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Downloaded from
YTS.MX

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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

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Ladies and gentlemen, what a pleasure it
is to be here this evening.

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I'd like to take a second
to let you know...

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This is one of the most beautiful
audiences I ever seen in my goddamn life.

6
00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:56,598
You niggas came to see...

7
00:00:57,348 --> 00:00:59,017
When I say niggas...

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I mean all of us.

9
00:01:06,274 --> 00:01:08,151
White people,
y'all in the building this evening?

10
00:01:08,234 --> 00:01:11,112
-Make some noise, white people!

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Look at niggas shocked. "What?"

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And spread out, too.

13
00:01:17,660 --> 00:01:18,828
We got the best of the best.

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Where's my Hispanic family
in the building? Where's the Latinx?

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-A-ha!

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00:01:25,543 --> 00:01:27,045
A-ha!

17
00:01:30,423 --> 00:01:34,469
Well, you know there's a virus out there
that will kill a motherfucker.

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Got to be something special
to have me here.

19
00:01:38,348 --> 00:01:39,724
Let's see what it is.

20
00:01:40,975 --> 00:01:43,311
Where's the ladies in the building?
Make some noise.

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00:01:43,394 --> 00:01:45,396
-Ladies in the building!

22
00:01:45,480 --> 00:01:48,191
-Mm-hm!

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Did you smell that in there?
That was a lot of good uterus.

24
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Mm-hm. That was some high estrogen levels.

25
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I got the best audience.
And I had to have it.

26
00:02:03,206 --> 00:02:06,167
A pandemic made you restructure your life.

27
00:02:06,751 --> 00:02:08,378
You miss your family.

28
00:02:08,878 --> 00:02:10,964
Y'all are my motherfucking family.

29
00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:15,093
For the ten-year challenge,
I don't even recognize this shit.

30
00:02:15,176 --> 00:02:16,803
Is this the real world?

31
00:02:17,679 --> 00:02:20,265
This shit is crazy.
You don't know what to believe.

32
00:02:20,348 --> 00:02:23,601
Don't nobody even make up
conspiracy theories no more.

33
00:02:24,477 --> 00:02:27,021
The truth is fucked up enough.

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00:02:29,566 --> 00:02:30,984
For everybody.

35
00:02:31,484 --> 00:02:33,695
You don't know what the fuck to believe.

36
00:02:34,737 --> 00:02:39,159
Some of y'all in here
got three vaccinations and four boosters!

37
00:02:43,746 --> 00:02:48,835
And you just as scared of the next
variant as the next motherfucker.

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00:02:50,920 --> 00:02:52,463
We don't know what to believe.

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00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:57,302
Ten years ago, we even said we don't let
motherfuckers tell us what to do.

40
00:03:00,346 --> 00:03:05,184
We let them tell us, the worldwide doctors
told us to get the vaccine.

41
00:03:06,144 --> 00:03:10,690
These dirty sons of bitches,
they ain't showing us not nair a doctor.

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00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:16,029
I guess Dr. Fauci made all the vaccines.

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00:03:17,196 --> 00:03:19,032
He the only one we ever see!

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Don't get me wrong, I don't give a fuck.

45
00:03:23,995 --> 00:03:25,371
I don't mind taking the vaccine.

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When I take my dog to the vet,
I get whatever shots <i>he's </i>getting.

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He get a rabies shot, me too.
That's my friend, bitch.

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I'm as likely to bite somebody as he is.

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00:03:42,972 --> 00:03:45,266
Crazy world.
You don't know what to believe.

50
00:03:45,642 --> 00:03:48,478
The truth is just as strange as fiction.

51
00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:51,648
Taco Bell...

52
00:03:53,650 --> 00:03:55,360
selling chicken wings.

53
00:03:55,985 --> 00:03:58,863
This is a revelation, bitch!

54
00:03:59,572 --> 00:04:01,824
Crack you wide open
at the scene.

55
00:04:03,993 --> 00:04:07,330
Some of you niggas is tearing up
them pigeon winglets.

56
00:04:09,290 --> 00:04:11,251
Fucking up them Mac Tenders.

57
00:04:15,046 --> 00:04:16,881
You don't know what the fuck to believe.

58
00:04:23,137 --> 00:04:24,555
That's how it is.

59
00:04:25,139 --> 00:04:27,475
You may not know what to fucking believe.

60
00:04:27,725 --> 00:04:30,728
The truth can be stranger than fiction.
They won't tell you shit.

61
00:04:31,187 --> 00:04:34,565
They won't tell you that Wendy Williams
is Sasquatch.

62
00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:42,991
That bitch is Bigfoot!

63
00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:46,286
Every time you see her go on hiatus,

64
00:04:46,369 --> 00:04:49,122
that's when you start
seeing sightings of Bigfoot.

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00:04:52,041 --> 00:04:53,793
The truth will come out later. You'll see.

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00:04:56,587 --> 00:04:58,506
Just saying, they'll tell us anything.

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00:04:59,716 --> 00:05:01,926
That's why it's called World War III.

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00:05:02,510 --> 00:05:05,680
'Cause there's a whole motherfucking
war going on right now.

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00:05:06,556 --> 00:05:08,141
And they ain't telling us shit.

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00:05:08,891 --> 00:05:11,436
We don't even know whose side is what.

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Whole war going on.

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00:05:14,856 --> 00:05:18,568
Fortunately, for us, it's simple.
It ain't even complicated.

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00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:20,611
White people, don't get nervous.

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00:05:22,280 --> 00:05:24,157
It ain't about race this time.

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00:05:24,699 --> 00:05:27,535
Mm-mm. Ain't about money this time.

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No, no.

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00:05:30,121 --> 00:05:33,583
This time it's a lie versus the truth.

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00:05:34,250 --> 00:05:38,212
Just that simple.
A lie versus the truth. That's it.

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00:05:38,296 --> 00:05:41,591
Just a lie versus the truth. Ah!

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The lie...

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00:05:46,471 --> 00:05:48,556
I'm not here to say what side
is the best side.

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00:05:48,639 --> 00:05:50,349
I'm just saying, them's the sides.

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00:05:52,101 --> 00:05:55,480
Watch this. Where is all the lovers
of truth at in the building?

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00:05:55,563 --> 00:05:57,899
Make some noise
if you love the truth.

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00:05:59,233 --> 00:06:03,154
Whoo! Look at the lovers of truth.
Strong in this bitch.

86
00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:05,531
Keep that same energy.

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00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:08,493
Don't switch up on me.

88
00:06:09,744 --> 00:06:11,454
So, lovers of truth. Watch this.

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00:06:11,537 --> 00:06:14,582
Where's all the liars in the building?
Make some noise. Liars.

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00:06:15,249 --> 00:06:16,501
Yeah!

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00:06:16,584 --> 00:06:21,798
Look at the lovers of truth. "What?
I didn't think they would tell the truth."

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00:06:24,342 --> 00:06:26,385
Liars do what the fuck they want to do.

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00:06:27,136 --> 00:06:29,931
Just understand, there's two sides.

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00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:34,143
You always got to have a proper
respect for your opps.

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One of these sides don't respect the opps.

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The lovers of truth,
they don't give a fuck about the lie.

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00:06:43,653 --> 00:06:45,363
And they will tell you,

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"Bitch, this is the truth right here.
I don't give a fuck!"

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00:06:55,623 --> 00:06:58,334
You tell them about the lie.
The lie ain't shit.

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Shit.

101
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:01,963
Liars run the world.

102
00:07:02,922 --> 00:07:04,173
Better respect it.

103
00:07:04,590 --> 00:07:07,969
Liars run the world.
For every time one lie gets told,

104
00:07:08,052 --> 00:07:11,013
one million people
make one million dollars.

105
00:07:11,973 --> 00:07:14,267
For every lie,
you know who the fuck pays for it?

106
00:07:14,350 --> 00:07:18,646
Whoever the fuck don't know it's a lie.
That's who the fuck pays for it.

107
00:07:19,230 --> 00:07:22,733
Yep. And they lie to all of us.
Not some of us.

108
00:07:22,817 --> 00:07:24,986
Look at white people, "Not us." Yes.

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All of us.

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They lie to us all together.

111
00:07:32,368 --> 00:07:34,162
They told all of us in here.

112
00:07:35,163 --> 00:07:37,623
There's a chicken wing shortage.

113
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Look at people of all races and religions,
genders and creeds all agree.

114
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"They sure did say that."

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00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:54,724
They told all of us.

116
00:07:55,183 --> 00:07:57,393
There's a chicken wing shortage.

117
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Doesn't matter how much
we all love chicken.

118
00:08:04,609 --> 00:08:06,944
We didn't riot in the streets.

119
00:08:08,696 --> 00:08:11,657
We didn't burn burger places down.

120
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:14,827
We just believed them.

121
00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:20,291
But liars always leave a clue.

122
00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:25,922
They think they smarter than them is.

123
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They say it to all of us,
"There is a chicken wing shortage."

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Did you notice they did not say
it was a shortage of chickens?

125
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Said it was a chicken wing shortage.

126
00:08:56,118 --> 00:08:57,912
But they did not say...

127
00:08:59,455 --> 00:09:02,291
it was a shortage of chickens.

128
00:09:03,584 --> 00:09:06,629
Now, I know some of y'all
don't grow up on the farm.

129
00:09:07,713 --> 00:09:10,341
Maybe you don't see a chicken every day.

130
00:09:11,759 --> 00:09:17,723
But try to envision in your mind
what a chicken looks like.

131
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'Cause if a liar can get you
to believe some shit,

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they don't stop there. They double down.

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Just so you knew they was lying,
they said some shit next,

134
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that don't even make mathematical sense.

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They said there's
a chicken wing shortage...

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but we got plenty of thighs.

137
00:10:12,194 --> 00:10:15,573
Where the fuck would you get
plenty of thighs from, bitch?

138
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:18,117
Look, I'm not a farmer.

139
00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:21,621
Or a scientist. But I will tell you this,

140
00:10:22,330 --> 00:10:26,917
all chicken wings… come from a chicken.

141
00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:32,798
They get two wings, two thighs.

142
00:10:34,216 --> 00:10:36,969
So don't start talking about
you got a whole bunch of thighs.

143
00:10:39,972 --> 00:10:42,642
Where the fuck are you getting these
spider leg chickens from?

144
00:10:45,394 --> 00:10:49,023
See, the problem is,
some of y'all believe in God,

145
00:10:49,106 --> 00:10:50,858
some of y'all believe in science.

146
00:10:51,692 --> 00:10:53,027
I believe in both.

147
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Science might have done some things,
and God did some things.

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Science might have made a lot of shit,
but God made the chicken.

149
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You ain't going to tell me.
God made the chicken.

150
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He did that for the world.

151
00:11:12,213 --> 00:11:13,839
That's how you know it's from God.

152
00:11:13,964 --> 00:11:16,300
What group of people
don't fuck with chicken?

153
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:24,433
Look at the vegans. "Just us."

154
00:11:30,606 --> 00:11:31,941
God made the chicken.

155
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That bitch ain't safe nowhere.

156
00:11:36,612 --> 00:11:38,823
Every time a chicken's foot
hits the ground,

157
00:11:38,906 --> 00:11:41,450
somebody want to put that bitch in grease.

158
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In China, in France,
in Europe, in Mississippi.

159
00:11:52,670 --> 00:11:54,046
That's how you know God made it,

160
00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:56,465
because that bird is the most
delicious bird.

161
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,095
In the whole world!

162
00:12:02,763 --> 00:12:04,598
And that motherfucker can't fly.

163
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'Cause God loves you.

164
00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:13,023
If chickens could fly,
half the motherfuckers in here

165
00:12:13,107 --> 00:12:14,984
would be dead right now if you had to...

166
00:12:15,609 --> 00:12:18,529
if you had to catch your own two-piece,
you'll die.

167
00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:21,198
You just in the backyard...

168
00:12:24,743 --> 00:12:29,165
"That was a spicy combo, too.
I can't keep missing these opportunities."

169
00:12:34,420 --> 00:12:35,337
Anyway...

170
00:12:37,631 --> 00:12:39,758
I'm just saying,
figure out what you can trust.

171
00:12:40,634 --> 00:12:44,013
'Cause it used to be it was people
out there that we trusted.

172
00:12:44,680 --> 00:12:46,932
Their job made us trust them.

173
00:12:47,641 --> 00:12:50,186
That they would do the right thing by us.

174
00:12:50,895 --> 00:12:52,438
That shit is gone-gone.

175
00:12:53,439 --> 00:12:54,482
Been gone.

176
00:12:55,691 --> 00:12:56,817
What the fuck you mean?

177
00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:00,946
They want you to do shit
that don't make no sense.

178
00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:03,407
That's why I won't even talk
about politics no more.

179
00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:04,950
Ain't shit to talk about.

180
00:13:05,409 --> 00:13:09,330
What the fuck I'm supposed to do
if both sides is the dumb side?

181
00:13:11,207 --> 00:13:13,209
I don't even want to play no more!

182
00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:18,422
What the fuck is this shit?

183
00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:20,966
But that's America.

184
00:13:21,592 --> 00:13:23,636
We just don't want what we had last.

185
00:13:29,892 --> 00:13:33,521
Ten years ago, some of you ladies
was with a full-fledged gangbanger.

186
00:13:35,064 --> 00:13:37,983
Look at you ten years later
in here with that bank teller.

187
00:13:41,362 --> 00:13:43,197
You look like you work at the bank.

188
00:13:48,285 --> 00:13:49,662
That's how our country do.

189
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We don't give a fuck.
Just don't give us the last shit.

190
00:13:53,123 --> 00:13:59,004
We traded in a crazy,
deranged, erratic motherfucker.

191
00:13:59,672 --> 00:14:01,257
We traded him in

192
00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:04,093
for a <i>Weekend at Bernie's.</i>

193
00:14:17,982 --> 00:14:19,316
Too much going on.

194
00:14:20,401 --> 00:14:22,736
You can't believe nothing that people say.

195
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:25,614
This is some crazy shit.

196
00:14:26,198 --> 00:14:28,284
You motherfuckers is vicious.

197
00:14:28,784 --> 00:14:30,995
You don't give a fuck about nobody.

198
00:14:31,787 --> 00:14:35,624
Motherfucker, I'm so sick of motherfuckers
talking shit about Joe Biden.

199
00:14:36,250 --> 00:14:38,586
"Joe need to get his shit together."

200
00:14:40,504 --> 00:14:42,464
"You need to wake up, Joe."

201
00:14:45,676 --> 00:14:47,845
"Go Brandon, Joe."

202
00:14:51,056 --> 00:14:53,142
What the fuck is wrong with you people?

203
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:55,269
Who raised you?

204
00:14:57,438 --> 00:15:01,442
Joe Biden is 96 motherfucking
years old, bitch.

205
00:15:03,569 --> 00:15:06,280
You gave Paw Paw the job, bitch.

206
00:15:07,489 --> 00:15:11,452
You gave Great-Granddad
the job, bitch.

207
00:15:12,703 --> 00:15:16,081
Now, you want Big Daddy
to get his shit together.

208
00:15:18,083 --> 00:15:21,295
Joe Biden is doing the best
he motherfucking can.

209
00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:24,632
That man is 97 years old.

210
00:15:28,844 --> 00:15:31,347
People talking shit about Joe Biden.

211
00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:34,391
"I don't like the way
he left Afghanistan."

212
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:38,854
Bitch, how the fuck do you think
a 98-year-old man leave a fight?

213
00:15:41,815 --> 00:15:44,109
Quickly and quietly, I bet you.

214
00:15:46,654 --> 00:15:48,614
Joe Biden left Afghanistan like this.

215
00:15:58,332 --> 00:16:00,501
Joe is doing the best he fucking can.

216
00:16:01,835 --> 00:16:06,090
Give him a fucking break.
Joe is 99 goddamn years old.

217
00:16:11,220 --> 00:16:13,555
If you are lucky enough
to have a great-granddaddy,

218
00:16:13,639 --> 00:16:15,933
call him up right now
on the phone and ask him

219
00:16:16,016 --> 00:16:19,895
is he ready to do 12 press conferences
tomorrow, bitch.

220
00:16:20,562 --> 00:16:22,272
No, he is not.

221
00:16:28,153 --> 00:16:30,072
Joe be doing the best he can.

222
00:16:32,282 --> 00:16:34,451
He show up at all the press conferences.

223
00:16:35,536 --> 00:16:37,287
You can ask Joe anything.

224
00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:40,708
But he only going to answer half...

225
00:16:45,963 --> 00:16:47,381
of what the question is.

226
00:16:48,132 --> 00:16:52,970
He is not going to let you know
when he get off at the nearest exit.

227
00:16:54,805 --> 00:16:56,515
They said, "Joe...

228
00:16:58,267 --> 00:17:01,145
America just dealt
with a terrible hurricane season.

229
00:17:02,312 --> 00:17:06,859
Do you have some words of encouragement
for the American people about hurricanes?"

230
00:17:06,942 --> 00:17:08,193
Joe said...

231
00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:10,821
"Thank you so much for asking.

232
00:17:12,406 --> 00:17:15,075
First of all, our thoughts and prayers
go out to all the families

233
00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:18,120
dealing with hurricanes throughout
the entire United States.

234
00:17:18,620 --> 00:17:20,330
What a lot of Americans have been doing

235
00:17:20,414 --> 00:17:22,916
to fight the hurricanes
is getting vaccinated."

236
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:42,561
There's too much shit going on.

237
00:17:45,606 --> 00:17:48,317
Too much shit going on.

238
00:17:49,276 --> 00:17:51,070
They doing their best with Joe.

239
00:17:52,946 --> 00:17:55,115
Every morning, they tell Joe,
"Joe, today...

240
00:17:57,743 --> 00:17:59,244
Don't say shit today, Joe."

241
00:18:03,999 --> 00:18:06,001
"No, I want to tell the American people."

242
00:18:08,378 --> 00:18:10,422
I love it.

243
00:18:10,798 --> 00:18:13,842
And that's how you can tell
the Vice President is a real Black woman.

244
00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:18,972
You don't see her nowhere.

245
00:18:21,558 --> 00:18:25,729
She ain't at the mall,
at the club, nothing.

246
00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:28,023
She in her room at the White House.

247
00:18:37,199 --> 00:18:38,575
Too much shit going on.

248
00:18:40,327 --> 00:18:41,495
Too much shit.

249
00:18:42,329 --> 00:18:45,791
It all come down to the lie and the truth.

250
00:18:46,708 --> 00:18:48,001
Just got to deal with it.

251
00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:51,421
Them motherfuckers don't want to tell us
the truth about shit.

252
00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:53,132
Nothing.

253
00:18:54,174 --> 00:18:57,177
You notice they don't even talk
about the war on drugs no more?

254
00:18:58,887 --> 00:19:01,473
You think that's because
there ain't no more war?

255
00:19:02,850 --> 00:19:04,351
Or there ain't no more drugs?

256
00:19:09,148 --> 00:19:10,899
They don't tell us shit!

257
00:19:11,984 --> 00:19:14,361
They don't talk about drugs no more.

258
00:19:15,070 --> 00:19:16,655
'Cause for the first time in history...

259
00:19:17,865 --> 00:19:18,949
Black people...

260
00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:21,285
ain't making none of the drugs.

261
00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:24,788
Look at white people. "What?"

262
00:19:27,124 --> 00:19:27,958
Yep.

263
00:19:29,418 --> 00:19:30,752
Yep. I know, white people.

264
00:19:30,836 --> 00:19:32,713
You finding what I'm saying
hard to believe.

265
00:19:35,465 --> 00:19:38,552
I'ma tell you a statistic that's
gonna blow your fucking mind.

266
00:19:39,970 --> 00:19:41,889
There are zero niggas

267
00:19:43,140 --> 00:19:44,850
making Fentanyl.

268
00:19:54,776 --> 00:19:56,486
Look at white people. "What?"

269
00:19:58,739 --> 00:19:59,573
Yep.

270
00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:01,491
You better believe it, white people.

271
00:20:01,825 --> 00:20:04,953
We would notice if niggas
was dropping dead for nothing.

272
00:20:08,123 --> 00:20:11,043
I looked up Fentanyl.
That shit is beyond dangerous.

273
00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:15,631
I said, "What you got to do to die?"
They said, "Touch it."

274
00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:20,886
That's when I knew,
niggas ain't involved in this.

275
00:20:22,387 --> 00:20:24,556
We like to touch everything we buy.

276
00:20:25,390 --> 00:20:28,227
We would notice niggas dying
at the purchase.

277
00:20:32,356 --> 00:20:34,233
His last words were, "This must be it."

278
00:20:36,526 --> 00:20:39,613
Mm-hmm… Yep.

279
00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:42,074
It's a crazy world out there now.

280
00:20:42,699 --> 00:20:44,660
They don't want to talk to you
about drugs.

281
00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:47,287
They ain't talking
about the opioid crisis.

282
00:20:47,663 --> 00:20:49,915
And it's fucking up everybody's community.

283
00:20:50,457 --> 00:20:52,417
Everybody got a favorite pill.

284
00:20:54,711 --> 00:20:56,672
Everybody got a go-to…

285
00:20:58,757 --> 00:21:00,676
for when times get rough.

286
00:21:01,802 --> 00:21:04,346
There's a whole opioid crisis.
They ain't even talkin' about it.

287
00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:05,555
You know why?

288
00:21:05,889 --> 00:21:08,058
'Cause ain't nobody
going the fuck to jail.

289
00:21:08,809 --> 00:21:12,562
Ain't no houses getting raided.
Ain't nobody being looked into.

290
00:21:13,146 --> 00:21:17,150
You know why?
Because the dealer is your doctor.

291
00:21:20,529 --> 00:21:22,531
Look at niggas. "Dr. Fauci?"

292
00:21:23,865 --> 00:21:25,909
That is not your doctor, niggas.

293
00:21:27,286 --> 00:21:30,205
Stop putting him
on your insurance paperwork now.

294
00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:35,210
"He's the only one I trust."

295
00:21:39,089 --> 00:21:40,215
They don't tell us shit.

296
00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:42,551
If they really want to lie to us,

297
00:21:42,634 --> 00:21:44,428
they don't tell us
nothing about it at all.

298
00:21:46,388 --> 00:21:49,766
You notice they don't ever fucking tell
you where methamphetamines come from?

299
00:21:50,392 --> 00:21:52,686
They act like that shit come
from a trailer park.

300
00:21:54,187 --> 00:21:56,940
That's one of the strongest drugs
known to man.

301
00:21:57,024 --> 00:21:57,899
Amen.

302
00:21:57,983 --> 00:22:00,152
There ain't no other drug
make your teeth itch.

303
00:22:04,781 --> 00:22:07,284
Like bitch, I don't even think teeth itch.

304
00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:11,288
You're just scratching the shit
out of your mouth.

305
00:22:17,002 --> 00:22:18,337
They don't want you to know shit

306
00:22:19,254 --> 00:22:20,672
about motherfucking meth.

307
00:22:21,631 --> 00:22:25,427
Guess who the fuck discovered that shit
and was the first to distribute

308
00:22:25,510 --> 00:22:26,970
and manufacture it?

309
00:22:27,262 --> 00:22:29,556
Somebody we all motherfucking know, too.

310
00:22:30,348 --> 00:22:31,600
Adolf Hitler.

311
00:22:33,101 --> 00:22:33,935
What?

312
00:22:34,895 --> 00:22:37,105
How the fuck did they leave that
out of the book?

313
00:22:38,398 --> 00:22:45,238
They told us the Nazis
was the scariest military in the world.

314
00:22:46,948 --> 00:22:48,867
But they never told us why.

315
00:22:50,035 --> 00:22:52,079
They was not just making the meth,

316
00:22:53,080 --> 00:22:56,208
they rationing it to themselves.

317
00:22:57,209 --> 00:22:58,376
Every day.

318
00:22:59,586 --> 00:23:02,547
Putting it in chocolate,
and coffee, and tea.

319
00:23:04,174 --> 00:23:07,052
Fuck with the Nazis if you want to, bitch.

320
00:23:08,553 --> 00:23:11,890
Them motherfuckers
is the only military don't need to eat.

321
00:23:13,892 --> 00:23:14,976
Or sleep.

322
00:23:16,103 --> 00:23:19,606
As long as they got teeth to scratch.

323
00:23:24,694 --> 00:23:26,905
You fighting the Nazis, you look out,

324
00:23:27,781 --> 00:23:31,076
they are 750 miles away.

325
00:23:32,327 --> 00:23:35,539
We'll see them bitches in three days.

326
00:23:36,206 --> 00:23:37,749
And you go to sleep.

327
00:23:38,458 --> 00:23:42,254
When you wake up,
them bitches is in front of the house

328
00:23:43,380 --> 00:23:45,048
on the Ring cam.

329
00:23:57,310 --> 00:23:58,395
They don't tell us shit.

330
00:24:00,188 --> 00:24:01,398
They lie to all of us.

331
00:24:03,191 --> 00:24:07,320
They lie to us
'cause sometimes the truth is ugly.

332
00:24:07,696 --> 00:24:08,613
Yes!

333
00:24:08,697 --> 00:24:11,533
Sometimes the truth… is painful.

334
00:24:12,409 --> 00:24:15,495
But if you love the truth,
it's the motherfucking truth.

335
00:24:16,872 --> 00:24:18,540
But we all get lied to.

336
00:24:19,207 --> 00:24:21,334
Look at the Christians, "Not us."

337
00:24:25,046 --> 00:24:27,007
Yep. Y'all too.

338
00:24:29,134 --> 00:24:31,303
Used to be you could count on
the Christians

339
00:24:32,470 --> 00:24:34,598
to holler out a warning to your ass

340
00:24:35,807 --> 00:24:38,310
from time to time
that you ain't even ask for.

341
00:24:39,269 --> 00:24:40,645
They'll just throw it out there.

342
00:24:41,146 --> 00:24:42,439
"It's the last days!"

343
00:24:48,028 --> 00:24:50,071
Now, the Christians don't say nothing.

344
00:24:50,906 --> 00:24:53,158
Now that there's real plagues outside.

345
00:24:54,075 --> 00:24:57,120
The Christians going to church
on Sunday like Joe Biden.

346
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:06,087
But the truth is, all of us get lied to.

347
00:25:06,713 --> 00:25:07,964
Even the Christians.

348
00:25:08,757 --> 00:25:10,217
They'll lie to any of us.

349
00:25:10,300 --> 00:25:12,636
'Cause they just don't
want you to know the fucking truth

350
00:25:12,719 --> 00:25:14,763
'cause you might feel good
about yourself.

351
00:25:16,014 --> 00:25:17,140
It's only that,

352
00:25:17,849 --> 00:25:21,019
or they don't want to tell you
'cause they know it'll fuck you up.

353
00:25:22,187 --> 00:25:23,480
But it's the truth though.

354
00:25:24,105 --> 00:25:26,483
They made that whole Garden of Eden up.

355
00:25:28,568 --> 00:25:30,612
Putting slander on our Lord.

356
00:25:31,738 --> 00:25:33,615
Talking about an apple tree.

357
00:25:35,909 --> 00:25:37,786
Oh, and they ate the apple.

358
00:25:38,620 --> 00:25:41,873
Hey, bitch, my God don't fuck
with fruit like that.

359
00:25:41,957 --> 00:25:43,083
What the fuck?

360
00:25:43,833 --> 00:25:47,295
You act like God will put
our whole life on the line

361
00:25:48,338 --> 00:25:50,548
over a piece of fruit, bitch?

362
00:25:51,549 --> 00:25:53,593
If God didn't want you to eat the fruit,

363
00:25:55,178 --> 00:25:56,805
he wouldn't have made the fruit.

364
00:25:59,182 --> 00:26:02,686
They just covering up a lie.
'Cause the truth too painful.

365
00:26:03,103 --> 00:26:05,188
Ain't no motherfucking apple tree, bitch.

366
00:26:06,731 --> 00:26:08,608
You are the tree. This is the tree.

367
00:26:09,776 --> 00:26:12,070
You the tree, bitch. You are the tree.

368
00:26:12,153 --> 00:26:17,742
All right? So if you the tree,
then what the fuck… is the fruit?

369
00:26:19,494 --> 00:26:20,412
This is the fruit.

370
00:26:21,246 --> 00:26:22,372
If this is the tree...

371
00:26:23,623 --> 00:26:24,541
this is the fruit.

372
00:26:26,710 --> 00:26:27,961
The message was...

373
00:26:29,504 --> 00:26:30,797
don't touch the fruit.

374
00:26:36,970 --> 00:26:38,388
They lied to the Christians, too.

375
00:26:39,347 --> 00:26:41,933
Made up a bunch of religious stories
'cause they didn't want you

376
00:26:42,017 --> 00:26:44,102
to know the truth,
'cause the truth is painful.

377
00:26:44,519 --> 00:26:47,272
The truth is, your mama's a ho.

378
00:26:52,068 --> 00:26:54,654
Look at the Christians,
"That's far enough, Katt."

379
00:27:00,243 --> 00:27:01,119
Yep.

380
00:27:02,078 --> 00:27:04,205
That's the story of Genesis.

381
00:27:06,249 --> 00:27:07,459
Your mama's a ho.

382
00:27:08,460 --> 00:27:11,046
Look at you. Still don't even
want to believe me? "No!"

383
00:27:12,380 --> 00:27:14,841
Yep. You're talking about the lady that...

384
00:27:15,842 --> 00:27:17,927
fucked the man and the snake

385
00:27:19,054 --> 00:27:20,472
in front of God!

386
00:27:22,724 --> 00:27:24,642
This bitch was for the streets...

387
00:27:26,353 --> 00:27:29,689
5,000 years before they came up
with streets!

388
00:27:37,030 --> 00:27:39,240
But you believe the world is fucked up

389
00:27:39,908 --> 00:27:41,242
'cause of fruit.

390
00:27:41,743 --> 00:27:43,078
No, it ain't that.

391
00:27:44,537 --> 00:27:47,165
Adam was God's son.

392
00:27:48,208 --> 00:27:49,876
So who the fuck was Eve?

393
00:27:51,711 --> 00:27:54,297
That wasn't his motherfucking wife.
That wasn't his girlfriend.

394
00:27:54,381 --> 00:27:56,174
That was God's daughter, bitch.

395
00:27:57,342 --> 00:27:58,468
The fuck?

396
00:28:00,637 --> 00:28:02,514
That's incest, bitch.

397
00:28:04,099 --> 00:28:06,017
That shit cannot be fixed.

398
00:28:06,726 --> 00:28:09,979
That's why they ratchet ass
got thrown out the garden.

399
00:28:13,733 --> 00:28:16,486
There they got 'em as relationship goals.

400
00:28:23,159 --> 00:28:24,828
They're saying they lie to all of us.

401
00:28:25,578 --> 00:28:27,664
Don't want to tell us
nothing about nothing.

402
00:28:28,998 --> 00:28:33,420
We done been to 300 planets in space.
Three hundred!

403
00:28:34,254 --> 00:28:37,132
Earth, moon,

404
00:28:38,425 --> 00:28:39,926
plus 300!

405
00:28:43,012 --> 00:28:44,305
We done been there.

406
00:28:45,390 --> 00:28:48,560
Now, you notice they ain't never
bringing back no souvenirs?

407
00:28:53,481 --> 00:28:55,358
There's some shit
they don't want you to know.

408
00:28:57,110 --> 00:28:59,654
Down here on this planet,
we know all about evolution.

409
00:28:59,738 --> 00:29:02,157
Don't we know evolution?
We know exactly how it work.

410
00:29:02,240 --> 00:29:05,326
We know life will find a way.

411
00:29:06,077 --> 00:29:07,871
It'll start out small.

412
00:29:08,663 --> 00:29:13,334
And then, it just gets better,
and better, and better, and better.

413
00:29:13,752 --> 00:29:15,003
That's evolution.

414
00:29:15,795 --> 00:29:18,339
We done been to 300
motherfucking planets now.

415
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:20,175
And guess what?

416
00:29:20,759 --> 00:29:22,594
It ain't no evolution...

417
00:29:24,554 --> 00:29:27,640
...on not nair-one
of them goddamn planets!

418
00:29:28,933 --> 00:29:32,103
Not none. Not even a little,
teeny, "nichey" bit.

419
00:29:33,104 --> 00:29:34,856
Just rocks and dirt.

420
00:29:35,732 --> 00:29:37,650
Uh-huh. Every single planet.

421
00:29:38,234 --> 00:29:42,405
Uh-huh. 'Cause they found out the two most
valuable things in the universe.

422
00:29:42,822 --> 00:29:46,534
Other than God, it ain't but two things
valuable in the universe.

423
00:29:47,869 --> 00:29:48,787
Water.

424
00:29:49,954 --> 00:29:50,955
And pussy.

425
00:29:55,627 --> 00:29:57,629
Look at the ladies,
"I'm sitting on one of them."

426
00:29:59,547 --> 00:30:02,425
Look at the Vegas professionals,
"I'm sitting on both of them."

427
00:30:04,844 --> 00:30:07,305
Yeah. They don't want to tell you
that shit.

428
00:30:08,056 --> 00:30:10,058
Nothing else in the world means shit.

429
00:30:11,100 --> 00:30:14,437
Other than God, it's just water and pussy.

430
00:30:15,313 --> 00:30:17,690
Why? 'Cause science ain't make them.

431
00:30:18,399 --> 00:30:19,692
God made them.

432
00:30:20,443 --> 00:30:22,987
You know how you know God made water
and not science?

433
00:30:24,113 --> 00:30:28,243
Water is the only thing in the universe
you know the recipe...

434
00:30:29,369 --> 00:30:30,578
and you can't make none.

435
00:30:34,999 --> 00:30:37,877
"Say it one more time, Katt,
for the people in the back."

436
00:30:40,213 --> 00:30:41,047
Uh-huh.

437
00:30:42,507 --> 00:30:47,428
Anything else, you want to make it,
you just need the recipe.

438
00:30:48,513 --> 00:30:50,139
Soon as you get it,

439
00:30:50,557 --> 00:30:52,141
you can make you some.

440
00:30:53,351 --> 00:30:54,352
Not this, though.

441
00:30:54,894 --> 00:30:56,229
God made this.

442
00:30:56,437 --> 00:30:59,274
And we all know the recipe,
H to the 2 to the O.

443
00:30:59,357 --> 00:31:01,150
-Hey!

444
00:31:01,234 --> 00:31:03,903
If you put an H and an O together
by yourself,

445
00:31:04,988 --> 00:31:06,281
you'll just have a ho.

446
00:31:10,368 --> 00:31:13,162
Now, you can lead a ho to water,
but she ain't going to make none.

447
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:18,167
Yep.

448
00:31:18,710 --> 00:31:21,296
I don't give a fuck how good
at science you are.

449
00:31:22,297 --> 00:31:25,758
You can't take hydrogen,
and put that with oxygen,

450
00:31:26,009 --> 00:31:27,927
and come up with no type of water.

451
00:31:28,136 --> 00:31:33,683
Not tap water. Not rainwater.
Not Flint water. Nothing.

452
00:31:36,394 --> 00:31:37,562
That's 'cause God made it.

453
00:31:38,229 --> 00:31:40,732
It can do five or six things by itself.

454
00:31:41,357 --> 00:31:44,027
It can be ice. You can swim in it.

455
00:31:44,569 --> 00:31:47,238
Relax in it. Bathe in it.

456
00:31:48,239 --> 00:31:51,242
Swim in it. Drown in it. Die in it.

457
00:31:52,452 --> 00:31:55,204
Just like pussy.
That's why they both on the list.

458
00:31:57,832 --> 00:31:59,626
Water and pussy.

459
00:32:02,795 --> 00:32:05,214
-"Why are you saying pussy, Katt?"
-Why?

460
00:32:05,298 --> 00:32:06,424
'Cause it's…

461
00:32:07,508 --> 00:32:10,428
the second greatest thing
in the entire universe.

462
00:32:10,803 --> 00:32:16,017
It's something that exists
that mathematically should not exist!

463
00:32:17,143 --> 00:32:22,065
The pussy is a fax machine
before machines.

464
00:32:23,650 --> 00:32:26,819
You fuck me, I make a copy of you, nigga.

465
00:32:40,291 --> 00:32:41,376
And understand...

466
00:32:42,293 --> 00:32:47,674
women don't have magical,
supernatural powers of regrowth.

467
00:32:48,633 --> 00:32:51,970
If a woman cuts off her fingertip,
she can't grow it back.

468
00:32:52,845 --> 00:32:55,139
But she can grow a whole life...

469
00:32:57,058 --> 00:32:58,559
in her side job.

470
00:33:00,436 --> 00:33:04,107
And still deliver a delicious mango
for you to eat later.

471
00:33:07,235 --> 00:33:08,236
Shouldn't exist.

472
00:33:09,070 --> 00:33:10,363
But it does.

473
00:33:12,490 --> 00:33:15,827
They don't want to tell you that,
'cause you'd value it.

474
00:33:16,869 --> 00:33:19,706
I heard y'all men
under the sound of my voice.

475
00:33:20,873 --> 00:33:23,793
If you don't have a pussy, get you one.

476
00:33:26,254 --> 00:33:29,632
They are a valued commodity
in the universe.

477
00:33:33,136 --> 00:33:34,971
Look at some of the fellas, "I have two."

478
00:33:38,850 --> 00:33:40,768
Later, they'll call it investing.

479
00:33:44,689 --> 00:33:45,940
They don't tell us shit.

480
00:33:47,942 --> 00:33:50,069
They don't want you to know
you a superhero.

481
00:33:52,030 --> 00:33:54,782
Every last person
in here is a motherfucking superhero.

482
00:33:56,367 --> 00:33:58,244
I know it don't feel like it tonight.

483
00:33:58,953 --> 00:34:01,205
Two hundred motherfucking years from now,

484
00:34:01,289 --> 00:34:03,624
they going to be writing books
about all of y'all.

485
00:34:04,751 --> 00:34:09,047
The motherfucking group of motherfuckers
that did shit that cannot be done.

486
00:34:10,089 --> 00:34:13,384
These motherfuckers fought an opp
that cannot be fought.

487
00:34:14,385 --> 00:34:16,512
These motherfuckers' opp was air.

488
00:34:18,306 --> 00:34:19,891
They could die at any breath.

489
00:34:20,683 --> 00:34:23,061
They're going to be talking about y'all,
real superheroes,

490
00:34:23,144 --> 00:34:25,313
and it's that time
you can change your whole life

491
00:34:25,396 --> 00:34:26,898
if you don't like your life.

492
00:34:27,231 --> 00:34:30,693
You ain't never got to commit suicide.
You can just change, bitch.

493
00:34:31,694 --> 00:34:33,905
Ladies, if you don't like
the way you look,

494
00:34:34,197 --> 00:34:37,533
for $22,000 you can change that shit.

495
00:34:39,911 --> 00:34:42,789
You can go to the Dominican Republic
and come back,

496
00:34:42,872 --> 00:34:46,417
and nobody in your family
will recognize you, bitch.

497
00:34:52,965 --> 00:34:55,093
You just got to understand,
it's science,

498
00:34:55,593 --> 00:34:58,179
and it's God. Just don't ignore God.

499
00:34:59,764 --> 00:35:01,057
Don't overdo it.

500
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:04,268
God knows what's best for you.

501
00:35:05,686 --> 00:35:09,690
You don't know your spine is built
to take 90 pounds, ladies.

502
00:35:10,733 --> 00:35:14,487
Some of your spines say 90 pounds
at the bottom.

503
00:35:14,570 --> 00:35:17,323
God wrote, right there, 90 pounds.

504
00:35:17,865 --> 00:35:21,702
You done went to the Dominican Republic,
and got 72 pounds of titties,

505
00:35:23,079 --> 00:35:25,039
68 pounds of ass,

506
00:35:25,957 --> 00:35:28,584
and put it on that same stock frame.

507
00:35:30,086 --> 00:35:31,754
When you turn 55, bitch,

508
00:35:31,838 --> 00:35:34,507
you are going to fold up like a fan
at the nursing home.

509
00:35:45,101 --> 00:35:46,602
But you can be a superhero.

510
00:35:47,687 --> 00:35:49,981
Fellas, they got a trap out there
for us, too.

511
00:35:51,023 --> 00:35:53,526
Sometimes, Satan sounds
just like the Lord.

512
00:35:56,529 --> 00:35:58,030
If you five-foot,

513
00:35:59,657 --> 00:36:01,367
Satan set a trap out there.

514
00:36:02,285 --> 00:36:05,204
They got a surgery, five-foot men,
they got a surgery.

515
00:36:05,830 --> 00:36:07,540
Only take one night.

516
00:36:09,167 --> 00:36:11,419
It give you six inches of height

517
00:36:12,044 --> 00:36:13,212
overnight!

518
00:36:14,255 --> 00:36:17,300
-Look at the short niggas, "What?"

519
00:36:17,383 --> 00:36:18,759
That's right.

520
00:36:18,843 --> 00:36:21,470
Walk in that bitch 5'5", come out 6'1".

521
00:36:23,764 --> 00:36:24,807
I was tempted.

522
00:36:27,393 --> 00:36:29,604
You know how much
motherfucking money I got, bitch?

523
00:36:29,687 --> 00:36:31,397
I could be 7'3" right now.

524
00:36:33,274 --> 00:36:35,526
I'm talking to you niggas
like it's regular.

525
00:36:35,610 --> 00:36:37,111
I'm on my fourth procedure.

526
00:36:42,742 --> 00:36:44,076
But you got to trust God.

527
00:36:44,619 --> 00:36:46,829
Can't trust them science for everything.

528
00:36:48,206 --> 00:36:51,125
Yeah. Yeah.
As a fella, you going to look good,

529
00:36:52,376 --> 00:36:55,338
leaning on your car for six feet
for the first time.

530
00:36:57,965 --> 00:37:01,427
But eventually, some nigga's going
to ask you to do some nigga shit.

531
00:37:02,136 --> 00:37:06,307
And you are not going to be able
to do that shit with your scientific legs.

532
00:37:08,726 --> 00:37:11,520
So, this one nigga wanted to play
basketball, hit you with the...

533
00:37:13,314 --> 00:37:15,316
Their whole body
going to break down, nigga.

534
00:37:19,570 --> 00:37:22,823
Nigga, you know these are my new legs.
I got these this weekend.

535
00:37:22,907 --> 00:37:25,701
You niggas know I ain't took these
to the gym or nothing, nigga.

536
00:37:26,786 --> 00:37:28,704
Got two calves on each leg.

537
00:37:35,962 --> 00:37:38,047
Nobody can beat what God make.

538
00:37:38,464 --> 00:37:40,466
That's what makes pussy so delicious.

539
00:37:42,343 --> 00:37:44,553
Over the pandemic
I was able to explore pussies

540
00:37:44,637 --> 00:37:45,763
I had never even...

541
00:37:47,765 --> 00:37:50,726
I'd never even tried before.
Different flavors, and...

542
00:37:51,269 --> 00:37:54,689
varieties. Mm, mm… All delicious.

543
00:37:56,774 --> 00:37:57,942
I learned some shit.

544
00:37:58,651 --> 00:38:00,569
I learned I don't even have no preference.

545
00:38:00,945 --> 00:38:03,030
I just got two that I prefer...

546
00:38:04,407 --> 00:38:05,408
over the rest.

547
00:38:08,119 --> 00:38:10,705
But any 'gina is a good 'gina.

548
00:38:13,624 --> 00:38:17,086
Fellas, think about the worst piece
of pussy you ever come across.

549
00:38:17,795 --> 00:38:20,339
That vagina was worth four penises.

550
00:38:23,301 --> 00:38:24,802
Treasure your vaginas.

551
00:38:25,177 --> 00:38:26,345
They're collectibles.

552
00:38:28,514 --> 00:38:29,515
It's true!

553
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:32,310
My favorite type of all of them

554
00:38:32,977 --> 00:38:35,062
is, uh, the creamer.

555
00:38:36,939 --> 00:38:39,025
Ladies, don't do that.
Look at the creamers.

556
00:38:48,242 --> 00:38:49,785
Ain't nothing like the creamer.

557
00:38:50,369 --> 00:38:51,203
Whoo!

558
00:38:51,495 --> 00:38:54,749
Ladies, science has just found out
that scientifically,

559
00:38:55,750 --> 00:38:58,961
for every one drop of cream
your vagina produces,

560
00:38:59,628 --> 00:39:02,590
that is worth 32 extra strokes...

561
00:39:07,970 --> 00:39:09,972
…from your man at any time.

562
00:39:11,140 --> 00:39:15,353
As a man, we can be just ready to quit,
we just in the middle of the dismount.

563
00:39:15,436 --> 00:39:17,897
All right. That's about it.

564
00:39:20,816 --> 00:39:23,611
If you see one little piece of cream,

565
00:39:24,487 --> 00:39:26,447
it's a whole new game now!

566
00:39:27,740 --> 00:39:29,867
Now, motherfuckers
wanna be magicians now.

567
00:39:30,743 --> 00:39:34,538
There's the cream. Where's the cream?
There's the cream. Where's the cream?

568
00:39:34,622 --> 00:39:37,541
There's the cream.
Cream on a nigga, then. Cream on a nigga.

569
00:39:39,460 --> 00:39:40,544
Any cream.

570
00:39:42,088 --> 00:39:44,757
Ladies, when science finds out
what food...

571
00:39:48,427 --> 00:39:50,429
makes vagina creamy...

572
00:39:52,848 --> 00:39:54,934
that shit ain't going to stay
on the shelf.

573
00:39:55,518 --> 00:39:56,894
It's going to be gone!

574
00:39:57,770 --> 00:40:00,272
Look at the women
with the dry coochies trying to look at me

575
00:40:00,356 --> 00:40:02,108
like they know what I'm talking about.

576
00:40:08,906 --> 00:40:10,866
"Cream seems unsanitary."

577
00:40:13,619 --> 00:40:14,453
Whoo!

578
00:40:15,162 --> 00:40:17,206
Ain't nothing fucking
with that creamy, now.

579
00:40:18,207 --> 00:40:20,209
Only thing better than the creamy...

580
00:40:21,252 --> 00:40:22,503
is the squirter.

581
00:40:23,254 --> 00:40:25,089
Ladies, don't do that shit.

582
00:40:26,799 --> 00:40:33,639
No. Statistically, 65% of all men
have heard of a squirter.

583
00:40:34,890 --> 00:40:37,393
But they ain't never been squirted upon.

584
00:40:39,395 --> 00:40:42,940
So you ladies make that noise,
there goes men of all races doing...

585
00:40:49,405 --> 00:40:51,615
'Cause if you come to Vegas
and get a squirter,

586
00:40:51,699 --> 00:40:53,367
nigga, that's like winning the jackpot.

587
00:40:57,121 --> 00:41:00,040
Nothing is better than a squirter.

588
00:41:01,333 --> 00:41:02,960
Now, understand...

589
00:41:04,003 --> 00:41:06,922
as males, we never understood
the squirt, anyway.

590
00:41:08,883 --> 00:41:11,343
We always wondered why she wouldn't

591
00:41:12,428 --> 00:41:13,846
let us know…

592
00:41:14,722 --> 00:41:16,182
beforehand...

593
00:41:19,435 --> 00:41:21,228
that she's planning on squirting.

594
00:41:24,607 --> 00:41:26,817
Fellas, scientifically...

595
00:41:28,402 --> 00:41:32,281
I found out, women don't even know

596
00:41:33,491 --> 00:41:35,117
when they finna squirt.

597
00:41:38,287 --> 00:41:40,039
So now, it makes sense

598
00:41:40,998 --> 00:41:43,375
that they always look surprised

599
00:41:44,460 --> 00:41:46,212
when we look surprised.

600
00:41:50,716 --> 00:41:52,843
We always looking like, "Hey!"

601
00:41:53,260 --> 00:41:56,013
And they looking like,
"I cannot believe this.

602
00:41:56,514 --> 00:41:58,557
Well, I didn't think
I was this comfortable,

603
00:41:58,641 --> 00:42:00,601
but clearly, you're doing
something right."

604
00:42:02,144 --> 00:42:05,981
Ladies, if you could turn your head
like an owl...

605
00:42:07,441 --> 00:42:10,528
and look at your man back there
being squirted on,

606
00:42:10,611 --> 00:42:11,946
you would find out...

607
00:42:13,072 --> 00:42:15,115
that this is the greatest thing

608
00:42:16,242 --> 00:42:18,911
that can happen with a man and his penis.

609
00:42:19,537 --> 00:42:23,165
This is the standing ovation
of the vagina world.

610
00:42:24,500 --> 00:42:27,461
If you could just turn around
and see your man,

611
00:42:27,545 --> 00:42:31,590
he is back there looking like
a seven-year-old in a sprinkler system.

612
00:42:32,508 --> 00:42:35,678
He is happier than he has ever been
back there.

613
00:42:48,691 --> 00:42:49,984
Got to love a squirter.

614
00:42:51,151 --> 00:42:52,152
You got to love it.

615
00:42:52,861 --> 00:42:55,739
But now... everything God make...

616
00:42:56,782 --> 00:42:57,950
you can't overdo it.

617
00:42:59,285 --> 00:43:00,536
God made sugar.

618
00:43:01,370 --> 00:43:03,998
You eat too much sugar, you'll die.

619
00:43:05,958 --> 00:43:07,042
God made salt.

620
00:43:07,668 --> 00:43:12,798
You can love salt all you want to.
If you eat too much, you'll die.

621
00:43:13,799 --> 00:43:15,676
God put something in all the shit,

622
00:43:16,802 --> 00:43:18,053
even with squirt.

623
00:43:21,181 --> 00:43:24,476
If you had to go on a 100-city tour
and experiment,

624
00:43:25,477 --> 00:43:28,188
and you happen to run across
300 squirters,

625
00:43:30,441 --> 00:43:31,775
hypothetically...

626
00:43:36,947 --> 00:43:38,490
you'd find out something...

627
00:43:40,326 --> 00:43:41,493
very interesting.

628
00:43:42,703 --> 00:43:45,873
You'd find out for every drop of squirt,

629
00:43:46,999 --> 00:43:49,335
there is a small,

630
00:43:50,502 --> 00:43:52,671
"teenity"...

631
00:43:53,839 --> 00:43:55,883
itty-bitty...

632
00:43:56,675 --> 00:44:01,055
teeny-weeny percentage of pee…

633
00:44:04,391 --> 00:44:06,518
in all squirts. Not a lot of pee.

634
00:44:07,561 --> 00:44:09,480
Eleven percent. Not a lot of pee.

635
00:44:10,898 --> 00:44:11,982
Not a lot of pee.

636
00:44:12,066 --> 00:44:14,485
Just enough pee
for you to smell it one time...

637
00:44:16,487 --> 00:44:18,864
in the morning,
and then, never smell it again.

638
00:44:18,947 --> 00:44:20,783
-Just...

639
00:44:31,251 --> 00:44:32,086
It's true.

640
00:44:33,962 --> 00:44:37,007
All women are great women.

641
00:44:37,633 --> 00:44:38,801
Get yourself one.

642
00:44:39,593 --> 00:44:41,679
The pandemic taught me
there ain't no wrong one.

643
00:44:42,721 --> 00:44:45,683
All women is the right one.
Get yourself one.

644
00:44:47,226 --> 00:44:49,269
Get yourself a big girl,
if you got a choice.

645
00:44:50,854 --> 00:44:51,855
You need a big girl.

646
00:44:51,939 --> 00:44:54,608
I was in the pandemic.
I tried. I saw. I conquered.

647
00:44:54,692 --> 00:44:56,443
-I felt it. I know.

648
00:44:56,527 --> 00:44:59,154
If you want to go through a pandemic,
get you a big woman.

649
00:44:59,238 --> 00:45:02,157
It'll be the easiest pandemic you ever--

650
00:45:02,241 --> 00:45:03,659
You can trust a big woman.

651
00:45:03,742 --> 00:45:06,370
You don't even know,
you don't even know you hungry,

652
00:45:06,453 --> 00:45:07,788
and she already cooking.

653
00:45:11,250 --> 00:45:13,669
Your stomach look at her first,
"I think she got it."

654
00:45:16,130 --> 00:45:18,215
A big woman is perfect in the pandemic.

655
00:45:18,632 --> 00:45:20,092
She do everything right.

656
00:45:20,843 --> 00:45:23,846
If it's cold,
she'll heat up the whole room...

657
00:45:25,681 --> 00:45:27,391
cracking her legs one time.

658
00:45:29,726 --> 00:45:30,727
If it's too hot,

659
00:45:30,811 --> 00:45:34,064
she won't even touch you skin to skin,
she don't want it to stick.

660
00:45:36,608 --> 00:45:38,193
Fellas, you get with a big girl,

661
00:45:38,277 --> 00:45:41,196
you'll feel your body do some shit
you ain't never felt your body do,

662
00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:43,282
and your body
ain't never been trained to do.

663
00:45:43,866 --> 00:45:47,661
All you need to do is get a big enough
girl and you will feel your body nestle.

664
00:45:49,663 --> 00:45:51,123
Look at niggas, "What?"

665
00:45:53,709 --> 00:45:56,712
If you ever roll over on a woman
bigger than you, you just...

666
00:46:01,633 --> 00:46:04,887
It's the safest sleep you ever going
to have, nestled up there.

667
00:46:04,970 --> 00:46:06,180
I'm trying to tell you now.

668
00:46:09,016 --> 00:46:09,850
Yes.

669
00:46:11,477 --> 00:46:12,811
All the women is excited.

670
00:46:13,103 --> 00:46:14,313
I got me a short girl.

671
00:46:14,396 --> 00:46:16,690
I've never had a short girl before,
'cause I'm short.

672
00:46:17,399 --> 00:46:19,193
What the fuck would I be doing
with somebody short?

673
00:46:19,276 --> 00:46:20,986
But I was missing out.

674
00:46:21,069 --> 00:46:24,364
I didn't know they was that much fun.
I fucked a short girl in the car.

675
00:46:24,448 --> 00:46:29,411
This bitch was in every chair in the car,
and me and my dick never moved.

676
00:46:33,457 --> 00:46:35,334
She was just 'bout that life!

677
00:46:39,004 --> 00:46:40,255
I like a giant girl.

678
00:46:41,298 --> 00:46:43,008
No disrespect to the tall girls.

679
00:46:43,550 --> 00:46:45,802
I don't mean 5'9", 5'12", none of that.

680
00:46:46,512 --> 00:46:49,097
I'm talking about 6'4", 6'5", up.

681
00:46:49,765 --> 00:46:51,433
I'm talking about a giant woman.

682
00:46:52,643 --> 00:46:54,770
How big you want 'em, Katt? "Giant."

683
00:46:55,812 --> 00:46:59,316
I want her so big if she cooking breakfast
in the kitchen...

684
00:47:00,359 --> 00:47:01,902
in one of them summer dresses,

685
00:47:01,985 --> 00:47:04,696
I want to be able to slide up right
between the vagina

686
00:47:04,780 --> 00:47:06,323
without breaking a stride.

687
00:47:12,287 --> 00:47:14,706
Grab that clitoris like a red-nose pit.

688
00:47:25,509 --> 00:47:28,178
I like a woman so big
you got to fuck her in two rooms.

689
00:47:34,851 --> 00:47:37,104
That's why you got one of them WNBA girls.

690
00:47:37,854 --> 00:47:39,356
You fuck her in two rooms.

691
00:47:40,524 --> 00:47:43,485
I'm in the bedroom locked in for damage.

692
00:47:57,457 --> 00:48:00,919
Every 150 strokes I go check on her
in the living room.

693
00:48:04,339 --> 00:48:07,384
"How's that working out for you, baby?
Is that doing anything? How am I doing?

694
00:48:07,467 --> 00:48:10,095
Oh, I'm killing it?
I'm going to take it to the bridge, then.

695
00:48:10,178 --> 00:48:11,722
I'm going to take it to the bridge!

696
00:48:20,063 --> 00:48:21,189
Just saying, I like...

697
00:48:23,275 --> 00:48:24,610
I like all the girls.

698
00:48:26,069 --> 00:48:27,571
I ain't got no favorites.

699
00:48:29,072 --> 00:48:30,324
But I'll say this,

700
00:48:30,699 --> 00:48:33,118
there's some women
don't get their flowers at all.

701
00:48:33,452 --> 00:48:35,871
There's a group of women
around the whole world

702
00:48:36,371 --> 00:48:37,956
that nobody ever talks about.

703
00:48:38,457 --> 00:48:42,002
And they keep everything going.
And they'll never get no credit.

704
00:48:42,461 --> 00:48:45,422
We going to talk about them,
and give them their credit tonight.

705
00:48:47,132 --> 00:48:51,178
Where's all the fellas in here
with an ugly woman? Make some noise.

706
00:48:58,852 --> 00:49:01,438
Some people saw their whole marriage
go before their eyes.

707
00:49:04,483 --> 00:49:06,109
Katt, I trusted you!

708
00:49:09,821 --> 00:49:10,656
Look...

709
00:49:15,911 --> 00:49:18,830
Everybody in here
with somebody ugly know better.

710
00:49:18,914 --> 00:49:20,415
They just staring at me like this.

711
00:49:32,886 --> 00:49:33,720
No.

712
00:49:34,888 --> 00:49:36,640
You supposed to want what you need.

713
00:49:39,267 --> 00:49:40,811
You supposed to want what you need.

714
00:49:41,687 --> 00:49:44,106
When you was in the bathroom,
crying to the Lord...

715
00:49:48,568 --> 00:49:50,529
you said, "Send me the bitch I need!"

716
00:49:52,781 --> 00:49:54,574
That is the bitch you need.

717
00:49:56,201 --> 00:49:57,035
Yeah.

718
00:49:57,452 --> 00:49:59,830
Yeah. Stop judging people

719
00:50:01,456 --> 00:50:02,958
by the outside only.

720
00:50:03,500 --> 00:50:04,751
Fuck you mean?

721
00:50:05,168 --> 00:50:07,045
The ugliest people be pretty.

722
00:50:07,379 --> 00:50:08,755
They still ugly.

723
00:50:10,340 --> 00:50:13,552
Every man in here with an ugly woman
knows something the world don't know.

724
00:50:15,053 --> 00:50:16,930
She might be ugly to you...

725
00:50:18,515 --> 00:50:20,308
She ain't ugly to me.

726
00:50:21,643 --> 00:50:23,145
I ain't going to tell you why.

727
00:50:24,104 --> 00:50:25,814
But sometimes you need an ugly woman.

728
00:50:25,897 --> 00:50:28,608
An ugly woman will save
your motherfucking life.

729
00:50:33,947 --> 00:50:35,824
You can be famous being ugly.

730
00:50:39,035 --> 00:50:41,455
All of us know the story
of Harriet Tubman.

731
00:50:44,958 --> 00:50:47,502
They don't tell us but two things
about Harriet.

732
00:50:48,795 --> 00:50:52,841
They tell us that she freed the slaves...

733
00:50:54,134 --> 00:50:56,386
-and...
-And…

734
00:50:56,887 --> 00:50:58,096
…she was ugly.

735
00:51:04,352 --> 00:51:05,353
Give a fuck.

736
00:51:06,188 --> 00:51:07,314
It's the truth!

737
00:51:07,981 --> 00:51:10,692
It's what the fuck they say.
She freed the slaves.

738
00:51:11,526 --> 00:51:14,946
And... she was ugly.

739
00:51:16,865 --> 00:51:18,408
It's a motherfucking lie.

740
00:51:19,910 --> 00:51:22,996
Harriet... was motherfucking beautiful.

741
00:51:24,414 --> 00:51:27,626
Slavery was the ugly bitch.

742
00:51:31,338 --> 00:51:33,840
One more time for the people
in the back, Katt. I said...

743
00:51:35,383 --> 00:51:37,928
-Harriet was beautiful.

744
00:51:38,011 --> 00:51:40,639
Slavery was ugly.

745
00:51:41,556 --> 00:51:43,016
Uh-huh, uh-huh.

746
00:51:44,100 --> 00:51:45,769
And to free the slaves...

747
00:51:47,145 --> 00:51:49,064
Harriet needed to be ugly.

748
00:51:50,565 --> 00:51:52,192
'Cause the enemy was ugly.

749
00:51:54,486 --> 00:51:57,239
Harriet wasn't the only woman
out there freeing slaves.

750
00:51:57,948 --> 00:51:59,866
There was another woman
out there freeing slaves.

751
00:51:59,950 --> 00:52:01,201
Her name was Beulah.

752
00:52:03,286 --> 00:52:05,580
She was beautiful.
Looked like Tracee Ellis Ross.

753
00:52:05,664 --> 00:52:08,166
Light skin, hair down to her ass,
bubble butt,

754
00:52:08,250 --> 00:52:10,585
smelled like fruit and berries.
Everybody loved her.

755
00:52:12,212 --> 00:52:14,422
Thousands of slaves followed Beulah.

756
00:52:15,757 --> 00:52:18,969
But beautiful couldn't get you away
from being a slave.

757
00:52:19,052 --> 00:52:20,595
You needed ugly.

758
00:52:21,429 --> 00:52:25,267
'Cause your life was on the line, bitch.
This is real slavery.

759
00:52:26,268 --> 00:52:28,478
You in the real woods.

760
00:52:29,855 --> 00:52:31,606
This is really midnight.

761
00:52:36,444 --> 00:52:38,238
And if anybody see you...

762
00:52:39,155 --> 00:52:42,075
from an adult to a small child...

763
00:52:43,034 --> 00:52:45,203
your ass is dead, bitch.

764
00:52:46,454 --> 00:52:48,164
And you going through them woods.

765
00:52:58,425 --> 00:53:01,177
You hear them dogs coming from a distance.

766
00:53:04,347 --> 00:53:07,767
That's generally when niggas get scared,
start running, and get killed.

767
00:53:11,187 --> 00:53:13,690
But you ain't have to be scared
if you was with Harriet.

768
00:53:14,608 --> 00:53:18,403
Them dogs will come.

769
00:53:18,904 --> 00:53:22,699
And Harriet will get down
eye-to-eye with them dogs.

770
00:53:30,248 --> 00:53:32,292
Pull a pistol out of her panties.

771
00:53:33,084 --> 00:53:36,171
You just hear the dogs...

772
00:53:44,054 --> 00:53:45,722
A lot of people followed Beulah.

773
00:53:47,349 --> 00:53:48,433
She was beautiful.

774
00:53:49,476 --> 00:53:52,896
But that bitch didn't have the GPS
of a box of rocks.

775
00:53:55,190 --> 00:53:57,734
Three thousand slaves
followed that beautiful bitch,

776
00:53:57,817 --> 00:54:02,447
and wound up on their same master's
plantation at three in the afternoon.

777
00:54:07,202 --> 00:54:08,662
"Damn it, Beulah!"

778
00:54:16,753 --> 00:54:19,214
Just got to thank God for small blessings.

779
00:54:20,966 --> 00:54:22,217
I like all vaginas.

780
00:54:26,596 --> 00:54:28,264
But there's something about a big clit.

781
00:54:30,684 --> 00:54:32,644
Ladies, don't identify yourselves.

782
00:54:35,313 --> 00:54:37,399
I'm saying,
all clitorises are fine, but...

783
00:54:39,109 --> 00:54:40,610
something about that big clit.

784
00:54:41,403 --> 00:54:42,946
Fellas, if you in here...

785
00:54:44,614 --> 00:54:46,241
with Big Clit, I don't mean to be...

786
00:54:48,910 --> 00:54:50,286
…disrespectful or nothing.

787
00:54:50,370 --> 00:54:53,456
I'm not going to refer to it
as that anymore. I'm going to say...

788
00:54:54,582 --> 00:54:56,501
say there's a gentleman here
with B.C.

789
00:55:07,429 --> 00:55:09,347
Now, the fellas in here with Big Clit...

790
00:55:09,431 --> 00:55:11,850
-Can I raise my hand?
-Don't raise your hand, sir.

791
00:55:13,268 --> 00:55:14,936
He said, "Can I raise my hand?"

792
00:55:19,065 --> 00:55:23,570
Fellas, have you ever seen a clitoris
so big it shamed your penis?

793
00:55:25,280 --> 00:55:27,282
You just caught it at the wrong angle.

794
00:55:29,451 --> 00:55:32,454
Looked at that wrong.
Did that bitch have a hook in it?

795
00:55:36,666 --> 00:55:38,209
Some of the fellas are looking at me

796
00:55:38,293 --> 00:55:40,211
because you don't know
if your girl's clitoris is...

797
00:55:40,962 --> 00:55:43,798
big or... too big.

798
00:55:45,800 --> 00:55:47,052
But that ain't true.

799
00:55:47,677 --> 00:55:50,472
'Cause your body will let you know
if the clitoris is too big.

800
00:55:53,933 --> 00:55:57,020
Fellas, you know your relationship
with the vagina is a dance.

801
00:56:04,861 --> 00:56:07,906
You feel your body doing something
that's unnatural.

802
00:56:09,407 --> 00:56:10,784
That's a red flag.

803
00:56:11,659 --> 00:56:13,036
So if you eating the pussy,

804
00:56:13,119 --> 00:56:16,414
and you feel yourself doing something
you ain't never done while eating pussy...

805
00:56:17,040 --> 00:56:18,500
You feel yourself go...

806
00:56:25,924 --> 00:56:28,635
Abort mission!

807
00:56:28,718 --> 00:56:31,721
That's a dick-sucking move!
What was that?

808
00:56:32,430 --> 00:56:34,682
If you eating pussy,
and you feel yourself go...

809
00:56:38,603 --> 00:56:41,606
Fellas, you ever have to hold the clitoris
with both your fingers?

810
00:56:44,067 --> 00:56:45,860
You catch yourself in the mirror.

811
00:56:50,031 --> 00:56:52,283
I am sucking this bitch's penis.

812
00:57:03,002 --> 00:57:04,170
In conclusion...

813
00:57:08,633 --> 00:57:10,844
...there ain't nothing like that big clit,
'cause that...

814
00:57:10,969 --> 00:57:13,304
-Shut up!
-I won't shut up.

815
00:57:14,764 --> 00:57:16,641
You hear how that big clit just talk?

816
00:57:17,517 --> 00:57:18,601
Shut up!

817
00:57:21,229 --> 00:57:22,522
It'll be all right

818
00:57:22,605 --> 00:57:26,151
for us, fellas, when it first start.
But when it don't stop growing,

819
00:57:26,234 --> 00:57:28,319
we don't know what to do. So...

820
00:57:33,950 --> 00:57:36,286
You be thinking the clitoris
at its regular size...

821
00:57:37,454 --> 00:57:38,496
and you'll be licking,

822
00:57:38,580 --> 00:57:40,665
and that motherfucker swell up
in your mouth...

823
00:57:48,882 --> 00:57:52,760
Fellas, if you've ever licked up
under your woman's clitoris, it means.

824
00:57:53,636 --> 00:57:54,971
Thank y'all so much, Vegas.

825
00:57:55,054 --> 00:57:57,974
Have a good night, and God bless y'all.
I appreciate you.



