WEBVTT FILE
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Downloaded from
YTS.MX
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
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[cat purring]
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[meows]
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[curious music playing]
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[Terry on TV] But now,
put on your thinking caps.
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It's America's new favorite game show.
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[audience cheering, applauding]
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[Terry] It’s seven o’clock on a weeknight,
which can only mean one thing.
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It’s time for...
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- Can’t Stop the Quiz!
- [audience] Can’t Stop the Quiz!
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[Terry] I’m your host, Terry McTeer.
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[chuckles] Oh, my God!
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[gasps] You made out with David Zelman?
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[Anne's dad] You lost 600 dollars?
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- [Anne's mom speaking Cantonese]
- [Anne's dad speaking Korean]
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[in English] I want a divorce!
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- [door slamming]
- [Anne's mom shouts]
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- [shouting in Cantonese]
- [Terry in English] Welcome. Best of luck.
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May I have
five minutes on the clock, please?
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[audience cheering]
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["I Don't Feel Like Dancin'" playing]
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And your time starts now!
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Welcome!
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- Ready to learn and have some fun?
- [laughs]
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- Countries on the equator. Whoa!
- [bell dinging]
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Correct! Correct!
Wow! You guys are smart.
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Welcome, Ralph,
hope you're enjoying Los Angeles.
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Do me a favor,
don't miss the La Brea Tar Pits.
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They're lovely.
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[Anne's mom] Your cousin, Jin,
just got into Harvard Medical School!
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And you’re dropping out?
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It’s bad enough
you go to community college!
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I don’t need school!
I’m gonna be an actress.
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[Anne's mom] Oh! You’re making me crazy.
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- I’m going to the casino.
- [Jenny] Have fun losing all our money!
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That was incredible!
You almost knocked my bow tie off.
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- I would've felt quite nude.
- [chuckles]
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Don’t go anywhere.
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- I know I won’t.
- I know I won’t.
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[Terry] What an incredible game!
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I learned so much.
I had no idea pineapple is a berry.
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That blows my mind.
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Join us tomorrow for another night
of fast facts and live learning!
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I’m Terry McTeer and I’ll be right here.
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- [audience applauding]
- Have a good night!
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Thank you so much.
Have a great trip back to Delaware.
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I hear there's no sales tax there.
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- Wild stuff!
- [sighs]
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[keyboard clacking]
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♪ Even if I find nothin' better to do ♪
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♪ Don't feel like dancin', dancin' ♪
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♪ Why'd you pick a tune
when I'm not in the mood? ♪
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♪ Don't feel like dancin', dancin' ♪
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♪ I'd rather be home with the one
in the bed till dawn, with you... ♪
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[phone beeping]
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♪ So, I'll just pretend
that I know which way to bend ♪
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♪ And I'm gonna tell the whole world
that you're mine ♪
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♪ Just please understand
when I see you clap your hands ♪
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♪ If you stick around
I'm sure that I'll be fine... ♪
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[printer whirring]
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♪ But I don't feel like dancin' ♪
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- [song concludes]
- [coworkers] Surprise!
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[cheering, applauding]
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My God! I love that everybody's here.
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[coworker] Oh, we love you.
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Happy hour after this. Happy hour.
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- Yes!
- Yeah.
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[indistinct chatter]
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[Anne] Okay, let's get inside, get inside.
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[Francine] Anne? Anne, is that you?
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[Anne] Get inside.
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Anne, your stupid postman
has done it again.
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Once again, he's left one of your packages
in front of my door.
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Oh, man. Uh, my mistake.
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- [grunts]
- Yeah, well, what happens
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when there's an unexpected package
in front of my door?
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- I, um--
- I trip over it and I fall and I die.
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- Mm-hmm.
- Your stupid postman is trying to kill me.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.
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Please speak to him.
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[Anne] I'll leave him a voice mail.
Thank you.
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[snores]
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[gasps]
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Look, Linguini, it finally came.
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[Mr. Linguini snoring]
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[cellphone ringing]
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[Anne] Linguini!
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[Terry] It’s time for...
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- Can’t Stop the Quiz!
- [audience] Can’t Stop the Quiz!
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I’m your host, Terry McTeer.
Let’s meet tonight’s contestants!
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Starting with Linda,
who came all the way from Idaho.
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- Did you bring any potatoes?
- Uh...
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- I'm just kidding. [chuckles]
- [audience laughing]
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[Terry] And then we have
our returning champion,
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- Ron Heacock from Ohio.
- [audience applauding, cheering]
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[Terry] Ron, you must be getting
pretty comfortable here.
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You're now the third
longest-running champion.
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Congratulations!
That's quite an achievement.
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Uh, honestly,
I’m just glad to be here, Terry.
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- Uh, I’m a huge fan.
- [Terry] Oh!
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[audience] Aw!
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- Please let this be the night...
- [Terry] Last but not least,
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- we have Adrian.
- ...he finally loses. [sighs]
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Ron, your winning streak continues!
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[chuckles] Thank you.
But Linda, you did so great tonight.
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I... I wish we could both win.
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Hey! How about it, Terry?
Can there be two winners?
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[chuckles]
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Unfortunately, no, there can't be.
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Oh. Just me then.
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[exhales]
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[Trav] All I'm saying...
Okay, you put the money into the computer.
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It prints you the money back.
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- You don't lose any money.
- If you want me to invest in an app...
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- [cellphone ringing]
- ...I'm not gonna...
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[Trav] I sent this in an email.
Did you not read the email?
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- [Marge] I don't open those things.
- [Trav] You don't open my emails?
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- [Marge] Any emails, ever.
- Hi, Mom.
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[Shannon] Hi!
This is Shannon from Sunnyvale.
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I have some bad news.
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- [man snores]
- We lost your mom.
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What?
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[Shannon] Oh, my God. [laughs]
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Sorry, that was terrible phrasing.
I meant we don't know where she is.
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- [exhales deeply]
- Yes, she's not dead, but she is missing.
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Have you checked Rivers Casino?
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- Penny Palace, House of Slots?
- Yes, we checked all her usual spots.
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- Can you come in?
- [sighs] I mean...
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- [door chimes]
- [Walters whispers] Here she is.
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Uh. Ms. Yum,
thank you so much for coming in.
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Well, would you like to wait
for your sister?
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She’ll be here momentarily.
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My sister? You... you called Jenny?
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Well, when we lose someone,
we have to call everybody. [chuckles]
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- We didn’t lose her, she ran away.
- Oh! Right.
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It's okay. She does this sometimes.
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Due to the sheer number
of rules violations,
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we can no longer
keep your mother as a resident.
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So, you're kicking her out?
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- Enough is enough.
- It's enough.
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[Walters] Ms. Yum,
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in signing the resident agreement,
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- she agreed to adhere to our policies.
- [Jenny screams]
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[Walters] Sneaking out
is a very serious violation.
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- We can't be responsible for her safety.
- [indistinct screaming, yelling]
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She’s also really mean.
It's less important, but it’s not nothing.
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- [door thudding]
- Uh. I think your sister's here.
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- [cries] Hello! Annie! Annie, let me in!
- [Anne] The button! Push the button!
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- Hit the button. There's a button there.
- [yells] Annie! I can't hear you!
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- Hit the god--
- [Jenny] What?
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- [Anne] There's a... there's a button there.
- I can't see it!
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- [Anne] There's a...
- What button? What button?
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- [door chiming]
- [sighs]
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- Well, that wasn't very clear.
- Oh, well...
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[sobs] Annie! Annie,
it's finally happened.
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- Oh, my God, it's okay, it's okay.
- [Anne] No, no...
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I'm here. I'm here, we're together.
We're gonna get through this.
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- This is a part of life. [sobs]
- Jenny, what are you wearing?
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Oh, it's the only black dress I own.
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- Okay.
- I can't believe she's gone.
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- Mm-mm. No, she--
- [Jenny] Oh, my God.
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We're orphans.
Oh, my God. You're Orphan Annie.
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- Oh, my God.
- She's not dead. She ran away.
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- [exhales sharply]
- That fucking bitch.
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- Are you serious?
- Yes.
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- Hi.
- Hi.
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So, we took the liberty of packing up
your mother’s belongings.
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Thank you. What a pleasant eviction.
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Oh, good! I'm so glad. Oh? Great news!
It looks like your mom left a note.
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It’s mostly personal attacks on me.
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Oh, but it does say
she and Jeff are off to Macao.
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So, at least you know where she is!
[chuckles]
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- Who's Jeff?
- Who's Jeff?
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- [playful music playing]
- She has a boyfriend?
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I mean, why didn't she tell us?
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Because she only calls
when she needs money.
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[Jenny] Oh, you’re parked right by me!
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- [car trunk creaking]
- Are you living out of your car?
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No!
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It's just some stuff I've been meaning
to donate and... Oh, my God.
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This amazing lamp that I found in an alley
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and some... blankets,
in case I wanted a nap.
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Well...
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sorry, you wasted all your time
driving out here.
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Oh, actually...
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I was hoping that maybe I can stay
with you for a little bit.
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Why?
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Well, I thought I was going to
since Mom was dead.
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Come on, Annie.
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Come on, it's gonna be fun!
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- And I really wanna see my dog.
- Your dog?
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I made it to the final round of auditions
for The Real World!
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I have to go to L.A. tomorrow
to meet with the producers!
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- Oh, my God!
- But...
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- What about your puppy?
- [Jenny] Oh, yeah.
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Can you take care of Mr. Linguini?
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- [Terry] You added 2,500 dollars...
- [Jenny] Thanks! Thank you! [laughs]
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- ...and that's not nothing.
- [audience applauding]
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[exhales] You know, it feels smaller.
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- Are you sure you didn't make it smaller?
- No, I didn’t shrink my house.
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- Oh, my God!
- What?
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He's dead.
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No, he's sleeping! Mr. Linguini! Hey!
Psst, psst, psst.
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[farts]
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See? Full of life.
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[Mr. Linguini snoring]
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[Jenny] Shit!
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[grunts]
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[grunts, exhales sharply]
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- So, uh... how long you planning on staying?
- Oh, I don't know. A few days.
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Few days?
Don't they need you back at your... job?
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00:10:02.083 --> 00:10:03.458
Oh, no, I don't have a job.
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Okay, well, are you looking for a job?
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00:10:06.542 --> 00:10:10.125
I’m focusing all my energy
on manifesting the life I want.
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But what... [stammers]
What are you gonna do for money?
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Because I don't know
if I can lend you any more.
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And Mom's nursing home
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- isn't exactly--
- Okay, I don't need money.
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I'm getting plenty from my lawsuit.
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From your... From your what?
From your lawsuit? Sorry, what lawsuit?
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Oh, I didn't tell you? Oh, my God.
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I had a business lunch at Choochie's
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with this guy
who wanted to invest in my fashion line,
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and I took a bite of my tilapia filet,
and there was a fish bone in it.
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It got stuck in my throat,
and I almost choked to death.
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[chokes, grunts]
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So, I sued them.
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So, you sued Choochie’s
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because there was a fish bone
in your fish fillet?
231
00:10:46.958 --> 00:10:48.875
I'm sorry. I almost died.
232
00:10:48.875 --> 00:10:51.250
Why can't you just be happy
I got a bunch of money from them?
233
00:10:51.708 --> 00:10:53.917
I mean, who are you? Mr. Choochie's?
234
00:10:54.500 --> 00:10:56.583
Now, why would I be "Mr. Choochie's?"
235
00:10:56.708 --> 00:10:58.250
'Cause it's a man's world.
236
00:10:58.708 --> 00:11:01.500
[Mr. Linguini snores]
237
00:11:02.042 --> 00:11:06.000
Don't... Don't just leave
that hair there, please.
238
00:11:06.250 --> 00:11:07.250
Okay, Dad.
239
00:11:08.750 --> 00:11:10.917
[cellphone ringing]
240
00:11:11.375 --> 00:11:14.500
Oh, my God.
Do you have a Quiz alarm on your phone?
241
00:11:14.500 --> 00:11:17.417
- [audience applauding]
- Come on, Linguini! It's Quiz time.
242
00:11:17.417 --> 00:11:20.208
Let’s meet tonight's contestants.
Starting with our returning champion...
243
00:11:20.208 --> 00:11:21.292
Yeah, there you go.
244
00:11:21.292 --> 00:11:25.875
...Ron Heacock from-- [coughs]
Excuse me! From Ohio.
245
00:11:26.333 --> 00:11:28.833
- You okay, Terry?
- Yes. I just ate some crackers backstage.
246
00:11:28.958 --> 00:11:31.042
Must’ve gotten some crumbs
down the wrong pipe.
247
00:11:31.708 --> 00:11:33.500
- That’s live television for you.
- [audience laughing]
248
00:11:33.625 --> 00:11:35.958
Good. 'Cause I worry about you, Terry.
You work so hard.
249
00:11:35.958 --> 00:11:38.625
You should loosen up that bow tie.
Take a vacation.
250
00:11:38.625 --> 00:11:41.583
- Aww.
- Don't "aww" him. He's a jerk.
251
00:11:41.875 --> 00:11:44.500
But he seems so nice. And he's so smiley.
252
00:11:44.500 --> 00:11:45.667
He's not. It's an act.
253
00:11:45.875 --> 00:11:49.542
He's trying to be like Terry.
And look at how shiny his hands are.
254
00:11:49.542 --> 00:11:53.667
- He puts makeup on his hands.
- Some people have ugly hands.
255
00:11:53.792 --> 00:11:55.792
...all the way from Kentucky,
256
00:11:55.792 --> 00:11:58.542
Margret, I have to ask you,
did you ride your horse to the studio?
257
00:11:58.667 --> 00:11:59.667
[audience laughing]
258
00:11:59.667 --> 00:12:01.125
[chuckles] Welcome.
259
00:12:01.417 --> 00:12:04.000
And your time starts now.
260
00:12:04.000 --> 00:12:06.208
- What is the square root of 196?
- Fourteen.
261
00:12:06.208 --> 00:12:07.792
- [Terry] Ron? Correct.
- Fourteen.
262
00:12:08.000 --> 00:12:10.333
- How many hearts does an octopus have?
- Three.
263
00:12:10.333 --> 00:12:11.583
- [Terry] Ron? Correct.
- Three.
264
00:12:11.583 --> 00:12:13.792
- What?
- [Terry] What spice is derived
265
00:12:13.792 --> 00:12:15.417
from Crocus sativus?
266
00:12:15.542 --> 00:12:18.417
- Saffron.
- I feel like an answer hog. But saffron.
267
00:12:18.417 --> 00:12:19.583
[Terry] Correct.
268
00:12:19.583 --> 00:12:20.875
- Carbon dioxide.
- [Terry] Very good.
269
00:12:20.875 --> 00:12:22.667
- [Anne] Wellington, New Zealand.
- [Terry] Correct.
270
00:12:22.667 --> 00:12:24.042
Saturn. Our American Cousin.
271
00:12:24.167 --> 00:12:25.417
The equal sign.
272
00:12:25.417 --> 00:12:26.625
- Harry Potter.
- The Hobbit.
273
00:12:26.750 --> 00:12:29.542
- [Terry] Correct.
- All right. Bless you.
274
00:12:29.542 --> 00:12:32.833
Ron, please list for us
the gods of Mount Olympus.
275
00:12:33.250 --> 00:12:39.375
Aphrodite, Apollo, Ares, Artemis, Athena,
Demeter, Dionysus, Hephaestus, Her-- Hey!
276
00:12:39.542 --> 00:12:40.917
Why haven't you gone on that show?
277
00:12:41.208 --> 00:12:42.917
Are you scared that you would win
so much money
278
00:12:42.917 --> 00:12:44.375
that people will try and kill you for it?
279
00:12:44.500 --> 00:12:45.833
You know,
that's a thing with lottery winners.
280
00:12:46.292 --> 00:12:47.792
- No, it's not--
- [gasps] Are you scared
281
00:12:47.917 --> 00:12:50.667
that your hatred for that Ron guy
is actually a sexual attraction
282
00:12:50.667 --> 00:12:53.000
that you wouldn't know
how to navigate in person? [chuckles]
283
00:12:53.625 --> 00:12:54.750
No!
284
00:12:55.208 --> 00:12:59.042
It's just... I'm not... good at...
285
00:13:00.208 --> 00:13:02.250
being looked at, you know?
286
00:13:03.958 --> 00:13:06.000
It’s time for the Flip!
287
00:13:06.000 --> 00:13:08.542
- [audience] Ten, nine, eight...
- [scoffs] Stupid coin.
288
00:13:08.667 --> 00:13:11.708
- I love the coin. It's so big.
- ...seven, six, five,
289
00:13:12.167 --> 00:13:15.917
four, three, two, one.
290
00:13:16.250 --> 00:13:17.292
[audience cheering]
291
00:13:18.167 --> 00:13:19.417
- [audience] Show it!
- [Terry] Show it!
292
00:13:19.417 --> 00:13:23.375
- Show it.
- Our contestants will act out the answers
293
00:13:23.375 --> 00:13:25.083
while their partners guess.
294
00:13:26.083 --> 00:13:29.125
Wait, what are you doing?
The charades thing is the only fun part!
295
00:13:29.250 --> 00:13:31.375
It’s not fun, it’s a cheap gimmick.
296
00:13:31.917 --> 00:13:35.250
They changed the entire final round
to boost ratings, it's so dumb.
297
00:13:35.792 --> 00:13:37.875
Who wants to watch people
embarrass themselves?
298
00:13:38.750 --> 00:13:39.750
I do.
299
00:13:42.625 --> 00:13:44.167
Waltz. Waltzer.
300
00:13:44.333 --> 00:13:46.625
[laughs] Oh, my God. He's dancing.
301
00:13:46.625 --> 00:13:48.792
Sidewalk. Concrete.
302
00:13:49.917 --> 00:13:52.250
Waltzer. Concrete... Walter Cronkite.
303
00:13:52.250 --> 00:13:54.083
- [bell dinging]
- [audience applauding]
304
00:13:54.583 --> 00:13:55.833
Who's Walter Cronkite?
305
00:13:55.958 --> 00:13:57.583
[participant on TV] G. Dog.
306
00:14:07.417 --> 00:14:08.583
[groans]
307
00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:12.375
- ["Guerrilla" playing]
- [groans]
308
00:14:16.500 --> 00:14:18.917
♪ Okay ♪
309
00:14:19.667 --> 00:14:21.792
♪ Show up to the party it's guerrilla ♪
310
00:14:22.083 --> 00:14:24.833
♪ With an itty bitty chance
of having a good time ♪
311
00:14:24.958 --> 00:14:27.750
♪ Sip, sip, sippin' margaritas
spillin' like a villain... ♪
312
00:14:27.958 --> 00:14:29.083
It's like a robot's house.
313
00:14:29.208 --> 00:14:32.375
♪ Better whip out the swiffer
hiding my mind, smoke away depression ♪
314
00:14:32.375 --> 00:14:33.917
- ♪ Look like my exes ♪
- ♪ Hey ♪
315
00:14:34.417 --> 00:14:37.125
♪ They good, they tight ♪
316
00:14:37.250 --> 00:14:39.958
♪ They pull me under... ♪
317
00:14:41.500 --> 00:14:43.875
[Jenny] I focus
on my destiny all the time.
318
00:14:44.208 --> 00:14:47.250
I want to be rich and famous,
and loved by everybody. Why?
319
00:14:47.375 --> 00:14:51.750
Because I want to be a powerful force
for good in this world, you know?
320
00:14:52.250 --> 00:14:55.875
I just haven't found, you know,
the path to get there yet.
321
00:14:56.583 --> 00:14:58.250
I mean, do you have any idea
322
00:14:58.250 --> 00:15:00.875
how hard it is
to be an Asian woman in this country?
323
00:15:01.125 --> 00:15:04.417
- Yes, I read an article.
- Like, we have to keep going.
324
00:15:04.417 --> 00:15:07.042
Like, I've always wanted to open
my own bakery, you know?
325
00:15:07.042 --> 00:15:08.458
- And then life got in the way.
- Mm-hmm.
326
00:15:08.583 --> 00:15:10.250
And now, I never bake anymore,
327
00:15:10.375 --> 00:15:12.250
and I feel so unfulfilled.
328
00:15:13.042 --> 00:15:14.500
You need to change your life.
329
00:15:14.958 --> 00:15:18.208
You can because you're strong.
330
00:15:21.250 --> 00:15:22.875
So, are you done with your plate?
331
00:15:23.333 --> 00:15:25.250
- Oh, yeah.
- [chuckles]
332
00:15:25.958 --> 00:15:28.542
[laughs]
333
00:15:30.875 --> 00:15:33.708
Since when does it take you 20 minutes
to service one table?
334
00:15:33.708 --> 00:15:35.125
[Wendy] We started talking.
335
00:15:35.125 --> 00:15:38.167
- [Carl] You can't just sit and hang out.
- [Wendy] She believes in me, Carl.
336
00:15:38.750 --> 00:15:39.917
Oh, my God!
337
00:15:40.500 --> 00:15:41.500
Thanks!
338
00:15:49.917 --> 00:15:52.000
Hi. I had a huge day.
339
00:15:52.000 --> 00:15:54.375
- Why are you sitting out here?
- [Jenny] Oh, I locked myself out.
340
00:15:54.375 --> 00:15:57.792
- Well, let's get inside before--
- Anne, is this lunatic your sister?
341
00:15:57.792 --> 00:15:59.083
I told you.
342
00:15:59.083 --> 00:16:01.083
She threatened to call the cops
because she thought I was, what?
343
00:16:01.083 --> 00:16:03.042
- Was it loitering?
- You were loitering.
344
00:16:03.042 --> 00:16:05.333
I thought you were loitering
with an intent to murder.
345
00:16:05.333 --> 00:16:06.458
Oh, do I look like a murderer?
346
00:16:06.833 --> 00:16:08.917
- Yes. Well, yes, you do.
- [Jenny] Oh, really?
347
00:16:09.042 --> 00:16:12.208
- [Francine] I can see your brassiere.
- Okay, okay. I'm... I'm sorry about her.
348
00:16:12.458 --> 00:16:14.333
- Like--
- Sorry about me? What did I do?
349
00:16:14.333 --> 00:16:16.292
- Why are you-- Why?
- Put a sock in it.
350
00:16:16.625 --> 00:16:20.833
Okay, so, I went to go get coffee
and I met this woman.
351
00:16:20.833 --> 00:16:24.875
Oh, my God! She was so sad.
But we got to talking, and I helped her.
352
00:16:25.167 --> 00:16:27.292
And helping her made me feel better.
353
00:16:27.292 --> 00:16:29.917
And just like that, I saw it.
I saw the path forward.
354
00:16:30.458 --> 00:16:31.625
Don't move my stuff.
355
00:16:31.875 --> 00:16:33.875
Why do you have
a bobblehead of Justin Timberlake?
356
00:16:34.000 --> 00:16:36.708
It's Terry McTeer,
and it's limited edition.
357
00:16:36.708 --> 00:16:38.417
It’s from the 300th episode!
358
00:16:38.417 --> 00:16:41.958
Do you know the heated eBay war
I had to endure to get that?
359
00:16:42.125 --> 00:16:44.833
- [Jenny] It's Justin Timberlake.
- It's Terry McTeer.
360
00:16:45.042 --> 00:16:48.917
Okay, as I was saying, I have decided
361
00:16:49.208 --> 00:16:50.875
I am going to become...
362
00:16:51.625 --> 00:16:52.667
a life coach.
363
00:16:53.792 --> 00:16:57.583
- You know, like Oprah.
- [laughs] Oh, yeah. Yes. Linguini!
364
00:16:57.583 --> 00:17:00.250
- What's so funny? This is my destiny.
- [Anne] Oh, there you are.
365
00:17:00.417 --> 00:17:01.583
Yeah, you and your destinies.
366
00:17:01.583 --> 00:17:04.167
First, it was figure skating,
then it was acting, and then...
367
00:17:04.167 --> 00:17:05.917
And then you wanted to be a music icon.
368
00:17:05.917 --> 00:17:07.833
- And then it was fashion design.
- Yeah, but this is different.
369
00:17:08.000 --> 00:17:09.000
How?
370
00:17:09.333 --> 00:17:12.542
I'll show you, you know what?
Because you're gonna be my first project.
371
00:17:12.833 --> 00:17:14.208
I don't need a life coach.
372
00:17:14.208 --> 00:17:17.000
Uh, really? Because from what I can tell,
373
00:17:17.000 --> 00:17:21.167
you’re like a 28-year-old woman,
living the life of a 98-year-old widower.
374
00:17:21.500 --> 00:17:22.708
I'm 33.
375
00:17:23.208 --> 00:17:25.958
And why am I always a man
in your hypotheticals?
376
00:17:26.625 --> 00:17:27.667
Because men are worse.
377
00:17:27.667 --> 00:17:29.542
[Anne] Well,
I like my life just the way it is.
378
00:17:30.125 --> 00:17:35.125
Okay, Ron. Chuck has chosen geography.
Let's see what we have for you.
379
00:17:35.417 --> 00:17:36.792
- Please list for us...
- What are you doing?
380
00:17:37.083 --> 00:17:38.833
- [Terry] ...South American capital cities.
- Yoga.
381
00:17:39.292 --> 00:17:45.333
Buenos Aires, Lima, Sucre, Brasília,
Santiago, Bogotá, Quito, Caracas,
382
00:17:45.333 --> 00:17:48.458
- Montevideo, Asunción.
- Caracas...
383
00:17:50.542 --> 00:17:53.833
I knew I should have paid more attention
when I backpacked through South America
384
00:17:53.833 --> 00:17:55.750
- after I graduated law school.
- [audience laughing]
385
00:17:55.750 --> 00:17:57.167
Darn it.
386
00:17:57.167 --> 00:17:59.833
Let's see, Chuck, it's your turn.
How about language?
387
00:18:00.458 --> 00:18:04.917
[Terry] Chuck, please list for us
nouns that do not have a singular form.
388
00:18:05.125 --> 00:18:10.500
Scissors, clothes, pants, jeans, trousers,
shorts, tights, goggles, sunglasses,
389
00:18:10.500 --> 00:18:12.375
tweezers, belongings, boxers, briefs.
390
00:18:12.792 --> 00:18:15.292
North American river borders.
All right, okay.
391
00:18:15.292 --> 00:18:17.333
Detroit, Pine, Pigeon, Rainy.
392
00:18:17.333 --> 00:18:19.792
Saint Clair, Saint Croix, Saint Francis,
Saint Lawrence, Saint Mary's.
393
00:18:20.000 --> 00:18:24.417
Nucleus, nucleolus, mitochondria,
Golgi complex, cell membrane,
394
00:18:24.417 --> 00:18:26.458
nuclear envelope, cytoskeleton.
395
00:18:27.125 --> 00:18:28.208
[Ron groans]
396
00:18:28.625 --> 00:18:30.917
[Marge] Did you see it? I was like,
"Don't we work with that girl?"
397
00:18:31.042 --> 00:18:32.542
And I was like, "Oh, my God. Yes, I do."
398
00:18:32.542 --> 00:18:34.083
And then I was-- Oh, my God!
399
00:18:34.083 --> 00:18:37.542
- Hey, it's the Quiz Lady. [chuckles]
- What?
400
00:18:37.750 --> 00:18:41.083
You were like,
"Spain. Killer whale. Octagon." [chuckles]
401
00:18:41.208 --> 00:18:43.333
- So, what are you talking about?
- Hello!
402
00:18:43.333 --> 00:18:45.458
You're on the front page of Reddit.
Your video.
403
00:18:45.458 --> 00:18:47.250
[Anne] ...outskirts, premises, surroundings.
404
00:18:47.250 --> 00:18:49.125
[tense music playing]
405
00:18:53.833 --> 00:18:54.917
[Anne] Oh, no.
406
00:18:57.167 --> 00:18:59.500
Oh, Quiz Lady.
407
00:19:00.500 --> 00:19:01.792
Oh, my God.
408
00:19:02.583 --> 00:19:05.375
- ...lysosomes, ribosomes, nucleus...
- Oh, no.
409
00:19:06.375 --> 00:19:09.708
Yo, what up fam? As promised,
The Quiz Lady. [laughs]
410
00:19:09.833 --> 00:19:12.750
Yo, that video was so funny, dude.
I dropped my phone in the toilet.
411
00:19:13.042 --> 00:19:14.125
Don't worry, just pee.
412
00:19:14.250 --> 00:19:16.458
Can you give me, like,
a quick "wassup" to my followers?
413
00:19:16.625 --> 00:19:18.583
No! I need a minute.
414
00:19:23.625 --> 00:19:26.625
- Hi, have you seen Twitter?
- How did this happen?
415
00:19:26.833 --> 00:19:28.250
[Jenny] You are viral!
416
00:19:28.250 --> 00:19:29.375
I posted it last night,
417
00:19:29.375 --> 00:19:31.500
and then when I woke up
this morning it was everywhere.
418
00:19:31.750 --> 00:19:34.917
I mean, I have a ton of followers
from that time Elon Musk yelled at me.
419
00:19:34.917 --> 00:19:36.792
- But...
- Delete... Delete it right now.
420
00:19:36.917 --> 00:19:39.542
Wait! You cannot buy this hype.
Get this, get this!
421
00:19:39.542 --> 00:19:41.083
- Okay, the producers...
- I have to go.
422
00:19:42.542 --> 00:19:44.708
- I'm still here.
- She always does this.
423
00:19:44.708 --> 00:19:46.875
She just floats through life
without ever thinking
424
00:19:46.875 --> 00:19:48.458
about how her actions affect other people.
425
00:19:48.458 --> 00:19:51.417
Did you know that when were kids
we went to the Heinz Ketchup Museum,
426
00:19:51.417 --> 00:19:53.500
our father brought us there,
and she was furious
427
00:19:53.500 --> 00:19:55.958
'cause she wanted to watch Supercop 3,
and she'd just gotten it on DVD.
428
00:19:55.958 --> 00:19:58.375
And, so, she knocks over
an entire display of ketchup
429
00:19:58.375 --> 00:20:00.208
and we get thrown out onto the street
430
00:20:00.375 --> 00:20:02.125
by a Heinz ketchup security guard.
431
00:20:02.750 --> 00:20:04.625
And I really wanted
to learn about ketchup.
432
00:20:05.042 --> 00:20:06.292
I wanted to have that experience.
433
00:20:06.292 --> 00:20:08.250
I didn't get to have that experience.
Now, look at me now.
434
00:20:08.250 --> 00:20:09.375
I think it's just tomatoes, though.
435
00:20:09.375 --> 00:20:11.583
- You know, with sugar and spices.
- Oh, my God.
436
00:20:11.708 --> 00:20:13.125
They want me to be on local news.
437
00:20:13.250 --> 00:20:15.333
- [Trav] Dope!
- I don't want to be news.
438
00:20:15.625 --> 00:20:17.000
I would kill to be local news.
439
00:20:18.458 --> 00:20:19.625
Internal auditing.
440
00:20:19.625 --> 00:20:22.542
[Gerald] Quiz Lady! I'm a huge fan.
My name's Gerald.
441
00:20:22.542 --> 00:20:24.667
I'm what you might call a sexual cannibal.
442
00:20:25.417 --> 00:20:27.792
It is what you think it is,
and do you wanna get lunch?
443
00:20:27.792 --> 00:20:31.542
The internet knows where I work.
The internet knows where I work.
444
00:20:33.083 --> 00:20:35.083
[Anne through video]
Niagara, Detroit, Pine, Detroit...
445
00:20:35.083 --> 00:20:39.333
[overlapping video audio]
446
00:20:40.083 --> 00:20:41.917
- Hey, say something smart.
- Sorry. I can't.
447
00:20:41.917 --> 00:20:43.083
Come on!
448
00:20:43.083 --> 00:20:44.792
[overlapping video audio continues]
449
00:20:50.958 --> 00:20:51.958
[Ken] Anne Yum.
450
00:20:53.167 --> 00:20:54.542
I didn't mean to startle you.
451
00:20:54.708 --> 00:20:57.125
I'm a friend of your mom's.
Do you know where she is?
452
00:20:57.458 --> 00:20:58.708
No, sorry.
453
00:20:58.708 --> 00:21:01.250
[Ken] You sure?
'Cause I'd really like to find her.
454
00:21:01.375 --> 00:21:02.708
She owes me some money.
455
00:21:04.583 --> 00:21:06.042
She-- She said she quit.
456
00:21:06.583 --> 00:21:09.750
Aside from occasional penny slots.
How much does she owe?
457
00:21:09.875 --> 00:21:12.000
- Eighty grand.
- Eighty grand?
458
00:21:12.125 --> 00:21:13.417
And imagine my pleasant surprise
459
00:21:13.417 --> 00:21:16.042
when her daughter
with the goofy little bangs became famous.
460
00:21:16.292 --> 00:21:18.375
Saved me all the trouble
of tracking you down.
461
00:21:18.667 --> 00:21:19.792
So, where is she?
462
00:21:23.292 --> 00:21:26.542
Do you really want to protect her?
You probably don't even like her.
463
00:21:26.542 --> 00:21:28.292
I know I don't. [chuckles]
464
00:21:28.500 --> 00:21:30.458
Come on, don't be stupid.
465
00:21:31.292 --> 00:21:32.458
Tell me where she is.
466
00:21:35.458 --> 00:21:36.458
Macao.
467
00:21:37.375 --> 00:21:39.208
- Macao.
- I can't help you.
468
00:21:39.208 --> 00:21:41.917
Of course, you can.
You can cover her debt.
469
00:21:42.250 --> 00:21:44.125
I don't have 80,000 dollars.
470
00:21:44.125 --> 00:21:46.542
Neither do I, and that's the problem.
471
00:21:48.625 --> 00:21:49.750
Call me when you have it...
472
00:21:50.458 --> 00:21:51.917
and you'll get your dog back.
473
00:21:52.042 --> 00:21:53.458
- [car engine revving]
- ["More" playing over radio]
474
00:21:53.625 --> 00:21:54.708
[Anne] My dog?
475
00:21:56.000 --> 00:21:58.458
- My dog?
- You have two weeks.
476
00:21:59.208 --> 00:22:01.625
After that, you'll never see him again.
477
00:22:02.542 --> 00:22:04.000
Let's go grab some cronuts.
478
00:22:06.417 --> 00:22:08.958
- Amazing! We'll be there, thank you.
- [tense music playing]
479
00:22:13.708 --> 00:22:14.875
[Anne] Linguini!
480
00:22:16.583 --> 00:22:19.708
- [Jenny] Annie, what's going on?
- [Anne] Linguini!
481
00:22:19.708 --> 00:22:21.125
[tense music concluding]
482
00:22:25.792 --> 00:22:27.375
Who's even named Ken anymore?
483
00:22:27.583 --> 00:22:30.500
This is all your fault.
He found me because of your stupid video.
484
00:22:32.583 --> 00:22:34.542
- Are you calling him?
- I'm calling Mom.
485
00:22:35.167 --> 00:22:36.542
It's not gonna do anything.
486
00:22:36.667 --> 00:22:38.208
- [cellphone dinging]
- [Crystal over cellphone] Jenny?
487
00:22:38.208 --> 00:22:40.000
You left us with an 80,000 dollars debt?
488
00:22:40.250 --> 00:22:41.917
[Crystal] It's okay, I'm in Macao.
489
00:22:42.083 --> 00:22:44.500
Jeff, get me another Mai Tai!
490
00:22:44.750 --> 00:22:47.458
Okay, you know what?
It's not okay. None of this is okay.
491
00:22:47.625 --> 00:22:50.208
Your bookie threatened Annie
and kidnapped my dog.
492
00:22:50.417 --> 00:22:51.417
He's not your dog.
493
00:22:51.750 --> 00:22:52.792
[Crystal] Not a bad deal.
494
00:22:52.917 --> 00:22:55.417
- That dog's so old.
- [Jenny] That's not the point!
495
00:22:55.417 --> 00:22:58.292
[Crystal] What do you expect me
to do about it? I'm in Macao!
496
00:22:58.292 --> 00:23:01.292
[Jenny] You need to fix it.
We can't afford to pay them off!
497
00:23:01.292 --> 00:23:05.167
[Crystal] Fine! Come to Macao.
Jeff rented a condo. But no free rides.
498
00:23:05.292 --> 00:23:07.333
We don't wanna live in your goddamn condo.
499
00:23:07.542 --> 00:23:09.750
[Crystal] Don't swear.
Aiya, who raised you?
500
00:23:09.958 --> 00:23:11.083
Nobody!
501
00:23:11.667 --> 00:23:12.875
[glass shattering]
502
00:23:14.083 --> 00:23:17.542
- Told you.
- [breathes heavily]
503
00:23:19.042 --> 00:23:22.000
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
- What? What? Are they here?
504
00:23:22.167 --> 00:23:25.083
Annie, Annie, Annie!
This is all connected.
505
00:23:25.667 --> 00:23:27.167
This is synergy from the universe.
506
00:23:27.458 --> 00:23:29.625
Oh, my God.
I think I might have manifested this.
507
00:23:31.250 --> 00:23:33.083
I hate all the words you just used.
508
00:23:33.083 --> 00:23:35.208
Oh, my God.
This is how you're gonna make the money.
509
00:23:35.208 --> 00:23:38.250
Okay, someone from the Quiz just called.
They saw your video.
510
00:23:38.458 --> 00:23:42.042
What? No! No! That is so embarrassing.
511
00:23:42.042 --> 00:23:44.125
No, no, no, no.
No, see, they loved it,
512
00:23:44.125 --> 00:23:46.458
and they're in the middle
of a casting round,
513
00:23:46.458 --> 00:23:47.833
and they want-- No, come on.
514
00:23:47.833 --> 00:23:50.875
They want you to come
to the in-person regional auditions
515
00:23:50.875 --> 00:23:53.333
this weekend. Where? In Philadelphia!
516
00:23:53.333 --> 00:23:55.958
- No, that's not happening.
- Oh, my God. Why not?
517
00:23:55.958 --> 00:23:58.167
I mean, you could win
80,000 dollars just like that.
518
00:23:58.167 --> 00:23:59.708
I mean, you got every question right.
519
00:23:59.708 --> 00:24:02.750
I can't play on live TV
in front of millions of people.
520
00:24:02.750 --> 00:24:04.542
In front of Terry-freakin' McTeer.
521
00:24:05.583 --> 00:24:08.292
I can't, I can't.
There has to be another way.
522
00:24:10.792 --> 00:24:13.458
You could sell your eggs.
I mean, it's not like you're using them.
523
00:24:14.125 --> 00:24:16.500
- I'm not gonna sell my eggs.
- Okay!
524
00:24:18.292 --> 00:24:21.000
Well, I am not gonna let
Mom's bullshit ruin your life.
525
00:24:21.750 --> 00:24:24.042
- Too late.
- [melancholy music playing]
526
00:24:29.667 --> 00:24:31.042
[Anne] So, I looked on CarMax,
527
00:24:31.167 --> 00:24:34.750
and it said I could easily sell my car
for around 20,000...
528
00:24:36.750 --> 00:24:38.875
[door knocking, lock clicking]
529
00:24:39.458 --> 00:24:40.500
[lock clicking]
530
00:24:41.208 --> 00:24:42.833
[melancholy music concludes]
531
00:24:43.167 --> 00:24:47.333
Hi. The paperboy
missed the porch again, but by a mile.
532
00:24:47.458 --> 00:24:49.625
I mean, he threw it
in the driveway, the jerk.
533
00:24:50.042 --> 00:24:51.833
I'm pretty sure he's vaping drugs again.
534
00:24:52.542 --> 00:24:53.958
Bending over that far,
535
00:24:54.083 --> 00:24:58.167
it’s actually dangerous
for an almost ghost like me.
536
00:24:58.875 --> 00:24:59.917
Could you help?
537
00:25:01.458 --> 00:25:04.292
Oh, say, uh,
can I borrow your phone a sec?
538
00:25:05.000 --> 00:25:06.917
I just want to check on my stocks.
539
00:25:08.458 --> 00:25:12.292
- Is everything all right? You seem weird.
- What do you mean? I’m fine.
540
00:25:13.583 --> 00:25:16.292
- Since when do you invest?
- [Francine] What's it to you?
541
00:25:17.167 --> 00:25:18.292
Don’t be scared! It’s me!
542
00:25:18.583 --> 00:25:21.625
[Anne] What? [yells, grunts]
What the... Jenny, not again!
543
00:25:21.750 --> 00:25:23.417
[Jenny] Don't worry!
We're getting your dog back!
544
00:25:23.417 --> 00:25:24.958
Hey!
545
00:25:25.250 --> 00:25:27.542
- What are you doing?
- I’m taking you to Philadelphia!
546
00:25:27.542 --> 00:25:29.375
- So, you can get on the show!
- [Anne] Jenny!
547
00:25:29.375 --> 00:25:30.750
[Francine] Okay!
548
00:25:30.750 --> 00:25:31.875
Where's my 100 bucks?
549
00:25:31.875 --> 00:25:33.500
Thanks. Um, sorry,
I don't have any cash on me.
550
00:25:33.500 --> 00:25:34.958
[Anne] Hey! How could you do this to me
551
00:25:34.958 --> 00:25:37.208
when I was just threatened
by a genuine Tong?
552
00:25:37.333 --> 00:25:39.083
That’s why I yelled,
“Don't be scared. It’s me!”
553
00:25:39.083 --> 00:25:40.667
- [Anne] Jenny!
- What is a Tong?
554
00:25:41.167 --> 00:25:43.208
Asian gangsters. You know, read a book.
555
00:25:43.333 --> 00:25:44.500
- [Anne] Jenny!
- Thank you very much.
556
00:25:44.500 --> 00:25:49.292
[Anne] Jenny, let me out of here.
Francine! Francine, please!
557
00:25:49.292 --> 00:25:50.375
Grifter!
558
00:25:52.208 --> 00:25:55.417
[Anne] Jenny! Let me out!
I will call the FBI!
559
00:25:55.417 --> 00:25:57.667
- Settle down!
- [Anne] You want me to settle down?
560
00:25:57.667 --> 00:26:00.083
- You kidnapped me!
- Oh, don’t be so dramatic!
561
00:26:00.083 --> 00:26:02.125
- [Anne] Jenny, Jenny--
- I put a bunch of, like, snacks
562
00:26:02.125 --> 00:26:04.417
and pillows in there,
so just sit back, relax.
563
00:26:04.417 --> 00:26:06.458
- Enjoy the ride.
- [Anne] Jenny, Jenny.
564
00:26:06.958 --> 00:26:08.375
- ["My Own Worst Enemy" playing]
- [cheers]
565
00:26:08.500 --> 00:26:11.667
♪ Surprise to me
I am my own worst enemy... ♪
566
00:26:11.917 --> 00:26:13.042
[cheers]
567
00:26:13.042 --> 00:26:15.917
♪ ...Every now and then
I kick the living shit out of me... ♪
568
00:26:15.917 --> 00:26:17.125
- [Anne yells]
- Oh, my God!
569
00:26:17.667 --> 00:26:19.417
- Jenny!
- What are you doing?
570
00:26:19.750 --> 00:26:22.042
- Pull over.
- Never! [screams]
571
00:26:22.250 --> 00:26:24.500
[tires screech]
572
00:26:24.792 --> 00:26:26.000
Ow, ow, ow, ow! Stop!
573
00:26:27.125 --> 00:26:31.083
- Get back in the trunk!
- Look out! It’s dangerous! Look out!
574
00:26:31.542 --> 00:26:33.750
- [both scream]
- [car horn honking]
575
00:26:34.750 --> 00:26:36.042
["My Own Worst Enemy" concludes]
576
00:26:36.750 --> 00:26:38.500
[pants]
577
00:26:38.875 --> 00:26:40.833
- Oh, God! Oh, God!
- What the...
578
00:26:41.792 --> 00:26:42.875
[driver] Learn how to drive!
579
00:26:43.833 --> 00:26:44.833
Racist!
580
00:26:50.750 --> 00:26:52.500
Oh, hi!
581
00:26:56.250 --> 00:26:58.625
["Quiet on Set" playing]
582
00:26:58.875 --> 00:27:00.208
- [Jenny] That was crazy!
- [Anne] Jenny!
583
00:27:00.333 --> 00:27:01.500
- What?
- Give me the keys!
584
00:27:01.667 --> 00:27:03.292
- No!
- What?
585
00:27:03.292 --> 00:27:05.333
- Come on!
- No! No. No, no, no.
586
00:27:05.333 --> 00:27:07.375
- [Anne] You wanna run now?
- [Jenny] I would outrun you! I ran track!
587
00:27:07.375 --> 00:27:09.917
- [Anne] What? You didn’t run track!
- I signed up for it!
588
00:27:10.500 --> 00:27:12.333
- [Anne] Not going to--
- No, no, no, no, no, no!
589
00:27:12.333 --> 00:27:13.417
No, no, no, no!
590
00:27:13.417 --> 00:27:14.708
[Anne] Thought I couldn't outrun you.
591
00:27:14.833 --> 00:27:16.625
- What are you--
- Stop it! Stop! Stop!
592
00:27:17.167 --> 00:27:20.208
♪ ...The work be killin' me dead, stuntin' ♪
593
00:27:20.792 --> 00:27:22.167
♪ Killin' me, killin' me, killin' me... ♪
594
00:27:22.292 --> 00:27:23.750
- [Anne] Jen! [grunts]
- [Jenny screams]
595
00:27:24.208 --> 00:27:26.375
You are going to Philadelphia!
596
00:27:26.500 --> 00:27:27.625
What? [grunts]
597
00:27:28.000 --> 00:27:30.917
I don't have time for this,
Linguini is in danger.
598
00:27:31.042 --> 00:27:33.500
That stupid show is the only way
we're gonna get him back.
599
00:27:33.792 --> 00:27:35.500
What about the Choochie’s money?
600
00:27:35.625 --> 00:27:37.125
[pants]
601
00:27:38.000 --> 00:27:39.417
There’s no Choochie’s money.
602
00:27:41.417 --> 00:27:43.333
Of course. Of course.
603
00:27:44.042 --> 00:27:46.208
Why would I ever think
that you could help?
604
00:27:50.792 --> 00:27:51.792
Look...
605
00:27:53.167 --> 00:27:57.083
the Quiz is the best and fastest option
for us to get the money.
606
00:27:57.083 --> 00:28:00.667
So, unless you want to sell your eggs,
we need to get to Philadelphia.
607
00:28:04.167 --> 00:28:06.042
["Eye of the Tiger" playing]
608
00:28:06.333 --> 00:28:09.208
- Fine. But I'm driving.
- Okay.
609
00:28:10.125 --> 00:28:11.333
Give me back my hair.
610
00:28:19.292 --> 00:28:21.458
- [narrator] Come to Philly.
- [bell dings]
611
00:28:21.917 --> 00:28:23.208
[narrator] We’re better than New York.
612
00:28:24.292 --> 00:28:26.458
I always forget
how beautiful this city is.
613
00:28:27.292 --> 00:28:29.375
- Can you check that?
- ["Eye Of The Tiger" concludes]
614
00:28:31.792 --> 00:28:33.708
- [cellphone dings]
- What? What is it?
615
00:28:38.125 --> 00:28:39.250
What the...
616
00:28:40.250 --> 00:28:42.250
[Jenny] What’s he gonna do to our dog?
617
00:28:42.625 --> 00:28:44.083
He isn’t gonna hurt him, right?
618
00:28:45.417 --> 00:28:46.417
No!
619
00:28:47.417 --> 00:28:50.625
No. It's okay.
Let's just get to the hotel.
620
00:28:52.958 --> 00:28:53.958
Yeah.
621
00:28:54.542 --> 00:28:56.958
- What's the address?
- I don't know, I’m still looking for one.
622
00:28:57.125 --> 00:28:58.833
You haven't booked one yet?
623
00:28:59.500 --> 00:29:02.833
Sorry. I was too busy making the trunk
comfortable for you.
624
00:29:03.042 --> 00:29:05.208
Besides, how hard is it
gonna be to find one?
625
00:29:05.333 --> 00:29:06.667
How was I supposed to know
626
00:29:06.667 --> 00:29:08.750
there was a pharmaceutical convention
this week?
627
00:29:11.125 --> 00:29:15.167
Good morrow, ladies.
Welcome to the Ben Franklin Inn & Spa.
628
00:29:15.167 --> 00:29:21.167
May I interest you in some johnnycakes
made fresh this morning by my lovely...
629
00:29:22.333 --> 00:29:23.333
self?
630
00:29:23.833 --> 00:29:25.000
Um, don’t touch that.
631
00:29:25.500 --> 00:29:27.417
- [groans]
- [Anne] We have a reservation.
632
00:29:27.542 --> 00:29:29.208
It’s under Anne Yum.
633
00:29:29.458 --> 00:29:33.542
Ah! Yes. I heard your voice
on that marvelous machine right there,
634
00:29:33.542 --> 00:29:37.833
that I have heard is called the telephone,
but I am unfamiliar with it.
635
00:29:38.542 --> 00:29:40.125
Identification and credit card, please.
636
00:29:40.458 --> 00:29:42.542
You don't know what a phone is,
but you know about credit cards?
637
00:29:43.125 --> 00:29:45.667
The concept of a credit card
is an easy one to grasp.
638
00:29:46.083 --> 00:29:51.542
I know what credit is, and I can assure
you I'm familiar with cards. [laughs]
639
00:29:52.250 --> 00:29:54.625
But that talking machine
was invented after my time.
640
00:29:54.625 --> 00:29:56.500
- [telephone ringing]
- Oh, what is that sound?
641
00:29:56.750 --> 00:29:58.292
’Tis a chirping bird?
642
00:29:59.833 --> 00:30:01.333
Ben Franklin Inn, please hold.
643
00:30:02.083 --> 00:30:04.417
Uh, so, are you supposed
to be Ben Franklin?
644
00:30:04.958 --> 00:30:08.000
Because if Ben Franklin
had just been alive this whole time,
645
00:30:08.125 --> 00:30:11.000
he would know what phones are.
I mean, he was really smart.
646
00:30:11.000 --> 00:30:15.000
Well, that is very kind of you to say
that I am smart.
647
00:30:15.000 --> 00:30:18.125
Yeah, but if you don't know
about phones, then what?
648
00:30:18.125 --> 00:30:22.625
You're just like a ghost of Ben Franklin,
who’s somehow stuck in the 1600s?
649
00:30:23.208 --> 00:30:26.167
- 1700s.
- And if you are stuck in the past,
650
00:30:26.167 --> 00:30:29.750
then your inn should not have
all this modern stuff. But it does.
651
00:30:29.750 --> 00:30:33.208
I mean, it makes no sense.
So, which is it? What are you?
652
00:30:34.333 --> 00:30:37.250
I... am Ben Franklin.
653
00:30:37.250 --> 00:30:39.042
Then why don't you have wooden teeth
like George Washington?
654
00:30:39.042 --> 00:30:43.083
- Jenny.
- And... lifting.
655
00:30:43.083 --> 00:30:47.458
- Can you just let him be Ben Franklin?
- In my family, we have wrinkly foreheads.
656
00:30:47.958 --> 00:30:50.167
I just want to let you know, sir,
that you're doing a great job.
657
00:30:51.167 --> 00:30:52.750
- Thank you.
- Good.
658
00:30:52.875 --> 00:30:56.500
Well, he's using a computer.
How very 17th century.
659
00:30:56.667 --> 00:30:58.375
- Eighteenth century.
- What?
660
00:30:58.583 --> 00:31:00.417
Even though your time is limited
661
00:31:00.417 --> 00:31:02.917
in our wonderful capital
of the United States of America,
662
00:31:03.083 --> 00:31:06.083
which is how I know it.
I, Ben Franklin, know it.
663
00:31:06.875 --> 00:31:09.792
If you need any help,
don't hesitate to call.
664
00:31:10.042 --> 00:31:12.750
- On the phone?
- Yes. On the phone.
665
00:31:13.208 --> 00:31:15.292
Future’s greatest gift.
666
00:31:16.125 --> 00:31:17.125
Tina!
667
00:31:18.958 --> 00:31:22.167
Would you please show our guests
to their chambers?
668
00:31:23.042 --> 00:31:25.125
Please take more time
putting your hat on.
669
00:31:25.625 --> 00:31:28.458
Just take your time.
Tina from the temp agency. [chuckles]
670
00:31:28.583 --> 00:31:29.833
Scooch, scooch.
671
00:31:33.458 --> 00:31:35.083
Welcome to the Betsy Ross suite.
672
00:31:36.583 --> 00:31:38.875
Oh, can you take this? Thank you.
673
00:31:40.792 --> 00:31:42.583
Right. Cute.
674
00:31:43.500 --> 00:31:45.458
Jenny, we’re too old to share a bed.
675
00:31:45.625 --> 00:31:51.250
Speak for yourself, Ben Franklin.
The thirties are the new twenties.
676
00:31:51.250 --> 00:31:53.000
Since when are you in your thirties?
677
00:31:53.125 --> 00:31:55.708
Oh, since I did a guess-my-age filter
and it said thirty...
678
00:31:57.167 --> 00:31:58.167
nine.
679
00:32:03.875 --> 00:32:07.208
You know, this place sucks.
Let's go to a real hotel.
680
00:32:07.333 --> 00:32:09.500
They have to have rooms
they keep open just in case.
681
00:32:09.500 --> 00:32:11.333
- I'll get them to give us one.
- How?
682
00:32:11.750 --> 00:32:14.458
Oh, I am amazing at getting stuff.
683
00:32:14.458 --> 00:32:18.417
I get really emotional and talk a lot,
so they get confused,
684
00:32:18.417 --> 00:32:21.917
and then they're willing to do
whatever they can to make it stop.
685
00:32:21.917 --> 00:32:23.667
See, just one second. Like this. [inhales]
686
00:32:25.958 --> 00:32:28.042
Please! Oh, my God!
687
00:32:28.333 --> 00:32:30.000
I know you’re only serving
the breakfast menu,
688
00:32:30.000 --> 00:32:31.583
but my husband needs fries!
689
00:32:31.583 --> 00:32:34.792
He has a rare kidney condition,
and if he doesn’t get salt, he’ll die!
690
00:32:35.167 --> 00:32:38.667
I’m too young to be a widow! I’m only 39.
691
00:32:39.875 --> 00:32:41.667
See? Works every time.
692
00:32:41.667 --> 00:32:44.583
You would publicly humiliate yourself
just to eat fries at breakfast?
693
00:32:45.333 --> 00:32:46.542
How is that humiliating?
694
00:32:49.375 --> 00:32:51.042
- [gasps]
- [tense music playing]
695
00:32:51.042 --> 00:32:52.458
- Oh!
- [Jenny] What?
696
00:32:52.458 --> 00:32:54.583
There's no TV. I can't watch the Quiz.
697
00:32:55.625 --> 00:32:57.792
Wait. Annie, where are you going? Annie!
698
00:32:58.208 --> 00:33:01.667
Yeah, but right now?
I mean, is it such an emergency?
699
00:33:01.667 --> 00:33:04.250
I can't miss it. I've watched it
every day since I was four.
700
00:33:04.250 --> 00:33:06.042
Wait. You’ve never skipped a night?
701
00:33:06.167 --> 00:33:08.250
Neither has Terry. Nothing stops him.
702
00:33:08.375 --> 00:33:09.583
- Not whiplash.
- [groans softly]
703
00:33:09.583 --> 00:33:11.292
Somewhere-- Get the first question.
704
00:33:11.417 --> 00:33:13.833
- ...country that...
- [Anne] An earthquake.
705
00:33:13.833 --> 00:33:15.208
...borders Switzerland.
706
00:33:15.500 --> 00:33:18.750
- [Anne] A swarm of bees.
- The answer is Mr. Potato Head.
707
00:33:18.917 --> 00:33:20.125
[Anne] Not even Frat Week!
708
00:33:20.125 --> 00:33:22.750
...which is, uh, one of the Twin Cities.
709
00:33:25.667 --> 00:33:26.792
Annie, what about, um...
710
00:33:27.208 --> 00:33:31.333
- [Anne] Hurry. It's probably starting!
- Jeez! Uh, are you...?
711
00:33:32.958 --> 00:33:35.458
- [indistinct chatter]
- [upbeat music playing]
712
00:33:45.792 --> 00:33:47.500
Excuse me? Sir...
713
00:33:48.250 --> 00:33:49.667
- Try again.
- Excuse me.
714
00:33:49.833 --> 00:33:53.500
Hey! Would you mind
changing the channel to the Quiz?
715
00:33:53.792 --> 00:33:56.208
Holy shit. It's the Quiz Lady.
716
00:33:57.125 --> 00:34:00.250
Oh, no. I think you have me confused
for another Asian lady.
717
00:34:00.750 --> 00:34:02.708
Then why'd she ask to change
the channel to the Quiz?
718
00:34:02.708 --> 00:34:05.167
Put it on. I wanna see
if she know all that stuff.
719
00:34:05.167 --> 00:34:07.000
- 'Cause that video could have been fake.
- Fake?
720
00:34:07.000 --> 00:34:09.708
Yeah, right. Like, 100 bucks
says she gets them all right.
721
00:34:09.833 --> 00:34:12.708
Ooh! All right. Not like I care
about this game.
722
00:34:12.708 --> 00:34:14.958
Darryl, shut your hole. Phils are at bat.
723
00:34:14.958 --> 00:34:16.417
- Whoa! Whoa!
- [Anne] What are you doing?
724
00:34:16.583 --> 00:34:17.792
Making some money.
725
00:34:17.792 --> 00:34:19.708
- Hey, everybody!
- [man 1] I'm trying to watch the game!
726
00:34:19.708 --> 00:34:23.042
The Quiz Lady's here.
And she wants to play some Quiz.
727
00:34:23.042 --> 00:34:24.792
Hundred bucks
says she gets them all right.
728
00:34:24.792 --> 00:34:27.583
- All we need is one TV. What do you say?
- [woman] Get down!
729
00:34:27.708 --> 00:34:29.125
[crowd booing]
730
00:34:29.792 --> 00:34:32.833
- Quiz! Quiz! Quiz! Quiz!
- Jenny! Stop chanting!
731
00:34:32.833 --> 00:34:35.083
Chanting always works. Quiz! Quiz!
732
00:34:35.083 --> 00:34:37.375
- Quiz! Quiz! Quiz!
- I see you.
733
00:34:37.375 --> 00:34:39.000
- Quiz! Quiz!
- Stop! These are people
734
00:34:39.000 --> 00:34:41.125
who punch police horses
when they’re happy!
735
00:34:41.125 --> 00:34:43.417
Hey, that’s a stereotype, okay?
That happened two separate occasions.
736
00:34:43.417 --> 00:34:44.708
- Okay! Okay.
- [Jenny] Come on!
737
00:34:44.708 --> 00:34:46.042
[indistinct clamor]
738
00:34:46.042 --> 00:34:50.625
I’m not sitting down until I see
Terry McTeer’s face on this TV.
739
00:34:50.833 --> 00:34:52.417
I don't care what you throw...
740
00:34:52.667 --> 00:34:55.292
- [grunts]
- [crowd gasps]
741
00:34:55.708 --> 00:34:57.333
- [man 2] Is the TV okay?
- [upbeat music fading]
742
00:34:59.958 --> 00:35:01.750
It was nice of that guy to drive us.
743
00:35:04.042 --> 00:35:07.125
You know, Phillies fans get a bad rap,
but deep down they’re nice.
744
00:35:07.958 --> 00:35:09.583
Sometimes stereotypes are wrong.
745
00:35:11.333 --> 00:35:12.417
They're always wrong.
746
00:35:13.042 --> 00:35:14.083
Hmm.
747
00:35:15.917 --> 00:35:18.500
It's funny, the word “stereotype”
has a fascinating etymology
748
00:35:18.500 --> 00:35:20.917
that I was reading about earlier--
Good Lord!
749
00:35:22.208 --> 00:35:26.625
How are you not in a massive amount
of pain right now?
750
00:35:26.750 --> 00:35:28.417
Oh, this happens all the time.
751
00:35:28.417 --> 00:35:31.875
Ever since I tried to catch a foul ball
at that World Series game.
752
00:35:33.083 --> 00:35:34.375
When I was dating Sammy.
753
00:35:35.250 --> 00:35:37.542
Anyway, it hurts when it pops out,
754
00:35:37.542 --> 00:35:39.833
and when it goes back in,
but in between, it’s not that bad.
755
00:35:40.000 --> 00:35:43.042
That is not just dislocated.
That is definitely broken.
756
00:35:43.042 --> 00:35:45.542
Oh, no, it's not.
I bet you, I could pop it back in myself.
757
00:35:45.542 --> 00:35:47.375
- No.
- Okay, but now, it’s gonna...
758
00:35:47.958 --> 00:35:49.417
- Okay. God!
- Jenny.
759
00:35:49.417 --> 00:35:51.167
God! Did you hear that? That was actually...
760
00:35:51.167 --> 00:35:52.375
- That was a crack!
- A little bit.
761
00:35:52.375 --> 00:35:53.833
- No, I can't.
- I’m gonna try it again. Wait.
762
00:35:53.833 --> 00:35:55.042
I can’t. It goes so far back!
763
00:35:55.042 --> 00:35:56.458
- Really? But it's...
- It goes so far back.
764
00:35:56.458 --> 00:35:58.292
- Does that gross you out?
- I’m gonna throw up!
765
00:35:58.458 --> 00:35:59.833
[laughs]
766
00:36:00.000 --> 00:36:01.833
- Jenny!
- Okay. Okay.
767
00:36:02.833 --> 00:36:04.375
- Can you put the ice pack on it...
- Okay. Okay.
768
00:36:04.375 --> 00:36:06.167
...to cover it,
so I don’t have to look at it?
769
00:36:06.292 --> 00:36:07.958
'Cause you’re scared of my wrist.
770
00:36:09.417 --> 00:36:10.708
Really, it doesn’t hurt that much.
771
00:36:13.875 --> 00:36:15.292
Too bad cousin Jin isn't here.
772
00:36:15.417 --> 00:36:17.375
- Fix that up for you.
- [chuckles]
773
00:36:17.958 --> 00:36:21.417
-"Jin is the best..." [laughs]
- [laughs]
774
00:36:22.750 --> 00:36:26.417
"He's the best surgeon in the world."
775
00:36:26.542 --> 00:36:29.083
[both laugh]
776
00:36:29.292 --> 00:36:34.458
Do you remember that summer in California?
He was so into skateboarding
777
00:36:34.458 --> 00:36:36.333
- but he was terrible at it.
- Oh, yeah.
778
00:36:36.458 --> 00:36:38.583
- Oh, that was the best summer.
- Right?
779
00:36:38.583 --> 00:36:40.750
Oh, my God, when we hit the freeway...
780
00:36:41.333 --> 00:36:43.125
Oh, I knew I found my destiny...
781
00:36:43.250 --> 00:36:44.500
["Walkin' on the Sun" playing]
782
00:36:44.500 --> 00:36:45.583
[Jenny] Burbank.
783
00:36:45.583 --> 00:36:49.333
♪ It ain't no joke
I'd like to buy the world a toke ♪
784
00:36:49.333 --> 00:36:50.750
♪ And teach the world... ♪
785
00:36:50.750 --> 00:36:53.667
[Jenny] Everything just felt so possible.
786
00:36:53.667 --> 00:36:57.458
The world was big and bright,
and everyone was getting along.
787
00:36:57.792 --> 00:37:01.250
No one was yelling at me to turn down
my music or get a job.
788
00:37:01.667 --> 00:37:04.375
For the first time,
I felt like I belonged.
789
00:37:04.792 --> 00:37:06.625
["Walkin' on the Sun" concluding]
790
00:37:06.750 --> 00:37:10.250
Too bad they hated us
and never invited us back.
791
00:37:14.375 --> 00:37:15.375
Yeah.
792
00:37:16.458 --> 00:37:19.125
I always hated being around them.
793
00:37:21.083 --> 00:37:22.667
They were so intimidating.
794
00:37:23.542 --> 00:37:27.042
When we went to go stay with them,
I was so nervous...
795
00:37:29.625 --> 00:37:33.125
that I didn't shit for, like,
the whole month we were there.
796
00:37:35.333 --> 00:37:39.458
So, one night, I woke up with just...
797
00:37:42.083 --> 00:37:45.333
the gurgles. You know what I mean? And...
798
00:37:47.708 --> 00:37:52.875
I was so scared that maybe they would,
like, hear it or that I’d clog the toilet
799
00:37:52.875 --> 00:37:54.958
or, like, something would happen.
800
00:37:57.458 --> 00:37:59.542
So, I went out in the backyard...
801
00:38:01.125 --> 00:38:02.583
and I dug a little hole...
802
00:38:04.208 --> 00:38:05.417
and I shit in there.
803
00:38:09.000 --> 00:38:11.958
That's how unwelcome I felt in that house.
804
00:38:16.375 --> 00:38:17.958
I never told anyone about that.
805
00:38:21.167 --> 00:38:22.375
It was all too much.
806
00:38:24.583 --> 00:38:28.125
The way that they would look at us
like we were... trash.
807
00:38:31.125 --> 00:38:35.875
No, they... They wanted to help,
that's why they let us stay there.
808
00:38:36.375 --> 00:38:38.250
They didn’t even talk about Dad.
809
00:38:39.125 --> 00:38:41.250
They were so embarrassed
about how he died.
810
00:38:42.292 --> 00:38:43.875
Divorced, broke...
811
00:38:44.917 --> 00:38:47.000
falling off a singles’ cruise
because he was trying to do
812
00:38:47.000 --> 00:38:48.875
the “king of the world” thing
from Titanic.
813
00:38:49.458 --> 00:38:54.208
Drowning in the Caribbean.
Like a... sad loser.
814
00:38:54.208 --> 00:38:58.083
Don’t say that.
He wasn't a loser. He was...
815
00:38:58.875 --> 00:39:00.792
- [PA ringing]
- [voice over PA] Jennifer Yum.
816
00:39:03.167 --> 00:39:05.167
[doctor] Well, good news.
817
00:39:06.250 --> 00:39:07.583
Doesn't seem to be broken.
818
00:39:08.667 --> 00:39:10.000
- Just dislocated.
- Mm.
819
00:39:10.292 --> 00:39:12.375
- I can just go ahead and...
- Oh!
820
00:39:12.667 --> 00:39:15.792
- [doctor] Hmm?
- Oh, wow! I told you.
821
00:39:16.958 --> 00:39:20.542
[exhales] How can I ever thank you
for saving my wrist?
822
00:39:20.542 --> 00:39:22.042
Oh, it's quite all right. [chuckles]
823
00:39:22.042 --> 00:39:25.500
- Maybe, like, a drink later?
- Well, I'm married. And gay.
824
00:39:26.750 --> 00:39:28.458
Why’d you have to say two reasons?
825
00:39:29.167 --> 00:39:31.167
- [Jenny humming]
- [cellphone dinging]
826
00:39:34.917 --> 00:39:37.542
- Oh, my God.
- What? What... What’s wrong?
827
00:39:37.542 --> 00:39:39.625
- [Anne] Ken. He sent me a video.
- [tense music playing]
828
00:39:39.792 --> 00:39:41.292
Give it to me. I’ll look at it.
829
00:39:44.000 --> 00:39:46.708
Mr. Linguini's getting
nice and comfortable over here.
830
00:39:47.292 --> 00:39:50.917
The longer you take to pay me back,
the happier he is with me.
831
00:39:51.500 --> 00:39:55.208
We’re calling him Porky now.
Isn’t that right, Mr. Porky?
832
00:39:55.208 --> 00:39:56.500
Want some wagyu?
833
00:39:57.542 --> 00:39:58.708
“Don’t mind if I do.”
834
00:39:59.708 --> 00:40:01.750
That’s how I picture him sounding
if he could talk.
835
00:40:02.667 --> 00:40:03.958
You’re running out of time.
836
00:40:04.083 --> 00:40:06.458
He’s gonna make it
so Linguini never wants to leave.
837
00:40:06.792 --> 00:40:10.708
Oh, that’s kinda brilliant.
Uh, in a bad way.
838
00:40:10.708 --> 00:40:12.375
In a bad-- Hey.
839
00:40:12.625 --> 00:40:14.958
Hey, hey, hey! It's gonna be okay.
840
00:40:14.958 --> 00:40:16.958
- [Anne] Linguini.
- We are gonna get him back, I promise.
841
00:40:17.208 --> 00:40:18.458
Don’t look at your phone.
842
00:40:19.667 --> 00:40:22.458
Do you have a laptop or something?
‘Cause I can't sleep without noise.
843
00:40:22.458 --> 00:40:23.750
Yeah, in that blue bag.
844
00:40:26.000 --> 00:40:28.375
Ah, whoo! Pop!
845
00:40:30.333 --> 00:40:34.792
- When did you get this? 1970?
- [Jenny] Chad gave it to me.
846
00:40:34.917 --> 00:40:37.333
He was with the CIA,
so you know it’s powerful.
847
00:40:40.083 --> 00:40:42.292
- Who is Chad?
- [Jenny] Oh, you remember Chad.
848
00:40:42.292 --> 00:40:44.167
I mean, aren’t you supposed
to have a great memory?
849
00:40:44.167 --> 00:40:45.792
Yeah, for things of note.
850
00:40:47.167 --> 00:40:50.875
Oh, well. I remember
everyone you've ever dated
851
00:40:50.875 --> 00:40:53.125
since it was just that one
weird kid who was so pale
852
00:40:53.125 --> 00:40:54.417
he was practically see-through.
853
00:40:54.958 --> 00:40:57.333
Francoise was not see-through.
854
00:40:57.333 --> 00:41:00.250
Yeah, well. It was like someone
Saran-wrapped a skeleton.
855
00:41:00.708 --> 00:41:03.542
- Ooh, Kahi Bounce Balm?
- No.
856
00:41:03.542 --> 00:41:05.333
Are you sure? It’s Korean.
857
00:41:05.333 --> 00:41:08.500
And also, Francoise and I weren’t dating,
we were just friends.
858
00:41:08.500 --> 00:41:10.667
It wasn’t his fault
that he was allergic to the sun.
859
00:41:10.667 --> 00:41:12.583
- What are you doing?
- I want space.
860
00:41:12.958 --> 00:41:15.917
Ah, okay. Well, I sleep with two pillows.
861
00:41:15.917 --> 00:41:18.083
- Thank you very much. Yes, I do.
- Do you sleep with two pillows?
862
00:41:18.208 --> 00:41:20.583
Because you can sleep
with two pillows on the floor.
863
00:41:20.583 --> 00:41:22.542
I’m sorry, I’m injured,
I'm not sleeping on the floor.
864
00:41:22.667 --> 00:41:25.250
- I'm not sleeping on the floor, either.
- Then sleep on the chair.
865
00:41:25.750 --> 00:41:27.542
I don't wanna sleep in a sitting position.
866
00:41:27.542 --> 00:41:29.375
Oh, my God. What is the big deal?
867
00:41:29.375 --> 00:41:32.875
- We used to sleep together all the time.
- Yeah, 20 years ago, before you left.
868
00:41:37.958 --> 00:41:39.458
Fine, pillow wall.
869
00:41:43.458 --> 00:41:44.500
[grunts]
870
00:41:47.375 --> 00:41:49.417
All right, you know what?
This is not half, by the way.
871
00:41:49.417 --> 00:41:50.500
[Anne] Yes, it is.
872
00:41:54.333 --> 00:41:56.500
I know you're really nervous
about tomorrow.
873
00:41:58.375 --> 00:42:01.042
But is there at least
a small part of you that's excited?
874
00:42:03.708 --> 00:42:04.708
Maybe.
875
00:42:05.542 --> 00:42:06.542
A little bit.
876
00:42:12.000 --> 00:42:13.958
You are gonna be great.
877
00:42:18.667 --> 00:42:22.958
[Terry] I can’t believe what I’m reading.
Are all three of you librarians?
878
00:42:23.083 --> 00:42:24.750
[audience laughing]
879
00:42:24.875 --> 00:42:25.917
Linguini?
880
00:42:27.125 --> 00:42:28.958
Linguini! Linguini, come here!
881
00:42:29.083 --> 00:42:30.375
- Linguini!
- Linguini! [gasps]
882
00:42:42.417 --> 00:42:43.417
Annie.
883
00:42:44.917 --> 00:42:45.917
Annie, wake up.
884
00:42:46.250 --> 00:42:47.542
It’s audition day.
885
00:42:49.333 --> 00:42:50.542
It’s so cold.
886
00:42:51.292 --> 00:42:52.292
[Jenny] It says,
887
00:42:52.458 --> 00:42:55.333
-"Report to the Liberty Conference Room."
- [patriotic music playing]
888
00:42:55.333 --> 00:42:58.000
Jesus, this city is,
like, obsessed with freedom.
889
00:43:03.125 --> 00:43:06.167
Annie. Annie. Annie. Annie. Okay.
890
00:43:06.375 --> 00:43:08.833
Okay. Look at me.
How are you feeling? How are you feeling?
891
00:43:08.958 --> 00:43:10.000
Bad.
892
00:43:10.000 --> 00:43:11.250
- [Jenny] Okay.
- I can't do this.
893
00:43:11.375 --> 00:43:12.958
- Yeah, yes, yes.
- Am I sweating?
894
00:43:13.708 --> 00:43:15.500
Um... yeah. You know what?
895
00:43:15.708 --> 00:43:18.667
Put your arms down.
Just put your arms down.
896
00:43:18.917 --> 00:43:23.667
Okay, good. Deep breath, deep breath.
One deep breath. Okay, you know what?
897
00:43:23.667 --> 00:43:25.417
- I can’t do this.
- Yes, you can!
898
00:43:25.417 --> 00:43:26.625
- [Anne] Mm-mm.
- No! Yes, you can.
899
00:43:26.625 --> 00:43:30.750
Annie. Yes, yes, yes. You know why?
900
00:43:31.833 --> 00:43:32.958
Because you're strong.
901
00:43:33.917 --> 00:43:38.750
Yeah? Okay. All right, let’s go.
Let’s go! Strong girl. Strong girl.
902
00:43:45.292 --> 00:43:48.208
- [Jenny] Hey!
- Hi! Oh, you must be here to audition.
903
00:43:48.208 --> 00:43:49.708
- Thank you.
- [Mercedes] Have a seat.
904
00:43:49.708 --> 00:43:50.917
Yep.
905
00:43:51.042 --> 00:43:54.042
[Jenny] Take it, take it. Sit down. Okay.
906
00:43:54.208 --> 00:43:57.292
All right. It’s all good. So exciting.
907
00:43:59.292 --> 00:44:00.833
There’s too many people here.
908
00:44:00.958 --> 00:44:02.083
Oh, don’t think about them.
909
00:44:02.208 --> 00:44:05.500
Just focus on the fact that you need
this money to save Mr. Linguini's life.
910
00:44:06.000 --> 00:44:07.333
That’s not helping.
911
00:44:08.167 --> 00:44:10.458
I can't do this. I can’t go on the show.
912
00:44:10.458 --> 00:44:13.042
I'm-- I'm-- I'm-- I'm--
I'm gonna end up like Marybeth Windlemore!
913
00:44:13.375 --> 00:44:14.750
Who’s Marybeth Windlemore?
914
00:44:15.375 --> 00:44:17.500
The lowest-scoring contestant of all time.
915
00:44:18.042 --> 00:44:21.833
She barely made it through
the Head to Head, and then she just froze.
916
00:44:22.250 --> 00:44:23.542
- Martha Stewart.
- [buzzer buzzing]
917
00:44:24.250 --> 00:44:27.542
- No... No. I mean... [stammers] Betty White.
- [buzzer buzzing]
918
00:44:27.750 --> 00:44:30.833
US First Ladies. Focus on the topic.
919
00:44:32.250 --> 00:44:34.708
- Nancy Sta... Stalin.
- [buzzer buzzing]
920
00:44:35.292 --> 00:44:36.375
Oh!
921
00:44:36.583 --> 00:44:39.625
- [audience laughing]
- And the internet was so mean to her.
922
00:44:40.125 --> 00:44:41.833
People hate it
when women are bad at things.
923
00:44:41.958 --> 00:44:43.375
You're not gonna be bad.
You're gonna be great.
924
00:44:43.583 --> 00:44:46.000
People don’t like it
when women are good at things, either!
925
00:44:46.458 --> 00:44:50.375
And the only reason
why I'm good is because I'm at home.
926
00:44:50.542 --> 00:44:51.875
It's just me and Linguini.
927
00:44:52.500 --> 00:44:55.042
I-- I-- I can’t play
in front of all these people.
928
00:44:55.042 --> 00:44:56.833
I-- I--
I think we should just sell my eggs.
929
00:44:56.833 --> 00:44:59.875
No, no, no, no. No.
Annie, look at me.
930
00:45:00.042 --> 00:45:01.208
Look at me. Annie, look at me.
931
00:45:01.208 --> 00:45:03.542
- Mm?
- It's gonna be okay.
932
00:45:03.708 --> 00:45:06.000
It’s just an audition. Come on.
We made it all this way.
933
00:45:06.375 --> 00:45:08.042
We gotta try, huh?
934
00:45:08.042 --> 00:45:09.583
- Just sit there. Breathe.
- [Anne] Please.
935
00:45:09.583 --> 00:45:12.208
Okay? I’ll fill this out!
All right? Just sit there.
936
00:45:12.792 --> 00:45:18.875
[exhales] Today’s date. I don’t know.
Tuesday? Tuesday.
937
00:45:19.083 --> 00:45:21.500
- ["Angry Girl (CHAI Version)" playing]
- Um, your name. Okay.
938
00:45:21.500 --> 00:45:25.667
Anne Yum.
Anne, do you wanna use Anne or Annie...
939
00:45:28.083 --> 00:45:29.333
♪ So mad, I'm an angry girl... ♪
940
00:45:29.500 --> 00:45:31.667
Hey! Hey!
941
00:45:32.125 --> 00:45:34.375
Get back here
you sneaky, little bitch! Annie!
942
00:45:35.125 --> 00:45:39.125
Don’t you... I told you I ran track!
943
00:45:39.500 --> 00:45:42.333
- [both grunt]
- Rugburn!
944
00:45:42.917 --> 00:45:45.333
- Why are you ruining this?
- Is everything okay?
945
00:45:45.542 --> 00:45:46.917
Oh, we're fine. Thank you.
946
00:45:48.208 --> 00:45:49.750
I am not fine.
947
00:45:49.750 --> 00:45:53.375
- My armpits are like Niagara Falls!
- Okay, just wait. Wait!
948
00:45:53.375 --> 00:45:57.625
Okay, get up. Get up!
Here. Here, here, here, here.
949
00:45:57.875 --> 00:45:59.542
Come on.
God, you are wet underneath there.
950
00:45:59.667 --> 00:46:04.083
Jesus. Okay, here. Just, you know,
put this on so no one can see.
951
00:46:04.875 --> 00:46:06.667
- What is it?
- It’s a hoodie.
952
00:46:07.417 --> 00:46:09.667
Okay. It's gonna be okay.
953
00:46:09.792 --> 00:46:12.750
You're having a panic attack.
We just need to get through it.
954
00:46:13.125 --> 00:46:14.292
How?
955
00:46:15.083 --> 00:46:17.667
Well, we're running short on time so, um...
956
00:46:19.417 --> 00:46:20.542
do you want drugs?
957
00:46:21.292 --> 00:46:22.792
- What?
- Do you want drugs?
958
00:46:23.500 --> 00:46:26.542
- I can’t...
- Drugs! For your anxiety!
959
00:46:27.000 --> 00:46:28.208
You have drugs?
960
00:46:29.375 --> 00:46:31.667
Oh, yeah. I got a ton of stuff.
961
00:46:33.125 --> 00:46:37.708
Um... I've got party pills,
Zen pills, fun stuff--
962
00:46:37.708 --> 00:46:39.292
Is that cocaine?
963
00:46:39.583 --> 00:46:43.458
[laughs awkwardly] It's stevia.
Do you ever use stevia?
964
00:46:43.458 --> 00:46:45.875
The sweetener?
Yeah. Yeah, I’ve got it in my pocket.
965
00:46:47.875 --> 00:46:51.375
God. You need this.
Doctors prescribe these.
966
00:46:52.167 --> 00:46:54.167
Okay, well, not these exactly.
These are from the street
967
00:46:54.167 --> 00:46:56.625
but they will help relax you a little.
968
00:46:57.667 --> 00:46:59.958
[voice over PA]
CSQ auditions begin in three minutes.
969
00:46:59.958 --> 00:47:02.500
All entrants report
to the Liberty Conference Room.
970
00:47:02.750 --> 00:47:05.125
Okay. For Linguini.
971
00:47:05.833 --> 00:47:09.625
Great. Hold this.
Got some water in here somewhere.
972
00:47:10.000 --> 00:47:13.208
I think... Okay.
And only take a quarter because...
973
00:47:14.708 --> 00:47:15.833
Because what?
974
00:47:18.667 --> 00:47:22.042
- Because what? Because what?
- Because. Because I want some.
975
00:47:22.875 --> 00:47:26.458
And now, you ate them all.
Okay, let’s go. Let’s go.
976
00:47:27.458 --> 00:47:29.542
- Thank you.
- [Mercedes] Thirty-one!
977
00:47:30.875 --> 00:47:33.042
- Now, you look like you have a bowl cut.
- No, I don't.
978
00:47:33.042 --> 00:47:35.875
Okay, pretty, pretty, right? Right?
979
00:47:35.875 --> 00:47:37.667
- How you feeling?
- [Mercedes] Anne Yum, are you here?
980
00:47:37.667 --> 00:47:39.500
- The same!
- Oh, yes, yes. We're here. We're here!
981
00:47:39.500 --> 00:47:41.583
She just had a little ladies' thing
982
00:47:41.583 --> 00:47:42.792
- in the ladies' room, so--
- Oh, okay.
983
00:47:42.792 --> 00:47:45.583
Oh, no, no. It's not for me.
It's for my sister, Anne. Anne Yum.
984
00:47:46.000 --> 00:47:47.375
- You want her here now?
- [Mercedes] Yeah.
985
00:47:47.500 --> 00:47:50.875
When are these drugs gonna kick in?
986
00:47:51.250 --> 00:47:52.500
♪ Watermelon sugar ♪
987
00:47:52.500 --> 00:47:53.875
♪ Strawberries ♪
988
00:47:54.750 --> 00:47:56.667
♪ On a summer evenin' ♪
989
00:47:58.250 --> 00:48:00.917
♪ Baby, you're the end of June... ♪
990
00:48:01.375 --> 00:48:02.417
[Terry] Hi, Anne!
991
00:48:02.417 --> 00:48:03.917
♪... I want your belly ♪
992
00:48:04.708 --> 00:48:06.500
♪ And that summer feelin' ♪
993
00:48:08.292 --> 00:48:11.083
♪ Getting washed away in you ♪
994
00:48:11.458 --> 00:48:16.042
♪ Breathe me in, breathe me out ♪
995
00:48:16.375 --> 00:48:21.375
♪ I don't know
if I could ever go without ♪
996
00:48:21.375 --> 00:48:23.542
♪ Watermelon sugar high ♪
997
00:48:23.875 --> 00:48:26.125
♪ Watermelon sugar high ♪
998
00:48:26.458 --> 00:48:27.625
♪ Watermelon sugar high... ♪
999
00:48:27.792 --> 00:48:28.792
Annie.
1000
00:48:29.042 --> 00:48:31.083
♪ ...Watermelon sugar high ♪
1001
00:48:31.375 --> 00:48:32.750
♪ Watermelon sugar... ♪
1002
00:48:32.958 --> 00:48:34.792
- Hi, Annie!
- Hi, Annie!
1003
00:48:34.917 --> 00:48:36.292
♪ Watermelon sugar high... ♪
1004
00:48:36.875 --> 00:48:37.875
[clouds] Annie!
1005
00:48:38.792 --> 00:48:39.833
[clouds] Hi!
1006
00:48:40.000 --> 00:48:41.792
- ["Watermelon Sugar" stops]
- [indistinct chatter]
1007
00:48:41.917 --> 00:48:43.417
Close your mouth, you look insane.
1008
00:48:44.042 --> 00:48:45.625
[Mercedes] All right,
for today's audition,
1009
00:48:45.625 --> 00:48:48.583
everyone is going to get a chance to play
all three rounds.
1010
00:48:48.750 --> 00:48:50.292
We will start with the Blitz.
1011
00:48:50.500 --> 00:48:53.167
- Hi! I love your bangs.
- Please don't make her go first.
1012
00:48:53.167 --> 00:48:54.583
Please don't make her go first.
1013
00:48:54.708 --> 00:48:57.542
- [Mercedes] Angela Jackson. Come on up.
- Close your mouth. Close your mouth.
1014
00:48:57.667 --> 00:49:00.292
- Charles Von Kampf and...
- Annie.
1015
00:49:02.125 --> 00:49:04.875
- ...Anne Yum.
- Oh, shit! Anne.
1016
00:49:05.625 --> 00:49:09.208
- ["Watermelon Sugar" playing]
- Anne, it's your turn to play.
1017
00:49:09.375 --> 00:49:11.958
♪ ...High, watermelon sugar... ♪
1018
00:49:12.167 --> 00:49:15.250
- Bye. Good. Bye. Bye.
- ["Watermelon Sugar" concluding]
1019
00:49:15.417 --> 00:49:17.542
[Mercedes] Okay, so you're gonna take
a seat and then we're gonna look
1020
00:49:17.542 --> 00:49:18.833
at our categories.
1021
00:49:18.833 --> 00:49:21.875
Film, Italian literature, language,
1022
00:49:21.875 --> 00:49:25.042
- museums, physics, world history...
- Don't wanna sit on it wrong.
1023
00:49:25.042 --> 00:49:26.208
- ...home gardening.
- Jeez.
1024
00:49:26.208 --> 00:49:27.667
Entomology and weather.
1025
00:49:28.125 --> 00:49:30.583
So soft. Do you realize--
You feel how soft it is?
1026
00:49:31.333 --> 00:49:33.583
Okay, so we have five minutes
on the clock.
1027
00:49:34.000 --> 00:49:36.250
And your time starts now.
1028
00:49:36.458 --> 00:49:39.958
What was the first film
to gross over a billion dollars worldwide?
1029
00:49:39.958 --> 00:49:41.292
- Angela.
- Titanic.
1030
00:49:41.292 --> 00:49:43.167
- [Mercedes] Yes. The majority of weather...
- Wake up!
1031
00:49:43.292 --> 00:49:45.208
- ...occurs in which atmospheric layer?
- [bell dinging]
1032
00:49:45.333 --> 00:49:46.333
- [Mercedes] Angela.
- [snores]
1033
00:49:46.333 --> 00:49:48.000
- [Angela] Troposphere.
- [Mercedes] Correct.
1034
00:49:48.000 --> 00:49:49.833
- What is the deadliest insect?
- Annie!
1035
00:49:49.833 --> 00:49:51.500
- Mosquito.
- [Mercedes] You nailed it.
1036
00:49:51.500 --> 00:49:53.708
[Mercedes]
What is the oldest written language?
1037
00:49:53.708 --> 00:49:55.000
- [bell dinging]
- [Mercedes] Charles.
1038
00:49:55.000 --> 00:49:56.125
- Sumerian.
- [Mercedes] Yes.
1039
00:49:56.333 --> 00:49:57.917
Look at you, Father Time.
1040
00:49:58.125 --> 00:50:00.500
- [audience laughing]
- [Mercedes] What's that, Miss Yum?
1041
00:50:00.667 --> 00:50:02.542
[Anne] Mm. What are you doing?
1042
00:50:02.875 --> 00:50:03.958
- [Mercedes] Miss Yum?
- Hmm.
1043
00:50:04.583 --> 00:50:06.417
Is everything all right, Miss Yum?
1044
00:50:06.417 --> 00:50:07.500
[chuckles]
1045
00:50:07.500 --> 00:50:09.375
[Mercedes] Who was the first president
to be photographed
1046
00:50:09.375 --> 00:50:11.083
- at their inauguration?
- [bell dinging]
1047
00:50:11.083 --> 00:50:12.667
- Abraham Lincoln.
- Yes. Correct.
1048
00:50:12.958 --> 00:50:15.458
Oh! Do you know that
because you were there?
1049
00:50:15.625 --> 00:50:19.500
- [audience laughing]
- Miss Yum, you... you doing okay?
1050
00:50:19.667 --> 00:50:21.750
- Shit! Shit!
- [Anne] Oh. I'm just kinda hot.
1051
00:50:21.750 --> 00:50:23.000
- I think I might just...
- [Mercedes] Okay.
1052
00:50:23.000 --> 00:50:24.750
- ...take this off because I don't...
- Bingo.
1053
00:50:24.750 --> 00:50:26.708
- [Anne] The sleeves. It’s hot in here.
- Up, up!
1054
00:50:26.708 --> 00:50:28.958
- Whoa, that's tight.
- Sorry. Sorry. My bad, my bad, my bad.
1055
00:50:28.958 --> 00:50:31.083
I forgot to give her
her diabetes medication.
1056
00:50:31.208 --> 00:50:33.042
- You got popcorn?
- No, no, I don't have popcorn.
1057
00:50:33.042 --> 00:50:34.667
- Put this down. Hey, hey.
- [Anne] Hi, Jenny.
1058
00:50:34.667 --> 00:50:36.417
When she doesn't take it,
she gets drowsy, so...
1059
00:50:36.417 --> 00:50:39.000
Drowsiness can't be solved
by diabetes medication.
1060
00:50:39.833 --> 00:50:41.250
- Are you a doctor?
- Yes.
1061
00:50:41.417 --> 00:50:42.875
- A diabetes doctor?
- Yes.
1062
00:50:44.292 --> 00:50:47.000
Well, this is Eastern medicine,
so get with the times, Big Pharma.
1063
00:50:47.167 --> 00:50:48.208
Annie, take your medicine.
1064
00:50:48.208 --> 00:50:49.292
- That... that... that's good.
- [inhales]
1065
00:50:49.292 --> 00:50:50.375
Okay, now, swallow.
1066
00:50:50.500 --> 00:50:52.333
- [whimsical music playing]
- [clouds] Swallow.
1067
00:50:52.458 --> 00:50:57.875
Now, swallow, swallow. Great.
[echoes] Annie, now you can play.
1068
00:50:57.875 --> 00:51:00.458
Our next question is in the sciences.
1069
00:51:00.792 --> 00:51:02.667
- What is the only element...
- [thunder rumbling]
1070
00:51:02.667 --> 00:51:04.542
...that can exist without...
1071
00:51:04.542 --> 00:51:06.125
- [echoes] ...neutrons?
- [rock music playing]
1072
00:51:06.250 --> 00:51:07.250
[clouds whimper]
1073
00:51:07.250 --> 00:51:08.667
- H... hydrogen.
- [in deep voice] Correct.
1074
00:51:08.917 --> 00:51:11.875
What is the smallest bone
in the human body?
1075
00:51:11.875 --> 00:51:14.625
[clouds] You have to get them all, Anne.
Or else we'll die!
1076
00:51:14.625 --> 00:51:15.875
- It's the stapes!
- [clouds whimper]
1077
00:51:15.875 --> 00:51:17.792
- The stapes! The stapes!
- [music cuts off]
1078
00:51:17.792 --> 00:51:19.667
- [bell dinging]
- Yes. C... correct.
1079
00:51:19.833 --> 00:51:22.083
Yes! Just gotta keep this up
for a couple more hours.
1080
00:51:22.208 --> 00:51:23.708
- Oh, God!
- [Mercedes] Anne?
1081
00:51:23.708 --> 00:51:25.000
- [bell dinging]
- Correct!
1082
00:51:25.000 --> 00:51:26.083
- Oh, no!
- [Mercedes] You got it.
1083
00:51:26.083 --> 00:51:27.667
- Anne. Anne. Anne. Anne. Yes!
- [bell dinging]
1084
00:51:27.792 --> 00:51:30.417
No, no! Are you seeing this?
1085
00:51:31.208 --> 00:51:33.042
[Mercedes] Okay, and one for Anne.
1086
00:51:33.208 --> 00:51:35.167
- Best Picture Oscar winners.
- [Anne whimpers]
1087
00:51:36.167 --> 00:51:38.292
- I'mma do it in order if that's okay.
- Oh, you don't have to...
1088
00:51:38.292 --> 00:51:40.458
Wings, Broadway Melody,
All Quiet on the Western Front,
1089
00:51:40.458 --> 00:51:41.833
- Cimarron, Grand Hotel...
- [audience murmuring]
1090
00:51:41.833 --> 00:51:44.667
...Cavalcade, It Happened One Night,
Mutiny on the Bounty, The Great Ziegfeld,
1091
00:51:44.667 --> 00:51:46.083
- Time!
- All About Eve.
1092
00:51:46.083 --> 00:51:47.917
- An American in Paris.
- Okay, your time is up.
1093
00:51:47.917 --> 00:51:50.375
The Greatest Show on Earth, Birdman,
Spotlight, Moonlight, Shape of Water,
1094
00:51:50.375 --> 00:51:53.000
- Green Book, Parasite, Nomadland, CODA!
- [cheers]
1095
00:51:53.000 --> 00:51:55.458
- [bell dinging]
- [laughs] Oh, hello!
1096
00:51:55.458 --> 00:51:57.375
- [Mercedes] Okay!
- I'm sorry.
1097
00:51:57.833 --> 00:52:00.708
[sighs] Okay. That was amazing.
1098
00:52:00.708 --> 00:52:02.333
I had no idea
you've seen all those movies!
1099
00:52:02.333 --> 00:52:04.625
I haven't.
I feel like my heart's gonna explode.
1100
00:52:04.625 --> 00:52:08.792
Okay? Um. You know what?
Here's something. Eat something. Eat this.
1101
00:52:08.792 --> 00:52:10.333
Uh. It might take the edge off.
1102
00:52:11.125 --> 00:52:14.292
You know what? I have some...
I have some water in here too.
1103
00:52:14.292 --> 00:52:16.875
- So, maybe-- Okay, okay. You know what?
- [grunts]
1104
00:52:17.458 --> 00:52:18.917
- [groans]
- That's good. Take a moment.
1105
00:52:18.917 --> 00:52:20.833
- Take a moment. Breathe.
- [groans]
1106
00:52:20.833 --> 00:52:23.375
God, it's like you're a boxer
or something! This is so exciting!
1107
00:52:23.375 --> 00:52:25.417
- [groans]
- Okay. Okay. There's just, like, what?
1108
00:52:25.417 --> 00:52:26.500
The Coin?
1109
00:52:26.708 --> 00:52:28.833
- Oh, God. The Coin!
- [rock music playing]
1110
00:52:28.833 --> 00:52:31.083
[Mercedes] I know,
it looks a lot bigger on TV.
1111
00:52:31.250 --> 00:52:35.292
- Heads is "Say It" and tails is "Show It!
- [whimpers]
1112
00:52:35.792 --> 00:52:38.000
- [groans]
- And it's heads!
1113
00:52:38.458 --> 00:52:40.000
Yes! Victory is mine!
1114
00:52:40.000 --> 00:52:41.875
And I feel so relieved
because I can win now,
1115
00:52:42.000 --> 00:52:43.583
and the clouds above won't die.
1116
00:52:45.167 --> 00:52:49.917
Yes, yes. The clouds won't die.
They're gonna live.
1117
00:52:50.042 --> 00:52:52.208
It's an old Chinese saying, you know?
1118
00:52:52.333 --> 00:52:54.458
- Yeah. Blessings.
- [audience] Ah!
1119
00:52:54.458 --> 00:52:55.625
[gentle music playing]
1120
00:52:55.750 --> 00:52:57.958
Okay. Here we are, here we are.
1121
00:52:57.958 --> 00:53:01.125
- Step down, step down, and down.
- The metal chariot.
1122
00:53:01.125 --> 00:53:03.625
- No, no, no, no, no, no. Not... Not that.
- I don't go in the trunk?
1123
00:53:03.625 --> 00:53:05.292
- Shotgun.
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
1124
00:53:05.292 --> 00:53:08.000
- Okay, okay. All right.
- Well, at least I did it.
1125
00:53:08.000 --> 00:53:12.167
Uh. You didn't just do it, Annie.
You crushed that audition.
1126
00:53:12.958 --> 00:53:15.542
Okay? Yeah, yeah.
Okay. Just get in, get in.
1127
00:53:15.875 --> 00:53:19.167
Wanna get your leg in?
Okay, there we go. She's in, she's in.
1128
00:53:19.167 --> 00:53:22.083
- Not kidnapping her, are you?
- [chuckles] Not anymore.
1129
00:53:27.667 --> 00:53:29.667
[indistinct chatter]
1130
00:53:30.250 --> 00:53:31.375
Ah!
1131
00:53:32.458 --> 00:53:34.708
Surprising that you have
Eggs Benedict here.
1132
00:53:34.708 --> 00:53:39.000
Yeah! Oh, yes! Pains me to serve
a dish named after a traitor.
1133
00:53:39.417 --> 00:53:43.792
Alas, it's a popular item
which the ignorant expect on every buffet.
1134
00:53:44.125 --> 00:53:46.167
And herein lies my conundrum. [chuckles]
1135
00:53:46.458 --> 00:53:48.667
Sounds like you might need
to make a pro-con list.
1136
00:53:48.667 --> 00:53:51.333
Oh! [chuckles] Look at you, Miss Yum.
1137
00:53:51.458 --> 00:53:55.083
You have read my 1772 letter
to Joseph Priestly, have you not?
1138
00:53:55.208 --> 00:53:56.375
- Well...
- That's wonderful. [chuckles]
1139
00:53:56.375 --> 00:53:57.667
- [Jenny] Annie!
- Uh-oh, the enemy.
1140
00:53:57.667 --> 00:54:00.375
[chuckles] Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
The Quiz just emailed.
1141
00:54:00.667 --> 00:54:02.333
They said to expect a call soon.
1142
00:54:03.083 --> 00:54:05.167
- Oh, my God, I can't believe it.
- [Jenny chuckles, shrieks]
1143
00:54:05.167 --> 00:54:09.250
- I'm... I'm... I'm gonna be on the show.
- And you thought I could not be Oprah.
1144
00:54:09.250 --> 00:54:10.333
- [chuckles]
- Well, too bad
1145
00:54:10.333 --> 00:54:11.417
the Choochie's money isn't real.
1146
00:54:11.417 --> 00:54:13.167
You'd be flying
around the world like Mary Poppins
1147
00:54:13.167 --> 00:54:16.542
- with that gigantic unnecessary bag.
- Mm-hmm.
1148
00:54:17.250 --> 00:54:18.625
- Well...
- [Anne] What?
1149
00:54:20.042 --> 00:54:22.792
Um. I lied about the Choochie's money.
1150
00:54:22.958 --> 00:54:24.583
- Yeah, I know.
- No, no, no, no.
1151
00:54:24.708 --> 00:54:27.625
I lied about lying
about the Choochie's money.
1152
00:54:27.625 --> 00:54:29.083
It's totally real!
1153
00:54:29.333 --> 00:54:31.292
I'm getting a giant check,
just like on TV.
1154
00:54:31.292 --> 00:54:33.167
- I made them put that in the contract.
- But...
1155
00:54:33.542 --> 00:54:35.833
I'm sorry. [chuckles]
Uh. Wh... what are you saying?
1156
00:54:35.833 --> 00:54:40.542
Oh, I knew that the only way
that you would do this is if you thought
1157
00:54:40.542 --> 00:54:42.292
it was the only way.
1158
00:54:43.958 --> 00:54:45.042
Life coaching.
1159
00:54:45.042 --> 00:54:50.208
Yeah, but we could've paid off the debt
and I could have Linguini back.
1160
00:54:50.625 --> 00:54:52.708
Yeah, but I told you
that the money hasn't come in yet.
1161
00:54:53.000 --> 00:54:54.000
Oh, my God!
1162
00:54:54.625 --> 00:54:57.000
- Even your lies are lies.
- I'm not lying.
1163
00:54:57.583 --> 00:54:58.792
You always do this.
1164
00:54:58.958 --> 00:55:01.542
You don't think
about the consequences of your actions.
1165
00:55:01.542 --> 00:55:05.167
Mr. Linguini is everything to me,
and to you, he's just a pawn.
1166
00:55:05.875 --> 00:55:08.042
- I thought you were trying to help me.
- I am.
1167
00:55:08.042 --> 00:55:11.875
I'm helping you get him back
while also seizing your destiny!
1168
00:55:11.875 --> 00:55:16.250
- Oh, my God, destiny isn't real!
- Yes, it is. We all have a purpose.
1169
00:55:16.250 --> 00:55:17.375
We just need to find it.
1170
00:55:17.375 --> 00:55:19.625
No. See, that's just a lie
that you tell yourself
1171
00:55:19.625 --> 00:55:21.875
because you're just chasing
these stupid dreams,
1172
00:55:21.875 --> 00:55:23.917
then blaming whatever you can
when they don't work out.
1173
00:55:23.917 --> 00:55:28.208
But the truth is, it's you.
You're selfish. You're reckless.
1174
00:55:28.708 --> 00:55:31.083
- You are just like Mom!
- Don't say that!
1175
00:55:32.500 --> 00:55:34.875
Just take some responsibility
for your life.
1176
00:55:34.875 --> 00:55:36.750
Stop being such a goddamn loser.
1177
00:55:40.917 --> 00:55:42.333
- [Anne groans]
- [crowd gasps]
1178
00:55:42.458 --> 00:55:43.875
You're the loser!
1179
00:55:44.375 --> 00:55:46.333
- Yes, I am lonely and currently unhoused...
- [speaks indistinctly]
1180
00:55:46.458 --> 00:55:49.042
...and my life hasn't turned out
exactly the way I wanted.
1181
00:55:49.458 --> 00:55:52.875
Do you have any idea how hard it is
to be an Asian woman in this country?
1182
00:55:53.000 --> 00:55:54.250
[crowd murmuring]
1183
00:55:54.250 --> 00:55:56.417
- Oh, my God!
- [Jenny] But at least I've lived!
1184
00:55:56.417 --> 00:55:57.625
What have you done with your life?
1185
00:55:57.750 --> 00:55:59.500
I mean, you just, like,
hide out in your robot house
1186
00:55:59.500 --> 00:56:01.625
just while watching the Quiz,
watching the Quiz.
1187
00:56:01.750 --> 00:56:04.458
Yeah, and take care of Mom
and lend you money, and support myself.
1188
00:56:04.458 --> 00:56:06.583
I am responsible for everything!
1189
00:56:06.583 --> 00:56:09.542
- Excuse me, ladies, if you don't mind--
- Fuck off, Ben Franklin!
1190
00:56:09.708 --> 00:56:11.750
- [crowd gasps]
- I absolutely will.
1191
00:56:11.958 --> 00:56:14.042
You're the older sister,
you're supposed to help me.
1192
00:56:14.250 --> 00:56:17.500
But you never have, you were never there.
All you care about is yourself!
1193
00:56:17.667 --> 00:56:20.083
That is not true.
I was always looking out for you.
1194
00:56:20.792 --> 00:56:21.792
Yeah? When?
1195
00:56:21.792 --> 00:56:25.000
In Burbank!
When you shit in the goddamn hole!
1196
00:56:27.167 --> 00:56:29.167
You didn't bury it deep enough.
1197
00:56:30.125 --> 00:56:31.208
So, the next day,
1198
00:56:31.333 --> 00:56:33.208
when So-Yung and Na-Yung
and I got back from Starbucks...
1199
00:56:33.208 --> 00:56:35.292
Appa said you can live with us
and you can come with me
1200
00:56:35.292 --> 00:56:36.708
to UCLA next year!
1201
00:56:36.708 --> 00:56:38.875
- And we can start our fashion line!
- Yeah!
1202
00:56:38.875 --> 00:56:39.958
- Oh, my God!
- Oh, Jenny!
1203
00:56:39.958 --> 00:56:41.167
[Jin] Uh. Guys.
1204
00:56:41.458 --> 00:56:45.333
- Come here. You gotta see this.
- [Jenny] Cousin Jin found it.
1205
00:56:45.958 --> 00:56:48.708
- [Na-Yung] Ew!
- [So-Yung] Tiger, did you do this?
1206
00:56:49.000 --> 00:56:52.875
- How could that come out of Tiger?
- [So-Yung] Well, then who did it?
1207
00:56:54.417 --> 00:56:55.750
[Jenny] I knew right away it was you.
1208
00:56:58.500 --> 00:57:01.042
And it was just a matter of time
before they figured it out.
1209
00:57:04.750 --> 00:57:07.833
So, I told them I did it.
1210
00:57:10.292 --> 00:57:13.083
[all, in slow motion] Ew!
1211
00:57:15.125 --> 00:57:17.667
Uncle Joon was gonna let us live
with them in Burbank
1212
00:57:17.667 --> 00:57:21.792
'cause Mom was, like, on a bender.
But everything changed after that.
1213
00:57:22.875 --> 00:57:25.708
I mean, do... do you know how insane
an 18-year-old would have to be
1214
00:57:25.708 --> 00:57:27.208
to shit in a hole?
1215
00:57:27.417 --> 00:57:29.375
[crowd murmuring]
1216
00:57:29.542 --> 00:57:30.792
Why didn't you tell me?
1217
00:57:32.500 --> 00:57:33.667
Because you were eight.
1218
00:57:33.917 --> 00:57:36.667
[somber music playing]
1219
00:57:39.625 --> 00:57:42.000
- Asshole!
- [crowd murmuring]
1220
00:57:42.125 --> 00:57:44.958
[footsteps receding]
1221
00:57:54.958 --> 00:57:58.417
Anne, where is my 100 bucks?
1222
00:58:00.208 --> 00:58:03.917
- [sobs, sniffles]
- [Francine] Anne...
1223
00:58:05.375 --> 00:58:07.792
You... you... you... you wanna come in?
1224
00:58:08.292 --> 00:58:10.042
- [sobs, sniffles]
- [Francine] Come on.
1225
00:58:10.250 --> 00:58:12.750
- [kettle whistling]
- [cutlery clattering]
1226
00:58:18.875 --> 00:58:20.583
- [Francine] Here.
- [cutlery clattering]
1227
00:58:23.125 --> 00:58:24.333
[grunts]
1228
00:58:25.375 --> 00:58:28.000
I didn't know
you were a Pee-wee Herman fan.
1229
00:58:28.917 --> 00:58:30.500
Who the hell is Pee-wee Herman?
1230
00:58:31.375 --> 00:58:32.417
P-- Uh.
1231
00:58:33.875 --> 00:58:38.667
That's Alan Cumming from The Good Wife.
Such a wonderful actor.
1232
00:58:38.667 --> 00:58:42.333
And that Scottish accent of his.
[chuckles]
1233
00:58:43.042 --> 00:58:45.708
That's not Alan Cumming,
that's P-- That's Paul Reubens.
1234
00:58:45.708 --> 00:58:48.792
He plays Pee-wee... Herman.
1235
00:58:48.792 --> 00:58:53.125
I think I would know
who my favorite actor is,
1236
00:58:53.125 --> 00:58:56.792
thank you very much. That is Alan Cumming.
1237
00:58:58.125 --> 00:58:59.208
Mm-hmm.
1238
00:59:01.625 --> 00:59:03.833
So, what's wrong with you?
1239
00:59:05.333 --> 00:59:06.375
I just...
1240
00:59:08.208 --> 00:59:09.417
I thought I was happy.
1241
00:59:10.500 --> 00:59:11.542
And maybe I wasn't.
1242
00:59:12.667 --> 00:59:15.583
I've just been so scared.
1243
00:59:16.333 --> 00:59:21.167
You know, scared of... of being judged,
being laughed at.
1244
00:59:22.167 --> 00:59:25.458
When I was younger,
I wasted so much energy
1245
00:59:25.583 --> 00:59:27.542
trying to get people to like me.
1246
00:59:28.667 --> 00:59:30.917
And for what? Hmm?
1247
00:59:31.625 --> 00:59:35.708
So, I could get invited
to some potluck dinner party?
1248
00:59:35.708 --> 00:59:39.958
- And terrible games of charades?
- Ugh. I hate charades.
1249
00:59:39.958 --> 00:59:44.750
Oh, I love charades.
I am an excellent guesser.
1250
00:59:45.083 --> 00:59:48.750
So long as the person who's acting out
the clues is not a total imbecile,
1251
00:59:48.750 --> 00:59:50.792
- which they usually are.
- [scoffs]
1252
00:59:50.917 --> 00:59:52.625
I've been alive a long time.
1253
00:59:53.667 --> 00:59:55.083
I've met a lot of people.
1254
00:59:56.500 --> 00:59:57.750
I only liked one.
1255
00:59:59.958 --> 01:00:00.958
Was it me?
1256
01:00:02.208 --> 01:00:04.667
No. You get too much mail.
1257
01:00:05.750 --> 01:00:11.250
The point is... [sighs]
...you don't want to waste time
1258
01:00:11.375 --> 01:00:14.333
looking for happiness in other people...
1259
01:00:15.500 --> 01:00:17.250
because happiness...
1260
01:00:18.792 --> 01:00:22.500
happiness... does not exist.
1261
01:00:24.333 --> 01:00:25.792
- Mm-hmm.
- [cellphone ringing]
1262
01:00:25.792 --> 01:00:28.875
Oh! Judge Judy.
1263
01:00:29.042 --> 01:00:31.500
[announcer over TV] Next up,
she's the voice you trust.
1264
01:00:31.792 --> 01:00:33.000
[chuckles]
1265
01:00:33.542 --> 01:00:36.875
- [indistinct chatter]
- [cellphone ringing]
1266
01:00:41.208 --> 01:00:42.500
- Hello?
- [Mercedes] Hi!
1267
01:00:42.500 --> 01:00:46.625
We wanna put Anne on Can't Stop the Quiz.
Can she fly out ASAP?
1268
01:00:47.000 --> 01:00:49.917
Um. I'm sorry.
I'm no longer part of her journey.
1269
01:00:49.917 --> 01:00:53.042
So, you'll have to call her directly.
1270
01:00:53.333 --> 01:00:55.667
[Mercedes] Um. I'm sorry, journey?
Where is she go...
1271
01:00:56.625 --> 01:00:58.208
- [indistinct chatter]
- [keyboards clicking]
1272
01:01:04.083 --> 01:01:06.917
- [telephone ringing]
- Internal auditing.
1273
01:01:07.125 --> 01:01:08.667
[Mercedes] Hi! Is this Anne Yum?
1274
01:01:10.792 --> 01:01:11.792
Yes.
1275
01:01:11.792 --> 01:01:13.750
This is Mercedes from the Quiz.
1276
01:01:13.750 --> 01:01:15.917
Great news!
We'd love to have you on the show!
1277
01:01:15.917 --> 01:01:18.708
- Any chance you could fly out tonight?
- Tonight?
1278
01:01:18.708 --> 01:01:20.917
- Okay. You’re gonna regret...
- [Mercedes] Yeah, I know it's last minute...
1279
01:01:20.917 --> 01:01:22.208
I'm telling you...
1280
01:01:22.208 --> 01:01:24.208
[Mercedes] ...but we'd love to capitalize
on the buzz from your video.
1281
01:01:24.208 --> 01:01:25.875
[Anne] I can't really hear you.
Hold on one sec.
1282
01:01:25.875 --> 01:01:29.042
- Oh, my God. Obsessed with the neti pot.
- I got you one for Christmas for a reason.
1283
01:01:29.042 --> 01:01:30.125
- [shushes]
- God!
1284
01:01:30.750 --> 01:01:33.833
Uh. Do you guys, like, have to eat here?
Or, like, is there another...
1285
01:01:34.500 --> 01:01:36.917
- This is our spot, Fran.
- Yeah, it's kinda great.
1286
01:01:36.917 --> 01:01:38.542
‘Cause then the food smell
stays over here,
1287
01:01:38.542 --> 01:01:40.250
- not at our desks.
- Yeah. I know, I know.
1288
01:01:40.375 --> 01:01:41.875
- No one's here, like... [laughs]
- [Marge] Yeah.
1289
01:01:41.875 --> 01:01:43.458
- [Trav] You're sweating.
- [Marge] It's really spicy.
1290
01:01:43.458 --> 01:01:44.542
[Mercedes] Hello?
1291
01:01:44.542 --> 01:01:46.500
- Sorry about that, I just...
- [Mercedes] And we need the information
1292
01:01:46.500 --> 01:01:47.625
for whoever you wanna bring
1293
01:01:47.625 --> 01:01:48.875
- ...as your partner.
- [Marge laughing]
1294
01:01:49.000 --> 01:01:52.083
[Anne] I'm so sorry about that.
I just had-- Sorry, one second. I just...
1295
01:01:52.083 --> 01:01:54.375
[Marge] Like, I'm, like, dripping,
my back is dripping sweat.
1296
01:01:54.500 --> 01:01:56.583
- [indistinct chatter]
- Hey!
1297
01:01:57.500 --> 01:02:01.833
I am sick of being treated
like some silent, invisible man.
1298
01:02:01.833 --> 01:02:05.917
I exist! And I know that you guys
don't see me around the office.
1299
01:02:06.917 --> 01:02:10.583
But you're gonna see me
tomorrow night on television.
1300
01:02:10.875 --> 01:02:12.917
- Book it, Mercedes!
- [telephone clatters]
1301
01:02:13.042 --> 01:02:15.917
["edamame" playing]
1302
01:02:16.042 --> 01:02:18.125
♪ Balls hanging low
while I pop a bottle off a yacht ♪
1303
01:02:18.125 --> 01:02:20.458
♪ Chain swanging
cling-clang and it cost a lot ♪
1304
01:02:20.583 --> 01:02:22.625
♪ Bitch, I'm always at the guala, yeah
and you are not ♪
1305
01:02:22.792 --> 01:02:24.958
♪ Badass B
keep on going 'til you hit the spot ♪
1306
01:02:25.083 --> 01:02:26.792
♪ Whoa, I'm a big bag hunter
with the bow... ♪
1307
01:02:26.792 --> 01:02:30.042
- [sighs] I'm coming for you, Linguini.
- ♪ She got a big bad dumper, drop it low ♪
1308
01:02:30.042 --> 01:02:32.250
♪ Mama called me
and she happy with the growth ♪
1309
01:02:32.250 --> 01:02:34.833
♪ Never ever fold for a thottie
that's an oath ♪
1310
01:02:35.000 --> 01:02:37.167
♪ Just popped her kidney
I bought a million options of the stock ♪
1311
01:02:37.167 --> 01:02:38.250
[kids chuckling]
1312
01:02:38.250 --> 01:02:41.208
♪ Man, I rock arenas, bringin' the peace
I'm bumpin' that 'Pac in the car ♪
1313
01:02:41.208 --> 01:02:43.417
♪ Pretendin' I got all the eyes on me
got a bad baby... ♪
1314
01:02:43.417 --> 01:02:44.833
- [Wendy] Hi.
- [door closing]
1315
01:02:46.208 --> 01:02:47.833
- Danielle!
- Wendy.
1316
01:02:47.833 --> 01:02:50.917
- Wendy!
- I wanted to give you this as a thank you.
1317
01:02:51.542 --> 01:02:52.750
For what?
1318
01:02:52.958 --> 01:02:56.750
You inspired me. I convinced my boss
to let me take over the pastries.
1319
01:02:57.250 --> 01:03:01.042
- [chuckles] What?
- You changed my life, Janet.
1320
01:03:02.125 --> 01:03:03.167
It's Jenny.
1321
01:03:04.875 --> 01:03:05.958
Raspberry fennel.
1322
01:03:05.958 --> 01:03:07.708
♪ Feel so hot like
I'm chillin' on the beach ♪
1323
01:03:07.833 --> 01:03:10.125
♪ Yeah, baby in the sun
like the Teletubbies ♪
1324
01:03:10.125 --> 01:03:11.208
♪ Whoa ♪
1325
01:03:11.208 --> 01:03:13.000
♪ I'm a big bag hunter with the bow ♪
1326
01:03:13.125 --> 01:03:15.333
♪ She got a big bad dumper, drop it low ♪
1327
01:03:15.333 --> 01:03:17.583
♪ Mama called me
and she happy with the growth ♪
1328
01:03:17.583 --> 01:03:19.375
♪ Never ever fold for a thottie
that's an oath ♪
1329
01:03:19.375 --> 01:03:22.208
- [woman] Hey, girls. That's enough.
- [kids clamoring]
1330
01:03:24.333 --> 01:03:27.917
- What now?
- I need you to come with me to California.
1331
01:03:28.083 --> 01:03:30.500
- What are you vaping? No!
- No. I need a partner
1332
01:03:30.500 --> 01:03:34.625
in case the coin flip lands on "Show It"
and I don't have anybody else.
1333
01:03:35.958 --> 01:03:37.583
Well, what the hell is "Show It"?
1334
01:03:38.250 --> 01:03:39.583
["SHAKE THAT BRASS" playing]
1335
01:03:39.583 --> 01:03:41.083
You are strong.
1336
01:03:41.417 --> 01:03:46.208
♪ Better get that brass ready, huh
Here we go, hey ♪
1337
01:03:47.625 --> 01:03:48.625
♪ Hey! ♪
1338
01:03:51.417 --> 01:03:54.083
- ♪ Hey! ♪
- ♪ Shake that brass, stop ♪
1339
01:03:54.083 --> 01:03:59.375
[rapping in Korean]
1340
01:04:05.208 --> 01:04:06.375
[in English] I'm here to see Ken.
1341
01:04:07.250 --> 01:04:09.083
♪ Get on the floor, shake that brass ♪
1342
01:04:09.083 --> 01:04:11.000
[rapping in Korean]
1343
01:04:11.000 --> 01:04:12.500
[in English] ♪ I get down, down, baby ♪
1344
01:04:12.958 --> 01:04:16.833
[rapping in Korean]
1345
01:04:18.750 --> 01:04:20.375
[Mr. Linguini snores]
1346
01:04:23.417 --> 01:04:24.750
[in English] ♪ Shake that brass ♪
1347
01:04:24.750 --> 01:04:26.083
[song concludes]
1348
01:04:26.083 --> 01:04:27.750
- Who the hell is this?
- [dog growls]
1349
01:04:27.750 --> 01:04:29.583
Crystal's other daughter.
1350
01:04:30.125 --> 01:04:32.708
- How'd you find me?
- My ex-boyfriend's CIA.
1351
01:04:32.708 --> 01:04:35.167
[scoffs] Coming here was a big mistake.
1352
01:04:35.167 --> 01:04:38.375
I will get you the money, but first,
you're gonna give me back that dog.
1353
01:04:38.375 --> 01:04:40.125
- [men laughing]
- [scoffs]
1354
01:04:40.125 --> 01:04:42.083
- Actually, we're gonna break your arms.
- [intense music playing]
1355
01:04:42.083 --> 01:04:43.167
[yelps]
1356
01:04:43.167 --> 01:04:46.000
I'll... I'll... I'll... I'll...
I'll pay you double. I swear, I swear.
1357
01:04:46.000 --> 01:04:48.875
I'm about to get a very large
cash settlement from Choochie's!
1358
01:04:48.875 --> 01:04:49.958
You know, Choochie's,
1359
01:04:49.958 --> 01:04:51.250
- the nationwide chain.
- [laughs]
1360
01:04:51.250 --> 01:04:53.000
- [men laughing]
- Oh, my God, you're so sweaty.
1361
01:04:53.000 --> 01:04:55.208
- [grunts]
- You're just like your mom.
1362
01:04:55.375 --> 01:04:57.833
- That crazy crying. That screaming.
- [shrieks] No, no, no!
1363
01:04:57.833 --> 01:05:00.042
You really think you're gonna bail her out
with that same bullshit?
1364
01:05:02.000 --> 01:05:05.250
I am not my mom.
And I am not here for her.
1365
01:05:06.417 --> 01:05:07.625
I'm here for Anne,
1366
01:05:07.625 --> 01:05:11.083
and that dog has been
by her side for the last 20 years.
1367
01:05:11.375 --> 01:05:13.458
- What? How old is he?
- Old!
1368
01:05:14.542 --> 01:05:17.750
Yes, Annie is an anxious,
sweaty little weirdo,
1369
01:05:18.042 --> 01:05:21.000
but she is my sister. And she needs me.
1370
01:05:22.125 --> 01:05:24.583
So, I need that dog.
1371
01:05:27.542 --> 01:05:29.333
Just like you need my money.
1372
01:05:29.667 --> 01:05:32.125
- Oh, I've done my research, right?
- [men murmuring]
1373
01:05:32.125 --> 01:05:34.375
- We Asians like our research, right?
- [suspenseful music playing]
1374
01:05:34.375 --> 01:05:38.792
And you're, like, what,
six months behind on rent? [chuckles] Oh.
1375
01:05:38.792 --> 01:05:42.208
I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.
Did you... did you boys not know?
1376
01:05:44.958 --> 01:05:50.083
Shame. Where did all of the money go, hmm?
Up your nose? On your tats?
1377
01:05:50.083 --> 01:05:52.083
- In your man buns?
- It's the dogs.
1378
01:05:54.125 --> 01:05:56.500
These people, they're monsters.
1379
01:05:57.125 --> 01:05:59.042
Half of them never come back
for their dogs.
1380
01:05:59.042 --> 01:06:01.875
Oh, and the purebreds,
they have issues, you know?
1381
01:06:01.875 --> 01:06:05.625
Skin problems,
kidney problems, anxiety. [scoffing]
1382
01:06:06.042 --> 01:06:08.917
My poor Crispy over there
needs constant attention or he gets sad.
1383
01:06:08.917 --> 01:06:12.000
- [pants]
- I'm all they've got.
1384
01:06:13.333 --> 01:06:17.708
Give me back Linguini, and when my big,
fat Choochie's check comes in,
1385
01:06:17.708 --> 01:06:19.708
I'll solve all your money problems.
1386
01:06:21.375 --> 01:06:22.583
Do we have a deal?
1387
01:06:22.917 --> 01:06:26.042
- [men laughing]
- [laughs] Nope.
1388
01:06:26.042 --> 01:06:27.292
["SHAKE THAT BRASS" playing]
1389
01:06:27.292 --> 01:06:28.375
[dogs barking]
1390
01:06:28.375 --> 01:06:29.625
[Ken] She took my dog!
1391
01:06:31.208 --> 01:06:32.667
♪ Shake that brass ♪
1392
01:06:32.958 --> 01:06:37.500
- ♪ Hey, ho, hey, ho, hey, ho ♪
- ♪ Yeah, uh-huh ♪
1393
01:06:37.500 --> 01:06:38.750
- ♪ Yeah ♪
- ♪ Hey, ho... ♪
1394
01:06:38.750 --> 01:06:43.792
Get them, you idiots!
That's my dog! Porky! Porky!
1395
01:06:43.958 --> 01:06:47.792
[indistinct chatter]
1396
01:06:49.458 --> 01:06:50.458
[Anne] Francine!
1397
01:06:52.292 --> 01:06:55.417
Jesus! Why is this going so fast?
A person could get killed in this.
1398
01:06:55.417 --> 01:06:57.708
- Gotta keep up.
- Okay, all right.
1399
01:06:59.333 --> 01:07:00.333
Francine.
1400
01:07:03.000 --> 01:07:07.125
Hi. I... have a plus one.
1401
01:07:07.125 --> 01:07:09.208
So glad you all found the place okay.
1402
01:07:09.208 --> 01:07:11.750
Now, if you'll follow me,
I'll show you to the green room.
1403
01:07:11.875 --> 01:07:14.417
I don't care what color it is
as long as there's a chair in it.
1404
01:07:14.417 --> 01:07:18.875
[chuckles] For sure. And, Anne,
we're gonna get you into hair and makeup.
1405
01:07:19.917 --> 01:07:22.042
[gentle music playing]
1406
01:07:22.625 --> 01:07:23.667
Isn't that amazing?
1407
01:07:23.667 --> 01:07:25.083
You know he's never worn
the same one twice.
1408
01:07:25.083 --> 01:07:26.833
- [indistinct clamor]
- [Terry] What is the lightest element...
1409
01:07:26.833 --> 01:07:28.792
- [Anne's dad] I want a divorce!
- ...on the periodic table?
1410
01:07:28.792 --> 01:07:29.917
[door slamming]
1411
01:07:30.208 --> 01:07:33.458
What? You've never seen a tie before?
Let's go.
1412
01:07:36.417 --> 01:07:37.625
[Glenn] We're on in ten.
1413
01:07:38.167 --> 01:07:39.375
You're all mic'd up.
1414
01:07:40.000 --> 01:07:41.292
- [sighs]
- [Glenn] Getting closer, people.
1415
01:07:41.292 --> 01:07:42.417
Getting closer.
1416
01:07:45.167 --> 01:07:48.458
Get away from my makeup.
Just kidding. Hi, I'm Ron. How are you?
1417
01:07:48.458 --> 01:07:50.167
Nice to meet you. I'd shake your hand but...
1418
01:07:50.667 --> 01:07:52.583
- Anyway. How was your flight? Great?
- [sighs]
1419
01:07:52.583 --> 01:07:55.875
- Great. Listen, I want to apologize.
- [crew member 1] Big night, Ron.
1420
01:07:56.083 --> 01:07:57.375
- [crew member 2] You got this!
- Why?
1421
01:07:57.583 --> 01:08:01.125
Uh. Well, because-- Well,
you're obviously a huge fan of the show,
1422
01:08:01.125 --> 01:08:03.667
and I just think it's a bummer
that you finally get to be here,
1423
01:08:03.667 --> 01:08:05.917
and tonight's gonna be all about me
winning the 84th game,
1424
01:08:05.917 --> 01:08:09.458
becoming the longest running champion.
I'm very sorry. It's very unfair to you.
1425
01:08:12.208 --> 01:08:13.458
Do you wanna be Terry?
1426
01:08:14.000 --> 01:08:17.708
Is that why you're always tryna act nice
'cause you wanna take over the show?
1427
01:08:18.125 --> 01:08:23.292
Whoa, whoa, whoa. [chuckles]
Terry is beloved by the entire world.
1428
01:08:23.292 --> 01:08:25.333
I'd be insane to try to think
I could fill his shoes.
1429
01:08:25.333 --> 01:08:27.458
- [gasps]
- [Ron] And I'm not pretending to be nice.
1430
01:08:27.458 --> 01:08:29.292
I really am nice. Ask anybody here.
1431
01:08:29.625 --> 01:08:31.583
- I'm nice.
- [crew member 3] Sure thing, Ron.
1432
01:08:31.875 --> 01:08:33.333
[Ron] Well, anyhow,
I'll let you get to it.
1433
01:08:33.333 --> 01:08:34.833
I know you gotta get
through hair and makeup.
1434
01:08:34.833 --> 01:08:36.083
I already went through hair and makeup.
1435
01:08:36.083 --> 01:08:39.333
Well, then you missed a spot.
And I'll let you change and, uh--
1436
01:08:39.333 --> 01:08:40.958
Hey! Speak of the devil, or the angel.
1437
01:08:41.333 --> 01:08:43.375
- [uplifting music playing]
- Hi, Anne. I'm Terry.
1438
01:08:43.708 --> 01:08:45.000
Welcome to the show.
1439
01:08:45.292 --> 01:08:49.917
- [over TV] Welcome to the show.
- [audience applauding over TV]
1440
01:08:50.042 --> 01:08:52.458
- Your video was very impressive.
- Freakishly great.
1441
01:08:52.458 --> 01:08:54.000
- [blows air]
- Hi, Ron.
1442
01:08:54.000 --> 01:08:55.625
[Glenn] Two minutes. Places, everyone.
1443
01:08:55.625 --> 01:08:58.208
- Okay, see you on stage.
- Thank you.
1444
01:08:59.125 --> 01:09:01.333
Remember, we're here
to learn and have fun.
1445
01:09:01.333 --> 01:09:02.625
Don't worry about winning.
1446
01:09:04.750 --> 01:09:06.375
I have to win to save my dog.
1447
01:09:09.083 --> 01:09:11.750
I have no idea what that means,
but I'll see you out there!
1448
01:09:12.917 --> 01:09:14.167
[audience cheering, applauding]
1449
01:09:14.167 --> 01:09:16.292
[announcer]
Here he is, folks, Terry McTeer.
1450
01:09:16.292 --> 01:09:19.542
[audience cheering]
1451
01:09:31.500 --> 01:09:32.917
[audience member] We love you, Terry!
1452
01:09:32.917 --> 01:09:35.667
Hello, folks. Ready to learn
and have some fun?
1453
01:09:35.667 --> 01:09:37.833
- [audience cheering]
- Come on up.
1454
01:09:38.917 --> 01:09:41.500
[Glenn] Places, everybody. Places.
1455
01:09:48.333 --> 01:09:50.375
- [supporter 1] We love you!
- [supporter 2] You got this!
1456
01:09:50.500 --> 01:09:51.833
- All right!
- Yes!
1457
01:09:52.500 --> 01:09:53.875
[Glenn] Standby lights to half.
1458
01:10:02.042 --> 01:10:06.167
It's seven o'clock on a weeknight,
you know what that means. It's time for...
1459
01:10:06.167 --> 01:10:08.583
[audience] Can't Stop the Quiz!
1460
01:10:08.708 --> 01:10:10.167
[cheering, applauding]
1461
01:10:10.167 --> 01:10:13.125
Come on, Quiz Lady. Let's do this.
1462
01:10:15.917 --> 01:10:17.750
Godspeed, Miss Yum.
1463
01:10:18.417 --> 01:10:20.875
I swear, they changed the breading
on these mozzarella sticks again.
1464
01:10:21.000 --> 01:10:22.875
- [Terry] Let's meet tonight's contestants.
- Shit!
1465
01:10:23.083 --> 01:10:25.458
[audience cheering, applauding]
1466
01:10:25.458 --> 01:10:28.917
Of course, we all know
our returning champion, Ron Heacock,
1467
01:10:28.917 --> 01:10:30.833
who's going for the record tonight.
1468
01:10:31.250 --> 01:10:32.792
- Oh, is that tonight?
- [audience chuckling]
1469
01:10:33.167 --> 01:10:34.875
And I see you've stolen my look.
1470
01:10:35.250 --> 01:10:37.458
Well, it's a big night, Terry.
I wanted to honor you.
1471
01:10:37.583 --> 01:10:39.000
- [audience] Aw!
- Well, thank you.
1472
01:10:39.125 --> 01:10:41.792
Also, joining us tonight
is someone you might recognize
1473
01:10:41.792 --> 01:10:45.042
from your computers,
the famous Quiz Lady. Welcome, Anne.
1474
01:10:45.208 --> 01:10:46.375
Thanks, Dad.
1475
01:10:47.042 --> 01:10:48.292
- I'm sorry?
- What?
1476
01:10:48.958 --> 01:10:51.333
- Welcome.
- [audience applauding]
1477
01:10:51.333 --> 01:10:55.875
And welcome Leah from Guam.
What a journey. Best of luck.
1478
01:10:56.458 --> 01:10:58.125
Let's see tonight's categories.
1479
01:10:58.125 --> 01:11:01.875
Music, books, life science, sports,
1480
01:11:02.000 --> 01:11:03.667
- fun and games, mechanics...
- [heart thumping]
1481
01:11:03.792 --> 01:11:06.875
- ...food and drink, geology, and language.
- [Mr. Linguini pants]
1482
01:11:10.583 --> 01:11:13.333
May I have five minutes
on the clock, please?
1483
01:11:13.958 --> 01:11:16.458
- And your time starts now!
- [bell dinging]
1484
01:11:16.458 --> 01:11:18.042
The Striding Man is the logo
1485
01:11:18.042 --> 01:11:19.375
- of what spirits company?
- Johnnie...
1486
01:11:19.583 --> 01:11:20.958
- [buzzer beeping]
- Ron.
1487
01:11:21.333 --> 01:11:22.792
- Johnnie Walker.
- [bell dinging]
1488
01:11:23.208 --> 01:11:25.708
- Correct. Who wrote Jane Eyre?
- [buzzer beeping]
1489
01:11:25.875 --> 01:11:27.042
- Leah.
- Emily Brontë.
1490
01:11:27.042 --> 01:11:28.583
- [buzzer buzzing]
- [Terry] Oh, no.
1491
01:11:28.583 --> 01:11:29.667
- [buzzer beeping]
- [Terry] Ron?
1492
01:11:29.667 --> 01:11:31.208
Actually, it was Charlotte Brontë.
1493
01:11:31.375 --> 01:11:32.500
- The hot one.
- [bell dinging]
1494
01:11:32.625 --> 01:11:33.708
- [Terry] Correct.
- Oh...
1495
01:11:33.708 --> 01:11:35.333
[Terry] What does an oologist study?
1496
01:11:35.708 --> 01:11:36.917
Animals.
1497
01:11:37.167 --> 01:11:38.500
- [buzzer beeping]
- Oh, no.
1498
01:11:38.500 --> 01:11:39.833
- [Terry] Ron?
- Eggs.
1499
01:11:40.000 --> 01:11:41.042
- [bell dinging]
- Yes, correct.
1500
01:11:41.167 --> 01:11:43.458
- You said "oologist" on that one?
- [Terry] I did.
1501
01:11:43.458 --> 01:11:46.083
- Oh, I-- ' Cause I heard...
- She's blowing it.
1502
01:11:46.083 --> 01:11:47.958
- [Terry] Oo... Oologist.
- Mm. Mm-hmm.
1503
01:11:48.333 --> 01:11:50.417
- [inhales]
- What NBA team holds the record
1504
01:11:50.583 --> 01:11:53.458
- for most wins in a season?
- The Warriors!
1505
01:11:53.917 --> 01:11:55.167
- [blows air]
- [buzzer beeping]
1506
01:11:55.375 --> 01:11:57.125
- [Terry] Ron.
- Golden State Warriors.
1507
01:11:57.125 --> 01:11:58.542
- [bell dinging]
- Correct.
1508
01:11:58.542 --> 01:12:00.000
Go Splash Brothers. Hi, Steph.
1509
01:12:00.125 --> 01:12:01.958
- I hope he's watching.
- Oh, he is.
1510
01:12:01.958 --> 01:12:04.792
- [audience laughing, applauding]
- [buzzer beeping]
1511
01:12:04.792 --> 01:12:08.167
- Ron. Ron. Ron. Ron.
- [bell dinging]
1512
01:12:08.167 --> 01:12:09.708
[Terry] Ron's on a hot streak!
1513
01:12:09.917 --> 01:12:12.292
- Come on. Come on.
- [heart thumping]
1514
01:12:13.083 --> 01:12:16.542
What qualitative scale
is used to rate minerals
1515
01:12:16.542 --> 01:12:19.208
in terms of scratch resistance?
1516
01:12:21.708 --> 01:12:22.792
[buzzer beeping]
1517
01:12:23.083 --> 01:12:25.000
- Anne.
- Mohs Hardness Scale!
1518
01:12:25.000 --> 01:12:26.500
- [bell dinging]
- Correct!
1519
01:12:27.042 --> 01:12:29.625
- What is the only mammal that can't...
- [end of round cue]
1520
01:12:31.333 --> 01:12:35.458
Gosh, I guess we'll never know.
That's a shame. I love the animal ones.
1521
01:12:35.875 --> 01:12:38.083
Well, Leah, goodbye.
1522
01:12:38.625 --> 01:12:41.542
When we return,
Ron and Anne will compete head-to-head.
1523
01:12:41.750 --> 01:12:44.167
Don't go anywhere, I know I won't.
1524
01:12:44.917 --> 01:12:47.833
- [Glenn] And we're out.
- [audience applauding]
1525
01:12:47.833 --> 01:12:50.333
[Glenn] Resetting.
Let's clear the stage for Head to Head.
1526
01:12:50.333 --> 01:12:51.875
- [Ron] Touch-ups.
- [sighs]
1527
01:12:51.875 --> 01:12:55.125
[Ron] More contour,
I want tight little piano fingers.
1528
01:12:56.167 --> 01:12:59.375
- [exhales]
- Are you okay? You seem deeply unwell.
1529
01:12:59.375 --> 01:13:00.750
[chuckles]
1530
01:13:00.750 --> 01:13:02.542
[Jenny] Get off of me.
I need to get in there.
1531
01:13:02.542 --> 01:13:04.250
- It's an emergency.
- [security guard] Hey, lady. Stop!
1532
01:13:04.375 --> 01:13:06.250
- Oh, no.
- [Jenny] I'll sue you into oblivion.
1533
01:13:06.250 --> 01:13:08.542
'Cause he's a service dog
and he keeps me from fainting.
1534
01:13:10.625 --> 01:13:13.250
- Hey...
- Linguini...
1535
01:13:14.042 --> 01:13:15.292
Linguini...
1536
01:13:16.792 --> 01:13:17.833
Come.
1537
01:13:29.708 --> 01:13:31.083
I missed you so much.
1538
01:13:31.500 --> 01:13:32.500
- Oh, my boy.
- [groans]
1539
01:13:32.500 --> 01:13:37.833
Oh. Is that-- Oh, he smells good.
And he seems like he's been eating.
1540
01:13:37.958 --> 01:13:40.833
[pants] And I can't...
I can't believe you... you... you... you...
1541
01:13:40.833 --> 01:13:42.042
- [Jenny sighs]
- ...you got him back.
1542
01:13:42.167 --> 01:13:44.833
And it's so good that you did
because there's no chance I'm winning.
1543
01:13:44.958 --> 01:13:46.792
Quick, create a distraction,
let's do the fries thing.
1544
01:13:46.792 --> 01:13:47.917
- No, no, no.
- Just let me...
1545
01:13:47.917 --> 01:13:49.708
I'm not letting you run away from this.
1546
01:13:49.875 --> 01:13:51.833
You can do this. You know why?
1547
01:13:53.458 --> 01:13:56.125
- Because I'm strong.
- Because you know this game,
1548
01:13:56.375 --> 01:13:58.000
just like you know
literally everything else.
1549
01:13:58.000 --> 01:14:02.292
So, play the same way you always have.
Like a winner.
1550
01:14:03.208 --> 01:14:04.792
[Glenn] Thirty seconds, everybody.
1551
01:14:06.292 --> 01:14:07.292
[sighs]
1552
01:14:08.667 --> 01:14:10.000
[sighs]
1553
01:14:11.042 --> 01:14:13.667
Oh, you smell so good.
You're so cute. You're such a big boy.
1554
01:14:15.000 --> 01:14:17.750
You can't have a dog up here. Right?
1555
01:14:18.708 --> 01:14:19.708
Well, uh...
1556
01:14:20.958 --> 01:14:25.417
You know what? I want him with me
and I don't care if that's weird.
1557
01:14:26.042 --> 01:14:28.500
- [pants]
- I-- Is it... is it okay that he's with me?
1558
01:14:28.500 --> 01:14:31.458
- [Glenn] Places, everybody.
- Oh, is it okay-- Gosh, I don't know.
1559
01:14:31.458 --> 01:14:33.292
No one's ever asked that before.
1560
01:14:33.292 --> 01:14:35.167
Uh. Let me ask. Uh. Uh.
1561
01:14:35.292 --> 01:14:38.083
- Glenn, can she have...
- [Glenn] No! We're live in 15.
1562
01:14:38.083 --> 01:14:39.458
Glenn says "no."
1563
01:14:40.500 --> 01:14:42.125
- Bye-bye. Bye-bye, doggy.
- [Mr. Linguini groans]
1564
01:14:42.333 --> 01:14:45.333
Um. [pants] Hey, everybody!
1565
01:14:45.333 --> 01:14:49.333
The Quiz Lady should have
her famous Quiz Dog with her, right?
1566
01:14:49.708 --> 01:14:53.333
Quiz Dog! Quiz Dog!
Quiz Dog! Quiz Dog! Quiz Dog!
1567
01:14:53.333 --> 01:14:55.083
- Yeah! Yeah!
- [audience chanting] Quiz Dog! Quiz Dog!
1568
01:14:55.083 --> 01:14:56.750
- Quiz Dog! Quiz Dog!
- [audience] Quiz Dog! Quiz Dog!
1569
01:14:56.750 --> 01:14:59.125
- Quiz Dog! Quiz Dog! Quiz Dog!
- Quiz Dog! Quiz Dog! Quiz Dog!
1570
01:14:59.125 --> 01:15:00.333
[Glenn] Fine, the dog can stay!
1571
01:15:00.333 --> 01:15:03.542
- [audience cheering, applauding]
- Chanting always works.
1572
01:15:03.667 --> 01:15:06.083
That was thrilling.
It's like we were in a musical.
1573
01:15:06.292 --> 01:15:07.708
[Glenn] And we're live!
1574
01:15:08.792 --> 01:15:11.750
- [sighs] I got Linguini.
- No kidding.
1575
01:15:11.917 --> 01:15:13.083
[Terry] Welcome back.
1576
01:15:13.208 --> 01:15:16.167
For the Head to Head,
we have a special guest joining us.
1577
01:15:16.333 --> 01:15:19.333
- Mr. Linguini. Hello, sir.
- [audience applauding]
1578
01:15:19.792 --> 01:15:22.542
- And thank you for your service.
- [audience] Aw!
1579
01:15:22.542 --> 01:15:25.292
You know, pugs are the official dog
of the House of Orange,
1580
01:15:25.292 --> 01:15:29.417
- in the Netherlands. And in 1572 of--
- Ron, I... I'm sorry. Can't stop the quiz.
1581
01:15:29.417 --> 01:15:31.792
- Can't.
- Please select Anne's first category.
1582
01:15:31.792 --> 01:15:34.833
Hmm. How about sports?
1583
01:15:34.958 --> 01:15:36.083
- [Terry] Sports it is.
- [bell dinging]
1584
01:15:36.083 --> 01:15:38.708
Anne, please list for us NFL teams
1585
01:15:38.708 --> 01:15:41.917
- with more than one Super Bowl win.
- Shit.
1586
01:15:42.708 --> 01:15:46.375
- [Terry] Your time starts now.
- [snores]
1587
01:15:47.958 --> 01:15:51.875
- Steelers, Patriots, 49ers, Cowboys...
- [bell dinging]
1588
01:15:51.875 --> 01:15:55.208
- [crowd booing]
- ...Giants, Packers,
1589
01:15:55.375 --> 01:15:57.542
- Broncos, Raiders, Chiefs...
- [bell dinging]
1590
01:15:57.542 --> 01:15:59.000
- [chuckles]
- ...Colts, Ravens,
1591
01:15:59.000 --> 01:16:01.000
- Dolphins, Rams, Washington...
- [bell dinging]
1592
01:16:01.167 --> 01:16:03.792
- [crowd booing, cheering]
- ...Buccaneers.
1593
01:16:03.792 --> 01:16:05.875
It's a comeback jawn!
1594
01:16:06.000 --> 01:16:07.542
- [bell beeping]
- [audience applauding]
1595
01:16:08.417 --> 01:16:11.167
- All right. Ron, now to you.
- [bell dinging]
1596
01:16:11.333 --> 01:16:14.875
Please list for us
the geological eras of Earth.
1597
01:16:14.875 --> 01:16:19.375
- My pleasure. Cenozoic, Mesozoic...
- [bell dinging]
1598
01:16:19.375 --> 01:16:21.375
- ...Paleozoic, Mesoproterozoic...
- What does-- Who cares?
1599
01:16:21.542 --> 01:16:24.292
- ...uh, Neoarchean, Mesoarchean...
- [bell dinging]
1600
01:16:24.292 --> 01:16:25.875
- ...Alan-archean. Just kidding.
- [buzzer buzzing]
1601
01:16:25.875 --> 01:16:28.958
One syllable words with no rhymes. Wow.
1602
01:16:29.417 --> 01:16:32.583
- Whilst, angst, cusp, breadth...
- [bell dinging]
1603
01:16:32.750 --> 01:16:35.083
- ...ninth, glimpsed, sculpts...
- [breathes heavily] Good.
1604
01:16:35.083 --> 01:16:36.917
- ...Goonch, twelfth.
-"Goonch." Oh...
1605
01:16:37.083 --> 01:16:38.250
- [bell ringing]
- [audience applauding]
1606
01:16:38.417 --> 01:16:41.333
God, I wish I had a service dog up here.
Hey, how about it, everybody?
1607
01:16:41.625 --> 01:16:45.375
- [chants] "Ron's dog! Ron's dog!"
- [audience member coughing]
1608
01:16:45.500 --> 01:16:48.875
Playable characters in Mario Kart 64.
This is fun.
1609
01:16:48.875 --> 01:16:52.208
- Mario, Luigi...
- [bell dinging]
1610
01:16:52.208 --> 01:16:54.667
- ...Princess Peach, for the women...
- [women cheering]
1611
01:16:54.667 --> 01:16:57.208
- ...Donkey Kong, and uh, Koopa Troopa.
- [buzzer buzzing]
1612
01:16:57.333 --> 01:17:00.542
- [laughs] Bowser, moron.
- [bar patron 1] You suck, Ron!
1613
01:17:00.542 --> 01:17:02.417
Cruciferous vegetables.
1614
01:17:02.417 --> 01:17:05.458
- Broccoli, cauliflower, horseradish, kale...
- [bell dinging]
1615
01:17:05.875 --> 01:17:07.875
...cabbage, kohlrabi, bok choy.
1616
01:17:08.042 --> 01:17:10.375
- Beethoven, Mozart...
- [bell dinging]
1617
01:17:10.542 --> 01:17:12.167
- [sneezes]
- ...Salieri, Strauss.
1618
01:17:12.292 --> 01:17:14.667
- [buzzer buzzing]
- Right. He's Romantic era,
1619
01:17:14.792 --> 01:17:17.333
which one could argue
still is classical music.
1620
01:17:17.458 --> 01:17:19.542
Anyhow, now, may I, uh...
1621
01:17:20.667 --> 01:17:22.000
- [Mr. Linguini groans]
- Come here. Oh...
1622
01:17:22.125 --> 01:17:24.000
- Okay. [chuckles]
- [Terry] Hmm.
1623
01:17:24.000 --> 01:17:25.292
- Hide and seek. Haydn!
- [Anne chuckling]
1624
01:17:25.292 --> 01:17:26.833
- [bell dinging, chiming]
- [Ron] It works!
1625
01:17:26.833 --> 01:17:31.417
- Such a jerk.
- And for the bonus round, simple machines.
1626
01:17:31.583 --> 01:17:34.042
- Lever, pulley, wedge, screw...
- [bell dinging]
1627
01:17:34.042 --> 01:17:35.625
...wheel and axle, inclined plane.
1628
01:17:35.625 --> 01:17:39.542
And that's all of them!
You finished with 24 seconds remaining,
1629
01:17:39.708 --> 01:17:41.208
which means you get a bonus
1630
01:17:41.333 --> 01:17:44.875
of 12,000 dollars.
I believe that's a new record.
1631
01:17:45.375 --> 01:17:46.958
- Is that right?
- [Terry] Can we check on that?
1632
01:17:47.083 --> 01:17:49.042
- [crew members] Yeah.
- Checking. What is that?
1633
01:17:49.167 --> 01:17:50.458
I don't-- It is? It is!
1634
01:17:50.583 --> 01:17:52.167
- [audience cheering]
- [Terry] That is the highest bonus
1635
01:17:52.167 --> 01:17:53.542
in the history of the show.
1636
01:17:53.542 --> 01:17:55.167
- Way to go, Annie!
- [Terry] Congratulations, Anne!
1637
01:17:55.167 --> 01:17:57.750
- [bell dinging]
- Whoo!
1638
01:17:57.875 --> 01:17:59.167
- Oh, huzzah!
- [Anne] Thank you.
1639
01:17:59.833 --> 01:18:00.958
[Terry] What a comeback.
1640
01:18:01.083 --> 01:18:03.042
This is just like
the classic sports film,
1641
01:18:03.042 --> 01:18:06.375
Mighty Ducks 2."Ducks fly together."
1642
01:18:06.375 --> 01:18:08.000
What a wonderful message.
Have you seen it?
1643
01:18:08.417 --> 01:18:09.958
- I've seen it multiple times.
- Oh...
1644
01:18:09.958 --> 01:18:12.958
Yes, it's in my top ten.
It might be my top two.
1645
01:18:13.458 --> 01:18:14.583
I think it's my number one.
1646
01:18:14.750 --> 01:18:16.333
Will the comeback continue,
1647
01:18:16.458 --> 01:18:20.000
or will another record be broken tonight
by Ron winning his 84th game?
1648
01:18:20.000 --> 01:18:22.333
It all depends on the final round.
1649
01:18:22.500 --> 01:18:24.250
- Time for the flip.
- [audience applauding]
1650
01:18:24.250 --> 01:18:25.500
[Terry] Ron, you have the honors.
1651
01:18:25.500 --> 01:18:28.500
[upbeat music playing]
1652
01:18:29.875 --> 01:18:31.500
[Ron] Whoo! Flip it! [grunts]
1653
01:18:31.625 --> 01:18:35.458
[audience] Ten, nine, eight, seven,
1654
01:18:35.625 --> 01:18:40.917
six, five, four, three, two, one!
1655
01:18:42.167 --> 01:18:43.250
[thudding]
1656
01:18:44.542 --> 01:18:46.125
- [audience] Show it!
- Oh...
1657
01:18:46.125 --> 01:18:48.625
- [audience cheering, applauding]
- Charades.
1658
01:18:48.625 --> 01:18:53.083
When we return,
Anne and Ron will compete in "Show It."
1659
01:18:53.083 --> 01:18:55.083
- [chuckles]
- [Glenn] And we're out.
1660
01:18:55.792 --> 01:18:59.458
"Show It" is where Heacock
becomes a peacock.
1661
01:19:01.250 --> 01:19:02.292
Bart.
1662
01:19:02.417 --> 01:19:05.000
- Hmm.
- How are you, buddy?
1663
01:19:05.125 --> 01:19:06.875
- All right, let's get in sync here.
- Okay.
1664
01:19:07.042 --> 01:19:08.792
[both vocalize]
1665
01:19:19.083 --> 01:19:24.583
- Oh, no. [coughs, grunts]
- Oh, no. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...
1666
01:19:24.750 --> 01:19:28.375
No, I'm fine.
It just got down the wrong pipe.
1667
01:19:28.375 --> 01:19:29.958
- [Anne] Uh-huh.
- [grunts]
1668
01:19:30.167 --> 01:19:31.792
- I always thought you ate crackers...
- [Terry] No.
1669
01:19:31.917 --> 01:19:34.542
- ...between the commercials.
- You caught me. [chuckles]
1670
01:19:35.583 --> 01:19:37.792
My wife, Cecilia,
worries about my sugar intake,
1671
01:19:37.917 --> 01:19:40.250
so, I just... I just say they're crackers.
1672
01:19:40.458 --> 01:19:43.542
[chuckles] What are you hiding from, huh?
1673
01:19:46.917 --> 01:19:48.500
I don't know what I'm doing. [chuckles]
1674
01:19:49.792 --> 01:19:50.875
All those...
1675
01:19:52.125 --> 01:19:53.750
...people watching and...
1676
01:19:54.667 --> 01:19:55.833
I'm gonna lose.
1677
01:20:00.958 --> 01:20:02.500
[sighs, clicks tongue]
1678
01:20:02.750 --> 01:20:05.500
You know... [smacks lips, sighs]
1679
01:20:05.500 --> 01:20:07.750
...whenever I look
at this bow tie right here,
1680
01:20:07.875 --> 01:20:12.042
it makes me think of one contestant
from that night, Oscar from Texas.
1681
01:20:13.083 --> 01:20:17.542
We had a wonderful conversation
about how he makes his own jams.
1682
01:20:17.542 --> 01:20:20.875
He tries these wild combinations,
like blueberry rhubarb.
1683
01:20:22.000 --> 01:20:26.667
What? [chuckles]
And he's like an artist, but with jams.
1684
01:20:27.000 --> 01:20:30.958
Oh! This was the night
that Aparna from New Jersey
1685
01:20:30.958 --> 01:20:33.958
played her mandolin for us
during the commercial break.
1686
01:20:36.583 --> 01:20:42.833
And that night, Mike from Maine
brought me a snowball in a cooler
1687
01:20:42.833 --> 01:20:47.208
‘cause he... he remembered that I had said
I... I missed New England winters.
1688
01:20:48.000 --> 01:20:51.792
Great guy.
None of them actually won their games.
1689
01:20:51.958 --> 01:20:54.500
You know, like most contestants,
they were just here for one night, but...
1690
01:20:55.292 --> 01:20:57.000
I don't think of them as failures.
1691
01:20:58.833 --> 01:21:00.583
I'm just glad
I got a chance to talk to them,
1692
01:21:00.583 --> 01:21:02.625
and they... they got a chance to play.
1693
01:21:04.958 --> 01:21:08.083
Don't ruin what might be
your only night here
1694
01:21:08.083 --> 01:21:09.958
by making it about winning or losing.
1695
01:21:12.792 --> 01:21:14.917
Just try to think
of what you wanna remember.
1696
01:21:15.792 --> 01:21:16.875
As for me...
1697
01:21:17.792 --> 01:21:18.917
no matter who wins...
1698
01:21:20.125 --> 01:21:25.458
this one will always remind me
of Anne from Pennsylvania
1699
01:21:25.667 --> 01:21:26.875
who brought her dog.
1700
01:21:28.042 --> 01:21:31.417
- There you are. We need you on stage.
- Yeah, right away, Glenn.
1701
01:21:31.417 --> 01:21:32.750
- Thank you so much.
- [Glenn sighs]
1702
01:21:33.583 --> 01:21:35.750
It's Glenn's world
and we're all just living in it, you know?
1703
01:21:35.875 --> 01:21:38.125
- [chuckles]
- [Terry] All right. Ready?
1704
01:21:47.000 --> 01:21:49.667
- [sighs]
- [intriguing music playing]
1705
01:21:49.792 --> 01:21:52.875
And legally, you have to allow
service animals, but also,
1706
01:21:53.000 --> 01:21:54.958
- it's the right thing to do, you know?
- [crowd cheering, applauding]
1707
01:21:55.083 --> 01:21:57.083
And you know what? Not only for Anne,
but for society, as well.
1708
01:21:57.250 --> 01:21:59.542
[Mercedes] Sure, it's just that
it's clearly a fake vest, so...
1709
01:21:59.542 --> 01:22:01.625
[Jenny] I know, but what side of history
do you wanna be on?
1710
01:22:01.625 --> 01:22:03.167
[Mercedes] Okay,
you can't pull that with me.
1711
01:22:03.167 --> 01:22:06.167
You know what? I think it's probably
gonna be really great for ratings.
1712
01:22:06.167 --> 01:22:07.917
- You know what?
- I wanna change my partner.
1713
01:22:08.375 --> 01:22:09.708
- What?
- What?
1714
01:22:10.042 --> 01:22:11.417
I wanna play with my sister.
1715
01:22:12.333 --> 01:22:14.042
- Jenny.
- [Glenn] You can't do that.
1716
01:22:14.292 --> 01:22:16.708
- Glenn, it's her game. I think she can.
- [Jenny] What? Uh.
1717
01:22:16.958 --> 01:22:19.125
You want me to guess?
But I don't know anything.
1718
01:22:20.292 --> 01:22:21.292
You know me.
1719
01:22:21.292 --> 01:22:24.917
And... and win or lose,
we'll... we'll... we'll do it together.
1720
01:22:25.458 --> 01:22:29.250
- [Glenn] All right. Switch them.
- I came all this way.
1721
01:22:29.250 --> 01:22:31.875
- I know, Fran. I'm so sorry about that.
- Ma'am, this way.
1722
01:22:31.875 --> 01:22:33.958
Um. If I could get you
and Mr. Linguini to a seat?
1723
01:22:34.083 --> 01:22:35.667
- [Anne] Sorry, Francine.
- [Francine] Now, I have to watch
1724
01:22:35.667 --> 01:22:36.625
the rest of this shit.
1725
01:22:36.625 --> 01:22:38.208
She can't do that.
You can't switch partners.
1726
01:22:38.333 --> 01:22:39.375
This is so unfair.
1727
01:22:39.375 --> 01:22:41.667
What are you gonna do next?
Give her all the answers?
1728
01:22:41.875 --> 01:22:43.208
- Welcome back.
- [clears throat]
1729
01:22:43.375 --> 01:22:44.833
I hope you enjoyed your break.
1730
01:22:45.042 --> 01:22:48.083
Joining us for the final round
is Ron's friend, Bart,
1731
01:22:48.667 --> 01:22:51.083
and Anne's sister--
I'm sorry, I never got your name.
1732
01:22:51.208 --> 01:22:52.292
Oh, Jenny.
1733
01:22:52.417 --> 01:22:54.458
- [Terry] Hi, Jenny, I'm Terry.
- Oh, hello, Satan.
1734
01:22:54.583 --> 01:22:57.750
Ron and Bart are up first,
so we'll ask Anne and Jenny
1735
01:22:57.750 --> 01:22:59.625
to step on the "Show It" coin.
1736
01:23:00.458 --> 01:23:03.208
Gentlemen, take your places.
Best of luck.
1737
01:23:03.458 --> 01:23:04.667
[Ron] I'm ready, Terry.
1738
01:23:05.167 --> 01:23:09.083
- And your time starts now.
- [bell dinging]
1739
01:23:09.250 --> 01:23:13.333
- [timer ticking]
- Book. Magazine. Mag.
1740
01:23:15.958 --> 01:23:19.667
- Shopping. Cart. Mag.
- He's good.
1741
01:23:19.667 --> 01:23:21.333
- Cart. Magna Carta. Hmm.
- [bell dinging]
1742
01:23:21.333 --> 01:23:23.042
- [audience cheering, applauding]
- What's the Magna Carta?
1743
01:23:23.667 --> 01:23:26.125
Sky. Space.
1744
01:23:27.167 --> 01:23:28.333
- Dog.
- [audience laughing]
1745
01:23:28.500 --> 01:23:30.500
- [barks]
- Shut up!
1746
01:23:30.500 --> 01:23:31.708
- [Bart] Stay.
- [barks]
1747
01:23:32.875 --> 01:23:34.125
- Shun.
- [gasps]
1748
01:23:34.125 --> 01:23:35.708
Space. Stay.
1749
01:23:37.000 --> 01:23:39.000
- Shun. International Space Station.
- [bell dinging]
1750
01:23:39.000 --> 01:23:41.042
- [audience cheering, applauding]
- How... how's that possible?
1751
01:23:41.792 --> 01:23:43.792
- [Bart] Africa.
-"Africa"?
1752
01:23:44.208 --> 01:23:45.542
- Morocco.
- [gasps]
1753
01:23:45.542 --> 01:23:47.208
- [audience applauding]
- [bell dinging]
1754
01:23:47.208 --> 01:23:48.667
- Kombucha!
- [Bart] Apple cider vinegar.
1755
01:23:48.667 --> 01:23:50.042
- Oh.
- [bell dinging]
1756
01:23:51.292 --> 01:23:54.167
Woman. Thatch. Margaret Thatcher.
1757
01:23:54.167 --> 01:23:56.208
- [bell chiming]
- Hmm.
1758
01:23:56.333 --> 01:23:57.833
[Terry] And that's your time.
1759
01:23:57.833 --> 01:24:01.500
Ron, you got seven correct,
which brings your total
1760
01:24:01.875 --> 01:24:04.542
- to a whopping 61,000.
- [bell dinging]
1761
01:24:04.542 --> 01:24:06.583
- Whoo! Heck yeah, bro. Whoo!
- [Bart] Hmm.
1762
01:24:06.917 --> 01:24:08.750
But one thing stands
between you and victory.
1763
01:24:08.750 --> 01:24:11.583
Well, actually two, Anne and Jenny.
1764
01:24:11.583 --> 01:24:13.375
- [Ron] Oh, boy.
- [Terry] Come on up. Let's switch places.
1765
01:24:13.375 --> 01:24:15.625
- [crowd cheering, applauding]
- Beat that.
1766
01:24:15.625 --> 01:24:17.625
- [grunts]
- Oh, my God, are you okay?
1767
01:24:17.625 --> 01:24:19.083
- [Ron] What? What?
- [Bart] Hmm.
1768
01:24:19.208 --> 01:24:20.958
- [chuckles]
- [Terry] Anne? Jenny?
1769
01:24:21.125 --> 01:24:23.792
- Yeah?
- You need at least nine in order to win.
1770
01:24:23.958 --> 01:24:26.875
- Okay. [inhales]
- [Terry] And your time starts now.
1771
01:24:27.000 --> 01:24:30.333
- [bell dinging]
- [timer ticking]
1772
01:24:30.958 --> 01:24:35.125
[breathes heavily]
Okay, okay, okay, thinking, thinking.
1773
01:24:35.125 --> 01:24:38.125
Um. Um. A gathering. Uh.
You have a-- You... you... you have some--
1774
01:24:38.125 --> 01:24:40.917
Uh. A... an ear... ear...
ear... earache, earring, earring.
1775
01:24:40.917 --> 01:24:43.875
A gun in my ear? Earring gun.
"I can't hear," you're deaf.
1776
01:24:43.875 --> 01:24:47.167
Uh. Okay, not-- No. Don't-- Not that.
Um. A flying... a flying duck.
1777
01:24:47.292 --> 01:24:49.375
A duck... a duck. Uh.
Something is moving. What?
1778
01:24:49.875 --> 01:24:52.833
What? Do... do something else.
You're in jail, you can't get out.
1779
01:24:52.833 --> 01:24:54.167
You're The Hamburglar.
1780
01:24:54.500 --> 01:24:55.833
- [audience laughing]
- This is pathetic.
1781
01:24:55.833 --> 01:24:57.625
- [groans]
- [Jenny] Do something else!
1782
01:24:57.833 --> 01:24:59.000
Just do something else!
1783
01:25:01.125 --> 01:25:03.125
Uh. It's a... [inhales]
1784
01:25:04.250 --> 01:25:06.042
- Uncle Dong?
- [audience murmuring]
1785
01:25:06.042 --> 01:25:08.958
Okay, Uncle Dong, Uncle Dong.
Uncle-- Stock market.
1786
01:25:08.958 --> 01:25:10.042
[bell dinging]
1787
01:25:10.042 --> 01:25:14.167
Um. [chuckles]
Okay. Um. Me? Me? Praying.
1788
01:25:14.167 --> 01:25:17.000
I'm praying, I'm praying. Uh-huh. Okay.
1789
01:25:17.292 --> 01:25:19.167
- And Kristi Yamaguchi!
- Yes.
1790
01:25:19.167 --> 01:25:20.250
- [bell dinging]
- Yes.
1791
01:25:20.417 --> 01:25:21.583
[audience cheering, applauding]
1792
01:25:21.708 --> 01:25:25.083
Looking at a house.
Okay, me, me, me, me.
1793
01:25:26.125 --> 01:25:27.375
- Ketchup! [chuckles]
- [bell dinging]
1794
01:25:27.542 --> 01:25:29.000
- [audience gasping]
- What?
1795
01:25:29.000 --> 01:25:33.042
Uh. Gross, gross.
You, me, gross. Oh! The Beatles.
1796
01:25:33.042 --> 01:25:37.000
- [bell dinging]
- Yeah. Okay, uh, you, uh, banana.
1797
01:25:38.208 --> 01:25:40.750
- [chuckles] Glue stick! Glue stick!
- [bell dinging]
1798
01:25:40.958 --> 01:25:43.625
Oh, yeah, that's... that's me!
That's cheesecake!
1799
01:25:44.333 --> 01:25:45.375
I like it too.
1800
01:25:45.500 --> 01:25:47.792
Uh. The... the sad dog
from, uh, Homeward Bound.
1801
01:25:48.167 --> 01:25:49.375
- Shadow. Yes! Yes!
- [bell dinging]
1802
01:25:49.500 --> 01:25:51.375
[crowd cheering, applauding]
1803
01:25:51.375 --> 01:25:52.667
- Taking out the trash!
- [bell dinging]
1804
01:25:52.667 --> 01:25:53.792
- [both laugh]
- [audience laughing]
1805
01:25:54.333 --> 01:25:56.083
- [Jenny] Yes!
- That... that was good.
1806
01:25:56.083 --> 01:25:57.583
- Very good.
- [shushes]
1807
01:25:57.583 --> 01:25:59.167
[audience member 1] Come on, Quiz Lady!
1808
01:26:00.250 --> 01:26:01.250
One more.
1809
01:26:01.375 --> 01:26:02.417
Okay. [breathes heavily]
1810
01:26:02.542 --> 01:26:06.667
You are just, uh, so flinging.
Oh, you're gonna be strong.
1811
01:26:06.667 --> 01:26:10.750
You are-- Muscle. Muscle. Muscle.
You're like muscle... muscle lady.
1812
01:26:10.750 --> 01:26:15.167
Muscle. What? Oh, oh, oh, oh!
Muscle. A bra-- A breastplate. Breast. Uh.
1813
01:26:15.167 --> 01:26:19.542
Uh. You're like a tiger woman.
Oh! You... you're swimming. What is this?
1814
01:26:19.542 --> 01:26:22.542
Uh. Oh! Oh, yes. Uh. Okay, okay.
I'm sweating, I'm sweating.
1815
01:26:22.917 --> 01:26:26.333
[pants] Okay. Okay. You, you, you.
1816
01:26:27.625 --> 01:26:30.750
You are... [pants] ...digging a hole.
1817
01:26:30.750 --> 01:26:33.708
Digging a hole,
digging a hole, digging a hole.
1818
01:26:33.917 --> 01:26:34.917
And you...
1819
01:26:37.042 --> 01:26:38.042
shit in a hole?
1820
01:26:38.208 --> 01:26:40.083
- [audience murmuring]
- Uh. Sh... shoot in a hole?
1821
01:26:40.292 --> 01:26:45.917
Shoot in a hole? Shoot in a hole.
Okay. Me. Me and, uh, you.
1822
01:26:45.917 --> 01:26:47.708
You, me.
1823
01:26:49.375 --> 01:26:50.917
You. You.
1824
01:26:52.375 --> 01:26:53.375
Me.
1825
01:26:56.042 --> 01:26:57.583
- Hero?
- [gentle music playing]
1826
01:26:57.583 --> 01:26:59.708
[audience gasping, murmuring]
1827
01:27:03.500 --> 01:27:04.792
[bell dinging, chiming]
1828
01:27:05.167 --> 01:27:06.625
- [Terry] And time's up.
- [audience gasping]
1829
01:27:06.625 --> 01:27:09.375
- We have a new champion.
- [crowd cheering, applauding]
1830
01:27:09.875 --> 01:27:11.292
- Whoo!
- [crowd cheering, applauding]
1831
01:27:11.417 --> 01:27:12.750
Quiz Lady is my best friend.
1832
01:27:12.750 --> 01:27:16.833
- [cheers, screams] My God!
- No! No! No!
1833
01:27:17.417 --> 01:27:19.500
I'm very sorry, Terry.
I'm very sorry to do this, everybody.
1834
01:27:19.792 --> 01:27:21.292
- She cheated.
- What?
1835
01:27:21.292 --> 01:27:23.958
You brought in a dog,
you changed partners at the last second.
1836
01:27:23.958 --> 01:27:26.250
They use some kind
of ancient Chinese mind meld.
1837
01:27:26.250 --> 01:27:29.208
- [gasps] Actual racism.
- Just be honest with me, Terry.
1838
01:27:29.500 --> 01:27:30.500
You're threatened by me.
1839
01:27:30.500 --> 01:27:32.625
You wanted me to lose?
He wanted me to lose.
1840
01:27:32.750 --> 01:27:34.000
- [audience murmuring]
- Just lose with honor.
1841
01:27:34.000 --> 01:27:39.208
I can't... I can't... I can't. I am exciting.
I'm fresh. I'm popping. I'm young.
1842
01:27:39.208 --> 01:27:43.542
- And you're just a boring old man.
- [audience gasping]
1843
01:27:43.542 --> 01:27:44.833
- [Ron] Acting like you invented...
- [gasps]
1844
01:27:44.833 --> 01:27:46.667
...the bow tie. [chuckles]
1845
01:27:46.667 --> 01:27:47.833
[over TV] I'll keep going.
1846
01:27:47.833 --> 01:27:49.792
- [audience booing over cellphone]
- Mm-mm. Mm-mm.
1847
01:27:49.917 --> 01:27:51.417
- Yeah, I will say--
- I think you should stop.
1848
01:27:51.708 --> 01:27:54.208
In fact, I think you should buzz off, Ron.
1849
01:27:54.417 --> 01:27:57.625
- [audience cheering, applauding]
- [Mr. Linguini grunts]
1850
01:27:57.625 --> 01:27:59.958
- Ooh!
- Would a boring old man say that?
1851
01:28:00.792 --> 01:28:03.750
Congratulations, Anne,
you're our new Quiz Champion!
1852
01:28:04.250 --> 01:28:08.375
[cheering, applauding]
1853
01:28:08.625 --> 01:28:10.042
[sentimental music playing]
1854
01:28:11.792 --> 01:28:12.833
I'm sorry, Terry.
1855
01:28:15.583 --> 01:28:16.917
No. I... I-- Yeah.
1856
01:28:17.542 --> 01:28:18.542
[cheers]
1857
01:28:18.708 --> 01:28:20.208
Anne! Anne! Anne!
1858
01:28:20.333 --> 01:28:21.875
- [audience] Anne! Anne! Anne!
- [Terry] Join us tomorrow
1859
01:28:21.875 --> 01:28:24.833
for another night of fast facts
and live learning.
1860
01:28:24.833 --> 01:28:27.917
I'm Terry McTeer, and I'll be right-- Oh!
1861
01:28:28.083 --> 01:28:29.958
I'll be right here.
1862
01:28:30.333 --> 01:28:31.458
Have a good night.
1863
01:28:32.292 --> 01:28:35.958
[cheers, laughs] You did it!
1864
01:28:36.167 --> 01:28:37.375
- We did it.
- Win! Win!
1865
01:28:37.375 --> 01:28:39.417
- You bring me all this way...
- [chuckles]
1866
01:28:39.417 --> 01:28:42.500
...on the promise that I might get
a chance to play charades...
1867
01:28:42.500 --> 01:28:45.708
- [sighs]
- ...and it was all just a... charade.
1868
01:28:45.708 --> 01:28:48.333
Hey, if you're gonna be this miserable,
can you just, like, die?
1869
01:28:48.333 --> 01:28:50.000
- Don't.
- 'Cause you're ruining her moment.
1870
01:28:50.000 --> 01:28:55.750
Oh, moment. Look at the two of you,
running around, searching for happiness.
1871
01:28:55.750 --> 01:28:57.333
It's just deranged.
1872
01:28:57.333 --> 01:29:00.667
Just accept the fact that nothing
will make life better.
1873
01:29:00.833 --> 01:29:03.875
- Life is, and always has been a... a...
- [golf cart's horn honking]
1874
01:29:04.542 --> 01:29:06.833
[breathes shakily] ...a miracle.
1875
01:29:07.250 --> 01:29:10.875
[traditional folk music playing]
1876
01:29:21.667 --> 01:29:24.917
It's... it's... it's... it's, uh, it... it's...
1877
01:29:24.917 --> 01:29:26.625
- Who?
- [Anne] So sorry to bother you.
1878
01:29:26.625 --> 01:29:28.958
- She's a huge fan of yours.
- [Francine whimpering]
1879
01:29:29.083 --> 01:29:31.542
Uh. Maybe you can give her
a ride in your golf cart.
1880
01:29:35.333 --> 01:29:38.792
- Uh.
- Sh... she's gonna die soon.
1881
01:29:39.042 --> 01:29:41.042
- And she has this horrible disease...
- It's...
1882
01:29:41.167 --> 01:29:44.417
...where her intestines grow
like an invasive weed. It's everywhere.
1883
01:29:44.583 --> 01:29:46.333
- They kinda--
- Yeah, yeah, fine. Hop in.
1884
01:29:46.458 --> 01:29:47.458
- [Francine gasps]
- She also thinks
1885
01:29:47.458 --> 01:29:49.500
you're the Scottish actor, Alan Cumming.
Just play along with that.
1886
01:29:51.000 --> 01:29:52.833
[Francine] You're excellent
in The Good Wife.
1887
01:29:53.875 --> 01:29:55.583
You're so, so excellent.
1888
01:29:57.042 --> 01:30:00.708
- Ooh! What a bonnie lass.
- [chuckles] Oh, my God!
1889
01:30:00.708 --> 01:30:01.792
[Paul laughing]
1890
01:30:01.792 --> 01:30:03.375
- Who was that?
- [Paul] Play that bagpipe!
1891
01:30:03.375 --> 01:30:07.792
- Not Alan Cumming.
- [Paul] Oh, me pot o' gold. Lucky Charms!
1892
01:30:07.792 --> 01:30:11.958
That was a bloody good pudding.
Glengarry... [laughs]
1893
01:30:15.875 --> 01:30:20.875
[gasps] Oh! Look at it.
Oh! It's so beautiful.
1894
01:30:22.708 --> 01:30:23.833
[sighs]
1895
01:30:24.958 --> 01:30:26.583
[Jenny] Where's Burbank from here?
1896
01:30:27.083 --> 01:30:29.833
I think it's over there by the mountains.
1897
01:30:30.417 --> 01:30:31.458
[Jenny] Wow!
1898
01:30:32.125 --> 01:30:34.333
I always thought my destiny was out there.
1899
01:30:34.917 --> 01:30:36.083
Maybe it is.
1900
01:30:37.333 --> 01:30:38.333
Nah.
1901
01:30:39.833 --> 01:30:40.833
It's just Burbank.
1902
01:30:44.792 --> 01:30:46.958
I'm sorry, I left you to deal with Mom.
1903
01:30:49.917 --> 01:30:53.208
I'm sorry, I ruined our chance of living
with the cool cousins.
1904
01:30:53.208 --> 01:30:55.250
- That was not your fault.
- It was.
1905
01:30:55.250 --> 01:30:57.458
I mean, they always thought
we were the losers of the family.
1906
01:30:58.000 --> 01:30:59.042
We kind of were.
1907
01:31:01.375 --> 01:31:02.500
Not today.
1908
01:31:04.167 --> 01:31:07.833
- You're right. Not today. [chuckles]
- [laughs]
1909
01:31:07.833 --> 01:31:09.333
- Not today!
- Not today!
1910
01:31:09.458 --> 01:31:10.958
- Motherfuckers!
- Oh, okay.
1911
01:31:11.500 --> 01:31:14.208
[chuckles]
1912
01:31:17.042 --> 01:31:18.083
[geese squawking]
1913
01:31:18.083 --> 01:31:21.917
- I love you. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
- [gasps] Look, geese, geese! [chuckles]
1914
01:31:23.708 --> 01:31:25.208
I'm sorry, what were you saying?
1915
01:31:26.917 --> 01:31:28.042
I love you, Jenny.
1916
01:31:28.875 --> 01:31:31.208
[gentle music playing]
1917
01:31:33.167 --> 01:31:34.542
I love you, Annie.
1918
01:31:37.167 --> 01:31:38.208
Thank you.
1919
01:31:38.417 --> 01:31:40.833
- Did you just say, "Thank you"?
- What? Yeah. Why?
1920
01:31:41.000 --> 01:31:43.625
Come here. Come here,
I'm touching you now.
1921
01:31:43.750 --> 01:31:45.417
- No!
- You can't help it.
1922
01:31:48.125 --> 01:31:49.500
I'm so proud of you.
1923
01:31:53.375 --> 01:31:54.375
[Anne sighs] Okay.
1924
01:31:55.667 --> 01:31:59.125
You know, I, uh, I'm gonna have
to stay in California for a while.
1925
01:31:59.583 --> 01:32:01.708
[Jenny] Oh! Look at the glow up.
1926
01:32:02.500 --> 01:32:04.833
Would you wanna stay with me?
1927
01:32:05.708 --> 01:32:08.375
Just ‘cause I feel like
we make a pretty good team.
1928
01:32:09.417 --> 01:32:11.542
Uh. Yeah! We do!
1929
01:32:12.167 --> 01:32:15.417
[gasps] Oh. I can finally,
like, coordinate our outfits.
1930
01:32:15.417 --> 01:32:18.000
I have the most amazing sleeveless blazer,
it's chartreuse.
1931
01:32:18.125 --> 01:32:19.833
- No.
- [Jenny] It would be very slimming.
1932
01:32:19.833 --> 01:32:21.792
- [Anne] I don't like sleeveless.
- [Jenny] All you have to do
1933
01:32:21.792 --> 01:32:23.458
- is some pushups.
- [Anne] What do you mean?
1934
01:32:23.458 --> 01:32:25.125
[Jenny] You should work
on your arms a little bit.
1935
01:32:25.250 --> 01:32:27.208
[Anne] Are you trying to say
that I'm out of shape or something?
1936
01:32:27.208 --> 01:32:28.292
[Jenny] Yeah.
1937
01:32:28.458 --> 01:32:30.250
["Growing Up" playing]
1938
01:32:37.042 --> 01:32:38.042
[grunts]
1939
01:32:38.917 --> 01:32:41.083
- [chuckles]
- [chuckles]
1940
01:32:42.708 --> 01:32:44.417
I can't look at-- Leave it. No, no.
1941
01:32:44.417 --> 01:32:47.417
Let me have it, you go away,
and let me look at it by myself.
1942
01:32:48.000 --> 01:32:49.208
Oh, my God, look at that.
1943
01:32:49.917 --> 01:32:51.875
♪ Lean on each other ♪
1944
01:32:53.333 --> 01:32:56.417
♪ When we need some extra strength ♪
1945
01:32:56.625 --> 01:33:00.167
♪ We'll never cave or we'll never waver ♪
1946
01:33:02.750 --> 01:33:06.000
♪ And we'll always
become braver and braver ♪
1947
01:33:06.000 --> 01:33:07.708
- Whoo! [chuckles]
- [laughs]
1948
01:33:09.292 --> 01:33:12.708
♪ We'll dance like nobody's there
we'll dance without any cares ♪
1949
01:33:12.875 --> 01:33:15.375
- ♪ We'll talk 'bout problems we share ♪
- [cheers]
1950
01:33:16.042 --> 01:33:19.750
- Thanks so much. Well done. [cheers]
- ♪ We'll sing to people and show ♪
1951
01:33:19.875 --> 01:33:20.875
♪ What it means ♪
1952
01:33:20.875 --> 01:33:22.958
- ♪ To be young and growing up ♪
- [dogs barking]
1953
01:33:28.583 --> 01:33:30.917
[indistinct chatter]
1954
01:33:31.083 --> 01:33:32.750
Make way. Make way.
1955
01:33:33.083 --> 01:33:36.042
Ooh! Hot, hot, hot! Ooh!
1956
01:33:36.042 --> 01:33:37.125
Yeah.
1957
01:33:37.292 --> 01:33:40.708
We should've done this family style.
1958
01:33:41.375 --> 01:33:45.708
Good eve.
Welcome to the Ben Franklin Inn and Spa.
1959
01:33:45.708 --> 01:33:47.583
- [telephone ringing]
- [chuckles] Oh!
1960
01:33:48.000 --> 01:33:51.042
What is that sound? Is it a chirping bird?
1961
01:33:54.000 --> 01:33:55.792
Ben Franklin Inn and Spa.
1962
01:33:57.875 --> 01:34:02.250
- Hmm.
- ♪ I make as many good memories as I can ♪
1963
01:34:04.208 --> 01:34:07.250
♪ When there are nights I can't sleep
it's okay in the end ♪
1964
01:34:07.375 --> 01:34:11.292
[laughs] I'm sorry,
that was horrible phrasing.
1965
01:34:11.292 --> 01:34:15.917
♪ I know what I do now makes me, me ♪
1966
01:34:16.292 --> 01:34:22.333
♪ Wherever we go, wherever we go, we ♪
1967
01:34:23.750 --> 01:34:27.042
♪ We'll dance like nobody's there
we'll dance without any cares ♪
1968
01:34:27.167 --> 01:34:30.125
♪ We'll talk 'bout problems we share
we'll talk 'bout things that ain't fair ♪
1969
01:34:30.417 --> 01:34:33.792
♪ We'll sing 'bout things we don't know
we'll sing to people and show ♪
1970
01:34:33.792 --> 01:34:37.125
♪ What it means
to be young and growing up ♪
1971
01:34:37.125 --> 01:34:40.333
♪ We'll take the good with the bad
all of the times that we'll have ♪
1972
01:34:40.333 --> 01:34:43.667
♪ Make every moment last
we'll have each other's backs ♪
1973
01:34:43.667 --> 01:34:46.917
♪ 'Cause in the end we don't know
we don't know where we will go ♪
1974
01:34:46.917 --> 01:34:50.250
♪ We don't know
so there's still a little more ♪
1975
01:34:50.250 --> 01:34:51.625
♪ Growing up ♪
1976
01:34:56.292 --> 01:34:59.750
[curious music playing]
1977
01:38:56.042 --> 01:38:59.333
["We Got It" playing]
1978
01:38:59.333 --> 01:39:03.000
[women vocalizing]
1979
01:39:03.000 --> 01:39:04.208
♪ Hold on ♪
1980
01:39:07.917 --> 01:39:09.208
♪ Trust me, trust me, baby ♪
1981
01:39:10.125 --> 01:39:13.000
♪ Into the sky
we can, we can, we can make it ♪
1982
01:39:15.083 --> 01:39:17.750
♪ I got it, you got it, we got it ♪
1983
01:39:20.708 --> 01:39:22.417
♪ I got this under control ♪
1984
01:39:26.167 --> 01:39:29.875
♪ You can, you can, you can call me
together, unstoppable ♪
1985
01:39:29.875 --> 01:39:32.750
♪ I got it, you got it, we got it ♪
1986
01:39:32.750 --> 01:39:36.458
[women vocalizing]
1987
01:39:39.917 --> 01:39:42.375
["We Got It" concludes]