WEBVTT FILE

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Downloaded from
YTS.MX

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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX

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End of the line.

4
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Are you
the comedian?

5
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Guilty.

6
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And who might you be?

7
00:01:50.545 --> 00:01:53.243
Oh, uh, I'm Stephanie
from Ha Ha's.

8
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My uncle Phil sent me
to pick you up.

9
00:02:00.555 --> 00:02:03.775
I don't think
you're supposed to do that. - Do what?

10
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Have open liquor while driving!

11
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I'm not driving.

12
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- Here we are.
- What happened to the Holiday Inn?

13
00:02:21.010 --> 00:02:23.055
My uncle
got a better deal here.

14
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Just tell them
you're the comedian.

15
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The-- the show is at 8:00.
Should I pick you up at 7:00?

16
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- Fifty.
- It takes ten minutes to get there.

17
00:02:33.805 --> 00:02:35.067
Exactly.

18
00:02:36.634 --> 00:02:38.506
Are you ready
for your headliner?

19
00:02:38.549 --> 00:02:40.856
Awesome.

20
00:02:40.899 --> 00:02:43.902
Now, it's a real pleasure
for me to introduce this man.

21
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Real legend.

22
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Please welcome
the Road Dog himself:

23
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Jimmy Quinn!

24
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Hey, keep it going for, uh...

25
00:02:54.435 --> 00:02:57.829
a truly insignificant comedian

26
00:02:57.873 --> 00:03:00.005
whose name escapes me.

27
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My name is Jimmy,
and I'm an alcoholic.

28
00:03:06.360 --> 00:03:07.491
Wrong room?

29
00:03:31.036 --> 00:03:33.169
Go away!

30
00:03:33.213 --> 00:03:35.127
I don't need any towels.

31
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<i>No moleste.</i>

32
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I'm not the maid!

33
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God damn it.

34
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What the fuck do you want?

35
00:04:01.676 --> 00:04:03.547
Uh...

36
00:04:03.591 --> 00:04:04.853
I'm your son.

37
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One more time.

38
00:04:42.891 --> 00:04:44.545
I-- I'm your son, David.

39
00:04:48.505 --> 00:04:49.550
Fair enough.

40
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What can I do for you?

41
00:04:52.466 --> 00:04:55.033
Well, you know,
I-- I just want to meet you.

42
00:04:56.383 --> 00:04:57.601
All right.

43
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Can I take you to lunch?

44
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It's a little early for lunch.

45
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It's three in the afternoon.

46
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Ugh.

47
00:05:10.353 --> 00:05:12.660
All right.
Just give me a minute.

48
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Okay, yeah.
I'll just, uh, just...

49
00:05:16.141 --> 00:05:17.229
...wait out here.

50
00:05:26.500 --> 00:05:27.631
So, uh, you hungry?

51
00:05:31.635 --> 00:05:35.160
I'm not really a big eater.

52
00:05:35.204 --> 00:05:37.119
Right, yeah.

53
00:05:39.817 --> 00:05:41.776
I'm sorry, kid.

54
00:05:41.819 --> 00:05:45.649
You got to understand,
this is a lot to process.

55
00:05:45.693 --> 00:05:48.217
I'm sure I'm not
what you expected.

56
00:05:48.260 --> 00:05:50.915
Actually, you're exactly
what I expected.

57
00:05:50.959 --> 00:05:55.180
Uh, my mom was
very descriptive of you.

58
00:05:55.224 --> 00:05:57.879
Yeah? So how's she?

59
00:05:57.922 --> 00:05:59.837
She's good.

60
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Still married
to that plastic surgeon?

61
00:06:02.231 --> 00:06:04.581
Yeah. Almost 20 years.

62
00:06:04.625 --> 00:06:07.105
Well, good for her.
She deserves it.

63
00:06:08.585 --> 00:06:11.632
Even if she is
a giant sack of nag.

64
00:06:14.765 --> 00:06:19.683
Sorry. I shouldn't talk bad
about your mother like that, but...

65
00:06:19.727 --> 00:06:22.469
she and I
didn't really get along.

66
00:06:22.512 --> 00:06:25.341
Yeah, she doesn't have good
things to say about you either.

67
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Y'all ready to order?

68
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Yeah, I'll have the,
uh, club sandwich.

69
00:06:32.392 --> 00:06:34.742
All right. And yourself?

70
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Uh, the...

71
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"Breakfast-ival Plate"?

72
00:06:40.661 --> 00:06:44.795
I'm sorry, darlin', but we stop
serving breakfast at 11:00.

73
00:06:44.839 --> 00:06:49.147
Really? After you made me say
that?

74
00:06:49.191 --> 00:06:51.628
All right, I'll just have
whatever the kid's having.

75
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All right, two clubs.
Anything to drink? - Um, just water.

76
00:06:56.198 --> 00:06:57.808
Yeah, uh, do you serve beer?

77
00:06:57.852 --> 00:06:59.680
No, sir.

78
00:06:59.723 --> 00:07:01.377
Would you like water?

79
00:07:01.421 --> 00:07:04.598
Water. Yeah.

80
00:07:04.641 --> 00:07:08.428
- I'll give it a shot.
- All right. I'll be right back.

81
00:07:08.471 --> 00:07:12.040
It's a little early in
the morning to hear that voice.

82
00:07:19.743 --> 00:07:21.571
So...

83
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how'd you find me?

84
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I, like, looked you up online.
You know, the club had a website.

85
00:07:27.272 --> 00:07:30.450
I just went over there,
and they told me where you were.

86
00:07:31.668 --> 00:07:34.584
Again, I'm sorry, but...

87
00:07:34.628 --> 00:07:37.152
I don't know
the slightest thing about you.

88
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I haven't seen you
since you were a little kid.

89
00:07:39.502 --> 00:07:41.939
Yeah, I-- I have
no memory of you at all.

90
00:07:41.983 --> 00:07:44.594
That's exact--
that's what I'm saying. - Okay, well, okay.

91
00:07:44.638 --> 00:07:46.553
I didn't come here
to give you shit, okay?

92
00:07:46.596 --> 00:07:48.206
I really did just
want to meet you.

93
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And I was on my way to New York.

94
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You're on the way.

95
00:07:51.732 --> 00:07:52.820
So I thought, why not?

96
00:07:53.995 --> 00:07:56.432
New York? What's out there?

97
00:07:56.476 --> 00:07:58.782
Well, I actually
want to be a comedian.

98
00:08:00.654 --> 00:08:02.873
Yeah, I was going to crash
on a friend's couch

99
00:08:02.917 --> 00:08:04.179
until I find a place.

100
00:08:07.008 --> 00:08:10.011
Are you funny?

101
00:08:10.054 --> 00:08:12.448
I mean, I do open mics
for a couple of years,

102
00:08:12.492 --> 00:08:14.798
and I won
a contest at my school.

103
00:08:14.842 --> 00:08:17.584
Then you must be hilarious.

104
00:08:17.627 --> 00:08:19.150
Yeah, I was in medical school,

105
00:08:20.674 --> 00:08:22.502
until I dropped out last week.

106
00:08:22.545 --> 00:08:24.286
Why would you do that?

107
00:08:24.329 --> 00:08:26.070
Well, I told you.
I want to be comedian.

108
00:08:26.114 --> 00:08:28.769
Maybe it's genetic.

109
00:08:32.381 --> 00:08:34.949
I don't know.
What's your mother think about all this?

110
00:08:34.992 --> 00:08:38.822
As long as she doesn't know
I dropped out of school,

111
00:08:38.866 --> 00:08:39.910
we're good.

112
00:08:42.913 --> 00:08:45.873
- There you go.
- Ah, thank you.

113
00:08:45.916 --> 00:08:47.875
And I'm just gonna
leave this right here.

114
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Let me know
if you need anything else.

115
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All right, thanks.

116
00:08:51.531 --> 00:08:53.620
So you have any plans for today?

117
00:08:54.795 --> 00:08:58.799
Guess at some point I better
start working on my set.

118
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I was thinking maybe
I'd come see your show tonight,

119
00:09:01.323 --> 00:09:04.239
if that's okay. I got a spot
at the Holiday Inn. Um...

120
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Pick you up, say, before 8:00?

121
00:09:08.330 --> 00:09:09.897
Sure.

122
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All right, cool.

123
00:09:13.074 --> 00:09:15.206
No, I got this.

124
00:09:22.605 --> 00:09:26.000
...taught by years and pounds.

125
00:09:26.043 --> 00:09:27.436
Trade this thing in.

126
00:09:27.479 --> 00:09:29.569
I just...

127
00:09:30.918 --> 00:09:32.833
Your old man's
pretty funny, huh?

128
00:09:32.876 --> 00:09:34.399
Oh, yeah.

129
00:09:34.443 --> 00:09:36.793
I've been booking Jimmy
20 years now.

130
00:09:37.881 --> 00:09:41.102
I have seen 'em all,
and he is one of the best.

131
00:09:41.145 --> 00:09:42.625
Two women walked out of the show

132
00:09:42.669 --> 00:09:44.540
and complained to the manager

133
00:09:44.584 --> 00:09:47.412
that I was drunk on stage.

134
00:09:47.456 --> 00:09:48.979
I mean,

135
00:09:49.023 --> 00:09:51.286
I'm not driving a bus,
motherfucker.

136
00:09:51.329 --> 00:09:53.288
I'm a comedian.

137
00:09:53.331 --> 00:09:54.942
The jokes are coming out.

138
00:09:54.985 --> 00:09:57.640
I'm saying the same words
as if I was sober.

139
00:09:57.684 --> 00:09:59.816
Too bad the business
ain't what it used to be.

140
00:10:01.078 --> 00:10:02.166
Uh-huh.

141
00:10:04.908 --> 00:10:06.823
Never told me he had a kid.

142
00:10:10.131 --> 00:10:13.482
Folks, don't take any of this
stuff too seriously 'cause

143
00:10:13.525 --> 00:10:15.658
I don't know
if anyone ever told you,

144
00:10:15.702 --> 00:10:18.618
spoiler alert,
You die in the end.

145
00:10:18.661 --> 00:10:21.403
So, don't take any shit.
Have a great night.

146
00:10:27.017 --> 00:10:29.193
Thank you.
Jimmy Quinn, everybody.

147
00:10:29.237 --> 00:10:32.109
Hey, that was awesome!
Like, the way you worked the crowd.

148
00:10:32.153 --> 00:10:35.025
It wasn't even like you were
telling jokes, but still funny.

149
00:10:35.069 --> 00:10:36.810
Thanks, kid.

150
00:10:36.853 --> 00:10:38.725
Hey, uh, I want--

151
00:10:38.768 --> 00:10:40.901
I want to talk to you
about this little

152
00:10:40.944 --> 00:10:44.165
New York adventure
you're gonna do. - Yeah?

153
00:10:44.208 --> 00:10:46.907
What do you say we, uh,
spend a little bit more time together?

154
00:10:46.950 --> 00:10:48.648
Yeah, what do you mean?

155
00:10:48.691 --> 00:10:51.041
Well, I got a gig
coming up in South Bend,

156
00:10:51.085 --> 00:10:52.913
and I thought maybe
you'd tag along,

157
00:10:52.956 --> 00:10:56.133
show you the ropes,
maybe get you some stage time.

158
00:10:56.177 --> 00:11:00.094
Oh, man, well,
I don't have to be in New York at any specific time, so...

159
00:11:00.137 --> 00:11:02.749
All right, then it's on.
We'll have some goofs.

160
00:11:02.792 --> 00:11:04.925
I'll show you what
the road's really like.

161
00:11:04.968 --> 00:11:07.492
- Great. Yeah, that'll be fun.
- All right, hang out here.

162
00:11:07.536 --> 00:11:09.581
- I gotta get paid from Phil.
- All right, cool.

163
00:11:12.584 --> 00:11:14.586
You got a nice kid there.

164
00:11:14.630 --> 00:11:16.414
Yeah.

165
00:11:16.458 --> 00:11:18.460
Certainly thinks highly of you.

166
00:11:18.503 --> 00:11:20.984
Yeah. He doesn't know me
that well, Phil.

167
00:11:23.683 --> 00:11:25.206
How you feeling, Jimmy?

168
00:11:25.249 --> 00:11:27.948
I'm surviving.

169
00:11:27.991 --> 00:11:29.689
You-- you look
a little worn out.

170
00:11:30.777 --> 00:11:34.128
I'm a road comic. I am worn out.

171
00:11:34.171 --> 00:11:35.999
So what's the take?

172
00:11:36.043 --> 00:11:38.436
It's 500.

173
00:11:38.480 --> 00:11:40.482
Of course we have your bar tab,

174
00:11:40.525 --> 00:11:42.876
which I knocked down
to an even 100.

175
00:11:44.007 --> 00:11:47.576
And there's the 20
you borrowed from my niece.

176
00:11:47.619 --> 00:11:49.709
That brings it to 380.

177
00:11:49.752 --> 00:11:51.580
Geez.

178
00:11:51.623 --> 00:11:54.235
I made more as an opener
30 years ago.

179
00:11:54.278 --> 00:11:56.498
Listen, Jimmy, I...

180
00:11:56.541 --> 00:12:00.763
I'm afraid I...
can't give you any... more dates.

181
00:12:03.287 --> 00:12:04.985
We're closing
at the end of the month.

182
00:12:06.290 --> 00:12:08.379
- Closing?
- Yeah.

183
00:12:08.423 --> 00:12:11.339
Comedy's just not cutting it
any more and I...

184
00:12:11.382 --> 00:12:13.384
I got an offer on the place.

185
00:12:14.603 --> 00:12:17.954
They want to turn it
into a friggin' sports bar or something.

186
00:12:19.129 --> 00:12:20.652
I just couldn't say no.

187
00:12:23.090 --> 00:12:25.832
Well, another one
bites the dust.

188
00:12:28.051 --> 00:12:31.141
I don't know what to say,
but, you know,

189
00:12:31.185 --> 00:12:33.317
thanks for all the years, Phil.

190
00:12:33.361 --> 00:12:35.537
And listen, Jimmy,

191
00:12:35.580 --> 00:12:37.539
you take care of yourself, huh?

192
00:12:37.582 --> 00:12:39.541
- I'll try.
- Okay.

193
00:12:46.330 --> 00:12:47.897
All right, off to South Bend?

194
00:12:47.941 --> 00:12:50.204
Let's do it.

195
00:13:20.060 --> 00:13:21.452
I had a thought.

196
00:13:23.890 --> 00:13:26.718
Know where we can
score any ketamine?

197
00:13:26.762 --> 00:13:29.069
What?

198
00:13:29.112 --> 00:13:31.332
I'm just fucking with you.

199
00:13:31.375 --> 00:13:33.943
No, I was thinking, uh,

200
00:13:33.987 --> 00:13:37.381
we have a few days
before South Bend, do you...

201
00:13:37.425 --> 00:13:40.515
- want to take a little detour?
- Yeah, where?

202
00:13:40.558 --> 00:13:44.214
I want to show you the first
place I ever did stand-up.

203
00:13:44.258 --> 00:13:45.912
It's just outside of Chicago.

204
00:13:45.955 --> 00:13:49.132
Uh,
I can chuck you some gas money.

205
00:13:49.176 --> 00:13:51.439
Maybe get a motel for us.

206
00:13:51.482 --> 00:13:55.225
Oh, you're fine.
I got my mom's credit cards.

207
00:13:55.269 --> 00:13:57.924
Fuck it, then.
We'll get the penthouse suite.

208
00:14:19.510 --> 00:14:21.730
Oh, you're starting early, huh?

209
00:14:21.773 --> 00:14:23.471
It's my day off.

210
00:14:31.871 --> 00:14:34.003
Sure beats the hell
out of the bus.

211
00:14:35.091 --> 00:14:36.440
Yeah, I bet.

212
00:14:38.965 --> 00:14:42.142
You know, I was wondering,
uh, how come you never made it on TV?

213
00:14:42.185 --> 00:14:46.711
You know, like, I think
you're way funnier than a lot of those guys that made it big.

214
00:14:46.755 --> 00:14:50.759
That shit you see on TV
isn't real comedy.

215
00:14:50.802 --> 00:14:54.197
Real comedy's live.
You know, in the moment.

216
00:14:54.241 --> 00:14:55.720
If shit goes wrong,

217
00:14:55.764 --> 00:14:57.853
people yell shit out,
you roll with it.

218
00:14:59.594 --> 00:15:01.509
Anything can happen.

219
00:15:01.552 --> 00:15:05.730
Stuff you see on TV
is all pre-scripted.

220
00:15:05.774 --> 00:15:08.820
You have to do it
the way they want you to do it.

221
00:15:08.864 --> 00:15:11.127
Yeah, but you know,
you're still doing your act

222
00:15:11.171 --> 00:15:13.173
and you can be seen
by more people.

223
00:15:13.216 --> 00:15:16.959
That's gotta help with, you
know, bookings and money, right?

224
00:15:17.003 --> 00:15:19.919
You want money,
you stay in med school.

225
00:15:19.962 --> 00:15:22.573
You don't get into comedy
for money.

226
00:15:22.617 --> 00:15:25.837
And if you really
want to do this, you have to make a decision.

227
00:15:25.881 --> 00:15:30.190
Do you-- do you want to be some
shiny game show host comic on TV,

228
00:15:30.233 --> 00:15:34.977
or do you want to be a real
legitimate, great stand-up?

229
00:15:35.021 --> 00:15:37.632
There's guys on TV
who are funny.

230
00:15:37.675 --> 00:15:39.329
Name two.

231
00:15:39.373 --> 00:15:41.114
Listen,

232
00:15:41.157 --> 00:15:45.509
I haven't had a day job
in over 30 years.

233
00:15:45.553 --> 00:15:47.685
I go on that stage,
I'm the talent,

234
00:15:47.729 --> 00:15:50.427
I'm the writer,
I'm the director.

235
00:15:50.471 --> 00:15:54.605
I go up, I work an hour a night
with a cocktail in my hand.

236
00:15:54.649 --> 00:15:56.651
And if the customer
doesn't like it,

237
00:15:56.694 --> 00:15:59.915
I tell the customer
to go fuck himself.

238
00:15:59.959 --> 00:16:01.612
Top that for a living.

239
00:16:04.354 --> 00:16:05.442
Yeah.

240
00:16:36.952 --> 00:16:38.998
This is where you started?

241
00:16:39.041 --> 00:16:41.957
That's where--
where it used to be.

242
00:16:43.132 --> 00:16:46.309
It was a little hole in the wall
called The Purple Fox.

243
00:16:46.353 --> 00:16:48.572
It wasn't much, but, uh...

244
00:16:48.616 --> 00:16:51.097
basically where my life
got started.

245
00:16:51.140 --> 00:16:54.752
Well, how'd you start here?
I thought you grew up in Boston.

246
00:16:54.796 --> 00:16:59.105
I left early.
I left when I was 17, joined the Navy.

247
00:16:59.148 --> 00:17:02.282
Came out here for boot camp.
Lasted for about six weeks,

248
00:17:02.325 --> 00:17:05.589
and they had enough of me,
so then I just bummed around.

249
00:17:05.633 --> 00:17:08.853
Got a job here as a fry cook
at The Fox, and...

250
00:17:08.897 --> 00:17:10.681
we started doing stand-up.

251
00:17:10.725 --> 00:17:13.293
Comedy night turned into
five nights a week

252
00:17:13.336 --> 00:17:16.905
and I'd just sit in the back
stoned and watch comics going,

253
00:17:16.948 --> 00:17:18.428
"I could do this shit."

254
00:17:19.516 --> 00:17:20.865
What was your first time like?

255
00:17:22.867 --> 00:17:26.915
First night was, uh,
it was Labor Day weekend, so the place is packed.

256
00:17:26.958 --> 00:17:28.482
And I was terrified.

257
00:17:28.525 --> 00:17:31.572
I just hammered shots
to loosen up.

258
00:17:31.615 --> 00:17:33.791
And I went on stage.

259
00:17:33.835 --> 00:17:36.142
And I had nothing.
And I was dying.

260
00:17:36.185 --> 00:17:38.622
And I made the classic mistake
that comics make.

261
00:17:38.666 --> 00:17:42.017
And I asked the audience,
"Hey, what do you guys wanna talk about?"

262
00:17:42.061 --> 00:17:45.151
And some beautiful asshole
in the back yells out,

263
00:17:45.194 --> 00:17:47.414
"Talk about sex!"

264
00:17:47.457 --> 00:17:49.894
And I said the first thing
that went through my head,

265
00:17:49.938 --> 00:17:52.462
I said, "Your parents
shouldn't have had any!"

266
00:17:52.506 --> 00:17:55.813
It wasn't genius, but it killed.

267
00:17:55.857 --> 00:17:57.728
So after that I was hooked.

268
00:18:00.862 --> 00:18:03.299
There ought to be a plaque here.

269
00:18:03.343 --> 00:18:05.649
A lot of funny comics
started here.

270
00:18:05.693 --> 00:18:06.781
Like who?

271
00:18:08.435 --> 00:18:10.176
Uh, Emo Philips.

272
00:18:10.219 --> 00:18:12.700
Uh, Larry Reeb.

273
00:18:12.743 --> 00:18:14.702
Paul Kelly.

274
00:18:14.745 --> 00:18:15.964
Will Richards.

275
00:18:16.007 --> 00:18:17.357
Will Richards?

276
00:18:17.400 --> 00:18:18.836
He started here?

277
00:18:18.880 --> 00:18:21.622
Yeah, he was my opening act.

278
00:18:21.665 --> 00:18:23.014
I give him his start.

279
00:18:23.058 --> 00:18:24.146
Really?

280
00:18:26.235 --> 00:18:27.889
Yeah, really.

281
00:18:32.285 --> 00:18:34.461
There's an open mic
in the city tonight

282
00:18:34.504 --> 00:18:36.158
I'm gonna go perform at.

283
00:18:36.202 --> 00:18:39.030
You wanna come with?
Maybe even do a set?

284
00:18:40.162 --> 00:18:43.034
Nah,
I'm just gonna sprawl out here

285
00:18:43.078 --> 00:18:45.515
and work on some material,
maybe.

286
00:18:45.559 --> 00:18:47.604
But you go ahead.

287
00:18:51.130 --> 00:18:52.348
All right.

288
00:18:57.527 --> 00:18:59.442
Well, let me know
if you change your mind.

289
00:18:59.486 --> 00:19:01.618
I can come back and get you.
Just give me a call.

290
00:19:02.967 --> 00:19:06.101
I got everything
I need right here, but...

291
00:19:06.145 --> 00:19:07.189
have fun.

292
00:19:08.756 --> 00:19:09.844
Okay.

293
00:20:13.124 --> 00:20:14.822
You're a fucking idiot.

294
00:20:19.653 --> 00:20:21.742
Um, room 249.

295
00:20:21.785 --> 00:20:26.050
Right, that was a--
a non-smoking room?

296
00:20:27.574 --> 00:20:31.491
Uh, yeah.
You might find there's a little problem with the mirror.

297
00:20:31.534 --> 00:20:33.841
Oh, I'm sorry.

298
00:20:33.884 --> 00:20:36.017
What was the problem?

299
00:20:36.060 --> 00:20:37.627
Uh, just like
a slight crack in it.

300
00:20:37.671 --> 00:20:38.976
Uh-huh.

301
00:20:39.020 --> 00:20:41.457
Um, how did that happen?

302
00:20:42.850 --> 00:20:44.852
I just look terrible
in the morning.

303
00:20:44.895 --> 00:20:47.420
I-- I doubt that.

304
00:20:48.856 --> 00:20:50.553
So is, uh...

305
00:20:50.597 --> 00:20:52.120
is that gonna cost
a lot of money,

306
00:20:52.163 --> 00:20:53.208
Heather?

307
00:20:54.775 --> 00:20:58.257
I am sure it was like that
when you checked in.

308
00:20:58.300 --> 00:20:59.954
Yeah.

309
00:20:59.997 --> 00:21:02.304
You are all set. Um...

310
00:21:02.348 --> 00:21:04.785
please come back
and see us soon.

311
00:21:04.828 --> 00:21:06.569
Thanks. I hope to.

312
00:21:08.267 --> 00:21:09.877
Nicely done.

313
00:21:14.403 --> 00:21:17.101
So I, uh, got up
at that open mic last night.

314
00:21:17.145 --> 00:21:20.931
- Fantastic.
- Yeah, I wish you could've been there.

315
00:21:20.975 --> 00:21:23.499
So, uh, who was that
with you in that picture?

316
00:21:26.328 --> 00:21:30.201
Oh, that was just, uh,
just a girl.

317
00:21:30.245 --> 00:21:32.682
Nosy feller, aren't ya?

318
00:21:32.726 --> 00:21:36.773
Well, you guys
look really happy. Was it, you know, serious?

319
00:21:36.817 --> 00:21:38.906
Define "happy."

320
00:21:38.949 --> 00:21:41.430
But, uh, that was
a long time ago.

321
00:21:42.431 --> 00:21:46.348
Well... ...you don't
wanna talk about the picture. That's-- that's fine.

322
00:21:46.392 --> 00:21:48.437
Did it have anything to do
with the broken mirror?

323
00:21:51.788 --> 00:21:53.573
- Shit.
- Who is it?

324
00:21:53.616 --> 00:21:54.878
It's Mom.

325
00:21:54.922 --> 00:21:56.184
Ugh!

326
00:21:58.708 --> 00:22:00.231
Hey, Mom.

327
00:22:00.275 --> 00:22:02.146
Good!

328
00:22:02.190 --> 00:22:04.366
Yeah, here just studying.

329
00:22:04.410 --> 00:22:05.628
Where?

330
00:22:05.672 --> 00:22:07.500
Uh, in my dorm room, you know?

331
00:22:07.543 --> 00:22:09.806
- Where else would I be?
- Oh, yeah? Really?

332
00:22:09.850 --> 00:22:11.678
Because I just left
your dorm room,

333
00:22:11.721 --> 00:22:13.810
<i>and unless you're napping</i>
<i>in the mini fridge,</i>

334
00:22:13.854 --> 00:22:16.247
<i>I didn't see you.</i>
<i>As a matter of fact,</i>

335
00:22:16.291 --> 00:22:19.860
<i>your roommate, Rajesh told me</i>
<i>you dropped out of school.</i>

336
00:22:19.903 --> 00:22:22.079
<i>Do you mind telling me</i>
<i>where you are?</i>

337
00:22:22.123 --> 00:22:24.081
<i>And just what the hell</i>
<i>is going on?</i>

338
00:22:25.648 --> 00:22:28.564
Uh, well, you know what?

339
00:22:28.608 --> 00:22:31.350
Yeah. Yeah, I did drop out
of school to become a comedian.

340
00:22:31.393 --> 00:22:34.265
And, in fact, I'm here right now

341
00:22:34.309 --> 00:22:35.789
with someone you may know.

342
00:22:37.138 --> 00:22:41.534
- Your ex, my dad, Jimmy.
<i>- What?</i>

343
00:22:41.577 --> 00:22:44.798
In fact, we're right--
right now we're on our way to South Bend

344
00:22:44.841 --> 00:22:46.582
where Jimmy's
performing tonight.

345
00:22:46.626 --> 00:22:49.193
Put him on the phone
this second!

346
00:22:50.673 --> 00:22:53.676
Um, she's really excited
to talk to you.

347
00:22:53.720 --> 00:22:54.938
Oh, joy.

348
00:23:00.727 --> 00:23:03.294
Hello, Denise. How you been?

349
00:23:03.338 --> 00:23:05.296
I don't know what you
think you're doing,

350
00:23:05.340 --> 00:23:07.864
but you send him back
this instant.

351
00:23:07.908 --> 00:23:10.171
Hey, I-- I had nothing
to do with this.

352
00:23:10.214 --> 00:23:12.478
- He showed up at my door--
<i>- Shut up!</i>

353
00:23:12.521 --> 00:23:14.958
<i>Do you honestly think I'm gonna</i>
<i>let you drag him down</i>

354
00:23:15.002 --> 00:23:16.873
<i>into the gutter</i>
<i>and be a loser like you</i>

355
00:23:16.917 --> 00:23:18.397
<i>for the rest of his life?</i>

356
00:23:19.441 --> 00:23:21.878
He's a big boy, Denise.
He can make his own decision.

357
00:23:21.922 --> 00:23:24.315
I should've known you had
something to do with this!

358
00:23:24.359 --> 00:23:27.928
<i>You bring nothing</i>
<i>but destruction</i> <i>to everything you touch!</i>

359
00:23:27.971 --> 00:23:30.191
<i>Well, you're not</i>
<i>gonna ruin his life</i>

360
00:23:30.234 --> 00:23:32.889
<i>any more than you already have.</i>

361
00:23:32.933 --> 00:23:35.370
All right, Denise, it was
a pleasure talking to you.

362
00:23:35.414 --> 00:23:37.459
I'm gonna turn you
back over to David now.

363
00:23:37.503 --> 00:23:39.809
But we should--
we should talk again real soon.

364
00:23:39.853 --> 00:23:41.028
Bye-bye now.

365
00:23:43.117 --> 00:23:44.901
Hey, Mom?

366
00:23:44.945 --> 00:23:48.557
Mom, yeah.
Yeah-- 'Kay-- Calm down, Mom.

367
00:23:48.601 --> 00:23:51.865
You know I wanna do this, okay?
You know I wanna be a comedian.

368
00:23:51.908 --> 00:23:54.171
And I wanna spend some time
with Jimmy. You know,

369
00:23:54.215 --> 00:23:56.130
- just learn from him.
<i>- Learn from him?</i>

370
00:23:56.173 --> 00:23:59.786
Mom, come on! You know-- you
know I wanna do this. Come on.

371
00:23:59.829 --> 00:24:02.092
Let me tell you something
about this man.

372
00:24:02.136 --> 00:24:04.007
<i>I know him.</i>

373
00:24:04.051 --> 00:24:06.357
<i>You don't.</i>

374
00:24:06.401 --> 00:24:09.012
<i>He only cares about himself.</i>

375
00:24:09.056 --> 00:24:11.580
<i>If you get close to him,</i>
<i>you're going to wind up hurt--</i>

376
00:24:11.624 --> 00:24:14.888
Okay, Mom?
I'm gonna call you back when you get a chance to calm down.

377
00:24:14.931 --> 00:24:17.238
But you gotta understand,
I'm gonna be a comedian.

378
00:24:17.281 --> 00:24:20.023
This is what I'm doing. There's
nothing you can do about it.

379
00:24:20.067 --> 00:24:22.417
Okay? I love you. Bye.

380
00:24:24.898 --> 00:24:26.943
Okay, well, uh...

381
00:24:26.987 --> 00:24:28.379
I think that went well.

382
00:24:29.468 --> 00:24:31.731
"And there's nothing
you can do about it!"

383
00:24:31.774 --> 00:24:34.168
That was a power move.

384
00:24:34.211 --> 00:24:36.562
Yeah, and she'll
come around, you know.

385
00:24:37.650 --> 00:24:40.304
You know, I never found out
how you two met.

386
00:24:40.348 --> 00:24:43.046
Oh, your mother.
Yeah, she, uh...

387
00:24:43.090 --> 00:24:46.136
she used to work out of
a brothel on the South Side.

388
00:24:46.180 --> 00:24:47.921
Mostly like, fetish stuff.

389
00:24:47.964 --> 00:24:50.837
She was, you know,
S&M, water sports,

390
00:24:50.880 --> 00:24:52.316
ass play.

391
00:24:52.360 --> 00:24:54.754
Yeah, discount.

392
00:24:54.797 --> 00:24:56.625
I'm fucking with you.

393
00:24:56.669 --> 00:24:59.802
She was a-- she was a waitress
at a comedy club.

394
00:24:59.846 --> 00:25:01.195
Mom was a waitress?

395
00:25:01.238 --> 00:25:02.805
- Really?
- She never told you that?

396
00:25:02.849 --> 00:25:06.026
No. I mean, she's married
to a surgeon, so...

397
00:25:06.069 --> 00:25:08.158
She was a waitress
and we'd hook up

398
00:25:08.202 --> 00:25:11.031
when I came to town
and fool around.

399
00:25:11.074 --> 00:25:14.425
And long story short, one day
she called me up and, uh,

400
00:25:14.469 --> 00:25:17.777
said she was in
the "family way," as she put it.

401
00:25:17.820 --> 00:25:22.303
And, uh,
so I just jumped the gun and married her.

402
00:25:22.346 --> 00:25:25.698
Probably mostly
for the story value, but, uh,

403
00:25:25.741 --> 00:25:27.090
it didn't work out.

404
00:25:27.134 --> 00:25:28.309
She, uh...

405
00:25:30.398 --> 00:25:31.704
gave it a shot.

406
00:25:31.747 --> 00:25:33.314
How long were you guys together?

407
00:25:33.357 --> 00:25:35.229
A while. Like...

408
00:25:35.272 --> 00:25:37.100
two, three months.

409
00:25:38.232 --> 00:25:40.800
She got tired of my shit
pretty quick and, uh,

410
00:25:40.843 --> 00:25:42.192
told me to beat feet.

411
00:25:43.716 --> 00:25:45.718
That's all right. We weren't--

412
00:25:45.761 --> 00:25:49.025
we didn't really see
eye to eye on a lot of stuff.

413
00:25:49.069 --> 00:25:53.334
And honestly, monogamy was
never really my strong suit,

414
00:25:53.377 --> 00:25:55.815
and chicks tend to frown
on that.

415
00:25:55.858 --> 00:25:57.773
Yeah.

416
00:25:57.817 --> 00:26:00.123
I'm still trying to picture
Mom as a waitress.

417
00:26:00.167 --> 00:26:02.865
I'm sorry.
The card was declined.

418
00:26:02.909 --> 00:26:04.563
Oh, it must be a mistake.

419
00:26:04.606 --> 00:26:06.129
Can you run it again?

420
00:26:06.173 --> 00:26:08.610
I already
tried it twice.

421
00:26:08.654 --> 00:26:12.092
I guess there was something
your mother could do about it.

422
00:26:13.136 --> 00:26:15.182
We'll be paying cash.

423
00:26:22.058 --> 00:26:23.799
- Boo!
- Oh!

424
00:26:23.843 --> 00:26:27.411
There he is,
the Road Dog himself.

425
00:26:27.455 --> 00:26:29.718
- How you doing, Jay?
- Hanging in there.

426
00:26:29.762 --> 00:26:31.372
Things ain't what
they used to be.

427
00:26:31.415 --> 00:26:33.635
Hey, this, uh, this is David.

428
00:26:33.679 --> 00:26:36.072
This is, uh... my boy.

429
00:26:36.116 --> 00:26:38.161
I'm his father,
if you can believe that.

430
00:26:38.205 --> 00:26:39.946
In sperm only.

431
00:26:39.989 --> 00:26:43.079
Get outta here.
Well, wonders never cease.

432
00:26:43.123 --> 00:26:45.778
- Good to meet you, kid.
- Nice to meet you, man.

433
00:26:45.821 --> 00:26:47.910
Jimmy!

434
00:26:47.954 --> 00:26:51.131
Holy shit. Mikey,
what are you doing here? - How you doing?

435
00:26:51.174 --> 00:26:54.438
Oh, my God.
Are you on the show? - I'm MCing.

436
00:26:54.482 --> 00:26:57.267
I heard you were coming to town.
I forced Jay to put me on it.

437
00:26:57.311 --> 00:26:59.182
- Fantastic.
- Yeah.

438
00:26:59.226 --> 00:27:02.621
God, it's... what, 17 years?

439
00:27:02.664 --> 00:27:05.232
- Yeah, 17 years.
- How you doing?

440
00:27:05.275 --> 00:27:09.802
You know, I'm, uh,
I'm-- I'm still here.

441
00:27:09.845 --> 00:27:12.369
- A lot of guys can't say that.
- That's true.

442
00:27:12.413 --> 00:27:15.285
Uh, this is David.
This is my son.

443
00:27:15.329 --> 00:27:17.026
David?

444
00:27:17.070 --> 00:27:19.725
No, the kid from the waitress?

445
00:27:19.768 --> 00:27:21.901
No. He's too old!

446
00:27:21.944 --> 00:27:23.685
Time flies. That's him.

447
00:27:23.729 --> 00:27:26.035
Whoa! Nice to meet you.

448
00:27:26.079 --> 00:27:28.168
- How you doing?
- Nice to meet you, man.

449
00:27:28.211 --> 00:27:30.692
Me and your dad, we go way back.

450
00:27:30.736 --> 00:27:33.434
- Let's catch up later.
- Yeah.

451
00:27:33.477 --> 00:27:36.742
Yeah. Let me, uh--
let me get your intro. What do you want me to say?

452
00:27:36.785 --> 00:27:38.265
I got your intro.

453
00:27:41.442 --> 00:27:43.879
Yeah, he's funny, huh?

454
00:27:43.923 --> 00:27:45.881
Yeah. Just wait.

455
00:27:45.925 --> 00:27:48.231
Uh, so I'm dating
this girl named Wendy.

456
00:27:48.275 --> 00:27:51.321
And I'm trying to slip her
the Whopper, and she's like,

457
00:27:52.279 --> 00:27:53.846
"Where's the beef?"

458
00:27:55.195 --> 00:27:56.544
"Where's the beef?"

459
00:27:58.589 --> 00:28:00.983
Remember? Uh, by the way,

460
00:28:01.027 --> 00:28:03.943
I'll be selling these
after the show: $15.

461
00:28:03.986 --> 00:28:05.640
Uh, only got a few left.

462
00:28:07.033 --> 00:28:08.556
You ready for your headliner?

463
00:28:08.599 --> 00:28:10.166
All right,

464
00:28:10.210 --> 00:28:11.864
let's get some energy
going here.

465
00:28:11.907 --> 00:28:13.648
This next guy
coming on the stage,

466
00:28:13.692 --> 00:28:16.390
you're all here to see him.
He's The Road Dog.

467
00:28:16.433 --> 00:28:18.348
He's been doing it
for over 30 years.

468
00:28:18.392 --> 00:28:21.395
Killing!
Please welcome my good friend,

469
00:28:21.438 --> 00:28:22.788
Jimmy Quinn!

470
00:28:28.619 --> 00:28:30.317
Keep it going for Mikey, people!

471
00:28:30.360 --> 00:28:32.319
Come on!

472
00:28:32.362 --> 00:28:33.886
Give it up!

473
00:28:33.929 --> 00:28:36.018
He should.

474
00:28:36.062 --> 00:28:38.020
I've been
busting my balls, Jimmy.

475
00:28:38.064 --> 00:28:41.894
Single-handedly keeping
"where's the beef?" jokes alive

476
00:28:41.937 --> 00:28:44.723
into the new millennium.

477
00:28:44.766 --> 00:28:47.508
Your act has fallen
and it can't get up.

478
00:28:49.728 --> 00:28:52.513
Anyway, my name is Jimmy,
and I'm an alcoholic.

479
00:28:52.556 --> 00:28:54.254
Jimmy, you're still the best.

480
00:28:54.297 --> 00:28:55.908
- Aw, thanks, Mikey.
- Yeah.

481
00:28:55.951 --> 00:28:57.953
You staying at the, uh, condo?

482
00:28:57.997 --> 00:29:01.522
- No, no. I, uh, I live here now.
- Oh.

483
00:29:01.565 --> 00:29:03.698
So-- But I'll swing by,
we can shoot the shit.

484
00:29:03.742 --> 00:29:06.396
Sounds great.
See you over there. - Okay. See you over there.

485
00:29:06.440 --> 00:29:07.833
See ya, man.

486
00:29:07.876 --> 00:29:10.618
- Good show.
- Yeah.

487
00:29:10.661 --> 00:29:13.447
Hey, Jimmy, don't forget
about the church show tomorrow.

488
00:29:13.490 --> 00:29:15.971
- What?
- Oh, come on. We talked about this.

489
00:29:16.015 --> 00:29:17.494
I got you a church gig tomorrow.

490
00:29:17.538 --> 00:29:18.974
It's an extra 250.

491
00:29:19.018 --> 00:29:20.454
You just got to keep it clean.

492
00:29:21.455 --> 00:29:24.632
I didn't agree
to any church show. - What are you talking about?

493
00:29:24.675 --> 00:29:27.156
On the phone last week,
you said you were fine with it.

494
00:29:27.200 --> 00:29:29.898
I have zero recollection
of that conversation.

495
00:29:29.942 --> 00:29:32.379
Look,
you only gotta do 20 minutes.

496
00:29:32.422 --> 00:29:34.294
You get in, you get out.

497
00:29:34.337 --> 00:29:36.905
See Pastor Bennett when you're
done. He'll pay you after.

498
00:29:36.949 --> 00:29:39.255
Keep it clean. Good show.

499
00:29:43.738 --> 00:29:46.045
You remember
Hot Springs, Arkansas?

500
00:29:46.088 --> 00:29:47.829
No, not really.

501
00:29:47.873 --> 00:29:49.962
Yeah. Yeah, you do.

502
00:29:50.005 --> 00:29:51.267
It was a convention.

503
00:29:51.311 --> 00:29:53.139
It was like Avon or Mary Kay.

504
00:29:53.182 --> 00:29:55.576
It was a bunch of
overly made-up housewives

505
00:29:55.619 --> 00:29:57.317
without their husbands.

506
00:29:57.360 --> 00:29:59.232
Shit shows, but...

507
00:29:59.275 --> 00:30:01.538
I got laid every night
that week.

508
00:30:01.582 --> 00:30:03.758
Those were the days, man.

509
00:30:03.802 --> 00:30:05.151
Those were the days.

510
00:30:08.197 --> 00:30:10.765
Remember Joey Simpson?

511
00:30:10.809 --> 00:30:12.462
Was that the dude
with the balloons?

512
00:30:12.506 --> 00:30:14.247
Right, right.
That's the guy. Dead.

513
00:30:14.290 --> 00:30:15.639
- Really?
- Cancer.

514
00:30:17.163 --> 00:30:20.340
You know who else died is,
uh, Fat Mike.

515
00:30:20.383 --> 00:30:22.646
- Oh, shit.
- Suicide.

516
00:30:22.690 --> 00:30:24.083
Yeah.

517
00:30:24.126 --> 00:30:25.258
Ricky Conner.

518
00:30:25.301 --> 00:30:27.216
Diane Alaimo.

519
00:30:27.260 --> 00:30:29.871
- Bob Thomas.
- Bob Thomas.

520
00:30:31.090 --> 00:30:32.787
- Jimmy Higgins.
- Jimmy Higgins.

521
00:30:32.831 --> 00:30:34.876
- Yeah.
- They're just gone.

522
00:30:34.920 --> 00:30:37.009
They're just all gone.

523
00:30:37.052 --> 00:30:40.099
- God.
- There's some food in the fridge that comic left.

524
00:30:40.142 --> 00:30:42.666
- Did you guys want so--
- No, no, no, no, no.

525
00:30:42.710 --> 00:30:46.279
That's the first, uh, rule of the comedy condo,

526
00:30:46.322 --> 00:30:49.673
is you don't touch anything
that comics left behind.

527
00:30:50.892 --> 00:30:52.633
They tend to get creative.

528
00:30:52.676 --> 00:30:54.896
Especially with the mayonnaise.

529
00:30:54.940 --> 00:30:57.681
I remember being
in this condo in the nineties.

530
00:30:57.725 --> 00:31:00.510
I don't think they've
changed a single thing.

531
00:31:00.554 --> 00:31:02.861
Man, if these walls
could talk, Jimmy?

532
00:31:03.992 --> 00:31:05.646
If these walls could talk,

533
00:31:05.689 --> 00:31:07.474
they'd be testifying
in court a lot.

534
00:31:10.781 --> 00:31:13.784
Your dad was the best
to do hell gigs with.

535
00:31:13.828 --> 00:31:15.786
He would rip the crowd apart.

536
00:31:15.830 --> 00:31:17.440
Fearless.

537
00:31:17.484 --> 00:31:21.096
I remember this one time
in, uh, Andover, Mass.

538
00:31:21.140 --> 00:31:22.619
Remember Andover, Mass?

539
00:31:22.663 --> 00:31:24.621
- What happened there?
- Classic.

540
00:31:24.665 --> 00:31:27.886
Your dad's on stage
tripping balls on ecstasy,

541
00:31:27.929 --> 00:31:30.584
and he's talking about it.
And this chick stands up

542
00:31:30.627 --> 00:31:36.068
and she goes, "That's not funny!
My sister died on ecstasy."

543
00:31:36.111 --> 00:31:38.940
Whole crowd goes chill.
Nobody says anything.

544
00:31:38.984 --> 00:31:41.116
And then without missing a beat,
your dad goes,

545
00:31:41.160 --> 00:31:44.337
"Oh, then she must be
as horny as I am right now.

546
00:31:44.380 --> 00:31:45.904
Let's dig her up and fuck her!"

547
00:31:45.947 --> 00:31:47.427
Jesus! You said that?

548
00:31:47.470 --> 00:31:50.299
Oh, no. That was <i>The Early Show.</i>

549
00:31:50.343 --> 00:31:53.389
<i>The Late Show,</i>
now, I'm on stage,

550
00:31:53.433 --> 00:31:55.565
and the chick's husband--
Remember this? - Yeah.

551
00:31:55.609 --> 00:31:59.439
The husband walks up on stage
and slaps me across the face.

552
00:31:59.482 --> 00:32:04.052
He hits the wrong guy.
He goes, "You don't talk about my wife's sister!"

553
00:32:04.096 --> 00:32:07.447
But you know what?
I was proud to take a punch for your dad.

554
00:32:07.490 --> 00:32:08.883
That's funny, man.

555
00:32:08.927 --> 00:32:11.842
Man, those were the days.

556
00:32:11.886 --> 00:32:14.889
Mikey, you gotta stop
living in the past.

557
00:32:14.933 --> 00:32:16.717
No, man.

558
00:32:16.760 --> 00:32:18.632
Those were the great times.

559
00:32:18.675 --> 00:32:20.155
Clubs were packed.

560
00:32:20.199 --> 00:32:22.853
I was booked 52 weeks a year.

561
00:32:22.897 --> 00:32:26.248
I was getting laid
52 weeks a year.

562
00:32:26.292 --> 00:32:29.556
I was making more money
at 21 than I am now.

563
00:32:29.599 --> 00:32:33.038
Do you know that this summer,
completely wide open.

564
00:32:33.081 --> 00:32:35.127
I had to take a job
driving a limo

565
00:32:35.170 --> 00:32:36.780
just so I don't starve to death.

566
00:32:37.868 --> 00:32:40.045
Man, I wish somebody
would build a time machine

567
00:32:40.088 --> 00:32:42.961
- and take me back to those days.
- Mm-hmm.

568
00:32:44.788 --> 00:32:46.268
Hey, what ever happened
to Laura?

569
00:32:46.312 --> 00:32:49.097
Weren't you guys
supposed to get married?

570
00:32:49.141 --> 00:32:51.970
Yeah, that didn't really
come together.

571
00:32:52.013 --> 00:32:53.928
Well, sorry to hear that.

572
00:32:55.060 --> 00:32:59.325
I really liked her.
You guys were a good couple.

573
00:32:59.368 --> 00:33:01.762
So, who else
do you still talk to?

574
00:33:01.805 --> 00:33:03.633
I don't know.
It's like you said,

575
00:33:03.677 --> 00:33:06.549
there's not a lot of guys
from the old days still around.

576
00:33:06.593 --> 00:33:09.944
What about Ross Daniels?
You hear he's-- he's booking the night show?

577
00:33:09.988 --> 00:33:12.251
Yeah, heard something
about that.

578
00:33:12.294 --> 00:33:13.730
You guys were tight.

579
00:33:13.774 --> 00:33:15.602
- Really?
- Oh, yeah.

580
00:33:15.645 --> 00:33:17.517
They were good friends.

581
00:33:17.560 --> 00:33:19.606
You know, I sent that guy
a tape a while ago.

582
00:33:19.649 --> 00:33:22.304
- Never got back to me.
- Tape?

583
00:33:22.348 --> 00:33:26.134
Maybe it's still
stuck in his VCR. -

584
00:33:27.614 --> 00:33:29.398
You know you could call him.

585
00:33:29.442 --> 00:33:31.618
Maybe you could, uh,
say something about me.

586
00:33:31.661 --> 00:33:33.924
I don't do that, Mikey.

587
00:33:33.968 --> 00:33:36.536
And, uh, besides, I don't think
it's do a lot of good.

588
00:33:36.579 --> 00:33:40.279
If you remember correctly,
the last time I saw him, I broke his nose.

589
00:33:40.322 --> 00:33:42.020
Well, how did that happen?

590
00:33:42.063 --> 00:33:44.544
Oh, my memory's
a little foggy on that.

591
00:33:44.587 --> 00:33:48.113
It might have had something to
do with me banging his fiancée.

592
00:33:48.156 --> 00:33:50.985
Yes, his fiancée. Yeah.

593
00:33:54.380 --> 00:33:58.384
Well, listen, man,
this has been great, but, uh,

594
00:33:58.427 --> 00:34:00.995
I gotta pick a guy up
at the airport in, like, an hour.

595
00:34:02.649 --> 00:34:04.694
I'll walk you to the door.

596
00:34:07.088 --> 00:34:08.829
It's great meeting you, man.

597
00:34:08.872 --> 00:34:11.049
Yeah, good meeting
you, man. Really.

598
00:34:11.092 --> 00:34:14.617
Welcome to the...
whatever world this is. -

599
00:34:18.621 --> 00:34:20.493
It's really good
to see ya again, Mike.

600
00:34:20.536 --> 00:34:22.103
Take care of yourself.

601
00:34:22.147 --> 00:34:24.627
Yeah, you too, Jimmy.

602
00:34:24.671 --> 00:34:26.412
See you soon, old pal.

603
00:34:26.455 --> 00:34:28.327
Sure, Mikey.

604
00:34:28.370 --> 00:34:30.242
- He's gone, right?
- Yeah.

605
00:34:30.285 --> 00:34:31.895
Okay.

606
00:34:31.939 --> 00:34:34.637
I feel bad for that guy.
He's just, he seems sad.

607
00:34:35.986 --> 00:34:38.772
Well, that's the business.

608
00:34:38.815 --> 00:34:40.687
What are you gonna do?

609
00:34:40.730 --> 00:34:42.863
He's not very funny, is he?

610
00:34:42.906 --> 00:34:44.038
Well...

611
00:34:44.995 --> 00:34:48.999
Mikey's a nice guy, but it's
supply and demand, you know?

612
00:34:49.043 --> 00:34:51.263
Back in the day,

613
00:34:51.306 --> 00:34:53.700
any guy who could go on stage
and do, you know,

614
00:34:53.743 --> 00:34:56.616
20 minutes of fart sounds
could make a living.

615
00:34:56.659 --> 00:34:59.532
Now, so many clubs
are closing that...

616
00:35:00.576 --> 00:35:02.839
it doesn't really matter
how nice a guy you are

617
00:35:02.883 --> 00:35:04.450
if you don't respect the art.

618
00:35:06.756 --> 00:35:10.891
Yeah. Well, we should talk about
what we're doing next weekend,

619
00:35:10.934 --> 00:35:13.763
'cause, you know,
I gotta get to New York, so...

620
00:35:13.807 --> 00:35:16.897
New York?
How are you gonna go to New York

621
00:35:16.940 --> 00:35:20.335
before you've seen the
bright lights of Indianapolis?

622
00:35:20.379 --> 00:35:24.122
You want me to take you
to Indianapolis? Is that--

623
00:35:24.165 --> 00:35:25.601
If you wanted to.

624
00:35:26.950 --> 00:35:30.302
All right, sure.
Yeah, I'll take you to Indianapolis. Sure.

625
00:35:30.345 --> 00:35:32.130
Well, you should
get some sleep, though.

626
00:35:32.173 --> 00:35:34.219
You've got that
church gig tomorrow.

627
00:35:34.262 --> 00:35:36.830
Yeah, go to bed.
I'm gonna stay up a while.

628
00:35:38.571 --> 00:35:39.659
All right.

629
00:35:41.226 --> 00:35:42.531
Good night.

630
00:35:54.064 --> 00:35:55.153
Wake up, Jimmy.

631
00:35:56.197 --> 00:35:58.068
Jimmy, you gotta wake up now.

632
00:35:58.112 --> 00:36:00.070
- What?
- You have--

633
00:36:00.114 --> 00:36:01.550
you got a show to do,
remember?

634
00:36:02.551 --> 00:36:03.944
You got that church show.

635
00:36:04.858 --> 00:36:06.990
- Fucking church.
- Yeah.

636
00:36:07.034 --> 00:36:08.731
Well, we got--
we gotta be there at 11,

637
00:36:08.775 --> 00:36:10.037
so let's get going.

638
00:36:23.746 --> 00:36:24.791
All right.

639
00:36:28.011 --> 00:36:29.230
You really need to do that?

640
00:36:30.405 --> 00:36:32.625
It's part of my process.

641
00:36:33.191 --> 00:36:34.322
Okay.

642
00:36:37.847 --> 00:36:39.022
Hey, there.
Are you, Jimmy?

643
00:36:39.327 --> 00:36:41.590
Uh, no. That's Jimmy.

644
00:36:42.461 --> 00:36:44.506
Hey, uh,
how much time you need?

645
00:36:45.028 --> 00:36:47.379
Oh, gosh. Uh, 20 minutes?

646
00:36:47.422 --> 00:36:49.946
But just remember to keep it
squeaky clean.

647
00:36:50.643 --> 00:36:51.818
I've been told.

648
00:36:57.519 --> 00:36:58.825
And finally,

649
00:36:59.304 --> 00:37:03.090
let's offer a prayer
for the Anderson family

650
00:37:03.873 --> 00:37:07.007
who perished in the Fenwick fire
earlier this week.

651
00:37:08.269 --> 00:37:09.749
Let us bow our heads.

652
00:37:24.198 --> 00:37:25.243
Okay...

653
00:37:27.810 --> 00:37:29.377
We've got a little treat for ya.

654
00:37:30.160 --> 00:37:31.727
We have a comedian.

655
00:37:32.424 --> 00:37:33.773
He's gonna entertain us all,

656
00:37:33.816 --> 00:37:35.688
so get ready to laugh.

657
00:37:35.731 --> 00:37:38.778
Please welcome, Jimmy Quinn.

658
00:37:48.222 --> 00:37:49.789
Ugh,

659
00:37:50.616 --> 00:37:51.704
God.

660
00:37:53.532 --> 00:37:55.011
Wow, this is fun.

661
00:37:56.317 --> 00:37:57.884
Ugh.

662
00:37:57.927 --> 00:38:00.626
God, I haven't been
in a church for so long.

663
00:38:01.757 --> 00:38:03.498
If I burst into flames

664
00:38:03.542 --> 00:38:06.588
uh, remember,
the fire exits are located here

665
00:38:06.632 --> 00:38:08.721
and here.

666
00:38:08.764 --> 00:38:10.157
Comedy canard.

667
00:38:10.636 --> 00:38:12.202
A little nervous 'cause, uh,

668
00:38:13.073 --> 00:38:15.597
I know what you did
to your last headlining act.

669
00:38:15.641 --> 00:38:17.817
Tough crowd, huh, J.C.?

670
00:38:18.339 --> 00:38:20.385
It's what happens to you
when you're not funny.

671
00:38:22.082 --> 00:38:24.084
Jesus died for your sins.

672
00:38:24.127 --> 00:38:26.869
I'm dying up here for 250 bucks.

673
00:38:28.697 --> 00:38:31.004
And why would you die
for someone's sins?

674
00:38:31.047 --> 00:38:32.571
It doesn't make any sense.

675
00:38:32.875 --> 00:38:35.704
When you think about it,
your sins are the only

676
00:38:35.748 --> 00:38:38.925
interesting thing
about you sorry dullards.

677
00:38:39.404 --> 00:38:41.144
You're gonna go to confession.

678
00:38:41.188 --> 00:38:44.365
You should be trying to
one up your-- your sins.

679
00:38:44.409 --> 00:38:46.106
Hey, you think that's bad,
Father?

680
00:38:46.149 --> 00:38:47.977
Wait till you hear
what I do next week.

681
00:38:49.588 --> 00:38:52.417
And speaking of sin,

682
00:38:52.765 --> 00:38:55.463
isn't it basically 90%
of every war

683
00:38:55.507 --> 00:38:59.249
that's ever been fought because
of one of your stupid religions?

684
00:38:59.859 --> 00:39:03.428
You never turn on the news
and hear, "200 killed today

685
00:39:03.471 --> 00:39:06.518
when atheist rebels
took heavy shelling

686
00:39:06.561 --> 00:39:09.782
from the agnostic
stronghold in the North."

687
00:39:09.825 --> 00:39:12.262
No, it's your dumb religions
and I'm--

688
00:39:12.741 --> 00:39:14.526
I'm not trying to bag on you.

689
00:39:14.830 --> 00:39:18.747
I mean, I envy that
you have a belief system.

690
00:39:18.791 --> 00:39:20.619
I've tried it.
It didn't work for me.

691
00:39:20.662 --> 00:39:21.968
It didn't make sense.

692
00:39:22.360 --> 00:39:24.840
How do you... justify,

693
00:39:24.884 --> 00:39:28.278
how do you explain to
an eight year old child,

694
00:39:28.322 --> 00:39:33.371
who'd just lost his mother
in a horrific fashion,

695
00:39:33.414 --> 00:39:35.808
that it's part
of some divine plan?

696
00:39:36.286 --> 00:39:39.377
How do you say,
"Oh-- Oh, no. No, Jimmy,

697
00:39:39.420 --> 00:39:41.640
Mommy's not with us anymore.

698
00:39:41.988 --> 00:39:46.471
No. See, God decided
he loved Mommy so much

699
00:39:46.514 --> 00:39:49.038
he wanted her right there
in heaven with him.

700
00:39:49.996 --> 00:39:51.606
So he sent her careening

701
00:39:51.650 --> 00:39:55.393
through a car windshield
at 65 miles an hour.

702
00:39:55.697 --> 00:39:57.220
Such an impact

703
00:39:57.264 --> 00:39:59.440
it tore most of the flesh
off her skull--"

704
00:39:59.484 --> 00:40:01.834
All right,
thank you very much, Mr. Quinn!

705
00:40:01.877 --> 00:40:04.140
- I wasn't done!
- Oh, you are now.

706
00:40:04.184 --> 00:40:06.360
How about a nice
round of applause, everyone?

707
00:40:09.232 --> 00:40:12.627
Okay, let's turn
to first Psalms.

708
00:40:20.679 --> 00:40:23.029
Mr. Quinn, can I help you?

709
00:40:23.725 --> 00:40:25.684
Yeah, I came to get my money.

710
00:40:25.727 --> 00:40:28.382
You don't think
we're really going to

711
00:40:28.426 --> 00:40:30.993
pay you for that filth?

712
00:40:31.646 --> 00:40:34.040
What are you talking about?
I was on a roll up there,

713
00:40:34.083 --> 00:40:36.216
- and you cut me off.
- When I hired a comedian,

714
00:40:36.259 --> 00:40:38.392
I was expecting
something uplifting.

715
00:40:38.436 --> 00:40:41.221
You provided
something different.

716
00:40:41.787 --> 00:40:43.919
I'm afraid you won't be
receiving any money,

717
00:40:43.963 --> 00:40:45.355
but I will pray for you.

718
00:40:46.618 --> 00:40:48.620
First of all, this is bullshit

719
00:40:48.663 --> 00:40:52.145
'cause I did not swear
one time on that goddamn stage

720
00:40:52.188 --> 00:40:54.887
and I can't buy booze
with prayers.

721
00:40:56.062 --> 00:40:58.107
Have a blessed day, Mr. Quinn.

722
00:41:01.284 --> 00:41:03.199
Bless you with
a shoe in your ass!

723
00:41:21.217 --> 00:41:23.393
So what happened?
Are you-- did you get paid?

724
00:41:24.133 --> 00:41:25.831
Well, evidently, uh,

725
00:41:25.874 --> 00:41:29.922
my brand of "clean" wasn't
squeaky enough for them.

726
00:41:30.270 --> 00:41:32.054
Well, yeah, technically,
you were clean.

727
00:41:32.098 --> 00:41:33.752
They-- they didn't pay you?

728
00:41:33.795 --> 00:41:35.928
Well, I sort of paid myself.

729
00:41:37.712 --> 00:41:39.409
Oh, come on.

730
00:41:39.453 --> 00:41:41.586
You can't steal from a church,
Jimmy. Come on.

731
00:41:41.629 --> 00:41:44.414
They tried to rip me off. I ripped them off.

732
00:41:45.067 --> 00:41:46.242
Eye for an eye.

733
00:41:46.286 --> 00:41:47.374
It's in the Bible.

734
00:41:48.418 --> 00:41:51.117
Tell this car to find us
a pawnshop somewhere.

735
00:42:16.446 --> 00:42:18.013
Sorry guys.
I'm gonna call it.

736
00:42:18.057 --> 00:42:20.233
It's 8:15. I got two people.

737
00:42:20.625 --> 00:42:22.931
Sorry, Jimmy.

738
00:42:22.975 --> 00:42:25.630
Don't sweat it.
This kind of shit happens.

739
00:42:26.021 --> 00:42:29.242
I guess all the comedy fans are over at the Will Richards Show.

740
00:42:29.764 --> 00:42:30.896
Catch you next time?

741
00:42:32.941 --> 00:42:34.464
I'm gonna head
over there myself.

742
00:42:34.508 --> 00:42:36.205
I got a buddy that
works over there.

743
00:42:36.554 --> 00:42:38.643
- Well, can we come with?
- Sure.

744
00:42:39.208 --> 00:42:40.296
Jimmy?

745
00:42:40.775 --> 00:42:42.690
How about you
drop me at the hotel?

746
00:42:42.995 --> 00:42:45.171
Come on, you don't
wanna see Will's act?

747
00:42:45.824 --> 00:42:49.741
I think I'd rather be
catheterized with a garden hose.

748
00:42:50.568 --> 00:42:52.308
Okay, well,
just come watch, like,

749
00:42:52.352 --> 00:42:54.484
and you tell me everything
that's wrong with it.

750
00:42:55.964 --> 00:42:57.096
That I can do.

751
00:43:01.753 --> 00:43:04.016
Sit-- sit down,
sit down, stop it, stop it.

752
00:43:04.059 --> 00:43:05.278
Stop it. Y'all too much.

753
00:43:05.321 --> 00:43:06.758
Thank you, Indianapolis.

754
00:43:06.801 --> 00:43:08.760
Thank you so much
for coming out for this.

755
00:43:08.803 --> 00:43:10.109
This is-- this is amazing.

756
00:43:13.765 --> 00:43:16.028
I would love to stay to
keep performing for y'all,

757
00:43:16.071 --> 00:43:17.682
but as Matilda would say,

758
00:43:17.725 --> 00:43:19.988
- "Child, I'm tired!"
- I'm tired!

759
00:43:28.301 --> 00:43:29.868
We love you, Will!

760
00:43:35.134 --> 00:43:36.657
Man, that was awesome!

761
00:43:36.918 --> 00:43:39.007
Jesus, I remember
half of those bits

762
00:43:39.051 --> 00:43:41.836
- from his open mic days.
- Yeah, well, you gotta admit, though,

763
00:43:41.880 --> 00:43:44.447
he's got great energy,
he's got really good stage presence.

764
00:43:44.491 --> 00:43:46.145
Yeah, so do televangelists.

765
00:43:46.188 --> 00:43:47.320
Guys, guys!

766
00:43:47.363 --> 00:43:48.669
I just talked to my buddy.

767
00:43:48.713 --> 00:43:50.149
We're going backstage!

768
00:43:50.192 --> 00:43:52.368
Hi, I'm Angie,
Mr. Richard's assistant.

769
00:43:52.412 --> 00:43:53.892
Which one of you is Jimmy Quinn?

770
00:43:53.935 --> 00:43:55.328
- Oh, he is.
- Follow me.

771
00:43:55.589 --> 00:43:57.199
Let's go!

772
00:44:04.337 --> 00:44:05.555
Mr. Richards?

773
00:44:05.817 --> 00:44:08.036
I have Mr. Quinn
and his party to see you.

774
00:44:11.953 --> 00:44:14.303
Oh, come on.
Bring it in. Bring it in.

775
00:44:14.347 --> 00:44:15.827
Come on.

776
00:44:15.870 --> 00:44:17.567
Come on, baby.
Come on. Get in here.

777
00:44:17.916 --> 00:44:21.136
Oh, Jimmy fucking Quinn!

778
00:44:22.007 --> 00:44:24.009
Why didn't you tell me
you were coming, man? I would've got you tickets.

779
00:44:24.052 --> 00:44:25.837
Did you see the show?
What'd you think?

780
00:44:26.272 --> 00:44:27.490
You're never funnier.

781
00:44:28.753 --> 00:44:30.189
Oh, thanks.

782
00:44:30.232 --> 00:44:31.538
Who are these guys?

783
00:44:32.408 --> 00:44:33.671
That one's, uh, David.

784
00:44:33.714 --> 00:44:35.455
That's my son.

785
00:44:35.498 --> 00:44:37.109
Oh, shit. This is David?

786
00:44:37.762 --> 00:44:40.155
Do you know I was on the road
with your father the night you were born?

787
00:44:40.199 --> 00:44:42.288
Wow. Time flies, man.
Put it there.

788
00:44:42.984 --> 00:44:44.682
Great to meet you, man.
I'm a big fan.

789
00:44:45.944 --> 00:44:47.032
My name's Spike.

790
00:44:49.861 --> 00:44:51.819
So, Jimmy, man,
what you got going on, man?

791
00:44:51.863 --> 00:44:54.256
You, uh, working a gig in town?
What's going on?

792
00:44:54.300 --> 00:44:56.302
Well, Jimmy was gonna play
the YooHoo Room

793
00:44:56.345 --> 00:44:59.131
at the bowling alley, but,
well, they-- not tonight 'cause

794
00:44:59.174 --> 00:45:01.655
they had to cancel
'cause, well, nobody came.

795
00:45:01.960 --> 00:45:03.962
Oh, man I'm sorry to hear that,
but I mean,

796
00:45:04.005 --> 00:45:07.008
but you're still on a road,
right? I love it, man.

797
00:45:07.052 --> 00:45:09.010
I guess I am, too, man.
I'm blessed.

798
00:45:09.054 --> 00:45:11.143
Not like back in the day,
when we were hopeful

799
00:45:11.186 --> 00:45:13.058
and we could make
$200 in the night, huh?

800
00:45:13.101 --> 00:45:14.668
Yeah, you still doing
those movies

801
00:45:14.712 --> 00:45:16.496
where they make
you wear a dress?

802
00:45:22.807 --> 00:45:25.679
You talk about the franchise
that grossed half a billion dollars?

803
00:45:25.984 --> 00:45:27.768
Yeah, I'm still doing those.

804
00:45:28.595 --> 00:45:30.205
Yeah.

805
00:45:30.249 --> 00:45:32.120
Just to think
you would have sold out

806
00:45:32.164 --> 00:45:33.731
for so much less.

807
00:45:33.948 --> 00:45:36.908
I cry about it
every night in my hot tub,

808
00:45:36.951 --> 00:45:38.170
with my supermodel wife.

809
00:45:38.997 --> 00:45:41.260
Yeah, I'm sure
she loves you for you.

810
00:45:42.000 --> 00:45:44.829
Still looking down
on commercial success. Let me ask you this.

811
00:45:44.872 --> 00:45:47.745
When you play the bowling alley,
do you gotta wear the bowling shoes when you're on stage?

812
00:45:47.788 --> 00:45:51.139
- That's good.
- Well, you know, I think your movies are great.

813
00:45:51.183 --> 00:45:54.273
You know, I was telling David
on the way over that you were a hack.

814
00:45:54.316 --> 00:45:58.103
But then I watched your show,
and I realized "hack" is such a lazy word

815
00:45:58.146 --> 00:46:00.409
where so many better ones
would fit.

816
00:46:00.453 --> 00:46:01.846
Like pandering

817
00:46:01.889 --> 00:46:04.196
or, uh, mundane,

818
00:46:04.239 --> 00:46:05.675
pablum,

819
00:46:06.067 --> 00:46:08.853
milquetoast, corn ball,

820
00:46:09.331 --> 00:46:11.856
uh, vapid.
That's always a fun word.

821
00:46:12.421 --> 00:46:14.684
That's quite the vocabulary
you got there, Jimmy.

822
00:46:14.728 --> 00:46:17.426
You know any other words
for alcoholic? Degenerate?

823
00:46:17.470 --> 00:46:20.603
You know,
I think I just heard them announce last call at the bar.

824
00:46:20.647 --> 00:46:22.170
I'm pretty sure they got
a stool waiting for you,

825
00:46:22.214 --> 00:46:23.911
'cause that's what
you do, right? You drink.

826
00:46:23.955 --> 00:46:26.392
You know what? I think
I'm gonna do just that.

827
00:46:26.435 --> 00:46:29.090
Uh, so, guys, I'm out of here.

828
00:46:29.569 --> 00:46:32.006
Or as Matilda would say,

829
00:46:32.050 --> 00:46:34.835
"Fuck you!"

830
00:46:34.879 --> 00:46:36.532
Enjoy your success, Will.

831
00:46:36.924 --> 00:46:38.665
I'll see you clowns out front.

832
00:46:41.233 --> 00:46:42.538
Fucking guy, man.

833
00:46:43.322 --> 00:46:45.803
I'm really sorry
about Jimmy, man. - Ah, stop, stop, stop.

834
00:46:45.846 --> 00:46:47.892
You don't have to apologize
for your father.

835
00:46:47.935 --> 00:46:49.545
I don't hate him.
I pity him.

836
00:46:50.938 --> 00:46:52.722
I love him to death,
though, man, he...

837
00:46:52.766 --> 00:46:55.421
I got my start with him.
He took me on the road with him.

838
00:46:55.464 --> 00:46:58.511
You know, back in the day,
I had the Letterman people come see him?

839
00:46:58.554 --> 00:47:01.079
- Oh, really?
- Yeah, man. They loved him.

840
00:47:01.122 --> 00:47:03.168
Booked the show.
Flew him out and everything.

841
00:47:03.211 --> 00:47:05.083
The night of the show,
he gets drunk,

842
00:47:05.126 --> 00:47:07.085
hooks up with two prostitutes,

843
00:47:07.128 --> 00:47:08.738
and he misses the whole night.

844
00:47:09.565 --> 00:47:10.828
I didn't know that.

845
00:47:12.960 --> 00:47:14.701
Pretty much blackballed him
after that,

846
00:47:16.442 --> 00:47:18.836
and what can I say, man?
The guy's afraid of success.

847
00:47:19.967 --> 00:47:21.621
Look, man, I...

848
00:47:22.448 --> 00:47:25.712
Your father's probably
one of the funniest people I've ever met in my life.

849
00:47:25.755 --> 00:47:27.018
But he has no discipline.

850
00:47:28.454 --> 00:47:31.022
If you learn anything about
this industry, just know that

851
00:47:31.587 --> 00:47:34.634
this business is more than
what you do on stage.

852
00:47:37.506 --> 00:47:38.768
Well, thanks.

853
00:47:38.812 --> 00:47:40.379
I should
probably get back to him.

854
00:47:40.422 --> 00:47:41.902
Uh, thanks for meeting us, man.

855
00:47:41.946 --> 00:47:43.904
- I really appreciate it.
- Sure.

856
00:47:43.948 --> 00:47:47.516
You know, I'm a-- I'm a comic
and I love your work, man.

857
00:47:47.995 --> 00:47:49.779
Like, can I get, like,
your email or...?

858
00:47:50.737 --> 00:47:51.825
Thanks.

859
00:48:07.841 --> 00:48:08.973
Thank you.

860
00:48:12.019 --> 00:48:14.935
I should've known "out front"
meant nearest bar, huh?

861
00:48:15.327 --> 00:48:18.417
Hey, what are ya-- what are ya
drinking? I'm buying.

862
00:48:18.460 --> 00:48:21.115
No! Why would you
embarrass me like that?

863
00:48:21.159 --> 00:48:22.900
Like, you knew I was
a big fan of him.

864
00:48:23.378 --> 00:48:25.293
Wait, you're embarrassed for me?

865
00:48:25.685 --> 00:48:27.252
Have you seen that guy's movies?

866
00:48:27.295 --> 00:48:29.123
Well, he's a big star, Jimmy.

867
00:48:29.167 --> 00:48:31.169
Did you see how many people
came to his show?

868
00:48:31.212 --> 00:48:32.822
You think that matters?

869
00:48:32.866 --> 00:48:33.911
Yeah!

870
00:48:35.173 --> 00:48:37.392
I guess I'm wasting
my time with you.

871
00:48:38.654 --> 00:48:40.439
Will told me about
the Letterman thing.

872
00:48:40.482 --> 00:48:42.310
It's funny you never mention it.

873
00:48:42.354 --> 00:48:43.877
Urban legend.

874
00:48:43.921 --> 00:48:45.618
Okay, well, he said
you got too drunk.

875
00:48:45.661 --> 00:48:47.272
You never even made it
to the taping.

876
00:48:48.142 --> 00:48:50.623
Yeah, that's probably the way
he wants to remember it.

877
00:48:51.189 --> 00:48:52.799
Well, what's your side
of the story?

878
00:48:54.932 --> 00:48:56.759
He wanted me to wear a suit.

879
00:48:58.065 --> 00:48:59.719
What? So?

880
00:48:59.762 --> 00:49:01.590
Can you picture me
in a fucking suit?

881
00:49:02.069 --> 00:49:04.506
I mean, that's how it starts.
They dress you up,

882
00:49:04.550 --> 00:49:06.247
they go through all your jokes,

883
00:49:06.291 --> 00:49:08.119
and they take all the teeth
out of them

884
00:49:08.162 --> 00:49:10.077
so they're not funny anymore.

885
00:49:10.121 --> 00:49:12.427
And they send you out there
with no guns.

886
00:49:12.471 --> 00:49:14.560
And for what? Like,

887
00:49:14.603 --> 00:49:16.431
so you can get a sitcom?

888
00:49:17.084 --> 00:49:20.044
Play the idiot dad
with the catchphrase?

889
00:49:20.653 --> 00:49:26.093
And then shilling
infomercials for some garbage.

890
00:49:26.441 --> 00:49:27.877
"Hi, do you remember me?

891
00:49:27.921 --> 00:49:31.229
I was Scooch
from <i>My Nutty Cousin,</i>

892
00:49:31.272 --> 00:49:32.926
and now I wanna talk to

893
00:49:33.318 --> 00:49:36.756
gullible old fucks
about reverse mortgages."

894
00:49:36.799 --> 00:49:38.453
Yeah, Okay. Yeah.

895
00:49:38.497 --> 00:49:40.455
So instead your working
the bowling alley.

896
00:49:41.195 --> 00:49:44.503
Yeah, I'm working in
a bowling alley with my words

897
00:49:44.938 --> 00:49:48.724
wearing my own clothes
and doing it my own way.

898
00:49:48.768 --> 00:49:50.813
Yeah, and with
my mom's credit card.

899
00:49:50.857 --> 00:49:53.642
So what are we doing?
We're going back to the hotel?

900
00:49:53.686 --> 00:49:55.079
That's...

901
00:49:55.470 --> 00:49:58.169
I gotta feeling I'm gonna be
closing this place down.

902
00:49:59.561 --> 00:50:01.302
Well, I should've known that.
Okay.

903
00:50:32.029 --> 00:50:35.032
Yo, no sign
of your sleepy time tea?

904
00:50:36.642 --> 00:50:41.908
Enjoy your backstage pass
to Captain Hot Tub?

905
00:50:44.041 --> 00:50:45.085
Hot tub.

906
00:50:46.304 --> 00:50:48.523
Real comics don't even bathe.

907
00:50:50.873 --> 00:50:53.572
You wouldn't even get
my backstage pass

908
00:50:54.051 --> 00:50:55.530
if you dropped my name.

909
00:50:56.401 --> 00:50:57.880
Because I am funny.

910
00:50:59.012 --> 00:51:00.318
People fucking know it.

911
00:51:02.407 --> 00:51:04.061
You're not even funny yet

912
00:51:04.365 --> 00:51:05.758
and you're funnier than that.

913
00:51:30.217 --> 00:51:31.784
All right, Jimmy.
Time to wake up.

914
00:51:33.220 --> 00:51:34.787
What time is it?

915
00:51:34.830 --> 00:51:36.223
It's, uh, it's 11:00.

916
00:51:37.790 --> 00:51:39.052
Am I on a bus?

917
00:51:40.358 --> 00:51:42.621
No, uh, I'm taking you to Akron

918
00:51:42.664 --> 00:51:44.710
since it's, uh, on my way.

919
00:51:44.753 --> 00:51:45.798
So...

920
00:51:47.104 --> 00:51:50.019
If that's what you want
it's okay by me.

921
00:51:51.717 --> 00:51:52.805
All right.

922
00:51:54.241 --> 00:51:55.286
Well, let's go.

923
00:52:18.004 --> 00:52:19.962
Well, I talked to my mom.

924
00:52:20.006 --> 00:52:23.401
Um, she seemed a lot better,
and both my parents agreed to

925
00:52:23.444 --> 00:52:25.098
give me a year to pursue this.

926
00:52:25.142 --> 00:52:27.405
Like, isn't that great?

927
00:52:27.448 --> 00:52:28.536
Full year, huh?

928
00:52:29.363 --> 00:52:32.192
Yeah, you ought to be
a huge star by then.

929
00:52:32.758 --> 00:52:33.846
Yeah.

930
00:52:39.504 --> 00:52:41.201
So you want to meet your aunt?

931
00:52:41.593 --> 00:52:42.942
Yeah, I have an aunt?

932
00:52:43.638 --> 00:52:45.988
I got a sister.
That means you have an aunt.

933
00:52:46.032 --> 00:52:47.599
Nancy.

934
00:52:48.034 --> 00:52:51.820
She lives in, uh, Findlay,
so it's not far off from Akron.

935
00:52:53.561 --> 00:52:54.954
Yeah. What's she like?

936
00:52:55.389 --> 00:52:57.304
She's cool.

937
00:52:57.348 --> 00:52:59.045
Lives with her partner, Julie.

938
00:53:10.230 --> 00:53:12.232
She'll probably make you
shovel her walk.

939
00:53:13.233 --> 00:53:14.278
It's nice of her.

940
00:53:17.933 --> 00:53:19.805
- Hey!
- Oh, my God. Jimmy!

941
00:53:19.848 --> 00:53:21.241
How you doing?

942
00:53:21.285 --> 00:53:22.895
Jimmy, oh,
it's so good to see you!

943
00:53:22.938 --> 00:53:24.810
It's been too long!

944
00:53:24.853 --> 00:53:27.552
Oh, let me look at you.

945
00:53:28.335 --> 00:53:29.510
You look like shit.

946
00:53:29.989 --> 00:53:31.991
Thank you very much.
I love you, too.

947
00:53:32.034 --> 00:53:33.427
- Jules.
- Jimmy.

948
00:53:34.689 --> 00:53:36.343
Oh, my goodness.

949
00:53:36.387 --> 00:53:38.040
You must be David.

950
00:53:38.084 --> 00:53:40.217
- In the flesh.
- Good to meet ya.

951
00:53:40.260 --> 00:53:42.393
Get over here!
Give me a hug!

952
00:53:42.436 --> 00:53:44.482
Oh, I haven't seen you
since you were a baby.

953
00:53:44.525 --> 00:53:47.136
Yeah, though it's great
to meet ya. Both you guys. Yeah.

954
00:53:47.180 --> 00:53:49.530
Well, come on in, it's cold!
It's freezing out here.

955
00:53:49.574 --> 00:53:51.140
Please, please,
please, this way.

956
00:53:55.144 --> 00:53:56.755
So you just
showed up at his door?

957
00:53:56.798 --> 00:53:58.322
That must have been a shock.

958
00:53:58.365 --> 00:54:00.715
Yeah, yeah, definitely.

959
00:54:00.976 --> 00:54:02.935
Well, I for one,
am just delighted.

960
00:54:02.978 --> 00:54:05.329
I was so happy
when Jimmy called last week.

961
00:54:05.372 --> 00:54:06.808
Said you two were coming.

962
00:54:09.681 --> 00:54:11.160
Oh, yeah, well,

963
00:54:11.204 --> 00:54:13.075
you're on the way to the gig,

964
00:54:13.119 --> 00:54:16.862
so how could I not stop in
and say hello?

965
00:54:16.905 --> 00:54:18.690
Family is so important.

966
00:54:19.168 --> 00:54:21.562
- Hear, hear.
- Oh, speaking of,

967
00:54:21.606 --> 00:54:24.086
you really should stop in
and see Dad before you leave.

968
00:54:24.565 --> 00:54:26.437
He's not doing too well.

969
00:54:26.480 --> 00:54:28.787
- This might be your last chance.
- Look...

970
00:54:29.570 --> 00:54:32.443
I said everything I had
to say to him the night I left.

971
00:54:33.705 --> 00:54:35.881
That was over 30 years ago.

972
00:54:35.924 --> 00:54:38.884
Well, you really owe it
to yourself and to David.

973
00:54:39.450 --> 00:54:41.190
Yeah, I would
really like to meet him.

974
00:54:41.843 --> 00:54:44.106
But I have nothing to say
to the guy.

975
00:54:44.150 --> 00:54:45.369
End of story.

976
00:54:47.588 --> 00:54:50.417
One of the things that Julie
has helped me to realize,

977
00:54:50.461 --> 00:54:52.376
you can't hold on to resentment.

978
00:54:52.419 --> 00:54:54.639
Dad did the best he could.

979
00:54:54.987 --> 00:54:56.945
Nancy, you know
that's bullshit.

980
00:54:58.338 --> 00:55:00.819
Well, you need to
try to forgive him

981
00:55:00.862 --> 00:55:03.082
for your own peace of mind.

982
00:55:03.125 --> 00:55:04.301
Fuck him.

983
00:55:06.085 --> 00:55:09.306
It wasn't easy for him
when Mom died

984
00:55:09.697 --> 00:55:11.830
raising two little kids
on his own,

985
00:55:11.873 --> 00:55:14.267
working at the factory.

986
00:55:14.311 --> 00:55:15.921
Besides,
it wasn't all his fault.

987
00:55:15.964 --> 00:55:18.010
He was basically an alcoholic.

988
00:55:18.402 --> 00:55:20.969
And you remember
what Grandpa was like. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

989
00:55:21.013 --> 00:55:22.449
Grandpa, come on.

990
00:55:22.493 --> 00:55:24.103
Are you trying
to get me to leave?

991
00:55:24.146 --> 00:55:25.670
Can we talk about
something else?

992
00:55:25.713 --> 00:55:26.888
Does he live in town?

993
00:55:27.454 --> 00:55:29.021
He's at a nursing home.

994
00:55:29.456 --> 00:55:30.936
It's 5 minutes away.

995
00:55:32.024 --> 00:55:33.765
He's had a couple of strokes.

996
00:55:34.505 --> 00:55:37.203
I'm not even sure if he knows
when we are there.

997
00:55:42.469 --> 00:55:44.036
Who wants more potato salad?

998
00:55:45.951 --> 00:55:48.780
- Another bite?
- Nah, we gotta-- we gotta roll.

999
00:55:48.823 --> 00:55:51.043
We got a two-hour drive
to Akron,

1000
00:55:51.086 --> 00:55:52.523
so I'm gonna hit the head.

1001
00:55:52.566 --> 00:55:54.655
I will take this mess
into the kitchen.

1002
00:55:59.660 --> 00:56:02.141
I'm glad we've got
a minute alone.

1003
00:56:02.184 --> 00:56:03.621
I'm worried about Jimmy.

1004
00:56:03.664 --> 00:56:05.449
He really looks terrible.

1005
00:56:05.492 --> 00:56:07.494
Is he okay?

1006
00:56:09.104 --> 00:56:12.934
Ah, no, you know,
he's-- he's drinking a lot.

1007
00:56:12.978 --> 00:56:16.024
He just... he just doesn't
take care of himself at all.

1008
00:56:18.418 --> 00:56:19.593
You're a good kid.

1009
00:56:19.637 --> 00:56:21.203
I'm glad you two reconnected.

1010
00:56:21.247 --> 00:56:23.205
Oh, yeah. So am I.
No, yeah.

1011
00:56:23.249 --> 00:56:26.644
But, um, you know, what was
it like for you guys as kids?

1012
00:56:26.687 --> 00:56:28.994
Well, it wasn't easy.

1013
00:56:29.037 --> 00:56:31.823
Um, our dad was strict.

1014
00:56:32.737 --> 00:56:35.783
He was mad at the world,
and he took it out on Jimmy.

1015
00:56:35.827 --> 00:56:38.960
They would
get into horrible fights.

1016
00:56:39.004 --> 00:56:40.353
Sorry to hear about that.

1017
00:56:41.093 --> 00:56:44.531
But you know what?
That's all in the past.

1018
00:56:46.141 --> 00:56:51.103
I just think seeing him
might give Jimmy some closure.

1019
00:56:51.146 --> 00:56:54.106
And if he doesn't,
he might regret it.

1020
00:56:54.149 --> 00:56:55.586
Oh, definitely. Yeah.

1021
00:56:55.629 --> 00:56:57.239
Um, where's this place at?

1022
00:56:57.936 --> 00:57:00.460
It's right up the street
off Route 12.

1023
00:57:00.504 --> 00:57:02.331
Um, you can't miss it.

1024
00:57:03.420 --> 00:57:06.248
So, you'll be heading
out to New York soon?

1025
00:57:06.292 --> 00:57:09.861
Yeah, that's the plan.
I'm, uh, pretty excited. So...

1026
00:57:09.904 --> 00:57:11.210
You about ready?

1027
00:57:11.253 --> 00:57:12.951
Yeah. Yeah, let's do it.

1028
00:57:15.344 --> 00:57:16.737
I love you.

1029
00:57:18.478 --> 00:57:20.915
Don't take so long
between visits, hmm?

1030
00:57:21.786 --> 00:57:23.396
Thank you.

1031
00:57:23.440 --> 00:57:24.528
For everything.

1032
00:57:29.576 --> 00:57:31.360
And you, take care of her.

1033
00:57:31.404 --> 00:57:32.666
I will.

1034
00:57:33.624 --> 00:57:36.017
David, you know
you're welcome here anytime.

1035
00:57:36.061 --> 00:57:37.192
Well, thanks, Aunt Nancy.

1036
00:57:37.976 --> 00:57:40.587
I like the sound of that.

1037
00:57:41.936 --> 00:57:42.981
Thank you, again.

1038
00:57:43.024 --> 00:57:44.199
You, too. You, too

1039
00:57:45.331 --> 00:57:47.768
You guys were a pleasure.
So thanks for having us.

1040
00:57:47.812 --> 00:57:49.988
- Aww, drive safe.
- Have a good one.

1041
00:57:51.772 --> 00:57:54.383
Well, I'm glad we stopped. I-- I really like them.

1042
00:57:55.776 --> 00:57:57.212
She's the best.

1043
00:57:57.517 --> 00:57:59.084
Yeah, and Julie, too.

1044
00:57:59.127 --> 00:58:00.564
You should visit them
more often.

1045
00:58:01.086 --> 00:58:02.391
Mm-hmm.

1046
00:58:15.448 --> 00:58:16.928
Why are we stopped?

1047
00:58:26.285 --> 00:58:28.156
What the fuck
do you think you're doing?

1048
00:58:28.766 --> 00:58:31.159
I wanna meet my grandfather.

1049
00:58:31.203 --> 00:58:32.900
What are you trying
to prove with this?

1050
00:58:33.901 --> 00:58:36.121
Nothing. I have the right to
meet my grandfather.

1051
00:58:36.164 --> 00:58:38.123
And also, it's my car.

1052
00:58:40.299 --> 00:58:42.997
Fine. Knock yourself out.

1053
00:58:43.041 --> 00:58:44.129
I'll be right here.

1054
00:58:47.132 --> 00:58:48.612
This is your dad.

1055
00:58:48.655 --> 00:58:50.222
Are you really not
coming with me?

1056
00:58:50.875 --> 00:58:53.007
I've nothing to say to the guy.

1057
00:58:55.706 --> 00:58:58.622
Okay, well. I'm going in.

1058
00:59:02.713 --> 00:59:03.757
Going.

1059
00:59:05.106 --> 00:59:06.194
Bye-bye.

1060
00:59:08.849 --> 00:59:10.285
Hey, just come with me.

1061
00:59:10.329 --> 00:59:11.809
I haven't asked you
anything else.

1062
00:59:11.852 --> 00:59:13.506
Just do this one thing
for me, okay?

1063
00:59:17.118 --> 00:59:18.424
God damn it.

1064
00:59:27.389 --> 00:59:28.565
Five minutes.

1065
00:59:30.349 --> 00:59:32.133
Okay. Good. Let's go.

1066
00:59:37.835 --> 00:59:39.793
So this is Mr. Quinn's room.

1067
00:59:43.971 --> 00:59:45.364
I'll leave you all alone.

1068
00:59:55.200 --> 00:59:56.636
Hi, I'm your--

1069
00:59:57.158 --> 00:59:58.595
I'm your grandson, David.

1070
01:00:00.118 --> 01:00:01.380
How you doing, um...

1071
01:00:02.947 --> 01:00:04.557
This is your son Jimmy.

1072
01:00:09.562 --> 01:00:11.346
I don't think he hears us.

1073
01:00:18.353 --> 01:00:21.356
I'mma go find a vending machine.

1074
01:00:45.467 --> 01:00:46.860
Look at you now.

1075
01:00:49.471 --> 01:00:51.430
Used to be such a big man.

1076
01:00:54.128 --> 01:00:56.174
You're not King Shit anymore.

1077
01:00:59.090 --> 01:01:00.439
You're a fucking vegetable.

1078
01:01:02.571 --> 01:01:03.747
Serves you right.

1079
01:01:05.009 --> 01:01:06.445
Karma's a bitch.

1080
01:01:07.707 --> 01:01:09.578
Why did you have to be
such an asshole?

1081
01:01:11.580 --> 01:01:13.365
Supposed to be my father.

1082
01:01:14.758 --> 01:01:16.237
You have any idea

1083
01:01:17.369 --> 01:01:19.066
how much I tried to

1084
01:01:19.110 --> 01:01:21.982
just get one nod
of attention out of you?

1085
01:01:23.331 --> 01:01:24.724
And all you ever did was

1086
01:01:25.769 --> 01:01:26.944
make me feel...

1087
01:01:28.162 --> 01:01:29.337
awkward.

1088
01:01:30.251 --> 01:01:31.513
Stupid.

1089
01:01:35.082 --> 01:01:36.344
I hope you don't die.

1090
01:01:36.388 --> 01:01:38.520
I hope you just sit there,

1091
01:01:38.564 --> 01:01:40.697
rot, and think about that.

1092
01:01:41.872 --> 01:01:42.960
Do you hear me?

1093
01:01:45.440 --> 01:01:46.703
Do you?

1094
01:01:56.930 --> 01:01:58.018
Dad?

1095
01:02:10.727 --> 01:02:14.034
I, uh, couldn't
find any vending machines.

1096
01:02:17.298 --> 01:02:18.386
Yeah.

1097
01:02:18.430 --> 01:02:19.736
Let's get out of here.

1098
01:02:39.320 --> 01:02:40.365
Thank you.

1099
01:02:42.889 --> 01:02:45.936
Think I, uh, need to apologize.

1100
01:02:45.979 --> 01:02:47.067
For what?

1101
01:02:48.852 --> 01:02:50.201
For not being your father.

1102
01:02:52.638 --> 01:02:54.161
I had a great father.

1103
01:02:54.205 --> 01:02:55.641
I had a great childhood.

1104
01:02:55.684 --> 01:02:57.774
There's no hard feelings,
really.

1105
01:03:15.400 --> 01:03:17.924
Okay, we got a problem.

1106
01:03:17.968 --> 01:03:19.186
Feature act isn't here.

1107
01:03:19.230 --> 01:03:20.840
I can't get him on the phone,

1108
01:03:20.884 --> 01:03:24.626
so I'm going to need you
to do an hour and a half.

1109
01:03:25.018 --> 01:03:26.933
- Kidding?
- I don't know what else to do.

1110
01:03:28.326 --> 01:03:30.589
- Can you do 20?
- Yeah, I can do 20.

1111
01:03:30.632 --> 01:03:32.373
All right. Cool.
Bring my son up.

1112
01:03:32.417 --> 01:03:33.940
He'll do a set.
I'll close it out.

1113
01:03:33.984 --> 01:03:36.160
- Are you a comedian?
- Yeah.

1114
01:03:36.203 --> 01:03:37.509
Great. What's your name?

1115
01:03:37.552 --> 01:03:38.902
Dave Moranto.

1116
01:03:39.293 --> 01:03:40.991
Okay, I'm gonna start the show.

1117
01:03:41.034 --> 01:03:42.296
All right, cool.

1118
01:03:43.428 --> 01:03:44.559
Thanks, Jimmy.

1119
01:03:44.908 --> 01:03:46.779
- Just be funny.
- Yeah.

1120
01:03:49.434 --> 01:03:52.219
Welcome to the show, everybody.
You ready to have a good time?

1121
01:03:53.742 --> 01:03:55.657
I love this group.

1122
01:03:55.701 --> 01:03:58.008
Well, listen, you know,
we only have one rule here.

1123
01:03:58.051 --> 01:04:00.401
It's real simple.
The more you drink,

1124
01:04:00.445 --> 01:04:02.316
the funnier
those comics are gonna be.

1125
01:04:02.360 --> 01:04:04.884
You got that?
So let's get it started.

1126
01:04:04.928 --> 01:04:07.495
Your first comic.
How about it, everybody?

1127
01:04:07.539 --> 01:04:10.542
A big round of applause.
David Moranto. Keep it going!

1128
01:04:17.636 --> 01:04:20.421
All right.
Give it up for, uh, that guy.

1129
01:04:20.465 --> 01:04:22.206
Okay. Yeah.

1130
01:04:24.251 --> 01:04:25.992
Good to be here, man.
Good to be here.

1131
01:04:26.036 --> 01:04:28.952
Hey, it's my girlfriend.

1132
01:04:28.995 --> 01:04:30.562
All right.
Good to be here, man.

1133
01:04:30.605 --> 01:04:32.520
I, uh, I know
I kinda look like a, uh

1134
01:04:32.564 --> 01:04:34.566
John Cusack
before he hit puberty.

1135
01:04:38.048 --> 01:04:40.746
I, uh, I just dropped out
of med school.

1136
01:04:41.138 --> 01:04:43.314
Hold your applause.

1137
01:04:43.357 --> 01:04:44.968
Let me show you guys
an impression

1138
01:04:45.011 --> 01:04:47.796
of what our group study sessions
look like.

1139
01:05:04.030 --> 01:05:05.075
Kid's funny.

1140
01:05:09.209 --> 01:05:10.384
"Dude...

1141
01:05:11.951 --> 01:05:14.736
...if humans can see water,

1142
01:05:14.780 --> 01:05:16.608
can fish see air?"

1143
01:05:18.262 --> 01:05:20.220
I'm just like,
that's a lot of pressure.

1144
01:05:23.310 --> 01:05:25.834
I'm not sure I can
follow that command.

1145
01:05:26.357 --> 01:05:27.488
You guys have been great.

1146
01:05:27.532 --> 01:05:29.055
Thanks so much. Appreciate it.

1147
01:05:29.099 --> 01:05:31.057
You gonna love your headliner,
everybody.

1148
01:05:31.449 --> 01:05:33.973
Good room.
I'm Dave Moranto. Thank you.

1149
01:05:34.017 --> 01:05:35.932
Keep it going!

1150
01:05:37.629 --> 01:05:39.196
Good job!

1151
01:05:40.066 --> 01:05:41.502
Good job!

1152
01:05:41.546 --> 01:05:43.461
How 'bout it? Dave Moranto.

1153
01:05:51.817 --> 01:05:52.949
Hey, thanks.

1154
01:05:56.909 --> 01:05:58.650
That's what I'm talking about.

1155
01:05:58.693 --> 01:06:00.652
Are we having a good time? Yes.

1156
01:06:00.695 --> 01:06:02.741
Well, are you ready
for your headliner?

1157
01:06:02.784 --> 01:06:04.395
Uh, what did you think?

1158
01:06:04.438 --> 01:06:06.353
I think so.
Let's put it together.

1159
01:06:06.397 --> 01:06:08.094
- Good crowd.
- Love this crowd.

1160
01:06:08.138 --> 01:06:09.791
He is The Road Dog.
Put it together.

1161
01:06:09.835 --> 01:06:11.532
Jimmy Quinn, everybody!

1162
01:06:17.408 --> 01:06:18.757
Thank you!

1163
01:06:18.800 --> 01:06:20.541
Louis, Ladies and gentlemen.

1164
01:06:22.195 --> 01:06:24.763
Hey, my name's Jimmy,
and I'm an alcoholic.

1165
01:06:33.467 --> 01:06:35.382
Ready to hit the road?

1166
01:06:35.426 --> 01:06:36.993
Yeah, I guess.

1167
01:06:37.036 --> 01:06:39.169
Thank you so much.
Great set. Great set.

1168
01:06:39.212 --> 01:06:41.040
I thought you might want this.

1169
01:06:41.084 --> 01:06:44.043
Uh, we record all the comics,
so here's a copy for you.

1170
01:06:44.087 --> 01:06:45.958
I finally got a hold
of the feature act.

1171
01:06:46.002 --> 01:06:47.786
He will be here tomorrow.

1172
01:06:47.829 --> 01:06:50.180
But I'm telling you,
any time you want a booking,

1173
01:06:50.223 --> 01:06:52.530
just give me a call.
We would love to have you.

1174
01:06:52.573 --> 01:06:54.227
And really, thanks again.
All right?

1175
01:06:54.271 --> 01:06:55.924
And, Jimmy, good job as usual!

1176
01:06:55.968 --> 01:06:57.187
Thanks, Lou.

1177
01:06:58.101 --> 01:06:59.537
You were so funny!

1178
01:06:59.580 --> 01:07:01.234
Yeah, you were, like,
the funniest.

1179
01:07:01.278 --> 01:07:03.671
Oh, thanks.
Appreciate it.

1180
01:07:03.715 --> 01:07:09.112
Um, we're heading over
to Shea for drinks if you wanna join us?

1181
01:07:09.155 --> 01:07:11.027
Uh, that's really nice.

1182
01:07:11.070 --> 01:07:13.029
I-- I gotta get back, though.

1183
01:07:14.421 --> 01:07:16.119
Okay.

1184
01:07:16.162 --> 01:07:17.729
Sorry.

1185
01:07:17.772 --> 01:07:18.860
Sorry.

1186
01:07:20.645 --> 01:07:21.733
"Shea?

1187
01:07:21.776 --> 01:07:23.865
I'd love to go to Shea!

1188
01:07:23.909 --> 01:07:26.216
Appletinis on me, girls."

1189
01:07:27.347 --> 01:07:28.957
Let's get the fuck out of here.

1190
01:07:30.872 --> 01:07:31.960
Yeah.

1191
01:07:44.930 --> 01:07:47.933
You know, you haven't said
a word about my set tonight.

1192
01:07:49.978 --> 01:07:52.633
What do you want me to say?

1193
01:07:52.677 --> 01:07:54.461
You know,
what'd you think of it?

1194
01:07:56.028 --> 01:07:58.683
It shouldn't matter
what anybody thinks.

1195
01:07:58.726 --> 01:08:00.293
Well, it matters
what you think.

1196
01:08:00.337 --> 01:08:01.686
I respect your opinion.

1197
01:08:06.560 --> 01:08:07.648
So?

1198
01:08:08.301 --> 01:08:09.650
So...

1199
01:08:10.303 --> 01:08:14.133
It's all style and no substance.

1200
01:08:14.177 --> 01:08:15.830
You got no voice.

1201
01:08:17.354 --> 01:08:18.877
You got no point of view.

1202
01:08:18.920 --> 01:08:22.663
There was none of you
in that set.

1203
01:08:22.707 --> 01:08:28.060
You gotta understand...
fuckin' comedy's about pain.

1204
01:08:28.104 --> 01:08:31.194
What pain have you ever felt?

1205
01:08:31.237 --> 01:08:33.805
You've had a perfect childhood,

1206
01:08:33.848 --> 01:08:37.113
perfect teeth, girls like you.

1207
01:08:37.156 --> 01:08:40.725
So you get nothing 'cause
you got nothing to work with.

1208
01:08:41.639 --> 01:08:43.728
Okay, well,
sorry I'm not Kurt Cobain,

1209
01:08:43.771 --> 01:08:46.165
but that crowd
seemed to like me. - Ugh!

1210
01:08:46.209 --> 01:08:51.344
Never underestimate
the stupidity of large groups of people.

1211
01:08:52.128 --> 01:08:53.912
So you're saying
my act is stupid?

1212
01:08:54.521 --> 01:08:56.741
No. I just let you
say it for me.

1213
01:08:57.872 --> 01:09:00.788
Just saying there's more to it
than just standing up there

1214
01:09:00.832 --> 01:09:02.312
and telling jokes.

1215
01:09:05.532 --> 01:09:07.534
There wasn't one part
that you liked?

1216
01:09:08.753 --> 01:09:11.538
What was your favorite part?

1217
01:09:16.630 --> 01:09:17.849
You're a dick!

1218
01:09:22.506 --> 01:09:24.072
You know what I think?

1219
01:09:24.116 --> 01:09:26.074
I think you're kind of jealous,
you know,

1220
01:09:26.118 --> 01:09:28.164
because you can't
stand the fact that--

1221
01:09:29.817 --> 01:09:31.384
Oh, my God, that's blood!

1222
01:09:31.428 --> 01:09:32.690
Get out of here!

1223
01:09:32.733 --> 01:09:34.648
No, that's hematemesis!

1224
01:09:34.692 --> 01:09:36.346
We need to get you
to a hospital!

1225
01:09:36.389 --> 01:09:38.609
I don't need a fucking hospital!

1226
01:09:38.652 --> 01:09:40.915
No, you're sick!
You need to see a doctor!

1227
01:09:41.742 --> 01:09:44.310
I've already seen a doctor.

1228
01:09:45.485 --> 01:09:46.965
When?

1229
01:09:47.008 --> 01:09:48.227
Get the fuck out!

1230
01:10:01.545 --> 01:10:03.851
Okay, well, I wanna know
what this doctor told you.

1231
01:10:04.939 --> 01:10:06.767
I think that would be a breach

1232
01:10:06.811 --> 01:10:09.640
of doctor/patient
confidentiality.

1233
01:10:09.683 --> 01:10:11.642
Well, goddammit, Jimmy,
he told you

1234
01:10:11.685 --> 01:10:13.731
if you don't quit drinking,
you're going to die, right?

1235
01:10:13.774 --> 01:10:15.341
We're all gonna die.

1236
01:10:16.081 --> 01:10:17.343
So you don't care?

1237
01:10:18.126 --> 01:10:19.998
That's what this
whole thing's been about?

1238
01:10:20.041 --> 01:10:22.043
Just-- just you saying goodbye?

1239
01:10:22.914 --> 01:10:25.438
I'm going out doing
what I do best.

1240
01:10:25.482 --> 01:10:28.136
And you expect me to sit here
and watch you kill yourself?

1241
01:10:28.180 --> 01:10:31.705
I was never
expecting you at all.

1242
01:10:31.749 --> 01:10:33.577
You're a big boy now.

1243
01:10:33.620 --> 01:10:36.754
You can do
whatever it is you like.

1244
01:10:36.797 --> 01:10:38.408
Yeah, I am.

1245
01:10:38.451 --> 01:10:40.714
What the fuck
do you think you're doing?

1246
01:10:40.758 --> 01:10:42.238
You gotta stop drinking!

1247
01:10:42.281 --> 01:10:45.241
Fuck are you
to tell me what to do?

1248
01:10:45.284 --> 01:10:48.069
You're--
You don't mean shit to me.

1249
01:10:48.113 --> 01:10:49.810
You'd have figured that out.

1250
01:10:49.854 --> 01:10:51.769
You're nothing but my ride.

1251
01:10:54.032 --> 01:10:56.295
All right, fuck this. I'm--

1252
01:10:56.339 --> 01:10:59.080
I'm out. I'm not dealing
with this fucking shit.

1253
01:10:59.124 --> 01:11:00.908
David!

1254
01:11:02.388 --> 01:11:03.868
David,

1255
01:11:03.911 --> 01:11:06.087
I'm sorry.

1256
01:11:06.131 --> 01:11:07.480
I shouldn't have said that.

1257
01:11:07.524 --> 01:11:09.352
Listen, just,

1258
01:11:09.395 --> 01:11:12.398
just bear with me
for a little bit longer.

1259
01:11:16.576 --> 01:11:18.970
I can't sit here and watch you
commit suicide.

1260
01:11:19.013 --> 01:11:21.973
- I'm not--
- Just one-- just get me to Columbus.

1261
01:11:22.016 --> 01:11:24.541
- Just one more gig.
- All right.

1262
01:11:24.584 --> 01:11:29.241
I'll take you to Columbus,
but then I'm going. Okay?

1263
01:11:38.032 --> 01:11:41.340
You know,
I-- I just don't get it. Like, why can't you stop?

1264
01:11:43.516 --> 01:11:45.997
I'm a lost cause, kid.

1265
01:11:46.040 --> 01:11:48.695
Don't start caring
about me too much.

1266
01:11:53.134 --> 01:11:54.222
<i>Too late.</i>

1267
01:12:10.108 --> 01:12:11.675
Is this the place?

1268
01:12:11.718 --> 01:12:13.546
Yeah,
I just gotta drop off a letter.

1269
01:12:16.070 --> 01:12:19.726
Hey, is that the girl from the pictures? What--

1270
01:12:19.770 --> 01:12:22.338
Why are you ducking?
Is there a sniper?

1271
01:12:22.381 --> 01:12:26.385
I-- I wrote her a letter
and I just wanna stick it in her mailbox.

1272
01:12:26.429 --> 01:12:29.257
- Is she gone?
- Yeah, she went inside.

1273
01:12:31.259 --> 01:12:34.045
Okay, well, I don't get it.
She's right there. Just...

1274
01:12:34.088 --> 01:12:36.526
Nah, I can't talk to her
face-to-face.

1275
01:12:36.569 --> 01:12:39.659
Come on, man.
You really can't just go and talk to her?

1276
01:12:39.703 --> 01:12:43.968
You don't-- Shut up.
You don't understand. We were engaged.

1277
01:12:44.011 --> 01:12:48.929
And I completely disappeared
on her. I just... ghosted her.

1278
01:12:48.973 --> 01:12:51.236
I wouldn't even
answer her phone calls.

1279
01:12:51.279 --> 01:12:53.194
I haven't seen her
in over 20 years.

1280
01:12:53.238 --> 01:12:56.067
Okay, well, at least you could
go talk to her, you know...

1281
01:12:56.110 --> 01:12:57.155
like a man?

1282
01:12:58.243 --> 01:12:59.897
Pretty sure I'm the last person

1283
01:12:59.940 --> 01:13:02.334
she wants to see
at her doorstep, so...

1284
01:13:02.378 --> 01:13:03.422
keep the car runnin'.

1285
01:13:36.063 --> 01:13:37.587
- Jimmy?
- Laura.

1286
01:13:37.630 --> 01:13:41.155
I wrote you a letter, and...

1287
01:13:41.199 --> 01:13:44.115
well, I was just
gonna stick it in your...

1288
01:13:45.377 --> 01:13:46.422
Uh...

1289
01:13:49.337 --> 01:13:51.514
Wait!

1290
01:13:51.557 --> 01:13:54.038
If you have something
to say to me...

1291
01:13:56.083 --> 01:13:58.216
say it to my face.

1292
01:14:00.174 --> 01:14:02.133
All right. Uh...

1293
01:14:02.176 --> 01:14:05.876
Well, it's like I said
in the letter. I--

1294
01:14:05.919 --> 01:14:08.661
You know, I was
reflecting on my life, and...

1295
01:14:08.705 --> 01:14:11.490
it wasn't you, it was me,

1296
01:14:11.534 --> 01:14:14.145
and... I was stupid.

1297
01:14:15.538 --> 01:14:21.065
That was basically
what's in the letter. That's the meat of it.

1298
01:14:22.936 --> 01:14:24.547
I wrote it so much better.

1299
01:14:26.374 --> 01:14:31.684
Laura, I was scared,
and, I mean...

1300
01:14:31.728 --> 01:14:34.034
you were real,
and it was a good thing,

1301
01:14:34.078 --> 01:14:37.168
and I w-- I wasn't used to
having good things in my life.

1302
01:14:37.211 --> 01:14:39.736
So I panicked.

1303
01:14:40.824 --> 01:14:44.480
And I've regretted it
every day of my life since.

1304
01:14:46.003 --> 01:14:48.745
You were the love of my life.
You still are.

1305
01:14:50.268 --> 01:14:51.704
It hasn't stopped.

1306
01:14:55.534 --> 01:14:57.318
So this is you
saying you're sorry?

1307
01:14:57.362 --> 01:15:01.322
Yes! Yes, incredibly sorry.

1308
01:15:01.366 --> 01:15:03.411
Nothing but sorry.

1309
01:15:05.109 --> 01:15:06.197
I believe you.

1310
01:15:07.546 --> 01:15:10.331
I forgave you, years ago.

1311
01:15:12.812 --> 01:15:14.684
But it's nice
to hear you say it.

1312
01:15:18.252 --> 01:15:19.689
You wanna come inside?

1313
01:15:19.732 --> 01:15:21.604
Yeah.

1314
01:15:30.395 --> 01:15:32.310
Can I get you anything?

1315
01:15:32.353 --> 01:15:34.530
I could really use a drink.

1316
01:15:34.573 --> 01:15:37.445
I can't help with that. I don't
have anything in the house.

1317
01:15:38.446 --> 01:15:39.970
Really?

1318
01:15:40.013 --> 01:15:41.841
All right.

1319
01:15:41.885 --> 01:15:45.541
Well, you do look fantastic.
You haven't aged a day.

1320
01:15:45.584 --> 01:15:46.629
Thank you.

1321
01:15:47.804 --> 01:15:50.502
Who is in the car?

1322
01:15:50.546 --> 01:15:52.504
Oh, that's David.

1323
01:15:52.548 --> 01:15:54.201
He's my son.

1324
01:15:55.681 --> 01:15:57.291
Uh...

1325
01:15:57.335 --> 01:16:00.207
listen, it's a long story,
but he's 21.

1326
01:16:00.251 --> 01:16:02.645
It was-- it was after us.

1327
01:16:02.688 --> 01:16:04.124
Did you marry her?

1328
01:16:05.125 --> 01:16:07.911
I-- I guess on paper.

1329
01:16:07.954 --> 01:16:10.609
But it didn't last long.
I didn't love her.

1330
01:16:13.569 --> 01:16:15.614
If that makes any sense.

1331
01:16:15.658 --> 01:16:21.054
Yeah. Um, so, you loved me, but
you ran out on our engagement.

1332
01:16:21.098 --> 01:16:23.274
Then you met a woman
who you didn't love,

1333
01:16:23.317 --> 01:16:26.190
so you married her
and had a baby with her.

1334
01:16:26.233 --> 01:16:31.195
Actually, she was pregnant
before I married her.

1335
01:16:31.238 --> 01:16:33.240
Well,
that makes everything better.

1336
01:16:33.284 --> 01:16:34.894
Please invite him in.

1337
01:16:42.685 --> 01:16:46.166
So, basically, I went with
the best and the safest option,

1338
01:16:46.210 --> 01:16:50.344
which was to drop out of
med school, and here we are.

1339
01:16:50.388 --> 01:16:53.826
Well, there's no one better
to learn comedy from than Jimmy.

1340
01:16:55.436 --> 01:16:59.702
- So what are your plans now?
- I got a show next Friday

1341
01:16:59.745 --> 01:17:02.661
at Magooby's Comedy Club
in town.

1342
01:17:02.705 --> 01:17:05.925
And, uh, I'm just gonna
get a motel till then.

1343
01:17:05.969 --> 01:17:08.014
And I'm heading
to New York soon.

1344
01:17:08.058 --> 01:17:10.060
- That's exciting.
- Yeah.

1345
01:17:10.103 --> 01:17:12.410
But, you know,
you should go see Jimmy's show.

1346
01:17:12.453 --> 01:17:14.934
It's been a long time
since I've seen his act.

1347
01:17:14.978 --> 01:17:16.457
Maybe I will.

1348
01:17:16.501 --> 01:17:18.721
We met at a comedy club.
Did you know that?

1349
01:17:18.764 --> 01:17:21.811
- No. No, really?
- Yeah.

1350
01:17:21.854 --> 01:17:26.859
I went up to him after his show
and told him how funny he was, and he asked me out.

1351
01:17:26.903 --> 01:17:29.383
I'm sure I'm the only girl
that's ever happened to.

1352
01:17:30.820 --> 01:17:34.301
You're the only one
that mattered.

1353
01:17:34.345 --> 01:17:37.696
Well, listen, David,
if you're sticking around...

1354
01:17:37.740 --> 01:17:39.959
You know, why don't
you guys just stay here?

1355
01:17:40.003 --> 01:17:42.701
I-- It's better than
wasting money on a motel,

1356
01:17:42.745 --> 01:17:45.530
and I've got plenty of room.

1357
01:17:45.573 --> 01:17:48.794
Yeah, that's--
that's fine with me. Thanks.

1358
01:17:50.361 --> 01:17:53.756
- Yeah.
- That's, uh-- that's really nice.

1359
01:17:53.799 --> 01:17:56.976
I'm gonna grab something
out of my car. I'll-- I'll be right back.

1360
01:18:01.807 --> 01:18:04.201
You really care about him,
don't you? - Yeah, I--

1361
01:18:04.244 --> 01:18:06.072
I haven't known him
that long, but...

1362
01:18:06.116 --> 01:18:07.508
yeah, I do a lot. Yeah.

1363
01:18:07.552 --> 01:18:09.815
How bad is it?

1364
01:18:09.859 --> 01:18:11.730
He doesn't look well.

1365
01:18:11.774 --> 01:18:17.388
I mean-- I mean,
he's dying, so... - Cirrhosis?

1366
01:18:17.431 --> 01:18:21.522
I mean, he-- he saw a doctor,
you know? That doctor, you know, must've told him that

1367
01:18:21.566 --> 01:18:23.873
if he doesn't quit drinking,
he's gonna die.

1368
01:18:23.916 --> 01:18:28.181
But he doesn't give a shit.
It's like he doesn't even care.

1369
01:18:28.225 --> 01:18:31.358
It's not that simple.
He's an addict.

1370
01:18:31.402 --> 01:18:33.534
Until he decides he wants
to do it for himself,

1371
01:18:33.578 --> 01:18:36.450
there's nothing you
or anyone else can do for him.

1372
01:18:40.411 --> 01:18:42.326
You, uh, get what you needed?

1373
01:18:42.369 --> 01:18:45.111
Yeah. Thanks.

1374
01:18:46.112 --> 01:18:49.550
So, why don't you guys
get cleaned up, and I'll make us some dinner?

1375
01:18:49.594 --> 01:18:51.248
- Great.
- Okay.

1376
01:18:52.684 --> 01:18:54.947
Well,
you guys must be having fun.

1377
01:18:54.991 --> 01:18:58.777
I used to love going on the road
with Jimmy, seeing America.

1378
01:18:58.821 --> 01:19:02.563
Oh, I-- I love it.
I mean, this is what I wanna do with my life, so.

1379
01:19:02.607 --> 01:19:05.175
I-- I'd love to see
your act some time.

1380
01:19:05.218 --> 01:19:10.006
As a matter of fact,
I actually just uploaded a set I did at Dad's show in Akron.

1381
01:19:10.049 --> 01:19:13.052
Um... you, uh--
you wanna see it?

1382
01:19:13.096 --> 01:19:16.752
- Yeah, that'd be great.
- Cool. Um, yeah, I'll go get my computer.

1383
01:19:21.800 --> 01:19:24.585
He is a good kid. I like him.

1384
01:19:25.630 --> 01:19:27.153
Yeah, he is.

1385
01:19:28.981 --> 01:19:32.332
You're real quiet.
What's going on?

1386
01:19:34.857 --> 01:19:37.598
It's just,
I don't know, overwhelming?

1387
01:19:37.642 --> 01:19:41.602
Just, you know,
being here with you. Again.

1388
01:19:43.387 --> 01:19:44.562
I get it.

1389
01:19:46.782 --> 01:19:49.610
I had a bad couple of years
after you left.

1390
01:19:49.654 --> 01:19:51.569
I got married too.

1391
01:19:51.612 --> 01:19:53.353
He was a good guy.

1392
01:19:54.746 --> 01:19:58.794
But I was dealing with
a lot of grief back then, and I got angry.

1393
01:20:00.143 --> 01:20:03.059
Angry at him
for being so decent.

1394
01:20:05.409 --> 01:20:07.672
Angry...

1395
01:20:07.715 --> 01:20:11.241
at him caring so much
when I couldn't.

1396
01:20:11.284 --> 01:20:14.592
That made me hate myself.

1397
01:20:14.635 --> 01:20:17.334
Pretty much climbed inside
a bottle of Merlot, and...

1398
01:20:18.944 --> 01:20:24.210
then I watched him struggle
and beg and try to fix me.

1399
01:20:24.254 --> 01:20:26.430
And eventually
I watched him leave.

1400
01:20:28.475 --> 01:20:29.825
I was by myself.

1401
01:20:30.869 --> 01:20:31.914
Alone.

1402
01:20:33.132 --> 01:20:34.742
That's when I hit my bottom.

1403
01:20:34.786 --> 01:20:37.963
Then I realized
I had two choices:

1404
01:20:39.573 --> 01:20:41.314
die inside that bottle,

1405
01:20:42.489 --> 01:20:44.317
or fight for my life.

1406
01:20:44.361 --> 01:20:46.537
I've been sober 15 years.

1407
01:20:47.494 --> 01:20:52.543
That's-- that's good.

1408
01:20:52.586 --> 01:20:55.676
I'm going to a meeting tomorrow.
Wanna come with me?

1409
01:20:55.720 --> 01:20:57.809
Uh...

1410
01:20:57.853 --> 01:21:02.205
I-- I don't think so. That's--
It's kind of off-brand for me.

1411
01:21:04.250 --> 01:21:07.863
It's just that
I think David and...

1412
01:21:07.906 --> 01:21:10.866
some other people might like
to have you around for a while.

1413
01:21:11.997 --> 01:21:13.129
Um...

1414
01:21:14.782 --> 01:21:17.350
uh, I'm gonna hit the bathroom.

1415
01:21:31.364 --> 01:21:33.889
Hey. Don't blow this.
She's really great.

1416
01:21:34.890 --> 01:21:35.934
Yeah...

1417
01:21:43.637 --> 01:21:44.725
All right.

1418
01:21:46.727 --> 01:21:50.906
So, uh, it's on its own browser.

1419
01:21:50.949 --> 01:21:53.343
- It's queued up?
- Yep. There it is. Okay.

1420
01:21:53.386 --> 01:21:55.954
<i>...I know</i>
<i>I kinda look like a, uh,</i>

1421
01:21:55.998 --> 01:21:58.261
<i>John Cusack</i>
<i>before he hit puberty...</i>

1422
01:21:58.304 --> 01:22:02.352
That's good.
It's a good opener. - Appreciate it.

1423
01:22:02.395 --> 01:22:04.745
<i>...I, uh-- I just</i>
<i>dropped out of med school.</i>

1424
01:22:04.789 --> 01:22:06.573
Kind of a stupid joke.

1425
01:22:06.617 --> 01:22:08.401
I like stupid.

1426
01:22:11.491 --> 01:22:12.753
<i>Oh, good morning!</i>

1427
01:22:12.797 --> 01:22:14.233
- Morning!
- How'd you sleep?

1428
01:22:14.277 --> 01:22:16.540
Great, yeah.
Thanks for letting us stay here.

1429
01:22:16.583 --> 01:22:19.978
My pleasure.
Is, uh, Jimmy awake?

1430
01:22:20.022 --> 01:22:22.198
Uh, yeah, I think
I heard him moving around.

1431
01:22:24.069 --> 01:22:26.550
- I hope you like waffles.
- Oh, yeah.

1432
01:22:26.593 --> 01:22:30.119
- So, New York is next?
- Yeah, yeah. I'm pretty excited.

1433
01:22:30.162 --> 01:22:33.296
Uh, got some friends out there,
so, you know, should be good.

1434
01:22:34.514 --> 01:22:37.387
I like New York. It's just
a little "big city" for me.

1435
01:22:37.430 --> 01:22:39.824
- Yeah.
- These days, I like things quieter.

1436
01:22:39.867 --> 01:22:41.695
Good morning, sleepyhead!

1437
01:22:41.739 --> 01:22:43.741
- Yeah...
- Can I make you some waffles?

1438
01:22:43.784 --> 01:22:46.570
Ugh. God, no. Uh...

1439
01:22:47.571 --> 01:22:49.312
just coffee if you got it.

1440
01:22:49.355 --> 01:22:52.358
- You still take it black?
- Good memory.

1441
01:22:53.403 --> 01:22:57.973
So, I took the day off work.
What would you guys like to do?

1442
01:22:58.974 --> 01:23:00.584
Why don't we hang out here?

1443
01:23:10.724 --> 01:23:11.812
"Mices"?

1444
01:23:13.727 --> 01:23:15.599
Yeah, like a lot of mice.

1445
01:23:16.992 --> 01:23:20.473
You know you can't add an "S"
to a word that's already plural.

1446
01:23:22.040 --> 01:23:24.564
All right, if you're
gonna be all technical,

1447
01:23:24.608 --> 01:23:28.133
then I ain't got shit.

1448
01:23:28.177 --> 01:23:32.355
Listen, why don't you guys
just play together? I'm gonna go lay down for a bit.

1449
01:23:41.103 --> 01:23:43.366
Okay! What do you got?

1450
01:23:48.588 --> 01:23:49.676
"Queeve"?

1451
01:23:52.114 --> 01:23:54.029
That's... not a word.

1452
01:23:54.072 --> 01:23:56.814
Oh, sure it is.
That's-- that's a medical term.

1453
01:23:56.857 --> 01:23:59.121
You are such a bullshitter!

1454
01:23:59.164 --> 01:24:02.211
All right, where's my phone?
I'm gonna look this up. Uh...

1455
01:24:05.083 --> 01:24:08.608
- That works!
- No, no, no. Um...

1456
01:24:08.652 --> 01:24:10.958
Where's my phone?
I'm gonna Google this.

1457
01:24:11.002 --> 01:24:13.135
Just admit it, you got nothing!

1458
01:24:13.178 --> 01:24:16.312
- Ow, my "queeve"!
- God.

1459
01:24:16.355 --> 01:24:17.704
Jimmy!

1460
01:24:19.532 --> 01:24:20.664
Jimmy?

1461
01:24:22.318 --> 01:24:23.362
Jimmy?

1462
01:24:27.758 --> 01:24:29.064
What are you doing?

1463
01:24:37.289 --> 01:24:38.595
I wanna stop.

1464
01:24:39.596 --> 01:24:41.076
I do. I just...

1465
01:24:42.686 --> 01:24:45.080
I wanna stop.
I just gotta figure out how.

1466
01:24:45.123 --> 01:24:48.909
Good!
We'll help you. Right, Laura?

1467
01:24:48.953 --> 01:24:50.650
I'll stay as long
as it takes, Dad.

1468
01:24:54.306 --> 01:24:55.351
You can do this.

1469
01:25:37.132 --> 01:25:41.353
Okay. Okay.
Doing good. All right.

1470
01:25:41.397 --> 01:25:44.051
- Okay, I'll take care of this.
- Yes, thank you.

1471
01:25:44.095 --> 01:25:46.967
Um, David,
why don't you get some rest?

1472
01:25:47.011 --> 01:25:51.058
We can do this in shifts
until he's out of danger.

1473
01:25:51.102 --> 01:25:54.236
Okay, but call me if
you need anything, all right? - Yep, I will.

1474
01:25:58.109 --> 01:26:01.112
All right.
It's okay. It's okay.

1475
01:26:01.156 --> 01:26:03.941
You...

1476
01:26:10.730 --> 01:26:12.079
Okay.

1477
01:26:16.867 --> 01:26:20.044
That's a good sign.
You got your appetite back.

1478
01:26:20.087 --> 01:26:22.002
Yeah, how-- how ya feeling?

1479
01:26:23.003 --> 01:26:24.875
Like shit.

1480
01:26:24.918 --> 01:26:28.531
So, that's an improvement.

1481
01:26:28.574 --> 01:26:34.101
Listen, I'm not good with
"thank yous," so I'm gonna skip all that, but, uh...

1482
01:26:34.145 --> 01:26:37.235
I know this couldn't
have been easy on you guys.

1483
01:26:37.279 --> 01:26:38.845
- It wasn't.
- It was terrible.

1484
01:26:38.889 --> 01:26:40.456
- The worst.
- Awful.

1485
01:26:40.499 --> 01:26:43.459
Thanks.
Starting to get some optimism,

1486
01:26:43.502 --> 01:26:44.982
and you're busting my balls.

1487
01:26:46.592 --> 01:26:48.638
You've got a long road
ahead of you.

1488
01:26:48.681 --> 01:26:50.901
But at least you're
out of physical danger.

1489
01:27:01.738 --> 01:27:04.219
And I'd like to thank
my family and my sponsor

1490
01:27:04.262 --> 01:27:07.134
for getting me to the point
that I'm at today. Thank you.

1491
01:27:09.311 --> 01:27:11.878
Thank you, Alexa.
You did a great job.

1492
01:27:11.922 --> 01:27:14.577
Would anybody else like to
come up and share this evening?

1493
01:27:15.839 --> 01:27:17.406
Yeah. Come on up, come on up.

1494
01:27:21.627 --> 01:27:25.631
Hey, keep it going for Greg,
ladies and gentlemen. -

1495
01:27:25.675 --> 01:27:29.287
Sorry, force of habit. Uh...

1496
01:27:29.331 --> 01:27:32.247
uh, my name's Jimmy,
and I'm an alcoholic.

1497
01:27:32.290 --> 01:27:36.338
- Hi, Jimmy.
- Yeah, it's strange that, uh,

1498
01:27:36.381 --> 01:27:41.125
I've used that as
an opening line on stage in comedy for a million years.

1499
01:27:42.039 --> 01:27:44.563
Honestly, it kind of
stings to say it for real

1500
01:27:44.607 --> 01:27:48.175
and not get the laugh.
But, um... -

1501
01:27:48.219 --> 01:27:51.135
I started drinking
as a teenager.

1502
01:27:51.178 --> 01:27:54.007
I grew up thinking
I was worthless, and...

1503
01:27:55.008 --> 01:27:58.360
when I found alcohol, I don't
think it changed it that much,

1504
01:27:58.403 --> 01:28:02.799
but it just made me not care
that I was a piece of shit.

1505
01:28:02.842 --> 01:28:05.149
You know,
it deadens your emotions.

1506
01:28:05.192 --> 01:28:08.674
Uh, which I thought
was a good thing.

1507
01:28:08.718 --> 01:28:14.289
Like that line from <i>Pet Sematary</i>
where the guy says, "Yeah, sometimes dead is better."

1508
01:28:14.332 --> 01:28:17.030
I believed that.

1509
01:28:17.074 --> 01:28:19.119
And I would lie to myself.

1510
01:28:19.163 --> 01:28:23.210
Uh, denial,
as I guess you guys could say.

1511
01:28:23.254 --> 01:28:27.998
I mean, I remember I would be--
You know, booze shakes so bad in the morning

1512
01:28:28.041 --> 01:28:32.829
that I would be white-knuckling
a breakfast sandwich and having to move my mouth to it

1513
01:28:32.872 --> 01:28:38.225
and still thinking, "I don't
have an alcohol problem. It's probably just a little bit

1514
01:28:38.269 --> 01:28:42.621
of Parkinson's disease going
on there. I'm fine." But, uh... -

1515
01:28:42.665 --> 01:28:47.887
I know this is gonna be
a lot of hard work, and I hope to be where you are someday.

1516
01:28:47.931 --> 01:28:49.541
Uh...

1517
01:28:49.585 --> 01:28:51.630
I just hate-- hate
saying "quitting."

1518
01:28:51.674 --> 01:28:55.112
I always thought of "quitting"
as a word of weakness, and...

1519
01:28:56.374 --> 01:28:58.985
I know now that
I'm not a weak person,

1520
01:28:59.029 --> 01:29:02.380
so instead of saying "I quit"
from now on-- for--

1521
01:29:02.424 --> 01:29:06.123
from now on, I'm just gonna say
"I retired undefeated."

1522
01:29:06.166 --> 01:29:09.387
So. Thank you,
and tip your waitresses.

1523
01:29:17.874 --> 01:29:23.227
You have no idea how it felt
to be that clearheaded on stage tonight.

1524
01:29:23.270 --> 01:29:27.971
I like that
sharing at an AA meeting is "on stage" for you.

1525
01:29:28.014 --> 01:29:31.061
- Well... I got some chuckles.
- Yeah, you did.

1526
01:29:32.932 --> 01:29:36.545
So, uh, how would you feel
if I told you that

1527
01:29:36.588 --> 01:29:42.725
now you're pretty much
my sole and only solitary reason for living?

1528
01:29:42.768 --> 01:29:45.641
Does that put too-- too much pressure on you?

1529
01:29:45.684 --> 01:29:48.165
Does that put you
in an awkward position?

1530
01:29:53.866 --> 01:29:56.216
Well... I'm, uh, going to bed.

1531
01:29:57.957 --> 01:30:00.743
- You say something?
- Nope.

1532
01:30:00.786 --> 01:30:01.961
Good night.

1533
01:30:05.661 --> 01:30:10.230
Yeah, you know,
I think maybe you should sleep in my room tonight.

1534
01:30:10.274 --> 01:30:12.102
For safety.

1535
01:30:13.451 --> 01:30:16.149
Yeah, all right.
If it's a safety issue.

1536
01:30:28.901 --> 01:30:32.296
Listen, I know that
couldn't have been easy on you.

1537
01:30:32.339 --> 01:30:34.472
It wasn't.

1538
01:30:37.519 --> 01:30:40.435
You don't by any chance
still have that ring I got you?

1539
01:30:45.440 --> 01:30:47.267
Do you mean...

1540
01:30:50.227 --> 01:30:51.663
this?

1541
01:30:52.795 --> 01:30:54.710
I think we should pawn it.

1542
01:30:54.753 --> 01:30:56.189
I thought about it.

1543
01:30:58.148 --> 01:31:02.761
Why don't we just consider this
the world's longest engagement?

1544
01:31:05.111 --> 01:31:06.809
It still fits.

1545
01:31:06.852 --> 01:31:08.941
It's a good sign.

1546
01:31:08.985 --> 01:31:10.465
We could do it right this time.

1547
01:31:11.988 --> 01:31:13.772
I'm a different person now.

1548
01:31:15.339 --> 01:31:18.168
- Than you were eight days ago?
- Oh, come on.

1549
01:31:20.953 --> 01:31:23.042
I know how this can go.

1550
01:31:23.086 --> 01:31:24.783
I'm not gonna get hurt again.

1551
01:31:24.827 --> 01:31:26.393
You won't.

1552
01:31:26.437 --> 01:31:27.656
I'm serious.

1553
01:31:29.179 --> 01:31:31.224
I don't wanna
be that person anymore.

1554
01:31:33.313 --> 01:31:35.577
Let's take it one day at a time.

1555
01:31:35.620 --> 01:31:37.666
I'm just so happy
you're here now.

1556
01:31:54.596 --> 01:31:56.119
- Jimmy!
- Mark.

1557
01:31:56.162 --> 01:31:57.686
It's been a long time!

1558
01:31:57.729 --> 01:31:59.775
- How are you, sir?
- Good. How you doing?

1559
01:31:59.818 --> 01:32:02.647
- Good.
- You're a little early, pal. We're not even open yet.

1560
01:32:02.691 --> 01:32:05.171
Trying to beat the paparazzi.

1561
01:32:05.215 --> 01:32:07.217
This is my son, David,
and, uh... - Hey, how you doing?

1562
01:32:07.260 --> 01:32:09.219
- Nice to meet you, man.
- ...my girlfriend, Laura.

1563
01:32:09.262 --> 01:32:12.918
Nice to meet ya.
So, uh, what are we drinking?

1564
01:32:12.962 --> 01:32:15.268
You know, just a--
just a bottle of water.

1565
01:32:15.312 --> 01:32:18.794
- "Water," yeah.
- Yeah. Yeah, just-- just water.

1566
01:32:18.837 --> 01:32:21.840
Who are you and what have you
done with the real Jimmy Quinn?

1567
01:32:23.450 --> 01:32:24.756
Just water.

1568
01:32:24.800 --> 01:32:25.844
Okay!

1569
01:32:26.802 --> 01:32:28.804
All right. A table?

1570
01:32:36.768 --> 01:32:38.640
Well, how you feeling?

1571
01:32:38.683 --> 01:32:40.772
Better once I'm on that stage.

1572
01:32:40.816 --> 01:32:42.687
Well, I'm excited to see you.

1573
01:32:42.731 --> 01:32:44.950
- It's really been too long.
- Yeah.

1574
01:32:45.951 --> 01:32:49.607
Hey, I-- I don't wanna beat
a dead horse with this, but...

1575
01:32:49.651 --> 01:32:55.613
thank you both again,
'cause I couldn't have done this without your support, and...

1576
01:32:55.657 --> 01:32:57.963
I was a dead man in my own eyes
a week ago,

1577
01:32:58.007 --> 01:33:01.053
and... here we are, so.

1578
01:33:01.097 --> 01:33:03.665
And you! I just wanted to say...

1579
01:33:05.101 --> 01:33:07.407
you're everything
I could've wanted in a son,

1580
01:33:07.451 --> 01:33:11.760
and I'm really sorry I wasn't
there to watch you grow up.

1581
01:33:11.803 --> 01:33:14.110
But I was really
hoping for a girl.

1582
01:33:17.287 --> 01:33:18.375
Okay.

1583
01:33:19.768 --> 01:33:22.292
Okay, you guys ready
for your headliner? -

1584
01:33:22.335 --> 01:33:25.469
Come on! You could do
better than that! You guys ready for your headliner?

1585
01:33:25.512 --> 01:33:29.473
There you go! You guys are in for a real treat.

1586
01:33:29.516 --> 01:33:32.215
This guy has been entertaining
audiences for over 30 years.

1587
01:33:32.258 --> 01:33:35.914
I'm talking about the legendary
Road Dog himself, Jimmy Quinn!

1588
01:33:42.921 --> 01:33:45.315
Vince! Keep it going for Vince!

1589
01:33:50.494 --> 01:33:53.715
Weird gynecological instrument.

1590
01:33:53.758 --> 01:33:57.370
Yeah. Hey, my name's Jimmy, and I'm an alcoholic.

1591
01:33:59.764 --> 01:34:04.639
Actually, I-- I quit
drinking a week ago. Uh...

1592
01:34:06.075 --> 01:34:10.427
So, uh--
But I'm still an alcoholic, so the jokes should still work.

1593
01:34:10.470 --> 01:34:14.170
Uh... yeah, I used to say that,
uh...

1594
01:34:15.737 --> 01:34:18.914
yeah, I lost more friends
to AA than, uh--

1595
01:34:18.957 --> 01:34:22.918
than St. Jude's did
to dead kids with cancer.

1596
01:34:25.137 --> 01:34:29.359
You know,
you see that chip on their ring, and it's like, uh--

1597
01:34:29.402 --> 01:34:34.843
it's like seeing a toe tag
on their dead corpse. -

1598
01:34:34.886 --> 01:34:38.934
My doctor told me that
I had to quit-- quit drinking 'cause, uh...

1599
01:34:38.977 --> 01:34:41.110
And I told him, you know, uh--

1600
01:34:41.153 --> 01:34:47.594
You know, uh, I prefer to
think of it as, uh, I retired--

1601
01:34:48.726 --> 01:34:52.643
Ah, I-- I fucked up the--
fucked the punchline up.

1602
01:34:52.687 --> 01:34:55.994
Maybe that's what I should quit.
Fucking up punchlines.

1603
01:34:56.038 --> 01:34:58.518
Can I get a sponsor for that?

1604
01:34:58.562 --> 01:35:02.784
It's supposed to be,
"I've-- I didn't quit drinking, I retired undefeated."

1605
01:35:02.827 --> 01:35:06.701
Which... probably be funnier
if I didn't fuck it up.

1606
01:35:06.744 --> 01:35:07.789
Uh...

1607
01:35:11.270 --> 01:35:14.360
I had, uh, two ladies walk out
of my show last night 'cause--

1608
01:35:14.404 --> 01:35:19.322
uh, complaining that I was
drunk on stage-- uh, before.

1609
01:35:19.365 --> 01:35:23.718
Like, before I quit drinking.
They walked out of the show, and they were complaining

1610
01:35:23.761 --> 01:35:26.111
that I was-- you know,
'cause I was drunk.

1611
01:35:26.155 --> 01:35:30.463
And I'm like, I'm not--
I'm not driving a bus, you know?

1612
01:35:30.507 --> 01:35:32.552
I'm a comedian.

1613
01:35:32.596 --> 01:35:37.906
Bus...

1614
01:35:37.949 --> 01:35:40.430
You guys want some easy comedy?

1615
01:35:40.473 --> 01:35:42.345
What's the problem?

1616
01:35:42.388 --> 01:35:43.955
Uh...

1617
01:35:45.261 --> 01:35:48.481
Yeah,
here's a-- here's an impression of me when I start in comedy.

1618
01:35:56.533 --> 01:35:59.362
It's supposed to
sound like a bong. But you--

1619
01:36:03.018 --> 01:36:06.543
Bring back the last guy! - Yeah!

1620
01:36:06.586 --> 01:36:09.589
You know what? That's-- Fine.

1621
01:36:09.633 --> 01:36:11.766
You know, it's not a bad idea.

1622
01:36:11.809 --> 01:36:16.988
Vince, why don't you, uh,
control this sinking ship?

1623
01:36:17.032 --> 01:36:20.209
I'm sorry.
This was a fucking mistake.

1624
01:36:26.868 --> 01:36:28.957
Okay!
Well, that was legendary.

1625
01:36:35.267 --> 01:36:37.313
Hey, a-- a whiskey.

1626
01:36:37.356 --> 01:36:40.664
- What the fuck was that?
- I'm gonna fix it in the second show.

1627
01:36:40.707 --> 01:36:42.666
Mark, I-- I swear to you.

1628
01:36:44.407 --> 01:36:46.191
You better.

1629
01:37:13.436 --> 01:37:16.352
- What the hell are you doing?
- What does it look like?

1630
01:37:18.397 --> 01:37:21.357
You had one bad show! Just--
You gotta give it some time!

1631
01:37:22.314 --> 01:37:24.229
Did you see that?

1632
01:37:24.273 --> 01:37:26.275
It was a fucking embarrassment.

1633
01:37:26.318 --> 01:37:29.844
That wasn't me up there.
This is what I do, David.

1634
01:37:29.887 --> 01:37:31.976
This is who I am, and...

1635
01:37:32.020 --> 01:37:33.499
if I can't have that,

1636
01:37:33.543 --> 01:37:35.980
the rest of it
doesn't mean shit.

1637
01:37:36.024 --> 01:37:38.853
I'm never gonna feel
that way on stage again.

1638
01:37:41.159 --> 01:37:42.639
Mom was right about you.

1639
01:37:42.682 --> 01:37:44.902
You hurt everyone
who cares about you,

1640
01:37:44.946 --> 01:37:46.861
'cause you don't know
what it's like to care.

1641
01:37:48.297 --> 01:37:50.865
I'm taking Laura home,
and I'm leaving tonight.

1642
01:37:50.908 --> 01:37:52.867
And you're never
seeing me again.

1643
01:37:52.910 --> 01:37:54.216
Bye!

1644
01:37:58.002 --> 01:37:59.438
Thanks for the lessons.

1645
01:38:37.781 --> 01:38:40.175
Is that your phone?

1646
01:38:41.437 --> 01:38:43.439
Hold on. Let me take this.

1647
01:38:46.355 --> 01:38:47.878
Ross Daniels.

1648
01:38:47.922 --> 01:38:51.621
Ross! It's your old pal Jimmy.

1649
01:38:55.407 --> 01:38:57.888
You got a lot of
fuckin' nerve calling me.

1650
01:38:58.933 --> 01:39:03.111
Hey, before you get started,
listen, I've-- I fucked up.

1651
01:39:04.112 --> 01:39:07.898
You were a really good friend to
me, and what I did was shitty.

1652
01:39:09.378 --> 01:39:13.034
But if it's any consolation,
I-- I did stop you

1653
01:39:13.077 --> 01:39:16.515
from marrying a girl
that'd sleep with a guy like me.

1654
01:39:16.559 --> 01:39:18.648
You sorry piece of shit.

1655
01:39:18.691 --> 01:39:22.130
Listen to me. If you're calling
to try and get on the show,

1656
01:39:22.173 --> 01:39:26.221
let me tell you,
it'll be a cold day in hell before I let that happen.

1657
01:39:26.264 --> 01:39:29.876
Goodbye. And go fuck yourself!

1658
01:39:29.920 --> 01:39:31.400
Ross, I'm dyin'.

1659
01:39:33.054 --> 01:39:34.098
What?

1660
01:39:35.621 --> 01:39:38.233
Yeah, my liver's blown out.

1661
01:39:38.276 --> 01:39:39.886
Big surprise, huh?

1662
01:39:39.930 --> 01:39:44.152
I'm-- I'm dyin'.

1663
01:39:44.195 --> 01:39:46.545
If you expect me
to feel bad for you,

1664
01:39:46.589 --> 01:39:48.504
you called the wrong place.

1665
01:39:49.548 --> 01:39:51.637
I get it. I-- I don't blame you.

1666
01:39:51.681 --> 01:39:56.207
I just needed to say
that I'm sorry and that I regret it, and...

1667
01:39:57.643 --> 01:40:00.733
and that's not
the only reason I'm calling.

1668
01:40:00.777 --> 01:40:03.171
You remember my son, David?

1669
01:40:04.215 --> 01:40:06.565
You mean the kid you ran out on?

1670
01:40:06.609 --> 01:40:11.092
Yeah. Well, he's 21 now,
and guess what?

1671
01:40:11.135 --> 01:40:13.355
He's a stand-up comedian.

1672
01:40:13.398 --> 01:40:17.837
And, uh, I'm telling you,
Ross, the kid's funny.

1673
01:40:19.361 --> 01:40:21.450
You-- Listen to me.

1674
01:40:21.493 --> 01:40:26.455
Whatever you think about me,
I-- I take it. I deserve it.

1675
01:40:26.498 --> 01:40:28.848
But you know that I know funny.

1676
01:40:29.936 --> 01:40:32.635
And, uh, I just want you
to take a look at him.

1677
01:40:32.678 --> 01:40:35.638
His name's Dave Moranto.

1678
01:40:35.681 --> 01:40:39.555
He's in New York.
He's got a set up on YouTube.

1679
01:40:39.598 --> 01:40:43.341
Uh, we don't talk anymore,
but...

1680
01:40:43.385 --> 01:40:48.085
And he doesn't know
that I'm calling you, and I'd prefer he doesn't know.

1681
01:40:48.129 --> 01:40:49.260
And...

1682
01:40:51.306 --> 01:40:52.829
and that's it.

1683
01:40:55.092 --> 01:40:57.921
And Ross, you know...

1684
01:40:57.964 --> 01:41:01.707
try to remember
some of the laughs we had.

1685
01:41:01.751 --> 01:41:05.494
I'd rather you remember me
like that than,

1686
01:41:05.537 --> 01:41:08.932
you know, over some
bullshit transgression.

1687
01:41:15.982 --> 01:41:17.071
Jimmy?

1688
01:42:13.736 --> 01:42:15.912
Oh, shit. What time is it?

1689
01:42:17.696 --> 01:42:18.784
Can I...

1690
01:42:43.418 --> 01:42:44.854
Hey, comedian.

1691
01:42:46.421 --> 01:42:49.685
You're not here
to drink or watch TV.

1692
01:42:50.860 --> 01:42:52.949
Come on. You're up.

1693
01:43:32.249 --> 01:43:38.995
<i>♪ Now the time has come</i>
<i>To say goodbye ♪</i>

1694
01:43:39.038 --> 01:43:45.393
<i>♪ I'm sorry for the times</i>
<i>I made you cry ♪</i>

1695
01:43:45.436 --> 01:43:52.008
<i>♪ But there's one thing that</i>
<i>I wish on my behalf ♪</i>

1696
01:43:53.227 --> 01:43:55.446
<i>♪ Remember me ♪</i>

1697
01:43:55.490 --> 01:44:01.104
<i>♪ For how I made you laugh ♪</i>

1698
01:44:06.631 --> 01:44:10.461
<i>♪ Don't dwell on</i>
<i>My transgressions ♪</i>

1699
01:44:10.505 --> 01:44:13.682
<i>♪ And my selfish ways ♪</i>

1700
01:44:13.725 --> 01:44:19.818
<i>♪ Try instead remembering</i>
<i>Brighter days ♪</i>

1701
01:44:19.862 --> 01:44:25.259
<i>♪ Because I hope that</i>
<i>For my epitaph ♪</i>

1702
01:44:26.869 --> 01:44:29.480
<i>♪ You'll think of me ♪</i>

1703
01:44:29.524 --> 01:44:34.833
<i>♪ And how I made you laugh ♪</i>

1704
01:44:36.835 --> 01:44:40.274
<i>♪ Time goes by so fast ♪</i>

1705
01:44:40.317 --> 01:44:43.755
<i>♪ And today becomes the past ♪</i>

1706
01:44:43.799 --> 01:44:46.584
<i>♪ The only thing to last ♪</i>

1707
01:44:46.628 --> 01:44:51.372
<i>♪ Is what we remember ♪</i>

1708
01:44:55.854 --> 01:45:02.252
<i>♪ So now it's time to travel</i>
<i>Down that lonesome road ♪</i>

1709
01:45:02.296 --> 01:45:08.563
<i>♪ Thank you for the love</i>
<i>You always showed ♪</i>

1710
01:45:08.606 --> 01:45:14.351
<i>♪ Though I often strayed far</i>
<i>From that righteous path ♪</i>

1711
01:45:15.613 --> 01:45:18.094
<i>♪ Remember me ♪</i>

1712
01:45:18.137 --> 01:45:25.057
<i>♪ For how I made you laugh ♪</i>

1713
01:45:25.101 --> 01:45:28.017
<i>♪ Remember me ♪</i>

1714
01:45:28.060 --> 01:45:34.937
<i>♪ For how I made you laugh ♪</i>