene weren't lame enough, 63 00:03:36.303 --> 00:03:37.781 I post a few squat pics at the gym, 64 00:03:37.956 --> 00:03:39.436 and there's Black dudes in my DMs, 65 00:03:39.610 --> 00:03:41.699 like I was handing out child support pardons. 66 00:03:44.876 --> 00:03:46.965 Come on. This used to be our norm. 67 00:03:47.139 --> 00:03:48.706 I know, it's just-- 68 00:03:49.446 --> 00:03:52.710 [indistinct talking in background] 69 00:03:56.105 --> 00:03:59.021 [shouting in background] 70 00:04:00.065 --> 00:04:01.458 -Yo? -Yerp! 71 00:04:01.632 --> 00:04:04.156 Will's wife could barely carry that box, like, 72 00:04:05.114 --> 00:04:07.421 how the hell could she have let his body hang like that? 73 00:04:07.595 --> 00:04:10.075 Man, all I know is, Mandy told me that Will's wife 74 00:04:10.250 --> 00:04:12.687 was calling and talking crazy! 75 00:04:12.861 --> 00:04:15.690 Will was scared as shit! 76 00:04:15.864 --> 00:04:17.995 Hey, who do you think they'll tag for his position? 77 00:04:19.737 --> 00:04:21.826 His seat still has his warm ass prints. 78 00:04:22.349 --> 00:04:24.481 -They won't replace him that quickly. -[chuckles] 79 00:04:24.655 --> 00:04:26.353 Did you forget who our boss is? 80 00:04:28.529 --> 00:04:31.009 Press your index and thumb together as hard as you can? 81 00:04:33.055 --> 00:04:34.970 That's how many fucks she gives. 82 00:04:35.927 --> 00:04:39.017 Oh, her balls are bigger than yours. 83 00:04:42.891 --> 00:04:45.720 You know, you'll probably be the first up to get promoted to his position. 84 00:04:46.851 --> 00:04:48.505 That kind of power could be sexy. 85 00:04:49.201 --> 00:04:50.420 [inhales] 86 00:04:50.594 --> 00:04:53.380 [coughs violently] 87 00:04:55.120 --> 00:04:56.207 Or Miles. 88 00:04:58.994 --> 00:05:00.604 Hmm, God bless America with tetas. 89 00:05:00.778 --> 00:05:02.693 Hey, guys. Great day, right? 90 00:05:02.867 --> 00:05:04.391 -Wonderful. -[sighs] Hmm. 91 00:05:07.394 --> 00:05:10.005 Yo, so who do you think they gonna tag for Will's job? 92 00:05:10.179 --> 00:05:11.528 It might be you, dawg! 93 00:05:11.876 --> 00:05:14.096 You or Dylan. Fuck that White boy, though. 94 00:05:14.966 --> 00:05:16.968 Ami doesn't even know I'm an employee, bro. 95 00:05:17.665 --> 00:05:20.102 Yesterday, I had on a brown shirt. 96 00:05:20.276 --> 00:05:22.322 Why she hand me UPS Boxes, bruh? 97 00:05:22.496 --> 00:05:24.280 [clears throat] 98 00:05:29.416 --> 00:05:30.634 Thanks, Miles. 99 00:05:31.461 --> 00:05:34.116 You know, if anybody else gets that promotion, 100 00:05:34.551 --> 00:05:35.944 I think it should be you. 101 00:05:36.510 --> 00:05:38.990 If our profits don't go up, you're going to get fired. 102 00:05:39.164 --> 00:05:42.690 -"I can't, I have a family, and a house, and a--" -[phone rings] 103 00:05:42.864 --> 00:05:45.780 -DanRick Designs, your hole is our goal. -Hello. Hey, this is José. 104 00:05:45.954 --> 00:05:49.174 I... [coughs] I don't think I'm going to be able to make it in today. 105 00:05:49.349 --> 00:05:51.568 -So you're calling off? -No, no. 106 00:05:51.742 --> 00:05:54.397 I wish I could be at work, seriously. 107 00:05:54.571 --> 00:05:57.139 -It's just, I'm really sick. -Right, right. 108 00:05:57.313 --> 00:06:01.012 So, typically, when a person calls to say they need a day off, 109 00:06:01.186 --> 00:06:02.927 those in the united human kingdom 110 00:06:03.101 --> 00:06:04.668 refer to that as a "call off." 111 00:06:04.842 --> 00:06:06.322 I'm not really into labels. 112 00:06:08.933 --> 00:06:10.195 Thank you for covering. 113 00:06:10.370 --> 00:06:12.328 -Gracias. -Oh, totally cool. 114 00:06:12.502 --> 00:06:14.504 If only I could spend more of my internship 115 00:06:14.678 --> 00:06:17.332 learning the valuable skill of phone answering. 116 00:06:17.507 --> 00:06:19.335 I bet I could save a ton in tuition, 117 00:06:19.509 --> 00:06:21.859 and maybe even skip college altogether. 118 00:06:22.033 --> 00:06:24.819 [chuckles] You know, sweetie, being a receptionist, 119 00:06:24.993 --> 00:06:27.169 there's more to it than just answering phones. 120 00:06:27.343 --> 00:06:30.651 Oh, you mean, hanging them up is a different set of classes? 121 00:06:30.825 --> 00:06:33.915 -Why, you little-- -When exactly does that fashion training kick in? 122 00:06:34.089 --> 00:06:36.308 Ugh! Dresses like these 123 00:06:36.483 --> 00:06:38.746 are muchocritically to the Latino culture. 124 00:06:38.920 --> 00:06:41.401 -Then why are you wearing it? -Ugh! 125 00:06:41.575 --> 00:06:43.838 Mier-- fuck! 126 00:06:44.316 --> 00:06:46.797 ♪ Living good I'm living great ♪ 127 00:06:46.971 --> 00:06:49.757 ♪ Everything I do I do it in first place ♪ 128 00:06:49.931 --> 00:06:53.369 ♪ I said I'm living good I'm living great ♪ 129 00:06:53.543 --> 00:06:56.981 ♪ Everything I do I do it in first place, yeah ♪ 130 00:06:57.155 --> 00:07:00.811 ♪ Yeah, watch my money grow watch my money grow, like a-- ♪ 131 00:07:00.985 --> 00:07:03.510 ♪ Watch my money grow like a proud parent ♪ 132 00:07:03.684 --> 00:07:07.644 ♪ Yeah, my money ain't old and it's colder than a snow bunny ♪ 133 00:07:07.818 --> 00:07:09.907 ♪ Happy getting money, honey ♪ 134 00:07:10.691 --> 00:07:14.085 -[sharp thud] -Perhaps I was unclear at our last meeting, 135 00:07:14.259 --> 00:07:17.349 when I provided a simple set of goals 136 00:07:17.524 --> 00:07:18.829 for this quarter. Lainee? 137 00:07:20.701 --> 00:07:23.486 Double digit turnaround in revenue and profit margins, 138 00:07:23.660 --> 00:07:25.096 by the time we're reconvened. 139 00:07:25.662 --> 00:07:27.664 Super sorry I'm late, guys, I had some... 140 00:07:28.491 --> 00:07:31.320 congestion in the network. 141 00:07:31.494 --> 00:07:33.844 -This nigga was taking a dookie. -[laughter] 142 00:07:34.018 --> 00:07:35.933 He done backed up the whole damn toilet. 143 00:07:36.107 --> 00:07:37.674 Look, it's a lot of shit in that motherfucker, 144 00:07:37.848 --> 00:07:39.459 and I don't get paid for all that. 145 00:07:40.938 --> 00:07:42.331 You're a janitor. 146 00:07:42.505 --> 00:07:44.725 That's exactly why you get paid. And, uh-- 147 00:07:45.639 --> 00:07:49.425 -Anyways, what makes you think it was me? -[chuckles] 148 00:07:49.599 --> 00:07:52.733 I done seen them little broke-ass, Brooks Brothers wannabe shoes 149 00:07:52.907 --> 00:07:55.605 -and your little feet just twitching under the door. -[all laugh] 150 00:07:55.779 --> 00:07:58.303 Look, I don't get paid to kick people's asses either. 151 00:07:58.478 --> 00:08:00.131 Don't make me go pro-bono. 152 00:08:02.699 --> 00:08:05.267 [whimsical music] 153 00:08:09.532 --> 00:08:11.534 I'm supposed to be IT. 154 00:08:13.057 --> 00:08:15.756 -Not S-H-I-T. -[laughter] 155 00:08:15.930 --> 00:08:18.367 ["West Coast Thang" by Nipsey Hussle feat. KrsTQ & Ill Will] 156 00:08:30.466 --> 00:08:31.902 [phone rings] 157 00:08:32.076 --> 00:08:34.470 DanRick Designs, where your hole is our goal! 158 00:08:34.644 --> 00:08:36.645 Hey, sis. Qué pasa en la raza? 159 00:08:36.820 --> 00:08:37.995 María? 160 00:08:38.169 --> 00:08:39.301 Oh, hey. 161 00:08:40.258 --> 00:08:41.433 You cut out. 162 00:08:41.782 --> 00:08:42.913 Qué haciendo? 163 00:08:43.087 --> 00:08:46.003 I can't hear you, uh, bad signal! 164 00:08:47.439 --> 00:08:48.745 Enough grab-ass! 165 00:08:49.137 --> 00:08:50.965 Department reports! HR. 166 00:08:52.357 --> 00:08:57.058 Uh, today we'll be honoring a couple of our esteemed colleagues. 167 00:08:57.232 --> 00:09:00.670 First, we'll have a memorial for everyone's favorite co-worker, Will. 168 00:09:00.844 --> 00:09:01.758 We have some-- 169 00:09:03.238 --> 00:09:06.197 We have some great video from the charities he helped. Spoiler alert! 170 00:09:06.371 --> 00:09:08.722 There were plenty, so bring Kleenex. A little later, we'll lighten the mood, 171 00:09:08.896 --> 00:09:10.724 as we celebrate Juan's b-day. Who doesn't love free cake? 172 00:09:10.898 --> 00:09:12.639 -Just need a small donation from everyone. -I don't like it. 173 00:09:12.813 --> 00:09:13.944 We don't like it. 174 00:09:14.684 --> 00:09:17.818 -Uh, don't like which--- -Any of it. 175 00:09:18.732 --> 00:09:20.124 [whispering] He may cry again. 176 00:09:21.299 --> 00:09:24.172 You have ten minutes. 12:50 to 1:00 p.m. Make it work. 177 00:09:24.346 --> 00:09:25.521 Next, IT. 178 00:09:25.695 --> 00:09:28.132 [traditional Indian music] 179 00:09:38.012 --> 00:09:40.362 I said, "I'm on my way to LA." 180 00:09:40.884 --> 00:09:42.233 Going to surprise you and your new bae. 181 00:09:42.407 --> 00:09:44.453 My new bae, right. 182 00:09:44.627 --> 00:09:45.976 Um... 183 00:09:46.150 --> 00:09:47.717 What's Señor Caliente's name, anyway? 184 00:09:48.500 --> 00:09:50.677 -Um, uh... -[frantic clicking] 185 00:09:50.851 --> 00:09:54.115 Juan Guapo Hungrod Martinez. 186 00:09:54.550 --> 00:09:56.857 Oh, he sounds super south of the border. 187 00:09:57.597 --> 00:09:59.947 Might be some Eas' Los sangre in you yet,chica. 188 00:10:00.121 --> 00:10:02.210 Sí,major sí. 189 00:10:02.558 --> 00:10:05.343 Uh, I thought about what you and Mom had said. 190 00:10:05.517 --> 00:10:09.870 Dad and aunty Patricia, uncle Hector, our neighbors, 191 00:10:10.044 --> 00:10:12.002 the old lady who does my nails. 192 00:10:13.264 --> 00:10:16.311 Anyone could read Latin studies, 193 00:10:16.703 --> 00:10:19.836 but not everyone could live the Latin culture. 194 00:10:20.228 --> 00:10:21.403 Ay, mija,look at you! 195 00:10:22.230 --> 00:10:23.797 When I get down there, I'm gonna swing over to trabajo. 196 00:10:23.971 --> 00:10:25.494 So, este... 197 00:10:26.277 --> 00:10:27.714 What did you say his name was again? 198 00:10:27.888 --> 00:10:30.281 Juan Guapo Hungrod Martinez. 199 00:10:30.455 --> 00:10:31.631 Juan Guapo. 200 00:10:32.414 --> 00:10:33.894 Get him to meet us for lunch. 201 00:10:34.068 --> 00:10:35.330 I want to see what he's all about, qué no? 202 00:10:35.504 --> 00:10:37.811 K, yes, but he's kind of a boss who-- 203 00:10:37.985 --> 00:10:39.639 El jefe? 204 00:10:39.813 --> 00:10:41.858 So he shouldn't have any problem meeting with us, pues. 205 00:10:42.032 --> 00:10:44.078 [whimpers] 206 00:10:44.687 --> 00:10:46.036 Oh! 207 00:10:46.602 --> 00:10:48.256 Next up, Innovations. 208 00:10:48.822 --> 00:10:50.606 -New development today. -Really exciting news! 209 00:10:50.780 --> 00:10:53.348 [tense dramatic music] 210 00:10:53.957 --> 00:10:57.047 Well, this is some really exciting news. 211 00:10:58.005 --> 00:10:59.876 And this is pretty cutting edge. 212 00:11:00.050 --> 00:11:01.835 [Ami] Oh, I just remembered. 213 00:11:02.487 --> 00:11:06.187 Will was great... but he's dead. 214 00:11:06.927 --> 00:11:10.104 Silver lining, we'll be having open interviews for his position. 215 00:11:10.278 --> 00:11:13.237 We've already narrowed down our finalists to Dylan and Miles. 216 00:11:13.411 --> 00:11:14.499 [grunting] 217 00:11:16.806 --> 00:11:20.244 Hey, hey... [chuckles] 218 00:11:20.418 --> 00:11:24.814 Yo! It's going di-di-di-di down down, son! 219 00:11:25.597 --> 00:11:27.817 Finally, move out of your parents' garage! 220 00:11:27.991 --> 00:11:31.429 Yeah, bro! Still kind of surprised Ami even knows I'm alive. 221 00:11:31.603 --> 00:11:34.694 [laughing] Hey, yo, hey, yo. I got to call my pops! 222 00:11:34.868 --> 00:11:36.870 Dale!Go ahead, bro! 223 00:11:37.044 --> 00:11:39.960 [salsa music] 224 00:11:43.398 --> 00:11:45.530 I told you, I told you! 225 00:11:45.705 --> 00:11:47.707 [inhales deeply] 226 00:11:49.056 --> 00:11:50.057 Uh... 227 00:11:51.145 --> 00:11:53.016 If I get this promotion, 228 00:11:54.322 --> 00:11:55.758 I'm taking you out. 229 00:11:56.498 --> 00:11:58.718 Get you all dolled up, 230 00:11:58.892 --> 00:12:00.023 and then... 231 00:12:02.417 --> 00:12:04.201 You know, if you... 232 00:12:05.246 --> 00:12:08.597 If you ever wanted food or beverages... 233 00:12:09.598 --> 00:12:10.599 ever. 234 00:12:12.340 --> 00:12:13.297 Whatever. 235 00:12:13.471 --> 00:12:14.995 Well, I do have 236 00:12:15.169 --> 00:12:16.648 this manipulative red dress, 237 00:12:16.823 --> 00:12:19.869 -I've been waiting to, um-- -Oh, manipulative. 238 00:12:20.043 --> 00:12:21.741 Oh! 239 00:12:22.306 --> 00:12:24.047 I've got to go call my mum real quick. 240 00:12:24.221 --> 00:12:25.832 [phone rings] 241 00:12:27.311 --> 00:12:28.486 Great minds, right? 242 00:12:29.270 --> 00:12:32.142 I was literally debating if ten minutes 243 00:12:32.316 --> 00:12:33.840 was enough time just to get-- 244 00:12:34.014 --> 00:12:36.451 Laurie Caldwell needs to be fired. 245 00:12:37.669 --> 00:12:39.933 Oh, okay. I can start a paper-- 246 00:12:40.107 --> 00:12:41.586 -Today. -By noon. 247 00:12:42.239 --> 00:12:43.937 That's all. Thank you. 248 00:12:44.589 --> 00:12:46.374 Deuces, with a discount. 249 00:12:46.548 --> 00:12:48.245 [whimsical music] 250 00:12:52.989 --> 00:12:55.296 Look, I just need him to show up for a few hours. 251 00:12:55.470 --> 00:12:57.341 I'm not even worried about the sex part. 252 00:12:58.560 --> 00:13:01.171 Well, I mean, if it's that big, and it's part of the price... 253 00:13:01.345 --> 00:13:02.738 [lock beeps and clicks] 254 00:13:04.653 --> 00:13:05.523 Hey, Juan. 255 00:13:06.742 --> 00:13:09.484 How come we've never gone out for some drinks? 256 00:13:09.658 --> 00:13:12.052 Because my mom would kill me for dating a White girl. 257 00:13:12.487 --> 00:13:13.923 But I'm not. 258 00:13:17.187 --> 00:13:19.668 Hey, Sanj. Got a second? 259 00:13:19.842 --> 00:13:21.409 [phone rings] 260 00:13:24.151 --> 00:13:25.152 Hey, uh... 261 00:13:26.327 --> 00:13:27.719 Congrats on the opportunity. 262 00:13:28.677 --> 00:13:30.070 Yeah, yeah. You too. 263 00:13:30.592 --> 00:13:32.812 [light dramatic music] 264 00:13:33.334 --> 00:13:35.379 Hey, may the best man win. 265 00:13:38.818 --> 00:13:41.298 Yep. And the best way we can honor Will, 266 00:13:41.472 --> 00:13:44.214 is commit the same level of dedication and results 267 00:13:44.388 --> 00:13:45.563 to his clients like you. 268 00:13:47.261 --> 00:13:48.262 Sure! 269 00:13:48.436 --> 00:13:49.785 I'd be honored to work with you. 270 00:13:50.568 --> 00:13:52.832 If you could just let Ami know you'd prefer me 271 00:13:53.006 --> 00:13:54.485 overseeing your portfolio... 272 00:13:56.270 --> 00:13:57.401 [chuckles] Sounds good. 273 00:13:57.837 --> 00:13:59.708 Hey-- not if I see you first. 274 00:13:59.882 --> 00:14:01.449 [chuckles] 275 00:14:03.103 --> 00:14:05.235 How did you know the victim, Will, 276 00:14:05.409 --> 00:14:07.237 or any details of his crime? 277 00:14:07.411 --> 00:14:09.936 Yo, this is Bron. Purp' n' gold gang all day. 278 00:14:10.110 --> 00:14:11.502 R.I.P to my girl, Kathy tha-- 279 00:14:11.676 --> 00:14:13.504 Did you happen to know the victim, Will, 280 00:14:13.678 --> 00:14:15.550 or any details in regards to his murder? 281 00:14:15.724 --> 00:14:18.814 Oh, yeah. Yeah! For real, for-- for sure. 282 00:14:18.988 --> 00:14:20.990 Yeah, Will be getting it in. [chuckles] 283 00:14:21.164 --> 00:14:23.514 -Oh, "Will be getting it in"? -Oh, yes. Yes. 284 00:14:23.688 --> 00:14:25.690 Will definitely be getting it in. 285 00:14:25.865 --> 00:14:27.562 You feel me? He don't play. 286 00:14:27.736 --> 00:14:28.911 I don't play. 287 00:14:29.651 --> 00:14:31.871 -That's just the way we live. Yeah. -Oh, so-- 288 00:14:32.045 --> 00:14:33.829 so you two were well acquainted? 289 00:14:35.265 --> 00:14:36.353 Wha-- what that mean? 290 00:14:37.180 --> 00:14:40.401 You were close? You knew each other? 291 00:14:40.575 --> 00:14:43.230 Uh, wasn't nobody humping around, if that's what that mean. 292 00:14:43.404 --> 00:14:46.102 -[reporter] Oh, okay. Okay, well... -[Bron] Yeah. 293 00:14:46.276 --> 00:14:47.712 ...thank you so much for your time today. 294 00:14:47.887 --> 00:14:49.497 All right, all right, all right, all right. 295 00:14:49.671 --> 00:14:53.544 Did I know Will? Technically, no. 296 00:14:53.718 --> 00:14:56.939 -But, I do think-- No, wait one second. -Okay. Thank you so much. 297 00:14:57.113 --> 00:14:59.681 -I do think that he copped my mixtape from the store... -No, thank you so much for-- 298 00:14:59.855 --> 00:15:01.988 -...downtown, Mr. PussyPatter. -Thank you so much for coming today, sir. 299 00:15:02.162 --> 00:15:04.164 [coughing] 300 00:15:04.773 --> 00:15:06.383 Hey, Ant. Uh... 301 00:15:06.557 --> 00:15:08.298 How long you been under there? 302 00:15:10.039 --> 00:15:10.953 I don't know. 303 00:15:13.216 --> 00:15:14.174 Help your boy out. 304 00:15:14.914 --> 00:15:16.916 See if you can get that third stall unclogged, 305 00:15:17.090 --> 00:15:19.005 because one of you, ladies, 306 00:15:19.179 --> 00:15:22.617 has been dropping some real gender neutral logs. 307 00:15:22.791 --> 00:15:24.271 [fast banging] 308 00:15:24.445 --> 00:15:25.750 Yeah... 309 00:15:25.925 --> 00:15:27.752 Oh, yeah, baby! 310 00:15:27.927 --> 00:15:30.842 Here I come to save the day! 311 00:15:31.713 --> 00:15:34.455 Yeah, here I come, alright. 312 00:15:35.499 --> 00:15:36.500 Come on, baby! 313 00:15:36.674 --> 00:15:38.241 [inhales sharply] 314 00:15:38.807 --> 00:15:41.288 -Somebody's getting fired! -It wasn't company Wi-Fi! 315 00:15:41.897 --> 00:15:43.986 Like, when is firing part of my job? 316 00:15:44.682 --> 00:15:46.684 Guys, it's safe sex! 317 00:15:46.858 --> 00:15:51.341 I-- I update Norton's virus protection every week, mostly. 318 00:15:52.038 --> 00:15:54.170 Oh, come on, Harry! 319 00:15:54.344 --> 00:15:57.957 Rent's due, I have a few online subscriptions in collections. 320 00:15:58.131 --> 00:16:01.612 I-- I just put the whole 50 Shadestrilogy 321 00:16:01.786 --> 00:16:03.049 in my Amazon cart! 322 00:16:03.658 --> 00:16:06.052 It was the Gold Box Deal of the Day! 323 00:16:06.748 --> 00:16:08.663 [cries hysterically] 324 00:16:09.751 --> 00:16:14.495 I'm trying to put a Russian co-ed through an American college, man! 325 00:16:15.148 --> 00:16:18.716 And all she has are her precious entrepreneurial... 326 00:16:19.848 --> 00:16:21.502 ...booty videos. 327 00:16:22.459 --> 00:16:23.983 [cries hysterically] 328 00:16:25.462 --> 00:16:26.550 What are you talking about? 329 00:16:28.552 --> 00:16:30.946 Wait. What are-- what are you talking about? 330 00:16:31.860 --> 00:16:34.558 Laurie Caldwell. The boss says I need to fire her. 331 00:16:34.732 --> 00:16:36.473 I've never fired anyone before! 332 00:16:36.647 --> 00:16:37.822 Wait. 333 00:16:38.432 --> 00:16:40.912 You're area HR, and you've never fired? 334 00:16:41.522 --> 00:16:43.089 [laughs] 335 00:16:43.654 --> 00:16:46.396 Well, got a real whale dick to bust your cherry. 336 00:16:46.570 --> 00:16:48.659 [laughs] Yo! 337 00:16:49.965 --> 00:16:52.533 Laurie, right? Laurie Loophole? 338 00:16:53.229 --> 00:16:56.363 Yeah, they've been trying to fire her for, like, seven years. 339 00:16:58.887 --> 00:17:01.194 Ami's been through eight area HR managers 340 00:17:01.368 --> 00:17:03.152 who all, quote, "Fired Laurie." 341 00:17:03.805 --> 00:17:06.242 But every time, she's come back with a lawsuit settlement 342 00:17:06.415 --> 00:17:07.590 and a big-ass pay raise. 343 00:17:08.853 --> 00:17:11.464 ♪ Laurie Loophole finds a way ♪ 344 00:17:11.638 --> 00:17:14.381 ♪ To get that, get that get that pay! Oh! ♪ 345 00:17:16.948 --> 00:17:19.255 You know, like the ruple? 346 00:17:19.907 --> 00:17:21.823 [phone rings] 347 00:17:21.997 --> 00:17:24.565 Mom, I have great news. 348 00:17:24.739 --> 00:17:27.046 [Dylan's mom] Oh, that's wonderful, Dilly-Dilly! 349 00:17:27.220 --> 00:17:29.178 Steve and I have good news too! 350 00:17:29.352 --> 00:17:31.485 -Pop! -[Miles' pop] Boy, why is you yelling? 351 00:17:31.659 --> 00:17:32.921 I got great news, pop. 352 00:17:33.095 --> 00:17:35.097 Oh, I got something for you too! 353 00:17:35.271 --> 00:17:37.143 -They selected me for a promotion! -I was selected for a promotion. 354 00:17:37.317 --> 00:17:38.970 -Well, I mean, I'm a finalist, but... -Well, I'm a finalist, 355 00:17:39.145 --> 00:17:41.582 -it's me and this Black guy. -...it's me and this White dude. 356 00:17:41.756 --> 00:17:43.279 [Miles' pop] Ooh... 357 00:17:43.453 --> 00:17:47.196 -What this mean, "Ooh"? -Come on, son. 358 00:17:47.370 --> 00:17:50.808 Don't be ignorant. It means your Black-ass ain't got no chance. 359 00:17:50.982 --> 00:17:53.594 Just because he's Black, doesn't mean that I-- 360 00:17:53.768 --> 00:17:55.813 [Dylan's mom] Oh, come on, Dilly-Dilly. 361 00:17:55.987 --> 00:17:57.946 You know how they treat Blacks now! 362 00:17:58.120 --> 00:18:02.429 All the reversed racism as is, and discriminated lawsuits. 363 00:18:02.603 --> 00:18:04.344 Oh, God. 364 00:18:04.909 --> 00:18:06.172 But I'm good at what I do. 365 00:18:06.346 --> 00:18:08.130 [Miles' pop] Boy, you ain't shit! 366 00:18:08.304 --> 00:18:10.698 I'm a gardener. Your granddaddy was a gardener. 367 00:18:10.872 --> 00:18:13.570 Hell, it's probably some old slave, cotton fields DNA shit. 368 00:18:13.744 --> 00:18:16.051 Word. That's how DNA works, Pop? 369 00:18:16.225 --> 00:18:17.835 [Dylan's mom] You're the smartest cookie on the planet, 370 00:18:18.009 --> 00:18:20.055 but minorities don't have to be as smart 371 00:18:20.229 --> 00:18:21.839 or as talented to get ahead. 372 00:18:22.013 --> 00:18:23.580 It's a colored man's world. 373 00:18:23.754 --> 00:18:25.278 We're just lucky to get gravity. 374 00:18:25.843 --> 00:18:27.193 But I'm good. 375 00:18:27.671 --> 00:18:30.631 You're good, but you're not Black. 376 00:18:31.849 --> 00:18:34.025 [Miles' pop] You're doing good, but don't fool yourself. 377 00:18:34.200 --> 00:18:35.592 It's in the White man's garden. 378 00:18:35.766 --> 00:18:37.290 And we just handle their manure. 379 00:18:37.464 --> 00:18:38.726 [Dylan's mom] For my good news, 380 00:18:38.900 --> 00:18:41.076 Steve and I are selling the house! 381 00:18:41.946 --> 00:18:43.600 What do you mean, "Selling the house"? 382 00:18:43.905 --> 00:18:45.559 Dad bought that land. 383 00:18:45.733 --> 00:18:47.387 He built the house from the first brick. 384 00:18:47.561 --> 00:18:50.433 Oh, I know, I know, but Steve wants to take me 385 00:18:50.607 --> 00:18:52.914 to sail the Mexicos. We need the money. 386 00:18:53.088 --> 00:18:55.482 I told him I am not eating chimichangas all day, 387 00:18:55.656 --> 00:18:57.179 -but-- -Fuck Steve! 388 00:18:57.353 --> 00:18:58.702 Hey...[scoffs] 389 00:18:59.442 --> 00:19:01.749 Steve was there for me after your dad passed. 390 00:19:02.358 --> 00:19:03.185 My dad. 391 00:19:04.404 --> 00:19:05.970 Your husband! 392 00:19:06.536 --> 00:19:08.364 30 years, remember? 393 00:19:08.538 --> 00:19:10.932 [Miles' pop] Oh, Mr. Rubin from the center called. 394 00:19:11.106 --> 00:19:13.717 Said the donations dried up and they have to close the doors. 395 00:19:13.891 --> 00:19:17.156 What? When was this? If they close, those kids will be on the streets. 396 00:19:17.330 --> 00:19:20.507 -Their biz, not mine. -My tech kids have been busting their asses 397 00:19:20.681 --> 00:19:22.291 for the Robo-Tech Competition next month, 398 00:19:22.465 --> 00:19:24.337 and they were building a kids' size Voltron. 399 00:19:24.511 --> 00:19:25.903 He said unless you come up 400 00:19:26.077 --> 00:19:27.992 with the entry and transport fees, 401 00:19:28.167 --> 00:19:31.387 -y'all have to withdraw. -Those kids' future depends on this. 402 00:19:31.561 --> 00:19:33.520 -I'll get the money. -I'm gonna get the money. 403 00:19:33.998 --> 00:19:36.436 -I'm gonna get that promotion. -I'm gonna get that promotion. 404 00:19:38.786 --> 00:19:40.962 [machine whirring] 405 00:19:41.528 --> 00:19:43.007 -Have you been working out? -No. 406 00:19:43.791 --> 00:19:47.360 -Been on any good dates lately? -Like with real women? Also no. 407 00:19:48.317 --> 00:19:52.278 Well, what if I set you up with this spicy little Latin number? 408 00:19:52.452 --> 00:19:54.149 Is this some sort of green card scam? 409 00:19:54.323 --> 00:19:56.020 No, God, no. 410 00:19:56.195 --> 00:19:58.197 She is super American. 411 00:20:01.983 --> 00:20:04.028 -How American? -Like... 412 00:20:04.464 --> 00:20:07.336 watching Pitch Perfectwith a cold slice of pumpkin pie... 413 00:20:07.510 --> 00:20:09.773 [both] And a dollop of cinnamon whipped cream! 414 00:20:09.947 --> 00:20:11.514 [both laugh] 415 00:20:11.688 --> 00:20:14.691 Well, make sure she's got the spicy, 416 00:20:14.865 --> 00:20:18.129 because I got the curry for sure-y. 417 00:20:18.304 --> 00:20:21.132 -Chic-chica! -[distorted voice] Oh, yeah! 418 00:20:22.525 --> 00:20:25.224 I don't fucking get it. 419 00:20:26.094 --> 00:20:29.053 There's money and there's bullshit. 420 00:20:29.402 --> 00:20:31.230 Which one do you think I prefer to talk about? 421 00:20:32.231 --> 00:20:33.493 I'm not my dad. 422 00:20:33.667 --> 00:20:35.234 [suspenseful music] 423 00:20:35.408 --> 00:20:37.497 First things first. Lainee, crack run. 424 00:20:37.671 --> 00:20:40.064 My usual. Don't make my day any worse. 425 00:20:40.630 --> 00:20:42.502 [Lainee hums] 426 00:20:43.372 --> 00:20:45.679 I don't have time for all the formalities. 427 00:20:46.375 --> 00:20:48.072 So, I merged your two interviews together. 428 00:20:48.769 --> 00:20:50.597 You have three words or less, 429 00:20:50.771 --> 00:20:51.989 preferably less, 430 00:20:52.163 --> 00:20:53.513 to tell me why you want the job. 431 00:20:54.557 --> 00:20:57.038 No fake work bullshit, okay? Go. 432 00:20:57.778 --> 00:21:01.477 Uh... Mom selling dad! 433 00:21:01.651 --> 00:21:04.741 [music intensifies] 434 00:21:04.915 --> 00:21:06.003 Center shut down! 435 00:21:07.701 --> 00:21:11.139 First, second. Though, you were both so underwhelming. 436 00:21:11.313 --> 00:21:15.186 You know what? I don't need another soft-ass Will. 437 00:21:15.361 --> 00:21:17.667 I need a fucking killer. 438 00:21:18.233 --> 00:21:20.757 Someone that's going to help this company hide a body... 439 00:21:21.845 --> 00:21:22.977 if we need to. 440 00:21:24.283 --> 00:21:26.763 -Maybe I misjudged-- -[phone buzzing] 441 00:21:27.677 --> 00:21:29.113 Hey, Jim. 442 00:21:30.158 --> 00:21:33.074 Good to hear from you too! You both failed. 443 00:21:34.641 --> 00:21:36.904 That means get the fuck out! 444 00:21:37.948 --> 00:21:40.516 Oh, so sad about Will. 445 00:21:40.690 --> 00:21:43.693 Yeah, we're all still just reeling over here. 446 00:21:44.303 --> 00:21:46.566 I can't stop crying... Yeah. 447 00:21:47.088 --> 00:21:49.264 [whimsical music] 448 00:21:50.134 --> 00:21:51.266 Okay. 449 00:21:52.006 --> 00:21:54.835 It's okay, alright? Peop-- People get fired every day. 450 00:21:55.009 --> 00:21:58.447 If the boss wants her fired... "You're out of here!" 451 00:21:59.448 --> 00:22:01.320 Better her than me. 452 00:22:01.494 --> 00:22:03.670 I do my job, and I do it damn good. 453 00:22:03.844 --> 00:22:06.847 Ever since little Harry was second grade pencil sharpening monitor. 454 00:22:07.021 --> 00:22:09.153 You think anybody had any pencil pokes that year? Any lead poisoning? 455 00:22:09.328 --> 00:22:11.721 Not on my watch. Not on my watch! 456 00:22:12.243 --> 00:22:13.506 -Brendan! -Gah! 457 00:22:13.810 --> 00:22:17.118 Uh, your speech, it was inspiring, 458 00:22:17.292 --> 00:22:19.120 it got my adrenaline pumping. 459 00:22:19.294 --> 00:22:21.862 Um, you have something... 460 00:22:25.431 --> 00:22:26.954 No, it's-- 461 00:22:27.955 --> 00:22:29.870 -Still? -Uh, it's more... 462 00:22:30.044 --> 00:22:31.262 What, man? 463 00:22:34.135 --> 00:22:35.049 [gasps] 464 00:22:37.181 --> 00:22:38.879 You need to run harassment training today. 465 00:22:39.053 --> 00:22:39.967 I need to mask up... 466 00:22:41.838 --> 00:22:43.623 and then go fire a bitch. 467 00:22:44.101 --> 00:22:45.364 [stapler clicks] 468 00:22:46.669 --> 00:22:48.062 It couldn't be that bad. 469 00:22:49.368 --> 00:22:51.718 Bad is driving your dad's car into the Whomping Willow. 470 00:22:51.892 --> 00:22:53.197 I'd take that over this any day. 471 00:22:54.024 --> 00:22:57.637 It's like Harry playing Quidditch without his Firebolt. 472 00:22:58.072 --> 00:23:00.248 Damn! Seriously? 473 00:23:01.292 --> 00:23:04.818 I could've done better selling Black Lives Matter shirts at a tea party rally. 474 00:23:04.992 --> 00:23:08.343 If it means anything, Ami said I came in first. 475 00:23:08.517 --> 00:23:09.475 Aight! 476 00:23:09.649 --> 00:23:10.911 Nah, brah. 477 00:23:13.130 --> 00:23:16.612 Bro! You know, when you have sex with a new female, 478 00:23:17.265 --> 00:23:19.572 you don't even recognize your own cock anymore. 479 00:23:19.746 --> 00:23:21.835 Yo, what the fuck are you talking about? 480 00:23:22.401 --> 00:23:25.012 We got to get extra hard, papi! 481 00:23:25.186 --> 00:23:28.755 Fuck being a field nigga! It's Birth of a Nation time, master! 482 00:23:28.929 --> 00:23:32.236 And we're ready for all you motherfuckers! 483 00:23:32.411 --> 00:23:35.588 We built this nation. It's time we take it back. 484 00:23:37.241 --> 00:23:39.722 -What do you mean? -I mean, look at them. 485 00:23:40.288 --> 00:23:43.247 Conspiring, thinking what else they can steal. 486 00:23:43.900 --> 00:23:45.206 Not this time, Kunta. 487 00:23:45.772 --> 00:23:47.513 Them ankles are mine, boy! 488 00:23:47.687 --> 00:23:49.950 We're about to make this office great again. 489 00:23:50.124 --> 00:23:51.212 Nigga... 490 00:23:51.821 --> 00:23:53.997 White people have been playing dirty for... 491 00:23:55.608 --> 00:23:57.218 Well, literally for fucking ever. 492 00:23:57.392 --> 00:23:59.525 And that's why they have power everywhere. 493 00:23:59.699 --> 00:24:01.831 Why do you think they're not in power anywhere? 494 00:24:02.397 --> 00:24:04.921 Cheating and crying only gets you so far. 495 00:24:05.487 --> 00:24:07.663 -But before he can steal from you... -We need to... 496 00:24:07.837 --> 00:24:09.926 ...sabotage him and get you back in the hunt. 497 00:24:10.100 --> 00:24:11.537 -Huh? -You want to save... 498 00:24:11.711 --> 00:24:12.973 ...your dad's house, right? 499 00:24:14.801 --> 00:24:16.585 -I don't know. -It doesn't seem right. 500 00:24:17.368 --> 00:24:20.371 -Right ain't going to... -...keep the kids in the center and off the streets, papa. 501 00:24:20.937 --> 00:24:24.158 Look, I'm not talking about killing the guy... 502 00:24:24.332 --> 00:24:25.812 ...unless you're ready to take it there, homie. 503 00:24:25.986 --> 00:24:27.378 -I don't-- -No. 504 00:24:27.944 --> 00:24:29.163 Just playing. 505 00:24:29.729 --> 00:24:32.427 We're just going to kill any equal opportunity bullshit. 506 00:24:32.601 --> 00:24:35.343 Little reparations for everything they did to our ancestors, dawg! 507 00:24:36.039 --> 00:24:38.477 -Whip cracking reform! -[drawer slams] 508 00:24:38.651 --> 00:24:41.392 Mental warfare, nigga! 509 00:24:41.567 --> 00:24:45.092 Storm the beaches of their cerebral cortezzz. 510 00:24:45.962 --> 00:24:47.921 We make him look bad at work... 511 00:24:48.095 --> 00:24:50.619 ...so you get another shot at the promotion, my G. 512 00:24:51.185 --> 00:24:52.403 For your Dad. 513 00:24:52.882 --> 00:24:55.929 Para los niños... 514 00:24:57.974 --> 00:24:58.801 Yeah. 515 00:25:01.108 --> 00:25:01.978 Okay. 516 00:25:03.937 --> 00:25:05.460 [engines rumble] 517 00:25:05.634 --> 00:25:09.508 [acoustic guitar strumming] 518 00:25:12.685 --> 00:25:14.774 [coins jangling] 519 00:25:15.992 --> 00:25:18.125 Hey, I'm not a starving artist. 520 00:25:18.299 --> 00:25:19.387 I'm just nibbly. 521 00:25:19.735 --> 00:25:21.345 [scoffs] Whatever, bro. 522 00:25:22.085 --> 00:25:23.957 [gentle guitar music] 523 00:25:26.220 --> 00:25:29.397 Bob! Peach bellini partini! 524 00:25:29.963 --> 00:25:32.139 -Uh, it's actually Tom. -But don't forget to tip, Bob. 525 00:25:32.313 --> 00:25:33.314 [clicks tongue] 526 00:25:35.708 --> 00:25:38.319 -Laurie? -It's Lainee. 527 00:25:38.493 --> 00:25:41.278 -Oh, it says Laurie on the cup. -Oh, "The cup says." 528 00:25:41.452 --> 00:25:44.020 -What does my birth certificate know? -I don't know. 529 00:25:45.935 --> 00:25:47.458 What the hell is this? 530 00:25:48.416 --> 00:25:50.810 [suspenseful music] 531 00:25:50.984 --> 00:25:51.898 [phone smashes] 532 00:25:52.072 --> 00:25:53.508 I'll tell you what it's not. 533 00:25:53.682 --> 00:25:55.249 It's not what my boss ordered! 534 00:25:55.815 --> 00:25:58.078 Tell me. I was gonna look at your name tag, 535 00:25:58.252 --> 00:26:01.124 but your identity isn't worth a single second of my life. 536 00:26:01.298 --> 00:26:02.865 I'm just gonna call you, "Guy." 537 00:26:03.039 --> 00:26:04.171 Got it, guy? 538 00:26:05.694 --> 00:26:07.522 -Guy, do you hate me? -No... 539 00:26:07.696 --> 00:26:10.307 -[both laugh] -Guy, do you want me to lose my internship? 540 00:26:10.481 --> 00:26:14.311 Huh? Drop out of college. Inevitably end up with a crippling meth addiction. 541 00:26:14.877 --> 00:26:16.531 That pushes me into selling this sweet ass 542 00:26:16.705 --> 00:26:18.881 in some bottom-feeding corner in a redneck trailer park, 543 00:26:19.055 --> 00:26:22.798 where drugs will end my precious little life, before I even drive a car, 544 00:26:22.972 --> 00:26:25.018 or worse, kiss a boy for the first time! 545 00:26:25.192 --> 00:26:26.802 Is that you want, guy? 546 00:26:27.498 --> 00:26:30.110 Then make me the single shot, double drip, cream-dream supreme 547 00:26:30.284 --> 00:26:32.678 with a triple pump, sugar free, fructose blend, 548 00:26:32.852 --> 00:26:34.767 one half almond, one half lactose cream, 549 00:26:34.941 --> 00:26:37.247 93 degree caramel macchiato, that I ordered! 550 00:26:37.421 --> 00:26:39.075 [dishes clattering] 551 00:26:40.250 --> 00:26:42.731 [intense music] 552 00:26:42.905 --> 00:26:44.037 [steamer whirs] 553 00:26:48.650 --> 00:26:49.869 Do you want whip on that? 554 00:26:52.785 --> 00:26:55.178 -[whistling] -[sharp thud] 555 00:26:57.224 --> 00:26:59.182 [robber] Not going to stop this, big boy. 556 00:26:59.487 --> 00:27:02.621 Alright, everybody. Get your hippy bracelet hands in the air now. 557 00:27:02.795 --> 00:27:05.493 I mean, get on the ground! 558 00:27:06.146 --> 00:27:07.060 Now! 559 00:27:10.019 --> 00:27:13.588 [western style music] 560 00:27:25.905 --> 00:27:26.775 [stapler clicks] 561 00:27:28.255 --> 00:27:29.560 [tape dispenser clicks] 562 00:27:48.623 --> 00:27:50.233 Nice doing business with you, Mr. Zangang. 563 00:27:50.407 --> 00:27:51.670 I'll see you tomorrow, at eight, okay? 564 00:27:51.844 --> 00:27:52.975 [chuckles] All right. 565 00:27:55.325 --> 00:27:57.501 What the fuck? The fuck wrong with this phone, man? 566 00:27:57.676 --> 00:27:59.286 Get the fuck off my ear, man! 567 00:27:59.939 --> 00:28:01.984 Hey, man! Hey, hey, hey! 568 00:28:02.376 --> 00:28:04.247 Hey-- Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Not you, Mr. Zangang! 569 00:28:04.421 --> 00:28:06.772 Oh, you still on the phone? [chuckles] 570 00:28:06.946 --> 00:28:09.165 I didn't mean that shit, you know what I'm saying? I ju-- 571 00:28:09.339 --> 00:28:11.298 Did I say "shit"? I'm sorry, Mr. Zan-- 572 00:28:11.472 --> 00:28:14.388 Uh, yeah. It's just, you know, with a little more-- 573 00:28:14.562 --> 00:28:17.130 just a little business that I got to attend to. 574 00:28:17.783 --> 00:28:20.394 It's all good, Mr. Zan-- how about you hang up first? 575 00:28:20.960 --> 00:28:22.265 ♪ I don't trust no hoe ♪ 576 00:28:22.439 --> 00:28:23.702 ♪ I don't be trusting a hoe ♪ 577 00:28:23.876 --> 00:28:25.486 ♪ I don't be trusting a hoe ♪ 578 00:28:25.660 --> 00:28:26.966 ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ 579 00:28:27.444 --> 00:28:30.273 ["No Love" by XUAVE] 580 00:29:26.242 --> 00:29:29.637 ["No Love" by XUAVE continues] 581 00:29:34.294 --> 00:29:35.991 [electric buzzing] 582 00:29:36.949 --> 00:29:38.428 [music fades] 583 00:29:38.602 --> 00:29:39.995 [electric buzzing] 584 00:29:40.909 --> 00:29:43.477 [whimsical music] 585 00:29:50.658 --> 00:29:51.702 [whooshing] 586 00:29:54.488 --> 00:29:57.230 [heavy metal music] 587 00:30:05.629 --> 00:30:07.980 [music fades] 588 00:30:10.156 --> 00:30:11.810 Tyrone! 589 00:30:13.072 --> 00:30:14.377 What's up, my nigga? 590 00:30:14.987 --> 00:30:15.814 Nothing. 591 00:30:20.470 --> 00:30:21.471 You see that? 592 00:30:22.211 --> 00:30:24.692 Did you see that? 593 00:30:26.172 --> 00:30:28.348 I was playing it cool. You dig? 594 00:30:28.696 --> 00:30:30.437 Wasn't even trying to jive, my man! 595 00:30:31.003 --> 00:30:33.788 But racially insensitive words... 596 00:30:33.962 --> 00:30:37.183 "Insensitive words," write it down now! 597 00:30:38.010 --> 00:30:42.579 No matter what tone, make people uncomfortable. 598 00:30:43.929 --> 00:30:47.671 Makes them disengage and feel isolated. 599 00:30:49.978 --> 00:30:53.634 Tyrone immediately retreated to Twitter, 600 00:30:54.461 --> 00:30:55.723 begging for a hug. 601 00:30:57.072 --> 00:31:01.207 Probably tormented with thoughts of his grandparents 602 00:31:01.381 --> 00:31:03.426 being whipped on the plantation! 603 00:31:03.600 --> 00:31:05.167 Or of his pops... 604 00:31:05.733 --> 00:31:07.735 running out on his crackhead Mom, 605 00:31:08.605 --> 00:31:11.695 only to be shot by some honky-tonk cop! 606 00:31:12.566 --> 00:31:15.786 -All lives matter, Tim? -[glass smashes] 607 00:31:15.961 --> 00:31:19.225 My parents are with my grandparents, on a cruise in the Bahamas. 608 00:31:20.269 --> 00:31:23.577 [sighs] Slave ship genetics? I get it. 609 00:31:25.579 --> 00:31:29.888 And that's why there's no room for racist, 610 00:31:30.062 --> 00:31:32.412 -bigoted stereotyping... -[phone chimes] 611 00:31:33.065 --> 00:31:34.718 ...comments or jokes. 612 00:31:34.893 --> 00:31:36.111 [Juan chuckles] 613 00:31:37.547 --> 00:31:40.115 Oh... [stutters] Excuse me, homes. 614 00:31:40.289 --> 00:31:42.465 You got a problem, Juan? 615 00:31:42.639 --> 00:31:44.772 Because unless you Juan't one, 616 00:31:44.946 --> 00:31:46.817 you better tell me what the fuck is up! 617 00:31:47.296 --> 00:31:49.168 Nothing, man. It's just my little brother. 618 00:31:49.342 --> 00:31:51.170 He's just talking shit, because he won his science fair 619 00:31:51.344 --> 00:31:53.172 I won, like, seven years ago. 620 00:31:53.346 --> 00:31:55.174 [laughter] 621 00:31:55.348 --> 00:31:57.741 [laughing sarcastically] Science fairs... 622 00:31:59.613 --> 00:32:02.224 Science fairs in Mexico? 623 00:32:02.703 --> 00:32:05.575 What kind of pinche gringo do you take me for? 624 00:32:05.749 --> 00:32:08.448 [tense techno music] 625 00:32:08.622 --> 00:32:12.060 These motherfuckers really think they're resilient. 626 00:32:13.453 --> 00:32:16.325 Okay. Time to step the fuck up. 627 00:32:16.891 --> 00:32:20.286 I don't know. I'm getting some real guilty vibes. 628 00:32:20.460 --> 00:32:23.071 I saw Malcolm X flipping me off before I passed out. 629 00:32:23.245 --> 00:32:26.814 -I think we should just drop it. -Drop it? 630 00:32:26.988 --> 00:32:28.816 [scoffs] You just want to drop it? 631 00:32:30.383 --> 00:32:32.211 Did your father just drop the hammer, 632 00:32:32.385 --> 00:32:34.256 when he built a house for his family to live in? 633 00:32:35.083 --> 00:32:37.694 Huh? Now you just don't care. 634 00:32:38.260 --> 00:32:40.306 What? No, I... 635 00:32:41.176 --> 00:32:45.224 think I'm just gonna go to Ami and tell her I was nervous. 636 00:32:46.747 --> 00:32:48.053 Ask for a second chance. 637 00:32:48.227 --> 00:32:49.663 [chuckles and slaps] 638 00:32:50.272 --> 00:32:51.578 Young Dylan, 639 00:32:52.274 --> 00:32:55.495 -you just don't get it. -[whimpers] Ow! 640 00:32:55.669 --> 00:32:57.540 You don't get second shots. 641 00:32:57.714 --> 00:33:00.152 Only those freeloading, half-assed minorities, 642 00:33:00.326 --> 00:33:02.110 who ride the wave of equal opportunity 643 00:33:02.284 --> 00:33:03.372 to get what they want. 644 00:33:04.983 --> 00:33:08.247 So, here's what we're gonna do. 645 00:33:10.075 --> 00:33:13.382 I don't know, bro. Just seems like I should ask Ami for another shot. 646 00:33:13.556 --> 00:33:16.168 All this racial focus is starting to backfire. 647 00:33:16.342 --> 00:33:19.562 Bro, the KKK was in the bathroom earlier. 648 00:33:20.694 --> 00:33:24.828 Exactly, bro. Ex-fucking-actly! 649 00:33:25.003 --> 00:33:27.657 These White motherfuckers still think they can tell us where to shit, 650 00:33:27.831 --> 00:33:29.964 where to eat, how to vote. 651 00:33:30.138 --> 00:33:33.402 Well, today, the whip cracks back. Wha-pssh! 652 00:33:34.490 --> 00:33:37.102 But if I get a second shot and I crush it, it won't matter. 653 00:33:37.276 --> 00:33:40.409 "Won't matter?" "It won't matter?" 654 00:33:40.583 --> 00:33:42.933 [laughs hysterically] 655 00:33:45.110 --> 00:33:47.199 Ha! "Won't matter?" 656 00:33:47.590 --> 00:33:49.766 White people are fucking evil, bro. 657 00:33:50.245 --> 00:33:53.379 Do you think they let the slaves go when they were crushing it in the field? 658 00:33:53.553 --> 00:33:55.511 Do you think they let Martin Luther King live, 659 00:33:55.685 --> 00:33:58.253 when he was crushing it with non-violence? 660 00:33:58.427 --> 00:33:59.950 The only thing they're fucking crushing, 661 00:34:00.125 --> 00:34:02.605 is our opportunity in this country, papa! 662 00:34:03.563 --> 00:34:05.173 I get it, but sometimes hard work 663 00:34:05.347 --> 00:34:07.567 -can really pay off, you just gotta-- -[chuckles] 664 00:34:07.741 --> 00:34:09.351 The ironing. 665 00:34:09.917 --> 00:34:11.658 Wait, do you mean irony? 666 00:34:12.746 --> 00:34:14.617 No wonder you fucking tanked the interview. 667 00:34:15.009 --> 00:34:19.318 Oh, the ironing. Like trying to smooth out a wrinkle situation. 668 00:34:19.492 --> 00:34:22.060 Pshhh! 669 00:34:22.625 --> 00:34:25.672 "The irony." Nobody "ironies" their clothes. 670 00:34:26.063 --> 00:34:26.976 Pshh! 671 00:34:27.761 --> 00:34:28.891 Dumb ass. 672 00:34:29.893 --> 00:34:31.112 [chews loudly] 673 00:34:32.983 --> 00:34:36.639 [suspenseful music] 674 00:34:38.946 --> 00:34:42.254 [Harry] "Laurie, I know you're a hard worker. Maybe too hard. 675 00:34:42.688 --> 00:34:44.908 The company decided to go into a new direction." 676 00:34:45.431 --> 00:34:47.085 [grunts] No. 677 00:34:48.695 --> 00:34:51.524 "This part of the job is always a struggle. 678 00:34:51.958 --> 00:34:55.310 It's never easy to fire someone, especially when that someone 679 00:34:55.484 --> 00:34:57.791 is the someone I'm talking to." Ugh! 680 00:34:59.445 --> 00:35:01.664 "Laurie. You gots to go, bitch!" 681 00:35:02.404 --> 00:35:03.318 [sighs] Yeah. 682 00:35:03.971 --> 00:35:05.190 -Laurie... -Yes? 683 00:35:06.365 --> 00:35:07.757 Hey, I-- 684 00:35:08.584 --> 00:35:09.759 I just, um... 685 00:35:10.847 --> 00:35:12.284 Right? [chuckles] 686 00:35:12.458 --> 00:35:15.983 What? So sad about Will, huh? 687 00:35:16.723 --> 00:35:20.901 Who knew that part of the body could bend that much? 688 00:35:21.380 --> 00:35:24.470 [suspenseful music] 689 00:35:25.645 --> 00:35:26.472 Harry? 690 00:35:28.038 --> 00:35:29.866 [water splattering] 691 00:35:34.175 --> 00:35:38.310 [emotional uplifting music] 692 00:35:38.484 --> 00:35:41.008 ♪ I'm a man ♪ 693 00:35:41.182 --> 00:35:43.358 ♪ Created fire with our hands ♪ 694 00:35:43.532 --> 00:35:46.013 ♪ I'm a man ♪ 695 00:35:46.187 --> 00:35:48.407 ♪ Stole and pillaged many lands ♪ 696 00:35:48.581 --> 00:35:51.323 ♪ I'm a man ♪ 697 00:35:51.497 --> 00:35:53.455 ♪ When I pee, I stand ♪ 698 00:35:53.629 --> 00:35:55.762 ♪ I'm a man, yes, I am♪ 699 00:35:55.936 --> 00:35:59.157 ♪ Yes, I am, I'm a man♪ 700 00:35:59.331 --> 00:36:01.898 ♪ Eve took the first bite Adam still stood beside her ♪ 701 00:36:02.072 --> 00:36:03.900 ♪ Y'all fight for equal rights but call us to kill a spider?♪ 702 00:36:04.074 --> 00:36:06.164 ♪ You think childbirth is hard? We put a man on the moon ♪ 703 00:36:06.338 --> 00:36:09.079 ♪ I'd have like 20 kids a year if you gave me a womb ♪ 704 00:36:09.254 --> 00:36:11.473 ♪ So listen up, huh? Here's how it's going down ♪ 705 00:36:11.647 --> 00:36:13.693 ♪ Laurie, you're fired get the fuck outta town ♪ 706 00:36:13.867 --> 00:36:16.522 ♪ Oh wait, what? You don't know who I am? ♪ 707 00:36:16.696 --> 00:36:18.741 ♪ Trick, looky here I'm a man, I'm a man ♪ 708 00:36:18.915 --> 00:36:25.922 ♪ I'm a maaaaaaaaaaan...♪ 709 00:36:27.924 --> 00:36:32.407 ♪ I'm a man♪ 710 00:36:33.930 --> 00:36:35.323 I'm a man. 711 00:36:39.588 --> 00:36:42.852 [laughter] 712 00:36:43.766 --> 00:36:45.203 Men, right? 713 00:36:45.377 --> 00:36:47.335 According to the sign on the door. 714 00:36:47.509 --> 00:36:51.557 -[laughter] -Yes, yes. Yes! 715 00:36:51.861 --> 00:36:54.777 -Nigga, what the fuck? -What the fuck? N' sync n' shit. 716 00:36:54.951 --> 00:36:57.084 [both sing] ♪ Bye, bye, bye! ♪ 717 00:36:57.650 --> 00:37:00.087 [robber] Let's keep this real nice and easy, everybody. 718 00:37:01.219 --> 00:37:04.265 Guitar man, play me some robbery music. 719 00:37:05.527 --> 00:37:07.007 Come on! 720 00:37:07.790 --> 00:37:09.792 We're gonna take him down. Man up! 721 00:37:09.966 --> 00:37:12.360 Actually, I've been considering a sex change for the past two minutes. 722 00:37:12.534 --> 00:37:14.493 Our insurance place are surprisingly flexible and-- 723 00:37:14.667 --> 00:37:16.973 I'm gonna give you a Tijuana sex change if you don't shut it. 724 00:37:17.147 --> 00:37:18.671 You distract him, I'll disarm him. 725 00:37:18.845 --> 00:37:20.238 Don't freeze. 726 00:37:20.412 --> 00:37:22.370 -[robber] Not the cheap stuff. -[dull thud] 727 00:37:24.459 --> 00:37:26.679 -Who are you? -It ain't Laurie, motherfucker. 728 00:37:26.853 --> 00:37:28.637 [keyboard clicking] 729 00:37:30.030 --> 00:37:32.554 [uptempo techno music] 730 00:37:39.648 --> 00:37:40.649 [groans softly] 731 00:37:43.826 --> 00:37:46.264 [winces] 732 00:37:47.526 --> 00:37:49.092 [winces] 733 00:37:49.267 --> 00:37:51.007 Shit! 734 00:37:53.009 --> 00:37:55.534 -Please, please, don't go, please. -[squelching] 735 00:37:56.883 --> 00:38:00.016 Oh, fuck! Ooh, it's on the tip. 736 00:38:00.843 --> 00:38:03.411 Oh, that's poo poo water. That's diarrhea, baby. 737 00:38:03.585 --> 00:38:05.370 Oh, God help me, please! 738 00:38:05.848 --> 00:38:09.374 -Oh, man. Miles, thank God. -I'm sorry, Shayne. I really gotta go. 739 00:38:09.548 --> 00:38:11.201 Don't laugh, but my shoe got stuck. 740 00:38:11.376 --> 00:38:13.247 We have midday presentations in like, ten minutes. 741 00:38:13.421 --> 00:38:14.988 -I have to go-- I have to go to the bathroom. -Please, please. 742 00:38:15.162 --> 00:38:16.250 [sighs] 743 00:38:18.208 --> 00:38:19.862 -There you go. -And there you go! 744 00:38:20.036 --> 00:38:21.603 What? Oh, my G-- 745 00:38:24.867 --> 00:38:27.609 -Shayne! Shayne! -[handle rattles] 746 00:38:28.218 --> 00:38:30.177 -[loud banging] -I'm trying! 747 00:38:31.178 --> 00:38:33.093 -I think it's stuck! -Come on, Shayne! 748 00:38:33.963 --> 00:38:35.617 Miles, it is stuck! 749 00:38:35.791 --> 00:38:37.445 Stop embarrassing yourself! 750 00:38:39.926 --> 00:38:41.275 [inhales sharply] 751 00:38:41.449 --> 00:38:42.798 Damn it, Shayne! 752 00:38:42.972 --> 00:38:44.800 [groaning] 753 00:38:50.328 --> 00:38:51.764 [groans] 754 00:38:57.204 --> 00:38:58.510 [panting] 755 00:38:58.684 --> 00:38:59.598 [farts loudly] 756 00:38:59.772 --> 00:39:00.729 [groans] 757 00:39:01.817 --> 00:39:03.515 Look... [inhales sharply] 758 00:39:03.689 --> 00:39:05.734 You're a professional trapped in a stairwell. 759 00:39:05.908 --> 00:39:09.999 [groans] It's not like you jumped on some-- nigga, shit! 760 00:39:10.173 --> 00:39:12.828 And opted for a stairwell over a legit bathroom. 761 00:39:13.829 --> 00:39:16.354 You'll get Sanj to clean it up. That's it. 762 00:39:16.528 --> 00:39:18.704 It's not like the stairs are up for a promotion, my nigga. 763 00:39:18.878 --> 00:39:20.445 Oh! 764 00:39:21.663 --> 00:39:24.797 -Woo! Woo! -[poop squelches] 765 00:39:24.971 --> 00:39:26.407 -[groans] -[poop squelches] 766 00:39:28.627 --> 00:39:31.543 Fuck you, shayne! 767 00:39:32.108 --> 00:39:34.154 [panting] 768 00:39:35.721 --> 00:39:36.722 Shit. 769 00:39:41.683 --> 00:39:43.685 -Where you been at, bro? Middays! -I know-- 770 00:39:43.859 --> 00:39:46.601 -Oh, let me grab my-- -Thumb drive! Let's go. 771 00:39:46.775 --> 00:39:50.344 ["West Coast Thang" by Nipsey Hussle feat. KrsTQ & Ill Will] 772 00:39:59.266 --> 00:40:02.051 -Bitch, I need a job! -[giggles] 773 00:40:02.225 --> 00:40:04.576 [both giggle] 774 00:40:05.141 --> 00:40:06.534 -Oi! -How are you? 775 00:40:06.708 --> 00:40:09.232 Mira, bien y tú? Mira, muy bonito. 776 00:40:09.407 --> 00:40:12.758 ♪ María, María ♪ 777 00:40:14.542 --> 00:40:17.763 ♪ She reminds me of a West Side... ♪ 778 00:40:17.937 --> 00:40:19.460 [sniffs] 779 00:40:19.634 --> 00:40:22.332 ♪ ...Story ♪ 780 00:40:24.857 --> 00:40:28.426 So this is the infamous Juan Guapo Hungrod Martinez? 781 00:40:29.165 --> 00:40:31.429 -[grunts] -No way. 782 00:40:31.994 --> 00:40:34.562 -Sí way. -Hmm... 783 00:40:34.736 --> 00:40:37.347 [Latin music] 784 00:40:37.522 --> 00:40:39.741 You don't look totally Latino. 785 00:40:39.915 --> 00:40:42.875 -You mixed with something? -Maybe a little agave, jalapeño... 786 00:40:43.049 --> 00:40:47.532 But other than that... todo Guadalajara. 787 00:40:50.709 --> 00:40:53.799 Okay, well, if you're a real Chicano, answer me this. 788 00:40:53.973 --> 00:40:56.279 -Where's the best place to party in TJ? -Hey, chica. 789 00:40:57.019 --> 00:40:58.586 -I'm gonna stop you right there. -Oh... 790 00:40:58.760 --> 00:41:01.459 Only gringos go to TJ to party. 791 00:41:04.897 --> 00:41:07.116 Okay, let's get real then. 792 00:41:07.465 --> 00:41:09.379 You're planning the guest list for your niece's quinceañera. 793 00:41:09.554 --> 00:41:11.686 Which of the family members get reserved parking? 794 00:41:16.691 --> 00:41:18.171 Backyard or event hall? 795 00:41:18.911 --> 00:41:19.955 Backyard. 796 00:41:22.871 --> 00:41:24.917 -Well? -Nobody. 797 00:41:25.091 --> 00:41:26.571 They all park on the grass. 798 00:41:29.443 --> 00:41:32.054 Well, okay. I guess you really are el jefe. 799 00:41:32.228 --> 00:41:34.143 [chuckles] I told you! 800 00:41:35.971 --> 00:41:37.582 So listen up, mm-kay? 801 00:41:38.234 --> 00:41:39.540 I'm gonna need a volunteer. 802 00:41:40.715 --> 00:41:43.065 Uh, um, uh... 803 00:41:43.239 --> 00:41:45.154 Nanette! Okay. 804 00:41:45.328 --> 00:41:47.156 Why not? Sure, come on up. 805 00:41:49.942 --> 00:41:53.859 [sensual music] 806 00:42:05.305 --> 00:42:07.350 Yeah. Oh, jeez-- 807 00:42:07.960 --> 00:42:09.265 Oh... [chuckles] 808 00:42:10.005 --> 00:42:13.879 [sneezes] So, additional to racism, 809 00:42:14.053 --> 00:42:19.449 there's, uh, sexual and religious her ass... 810 00:42:20.102 --> 00:42:22.061 Her ass-- Harassment! 811 00:42:22.235 --> 00:42:23.323 Harassment! 812 00:42:24.759 --> 00:42:27.762 And obviously, I didn't call Nanette up here to read 813 00:42:27.936 --> 00:42:29.372 The Bible.Am I right? 814 00:42:30.722 --> 00:42:31.810 Good. 815 00:42:32.375 --> 00:42:33.246 Can we speed this up? 816 00:42:34.116 --> 00:42:34.943 Yeah... 817 00:42:35.770 --> 00:42:37.946 So, we all watch sports, right? 818 00:42:38.512 --> 00:42:42.821 What do all the teammates say when someone does a good job? 819 00:42:43.517 --> 00:42:45.301 -Good job. -Right! 820 00:42:45.954 --> 00:42:48.000 Righty-o. Natural athlete. 821 00:42:48.174 --> 00:42:49.567 Three pointer, Tyrone! 822 00:42:50.872 --> 00:42:54.180 And they always follow up with a little gesture... 823 00:42:55.485 --> 00:42:57.923 just to solidify the compliment. 824 00:42:59.359 --> 00:43:01.666 [slaps and moans] Hey, Nannette, 825 00:43:01.840 --> 00:43:04.756 good job on unclogging that printer jam. 826 00:43:05.844 --> 00:43:08.760 -[slaps and moans] Hey, Nanette. -[Juan] Did he just-- was that a slap? 827 00:43:08.934 --> 00:43:11.414 Great job on that presentation today. 828 00:43:14.635 --> 00:43:15.984 You see what's happening here? 829 00:43:16.811 --> 00:43:17.769 We're a team! 830 00:43:19.074 --> 00:43:21.207 Just like any sport, yes? 831 00:43:21.903 --> 00:43:24.689 Sure, our arena is a little different, but... 832 00:43:25.254 --> 00:43:27.300 are we still not trying to win it all? 833 00:43:28.344 --> 00:43:30.433 So, that's why there's nothing wrong... 834 00:43:31.043 --> 00:43:33.741 with cheering your teammates on. 835 00:43:35.177 --> 00:43:36.004 Hey, Nannette. 836 00:43:37.832 --> 00:43:41.357 Marksman-like accuracy on that calendar invite. 837 00:43:41.531 --> 00:43:43.925 -[sighs] Oh... -[sharp thud] 838 00:43:44.099 --> 00:43:45.405 [men] Oh shit! 839 00:43:45.579 --> 00:43:47.450 -[Juan] Oh shit! -[Brendan grunts] Oh! 840 00:43:48.843 --> 00:43:51.759 Right here. If we expand our target audience, 841 00:43:51.933 --> 00:43:54.675 we could see a 45% jump 842 00:43:54.849 --> 00:43:56.764 in overall revenue for that sector. 843 00:43:58.026 --> 00:44:00.463 -[Lady Fiya] Oh... -[gasps] 844 00:44:00.638 --> 00:44:03.379 -Lady Fiya, we're going to cool you off. -Uh... This isn't mine. 845 00:44:03.553 --> 00:44:05.120 Kind of hard to cool off a... hot girl! 846 00:44:05.294 --> 00:44:07.949 -Uh... [chuckles nervously] -[rock music plays on TV] 847 00:44:08.123 --> 00:44:10.517 -Uh, uh... [chuckles nervously] -What's wrong, boys? 848 00:44:10.691 --> 00:44:12.824 -Too much ass-phyxiation? -Uh... 849 00:44:19.004 --> 00:44:21.528 [sniffs] Smell like shit. 850 00:44:24.487 --> 00:44:27.055 ♪ Roll, roll, roll your blunt ♪ 851 00:44:27.229 --> 00:44:29.231 ♪ Then you let it steam ♪ 852 00:44:29.579 --> 00:44:31.712 ♪ Pass it over to your friend ♪ 853 00:44:33.061 --> 00:44:34.715 Oh, hell, no. They ain't getting none of this. 854 00:44:35.324 --> 00:44:36.238 Mm. 855 00:44:37.805 --> 00:44:41.026 -[dull thuds] -[all] Damn! Damn! 856 00:44:41.200 --> 00:44:45.508 Here's one! When is it acceptable to touch a co-worker's privates? 857 00:44:45.857 --> 00:44:48.773 When your shoe is turning his baby nuts into Gerbers! 858 00:44:49.121 --> 00:44:52.124 -[dull thuds] -[man 1] Oh, damn son! 859 00:44:52.298 --> 00:44:55.170 -[indistinct yelling] -[man 2] I told your ass! I told-- 860 00:44:55.344 --> 00:44:57.216 -Drink more protein! -[man 1] Woo! 861 00:44:58.260 --> 00:44:59.174 [Tyrone] Dang! 862 00:45:00.001 --> 00:45:01.002 Tim... 863 00:45:02.830 --> 00:45:03.701 [sighs] 864 00:45:06.573 --> 00:45:07.487 He did it. 865 00:45:09.097 --> 00:45:11.621 When I left my office, he fucking did it! 866 00:45:11.796 --> 00:45:13.188 What are you talking about? 867 00:45:13.798 --> 00:45:16.104 -Besides, I'm more of a MILF chaser. -[laughs hysterically] 868 00:45:16.278 --> 00:45:20.282 Great! One of my candidates is a porn junkie, 869 00:45:20.456 --> 00:45:22.676 and the other is on CP time. 870 00:45:22.850 --> 00:45:26.332 -She did it! She trapped me in the stairwell! -Moi? 871 00:45:26.680 --> 00:45:29.161 Hey, guys. I'm sure that a virus just attached itself 872 00:45:29.335 --> 00:45:31.163 to Dylan's presentation, and those stairwell doors, 873 00:45:31.337 --> 00:45:34.253 -they get jammed all the time. We just need to fix them. -Enough! 874 00:45:34.427 --> 00:45:36.298 -[both] But he did it! -[phone buzzes] 875 00:45:36.864 --> 00:45:38.213 Hey, Jim! 876 00:45:39.301 --> 00:45:41.303 My dad's cabin? Right now? 877 00:45:41.477 --> 00:45:44.219 Sure, no problem. I'll send you the code. 878 00:45:45.394 --> 00:45:46.961 Will's replacement... 879 00:45:48.006 --> 00:45:49.921 The guys I told you about that-- 880 00:45:52.532 --> 00:45:54.316 Sure. I'll send them. 881 00:45:56.362 --> 00:46:00.018 And if they screw up, they're done all together. 882 00:46:01.323 --> 00:46:03.064 [water rushes] 883 00:46:04.892 --> 00:46:07.547 Um, sorry about that, earlier, Laurie. 884 00:46:08.417 --> 00:46:09.288 I'm a man. 885 00:46:09.636 --> 00:46:12.900 [laughs hysterically] 886 00:46:13.074 --> 00:46:16.643 And as such, there are certain responsibilities 887 00:46:16.817 --> 00:46:18.645 that a man such as myself, 888 00:46:18.819 --> 00:46:21.822 in a position such as mine must take. 889 00:46:22.257 --> 00:46:24.085 Laurie, you've been with the company, 890 00:46:24.259 --> 00:46:25.826 what, nine years now? 891 00:46:26.261 --> 00:46:28.655 -And lately-- -Hold that thought, Harry. 892 00:46:28.829 --> 00:46:30.962 -Cramps. -[pen clatters] 893 00:46:31.527 --> 00:46:33.399 Uh, okay. Yeah, sure. 894 00:46:34.008 --> 00:46:36.315 -Sure, sure. -[loud thud] 895 00:46:37.664 --> 00:46:39.840 [exhales sharply] Halfway there. 896 00:46:40.449 --> 00:46:42.147 Not so bad. 897 00:46:42.625 --> 00:46:44.149 Whale dick... [blows raspberry] 898 00:46:44.976 --> 00:46:46.368 I'm a man. 899 00:46:46.847 --> 00:46:49.284 I will take that whale dick, shove it right in my mouth. 900 00:46:49.458 --> 00:46:52.113 and just... [fast gnawing] 901 00:46:53.071 --> 00:46:57.640 -[Laurie] Oh, my God. Harry, I'm pregnant. -[dramatic musical sting] 902 00:46:58.424 --> 00:47:02.297 -Fuck! -Yeah, that's normally how it works with, uh... 903 00:47:06.214 --> 00:47:08.738 [moaning] 904 00:47:08.913 --> 00:47:10.044 Aah! 905 00:47:10.218 --> 00:47:12.351 [gentle lullaby] 906 00:47:12.525 --> 00:47:14.483 -Congrat-- okay. -Hi! 907 00:47:14.657 --> 00:47:16.311 -Uh, be-- be right-- -Mama! 908 00:47:16.485 --> 00:47:19.358 He-he! Hi! 909 00:47:20.446 --> 00:47:22.013 [dramatic musical sting] 910 00:47:22.709 --> 00:47:24.015 [gasps] 911 00:47:25.843 --> 00:47:28.280 [frantic music] 912 00:47:28.454 --> 00:47:30.456 I'm a ma-- 913 00:47:31.065 --> 00:47:32.066 [dull thud] 914 00:47:33.328 --> 00:47:34.590 [birds chirping] 915 00:47:34.764 --> 00:47:36.375 Man, these fuckers are scandalous. 916 00:47:36.549 --> 00:47:38.116 This whole time, we were trying to get them, 917 00:47:38.290 --> 00:47:39.508 they were getting us. 918 00:47:39.682 --> 00:47:41.641 I was trying to be nice, but fuck that. 919 00:47:41.815 --> 00:47:44.035 We need to rip these motherfuckers' hearts out. 920 00:47:44.209 --> 00:47:46.820 Scandalous-ass White folks, always trying to hold somebody Black! 921 00:47:47.342 --> 00:47:49.344 Man, they wanted a nigga? A nigga here now! 922 00:47:49.518 --> 00:47:51.346 -[Lonzo] How here are you, bro? -Right here! 923 00:47:51.520 --> 00:47:55.133 Shady-ass Black people, always trying to get over. 924 00:47:55.611 --> 00:47:57.962 Okay, well, here come the colonizers. 925 00:47:58.136 --> 00:48:01.922 [Shayne] Now you're talking, daddy. Big Dick style. 926 00:48:02.096 --> 00:48:04.098 -[Lonzo] Are you sure you're ready, dawg? -What you got? 927 00:48:04.272 --> 00:48:05.883 Papi,let's just say, by the time 928 00:48:06.057 --> 00:48:07.841 you're getting cozy in your new office, 929 00:48:08.015 --> 00:48:11.105 a celly is going to be getting cozy in Dylan's ass. 930 00:48:11.845 --> 00:48:15.501 -How you gonna do that? -Wakanda forever! 931 00:48:16.371 --> 00:48:19.200 What is every Black man's kryptonite? 932 00:48:20.332 --> 00:48:22.900 Black and milds? Rims? 933 00:48:23.726 --> 00:48:26.947 -Gold chains? Uh, Timberlands? -Okay, okay. Ssh. 934 00:48:31.343 --> 00:48:34.694 Let's just hope Miles converts to prison ball sacks 935 00:48:34.868 --> 00:48:39.220 as easily as you do to your new tax bracket. 936 00:48:41.353 --> 00:48:43.311 -[lips pop] -I like it. 937 00:48:43.485 --> 00:48:44.443 Go. 938 00:48:44.791 --> 00:48:47.098 Go and take back our country! 939 00:48:51.841 --> 00:48:54.932 [suspenseful music] 940 00:48:57.499 --> 00:48:59.240 [birds chirping] 941 00:49:03.723 --> 00:49:04.593 [door shuts] 942 00:49:24.918 --> 00:49:27.486 Fuck! I already hate this fucking place. 943 00:49:30.576 --> 00:49:32.056 Cabin in the woods... 944 00:49:38.105 --> 00:49:40.325 -Damn it, man. No signal! -[chimes bell] 945 00:49:40.673 --> 00:49:42.066 [door creaks] 946 00:49:48.028 --> 00:49:50.248 [wood creaking] 947 00:49:54.643 --> 00:49:56.863 Shit. Out of my way, racist! 948 00:49:57.037 --> 00:49:58.778 -Your mom's a fucking racist. -What? 949 00:49:59.866 --> 00:50:01.911 -Oh, hi, guys. -Mandy? 950 00:50:03.565 --> 00:50:04.740 How'd you roll up here? 951 00:50:06.829 --> 00:50:08.831 Freeze, dirt turkeys! 952 00:50:09.310 --> 00:50:11.573 -Ready? -No. 953 00:50:12.313 --> 00:50:13.923 -Too bad! -Aw! 954 00:50:14.098 --> 00:50:15.055 -[robber] Ah! -[gunshot] 955 00:50:16.839 --> 00:50:18.276 [muffled thud] 956 00:50:19.407 --> 00:50:21.888 [ethereal melancholic music] 957 00:50:23.672 --> 00:50:25.544 I told you your name wasn't important. 958 00:50:25.718 --> 00:50:27.154 Rest easy, guy. 959 00:50:27.720 --> 00:50:28.634 Who is this asshole? 960 00:50:29.374 --> 00:50:32.203 He... was... guy! 961 00:50:32.377 --> 00:50:35.684 [grunting and spluttering] 962 00:50:35.858 --> 00:50:38.122 -That was my boss' drink! -[robber cries] 963 00:50:38.644 --> 00:50:39.949 [groans] 964 00:50:45.781 --> 00:50:46.652 Jim? 965 00:50:48.480 --> 00:50:50.525 -Mandy! Hey! -Hey! 966 00:50:51.352 --> 00:50:54.486 -[Jim] Ha-ha! -[Mandy giggles] 967 00:50:54.660 --> 00:50:56.009 -Hey, Jim. -Dylan Kirkpatrick, pleas-- 968 00:50:56.183 --> 00:50:57.750 I'm Miles Fuller, Ami said-- 969 00:50:57.924 --> 00:51:00.318 -As your account repre-- -Hey, I really want to tell-- 970 00:51:00.492 --> 00:51:02.450 Let's cut the crap, fellas. This here is real simple. 971 00:51:02.624 --> 00:51:04.452 -Let's rack... -[gun cocks] 972 00:51:04.626 --> 00:51:05.540 ...and track. 973 00:51:06.280 --> 00:51:07.890 Sorry, Jim. No signal! 974 00:51:08.065 --> 00:51:09.718 That's not the gear. 975 00:51:09.892 --> 00:51:12.373 [whimsical music] 976 00:51:15.420 --> 00:51:17.465 [loud gunshots] 977 00:51:17.639 --> 00:51:18.771 [sighs] 978 00:51:19.598 --> 00:51:20.816 Let's get one with nature. 979 00:51:23.819 --> 00:51:25.952 [birds chirping] 980 00:51:26.300 --> 00:51:27.954 We could have just turned them off. 981 00:51:38.182 --> 00:51:40.009 [phone rings] 982 00:51:40.967 --> 00:51:44.275 Okay, well, if you two are so lovey-dovey, let me see you kiss. 983 00:51:44.623 --> 00:51:45.624 Un beso. 984 00:51:48.888 --> 00:51:49.976 -Come on. -[chuckles nervously] 985 00:51:50.150 --> 00:51:53.675 [nervous laughter] 986 00:51:53.849 --> 00:51:55.677 [laughter continues] 987 00:51:57.201 --> 00:51:58.724 A-ha! 988 00:52:00.117 --> 00:52:01.988 [laughter] 989 00:52:03.120 --> 00:52:05.165 [smooching loudly] 990 00:52:06.514 --> 00:52:09.909 Sister, I've heard the most amazing things about you, 991 00:52:10.083 --> 00:52:12.041 yet words aren't even a starting point. 992 00:52:12.651 --> 00:52:15.132 -Your mustache is faker than your tongue! -[gasps] 993 00:52:15.306 --> 00:52:17.743 -[whimpers] Ew! -Y esto qué es?[gasps] 994 00:52:18.874 --> 00:52:20.093 Papiwould never forgive you. 995 00:52:20.267 --> 00:52:21.964 Not only did you fake love, you-- 996 00:52:22.139 --> 00:52:24.184 you faked a whole Mexican! 997 00:52:25.620 --> 00:52:27.187 [dramatic musical sting] 998 00:52:28.188 --> 00:52:31.017 [chuckles] I don't believe it. 999 00:52:31.539 --> 00:52:34.499 -You've got to be the biggest fraud in Latin culture. -[whimpers] 1000 00:52:35.064 --> 00:52:36.283 After Ariana Grande. 1001 00:52:37.719 --> 00:52:38.590 Hey! 1002 00:52:40.069 --> 00:52:41.593 That kiss wasn't fake. 1003 00:52:43.464 --> 00:52:44.552 -It wasn't? -It wasn't? 1004 00:52:45.074 --> 00:52:47.076 [upbeat pop music] 1005 00:52:47.425 --> 00:52:48.382 Did it feel fake to you? 1006 00:52:49.905 --> 00:52:53.170 N-- no, it felt really good. 1007 00:52:58.305 --> 00:52:59.393 [both giggle] 1008 00:53:06.139 --> 00:53:07.009 Qué? 1009 00:53:12.624 --> 00:53:14.103 You guys ever fired a gun? 1010 00:53:14.887 --> 00:53:16.193 -Call of Duty! -Call of Duty! 1011 00:53:16.367 --> 00:53:17.194 [loud gunshot] 1012 00:53:17.368 --> 00:53:18.238 [bird squawks] 1013 00:53:20.719 --> 00:53:22.808 I need someone with the instincts of a hunter 1014 00:53:22.982 --> 00:53:24.549 overseeing my account. 1015 00:53:25.114 --> 00:53:27.378 Kill or be killed. 1016 00:53:29.249 --> 00:53:30.119 It's real simple. 1017 00:53:31.512 --> 00:53:33.427 First person to kill something breathing 1018 00:53:33.601 --> 00:53:36.430 and get it back to the cabin, wins my account, but... 1019 00:53:37.257 --> 00:53:39.433 if I return first with the trophy, 1020 00:53:40.217 --> 00:53:42.349 I find a new company for my millions. 1021 00:53:42.523 --> 00:53:44.612 Yeah, I'm not really the "killy" type. 1022 00:53:44.917 --> 00:53:46.832 I was actually vegan, for a minute. 1023 00:53:49.008 --> 00:53:51.358 -[gun cocks] -Well, I'm not a little bitch, Jim. 1024 00:53:51.880 --> 00:53:54.318 -I'm game. -Wait, I thought Mandy was here to referee? 1025 00:53:54.709 --> 00:53:57.234 Oh, no. I asked Ami to send her. 1026 00:53:57.712 --> 00:54:01.150 -Me and Mandy go way back. She's great! -Fuck. 1027 00:54:01.977 --> 00:54:04.066 And once these loudmouths get the hell out of here 1028 00:54:04.241 --> 00:54:06.808 and stop scaring the wildlife with their whining, 1029 00:54:07.418 --> 00:54:09.985 I'm sure that a creature with a death wish will mosey on up! 1030 00:54:10.595 --> 00:54:12.161 That's the spirit, Mandy! 1031 00:54:13.162 --> 00:54:15.252 Hunting is 90% mental, 1032 00:54:15.817 --> 00:54:19.952 and we know Asians, when it comes to academics. 1033 00:54:20.648 --> 00:54:22.259 [birds chirping] 1034 00:54:22.911 --> 00:54:25.218 -Well, I never said I wouldn't. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1035 00:54:25.392 --> 00:54:26.872 I-- I'll totally bust a cap. 1036 00:54:27.438 --> 00:54:28.700 Let's get started! 1037 00:54:37.839 --> 00:54:38.666 What are you doing? 1038 00:54:39.754 --> 00:54:40.755 We're going with you... 1039 00:54:41.756 --> 00:54:42.583 to murder. 1040 00:54:44.063 --> 00:54:45.717 This isn't a circle jerk, buddy. 1041 00:54:46.326 --> 00:54:47.762 It's every man for himself. 1042 00:54:48.546 --> 00:54:51.157 But, we don't have GPS. 1043 00:54:53.072 --> 00:54:55.857 No phones, no cars, no tech. 1044 00:54:56.293 --> 00:54:58.686 It's just you, mother nature, 1045 00:54:59.121 --> 00:55:00.906 and whatever's on the kill-end of that rifle. 1046 00:55:01.994 --> 00:55:04.866 [sighs] You can follow the high peak back to the cabin. 1047 00:55:07.434 --> 00:55:09.218 What the fuck does that mean? 1048 00:55:10.611 --> 00:55:12.352 He just abandoned us and-- 1049 00:55:13.962 --> 00:55:17.226 ["The Best Day" by Bobby Cole] 1050 00:55:20.795 --> 00:55:21.883 Fuck my life. 1051 00:55:35.984 --> 00:55:41.512 ♪ Today is the best day ♪ 1052 00:55:41.686 --> 00:55:44.428 ♪ Of my life ♪ 1053 00:55:44.863 --> 00:55:48.127 ♪ And I'll sing it out a thousand times ♪ 1054 00:55:48.301 --> 00:55:53.437 ♪ Today is the best day ♪ 1055 00:55:53.872 --> 00:55:56.353 ♪ Of my life ♪ 1056 00:55:57.266 --> 00:55:58.485 [bubbling] 1057 00:55:58.659 --> 00:56:01.967 [western style music] 1058 00:56:02.881 --> 00:56:04.622 [whimpers] 1059 00:56:17.461 --> 00:56:19.027 -[Harry grunts] -[screams] 1060 00:56:19.201 --> 00:56:20.551 [grunting] 1061 00:56:20.725 --> 00:56:21.987 What the hell happened to you? 1062 00:56:22.640 --> 00:56:24.293 Civil rights. 1063 00:56:24.903 --> 00:56:25.991 You? 1064 00:56:26.861 --> 00:56:27.993 I think I fired Laurie. 1065 00:56:29.516 --> 00:56:33.607 -Oh, my God! [giggles] -So excited! I can't believe it! 1066 00:56:33.781 --> 00:56:35.914 -I'm so happy for you. -Thank you! 1067 00:56:36.305 --> 00:56:37.481 You sure about that? 1068 00:56:38.482 --> 00:56:40.919 Damn it. Okay, all right. 1069 00:56:41.093 --> 00:56:42.834 Think, Harry, think. 1070 00:56:46.446 --> 00:56:50.189 [singing] ♪ W-W-H-D ♪ 1071 00:56:51.625 --> 00:56:54.019 ♪ What would Harry do? ♪ 1072 00:56:54.933 --> 00:56:59.111 ♪ To keep it, Harry, true ♪ 1073 00:56:59.416 --> 00:57:00.242 [clears throat] 1074 00:57:01.156 --> 00:57:02.375 ♪ True... ♪ 1075 00:57:02.810 --> 00:57:03.637 [coughs] 1076 00:57:05.117 --> 00:57:07.598 -♪ Ooh-ahh-- ♪ -Oh, you're flat! 1077 00:57:08.642 --> 00:57:10.905 -It centers me, okay? -[groans] 1078 00:57:11.079 --> 00:57:13.212 What type of lawsuits did Laurie Loophole file? 1079 00:57:13.386 --> 00:57:15.997 Um, unlawful termination, 1080 00:57:16.171 --> 00:57:20.219 gender discrimination, reverse gender discrimination. 1081 00:57:20.393 --> 00:57:24.832 -What is that? -When they rehired her after the gender discrimination suit, 1082 00:57:25.442 --> 00:57:28.923 she filed another suit that said they wouldn't rehire a man. 1083 00:57:29.097 --> 00:57:30.969 She sued, because they rehired her? 1084 00:57:31.883 --> 00:57:35.843 She once sued that the splash of the toilet gave her herpes! 1085 00:57:36.017 --> 00:57:38.759 That's it! I'm just gonna go to Ami, 1086 00:57:38.933 --> 00:57:40.718 I'm-- I'm going to tell her, you know... 1087 00:57:42.589 --> 00:57:44.461 Something! Give me something, Brendan! 1088 00:57:44.635 --> 00:57:45.940 I don't know what to tell her! 1089 00:57:46.593 --> 00:57:48.813 That sounds like a you problem. 1090 00:57:48.987 --> 00:57:50.641 [laughs and splutters] 1091 00:57:50.815 --> 00:57:51.946 Ow, my face. 1092 00:57:54.645 --> 00:57:56.298 -What's up, man? -Hey. 1093 00:57:57.604 --> 00:58:00.520 -Dude, pecs are a little-- pecs are a little small, man. -Yeah? 1094 00:58:00.694 --> 00:58:03.958 Um, masturbate twice a day, boost the testosterone levels. 1095 00:58:04.132 --> 00:58:05.743 -All right? Catch you on the track, boy. -All right, cool. 1096 00:58:05.917 --> 00:58:08.093 -[Brent] Hey, hi! -Thank you, Brent! 1097 00:58:08.267 --> 00:58:11.444 [whimsical music] 1098 00:58:13.446 --> 00:58:16.362 [fridge rumbles] 1099 00:58:24.413 --> 00:58:25.371 Ugh! 1100 00:58:31.725 --> 00:58:33.335 [groaning] 1101 00:58:35.033 --> 00:58:37.470 -José? -Lainee? 1102 00:58:38.340 --> 00:58:40.255 Because if you are, you've got the wrong guy. 1103 00:58:40.429 --> 00:58:43.302 -I'm not José. -You called off today! 1104 00:58:43.476 --> 00:58:45.957 -I don't call off! -[Ant] You're not calling anybody! 1105 00:58:46.348 --> 00:58:47.567 [dull thud] 1106 00:58:48.481 --> 00:58:52.267 [ethereal music] 1107 00:58:59.927 --> 00:59:01.320 It's all right, little mama. 1108 00:59:01.625 --> 00:59:03.452 Even bosses have bad days. 1109 00:59:04.192 --> 00:59:04.976 [chuckles] 1110 00:59:09.589 --> 00:59:13.419 [uptempo techno music] 1111 00:59:15.726 --> 00:59:18.337 Damn! Chill! Wit' yo' overly aggressive-ass! 1112 00:59:18.511 --> 00:59:20.774 He's literally knocked the fuck out, Larry. 1113 00:59:21.209 --> 00:59:24.561 -Relax, NYPD. -Hey, hey. He was robbing the place. 1114 00:59:24.735 --> 00:59:26.432 Whatever happened to innocent until proven guilty? 1115 00:59:26.606 --> 00:59:29.087 This is one bad hombre. 1116 00:59:29.261 --> 00:59:31.219 Well, ain't this a whale's dick? 1117 00:59:31.872 --> 00:59:34.658 [spiritual folk music] 1118 00:59:38.575 --> 00:59:40.402 Oh-- oh, shit. 1119 00:59:40.707 --> 00:59:43.710 Oh, shit. Oh, oh! 1120 00:59:43.884 --> 00:59:46.713 Dick chafe! Dick chafe! Aah! 1121 00:59:50.151 --> 00:59:51.239 [Miles] Oh, I can't do this. 1122 00:59:52.284 --> 00:59:54.329 I mean, damn! Do I look African? 1123 00:59:54.678 --> 00:59:56.636 Did I put "tribesman" on my resume? 1124 00:59:56.810 --> 00:59:58.464 [sighs loudly] 1125 00:59:59.421 --> 01:00:00.379 [panting] 1126 01:00:02.555 --> 01:00:04.165 I'm not Man vs. Wild. 1127 01:00:04.775 --> 01:00:07.952 Oh, fuck... [panting] 1128 01:00:09.214 --> 01:00:11.825 My balls didn't drop until I was four! 1129 01:00:11.999 --> 01:00:13.827 [echoes] 1130 01:00:17.048 --> 01:00:20.747 [tense dramatic music] 1131 01:00:25.360 --> 01:00:27.798 [birds chirping] 1132 01:00:29.016 --> 01:00:30.801 -You... -You... 1133 01:00:30.975 --> 01:00:33.064 This is all your fault! 1134 01:00:34.587 --> 01:00:36.502 How convenient, man. 1135 01:00:36.676 --> 01:00:38.417 Even in the middle of nowhere, 1136 01:00:38.591 --> 01:00:40.375 you find a Black man to blame for your bullshit. 1137 01:00:40.549 --> 01:00:43.465 This isn't about Black or White. This whole stupid challenge 1138 01:00:43.640 --> 01:00:45.729 is because you and your buddy have been fucking with my chances. 1139 01:00:45.903 --> 01:00:47.208 What you say there, White privilege? 1140 01:00:47.382 --> 01:00:49.384 I was too busy shucking 1141 01:00:49.733 --> 01:00:51.865 and jiving, and getting fucked over, 1142 01:00:52.039 --> 01:00:54.302 by you and Susie side-chick, all fucking day. 1143 01:00:54.476 --> 01:00:56.435 I didn't do that because you're Black! 1144 01:00:57.001 --> 01:00:59.568 -But you did them. -You and la Raza did the same! 1145 01:01:00.178 --> 01:01:02.441 Always blame the White man when shit doesn't go your way? 1146 01:01:02.615 --> 01:01:04.486 Take responsibility for your failure. 1147 01:01:04.661 --> 01:01:07.185 Easy for you to say when you guys are always holding us back. 1148 01:01:07.359 --> 01:01:08.621 Name one time. 1149 01:01:11.972 --> 01:01:14.758 That's different, man. I didn't do that because you're Black, I-- 1150 01:01:15.802 --> 01:01:17.195 Man, I need this job! 1151 01:01:19.327 --> 01:01:21.373 I need this job to save my dad's house. 1152 01:01:22.722 --> 01:01:24.115 It's all I have left of him. 1153 01:01:26.204 --> 01:01:27.945 I would have fucked over anybody. 1154 01:01:28.772 --> 01:01:30.774 [chuckles] Lowkey, me too, man. 1155 01:01:30.948 --> 01:01:33.167 I mean, I would have voted Trump over Obama, 1156 01:01:33.341 --> 01:01:34.778 to help keep the center open. 1157 01:01:36.040 --> 01:01:37.389 I just wanted the kids in my hood, man, 1158 01:01:37.563 --> 01:01:39.130 to have an easier path than what I had. 1159 01:01:41.088 --> 01:01:43.003 I don't have anything against y'all White boys. 1160 01:01:43.177 --> 01:01:45.266 You signed the Emancipation Proclamation. 1161 01:01:45.440 --> 01:01:47.529 I still wouldn't have voted Trump over Obama. 1162 01:01:47.704 --> 01:01:49.967 [laughs] 1163 01:01:50.141 --> 01:01:51.359 Not that piece of shit. 1164 01:01:52.273 --> 01:01:55.450 Hey, it looks like Handy Mandy got a leg up now. 1165 01:01:55.624 --> 01:01:56.800 [both laugh] 1166 01:01:57.714 --> 01:01:59.367 -[dramatic musical sting] -[laughter] 1167 01:01:59.933 --> 01:02:02.675 Yeah, yeah. She'll be able to roll right in. 1168 01:02:02.849 --> 01:02:04.416 [both laugh] 1169 01:02:04.590 --> 01:02:06.897 -You got that right! -[gun cocks] 1170 01:02:07.375 --> 01:02:08.507 Mandy? 1171 01:02:08.681 --> 01:02:10.248 Why do your feet work? 1172 01:02:10.422 --> 01:02:12.293 Shut the fuck up, both of you. 1173 01:02:12.903 --> 01:02:14.469 Drop them, now. 1174 01:02:14.861 --> 01:02:16.863 [music intensifies] 1175 01:02:20.127 --> 01:02:21.738 Hey, Ami. You got a second? 1176 01:02:21.912 --> 01:02:23.435 For you? No. 1177 01:02:23.609 --> 01:02:25.654 Uh, okay. 1178 01:02:28.005 --> 01:02:30.442 [emotional uplifting music] 1179 01:02:33.184 --> 01:02:34.533 I'm a man. 1180 01:02:35.534 --> 01:02:38.711 You know what, Ami? Unless you want to lose a quarter million dollars, 1181 01:02:38.885 --> 01:02:40.539 I suggest you make a second. 1182 01:02:40.713 --> 01:02:42.976 No, fuck that! Make two seconds, 1183 01:02:43.150 --> 01:02:45.109 because in case you haven't been paying attention, 1184 01:02:45.283 --> 01:02:47.633 that's exactly what trying to "fire" 1185 01:02:47.807 --> 01:02:49.809 Laurie Loophole has cost you. 1186 01:02:51.942 --> 01:02:56.076 I did some research. She has cost you 260k in lawsuits, 1187 01:02:56.250 --> 01:02:58.078 and now she's saying she's pregnant, 1188 01:02:58.252 --> 01:02:59.993 which could easily double that amount, 1189 01:03:00.167 --> 01:03:02.126 if we don't have a solid game plan. 1190 01:03:02.953 --> 01:03:05.738 So, why exactly are we firing her? 1191 01:03:05.912 --> 01:03:09.133 -Performance? Attendance? -I don't like her. 1192 01:03:10.047 --> 01:03:13.050 Okay. What exactly has she done that you don't like? 1193 01:03:13.224 --> 01:03:14.616 Her perfume. 1194 01:03:15.313 --> 01:03:17.358 It's whore-ish. 1195 01:03:19.317 --> 01:03:21.362 Okay, not the most legal reason. 1196 01:03:21.536 --> 01:03:23.495 My company, my reason. 1197 01:03:24.061 --> 01:03:26.106 Damn it, Ami! If you're gonna fire me anyway, 1198 01:03:26.280 --> 01:03:27.934 then fuck it, fire her yourself. 1199 01:03:28.108 --> 01:03:30.589 And when you get hit with a multimillion dollar lawsuit-- 1200 01:03:30.763 --> 01:03:32.112 [slaps] 1201 01:03:32.286 --> 01:03:34.985 Move her to the back office. 1202 01:03:36.029 --> 01:03:39.903 I even catch a whiff of that bitch's scent, 1203 01:03:40.077 --> 01:03:42.383 and you're both fired. Got it? 1204 01:03:45.647 --> 01:03:48.520 You ever tell me "no" again, 1205 01:03:48.999 --> 01:03:51.828 it had better be over a billion dollars. 1206 01:03:54.004 --> 01:03:54.874 [slaps] 1207 01:03:58.312 --> 01:04:00.532 And cover your face. I don't want our clients 1208 01:04:00.706 --> 01:04:02.186 thinking we're having an outbreak. 1209 01:04:03.883 --> 01:04:06.364 Actually, Ami, this is who I am. 1210 01:04:06.538 --> 01:04:08.279 I'm a man, and-- 1211 01:04:11.412 --> 01:04:13.719 And I have a great beige remoulade 1212 01:04:13.893 --> 01:04:16.113 I have been waiting to try. 1213 01:04:19.159 --> 01:04:20.813 You know, I thought for sure that this position 1214 01:04:20.987 --> 01:04:22.597 was going to be mine, after I got rid of Will. 1215 01:04:23.555 --> 01:04:24.556 What? 1216 01:04:26.253 --> 01:04:29.735 -You killed Will? -With that "Look at me, I'm Mr. Nice Guy" 1217 01:04:29.909 --> 01:04:32.129 dipshit out of my way, my tracks covered, 1218 01:04:32.520 --> 01:04:34.174 I just thought that this job was gonna be mine. 1219 01:04:34.348 --> 01:04:35.872 -Mandy, this is crazy shit-- -No! 1220 01:04:36.481 --> 01:04:38.135 What's crazy is the fact that you think it's easy 1221 01:04:38.309 --> 01:04:40.833 rolling yourself around in a wheelchair for three years, 1222 01:04:41.007 --> 01:04:43.357 gaining sympathy, increasing likability, 1223 01:04:43.531 --> 01:04:45.838 all the while trying to plot how to off 1224 01:04:46.012 --> 01:04:47.535 the next person up on the food chain. 1225 01:04:47.709 --> 01:04:50.190 Oh, and by the way, it was a perfect plot. 1226 01:04:50.887 --> 01:04:51.931 You know... 1227 01:04:52.627 --> 01:04:54.194 Will probably deserved it, with-- 1228 01:04:54.499 --> 01:04:56.980 with all that "Ooh, look at me, I'm so helpful" crap. 1229 01:04:57.589 --> 01:04:58.677 Yuck! Right? 1230 01:04:59.330 --> 01:05:01.810 And I won't even hate on that primo handicapped 1231 01:05:01.985 --> 01:05:04.813 parking spot you've been milking, I mean, that's innovation! 1232 01:05:04.988 --> 01:05:07.338 -[applauds] -The promotion is yours. 1233 01:05:07.512 --> 01:05:10.689 -Take it. -Oh, yeah. I'm gonna take it. 1234 01:05:11.081 --> 01:05:15.433 You see, you guys, you helped me realize that between the entitled White man 1235 01:05:15.607 --> 01:05:18.653 and the equal opportunity Black man, that the Asian woman 1236 01:05:18.827 --> 01:05:22.353 is just going to have to take an "any means necessary" approach. 1237 01:05:23.702 --> 01:05:26.661 Oh, and Jim said to bring back something dead, right? 1238 01:05:27.271 --> 01:05:30.535 Well, I'm banking on your dead asses getting me a bigger salary. 1239 01:05:30.970 --> 01:05:32.319 -[gun cocks] -Say hi to Will. 1240 01:05:34.408 --> 01:05:36.062 [Miles] Oh, oh! Shit! 1241 01:05:39.805 --> 01:05:41.894 -This way! -[Miles] Is this the way back to the cabin? 1242 01:05:42.068 --> 01:05:44.331 -[Dylan] Is it? Oh, shit. -[gun cocks] 1243 01:05:45.028 --> 01:05:47.856 Oh, shit. Damn! She's gaining on us! 1244 01:05:48.292 --> 01:05:50.598 -[loud gunshot] -Three years of latent leg energy! 1245 01:05:50.772 --> 01:05:53.645 -[Mandy] Ha! Will thought he could get away, too. -[loud gunshot] 1246 01:05:53.819 --> 01:05:57.214 [uptempo rock music] 1247 01:05:58.041 --> 01:05:59.520 -[loud gunshot] -[Dylan] Shit! 1248 01:06:04.438 --> 01:06:06.963 [microwave rumbles and dings] 1249 01:06:07.441 --> 01:06:10.140 Man, coming back to work after lunch is like having sex with your ex, 1250 01:06:10.314 --> 01:06:12.316 -that you know has an incurable STD, bro! -[laughs] 1251 01:06:12.490 --> 01:06:14.361 Every fiber in you knows that you shouldn't, 1252 01:06:14.535 --> 01:06:16.668 -but here we are again, drenched in sex sweat... -[grunts loudly] 1253 01:06:16.842 --> 01:06:18.626 ...on our way back to the free clinic. 1254 01:06:18.800 --> 01:06:20.802 -[grunts loudly] -[chuckles] What the fuck... 1255 01:06:20.977 --> 01:06:22.500 -[loud grunting] -Shit... 1256 01:06:22.674 --> 01:06:24.502 Bros, come on! 1257 01:06:24.676 --> 01:06:26.895 It's simple. It's a thrust, 1258 01:06:27.896 --> 01:06:31.291 -calf raise, thrust, calf raise. -Oh, my God! 1259 01:06:31.465 --> 01:06:33.641 -There we go! [grunts] -[phone ringing] 1260 01:06:33.815 --> 01:06:36.514 [loud grunting] 1261 01:06:36.688 --> 01:06:39.386 -Yo, you hearing this guy? [laughter] -What's so funny, guys? 1262 01:06:39.560 --> 01:06:41.432 Come on. Chicks don't like sticks. 1263 01:06:41.606 --> 01:06:43.173 What, y'all see my live stream last night, 1264 01:06:43.347 --> 01:06:45.088 of me sharting on the squat rack? 1265 01:06:45.262 --> 01:06:47.699 -[Juan] Oh, my God! -I deleted it! What? No! 1266 01:06:47.873 --> 01:06:50.876 -Come on! -[all] Happy Birthday! 1267 01:06:51.050 --> 01:06:54.575 -[applauding] -Who wants cupcakes? 1268 01:06:55.446 --> 01:06:57.752 Wait! I never got a cake for my birthday. 1269 01:06:58.362 --> 01:07:00.581 -When was your birthday? -March 15th! 1270 01:07:01.321 --> 01:07:03.845 Maybe we missed March this year. When was it last year? 1271 01:07:05.891 --> 01:07:08.546 -Guys, let's take 87 seconds... -[emotional uplifting music] 1272 01:07:08.720 --> 01:07:10.417 ...to honor our fallen comrade Will, 1273 01:07:10.591 --> 01:07:13.377 and the value he brought to DanRick. 1274 01:07:14.030 --> 01:07:16.336 Can we finish my birthday cupcakes first? 1275 01:07:19.252 --> 01:07:21.646 -Will... -[crying] 1276 01:07:21.820 --> 01:07:23.996 Yes, yes, we all should feel comfortable 1277 01:07:24.170 --> 01:07:25.606 shedding a tear or two for Will. 1278 01:07:26.172 --> 01:07:27.782 -He was a great man. -[crying continues] 1279 01:07:27.956 --> 01:07:29.610 A decent coa-- 1280 01:07:34.746 --> 01:07:37.270 -[upbeat hip hop music] -Woo! 1281 01:07:37.444 --> 01:07:39.011 -[laughter] -Woo! 1282 01:07:43.189 --> 01:07:45.061 [panting] 1283 01:07:50.762 --> 01:07:51.632 Oh! 1284 01:07:53.678 --> 01:07:55.332 [Miles] Small bitch can run, man. 1285 01:07:58.030 --> 01:08:00.119 I'm not trying to be racist or anything, man, but... 1286 01:08:01.773 --> 01:08:03.731 couldn't you grab a gun? Aren't there a ton 1287 01:08:03.905 --> 01:08:06.125 -of shootings in South Central? -Oh, please. 1288 01:08:06.299 --> 01:08:08.780 You guys the ones always shooting up the schools. 1289 01:08:08.954 --> 01:08:11.217 -I kicked leaves, what did you do? -I pissed myself. 1290 01:08:11.391 --> 01:08:13.001 I was so scared. 1291 01:08:16.788 --> 01:08:19.269 [spiritual folk music] 1292 01:08:28.191 --> 01:08:30.323 [Miles] Man, you were crying like a fucking baby. 1293 01:08:30.801 --> 01:08:33.109 [Dylan] Of course I was, she had a gun in my face! 1294 01:08:33.282 --> 01:08:35.675 -You didn't fear for your life? -[man] Fear! 1295 01:08:36.634 --> 01:08:39.071 -Oh, shit! -False Evidence Appearing Real. 1296 01:08:39.245 --> 01:08:41.203 -Who are you? -He's with Mandy, bro. Come on! 1297 01:08:42.030 --> 01:08:44.772 -I don't belong to a Mandy. -You ain't hear those gunshots? 1298 01:08:44.946 --> 01:08:46.383 I heard your friend say he was scared. 1299 01:08:46.905 --> 01:08:50.126 I am here to clear my mind of the fear, 1300 01:08:50.517 --> 01:08:53.041 or False Evidence Appearing Real. 1301 01:08:53.345 --> 01:08:55.696 False? Those were real bullets! 1302 01:08:56.306 --> 01:09:01.485 Some people die from bullets, but most... die from living. 1303 01:09:01.658 --> 01:09:03.661 Come on, man. We don't have time to listen to his Socrates 1304 01:09:03.835 --> 01:09:05.532 and his forest philosophies. Come on-- 1305 01:09:05.706 --> 01:09:07.708 Hey, man, let-- let's see what he has to say. 1306 01:09:08.405 --> 01:09:09.884 You know, he might have some water. 1307 01:09:10.885 --> 01:09:12.059 You got any water? 1308 01:09:17.587 --> 01:09:18.545 Drink. 1309 01:09:22.767 --> 01:09:25.509 Man, this that shit where, White people always curious. 1310 01:09:25.683 --> 01:09:27.467 [panting] 1311 01:09:29.077 --> 01:09:31.950 [owl hooting] 1312 01:09:32.124 --> 01:09:34.866 So, I have this new app that's supposed to launch tonight, 1313 01:09:35.606 --> 01:09:38.957 but we have this... glitch. 1314 01:09:39.523 --> 01:09:44.005 and I think it's because, we are all more afraid of making a mistake. 1315 01:09:45.093 --> 01:09:48.444 We focus so much on the success, that we don't allow ourselves 1316 01:09:48.619 --> 01:09:50.055 to fail gracefully. 1317 01:09:50.751 --> 01:09:53.841 Fear... False Evidence Appearing Real. 1318 01:09:54.014 --> 01:09:56.235 Exactly. 1319 01:09:56.409 --> 01:09:58.281 -What's the app? -It's called... 1320 01:09:59.151 --> 01:10:00.718 -"Clone." -[musical fanfare] 1321 01:10:00.892 --> 01:10:02.675 You can post tasks that you need to be done. 1322 01:10:02.850 --> 01:10:04.809 Qualified people bid on the task. 1323 01:10:04.983 --> 01:10:07.333 And you pick the person, at their cost. 1324 01:10:08.073 --> 01:10:11.076 Grocery shopping list, pick up kids from school, 1325 01:10:11.250 --> 01:10:13.861 work spreadsheets, sperm donations. 1326 01:10:14.818 --> 01:10:17.082 -Anything? -Anything. 1327 01:10:17.691 --> 01:10:19.389 Come to your house and cook dinner naked, 1328 01:10:19.563 --> 01:10:21.782 then clean up after? [blows excitedly] 1329 01:10:21.956 --> 01:10:23.175 Domestic categories. 1330 01:10:23.871 --> 01:10:26.874 -Find me a girlfriend? -Uh, long term? 1331 01:10:27.048 --> 01:10:28.615 Or for a brief encounter? 1332 01:10:29.355 --> 01:10:31.314 -Ooh! -[laughter] 1333 01:10:34.273 --> 01:10:38.538 -Hey, man. I'm feeling pretty good. -[sparkling chimes] 1334 01:10:38.712 --> 01:10:41.585 [chuckles] Dude, like, such a good vibe! 1335 01:10:41.759 --> 01:10:43.630 -[applauds] -Yeah. Yeah. 1336 01:10:43.804 --> 01:10:46.023 Awesome, right? [chuckles] 1337 01:10:46.198 --> 01:10:48.722 Wait, are you guys talking about my app, or about the peyote water? 1338 01:10:48.896 --> 01:10:51.029 Because, you never know what you're gonna get with that. 1339 01:10:51.464 --> 01:10:52.596 What the fuck? 1340 01:10:52.770 --> 01:10:54.380 [echoes] What the fuck? 1341 01:10:56.034 --> 01:10:59.166 -Relax, guys. -I've never done drugs in my life, man. 1342 01:10:59.342 --> 01:11:01.605 Oh, man! Oh, man! It feels like my soul 1343 01:11:01.779 --> 01:11:03.476 is gonna crack out of my chest plate! 1344 01:11:03.650 --> 01:11:07.045 Oh, wow, man! You guys need a distraction. 1345 01:11:07.219 --> 01:11:09.395 Loo-- look, zero in, man. 1346 01:11:10.440 --> 01:11:12.137 Say, do you guys know tech? 1347 01:11:13.878 --> 01:11:16.968 Okay, so my cloud server is having issues, 1348 01:11:17.142 --> 01:11:19.318 because of the memory that's allotted to it. 1349 01:11:19.492 --> 01:11:22.452 [upbeat Spanish pop music] 1350 01:11:56.616 --> 01:11:59.576 But if your core network is slowed with the inter-latent packet loss... 1351 01:11:59.924 --> 01:12:02.621 Then you have to reset the security model functions. 1352 01:12:02.796 --> 01:12:04.362 -Your problem isn't-- -Your problem isn't a-- 1353 01:12:04.537 --> 01:12:06.278 -You go ahead. -Floor is yours. 1354 01:12:06.452 --> 01:12:09.541 It looks like it may be bogged down by a central server... 1355 01:12:09.716 --> 01:12:12.284 Where, with peer-to-peer compression, your data transfer 1356 01:12:12.458 --> 01:12:13.851 will be much more efficient. 1357 01:12:14.025 --> 01:12:15.766 It won't be cheap, but not only will it 1358 01:12:15.940 --> 01:12:18.290 fix the issue with the S.A.T. framework... 1359 01:12:18.464 --> 01:12:21.337 Your sustainability will improve an additional... 1360 01:12:21.946 --> 01:12:24.514 -five years. -Start a crowdfunding. 1361 01:12:24.688 --> 01:12:26.864 -35k will do. -Wow! 1362 01:12:27.038 --> 01:12:29.127 You guys are either tripping balls or geniuses. 1363 01:12:29.300 --> 01:12:30.693 [chuckles] 1364 01:12:31.085 --> 01:12:31.999 [bird squawks] 1365 01:12:32.173 --> 01:12:33.130 -Crap! -What? 1366 01:12:33.305 --> 01:12:34.567 -High peak! -Gotta go! 1367 01:12:35.655 --> 01:12:36.439 Wait, guys! 1368 01:12:37.222 --> 01:12:38.789 [uptempo rock music] 1369 01:12:39.572 --> 01:12:41.357 [pants] Oh shit. 1370 01:12:44.534 --> 01:12:46.666 -This way? -Yeah, that way. 1371 01:12:49.277 --> 01:12:51.454 Miles, I'm White. You got to slow it down! 1372 01:12:51.628 --> 01:12:52.672 Come on, man. Let's go! 1373 01:12:53.325 --> 01:12:55.109 [panting] 1374 01:12:55.282 --> 01:12:56.937 We're almost there, man. Come on! 1375 01:12:57.938 --> 01:12:59.940 [panting] 1376 01:13:00.114 --> 01:13:01.202 [Dylan] Oh, shit! 1377 01:13:05.163 --> 01:13:06.120 That bitch! 1378 01:13:06.294 --> 01:13:07.731 Agh! She blocked us in! 1379 01:13:08.427 --> 01:13:09.689 He shot our phones. 1380 01:13:09.862 --> 01:13:11.474 -What are we gonna do? -We're stuck. 1381 01:13:16.217 --> 01:13:17.218 [loud gunshot] 1382 01:13:17.784 --> 01:13:18.611 Ah, shit! 1383 01:13:20.178 --> 01:13:21.745 -[gun cocks] -Yes, Mandy. That's the spirit! 1384 01:13:21.919 --> 01:13:23.224 [loud gunshot] 1385 01:13:23.398 --> 01:13:25.096 Well, you're just full of will power. 1386 01:13:25.705 --> 01:13:27.184 -[chuckles] -[gun cocks] 1387 01:13:38.630 --> 01:13:40.327 [keys jangle] 1388 01:13:42.940 --> 01:13:44.420 [whimsical music] 1389 01:13:44.594 --> 01:13:46.117 [Dylan blows raspberry] 1390 01:13:46.291 --> 01:13:48.641 -What are you doing? -I saw it on a movie once. 1391 01:13:48.815 --> 01:13:50.295 It's an old school Uber. 1392 01:13:50.469 --> 01:13:52.384 You put your thumb up and a car picks you up. 1393 01:13:52.950 --> 01:13:55.474 -How does it work? -I imagine, the body puts out 1394 01:13:55.648 --> 01:13:57.998 some sort of cosmic beacon. 1395 01:14:00.958 --> 01:14:03.482 You're the secret to jacking off. 1396 01:14:03.656 --> 01:14:05.832 [engine rumbles] 1397 01:14:13.100 --> 01:14:15.146 -Kinetic energy! -[chuckles] 1398 01:14:21.978 --> 01:14:23.763 We don't have to pay him in blowjobs, do we? 1399 01:14:32.293 --> 01:14:33.991 [engine rumbles] 1400 01:14:35.383 --> 01:14:36.776 -We need to talk! -We need to talk! 1401 01:14:36.950 --> 01:14:39.257 Well, I'll let you guys get to it. 1402 01:14:39.431 --> 01:14:40.476 I hope I helped. 1403 01:14:42.041 --> 01:14:44.392 Hey, guys. Can I talk to you for a sec? 1404 01:14:49.920 --> 01:14:52.443 [engine rumbles] 1405 01:14:58.581 --> 01:15:00.103 [intense dubstep music] 1406 01:15:36.139 --> 01:15:37.620 [dramatic musical sting] 1407 01:15:38.490 --> 01:15:40.884 Are you fricking kidding me? 1408 01:15:41.537 --> 01:15:44.061 Rape, embezzlement, attempted murder! 1409 01:15:44.235 --> 01:15:46.193 -What? -What? What are you talking about? 1410 01:15:46.367 --> 01:15:49.282 We didn't try to rape Mandy! Ew! 1411 01:15:49.457 --> 01:15:52.068 No, you just tried to kill her! 1412 01:15:52.243 --> 01:15:54.593 -She tried to kill us! -Oh, sure. 1413 01:15:54.767 --> 01:15:56.508 She tried to run you over in her wheelchair. 1414 01:15:56.682 --> 01:15:58.858 Roadkill, right? Cool story, bro. 1415 01:15:59.032 --> 01:16:01.469 She was shooting at us! 1416 01:16:01.644 --> 01:16:03.384 And her legs aren't useless, bro. 1417 01:16:03.559 --> 01:16:05.255 They just pale! Look, just look. 1418 01:16:05.430 --> 01:16:07.475 -Oh, come on. What are you doing? -[man] No, Miles! 1419 01:16:07.650 --> 01:16:09.739 [people screaming] 1420 01:16:09.913 --> 01:16:11.478 [Dylan] No, no, no, no. No, really. 1421 01:16:11.654 --> 01:16:13.481 -What? -See! 1422 01:16:14.700 --> 01:16:16.746 [people screaming] 1423 01:16:16.920 --> 01:16:20.010 No, no, come on! Look, she stands! See! See! 1424 01:16:20.487 --> 01:16:23.666 [tense dramatic music] 1425 01:16:24.580 --> 01:16:26.538 That-- that's mierda! 1426 01:16:26.843 --> 01:16:28.714 -I just said it! -It's okay, Harry. 1427 01:16:29.106 --> 01:16:30.934 They don't call me "Handy Mandy" for nothing. 1428 01:16:35.025 --> 01:16:36.504 Dance... 1429 01:16:36.679 --> 01:16:38.637 -[man] Jesus Christ. -[Tyrone] You seeing this? 1430 01:16:39.464 --> 01:16:41.161 It's a diversion! 1431 01:16:41.727 --> 01:16:44.034 And the money you've been embezzling! 1432 01:16:44.208 --> 01:16:45.905 What you did to Shayne! 1433 01:16:49.561 --> 01:16:51.215 I wasn't even working here then! 1434 01:16:51.650 --> 01:16:53.913 Are you kidding me? Man, I don't date White girls! 1435 01:16:54.087 --> 01:16:55.741 I'm not racist, though, all right? 1436 01:16:56.175 --> 01:16:58.309 We were gonna promote one of you! 1437 01:16:58.875 --> 01:17:02.705 We trusted you guys and you repay us with slander? 1438 01:17:03.053 --> 01:17:06.230 Okay, okay. He didn't rape Shayne. 1439 01:17:06.404 --> 01:17:08.580 She set him up, to get me promoted. 1440 01:17:09.146 --> 01:17:11.670 -Well, that's a reach-around! -And the money wasn't stolen. 1441 01:17:11.844 --> 01:17:14.412 -Lonzo faked it to take him out of the running. -Hmm, no, bro. 1442 01:17:14.585 --> 01:17:16.196 -Leave me out of this one! -Oh... [chuckles] 1443 01:17:16.370 --> 01:17:19.460 What happened to good, old-fashioned hard work? 1444 01:17:19.635 --> 01:17:21.985 Fucking end this already! 1445 01:17:22.159 --> 01:17:24.422 Harry, this isn't even a company report. 1446 01:17:24.596 --> 01:17:28.121 These pictures are obviously photoshopped on Microsoft Paint. 1447 01:17:28.295 --> 01:17:29.732 There's no need to call the cops. 1448 01:17:33.561 --> 01:17:35.868 Uh-- I need to make a call. 1449 01:17:36.041 --> 01:17:39.306 -Hold, but she really tried to kill us, man! -Oh, sure. 1450 01:17:39.480 --> 01:17:41.178 I mean, you guys just admitted you're willing to break 1451 01:17:41.352 --> 01:17:43.397 all morality and principles for a job, 1452 01:17:43.571 --> 01:17:46.357 but now we're supposed to believe that... 1453 01:17:46.923 --> 01:17:50.187 the woman in the wheelchair, in the woods, 1454 01:17:50.361 --> 01:17:52.102 attempted to murder you? 1455 01:17:52.276 --> 01:17:54.800 [chuckles] You guys are more fucked than I am. 1456 01:17:54.974 --> 01:17:56.280 Oh, fuck me. 1457 01:17:56.454 --> 01:17:57.847 Let's make this easy. 1458 01:17:58.674 --> 01:18:00.893 -You're both fired. Leave the key fobs. -But-- but-- 1459 01:18:01.067 --> 01:18:02.808 but what about the kids' size Voltrons? 1460 01:18:02.982 --> 01:18:04.592 What about my dad's house? 1461 01:18:04.767 --> 01:18:07.291 -I said, "Fired!" -But-- but come on! 1462 01:18:07.465 --> 01:18:08.987 [dramatic musical sting] 1463 01:18:10.990 --> 01:18:12.035 [Miles sighs] 1464 01:18:12.209 --> 01:18:14.166 [Dylan sighs] 1465 01:18:16.213 --> 01:18:18.781 -Congrats on staying alive. -[keys jangle] 1466 01:18:18.955 --> 01:18:20.085 Job's yours. 1467 01:18:22.132 --> 01:18:24.264 [indistinct chatter] 1468 01:18:27.398 --> 01:18:28.529 Congrats, Mandy. 1469 01:18:34.273 --> 01:18:37.843 My bad, G. Guess we took it a little too far, huh? 1470 01:18:39.323 --> 01:18:42.065 [chuckles] Right... Well, fuck them crack-ass crackers! 1471 01:18:43.196 --> 01:18:45.111 -Right? -'Zo, do me a favor. 1472 01:18:45.285 --> 01:18:46.722 Yeah, I got you, man. Anything. 1473 01:18:47.505 --> 01:18:48.549 Fuck off! 1474 01:18:51.727 --> 01:18:54.773 [uptempo hip hop music] 1475 01:18:58.298 --> 01:19:01.824 [scoffs] So fucking typical. 1476 01:19:02.650 --> 01:19:05.349 They had to go pull some bullshit Rooney Rule. 1477 01:19:08.656 --> 01:19:10.876 But you had real dick, Dylan. 1478 01:19:12.443 --> 01:19:15.663 You deserve that manipulative red dress. 1479 01:19:15.838 --> 01:19:17.883 [figurine rattles] 1480 01:19:19.493 --> 01:19:22.322 You know, I'd rather paper-slice my dick hole 1481 01:19:22.496 --> 01:19:24.237 and stick it in a tank full of piranhas, 1482 01:19:24.411 --> 01:19:25.934 than fuck with a racist bitch like you. 1483 01:19:32.245 --> 01:19:35.466 He is such a hung dick right now. 1484 01:19:36.815 --> 01:19:37.728 [soft moan] 1485 01:19:38.730 --> 01:19:40.253 [door creaks] 1486 01:19:43.213 --> 01:19:45.781 -Grab a beer? -I was gonna say shots. 1487 01:19:45.955 --> 01:19:48.784 But-- wait, wait, wait. The office closed early today? 1488 01:19:49.959 --> 01:19:52.744 No, they're having a little party. 1489 01:19:53.092 --> 01:19:55.486 What-- a party? Hey, and they best be 1490 01:19:55.660 --> 01:19:57.923 cleaning up after they self, too. 1491 01:19:58.489 --> 01:20:01.231 Why do you both have boxes? Who got the promotion? 1492 01:20:02.058 --> 01:20:06.279 Yeah, now y'all moving on up! [chuckles] 1493 01:20:06.452 --> 01:20:09.934 -No, we're moving on out. -Hmm? 1494 01:20:10.109 --> 01:20:12.023 What? No promotion? 1495 01:20:12.198 --> 01:20:13.025 No job. 1496 01:20:17.029 --> 01:20:18.596 Hey, Lainee. 1497 01:20:19.466 --> 01:20:21.468 Don't be afraid to be a kid for a little while. 1498 01:20:22.034 --> 01:20:24.994 Yeah, a long while. 1499 01:20:25.603 --> 01:20:26.473 Deuces, Ant. 1500 01:20:34.046 --> 01:20:36.092 -Fuck this place. -[elevator dings] 1501 01:20:38.702 --> 01:20:42.011 [soulful melancholic music] 1502 01:20:45.536 --> 01:20:47.712 [indistinct background chatter] 1503 01:20:50.584 --> 01:20:52.717 Oh, sorry, guys. This spot's actually reserved, 1504 01:20:52.891 --> 01:20:55.023 but I have another great spot free over by the bar. 1505 01:21:00.550 --> 01:21:01.682 [blows raspberry] 1506 01:21:04.250 --> 01:21:07.601 -[sighs] -Hey, dudes. 1507 01:21:08.166 --> 01:21:10.909 Usually I'll say a double, but you guys look like you need a triple. 1508 01:21:11.431 --> 01:21:12.432 Got you. 1509 01:21:15.827 --> 01:21:18.395 Profiling over here, because my boy's wearing a White tee. 1510 01:21:18.568 --> 01:21:21.050 -Can't get VIP? -Look, man. 1511 01:21:21.441 --> 01:21:23.008 I'm really sorry for everything. 1512 01:21:23.574 --> 01:21:26.446 I respect you for trying to save your pop's crib. I mean... 1513 01:21:26.620 --> 01:21:29.014 My sister is in real estate, I can hit her up for options? 1514 01:21:29.188 --> 01:21:31.147 I appreciate it, man, but I don't know how much 1515 01:21:31.321 --> 01:21:32.888 that's gonna do for me, with no money. 1516 01:21:34.019 --> 01:21:35.499 I'm sorry for you, too, man. 1517 01:21:35.978 --> 01:21:38.154 If I could help out those kids in any way, I would. 1518 01:21:38.327 --> 01:21:39.807 You didn't try to end my life today, man. 1519 01:21:39.982 --> 01:21:41.940 -It was that fake crippled bitch. -Mm-hmm. 1520 01:21:42.114 --> 01:21:43.855 -See, that's what's wrong with this country. -Mm-hmm. 1521 01:21:44.029 --> 01:21:46.335 -Scandalous people. -Mm-hmm. 1522 01:21:47.772 --> 01:21:48.947 Mm-hmm. 1523 01:21:51.645 --> 01:21:52.777 Ahh! 1524 01:21:53.559 --> 01:21:54.431 [coughs] 1525 01:21:55.084 --> 01:21:56.693 I mean, there's always freelance, 1526 01:21:56.868 --> 01:21:57.956 but I need a consistent paycheck. 1527 01:21:58.130 --> 01:21:59.610 -I hear that. -[chuckles] 1528 01:21:59.784 --> 01:22:01.568 Now, I live with a roommate who steals my shit 1529 01:22:01.742 --> 01:22:03.005 and sells it on eBay. 1530 01:22:04.136 --> 01:22:05.964 -Well, at least you have your own space. -[sighs] 1531 01:22:06.138 --> 01:22:08.139 Man, I still live in my parents' garage... 1532 01:22:09.054 --> 01:22:10.534 where they still park at, man! 1533 01:22:11.665 --> 01:22:12.797 -Another round! -Another round! 1534 01:22:12.971 --> 01:22:14.016 [glasses chink] 1535 01:22:14.930 --> 01:22:18.020 [uptempo techno music] 1536 01:22:20.022 --> 01:22:23.808 Come on. One, two, three! 1537 01:22:28.334 --> 01:22:29.422 Ahh! 1538 01:22:31.424 --> 01:22:33.296 Ahh! 1539 01:22:33.687 --> 01:22:35.862 Woo! Hoo-hoo-hoo! 1540 01:22:36.168 --> 01:22:38.170 -[groans] -Woo! 1541 01:22:38.344 --> 01:22:42.305 -We got a handy from Mandy. -[groans] Man! 1542 01:22:43.393 --> 01:22:45.568 I don't know what sucks more, us getting shafted, 1543 01:22:45.743 --> 01:22:48.746 or us losing to Mandy, man. I'm not a loser! 1544 01:22:49.050 --> 01:22:50.530 And I never lose! 1545 01:22:51.314 --> 01:22:54.839 I only have a found box, because I've never lost anything. 1546 01:22:55.013 --> 01:22:56.493 Oh, watch this. 1547 01:22:57.362 --> 01:22:59.713 I never had sex! 1548 01:22:59.887 --> 01:23:02.237 [laughter and jeering] 1549 01:23:02.412 --> 01:23:04.109 Because I didn't want to lose my virginity. 1550 01:23:04.282 --> 01:23:06.285 [both giggle] 1551 01:23:06.894 --> 01:23:08.244 [laughs] 1552 01:23:12.291 --> 01:23:14.032 We should open our own firm. 1553 01:23:14.641 --> 01:23:16.382 With no money, imagine that. 1554 01:23:16.730 --> 01:23:19.037 I'm trying to imagine how we're gonna pay these bills! 1555 01:23:19.210 --> 01:23:21.344 Uh, I'm playin the black card... [chuckles] 1556 01:23:21.518 --> 01:23:24.434 -Imagination is a state of being. -[sparkling chimes] 1557 01:23:25.391 --> 01:23:28.655 Man! You are everywhere! 1558 01:23:29.091 --> 01:23:31.484 -Wait, wait, wait, wait. Huh? -[chuckles] 1559 01:23:31.657 --> 01:23:35.053 -Are you a Clone app? -[all laugh] 1560 01:23:35.227 --> 01:23:36.576 -Drink, guys. -Huh? 1561 01:23:37.577 --> 01:23:39.405 -Enjoy! -Oh-- Oh. 1562 01:23:39.579 --> 01:23:42.626 -The drink. I know what you like to drink! -[laughter] 1563 01:23:42.800 --> 01:23:45.455 -Peyote. -[chuckles] It's my specialty. 1564 01:23:46.282 --> 01:23:48.893 But today we are celebrating. 1565 01:23:49.067 --> 01:23:51.112 -Huh? Huh? -Come on over, guys. 1566 01:23:51.722 --> 01:23:53.245 -You're a big part of the reason. -Okay. 1567 01:23:53.419 --> 01:23:56.596 [clears throat] Transfer their check to mine, 1568 01:23:56.770 --> 01:23:59.860 -double everything on this table. -Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 1569 01:24:00.035 --> 01:24:02.776 -I want these guys passed out, in an hour? -Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 1570 01:24:02.950 --> 01:24:05.214 -[chuckles] Come on. -Yes, yes. Let's go. 1571 01:24:05.388 --> 01:24:07.781 Let's go. Let's go, free drinks, man! Come on, come on! 1572 01:24:07.955 --> 01:24:10.393 -Get your ass up, let's go drink beer. -[groans] 1573 01:24:10.567 --> 01:24:13.657 -[loud clanging] -Oh, shit! Sorry about that, ladies. 1574 01:24:13.831 --> 01:24:15.746 -Ha-ha! Oh-- oh! -I'm not sorry. 1575 01:24:15.920 --> 01:24:18.705 -Yep. -Hi, I'm Dylan! 1576 01:24:18.879 --> 01:24:22.100 ["Bounce" by Don Lennon] 1577 01:24:25.234 --> 01:24:27.279 ♪ Everybody bounce ♪ 1578 01:24:29.107 --> 01:24:30.326 [laughter] 1579 01:24:30.630 --> 01:24:31.978 [music fades] 1580 01:24:32.154 --> 01:24:34.678 -So, the launch went great? -Well... 1581 01:24:35.679 --> 01:24:37.028 We didn't actually launch. 1582 01:24:37.637 --> 01:24:38.943 After I heard your recommendations, 1583 01:24:39.117 --> 01:24:41.032 I was feeling so good about the demo. 1584 01:24:41.772 --> 01:24:44.253 I made a couple of calls, and sold the app for 30 mil. 1585 01:24:44.427 --> 01:24:45.950 -[coughs] -[chuckles] 1586 01:24:46.516 --> 01:24:48.692 That deserves a salute! 1587 01:24:49.214 --> 01:24:52.957 -At least one of us made it out nice today, man. -[chuckles] 1588 01:24:54.350 --> 01:24:57.092 So, you guys were over there, talking about opening a firm. 1589 01:24:57.831 --> 01:24:59.702 -What type? -Software. 1590 01:24:59.877 --> 01:25:03.402 -Like we do now. -Well, if you are half as good 1591 01:25:03.576 --> 01:25:05.230 as that problem solving in the woods... 1592 01:25:06.492 --> 01:25:07.318 you're hired! 1593 01:25:10.061 --> 01:25:11.976 Specifically, what are you saying? 1594 01:25:12.150 --> 01:25:13.585 Because I'm very intoxicated. 1595 01:25:15.110 --> 01:25:16.415 I owe you guys. 1596 01:25:16.807 --> 01:25:20.898 I... will... invest... 1597 01:25:21.812 --> 01:25:22.987 In us? 1598 01:25:24.119 --> 01:25:27.165 Say in us, please say in us! 1599 01:25:27.773 --> 01:25:29.036 -In you. -[whimpers] 1600 01:25:29.210 --> 01:25:32.562 -[screams] Oh! -[screams] Yeah! 1601 01:25:32.736 --> 01:25:34.520 -Hoo-hoo! -Hey, Brandy, 1602 01:25:34.693 --> 01:25:36.305 have legal draft up contracts for these guys. 1603 01:25:36.478 --> 01:25:38.219 -[Brandy] Welcome aboard! -[chuckles] 1604 01:25:38.394 --> 01:25:40.570 So, you guys start thinking of names for the new company. 1605 01:25:42.005 --> 01:25:43.486 We're gonna need a leader, man. 1606 01:25:44.139 --> 01:25:45.879 -You're hired! -Oh, Dylan, man. 1607 01:25:46.053 --> 01:25:48.925 I need a strong co-lead by my side, man! 1608 01:25:50.362 --> 01:25:52.016 You hired, bro! 1609 01:25:52.495 --> 01:25:54.148 [Brandy] I think that deserves a toast! 1610 01:25:54.323 --> 01:25:56.151 -[laughter] -Congratulations!!! 1611 01:25:56.889 --> 01:25:59.284 -[all] Cheers! -[glasses chink] 1612 01:26:06.030 --> 01:26:08.424 -You're so pretty... [chuckles] -Thank you, stop! 1613 01:26:08.946 --> 01:26:10.165 All right. Cheers. 1614 01:26:11.557 --> 01:26:13.037 [giggles] Mmm! 1615 01:26:15.648 --> 01:26:17.737 [both giggle] 1616 01:26:23.612 --> 01:26:25.484 And I would have gotten away with it, 1617 01:26:25.789 --> 01:26:29.096 if it weren't for you, Captain White Dick, 1618 01:26:30.054 --> 01:26:31.838 and Black Panther Cock. 1619 01:26:32.187 --> 01:26:35.190 [rock music] 1620 01:26:37.192 --> 01:26:39.759 [regal music] 1621 01:26:39.933 --> 01:26:41.326 -[man 1] We know... -[man 2] What you've been doing... 1622 01:26:41.500 --> 01:26:42.936 -[man 1] ...On company... -[man 2] ...Time! 1623 01:26:43.110 --> 01:26:46.201 -[moans] -Say hi to mother Russia, Brendan! 1624 01:26:46.375 --> 01:26:50.161 -[Brendan] I can't-- I can't go! I c-- let go! No! -[indistinct shouting] 1625 01:26:50.335 --> 01:26:53.469 [man 1] Your stripes are running, because you're a faketriot! 1626 01:26:53.991 --> 01:26:56.689 -This is harassment! No! -[indistinct shouting] 1627 01:26:57.386 --> 01:26:58.735 -[copier whirring] -[scoffs] 1628 01:26:59.214 --> 01:27:00.867 [blows raspberry] Pshh! 1629 01:27:01.520 --> 01:27:03.478 Don't work up a sweat and get your back all wet. 1630 01:27:04.610 --> 01:27:06.960 What did you say, Ann Coulter wannabe? 1631 01:27:07.134 --> 01:27:09.398 [scoffs] You got a problem, ese? 1632 01:27:09.572 --> 01:27:11.835 -Yeah, Nazi snowflake. -Ugh! 1633 01:27:19.451 --> 01:27:21.888 -[hip hop music] -[rapping] ♪ Put her in a box put her in a box ♪ 1634 01:27:23.150 --> 01:27:25.762 ♪ Put her in a box put her in a box ♪ 1635 01:27:26.893 --> 01:27:29.592 ♪ Put her in a box put her in a box ♪ 1636 01:27:30.070 --> 01:27:32.594 ♪ And throw away the keys to the lock ♪ 1637 01:27:32.769 --> 01:27:34.074 But, Harry! 1638 01:27:35.467 --> 01:27:36.294 [door slams] 1639 01:27:41.778 --> 01:27:43.867 Well, well, well. 1640 01:27:44.563 --> 01:27:47.262 -If it isn't my old pal, Handy Mandy. -[handcuffs jangle] 1641 01:27:47.610 --> 01:27:50.482 -Or should I say, Murder Mandy? -[gun cocks] 1642 01:27:51.744 --> 01:27:54.878 -How the fuck did you find me, Sanders? -Oh, it wasn't easy. 1643 01:27:55.487 --> 01:27:57.402 Some might even say, "Not so simple." 1644 01:27:57.576 --> 01:28:01.014 Those three men you decapitated in Tennessee. 1645 01:28:01.188 --> 01:28:03.365 The little old lady's hand you cut off. 1646 01:28:03.539 --> 01:28:04.583 Jackson Hole. 1647 01:28:05.192 --> 01:28:06.106 Seattle. 1648 01:28:06.498 --> 01:28:07.847 Houston, we have a problem. 1649 01:28:08.413 --> 01:28:10.371 -And finally-- -No, until finally, 1650 01:28:10.546 --> 01:28:12.635 I left behind a clue so obvious, 1651 01:28:12.809 --> 01:28:14.941 that even your blind ass couldn't miss it. 1652 01:28:15.333 --> 01:28:18.597 -Replacing Will's eyeballs with testicles? A little sloppy. -[chuckles] 1653 01:28:19.772 --> 01:28:22.645 Why stop, hmm? Why stop at 100 bodies? 1654 01:28:23.298 --> 01:28:25.561 Well, maybe I'm tired, Sanders? 1655 01:28:26.213 --> 01:28:29.041 Tired of all the blood and all the running, or... 1656 01:28:29.565 --> 01:28:31.610 you know, maybe I'm not! 1657 01:28:33.090 --> 01:28:34.264 -[loud gunshots] -Do you hear that? 1658 01:28:34.439 --> 01:28:35.962 No, no, no, no... Mmm... [inaudible] 1659 01:28:38.094 --> 01:28:41.316 Or maybe I just set your bitch-ass up. 1660 01:28:41.794 --> 01:28:43.100 -[dull thud] -[grunts] 1661 01:28:46.799 --> 01:28:48.758 I mean, don't flaunt it, if you're not gonna throw it. 1662 01:28:48.932 --> 01:28:50.629 -[hip hop music] -Will be getting it in! 1663 01:28:50.803 --> 01:28:52.675 Will be getting it in! 1664 01:28:52.849 --> 01:28:54.546 He don't play. I don't play. 1665 01:28:54.719 --> 01:28:56.068 That's just the way we live. 1666 01:28:56.896 --> 01:28:58.463 Will be getting it in! 1667 01:28:58.637 --> 01:29:00.813 W-- Will be getting it in! 1668 01:29:00.987 --> 01:29:02.598 He don't play. I don't play. 1669 01:29:02.772 --> 01:29:04.295 That's just the way we live. 1670 01:29:04.469 --> 01:29:05.949 That-- that's just the way we live. 1671 01:29:07.951 --> 01:29:09.648 [cuckooing] 1672 01:29:09.822 --> 01:29:12.085 [uptempo hip hop music] 1673 01:29:12.259 --> 01:29:17.047 -Bro, we're business partners now! -Bro! 1674 01:29:20.311 --> 01:29:21.268 Hey, man. 1675 01:29:22.835 --> 01:29:24.489 Now that we're business partners. 1676 01:29:25.882 --> 01:29:27.231 Can I say the N word? 1677 01:29:29.146 --> 01:29:32.584 Dude, you gave me the smallest room in your dad's crib! 1678 01:29:32.758 --> 01:29:35.413 At least there's no car there! And I'm gonna make 1679 01:29:35.587 --> 01:29:38.416 the biggest donation to those kids' tech thing. 1680 01:29:41.550 --> 01:29:43.594 All right, one free pass, yeah? 1681 01:29:43.769 --> 01:29:46.076 One free pass. All right? 1682 01:29:48.077 --> 01:29:49.035 What's up, my n--