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Downloaded from
YTS.MX
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Okay, Will,
whenever you're ready.
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.MX
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Okay, just walking
into the room and
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sitting down the way you sometimes see
at the top of a documentary.
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Where they use the B-roll,
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but the person... the subject
didn't realize they were gonna use it.
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But it's all natural.
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Hi there. I'm Will Ferrell.
One of the greatest actors in the world.
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A long time ago,
back when I was at Saturday Night Live...
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Will Ferrell.
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I haven't made
a lot of friends here. Really.
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...I met a guy named Andrew Steele.
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He was hired as a writer
the same week I was hired to perform.
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Hello, I'm Robert Goulet.
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He wrote a bunch of sketches for me.
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Hello, you got Saddam.
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And he eventually became
the head writer of SNL.
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Will you put the antlers down?
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Andrew was Iowa-born and raised.
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501 jeans,
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shitty beer,
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hitchhiking type of guy.
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Three days.
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No sleep.
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Basically, a lovable curmudgeon
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with a super weird,
creative sense of humor.
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We worked
at Saturday Night Live for years,
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and he kept bringing up
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that he wanted to do
an after-school special.
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Do you know the dangers
of diabetic ketoacidosis?
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We goofed off a lot.
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We drank a lot.
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If you've ever
scratched your head and said,
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"Why did Will Ferrell make that?"
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there's a good chance
Andrew Steele was involved.
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Why did I make a Lifetime TV movie?
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Sarah can work.
I'll stay at home with the kids.
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Why did I make a movie all in Spanish?
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{\an8} Let's have
a race back to the house!
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{\an8} Why did I make
a bunch of commercials for a shitty beer?
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While this was all happening,
we both got married,
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became dads,
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and, over the years,
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he became one of my closest friends.
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When the pandemic hit,
we didn't see each other for a long time.
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And then one day, I was in the middle
of shooting a movie in Boston,
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and I got this email from Andrew.
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"Hey, Will."
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"Something I need you to know."
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"I'm old now,
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and, as ridiculous and unnecessary
as it may seem to report,
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I'll be transitioning to live as a woman."
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"In the last ten years,
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I've been trying to understand
what's going on."
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"Tried to get rid of it
over and over again throughout my life."
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"Now I'm giving up the fight."
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"When I was young,
I thought all boys felt like me."
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"Then I thought,
'Maybe I'm just a weirdo.'"
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"Then I pushed it away for many years
and ended up in therapy."
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"It's a wonderful thing
when your mind and body
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revolt against the unnatural,
despondent thing you've become."
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"I doubt being a trans woman
will change my personality that much."
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"Instead of an asshole, I'll be a bitch."
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"I think it's made me a lot happier."
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"I'd like to say my happiness
translates to a bright, carefree future
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full of courage and confidence,
but no such luck."
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"I... I carry self-doubt and fear around me,
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like the comedian I've been
my whole life."
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"I'm not gonna be good at this."
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"It's really going to be slow
and awkward and terrifying and joyful."
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"Mainly, I'm hoping
I don't lose anyone I care about."
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"Thanks, name forthcoming."
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That letter was really hard to send.
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I kept rewriting it
over and over again and
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trying to say what I wanted to say.
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It was just... whoa.
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This is... crazy.
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The biggest question when people come out
of the closet is, "Will I still be loved?"
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I've met trans people
who were not loved when they came out.
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I don't doubt that Will is my friend,
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but I'm not Andrew Steele anymore.
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Okay, where do we go from here?
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When I sent
the email out to Will,
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he responded pretty quickly
that he supported me coming out.
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♪ All by myself
Alone at home feeling blue... ♪
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I wrote her a note
saying I loved her and supported her,
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and we'd check in with each other
whenever we could.
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Oh!
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Jackpot!
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But... I still had a lot of questions.
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And I have
a lot of questions I wanna ask Will.
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Like what does being trans mean to him?
Does he think I'm a woman?
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Does he know any trans people besides me?
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Why the name Harper?
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And how long did she feel this way?
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What made her keep this in for so long?
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Is he curious about hormones
and surgeries and hair removal?
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Does he wanna ask me all the questions
you're not supposed to ask trans people?
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Does she still like shitty beer?
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Why does he think
Natty Light is a terrible beer?
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Or is she just totally into wine now?
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It's a fucking delicious beer.
It's the best beer out there.
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How am I supposed to treat her?
Does she want it to change?
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Will I be making a completely new friend?
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Hello?
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So then he called me,
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and his idea at the time was, he knows
that I've been across this country
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almost as much as a truck driver.
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I've driven it. I hitchhiked. I...
I've been everywhere. I love it so much.
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I made it.
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I just don't know
if it loves me back right now.
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After she had come out and transitioned,
she had kind of lamented,
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"Gosh, I don't know if I can go
to these same places as Harper."
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A kind of light bulb went off in my head
and was like,
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"Harper, would you wanna do a road trip
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where we visit these places
as this new version of yourself?"
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"And at the same time,
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we'd figure out
what this all means to us."
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♪ I drive a big freightliner
An' I made my last payment today ♪
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♪ An' I drive to all the points
Outta New York City to LA... ♪
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When I road-tripped as a guy,
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I brought three T-shirts,
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three underwears...
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...and a pair of jeans.
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Yeah, this is gonna be hard.
And the shoes are the hardest part.
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Oh my God.
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Every way
that this suitcase can be expanded,
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I'm going to expand it.
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♪ Giddyup-go... ♪
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Okay.
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♪ Gonna pass Red Simpson
And his runaway truck... ♪
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I just brought a couple pair of shoes
'cause that's all you really need.
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I got this deer hunter jacket,
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which I'll probably hardly wear.
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Sherlock Holmes costume.
I think I should bring it.
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I'm just worried this isn't gonna fit.
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Dang it.
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I have to leave the alto sax.
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You gotta bring chairs
on a road trip.
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Gotta have chairs, a cooler.
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You never know when you're gonna stop
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and need to drink a cold Natty Light
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or whatever Will drinks.
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Some kind of craft beer.
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Probably tastes like an orange.
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Harper.
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Look at you.
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- I'm stuck in Dallas right now.
-
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We got diverted
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'cause there was
a air pressure situation in the cabin.
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I incessantly rang my call button.
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- I said, "Do they need help up there?"
- Right. Of course.
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And they said, "Please, sir."
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- You're--
-"Please relax."
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And I said, " You relax."
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So we actua--
We got thrown off the flight.
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You're picking me up, right?
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- Gonna pick you up in the city.
- All right.
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- Hey, I'll see you in New York, okay?
- Okay. Bye-bye.
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We have
16 days out there on the road.
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I'm sure a lot of things will come up,
but... it... it's weird.
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We are good friends.
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But are we?
Like, it's a weird thing to say.
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I was always Harper Steele.
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So Will was always
friends with Harper Steele.
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But there was this persona
that he was also friends with
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that I don't particularly like
or need right now.
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Harper, I made it onto the flight.
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Um...
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All systems go.
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So many of us don't know
what the rules of engagement are.
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And in terms of our friendship
and our relationship,
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it's... it's... it's uncharted waters.
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I'll see you later. Bye.
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I don't know why
he picked some weird spot.
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Maybe it's just a celebrity thing.
He doesn't like to be out in the open.
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What the fuck? Oh my God.
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Yeah.
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You made it.
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Thanks for picking me up.
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- What is this?
- Yeah. Van Cortlandt.
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- Oh, that's--
- Remember?
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- Oh, hey, old buddy.
- How are ya?
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I do remember.
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- Remember all our--
- Yeah, we golfed up here two times.
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I still have my... my card.
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My New York City golf permit.
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- Wanna get in a round?
- Let's get in a round.
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Okay. Oh Jesus.
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- You look great, by the way.
- Oh, hey, thank you.
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I love your jacket.
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00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:05,373
- I'm an expert packer.
- Oh yeah. That's--
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- There we go.
- Yeah, no. That'll stay.
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I can't wait to get in this.
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How does this baby handle?
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Uh, shittily.
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- It handles shittily.
- Shag carpet everywhere.
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00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:22,723
- So comfortable.
- Oh, it's so luxurious.
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00:11:22,723 --> 00:11:25,184
- So luxurious. Let's go.
- All right, let's go.
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I'd say we're gonna leave the city,
but I wanna have breakfast with my kids,
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and then we'll hit the road after that.
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I'm excited to see your kids again.
I haven't seen them in a long time.
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Hey!
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- Hey!
- Hi, guys.
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00:11:53,462 --> 00:11:55,840
- Good morning.
- Good morning.
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00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:58,134
- How you doing, buddy?
- Good to see ya.
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00:11:58,134 --> 00:11:59,969
Emma, I haven't seen you...
When was the last...
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I saw you at SNL one time, I think,
like, maybe three or four...
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00:12:04,432 --> 00:12:06,684
- Before the pandemic.
- I met you even before that.
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00:12:06,684 --> 00:12:08,686
- You guys were all super little.
- Yeah.
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00:12:08,686 --> 00:12:11,731
And at one point,
you brought out a little tiny saxophone?
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00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:12,648
- I did?
- Yeah.
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00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:14,859
And you started doing a bit, like...
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00:12:14,859 --> 00:12:16,902
♪ Playing in a family band ♪
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- Really?
- And then--
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00:12:18,028 --> 00:12:21,532
- I didn't know you could play.
- Then I played a little instrument.
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00:12:21,532 --> 00:12:25,745
And you two just stared at us like,
"This is not funny, nor is it good."
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00:12:28,038 --> 00:12:30,249
- Now here's the dilemma.
- Okay, uh-oh.
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00:12:30,249 --> 00:12:31,834
- There's a Greek omelet.
- Yeah.
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00:12:31,834 --> 00:12:33,502
And there's an Athenian omelet.
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00:12:33,502 --> 00:12:35,004
The--
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- Hello. Take your order?
- Hello.
224
00:12:37,256 --> 00:12:38,758
- Yes.
- What shall I get you?
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00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:42,136
- Okay.
- Do you have sis-- some tzatziki?
226
00:12:42,136 --> 00:12:44,054
- Yeah, we do.
- Oh!
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00:12:44,054 --> 00:12:47,099
- It's a Greek diner.
- For the table. Tzatziki for the table.
228
00:12:47,099 --> 00:12:49,226
- No--
- No, not for the table.
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- Thank you so much.
- Thank you. Thank you.
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00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:55,691
Um... uh... What... So...
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I wanna be clear.
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00:12:58,903 --> 00:13:01,155
Harper, you still... Harper's still Dad.
233
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,532
Harper's still Dad, still Pop.
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00:13:03,532 --> 00:13:04,533
- Pop.
- Pop.
235
00:13:04,533 --> 00:13:06,118
But pronouns, she.
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00:13:06,118 --> 00:13:07,453
- She.
- Yeah.
237
00:13:07,453 --> 00:13:10,706
Harper's still Dad because she said
she was Dad, you know?
238
00:13:10,706 --> 00:13:14,251
How... how did you give the news?
Did you guys all get together?
239
00:13:14,251 --> 00:13:15,544
- No.
- No, email.
240
00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:16,837
- Just like you.
- Oh.
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00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:19,256
I was at Popeyes.
I was picking up my biscuit.
242
00:13:19,256 --> 00:13:21,342
- Right.
- And I go, "Holy shit."
243
00:13:21,342 --> 00:13:23,385
- Holy shit.
-"I gotta pull over for this."
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00:13:23,385 --> 00:13:27,556
I mean, when the divorce happened,
we kind of knew a little bit.
245
00:13:27,556 --> 00:13:31,310
We got that note about... from Harper
about how we might find women's clothes.
246
00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:33,437
She was wearing women's clothes.
I was like, "Okay."
247
00:13:33,437 --> 00:13:38,609
And then after that, we got the full,
you know, "I'm using she/her pronouns."
248
00:13:38,609 --> 00:13:40,820
- Yeah.
- So it felt gradual to me.
249
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,238
It didn't feel like a shock.
250
00:13:42,238 --> 00:13:44,073
For the most part,
251
00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:46,408
you guys just took it in stride.
Or was it--
252
00:13:46,408 --> 00:13:49,036
- It was easy to accept immediately.
- Right.
253
00:13:49,036 --> 00:13:50,663
But, um, for me,
254
00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:54,500
I think I had a moment of, like, um...
255
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:57,461
My dad was
my only sort of masculine representation,
256
00:13:57,461 --> 00:13:59,880
and so I sort of idolized that
in a weird way.
257
00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:02,508
Still my dad, but I think, for me,
258
00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:05,469
the only thing I lost
was that masculine figure,
259
00:14:05,469 --> 00:14:07,346
but you don't really need it.
260
00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:10,641
- Food is here!
- Gorgeous.
261
00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:12,601
- You're gonna love it.
- You called it.
262
00:14:12,601 --> 00:14:16,063
- And tza-tza-tza-tza...
- Yes. Everyone, get your own.
263
00:14:16,063 --> 00:14:18,858
- Yes! Tza... Yeah, tza-tza-tza...
- Tzatziki!
264
00:14:20,276 --> 00:14:23,237
- Aah.
- You guys know what we're doing?
265
00:14:23,737 --> 00:14:24,613
- Yeah.
- Okay.
266
00:14:24,613 --> 00:14:27,616
Are you guys worried about me
on this trip at all?
267
00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:31,495
I think I'm more worried
about your mental health.
268
00:14:31,495 --> 00:14:33,747
I'm more worried
about your physical safety.
269
00:14:33,747 --> 00:14:34,665
- Yeah.
- Like...
270
00:14:34,665 --> 00:14:39,962
But also, the things you love scare me
sometimes. Being in the middle of nowhere.
271
00:14:39,962 --> 00:14:41,046
- Yeah.
- Especially--
272
00:14:41,046 --> 00:14:44,008
I'm actually learning to be
a little more afraid of that stuff.
273
00:14:44,008 --> 00:14:45,676
After this transition, it's scary.
274
00:14:45,676 --> 00:14:48,262
I'll be honest, I wrestle with, like,
"Why am I doing this?"
275
00:14:48,262 --> 00:14:50,723
And, um, at first, I was like,
"I'm not gonna do it."
276
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:53,142
And then I just started to think about,
277
00:14:53,142 --> 00:14:57,021
like, well, coming out
was really hard for me,
278
00:14:57,021 --> 00:15:00,107
and, um, it may be... stupid,
279
00:15:00,107 --> 00:15:04,612
but I felt like that might be a good way
for me to come out more, basically.
280
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:05,654
- Yeah.
- Like...
281
00:15:05,654 --> 00:15:08,198
Does it help to know I take jujitsu?
282
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:11,035
- Yeah.
- Twice a month.
283
00:15:11,035 --> 00:15:13,829
Could you demonstrate something
or send a video?
284
00:15:13,829 --> 00:15:15,623
'Cause I... I... I don't see it,
285
00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:18,083
but I could... I guess I could see it, but...
286
00:15:18,083 --> 00:15:21,378
I usually don't like to do my practice
on a full stomach.
287
00:15:21,378 --> 00:15:22,421
- Okay.
- Yeah.
288
00:15:22,421 --> 00:15:23,923
All right. Well...
289
00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:25,674
Yeah. Uh...
290
00:15:26,508 --> 00:15:28,385
Yeah, we gotta get going, but I really--
291
00:15:28,385 --> 00:15:30,346
I could talk to you guys
on the phone tomorrow.
292
00:15:30,346 --> 00:15:31,931
- Yeah, sure.
- All right, yeah.
293
00:15:32,514 --> 00:15:34,475
- I love you.
- I love you. Bye.
294
00:15:34,475 --> 00:15:35,643
- I love you too.
- Hey.
295
00:15:36,143 --> 00:15:38,103
- I love you.
- I love you so much.
296
00:15:43,233 --> 00:15:46,612
- By the way, for the record...
- Yeah, for the record.
297
00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:48,989
I'm very excited
to be on this trip with you.
298
00:15:49,490 --> 00:15:50,950
- Oh good. Yeah.
- Yeah.
299
00:15:53,494 --> 00:15:55,037
- Let me ask you this.
- Yeah.
300
00:15:55,037 --> 00:15:57,122
Saturday Night Live.
301
00:15:57,122 --> 00:15:58,332
- Oh yeah.
- Right?
302
00:15:58,332 --> 00:16:00,459
Back to where it all started,
where we first met.
303
00:16:01,210 --> 00:16:03,253
- Have you been back in the buil--
- No.
304
00:16:03,253 --> 00:16:04,296
Wow!
305
00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:08,467
By the way, when we see Lorne,
let's both hug him, like, way too long.
306
00:16:09,510 --> 00:16:10,803
You can do that.
307
00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:13,430
- You can do it too.
- Okay, all right.
308
00:16:13,430 --> 00:16:15,641
Oh!
309
00:16:15,641 --> 00:16:18,978
- Oh, NBC Studios. Here we are.
- Oh, look at this.
310
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:20,604
Oh my goodness.
311
00:16:23,357 --> 00:16:25,442
Enter if you dare.
312
00:16:25,442 --> 00:16:28,696
♪ Boogum now, baby
You're casting your spell on me... ♪
313
00:16:30,572 --> 00:16:31,699
Bing!
314
00:16:31,699 --> 00:16:34,535
- Look at that fresh face.
- Look at that handsome young--
315
00:16:34,535 --> 00:16:35,744
Yeah, what happened?
316
00:16:35,744 --> 00:16:38,539
- One of the great Harper Steele creations.
- Mm.
317
00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:41,333
- "Oops, I Crapped My Pants."
- Oh shit.
318
00:16:43,752 --> 00:16:46,088
We're gonna do this.
We'll do this.
319
00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:47,089
Yeah.
320
00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:50,384
- Okay, we're gonna do a group hug.
- Okay, sure.
321
00:16:50,384 --> 00:16:53,679
♪ ...that I am crazy 'bout you? ♪
322
00:16:55,764 --> 00:16:58,559
♪ Now go on now with your bad self... ♪
323
00:16:59,601 --> 00:17:02,730
My office was right down there
when I had the windows.
324
00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:05,274
And all the girls, Maya and Amy,
325
00:17:05,274 --> 00:17:06,191
were in here.
326
00:17:08,152 --> 00:17:10,612
♪ Now mercy, mercy on me, all right... ♪
327
00:17:10,612 --> 00:17:12,573
Yeah, this was a terrifying room.
328
00:17:12,573 --> 00:17:16,744
Although I guess if you were in here
between dress and air as a writer,
329
00:17:16,744 --> 00:17:20,205
this was... actually meant
that your sketch got on, so...
330
00:17:21,457 --> 00:17:23,459
- Right.
- So that was a good thing.
331
00:17:24,960 --> 00:17:26,045
{\an8}I'm Will Ferrell,
332
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:31,050
{\an8}and, uh, this will be, uh, the voice
of the Chicago Cubs, Mr. Harry Caray.
333
00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:34,595
{\an8} That first week,
we went downstairs to lunch.
334
00:17:35,637 --> 00:17:38,474
And there was
just something about the two of us
335
00:17:38,474 --> 00:17:41,143
where we were
kind of on the same wavelength
336
00:17:41,143 --> 00:17:42,686
in a lot of different ways--
337
00:17:42,686 --> 00:17:45,856
I do remember
I was trying to get to know everyone.
338
00:17:45,856 --> 00:17:48,692
And there was a group of people
looking at me or like,
339
00:17:48,692 --> 00:17:51,820
"We don't get what this guy does.
He doesn't seem that funny."
340
00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:54,364
They all thought
Will Ferrell was a dud.
341
00:17:54,865 --> 00:17:56,658
But, you know, I just...
342
00:17:56,658 --> 00:17:58,702
I knew that Will was not the dud.
343
00:17:59,203 --> 00:18:01,663
You were just an ambassador for me
344
00:18:01,663 --> 00:18:05,042
to be like, "No, don't write him off.
He's actually really funny."
345
00:18:06,251 --> 00:18:07,628
Last read-through.
346
00:18:07,628 --> 00:18:09,880
Lots of food, lots of scripts.
347
00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:11,423
We've been around each other
348
00:18:11,423 --> 00:18:13,926
in a lot of circumstances
that are very strange.
349
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:16,386
My whole writing career,
my whole creative life,
350
00:18:16,887 --> 00:18:21,016
I performed as a character named Andrew.
That's the way I think about it, at least.
351
00:18:22,142 --> 00:18:26,605
And so coming out to my friends
was especially hard.
352
00:18:27,856 --> 00:18:31,652
And I really can't tell
if they think I'm Harper.
353
00:18:31,652 --> 00:18:34,947
I think they might think
that I'm still Andrew,
354
00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:36,323
and now I wear dresses.
355
00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:40,536
- Tina! Oh my goodness. Thank you.
- Yay!
356
00:18:40,536 --> 00:18:41,995
- Nice to see you!
- Oh my God.
357
00:18:41,995 --> 00:18:43,705
- Hey.
- Hey!
358
00:18:48,627 --> 00:18:51,380
Uh, thank you,
everyone, for coming.
359
00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:53,674
This is very heartening for me. I...
360
00:18:53,674 --> 00:18:57,052
When I came out,
all of you responded. Everyone--
361
00:18:57,052 --> 00:18:59,263
Tim was a little negative. But--
362
00:18:59,263 --> 00:19:01,265
I thought she was joking at first.
363
00:19:01,265 --> 00:19:05,060
- I fucking... I love him.
-"She's joking. This is not fucking real."
364
00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:08,939
I'm gonna send
the most racist, sexist jokes back to her
365
00:19:08,939 --> 00:19:10,190
and see what she says.
366
00:19:11,358 --> 00:19:12,693
- Hey, cheers.
- Yes.
367
00:19:12,693 --> 00:19:14,611
- Here's to Harper!
- Thank you!
368
00:19:14,611 --> 00:19:15,779
Thank... thank you.
369
00:19:15,779 --> 00:19:19,658
So you... you're driving.
You're driving for how long, where?
370
00:19:19,658 --> 00:19:22,077
Okay, we're gonna drive down to D.C.,
371
00:19:22,077 --> 00:19:24,872
and then
we're gonna cut down to Indianapolis.
372
00:19:24,872 --> 00:19:27,708
- We're gonna go see a Pacers game.
- Wow.
373
00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:30,210
Then we're gonna go to Iowa City,
374
00:19:30,210 --> 00:19:31,795
where I was raised.
375
00:19:31,795 --> 00:19:33,130
Do you have family there?
376
00:19:33,130 --> 00:19:35,465
My sister.
We're gonna walk through the old house.
377
00:19:35,465 --> 00:19:36,717
And then...
378
00:19:36,717 --> 00:19:37,759
Oklahoma, maybe?
379
00:19:37,759 --> 00:19:40,137
We're going to
the stock car race in Oklahoma.
380
00:19:40,137 --> 00:19:43,599
What are you most
looking forward to on this trip?
381
00:19:43,599 --> 00:19:44,766
Here's the thing.
382
00:19:44,766 --> 00:19:47,019
- Will proposed the idea...
- Yeah.
383
00:19:47,019 --> 00:19:50,314
...knowing that my transition might change
384
00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:52,816
the way I navigate the country,
which is true.
385
00:19:52,816 --> 00:19:54,902
- That is true.
- Absolutely true.
386
00:19:54,902 --> 00:19:56,987
- I fear it. I do fear it.
- Sure.
387
00:19:56,987 --> 00:20:00,365
Um, Will knows that I like shitty bars,
I like truck stops.
388
00:20:00,365 --> 00:20:03,035
- I like the lowest, worst places.
- Mm-hmm.
389
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:04,203
Yes!
390
00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:07,831
I walked down an alley
a couple... a couple weeks ago,
391
00:20:07,831 --> 00:20:10,417
and I was like, "Nope, I don't like this."
392
00:20:10,417 --> 00:20:12,461
- Don't do that...
- Not safe for you anymore.
393
00:20:12,461 --> 00:20:15,422
- Yeah.
- When is it safe to walk down an alley?
394
00:20:16,882 --> 00:20:21,220
No one's ever asked a you
for the list of your places.
395
00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,597
If anyone goes somewhere
where you've been,
396
00:20:23,597 --> 00:20:25,390
no one said, "Ooh, I'd love your list."
397
00:20:25,390 --> 00:20:29,311
"What corners have
the best dumpsters of found furniture?"
398
00:20:29,311 --> 00:20:31,230
And I have that list.
399
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:32,773
Will will be in the car.
400
00:20:32,773 --> 00:20:35,484
I'm a narcoleptic,
and I'm not a good driver.
401
00:20:38,695 --> 00:20:40,405
♪ Say look-a-here, mister ♪
402
00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:47,371
♪ I need a place to stay tonight... ♪
403
00:20:47,371 --> 00:20:50,791
♪ A hotel room is fine... ♪
404
00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:53,126
- How are you feeling?
- Good.
405
00:20:53,126 --> 00:20:56,380
All right, fine.
Well, there's no turning back now, so...
406
00:20:56,380 --> 00:20:58,924
Oh, okay. Oh jeez.
407
00:20:58,924 --> 00:21:01,009
♪ I'm only passing through, mister ♪
408
00:21:01,009 --> 00:21:03,470
♪ There's a long road ahead ♪
409
00:21:05,097 --> 00:21:07,808
♪ I got a lot to leave behind ♪
410
00:21:09,184 --> 00:21:11,687
♪ That's the gospel truth, mister... ♪
411
00:21:12,479 --> 00:21:15,399
- Okay, so here's a question.
- Okay. Oh, okay.
412
00:21:15,399 --> 00:21:18,277
I'm curious
how you settled on your name.
413
00:21:18,277 --> 00:21:20,320
Yeah. So my dead name's Andrew.
414
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:21,905
- I was Andrew, you know.
- Yeah.
415
00:21:21,905 --> 00:21:22,823
Um...
416
00:21:23,991 --> 00:21:28,996
And... So my first impulse
was to make it easy on everyone else.
417
00:21:31,123 --> 00:21:32,207
You know? Like, this...
418
00:21:32,207 --> 00:21:36,295
I'm... I'm... I'm like, "Hey, I'm... Hey,
there's nothing weird going on over here."
419
00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:38,338
-"So I'm just changing--"
-"Nothing to see."
420
00:21:38,338 --> 00:21:41,091
"Nothing to see.
I'm just gonna change Andrew to Angie."
421
00:21:41,091 --> 00:21:42,884
-"You guys, that's pretty easy."
- Yeah.
422
00:21:42,884 --> 00:21:47,014
And then I was driving down
to my first electrolysis thing,
423
00:21:47,014 --> 00:21:49,266
and I was saying the name in my head,
424
00:21:49,266 --> 00:21:51,768
and it just sounded like
wet cardboard to me.
425
00:21:51,768 --> 00:21:54,813
- Yeah.
- It sounded like, "Ugh. This is wrong."
426
00:21:54,813 --> 00:21:59,192
So I started trying to,
like, imagine other names.
427
00:21:59,192 --> 00:22:02,863
Like, I mean, I was thinking Chandelier.
428
00:22:03,989 --> 00:22:07,034
And then I go,
"Harper. You love the name Harper."
429
00:22:07,034 --> 00:22:11,955
My mother went to school with Harper Lee,
430
00:22:11,955 --> 00:22:15,334
the person, the woman
who wrote To Kill a Mockingbird.
431
00:22:15,334 --> 00:22:18,920
- Right.
- When I said it, my whole body felt warm.
432
00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:20,505
- Wow.
- And I was like--
433
00:22:20,505 --> 00:22:24,301
- You literally had a visceral reaction.
- I did. I said it out loud.
434
00:22:24,301 --> 00:22:26,595
I was saying them out loud.
I said, "Harper."
435
00:22:26,595 --> 00:22:30,557
And I was like, "Ooh, wow. That...
That's it. That's what it's gonna be."
436
00:22:30,557 --> 00:22:31,808
- Gosh.
- And that was it.
437
00:22:32,768 --> 00:22:35,062
Yeah, if you had to change your name,
what would you do?
438
00:22:35,562 --> 00:22:37,814
I hated my name growing up.
439
00:22:37,814 --> 00:22:39,775
My real name is John William.
440
00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:44,112
- But my folks called me Will.
- Yeah.
441
00:22:44,112 --> 00:22:45,697
And I remember in first grade,
442
00:22:45,697 --> 00:22:50,410
there were six or seven kids
who either had the name Mike or Steve.
443
00:22:50,410 --> 00:22:51,328
Oh, okay.
444
00:22:51,328 --> 00:22:52,913
And I just was like, "Please."
445
00:22:52,913 --> 00:22:55,499
-"Why can't I be a Mike or a Steve?"
-"Or a Steve."
446
00:22:55,499 --> 00:22:59,002
- Those names were cool and tough.
-"Why do I have this weird name?"
447
00:22:59,002 --> 00:23:01,213
- And hard. Yeah. I would--
- Like Steve.
448
00:23:01,213 --> 00:23:02,297
"What's up, Steve?"
449
00:23:02,297 --> 00:23:03,423
- Yeah.
- And Mike.
450
00:23:06,343 --> 00:23:08,720
I'm gonna take this time
to thank you
451
00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:11,807
for letting us visit the nation's capital.
452
00:23:12,432 --> 00:23:14,017
One of my favorite cities.
453
00:23:14,518 --> 00:23:18,021
- I'm not a big D.C. person.
- Oh, you don't love American history?
454
00:23:18,021 --> 00:23:20,565
Oh shit. Come on.
455
00:23:20,565 --> 00:23:24,111
- I just think D.C. is a little boring.
- We're gonna change that.
456
00:23:25,195 --> 00:23:27,656
I wanna show you
something that's very special.
457
00:23:27,656 --> 00:23:28,573
Okay.
458
00:23:29,241 --> 00:23:32,035
- It's right here.
- Uh-huh. Parking lot?
459
00:23:32,035 --> 00:23:33,328
The reflecting pool.
460
00:23:33,328 --> 00:23:36,039
- Oh, there's no water in it.
- There's some water.
461
00:23:37,082 --> 00:23:38,166
Right down here.
462
00:23:39,334 --> 00:23:41,086
Magnificent, right?
463
00:23:43,547 --> 00:23:44,631
Ooh, I'm nervous.
464
00:23:44,631 --> 00:23:45,882
Yeah, me too.
465
00:23:45,882 --> 00:23:49,261
The next 15 minutes, we could be
talking with President Joe Biden.
466
00:23:50,345 --> 00:23:52,889
- How do you think we're getting in there?
- 'Cause of this.
467
00:23:53,432 --> 00:23:54,433
- The moneymaker.
- Yeah.
468
00:23:54,433 --> 00:23:57,811
Is the president in there?
We just wanna say hi to the president.
469
00:23:57,811 --> 00:23:59,354
Hey! Joe!
470
00:23:59,980 --> 00:24:01,231
No, no, he's not there.
471
00:24:05,861 --> 00:24:08,363
You know, for years,
I crossed this country in a dress,
472
00:24:08,363 --> 00:24:09,906
but I never let anyone see me.
473
00:24:11,116 --> 00:24:12,909
So if I had to get out and get gas,
474
00:24:12,909 --> 00:24:16,329
there's this furtive,
and embarrassing, and hurried attempt
475
00:24:16,329 --> 00:24:18,165
to throw on
a pair of overalls or something.
476
00:24:18,165 --> 00:24:20,500
- And look like a guy and--
- Yeah.
477
00:24:20,500 --> 00:24:23,462
I used to bring
an emergency set of clothes with me.
478
00:24:23,462 --> 00:24:26,798
The fear of having a cop pull me over
for a speeding ticket...
479
00:24:27,716 --> 00:24:29,050
...and be dressed as a woman was...
480
00:24:29,050 --> 00:24:30,469
- It was horrible.
- Right.
481
00:24:30,469 --> 00:24:31,761
Now...
482
00:24:31,761 --> 00:24:33,972
...going out into the world just as me,
483
00:24:33,972 --> 00:24:38,268
without any chance
of going stealth as Andrew again,
484
00:24:38,894 --> 00:24:43,315
I will see the country that I love
as myself, which I've never done.
485
00:24:51,781 --> 00:24:55,785
If you don't mind, I'm gonna take a second
here to look through some old journals.
486
00:24:55,785 --> 00:24:56,912
Okay.
487
00:24:59,039 --> 00:25:00,707
Whoa, look at your journals.
488
00:25:01,875 --> 00:25:03,752
When did you start journaling?
489
00:25:03,752 --> 00:25:07,964
It wasn't till I felt
my life was kind of falling apart.
490
00:25:07,964 --> 00:25:12,177
And this one, uh,
it's called "Journal Number One."
491
00:25:12,177 --> 00:25:15,555
It's called
"Unmentionables and Other Private Stuff."
492
00:25:17,057 --> 00:25:19,392
Why did you type it
instead of longhand?
493
00:25:19,392 --> 00:25:23,063
I did it
because I wanted to just put it down.
494
00:25:23,063 --> 00:25:25,357
- Bad writing and all. Mistakes.
- Yeah.
495
00:25:25,357 --> 00:25:27,484
- Run-ons.
- All kinds of mistakes, yeah.
496
00:25:27,484 --> 00:25:32,447
- Stream of consciousness, yeah.
- This one's about my therapist.
497
00:25:33,782 --> 00:25:36,201
"My therapist today
batted down my silly notion
498
00:25:36,201 --> 00:25:38,411
that I might be a girl instead of a boy."
499
00:25:38,411 --> 00:25:40,330
- Wow.
-"She's not buying it."
500
00:25:40,330 --> 00:25:42,832
"At one point,
she said I was living in fantasy."
501
00:25:42,832 --> 00:25:43,750
Wow.
502
00:25:43,750 --> 00:25:46,670
"The weird feelings
of sickness and dread I described to her
503
00:25:46,670 --> 00:25:50,090
while I'm dressed in my male clothes
didn't make any sense to her."
504
00:25:50,590 --> 00:25:53,969
"She needed me to describe the feelings
to her, which I couldn't."
505
00:25:53,969 --> 00:25:56,263
"She seemed to think
dressing up like a woman
506
00:25:56,263 --> 00:25:59,182
has a lot of defiance and anger in it."
507
00:25:59,182 --> 00:26:00,725
"She's got a theory."
508
00:26:00,725 --> 00:26:03,478
"I, on the other hand,
am losing faith in theories."
509
00:26:04,521 --> 00:26:08,191
- Let's see. That's seven years ago.
- Wow.
510
00:26:15,365 --> 00:26:18,201
- I'll get snacks. You get chairs.
- All righty.
511
00:26:33,425 --> 00:26:35,051
You got us a lot of stuff.
512
00:26:35,051 --> 00:26:37,929
Well, we're on the road, buddy.
Pringles. You like Pringles?
513
00:26:37,929 --> 00:26:41,099
- I do. I love Pringles.
- I didn't know which Pringles you liked.
514
00:26:41,099 --> 00:26:43,310
You ready for this one? Fuego.
515
00:26:43,310 --> 00:26:44,436
Okay.
516
00:26:45,520 --> 00:26:49,733
- I am not having Fuego Pringles.
- Yeah, you are. Yeah. Yeah, you are.
517
00:26:49,733 --> 00:26:51,568
Oh, Scorchin' BBQ.
518
00:26:52,819 --> 00:26:56,156
- Oh, part of the Scorchin' line.
- That's-- Oh yeah. The whole Sco--
519
00:26:56,156 --> 00:26:58,450
We've gotta ration these.
520
00:26:58,450 --> 00:27:00,619
'Cause we may never
run into another Walmart.
521
00:27:00,619 --> 00:27:02,912
'Cause in case
we have a... a flat tire,
522
00:27:02,912 --> 00:27:03,997
we gotta ration.
523
00:27:03,997 --> 00:27:05,332
Yeah, exactly.
524
00:27:07,375 --> 00:27:10,462
Uh, I was gonna ask you
'cause I was thinking about it. Um...
525
00:27:11,212 --> 00:27:16,718
Were you a little worried about
how to talk to me when I came out to you?
526
00:27:20,388 --> 00:27:24,017
Sometimes, I think
that... people who aren't trans,
527
00:27:24,017 --> 00:27:27,479
I think they're sometimes afraid
to say the wrong thing around me.
528
00:27:27,479 --> 00:27:29,481
- That's what I'm getting at.
- Yeah.
529
00:27:29,481 --> 00:27:31,775
And I didn't know when I first saw you,
530
00:27:31,775 --> 00:27:35,320
and I was just curious
if there was anything there that--
531
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:37,447
I probably was...
532
00:27:40,700 --> 00:27:41,660
um...
533
00:27:42,952 --> 00:27:45,580
- Yeah, probably a little nervous.
- Okay.
534
00:27:45,580 --> 00:27:47,707
- In the sense--
- I mean, I was nervous.
535
00:27:48,792 --> 00:27:50,293
- I'm in a dress.
- Yes.
536
00:27:50,293 --> 00:27:51,961
It's like... That was terrifying.
537
00:27:51,961 --> 00:27:57,842
Yeah, I... I... I guess I was...
I was worried about what... If there...
538
00:27:57,842 --> 00:27:59,678
What the new ground rules were.
539
00:27:59,678 --> 00:28:02,389
- Okay, yeah.
- If there were any.
540
00:28:02,389 --> 00:28:06,059
- Yeah.
- Uh, if it was... um...
541
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:09,354
You know.
542
00:28:11,064 --> 00:28:15,527
Yeah, just how much
had quote/unquote changed,
543
00:28:15,527 --> 00:28:17,821
or was the same or what, you know.
544
00:28:17,821 --> 00:28:20,782
Yeah, that's a difficult one,
the changing and the sameness and--
545
00:28:20,782 --> 00:28:23,034
There are no ground rules with friends,
I'm telling you.
546
00:28:23,034 --> 00:28:24,369
That's what I need you to know.
547
00:28:24,369 --> 00:28:25,787
- But that's what--
- Yeah.
548
00:28:25,787 --> 00:28:29,499
- You immediately put me at ease.
- Yeah.
549
00:28:29,499 --> 00:28:33,503
Yeah, I don't... Well, 'cause I...
'cause I know there's no ill intention.
550
00:28:33,503 --> 00:28:37,006
So whatever you say,
I could not possibly be angry.
551
00:28:37,632 --> 00:28:39,175
- Yeah.
- Um...
552
00:28:40,677 --> 00:28:43,054
What else did I get here, buddy?
I got more Pringles.
553
00:28:43,054 --> 00:28:44,639
Philly Cheesesteak.
554
00:28:45,724 --> 00:28:49,144
- Man! You're the man!
- What about the woman?
555
00:28:49,144 --> 00:28:50,478
What about the woman?
556
00:28:50,979 --> 00:28:53,815
- You're still the woman.
- Yes! Still the woman! Yeah!
557
00:28:53,815 --> 00:28:55,358
- Whoo!
- Whoo!
558
00:28:59,487 --> 00:29:01,448
Oh, there she goes. Gah!
559
00:29:01,448 --> 00:29:04,951
- She's back in business.
- Back in business, oh yeah.
560
00:29:07,412 --> 00:29:08,413
Is there some reason
561
00:29:08,413 --> 00:29:10,999
why we're not stopping
at greasy diners every morning?
562
00:29:10,999 --> 00:29:14,586
- I don't know.
- It's my favorite kind of restaurant.
563
00:29:15,462 --> 00:29:18,423
The mecca. We are in the mecca.
564
00:29:19,841 --> 00:29:20,675
Hey there.
565
00:29:21,176 --> 00:29:24,095
- Hi, how are you? Thank you.
- Sit wherever you like.
566
00:29:24,804 --> 00:29:26,222
Kimberly, you like it all?
567
00:29:26,222 --> 00:29:29,142
- Our best one is, we got the All-Star.
- Yeah.
568
00:29:29,142 --> 00:29:32,103
- Done deal. That's what I'm getting.
- Two eggs, wheat, white, raisin toast.
569
00:29:32,103 --> 00:29:35,607
Bacon, ham, or sausage.
You get a waffle or a biscuit and gravy.
570
00:29:35,607 --> 00:29:36,941
- Two of those.
- Absolutely.
571
00:29:36,941 --> 00:29:38,693
- Wait.
- No, no, no, no, I'm just kidding.
572
00:29:39,527 --> 00:29:40,862
And how about you, sir?
573
00:29:41,863 --> 00:29:42,739
- Ma'am.
- Ma'am.
574
00:29:42,739 --> 00:29:45,074
- Ma'am. I am so sorry.
- That's okay.
575
00:29:45,074 --> 00:29:48,953
Ah, but that's quite all right.
I'm gonna get the, um, All-Star Special.
576
00:29:48,953 --> 00:29:51,748
All right. Thank you very much.
And I'll take your menus.
577
00:29:51,748 --> 00:29:52,957
- You're welcome.
- Great.
578
00:29:52,957 --> 00:29:53,875
Yeah.
579
00:29:55,126 --> 00:29:56,252
I have an order.
580
00:29:56,252 --> 00:30:00,298
I don't like being misgendered that much,
but what can I do, pal?
581
00:30:01,424 --> 00:30:04,260
- It's, uh...
- You know what?
582
00:30:04,260 --> 00:30:05,595
It's gonna ha-- I mean--
583
00:30:05,595 --> 00:30:08,056
It is gonna happen.
You know what you should do?
584
00:30:08,056 --> 00:30:11,392
You should go, "What do you want,
little lady who's a woman?"
585
00:30:11,392 --> 00:30:14,604
- Huh. "And for the little lady."
- "Now for the little lady--"
586
00:30:14,604 --> 00:30:16,356
- You don't have to.
- The little lady.
587
00:30:16,356 --> 00:30:18,983
- Who has wheat?
- Uh, I got the white.
588
00:30:18,983 --> 00:30:20,985
- I got the wheat.
- Wheat? There you go.
589
00:30:21,986 --> 00:30:25,240
You excited for the game tonight,
by the way?
590
00:30:25,740 --> 00:30:27,992
I'm excited. But I'll be honest.
591
00:30:27,992 --> 00:30:31,788
Walking through all those bros
in a bro-ey environment
592
00:30:31,788 --> 00:30:34,374
has been my hardest part of my--
593
00:30:34,374 --> 00:30:37,168
- Right.
- My, um, transition.
594
00:30:37,168 --> 00:30:39,546
I was that person.
I went to basketball games.
595
00:30:39,546 --> 00:30:41,464
- I know... I know the culture.
- Right.
596
00:30:41,464 --> 00:30:43,216
And I'm gonna go back in that culture,
597
00:30:43,216 --> 00:30:46,845
and there's a lot of that still in me
that does not like what's happening.
598
00:30:46,845 --> 00:30:50,265
- Yeah.
- And I'm not totally comfortable with it.
599
00:30:51,808 --> 00:30:53,560
- Here we go.
- Here we go.
600
00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:56,604
When I walk
into that basketball stadium...
601
00:30:56,604 --> 00:30:58,982
- You look fantastic.
- Oh, thank you.
602
00:30:58,982 --> 00:31:01,192
- I love the jacket.
- I worked on it.
603
00:31:01,192 --> 00:31:04,737
...I am a woman,
and that's how I need to be seen.
604
00:31:04,737 --> 00:31:08,533
But I'm not sure...
It's just they may not see me that way.
605
00:31:09,033 --> 00:31:10,451
This is an odd thing to say.
606
00:31:10,451 --> 00:31:12,620
- I may not see myself that way.
- Mm-hmm.
607
00:31:12,620 --> 00:31:14,289
But you sort of running point
608
00:31:14,289 --> 00:31:17,417
makes this a fuck of a lot easier
than if I was just alone,
609
00:31:17,417 --> 00:31:20,086
and I gotta keep that in mind
throughout this trip.
610
00:31:20,086 --> 00:31:23,464
'Cause, obviously,
I'm getting a little free pass here,
611
00:31:23,464 --> 00:31:25,884
but I'm not saying
it's not gonna be difficult.
612
00:31:33,975 --> 00:31:38,146
I gotta tell you,
we've been to a lot of Laker games.
613
00:31:38,146 --> 00:31:39,063
Yeah.
614
00:31:39,063 --> 00:31:42,984
I've never seen Jack Nicholson,
I've never seen Leonardo DiCaprio,
615
00:31:42,984 --> 00:31:45,904
I've never seen Vince Vaughn
at a basketball game
616
00:31:45,904 --> 00:31:47,739
sitting next to their trans friend.
617
00:31:47,739 --> 00:31:50,783
- Right.
- I've just never seen it myself.
618
00:31:56,664 --> 00:31:57,540
Yo!
619
00:31:58,583 --> 00:32:02,253
It's so complicated
because I used sports all the time
620
00:32:03,379 --> 00:32:07,634
to let people know that I was not a woman.
621
00:32:08,635 --> 00:32:13,598
I mean, not that women can't like sports,
but I was trying to... you know...
622
00:32:14,265 --> 00:32:17,143
- Yeah, try-- You were always-- Yeah.
- I was trying to be that guy.
623
00:32:17,143 --> 00:32:19,145
By doing that all the time,
624
00:32:19,145 --> 00:32:21,564
I did learn a lot about sports,
625
00:32:21,564 --> 00:32:24,025
and I do kind of like it.
626
00:32:26,986 --> 00:32:28,696
Oh!
627
00:32:28,696 --> 00:32:30,198
- Yeah!
- Yes!
628
00:32:31,115 --> 00:32:32,283
Wow.
629
00:32:32,283 --> 00:32:35,244
All right, Pacer fans,
I need you to cheer.
630
00:32:35,244 --> 00:32:37,121
I got a special guest.
631
00:32:37,622 --> 00:32:40,124
Let me hear you, Pacer fans!
632
00:32:41,876 --> 00:32:43,670
What do we think of the Sixers?
633
00:32:45,213 --> 00:32:47,173
What do we think of the Pacers?
634
00:32:48,341 --> 00:32:50,510
Sixers!
635
00:32:50,510 --> 00:32:54,138
Pacers!
636
00:32:54,138 --> 00:32:57,600
I wanna thank you, Indianapolis.
I'm here with my friend Harper Steele.
637
00:32:57,600 --> 00:32:59,686
- She just transitioned.
- Wait, we're off. We're off.
638
00:32:59,686 --> 00:33:01,771
We're off.
639
00:33:01,771 --> 00:33:04,232
Indy, you've showed us nothing but love.
640
00:33:04,232 --> 00:33:06,484
- We're off.
- Thank you!
641
00:33:06,484 --> 00:33:07,777
Woo-hoo!
642
00:33:08,945 --> 00:33:11,322
Great to see Will Ferrell here.
643
00:33:11,864 --> 00:33:13,199
Uh, there's the governor.
644
00:33:13,199 --> 00:33:16,035
Just over there,
kinda trying to get him off the court
645
00:33:16,035 --> 00:33:17,662
so we can start the game.
646
00:33:18,705 --> 00:33:22,208
So you're working your way across
the country? How do you end up here?
647
00:33:22,208 --> 00:33:24,877
Harper and I
have known each other for 30 years,
648
00:33:24,877 --> 00:33:28,131
and we're, uh,
we're going across the country.
649
00:33:28,798 --> 00:33:32,176
- To basketball field houses or anything?
- No, this was just--
650
00:33:32,760 --> 00:33:35,805
This is our first
professional sporting event
651
00:33:35,805 --> 00:33:37,432
since Harper's transition.
652
00:33:37,432 --> 00:33:41,227
So the Pacers were nice enough
to allow us access.
653
00:33:41,227 --> 00:33:44,272
Pacers have the ball
to start the quarter up one.
654
00:33:47,150 --> 00:33:49,902
Oh man, it's started.
655
00:33:50,403 --> 00:33:52,822
Wait, was that the governor of this state?
656
00:33:52,822 --> 00:33:53,740
Mm-hmm.
657
00:33:57,118 --> 00:33:58,286
What's his name?
658
00:34:01,664 --> 00:34:02,582
Eric Holcomb.
659
00:34:03,541 --> 00:34:04,876
- Holcomb?
- Yep.
660
00:34:04,876 --> 00:34:06,085
Where do you see that?
661
00:34:07,754 --> 00:34:10,423
We start
with breaking news out of Indianapolis
662
00:34:10,423 --> 00:34:13,342
as Indiana Governor Eric Holcomb
signs a bill
663
00:34:13,342 --> 00:34:16,387
banning all gender-affirming care
for minors...
664
00:34:16,387 --> 00:34:19,807
A number of bills relating
to health care, access to bathrooms...
665
00:34:19,807 --> 00:34:23,811
More than 70 LGBTQ bills
have been filed in the Texas legislature.
666
00:34:23,811 --> 00:34:25,772
...makes Kansas the 20th state...
667
00:34:25,772 --> 00:34:28,524
North Dakota's governor
signed a bill into law...
668
00:34:28,524 --> 00:34:31,694
...provide a legal definition
of sex across the Tennessee code.
669
00:34:31,694 --> 00:34:34,530
...law would
"preserve biological sex as a distinct..."
670
00:34:34,530 --> 00:34:39,744
Transgenderism must be
eradicated from public life entirely.
671
00:34:46,751 --> 00:34:49,420
- Here's where I dropped the ball.
- Oh, okay.
672
00:34:49,420 --> 00:34:54,383
I obviously didn't anticipate
meeting the governor of Indiana.
673
00:34:54,383 --> 00:34:55,468
Oh, yeah.
674
00:34:55,468 --> 00:34:58,429
- And I... He asked what we were doing.
- Right.
675
00:34:58,429 --> 00:35:01,390
And we told him,
and he seemed... he seemed to---
676
00:35:01,390 --> 00:35:03,142
- Okay with that.
- Be, "Oh, great."
677
00:35:03,142 --> 00:35:06,521
And I... I wish I had
the wherewithal to go, like,
678
00:35:06,521 --> 00:35:09,232
"What's your stance on trans people?"
679
00:35:09,232 --> 00:35:10,191
Or "What's..."
680
00:35:10,191 --> 00:35:12,443
I actually didn't know
he was the governor,
681
00:35:12,443 --> 00:35:15,530
and then, later in the conversation,
someone said something--
682
00:35:15,530 --> 00:35:18,366
And I did. I heard, like,
"I want you to meet the governor."
683
00:35:18,366 --> 00:35:20,159
- Oh!
- And I'm like, "Oh."
684
00:35:20,159 --> 00:35:21,994
This must happen to you a lot.
685
00:35:22,578 --> 00:35:24,622
The photo you don't wanna be in.
686
00:35:24,622 --> 00:35:25,665
Yeah.
687
00:35:25,665 --> 00:35:27,917
- I don't get that very often.
- Right.
688
00:35:27,917 --> 00:35:32,004
And someone comes in, and there's
someone down there on the floor snapping.
689
00:35:32,004 --> 00:35:33,798
"This person's with Will Ferrell."
690
00:35:33,798 --> 00:35:36,509
But then I'm in this photo
with this governor,
691
00:35:36,509 --> 00:35:38,469
and I don't know his politics.
692
00:35:38,469 --> 00:35:40,346
- Right.
- And, uh, I mean...
693
00:35:40,346 --> 00:35:42,640
- That was the thing. That was...
- No--
694
00:35:42,640 --> 00:35:44,100
That was my negative take--
695
00:35:44,100 --> 00:35:46,561
That was the one place
where I was like, "I should've..."
696
00:35:46,561 --> 00:35:49,564
Just to see what he happened to say.
697
00:35:50,314 --> 00:35:51,149
Yeah.
698
00:35:51,774 --> 00:35:53,943
So walking into that arena...
699
00:35:53,943 --> 00:35:54,861
Yeah.
700
00:35:55,361 --> 00:35:57,155
- 20,000 people, right?
- Yeah.
701
00:35:57,155 --> 00:35:58,573
How did that feel?
702
00:35:59,699 --> 00:36:03,369
I know that all of this
is going to make it easier for me
703
00:36:03,369 --> 00:36:05,538
to walk into these kind of places later.
704
00:36:06,122 --> 00:36:07,456
I did it. It's done.
705
00:36:07,456 --> 00:36:11,335
I'm sort of looking for some of that
a little bit more on this trip.
706
00:36:11,335 --> 00:36:16,215
Like, I'm gonna have to peel off
a few times and just--
707
00:36:16,215 --> 00:36:18,551
- Sure.
- So I can feel what it feels like.
708
00:36:18,551 --> 00:36:19,635
By yourself, right?
709
00:36:19,635 --> 00:36:21,345
- Yeah, of course.
- Yeah.
710
00:36:28,060 --> 00:36:29,395
It's fascinating to me.
711
00:36:29,395 --> 00:36:32,565
There's so many trans people out here
all around the country,
712
00:36:32,565 --> 00:36:34,817
living their lives in these places.
713
00:36:34,817 --> 00:36:35,735
Yeah.
714
00:36:36,402 --> 00:36:37,737
To me,
715
00:36:37,737 --> 00:36:41,699
connecting with more people like that
would be something I would like to do.
716
00:36:43,075 --> 00:36:44,493
Oh, we're heading to Peoria.
717
00:36:44,493 --> 00:36:47,705
There's, uh, a woman there
we're gonna meet named Dana Garber,
718
00:36:47,705 --> 00:36:50,208
who, um, transitioned later in life,
719
00:36:50,708 --> 00:36:56,464
and she has been deeply involved
in the trans community in Peoria,
720
00:36:56,464 --> 00:36:57,882
which is fascinating to me
721
00:36:57,882 --> 00:36:59,508
because I did not know...
722
00:36:59,508 --> 00:37:00,426
Of course.
723
00:37:00,426 --> 00:37:01,969
...any trans people growing up.
724
00:37:01,969 --> 00:37:02,887
Yeah.
725
00:37:08,726 --> 00:37:11,145
Thanks for having us
in your city, in Peoria.
726
00:37:11,145 --> 00:37:12,313
Yeah.
727
00:37:12,313 --> 00:37:13,940
Are you from here originally?
728
00:37:13,940 --> 00:37:16,317
- Yeah, this is Pekin right here.
- Okay.
729
00:37:16,317 --> 00:37:18,110
And I've been here my whole life.
730
00:37:18,110 --> 00:37:19,028
- Oh wow.
- Yep.
731
00:37:19,862 --> 00:37:22,031
Did you transition like me?
732
00:37:22,031 --> 00:37:23,407
Ki-- I'm 61. So...
733
00:37:23,407 --> 00:37:25,368
- And I'm 65.
- Okay.
734
00:37:25,368 --> 00:37:29,205
I started... I came out to my family
when I was 55.
735
00:37:29,205 --> 00:37:30,873
Okay. Wow. Okay, so it's--
736
00:37:30,873 --> 00:37:32,875
- So very similar to Harper.
- Yeah.
737
00:37:32,875 --> 00:37:37,463
I know from my own experience,
but I'm gonna guess that was really tough.
738
00:37:38,089 --> 00:37:39,757
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
739
00:37:40,258 --> 00:37:43,928
Yes. So I knew a long time ago
that, you know,
740
00:37:44,679 --> 00:37:46,847
that I should have been a girl.
741
00:37:46,847 --> 00:37:48,849
On my first day of kindergarten,
742
00:37:50,101 --> 00:37:52,103
I walked in and I sat down with the girls.
743
00:37:52,103 --> 00:37:55,273
So the teacher's talking about
class rules, you know.
744
00:37:55,273 --> 00:37:57,608
- Yeah.
- So she took us to potty.
745
00:37:57,608 --> 00:37:59,068
And I got in the girls' line.
746
00:37:59,068 --> 00:38:01,570
She grabbed me by the hand
and said, "No, baby."
747
00:38:01,570 --> 00:38:04,156
"You gotta go in the boys' line.
You're a boy."
748
00:38:05,074 --> 00:38:07,285
And everybody started making fun of me.
749
00:38:07,285 --> 00:38:09,287
So I got, like, a panic attack,
750
00:38:09,287 --> 00:38:12,248
and I went in the bathroom,
threw up and everything.
751
00:38:12,248 --> 00:38:15,084
And the teacher came in there,
like, "Are you sick?"
752
00:38:15,084 --> 00:38:17,545
And she called my mom,
and my mom came and got me.
753
00:38:17,545 --> 00:38:21,340
And I... I told her what had happened.
And she said, "Honey, you're a boy."
754
00:38:21,340 --> 00:38:25,136
"You can't go in there with the girls.
You got different body parts and stuff."
755
00:38:25,136 --> 00:38:27,346
- And I didn't know that, you know?
- Right.
756
00:38:27,346 --> 00:38:29,098
It wasn't about body parts.
757
00:38:29,765 --> 00:38:32,059
You know,
it was about who I am in here, so...
758
00:38:32,059 --> 00:38:35,021
You know, it's like,
what was wrong with me, you know?
759
00:38:35,021 --> 00:38:39,191
I used to pray to Jesus
every night when I was in grade school,
760
00:38:39,191 --> 00:38:42,820
you know, fix me or kill me,
one or the other, you know?
761
00:38:42,820 --> 00:38:44,322
- It was horrible.
- Yeah.
762
00:38:44,322 --> 00:38:47,241
It was like,
"Why am I like this?" You know?
763
00:38:49,702 --> 00:38:54,749
Got in a really bad place mentally,
and I got pretty suicidal for a while.
764
00:38:54,749 --> 00:38:57,001
- Yeah.
- And I thought the only way...
765
00:38:57,501 --> 00:38:59,879
I thought,
"I don't really wanna die," you know,
766
00:38:59,879 --> 00:39:03,424
"but I don't
wanna go on like this either."
767
00:39:03,424 --> 00:39:05,843
So that's when I started counseling,
768
00:39:05,843 --> 00:39:09,138
and my counselor was really awesome.
769
00:39:09,138 --> 00:39:13,476
She's more like, "If you wanna do this,
then try it," you know?
770
00:39:14,143 --> 00:39:18,689
Because I wasn't living
my auth... authenticity, you know? So...
771
00:39:18,689 --> 00:39:19,607
Yeah.
772
00:39:19,607 --> 00:39:23,986
Um... Now, my experience was that I had a...
kind of not a good therapist.
773
00:39:23,986 --> 00:39:26,030
- You know how that works sometimes.
- Yeah.
774
00:39:26,030 --> 00:39:28,157
And, uh, much later,
775
00:39:28,157 --> 00:39:30,993
I got a... a better-- A gender therapist,
776
00:39:30,993 --> 00:39:32,536
and we kept talking.
777
00:39:32,536 --> 00:39:35,289
And it was still a year,
but once I got to...
778
00:39:35,289 --> 00:39:37,792
my est... my first estrogen pill...
779
00:39:37,792 --> 00:39:39,001
This is silly to me.
780
00:39:39,001 --> 00:39:40,544
I'm sure any person...
781
00:39:40,544 --> 00:39:42,838
But that first estrogen pill
is like, "Ta-da!"
782
00:39:42,838 --> 00:39:45,216
"Magic! Ah, this is
the most amazing feeling."
783
00:39:45,216 --> 00:39:47,426
- You're not feeling anything for months.
- Wow.
784
00:39:47,426 --> 00:39:50,429
But I just like...
mentally, I was just like... like,
785
00:39:50,429 --> 00:39:53,265
"Why did I wait so long?
I love this." You know?
786
00:39:53,265 --> 00:39:54,767
- Me too.
- Yeah.
787
00:39:57,353 --> 00:40:02,441
Have you faced hate
in this community at times, or--
788
00:40:02,441 --> 00:40:04,527
I think I've had a few incidents.
789
00:40:04,527 --> 00:40:07,321
My voice gets me misgendered a lot,
and I just--
790
00:40:07,321 --> 00:40:09,907
- I hate-- I hate the voice.
- You hate your voice.
791
00:40:09,907 --> 00:40:12,910
- I really do like passing.
- Yeah.
792
00:40:12,910 --> 00:40:17,081
And I would love to pass.
I just... The voice was killing me.
793
00:40:17,081 --> 00:40:22,169
I don't really want
this low, male voice, you know?
794
00:40:22,169 --> 00:40:24,713
I... I did that, too, for a while, you know.
795
00:40:24,713 --> 00:40:27,508
- I went to this vocal therapy course.
- Yeah.
796
00:40:27,508 --> 00:40:29,927
Sat down one night,
and I'm really thinking,
797
00:40:30,594 --> 00:40:33,639
was I doing this for me
or for society, you know?
798
00:40:33,639 --> 00:40:34,974
Wow, right, right.
799
00:40:34,974 --> 00:40:38,144
And I... No, I'm doing it
for everybody else but me.
800
00:40:38,144 --> 00:40:39,770
This is my voice, you know?
801
00:40:40,604 --> 00:40:45,109
A lot of transitioning
is learning to accept yourself, I think.
802
00:40:50,739 --> 00:40:52,408
Hey, I just wanna point out
803
00:40:52,408 --> 00:40:56,120
that this is... basically
the first time I've ever done this.
804
00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:58,873
- I can't sing.
- That doesn't matter!
805
00:41:01,876 --> 00:41:03,961
- I don't think it matters.
- Okay.
806
00:41:03,961 --> 00:41:06,380
- How about Sonny and Cher? How about--
- Whoo!
807
00:41:06,380 --> 00:41:09,133
You... you wanna take this?
808
00:41:09,133 --> 00:41:11,218
- I got this.
- You got the first line.
809
00:41:11,218 --> 00:41:14,513
♪ They say we're young
And we don't know ♪
810
00:41:14,513 --> 00:41:15,514
Whoo!
811
00:41:15,514 --> 00:41:19,059
- ♪ We won't find out until we grow ♪
- ♪ Grow ♪
812
00:41:19,059 --> 00:41:21,103
Yeah! Whoo-whoo-whoo!
813
00:41:21,103 --> 00:41:24,773
- ♪ I don't know... all true ♪
- ♪ Well, I don't know if it's all true ♪
814
00:41:24,773 --> 00:41:25,941
♪ 'Cause I got you ♪
815
00:41:25,941 --> 00:41:28,360
- ♪ And, baby, I got you ♪
- ♪ I got you ♪
816
00:41:28,360 --> 00:41:29,612
Whoo!
817
00:41:30,613 --> 00:41:31,489
♪ Babe ♪
818
00:41:33,449 --> 00:41:34,992
♪ I got you, babe ♪
819
00:41:34,992 --> 00:41:36,702
- Yeah!
- Whoo!
820
00:41:36,702 --> 00:41:38,245
♪ I got you, babe ♪
821
00:41:39,788 --> 00:41:43,167
♪ They say our love
Won't pay the rent ♪
822
00:41:43,751 --> 00:41:47,713
♪ Before it's earned
Our money's all been spent... ♪
823
00:41:47,713 --> 00:41:50,633
- That singing last night.
- On the mic, you were good.
824
00:41:50,633 --> 00:41:52,885
Oh, no, I can take hold of a mic.
825
00:41:52,885 --> 00:41:56,722
- But I've never seen you that way before.
- It was amazing for me.
826
00:41:57,848 --> 00:42:00,267
Do you think we need... This could be fun.
827
00:42:00,267 --> 00:42:01,310
Yeah, okay.
828
00:42:03,395 --> 00:42:05,856
...like, a theme song for this road trip?
829
00:42:05,856 --> 00:42:06,815
Oh!
830
00:42:07,316 --> 00:42:10,027
- We could call someone.
- Who are you thinking?
831
00:42:10,945 --> 00:42:12,404
Fred Armisen comes to mind, right?
832
00:42:12,404 --> 00:42:13,447
- Fred.
- Fred.
833
00:42:19,703 --> 00:42:22,581
Let me think who else that we know
that writes good songs.
834
00:42:22,581 --> 00:42:25,334
- Uh, uh, Forte?
- Oh yeah, Will Forte.
835
00:42:25,334 --> 00:42:30,631
♪ Have you ever had a Mexican location
Sitting right on your face? ♪
836
00:42:31,340 --> 00:42:33,592
- Incredibly musical. Very--
- Of course, yeah.
837
00:42:33,592 --> 00:42:35,344
- Molly.
- Molly Shannon.
838
00:42:35,344 --> 00:42:38,222
♪ Isn't it romantic? Well! ♪
839
00:42:38,222 --> 00:42:40,224
- What about Wiig?
- Kristen Wiig.
840
00:42:40,224 --> 00:42:46,230
♪ ...party with the best of them ♪
841
00:42:46,230 --> 00:42:49,441
♪ And I'm gonna go down to the river ♪
842
00:42:49,441 --> 00:42:50,651
Okay, calling Wiig.
843
00:42:51,235 --> 00:42:53,862
Uh-huh.
844
00:42:55,281 --> 00:42:56,115
W--
845
00:42:56,115 --> 00:43:00,119
- Hi, Wiig.
- Hello, Kristen.
846
00:43:00,119 --> 00:43:02,329
- Hi! Oh my gosh!
- Hi.
847
00:43:02,329 --> 00:43:04,081
Look at you, guys. What's up?
848
00:43:04,665 --> 00:43:07,626
We... we're trying to think of a theme song.
849
00:43:07,626 --> 00:43:09,336
- Oh, okay.
- So...
850
00:43:09,336 --> 00:43:12,089
And we thought you're one of our friends,
851
00:43:12,089 --> 00:43:14,925
who's so talented in so many ways,
852
00:43:14,925 --> 00:43:18,596
that you would be able
to come up with a theme song.
853
00:43:18,596 --> 00:43:20,306
I-- Yes. Do you just--
854
00:43:20,306 --> 00:43:22,057
We want it to be sort of...
855
00:43:22,725 --> 00:43:25,477
- Oh, no, we've thought about it.
- Fun friends on the road?
856
00:43:25,477 --> 00:43:27,980
- Friends on the road, for sure.
- Friends on the road.
857
00:43:27,980 --> 00:43:29,982
Harper and Will and stuff like that.
858
00:43:29,982 --> 00:43:31,775
I want it to be kind of jazzy.
859
00:43:31,775 --> 00:43:33,235
- I want it to be jazzy.
- Oh.
860
00:43:33,235 --> 00:43:35,112
- With an up tempo.
- Yeah.
861
00:43:35,112 --> 00:43:37,323
- But not too up.
- No. And it also needs a little--
862
00:43:37,323 --> 00:43:39,033
- Let me write this down.
- Yeah.
863
00:43:39,033 --> 00:43:42,286
But then it's gotta stop you
in your tracks and make you think.
864
00:43:42,286 --> 00:43:44,288
- Very sad.
- Maybe bring a tear to your eye.
865
00:43:44,288 --> 00:43:47,291
Yeah, it should bring a tear
to your eye too. Yeah, do that.
866
00:43:47,291 --> 00:43:50,669
And a little twang like some country
'cause we're in the middle of the country.
867
00:43:50,669 --> 00:43:53,255
- So up-tempo jazz.
- Jazzy.
868
00:43:53,255 --> 00:43:54,381
- Jazz.
- Fun.
869
00:43:54,381 --> 00:43:56,925
- Fun, but it's gotta make you cry.
- You gotta cry.
870
00:43:56,925 --> 00:43:58,552
Yeah, you gotta cry.
871
00:43:58,552 --> 00:44:00,763
- Tear to your eye, fun.
- Jazzy.
872
00:44:00,763 --> 00:44:02,848
- Jazzy. Don't forget jazzy.
- With a little country.
873
00:44:02,848 --> 00:44:04,183
With a little country.
874
00:44:04,183 --> 00:44:06,852
- Yeah, please don't forget jazzy.
- Okay.
875
00:44:07,436 --> 00:44:09,021
- Uh, thank you so much.
- Love you.
876
00:44:09,021 --> 00:44:10,606
It's good to see you. I'm gonna--
877
00:44:10,606 --> 00:44:12,941
- Yeah, I mean, just take your time.
- Yeah.
878
00:44:12,941 --> 00:44:15,486
But anytime in the next couple days
or something, I don't know.
879
00:44:15,486 --> 00:44:17,154
- Oh, okay.
- Yeah.
880
00:44:17,738 --> 00:44:18,739
- Bye, guys.
- Bye, buddy.
881
00:44:18,739 --> 00:44:19,740
- Bye.
- Bye.
882
00:44:20,949 --> 00:44:22,284
I think she got it.
883
00:44:22,284 --> 00:44:24,912
- Yeah, that's good. Yeah.
- Yeah. Yup.
884
00:44:25,788 --> 00:44:27,831
♪ I'm going up the country ♪
885
00:44:27,831 --> 00:44:30,459
♪ Baby, don't you wanna go? ♪
886
00:44:31,794 --> 00:44:33,587
{\an8}♪ I'm going up the country ♪
887
00:44:33,587 --> 00:44:36,298
♪ Baby, don't you wanna go? ♪
888
00:44:37,591 --> 00:44:42,346
♪ I'm going to some place
Where I've never been before ♪
889
00:44:43,305 --> 00:44:46,308
♪ I'm going, I'm going
Where the water tastes... ♪
890
00:44:46,308 --> 00:44:47,810
Here's a question.
891
00:44:47,810 --> 00:44:50,854
Do you think
you're a worse driver as a female driver?
892
00:44:53,691 --> 00:44:55,609
- That's the dumbest-- that's so--
- Whoo!
893
00:44:55,609 --> 00:44:58,612
- No. No, no. That is so-- Oh, fuck you.
- Whoo!
894
00:44:58,612 --> 00:45:00,114
- Zing! Whoo!
- But I am.
895
00:45:00,114 --> 00:45:01,073
- Yeah.
- Oh.
896
00:45:03,575 --> 00:45:04,952
- Hey.
- How's it going today?
897
00:45:04,952 --> 00:45:08,622
Do you recognize this guy?
He's a-- This is a Hollywood movie star.
898
00:45:08,622 --> 00:45:09,915
Huh? No.
899
00:45:09,915 --> 00:45:13,377
- Don't you recognize him? He's in movies.
- That's okay. Roll up the window.
900
00:45:20,342 --> 00:45:22,678
Oh shit. This is my sister.
I better get this one.
901
00:45:22,678 --> 00:45:23,595
Okay.
902
00:45:24,596 --> 00:45:25,931
Uh, hi, Eleanor.
903
00:45:27,474 --> 00:45:30,853
I'm gonna put you on speaker
so Will can ask you some questions.
904
00:45:30,853 --> 00:45:33,355
- Okay.
- Eleanor, I don't wanna impose.
905
00:45:33,355 --> 00:45:36,859
- Are you sure it's okay if I stay?
- Oh my God, of course it's okay.
906
00:45:36,859 --> 00:45:40,571
Do you have... do you have
a humidifier set up in my room?
907
00:45:40,571 --> 00:45:44,074
- I would-- Don't listen to your sister.
- No, don't indulge--
908
00:45:44,074 --> 00:45:45,868
- Don't indulge him.
- Oh!
909
00:45:45,868 --> 00:45:47,745
Will's sleeping
on the couch for that.
910
00:45:47,745 --> 00:45:49,997
What products do you have
in your guest bathroom?
911
00:45:49,997 --> 00:45:50,914
Stop!
912
00:45:51,415 --> 00:45:54,626
Tell Will I'll put
my Chanel face cream down there.
913
00:45:54,626 --> 00:45:56,170
- Oh.
- Thank you. Yes.
914
00:45:58,756 --> 00:46:01,091
- I'm feeling it.
- I can tell.
915
00:46:01,091 --> 00:46:04,928
I'm getting closer to Iowa City,
and I am feeling it.
916
00:46:05,554 --> 00:46:07,806
This is the home turf.
You're excited.
917
00:46:13,020 --> 00:46:14,396
Oh my goodness.
918
00:46:14,396 --> 00:46:16,190
Fantastic. I love it.
919
00:46:23,071 --> 00:46:24,740
- Hi.
- Hello.
920
00:46:25,949 --> 00:46:27,826
Huh?
921
00:46:28,577 --> 00:46:31,371
- Good to see you.
- This is my friend Will Ferrell.
922
00:46:31,371 --> 00:46:32,998
- Hi, Will.
- How are you?
923
00:46:33,499 --> 00:46:35,501
Oh, should this be a housewarming gift?
924
00:46:36,001 --> 00:46:37,878
Oh, thank you.
925
00:46:39,046 --> 00:46:41,381
- Do you like Pringles?
- I love Pringles.
926
00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:44,635
All right, just around the corner.
927
00:46:44,635 --> 00:46:47,095
Okay.
Bathroom in there, by the way.
928
00:46:47,971 --> 00:46:49,932
- Thank you. This is great.
- Yeah.
929
00:46:50,432 --> 00:46:53,769
Eleanor, what was your reaction
when you got the news?
930
00:46:53,769 --> 00:46:55,187
I was totally surprised.
931
00:46:55,687 --> 00:46:56,522
Um...
932
00:46:57,272 --> 00:47:02,194
And I think my reaction was... sorrow.
933
00:47:02,694 --> 00:47:03,779
Uh-huh.
934
00:47:03,779 --> 00:47:05,864
And the reason I felt sorrow
935
00:47:05,864 --> 00:47:11,870
was I thought about how much pain
Harper must have suffered over the years.
936
00:47:12,579 --> 00:47:15,123
And also knowing, like, immediately
937
00:47:15,123 --> 00:47:18,126
how stressful that moment was
of coming out.
938
00:47:18,877 --> 00:47:23,465
And so the most important thing to me
was not to be so careful in my response
939
00:47:23,465 --> 00:47:24,967
but to respond quickly.
940
00:47:24,967 --> 00:47:25,884
You did.
941
00:47:25,884 --> 00:47:29,388
So she knew
it's not something I need to think about.
942
00:47:29,388 --> 00:47:31,598
- I'll talk to you more later.
- Yeah.
943
00:47:31,598 --> 00:47:35,978
I think what you said,
which was so... heartening...
944
00:47:35,978 --> 00:47:39,064
...was, "Oh good.
I've always wanted a sister."
945
00:47:39,565 --> 00:47:41,775
- I did say that, yeah.
- That's what you said.
946
00:47:41,775 --> 00:47:43,193
Pow. Just like that.
947
00:47:43,777 --> 00:47:47,739
I was gonna tell a funny story,
though, because I always think of this.
948
00:47:47,739 --> 00:47:49,992
I think it was around eighth grade.
949
00:47:50,492 --> 00:47:55,455
Eleanor gave me a pair of her bell-bottoms
that she didn't want anymore,
950
00:47:55,455 --> 00:47:58,292
and they were white, frilly bell-bottoms.
951
00:47:58,792 --> 00:48:02,462
And once I got 'em,
they were my favorite article of clothing.
952
00:48:02,462 --> 00:48:04,339
I wore them all around. I loved them.
953
00:48:04,339 --> 00:48:07,885
And I went to the skate park
with my skate friends.
954
00:48:07,885 --> 00:48:08,886
- Yeah.
- Uh...
955
00:48:08,886 --> 00:48:12,472
And we skated around that night,
and I was feeling good in my white--
956
00:48:12,472 --> 00:48:14,683
- In your white bell-bottoms.
- My bell-bottoms.
957
00:48:14,683 --> 00:48:18,770
And, uh, I come out of that skate park,
and it's like, uh...
958
00:48:19,855 --> 00:48:23,066
"Hey, we gotta come back next week.
They're doing it again next week."
959
00:48:23,066 --> 00:48:26,612
And someone goes,
"Yeah, but don't bring those faggy pants."
960
00:48:26,612 --> 00:48:27,529
Oh.
961
00:48:27,529 --> 00:48:31,408
And, uh, the pants disappeared
right at that moment.
962
00:48:31,408 --> 00:48:34,286
There's no part of you that was like,
"Shut up. These pants are cool."
963
00:48:34,286 --> 00:48:38,290
So many times in my life, some,
probably, effort for Harper to get out
964
00:48:38,290 --> 00:48:39,708
was just squashed.
965
00:48:39,708 --> 00:48:41,460
- Yeah.
- Over and over again.
966
00:48:41,460 --> 00:48:45,088
And I just remember that one
kind of clearly. So...
967
00:48:45,631 --> 00:48:48,300
Uh, Eleanor,
you haven't touched your Pringles.
968
00:48:48,300 --> 00:48:51,219
- Sour cream and onion.
- Oh, I totally forgot.
969
00:48:51,219 --> 00:48:54,389
Are you familiar with their Scorched line?
970
00:48:54,389 --> 00:48:55,766
- I'm not.
- Yeah.
971
00:48:55,766 --> 00:48:58,101
- That might be too much for me, yeah.
- I think so.
972
00:48:58,101 --> 00:48:59,853
- Oh, why thank you.
- Mm.
973
00:48:59,853 --> 00:49:01,355
- Oh, a little taste of--
- Oh.
974
00:49:01,355 --> 00:49:02,773
Oh. Don't-- Oh!
975
00:49:02,773 --> 00:49:03,690
Mm.
976
00:49:04,191 --> 00:49:06,693
And where did these come from?
977
00:49:08,111 --> 00:49:10,614
We got them at a Walmart.
It was in Indianapolis.
978
00:49:10,614 --> 00:49:13,450
They taste different.
You can tell they're from Indiana.
979
00:49:13,450 --> 00:49:17,412
Oh yeah, definitely.
980
00:49:17,412 --> 00:49:20,582
♪ I wanna hold the hand inside... ♪
981
00:49:20,582 --> 00:49:22,834
See what we got here. That's...
982
00:49:22,834 --> 00:49:25,045
Think my mother collected all those.
983
00:49:25,629 --> 00:49:26,588
Wow.
984
00:49:26,588 --> 00:49:29,591
♪ I wanna take a breath and... ♪
985
00:49:29,591 --> 00:49:31,843
These are little school photos of
986
00:49:32,344 --> 00:49:35,222
cute Harper Steele when she was confused.
987
00:49:35,222 --> 00:49:37,766
And this is probably around the age
988
00:49:37,766 --> 00:49:39,977
where I started to feel
just kind of weird.
989
00:49:39,977 --> 00:49:40,894
Yeah.
990
00:49:40,894 --> 00:49:44,523
And, uh...
you just start to think to yourself
991
00:49:44,523 --> 00:49:47,192
that, uh, everyone feels the same way.
992
00:49:47,192 --> 00:49:48,819
So you're just kind of quiet...
993
00:49:48,819 --> 00:49:52,739
...about the whole deal.
It's like, "We all feel that way, right?"
994
00:49:54,574 --> 00:49:57,661
Every time I see
a picture like this of me...
995
00:49:58,829 --> 00:50:02,082
I mean, here I am in the newspaper.
I used to ride a unicycle.
996
00:50:02,582 --> 00:50:06,169
I... I rode all over town,
Iowa City, on... on the unicycle.
997
00:50:07,170 --> 00:50:09,381
I love this photo. This is, uh...
998
00:50:10,257 --> 00:50:12,884
Whenever I see myself
as a little girl.
999
00:50:13,927 --> 00:50:15,971
I swear to God, I love this photo.
1000
00:50:17,931 --> 00:50:18,765
Yeah.
1001
00:50:20,058 --> 00:50:21,393
Darn it.
1002
00:50:21,393 --> 00:50:26,189
♪ Fade into you ♪
1003
00:50:30,569 --> 00:50:35,365
♪ Strange you never knew... ♪
1004
00:50:36,074 --> 00:50:37,409
Yeah, this is it.
1005
00:50:38,493 --> 00:50:40,370
This is the house that I grew up in.
1006
00:50:43,331 --> 00:50:46,501
I used to skateboard. Did all
my early skateboarding tricks out here.
1007
00:50:46,501 --> 00:50:49,588
- I used to do my pole-vaulting this side.
- Down this, like...
1008
00:50:49,588 --> 00:50:52,591
Yeah, we had this--
I had-- My mother built a little--
1009
00:50:53,091 --> 00:50:55,677
Uh, she helped me build
a pole-vaulting mat
1010
00:50:55,677 --> 00:50:58,055
out of a bunch of potato sacks and--
1011
00:50:58,055 --> 00:50:59,848
- So you'd run down that way.
- Yeah. Choo.
1012
00:50:59,848 --> 00:51:02,517
And then--
But in the backyard was where...
1013
00:51:02,517 --> 00:51:04,269
- The puck was. Yeah.
- Okay.
1014
00:51:04,269 --> 00:51:08,273
And I'd smack it, and I'd--
You know, seven feet.
1015
00:51:08,273 --> 00:51:10,484
What was I gonna do all summer,
play with other people?
1016
00:51:10,484 --> 00:51:12,152
No, I pole-vaulted.
1017
00:51:16,531 --> 00:51:19,785
I came home from City High one day,
and I was just kinda bored.
1018
00:51:19,785 --> 00:51:22,496
So I started acting like I was drunk
on the way home.
1019
00:51:22,496 --> 00:51:24,247
And-- Oh, I could ride that.
1020
00:51:25,040 --> 00:51:25,874
Hey, can I ride that?
1021
00:51:26,541 --> 00:51:28,877
Do you mind if she borrows your unicycle
just for a second?
1022
00:51:28,877 --> 00:51:29,795
What?
1023
00:51:29,795 --> 00:51:32,047
Could she just ride your unicycle
for a second?
1024
00:51:32,047 --> 00:51:32,964
Why?
1025
00:51:32,964 --> 00:51:35,050
- She knows how to ride one.
- Sure.
1026
00:51:35,050 --> 00:51:36,468
- Yeah, thanks.
- Oh, that's awesome.
1027
00:51:36,468 --> 00:51:38,261
I'm in heels,
so it might be a little hard.
1028
00:51:38,845 --> 00:51:40,764
- What's your name?
- My name's Quinn. Yours?
1029
00:51:40,764 --> 00:51:42,265
- That's Will Ferrell.
- Cool.
1030
00:51:42,265 --> 00:51:45,143
I like to have this up here,
so when I fall, it's gonna be good.
1031
00:51:45,143 --> 00:51:47,813
She was bragging
about being able to ride a unicycle.
1032
00:51:48,438 --> 00:51:50,315
Is that your mode of transportation,
pretty much?
1033
00:51:50,315 --> 00:51:52,651
This was my mode of transportation
in junior high.
1034
00:51:52,651 --> 00:51:54,319
- Give me a second.
- Yeah.
1035
00:51:54,319 --> 00:51:56,488
- I'll stand--
- It's been many years, okay?
1036
00:51:56,488 --> 00:51:58,281
- All right.
- Once you're on though...
1037
00:51:58,281 --> 00:52:00,117
- Whoa!
- Once you're on.
1038
00:52:00,117 --> 00:52:01,701
There we go.
1039
00:52:01,701 --> 00:52:03,495
Here we go. Oh boy.
1040
00:52:04,121 --> 00:52:04,996
Oh my God.
1041
00:52:05,622 --> 00:52:07,165
No, no, no.
1042
00:52:07,165 --> 00:52:10,210
It's so... it's so unstable.
1043
00:52:13,463 --> 00:52:15,549
I spent so many long--
I lived on this thing for years.
1044
00:52:15,549 --> 00:52:19,344
- ♪ La-di-da, on Sunday afternoon ♪
- Okay, good. Here we go. Goddamn.
1045
00:52:19,344 --> 00:52:21,138
- ♪ In Iowa City ♪
- Okay, there we go.
1046
00:52:21,138 --> 00:52:23,849
- Hey, Harper. Good to see you.
- Hey, Will. How you doing?
1047
00:52:23,849 --> 00:52:25,142
Bye.
1048
00:52:25,767 --> 00:52:27,394
Whoa.
1049
00:52:28,770 --> 00:52:30,981
- Oh!
- Thanks for letting us borrow.
1050
00:52:31,648 --> 00:52:34,234
Yeah. Well, have a good day.
1051
00:52:34,234 --> 00:52:36,528
- Thank you so much.
- You're welcome.
1052
00:52:36,528 --> 00:52:38,196
- Anyway--
- I'm blown away.
1053
00:52:38,196 --> 00:52:39,906
- That's what I did.
- Wow.
1054
00:52:39,906 --> 00:52:42,492
I'd go to junior high
like that every day for two years.
1055
00:52:43,910 --> 00:52:45,412
- Man, that's weird.
- I know.
1056
00:52:45,412 --> 00:52:47,998
Very weird.
1057
00:52:47,998 --> 00:52:50,709
- Well, thanks, Eleanor.
- All right.
1058
00:52:50,709 --> 00:52:53,170
- You're good on Pringles, right?
- I still have some.
1059
00:52:53,170 --> 00:52:54,880
- Okay.
- Yeah. Thank you though.
1060
00:52:54,880 --> 00:52:56,381
- All right.
- I enjoyed 'em.
1061
00:52:57,132 --> 00:52:59,134
♪ "Come in," she said, "I'll give ya" ♪
1062
00:52:59,634 --> 00:53:01,636
♪ "Shelter from the storm..." ♪
1063
00:53:02,137 --> 00:53:02,971
Look at it.
1064
00:53:02,971 --> 00:53:04,598
- Look at the snow!
- I know.
1065
00:53:04,598 --> 00:53:06,766
Does this technically count as a blizzard?
1066
00:53:06,766 --> 00:53:08,852
- No, this is nothing like a blizzard.
- Okay.
1067
00:53:08,852 --> 00:53:10,562
No, no, this is light snow.
1068
00:53:10,562 --> 00:53:13,940
- These flakes seem big.
- No, this is a light flurry.
1069
00:53:13,940 --> 00:53:15,650
♪ If I pass this way again ♪
1070
00:53:16,151 --> 00:53:17,986
♪ You can rest assured ♪
1071
00:53:17,986 --> 00:53:19,196
♪ I'll always do... ♪
1072
00:53:19,196 --> 00:53:20,906
- Oh.
- It is a blizzard.
1073
00:53:20,906 --> 00:53:23,366
It's beginning to look
a little less like a flurry.
1074
00:53:23,366 --> 00:53:25,869
- Maybe I'll give you that.
- See, I called it.
1075
00:53:26,912 --> 00:53:28,830
♪ "Come in," she said, "I'll give ya" ♪
1076
00:53:29,331 --> 00:53:31,208
♪ "Shelter from the storm" ♪
1077
00:53:38,506 --> 00:53:40,759
So I was so curious.
1078
00:53:41,760 --> 00:53:45,847
Just... I don't know, I just thought--
I... I... I never asked you, like...
1079
00:53:47,390 --> 00:53:48,350
Okay, go.
1080
00:53:48,850 --> 00:53:50,310
- Go.
- How... how are your boobs?
1081
00:53:50,810 --> 00:53:52,187
- As if--
- Now you got boobs.
1082
00:53:52,687 --> 00:53:53,813
I love my boobs.
1083
00:53:54,397 --> 00:53:58,276
When you woke up from that s-- Was it--
1084
00:53:59,110 --> 00:54:00,779
I like to think it was like...
1085
00:54:03,198 --> 00:54:05,951
Was it just like the heavens
were sing... in a way?
1086
00:54:05,951 --> 00:54:09,329
I joke that I did puberty
in about four hours.
1087
00:54:10,330 --> 00:54:13,291
But... as soon as I woke up,
1088
00:54:14,751 --> 00:54:15,669
I was like,
1089
00:54:17,504 --> 00:54:18,463
"This is amazing."
1090
00:54:18,463 --> 00:54:19,381
Yeah.
1091
00:54:19,381 --> 00:54:23,718
Every time I've done something that's
made me feel better in my own body--
1092
00:54:23,718 --> 00:54:25,095
- Yeah.
- For myself--
1093
00:54:25,095 --> 00:54:27,973
- It's amazing.
- There's-- It... it... it... it's been...
1094
00:54:28,848 --> 00:54:31,559
- Exhilarating. Yeah.
- Yeah. Guns a-blazing.
1095
00:54:31,559 --> 00:54:34,020
- Yup. That's great.
- So...
1096
00:54:34,020 --> 00:54:37,357
- So that was my experience with the boobs.
- Okay. What-- Okay.
1097
00:54:37,357 --> 00:54:38,858
So this... this is a big one,
1098
00:54:38,858 --> 00:54:41,820
but... but maybe, you know,
maybe we save this for later.
1099
00:54:41,820 --> 00:54:43,363
You are a friend of mine.
1100
00:54:43,363 --> 00:54:46,324
I invite any friend of mine
to ask me these questions.
1101
00:54:46,324 --> 00:54:48,326
I am not afraid to talk about it.
1102
00:54:48,326 --> 00:54:53,290
Do you foresee wanting to have
other physical augmentation?
1103
00:54:55,917 --> 00:54:57,627
- Possibly.
- In the future.
1104
00:54:57,627 --> 00:55:00,880
When I first started
thinking about transitioning,
1105
00:55:00,880 --> 00:55:02,674
in terms of bottom surgery,
1106
00:55:02,674 --> 00:55:04,801
I was like, "Well, I'm 61."
1107
00:55:06,136 --> 00:55:07,721
"I'm not gonna be a--"
1108
00:55:07,721 --> 00:55:12,350
"I'm not out there
with a super active sexual life, really."
1109
00:55:12,350 --> 00:55:13,310
Yeah.
1110
00:55:13,310 --> 00:55:16,104
- But there's also the dysphoric side.
- Yeah.
1111
00:55:16,104 --> 00:55:21,484
Looking in a mirror and seeing something
that doesn't fit with how I feel.
1112
00:55:21,484 --> 00:55:22,485
- So...
- Yeah.
1113
00:55:22,485 --> 00:55:23,903
- I don't know.
- Yeah.
1114
00:55:23,903 --> 00:55:25,905
- That's a tough one to answer.
- Right.
1115
00:55:25,905 --> 00:55:29,492
But, uh... Was there
any more boob questions you needed?
1116
00:55:29,492 --> 00:55:32,287
- No, but I did wanna ask, however--
- Okay.
1117
00:55:32,287 --> 00:55:34,164
Have you been to the--
1118
00:55:34,164 --> 00:55:37,876
have you been in Nordstrom's Rack
since you've gotten your own rack?
1119
00:55:37,876 --> 00:55:40,253
- Very good. Very-- Very good.
- Ha-ha!
1120
00:55:40,253 --> 00:55:42,714
And Will Ferrell wins
the Best Joke of the Year award.
1121
00:55:42,714 --> 00:55:46,718
Thank you. I knew as soon as I said it,
I got Best Joke of the Year.
1122
00:55:46,718 --> 00:55:49,262
I hate analyzing comedy
because it kinda ruins it.
1123
00:55:49,262 --> 00:55:51,306
- In this case, it won't.
- You gotta break it down.
1124
00:55:51,306 --> 00:55:53,141
- You do--
- You gotta.
1125
00:55:53,141 --> 00:55:56,895
-"Harper, What exactly did he do there?"
- But let me explain how he got there.
1126
00:55:56,895 --> 00:55:58,605
Will started with,
1127
00:55:58,605 --> 00:56:01,316
"When you got your new rack."
1128
00:56:01,316 --> 00:56:03,360
The connection is, "Did you go..."
1129
00:56:03,360 --> 00:56:04,861
"...to Nordstrom?"
1130
00:56:04,861 --> 00:56:06,529
Ah!
1131
00:56:06,529 --> 00:56:08,782
- God. Wow.
- And the two racks, different racks.
1132
00:56:08,782 --> 00:56:11,159
One of them's different,
but they're the same rack.
1133
00:56:11,159 --> 00:56:12,535
- Wow.
- Yeah.
1134
00:56:20,126 --> 00:56:22,796
- Thank you.
- Seen any famous people today?
1135
00:56:22,796 --> 00:56:23,880
- No.
- Okay.
1136
00:56:23,880 --> 00:56:25,673
Just you.
1137
00:56:25,673 --> 00:56:27,967
- Yeah! Whoo!
- Yeah!
1138
00:56:30,178 --> 00:56:32,472
- Fireworks...
- Fireworks world!
1139
00:56:32,472 --> 00:56:34,808
- This is gigantic.
- Oh my God.
1140
00:56:37,685 --> 00:56:41,815
- Holy Nishiki!
- I want something dangerous.
1141
00:56:41,815 --> 00:56:43,233
Ooh, Gator Gun.
1142
00:56:43,233 --> 00:56:45,944
Yeah, that's it.
Honey Badger. It's the Honey Badger.
1143
00:56:45,944 --> 00:56:46,945
- Set it down.
- Yep.
1144
00:56:46,945 --> 00:56:49,155
Pull the fuse,
or pull the sticker off the fuse.
1145
00:56:49,155 --> 00:56:51,449
- You're gonna light that, then run away.
- Light, and book.
1146
00:56:54,327 --> 00:56:56,287
How many clean undies do you have left?
1147
00:56:56,788 --> 00:56:58,832
I'm getting down to the...
1148
00:56:58,832 --> 00:57:00,333
- Nitty-gritty?
- Yup, yup.
1149
00:57:21,980 --> 00:57:25,775
So...
we're heading to Meeker, Oklahoma.
1150
00:57:25,775 --> 00:57:26,734
Uh-huh.
1151
00:57:27,485 --> 00:57:30,864
And this is in the category
of places you would have visited
1152
00:57:30,864 --> 00:57:32,407
and not thought twice about.
1153
00:57:32,407 --> 00:57:34,826
And so what are you feeling?
What are you thinking?
1154
00:57:35,326 --> 00:57:37,954
I'm nervous and anxious, like...
1155
00:57:40,165 --> 00:57:41,666
You know I love these kind of places.
1156
00:57:41,666 --> 00:57:46,463
You know that I spent my life
driving back and forth across the country,
1157
00:57:46,463 --> 00:57:48,256
going to little towns like this,
1158
00:57:48,256 --> 00:57:50,967
stopping in bars,
drinking, meeting people.
1159
00:57:50,967 --> 00:57:53,761
But I just don't know if I can anymore.
1160
00:58:01,352 --> 00:58:02,187
Okay.
1161
00:58:03,271 --> 00:58:07,275
So you-- You're gonna call me
if... if it's feeling dicey.
1162
00:58:07,275 --> 00:58:08,443
I'm gonna-- You know what?
1163
00:58:08,443 --> 00:58:11,154
- I'm gonna put it on speed dial.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1164
00:58:11,154 --> 00:58:13,198
- And you come running in.
- Yep.
1165
00:58:13,198 --> 00:58:14,991
With that mug of yours.
1166
00:58:15,783 --> 00:58:18,328
- I could go in with you right now.
- No.
1167
00:58:18,328 --> 00:58:22,081
I would feel better if that were the case,
but I just wanna try this thing.
1168
00:58:22,081 --> 00:58:25,543
I'm not gonna have an exper--
I won't be able to try this on my own.
1169
00:58:25,543 --> 00:58:27,420
- I might as well try it now.
- Yeah.
1170
00:58:29,964 --> 00:58:30,798
Oh...
1171
00:59:12,340 --> 00:59:14,133
- How you doing?
- Doin' well.
1172
00:59:14,133 --> 00:59:15,927
- How you doing?
- I'm doing good.
1173
00:59:16,594 --> 00:59:17,720
What's your name?
1174
00:59:17,720 --> 00:59:18,638
Dominique.
1175
00:59:18,638 --> 00:59:21,891
- Dominique. Harper Steele.
- Harper Steele.
1176
00:59:21,891 --> 00:59:23,184
What's going on?
1177
00:59:23,184 --> 00:59:24,435
Who are you?
1178
00:59:24,435 --> 00:59:26,563
My name's Harper. Who are you?
1179
00:59:26,563 --> 00:59:27,689
I'm Mama T.
1180
00:59:28,565 --> 00:59:29,440
You're Mama T?
1181
00:59:29,440 --> 00:59:31,985
- Oh yeah.
- All right. I heard about you.
1182
00:59:31,985 --> 00:59:33,111
Yeah.
1183
00:59:33,111 --> 00:59:35,989
I haven't heard about her.
Sorry about that.
1184
00:59:35,989 --> 00:59:38,199
- We's just messin' with you.
- Okay.
1185
00:59:38,992 --> 00:59:40,243
Y'all from Oklahoma?
1186
00:59:41,119 --> 00:59:43,079
No, no, no it's all right. I've been--
1187
00:59:43,079 --> 00:59:47,292
That's why I came in here.
I've been in a lot of bars in my life, so...
1188
00:59:47,875 --> 00:59:50,878
Trying to feel like if I can go back
to bars since I transitioned.
1189
00:59:50,878 --> 00:59:52,297
- That's the problem.
- Yeah.
1190
00:59:55,425 --> 00:59:57,135
Whoa.
1191
00:59:59,262 --> 01:00:03,725
- Oklahoma, thank you. Oh, thank you.
- Harper, where you from?
1192
01:00:03,725 --> 01:00:06,769
- I'm from, uh, Iowa.
- Iowa!
1193
01:00:06,769 --> 01:00:10,064
Yeah, Iowa, but I live in New York now.
1194
01:00:10,064 --> 01:00:13,234
- You're on the East Coast.
- I'm on the East Coast. Yeah.
1195
01:00:13,234 --> 01:00:15,445
How's that going for you guys?
1196
01:00:16,237 --> 01:00:17,405
Or gals.
1197
01:00:17,405 --> 01:00:18,865
I... I-- Thank you.
1198
01:00:18,865 --> 01:00:23,578
I like... I like, uh, Iowa more,
but I can't make any money there.
1199
01:00:23,578 --> 01:00:25,288
- So...
- Oh really?
1200
01:00:25,288 --> 01:00:27,123
Yeah, I write for TV.
1201
01:00:28,333 --> 01:00:31,794
I'm gonna text my friend.
He's parking the car out there.
1202
01:00:32,962 --> 01:00:34,297
- Hello?
- Hey.
1203
01:00:34,297 --> 01:00:35,214
Hey.
1204
01:00:35,798 --> 01:00:37,008
- Come on in.
- Okay.
1205
01:00:39,385 --> 01:00:41,137
Hey. Hi.
1206
01:00:41,137 --> 01:00:43,556
I want you to meet these guys.
These are my friends.
1207
01:00:43,556 --> 01:00:46,434
- Is this Will Ferrell?
- Yes, it is.
1208
01:00:46,434 --> 01:00:48,353
- For real?
- Yeah!
1209
01:00:48,853 --> 01:00:50,938
- This is my friend Harper.
- How you doin'?
1210
01:00:50,938 --> 01:00:52,523
- Nice to meet you, bro.
- Hey.
1211
01:00:52,523 --> 01:00:53,524
- Not a bro though.
- She.
1212
01:00:53,524 --> 01:00:55,610
- It's a she, but that's okay.
- Oh. Sorry.
1213
01:00:55,610 --> 01:00:58,071
That's all right.
You can try again.
1214
01:00:58,071 --> 01:00:59,322
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1215
01:00:59,322 --> 01:01:01,991
About a year and a half ago,
I transitioned.
1216
01:01:02,575 --> 01:01:06,454
And now Will wants to kind of go out
in the middle of the country with me.
1217
01:01:06,454 --> 01:01:09,290
- Oh my goodness. That's great.
- That's cool. Hey, it's...
1218
01:01:09,874 --> 01:01:12,043
I like your support for your friend.
1219
01:01:12,627 --> 01:01:15,755
No, that's amazing.
There's not a lot of that nowadays.
1220
01:01:15,755 --> 01:01:17,924
- You know?
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1221
01:01:17,924 --> 01:01:19,676
I got a lot of... friends...
1222
01:01:21,177 --> 01:01:23,221
Do you have a lot of trans friends?
1223
01:01:23,763 --> 01:01:25,431
- Not trans, but they are bi.
- I do.
1224
01:01:25,431 --> 01:01:28,393
- Yeah? You do?
- Oh yeah. Sure.
1225
01:01:28,393 --> 01:01:29,977
Sure.
1226
01:01:29,977 --> 01:01:32,814
Wait, Harper,
these are Native American--
1227
01:01:32,814 --> 01:01:36,067
- They want to sing us a... Yeah.
- Native America, here we go.
1228
01:01:36,067 --> 01:01:39,320
So here we go. Here's a little bit
of Oklahoma and Native America.
1229
01:02:11,436 --> 01:02:12,437
Yeah!
1230
01:02:12,437 --> 01:02:13,396
Whoo!
1231
01:02:13,396 --> 01:02:15,189
- Wow.
- Nice to meet you.
1232
01:02:15,189 --> 01:02:17,233
- Wow.
- Welcome to Oklahoma.
1233
01:02:17,233 --> 01:02:19,944
- That's beautiful.
- Welcome to Native America.
1234
01:02:19,944 --> 01:02:22,155
- Yeah, exactly.
- Thank you.
1235
01:02:22,155 --> 01:02:23,114
Thank you.
1236
01:02:30,955 --> 01:02:31,914
Wow.
1237
01:02:32,498 --> 01:02:35,293
- Be safe. So nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
1238
01:02:35,293 --> 01:02:38,588
- That was very--
- I tried to give you a bit of Oklahoma.
1239
01:02:38,588 --> 01:02:40,506
- That was very touching, buddy.
- Thank you.
1240
01:02:41,007 --> 01:02:44,010
- Enjoy your time here. Be safe.
- Thanks for comin'.
1241
01:02:44,010 --> 01:02:46,095
- Hey. Thanks for having us.
- Yup.
1242
01:02:46,637 --> 01:02:47,764
Have a good night.
1243
01:02:53,853 --> 01:02:59,233
♪ Let us be lovers
We'll marry our fortunes together ♪
1244
01:03:02,361 --> 01:03:07,575
♪ I've got some real estate
Here in my bag ♪
1245
01:03:07,575 --> 01:03:09,660
♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
1246
01:03:09,660 --> 01:03:12,205
♪ So we bought a pack of cigarettes ♪
1247
01:03:12,205 --> 01:03:16,918
♪ And Mrs. Wagner pies ♪
1248
01:03:16,918 --> 01:03:23,716
♪ And we walked off to look for America... ♪
1249
01:03:25,843 --> 01:03:27,261
- Hey.
- I'm Travis Cobb.
1250
01:03:27,261 --> 01:03:30,097
- Hi, Travis. This is my friend Harper.
- How you doing?
1251
01:03:30,097 --> 01:03:31,516
- Harper, Travis.
- Nice to meet you.
1252
01:03:35,645 --> 01:03:38,064
I used to come out
to these kind of places before
1253
01:03:38,064 --> 01:03:41,025
when I was... still a guy.
1254
01:03:41,567 --> 01:03:44,695
And then I transitioned,
and I got a little afraid because...
1255
01:03:44,695 --> 01:03:47,698
- You know what I'm saying. So...
- Yeah. No, don't be afraid.
1256
01:03:47,698 --> 01:03:48,783
Yeah, okay.
1257
01:03:48,783 --> 01:03:51,828
- If you enjoy it, come out.
- All right, thank you.
1258
01:03:51,828 --> 01:03:53,329
- You know?
- Yeah.
1259
01:03:58,709 --> 01:04:02,672
- Don't worry about it. You know?
- No, I think that's... that's good to hear.
1260
01:04:03,172 --> 01:04:06,342
That's not how I felt. I keep hearing
on the news all this terrible stuff.
1261
01:04:06,342 --> 01:04:07,426
Are you happy?
1262
01:04:07,426 --> 01:04:10,096
Oh, I'm 100% happier. You bet I am.
1263
01:04:12,890 --> 01:04:14,016
Thank you.
1264
01:04:14,016 --> 01:04:15,685
Thanks, guys. Pleasure.
1265
01:04:20,565 --> 01:04:25,403
I'm a little bit in shock.
And that's not on them. That's on me.
1266
01:04:27,989 --> 01:04:30,825
I'm not really afraid of these people.
1267
01:04:30,825 --> 01:04:31,993
Yeah, right.
1268
01:04:31,993 --> 01:04:34,829
I'm afraid of hating myself.
1269
01:04:36,247 --> 01:04:37,081
Whoa.
1270
01:04:38,416 --> 01:04:42,837
And I'm like, "You are a freak.
What are you doing here?"
1271
01:04:42,837 --> 01:04:45,172
There's just-- That is sitting underneath.
1272
01:04:45,882 --> 01:04:47,466
And then...
1273
01:04:50,177 --> 01:04:51,178
Agh!
1274
01:04:51,804 --> 01:04:52,889
Yeah.
1275
01:05:05,151 --> 01:05:06,068
Oh boy.
1276
01:05:11,282 --> 01:05:12,199
God...
1277
01:05:13,326 --> 01:05:14,577
Yeah, it's okay. I just--
1278
01:05:14,577 --> 01:05:16,871
- It's okay.
- I don't even-- Oh my God.
1279
01:05:16,871 --> 01:05:18,664
Yeah.
1280
01:05:27,256 --> 01:05:28,174
Agh.
1281
01:05:29,425 --> 01:05:31,260
Thanks, buddy. Ooh.
1282
01:05:49,403 --> 01:05:52,198
December 2016.
1283
01:05:54,617 --> 01:05:56,577
"I know some mornings, like this one."
1284
01:05:57,078 --> 01:05:59,580
"I wake up without any connection
to the world,
1285
01:06:00,081 --> 01:06:03,250
positive that to connect with
a woman or a man,
1286
01:06:03,250 --> 01:06:05,544
I would have to lie and hide myself."
1287
01:06:06,295 --> 01:06:07,880
"That is very depressing."
1288
01:06:09,173 --> 01:06:12,760
"I dream of a world where I can lay
my vulnerabilities out there -
1289
01:06:12,760 --> 01:06:15,638
open for everyone
until they are my strengths."
1290
01:06:16,138 --> 01:06:17,556
"I am longing for this."
1291
01:06:19,809 --> 01:06:22,061
That's one of the things
I was gonna ask about
1292
01:06:22,061 --> 01:06:24,647
which we kind of haven't touched upon.
1293
01:06:25,356 --> 01:06:28,901
- I'm assuming you wanna start dating?
- Yeah.
1294
01:06:29,402 --> 01:06:31,070
- Yes.
- Right? And you wanna...
1295
01:06:31,862 --> 01:06:37,118
And you wanna go out
and go to the bar and pick up someone
1296
01:06:37,118 --> 01:06:39,829
or be picked up, that kind of encounter.
1297
01:06:39,829 --> 01:06:42,832
- I am a monogamous person.
- Yeah.
1298
01:06:42,832 --> 01:06:46,043
And I... I'm optimistic.
1299
01:06:46,043 --> 01:06:47,253
- Yeah.
- I'm 61.
1300
01:06:47,253 --> 01:06:51,257
But I would love to be
in a relationship again.
1301
01:06:51,257 --> 01:06:55,219
And are-- In your mind's eye,
are you interested in a trans woman?
1302
01:06:55,928 --> 01:06:56,846
- Uh...
- Sure.
1303
01:06:56,846 --> 01:06:58,639
- A man? Or... Yeah.
- Sure.
1304
01:06:58,639 --> 01:07:01,225
- Sure. Yeah, sure.
- Okay, yeah. Gotcha. Okay.
1305
01:07:01,225 --> 01:07:05,229
I mean, for me, it sounds corny,
but the type is the one that--
1306
01:07:05,229 --> 01:07:07,398
- It's a blank canvas at this point.
- Yeah.
1307
01:07:07,398 --> 01:07:11,402
And the one that I can wake up
in the morning, drink coffee in bed,
1308
01:07:11,402 --> 01:07:14,321
and talk about the stupid movie
we watched the night before.
1309
01:07:14,321 --> 01:07:16,407
- That's the main thing. Yeah.
- That's--
1310
01:07:16,407 --> 01:07:18,617
I really have to say,
I know that sounds corny.
1311
01:07:18,617 --> 01:07:21,328
But I am waiting
for that experience to happen.
1312
01:07:21,328 --> 01:07:24,415
And I'm 61,
so the clock's ticking.
1313
01:07:27,793 --> 01:07:29,795
State line. "Welcome to Texas."
1314
01:07:30,755 --> 01:07:32,923
Yeah. "Welcome to Texas."
1315
01:07:32,923 --> 01:07:35,134
♪ ...from Boston to St. Louis... ♪
1316
01:07:35,134 --> 01:07:36,927
Take one of me kind of sexy.
1317
01:07:36,927 --> 01:07:38,596
♪ I don't even know... ♪
1318
01:07:38,596 --> 01:07:40,890
Oh yeah!
1319
01:07:40,890 --> 01:07:42,224
♪ 'Cause I like my women... ♪
1320
01:07:42,224 --> 01:07:43,809
- On the count of three.
- Yeah.
1321
01:07:43,809 --> 01:07:45,352
Texas!
1322
01:07:47,480 --> 01:07:48,898
♪ So roll on, big wheels ♪
1323
01:07:48,898 --> 01:07:51,025
♪ Don't you roll so slow... ♪
1324
01:07:53,235 --> 01:07:54,111
Whoa!
1325
01:07:54,111 --> 01:07:56,113
- What?
-"Free 72-ounce steak."
1326
01:07:56,113 --> 01:07:59,450
That's the Big Texan.
Okay. We're gonna go there tonight.
1327
01:07:59,450 --> 01:08:01,952
Oh, you gotta eat it in one hour though.
1328
01:08:01,952 --> 01:08:04,371
- One hour?
- I think that's what it said.
1329
01:08:04,872 --> 01:08:05,831
You could do it.
1330
01:08:05,831 --> 01:08:07,792
I mean,
I don't know if I could do it,
1331
01:08:07,792 --> 01:08:11,212
but I know of
a certain Victorian-era detective
1332
01:08:11,212 --> 01:08:13,297
who would find it delicious.
1333
01:08:13,297 --> 01:08:14,256
No, no.
1334
01:08:14,256 --> 01:08:16,300
- Oh yeah.
- Oh boy.
1335
01:08:27,394 --> 01:08:28,521
Yeah!
1336
01:08:31,649 --> 01:08:33,150
Ladies and gentlemen,
1337
01:08:33,818 --> 01:08:37,321
the world's greatest private investigator,
Sherlock Holmes.
1338
01:08:41,242 --> 01:08:42,993
Ricky Bobby!
1339
01:08:44,078 --> 01:08:46,914
Not Ricky Bobby, Sherlock Holmes.
1340
01:08:48,124 --> 01:08:51,460
- I packed this hoping--
- Yes.
1341
01:08:51,460 --> 01:08:53,796
- To get you at some point.
- And here it is.
1342
01:08:55,714 --> 01:08:57,967
- Oh boy!
- Hey! Hi, how are you?
1343
01:08:57,967 --> 01:08:59,969
- Blessed, brother.
- Nice to meet you.
1344
01:08:59,969 --> 01:09:01,720
How do you want me
to announce you?
1345
01:09:01,720 --> 01:09:03,931
- Sherlock Holmes from London, England.
- Yep.
1346
01:09:04,431 --> 01:09:07,226
- With his guest, Harper Steele.
- Harper Steele.
1347
01:09:07,226 --> 01:09:09,311
- Ms. Harper Steele.
- Miss Harper Steele?
1348
01:09:09,311 --> 01:09:11,063
- Ms.
- Yeah, Ms. Harper Steele.
1349
01:09:11,063 --> 01:09:13,023
Ms. Harper Steele. Done.
1350
01:09:13,524 --> 01:09:16,694
We have Sherlock Holmes
all the way from London, England,
1351
01:09:16,694 --> 01:09:19,572
with his guest, uh... Harper Steele,
1352
01:09:19,572 --> 01:09:22,950
Ms. Harper Steele. And he has
one hour to eat a 72-ounce steak.
1353
01:09:28,372 --> 01:09:29,540
Oh, can I get a beer?
1354
01:09:43,554 --> 01:09:45,431
I'm eating out of nervousness.
1355
01:09:46,015 --> 01:09:49,226
As much as I've been in a fishbowl
in various times in my life...
1356
01:09:49,226 --> 01:09:50,227
Yeah.
1357
01:09:50,227 --> 01:09:51,979
...this trumps all of it.
1358
01:10:41,737 --> 01:10:42,863
Last night was...
1359
01:10:45,074 --> 01:10:49,662
The room started to feel
very... wrong to me,
1360
01:10:49,662 --> 01:10:54,416
and, I mean, the crowds
that come around you so quickly.
1361
01:10:54,416 --> 01:10:56,168
I was feeling a little like
1362
01:10:57,169 --> 01:11:00,464
my transness was on display, I guess.
1363
01:11:01,131 --> 01:11:06,095
And suddenly,
that sort of made me feel... not great.
1364
01:11:09,515 --> 01:11:10,557
You know? Um...
1365
01:11:10,557 --> 01:11:13,060
Oh, the saddest part for me is, uh...
1366
01:11:18,482 --> 01:11:19,566
I just feel...
1367
01:11:23,237 --> 01:11:24,238
Oh boy.
1368
01:11:24,863 --> 01:11:26,824
Oh! Okay.
1369
01:11:26,824 --> 01:11:29,201
I feel like I let you down in that moment.
1370
01:11:29,201 --> 01:11:31,078
- Oh, no, no, no.
- You know?
1371
01:11:31,078 --> 01:11:32,079
And...
1372
01:11:33,163 --> 01:11:35,040
I was like, "Oh shit. I got--"
1373
01:11:35,749 --> 01:11:38,210
"We gotta worry
about Harper's safety."
1374
01:11:38,210 --> 01:11:39,753
You know? Like, what...
1375
01:11:40,629 --> 01:11:43,882
That's where I just--
I feel like I-- Yeah.
1376
01:11:55,978 --> 01:11:59,440
I was gonna read
some of the tweets we've been receiving
1377
01:11:59,440 --> 01:12:02,568
since we started this trip.
You wanna hear this one?
1378
01:12:03,193 --> 01:12:04,361
"Ah, very important
1379
01:12:04,361 --> 01:12:07,406
you have another gender bender
for the kids to see."
1380
01:12:07,406 --> 01:12:11,243
"It's so trendy and cool,
even Will Ferrell's doing it."
1381
01:12:12,161 --> 01:12:15,289
"It really sucks that Will Ferrell
shows up to his first Pacers game
1382
01:12:15,289 --> 01:12:16,540
with a trans woman."
1383
01:12:16,540 --> 01:12:17,791
"Who's that dude?"
1384
01:12:18,542 --> 01:12:20,377
Oh yeah, yeah. Here's a good one though.
1385
01:12:20,377 --> 01:12:22,629
"Will Ferrell stopped in Iowa City today."
1386
01:12:22,629 --> 01:12:25,382
"He and Ryan Reynolds are making
a road trip documentary
1387
01:12:25,382 --> 01:12:27,176
supporting trans kids and rights."
1388
01:12:27,176 --> 01:12:28,844
Ryan's--
1389
01:12:29,636 --> 01:12:32,556
I didn't realize
Ry... Ryan's a part of everything.
1390
01:12:32,556 --> 01:12:34,558
- Oh, here's one just about you.
- Okay.
1391
01:12:34,558 --> 01:12:36,101
- Wanna hear this one?
- Yes, please.
1392
01:12:36,101 --> 01:12:39,730
"Great,
a satanic Illuminati pedophile in Iowa."
1393
01:12:40,564 --> 01:12:42,483
And that's me?
1394
01:12:42,483 --> 01:12:44,568
Yeah. How do you feel about that?
1395
01:12:47,071 --> 01:12:50,866
It just feels ridiculous. I don't--
I have no emotional-- I mean...
1396
01:12:51,367 --> 01:12:55,788
That stuff, you can't underestimate
the damage that all that does.
1397
01:12:57,081 --> 01:12:59,792
When you're trans,
you ingest a lot of that shit,
1398
01:12:59,792 --> 01:13:01,377
and it sits in your head.
1399
01:13:02,044 --> 01:13:03,921
- Those tweets are in my head.
- Yeah.
1400
01:13:17,267 --> 01:13:20,854
When... when hatred is pointed
at me and trans people,
1401
01:13:21,605 --> 01:13:23,899
they're like, "You're not a woman."
1402
01:13:23,899 --> 01:13:25,526
"You'll never be a woman."
1403
01:13:26,068 --> 01:13:30,280
Okay, I... you know,
I am a trans woman. I'm fine with that.
1404
01:13:30,280 --> 01:13:33,242
- But I am feeling something, you know?
- Yeah.
1405
01:13:33,242 --> 01:13:35,869
And it's not unhealthy.
1406
01:13:35,869 --> 01:13:39,456
It's made me actually healthier
in many respects.
1407
01:13:39,456 --> 01:13:41,291
- Yeah, yeah.
- It saved my life, I think.
1408
01:13:41,291 --> 01:13:43,210
And I'm not joking about that.
1409
01:13:44,795 --> 01:13:48,715
Did you come really close
at any point to... to...
1410
01:13:50,092 --> 01:13:53,637
I know you had dark thoughts,
but suicidal though-- I mean, did you...
1411
01:13:55,097 --> 01:13:57,599
Was it that intense at times?
1412
01:13:58,851 --> 01:14:00,644
- Yes.
- Yeah.
1413
01:14:01,145 --> 01:14:02,729
- Yes, I, uh...
- Yeah.
1414
01:14:02,729 --> 01:14:06,525
I'm gonna say...
six years ago, maybe,
1415
01:14:07,109 --> 01:14:08,652
I went to the gun place,
1416
01:14:09,486 --> 01:14:11,488
and... [chuckles] ...the guy,
1417
01:14:12,573 --> 01:14:13,615
he asked me, uh,
1418
01:14:13,615 --> 01:14:17,828
"Is it for, uh, targets,
or is it for, uh, security?"
1419
01:14:18,579 --> 01:14:21,498
And I was like, "Oh," uh,
'cause I know nothing about guns.
1420
01:14:21,498 --> 01:14:24,334
- Me neither.
- Right, and I'm like, "Um..."
1421
01:14:25,043 --> 01:14:26,920
"Uh... well, yeah, maybe both."
1422
01:14:26,920 --> 01:14:29,381
"I'm in a kinda isolated house."
I'm trying to lie.
1423
01:14:30,382 --> 01:14:32,217
So I picked it up,
and I was looking at it,
1424
01:14:32,217 --> 01:14:33,802
and I was super scared.
1425
01:14:34,386 --> 01:14:36,096
- Golly.
- I walked out of there.
1426
01:14:36,096 --> 01:14:38,640
I was just like,
"Okay. I'm gonna come back."
1427
01:14:38,640 --> 01:14:40,017
"I'm gonna think about it."
1428
01:14:40,017 --> 01:14:42,644
Up until the moment,
really, I transitioned,
1429
01:14:42,644 --> 01:14:44,855
I didn't wanna have a gun around me.
1430
01:14:45,397 --> 01:14:48,233
- Because it could be an impulsive thing.
- Yeah.
1431
01:14:48,233 --> 01:14:52,279
Because there was definitely moments
where I thought, "I wish I had that gun."
1432
01:14:52,863 --> 01:14:56,033
But the moment I transitioned,
1433
01:14:56,033 --> 01:14:57,618
all I wanted to do was live.
1434
01:14:57,618 --> 01:14:58,619
- Oh.
- Just live.
1435
01:14:58,619 --> 01:15:00,537
Live and... and continue on the path...
1436
01:15:00,537 --> 01:15:02,539
Oh my God. I got this free gift.
1437
01:15:02,539 --> 01:15:03,665
...being really who you are.
1438
01:15:03,665 --> 01:15:04,583
- Yes.
- Wow.
1439
01:15:38,283 --> 01:15:40,994
This is already awesome.
1440
01:15:43,539 --> 01:15:49,461
I feel such a strong
Albuquerque connection with Harper
1441
01:15:49,461 --> 01:15:52,839
because I was here working on MacGruber
1442
01:15:52,839 --> 01:15:56,343
when we all first found out
that you were transitioning.
1443
01:15:57,094 --> 01:16:00,931
And it was here
exactly one year ago today.
1444
01:16:03,475 --> 01:16:04,685
I will say
1445
01:16:04,685 --> 01:16:08,355
part of me feels like I should have
made that decision 40 years ago,
1446
01:16:08,939 --> 01:16:11,358
but I wouldn't have met you guys.
1447
01:16:11,358 --> 01:16:15,529
I would not have gotten hired at--
started a comedy world, probably.
1448
01:16:15,529 --> 01:16:17,906
- I would have had a different life, so...
- Yeah.
1449
01:16:17,906 --> 01:16:19,908
Too many good things happened.
1450
01:16:23,287 --> 01:16:26,582
Ooh! Are you guys feeling
the same thing I'm feeling? A little--
1451
01:16:26,582 --> 01:16:29,626
- Yeah, it's pretty high.
- Wait. Hold on. Hold on.
1452
01:16:29,626 --> 01:16:31,461
What is it?
1453
01:16:31,461 --> 01:16:34,506
- You guys hear those dogs down there?
- Yeah, yeah, I do.
1454
01:16:36,758 --> 01:16:37,718
Yeah, do--
1455
01:16:38,468 --> 01:16:39,970
Quiet!
1456
01:16:40,470 --> 01:16:41,847
Shut your dog up!
1457
01:16:43,682 --> 01:16:45,851
Shut your damn dog up!
1458
01:16:47,561 --> 01:16:50,355
The neighborhood
is sick and tired of your dog!
1459
01:16:53,275 --> 01:16:55,110
Now more dogs are barking!
1460
01:17:01,992 --> 01:17:03,869
- Oh my goodness.
- Wow.
1461
01:17:03,869 --> 01:17:07,205
- Make a toast.
- It is an honor to be here.
1462
01:17:07,205 --> 01:17:11,418
I have so much respect for you
and the journey that you've gone on,
1463
01:17:11,418 --> 01:17:14,463
and I'm... I could not be more proud of you
1464
01:17:14,463 --> 01:17:18,050
and... and love, uh, love you very much.
1465
01:17:18,050 --> 01:17:19,801
- Thank you so much.
- To you. To both of you.
1466
01:17:19,801 --> 01:17:22,512
And here's to, uh,
a good rest of the journey.
1467
01:17:23,889 --> 01:17:25,432
I'm gonna really pop it.
1468
01:17:25,432 --> 01:17:26,725
Okay. All right.
1469
01:17:46,328 --> 01:17:48,705
♪ I'm a-drivin' this truck
On a mountain road ♪
1470
01:17:48,705 --> 01:17:50,666
♪ I got a hot rod rig
And I'm a-flyin' low ♪
1471
01:17:50,666 --> 01:17:52,959
♪ My eyes are filled with diesel smoke ♪
1472
01:17:52,959 --> 01:17:55,420
♪ Hairpin curves ain't no joke ♪
1473
01:17:55,420 --> 01:17:57,297
♪ Diesel smoke... ♪
1474
01:17:59,716 --> 01:18:00,884
Whoa.
1475
01:18:00,884 --> 01:18:03,762
Whoa, Nelly.
1476
01:18:05,013 --> 01:18:07,391
♪ I was out last night
Drinking beer with the guys ♪
1477
01:18:07,391 --> 01:18:09,518
♪ Got an achin' head and bloodshot eyes ♪
1478
01:18:09,518 --> 01:18:11,645
♪ I ended up with a pretty little dame ♪
1479
01:18:11,645 --> 01:18:13,897
♪ I didn't even know her name ♪
1480
01:18:13,897 --> 01:18:15,816
♪ Diesel smoke... ♪
1481
01:18:16,400 --> 01:18:17,776
We should call Kristen.
1482
01:18:17,776 --> 01:18:19,361
- We haven't heard...
- Anything.
1483
01:18:19,361 --> 01:18:21,279
...hide nor hair from that lady.
1484
01:18:22,322 --> 01:18:24,825
At the tone,
please record your message.
1485
01:18:24,825 --> 01:18:27,160
Hey, Kristen,
it's Harper and Will.
1486
01:18:27,160 --> 01:18:30,080
Just checking in to see
how the song's coming,
1487
01:18:30,080 --> 01:18:32,499
if it's coming along.
And if it's not, that's okay.
1488
01:18:32,499 --> 01:18:36,503
And, uh, once again,
to echo what Harper's saying, no pressure.
1489
01:18:36,503 --> 01:18:38,130
- No pressure.
- But I just--
1490
01:18:38,130 --> 01:18:40,632
We would like to know how are you fee--
1491
01:18:40,632 --> 01:18:43,135
Are you happy
with the direction you have so far?
1492
01:18:43,135 --> 01:18:45,303
- Right. Okay. Yeah, thanks.
- Thank you.
1493
01:18:51,017 --> 01:18:53,145
Ooh!
Oh, oh, oh, oh, Dunkin' Donuts.
1494
01:18:53,145 --> 01:18:54,688
- No.
- Why can't we?
1495
01:18:54,688 --> 01:18:56,440
- No.
- Oh, just this once?
1496
01:18:56,440 --> 01:18:59,568
We never have
to stop again. Just wanted to stop once.
1497
01:18:59,568 --> 01:19:02,946
This trip has been horrible.
1498
01:19:02,946 --> 01:19:04,573
We haven't stopped once.
1499
01:19:05,073 --> 01:19:06,575
Wanted Dunkin' Donuts.
1500
01:19:06,575 --> 01:19:09,244
This stupid trip.
1501
01:19:09,244 --> 01:19:11,538
All we've done is talk to trans people.
1502
01:19:12,789 --> 01:19:15,375
We've not done one fun thing.
1503
01:19:15,375 --> 01:19:17,419
Name one fun thing we've done.
1504
01:19:17,419 --> 01:19:19,921
- What are you talking about?
- Name one fun thing.
1505
01:19:19,921 --> 01:19:24,092
Okay. But... Really?
Maybe you're just hungry.
1506
01:19:24,092 --> 01:19:26,511
I wanted to go to Dunkin' Donuts.
1507
01:19:26,511 --> 01:19:28,680
That's all I wanted to do.
1508
01:19:28,680 --> 01:19:31,349
I never get to do anything I want.
1509
01:19:49,493 --> 01:19:51,578
Could someone
take a picture of us?
1510
01:19:51,578 --> 01:19:53,205
- Sure.
- Thank you.
1511
01:19:54,289 --> 01:19:57,501
- Is... The Grand Canyon was in the picture?
- Of course it was!
1512
01:19:57,501 --> 01:19:59,753
- You got some canyon.
- Oh, okay.
1513
01:19:59,753 --> 01:20:01,880
- Where you guys from?
- Syracuse, New York.
1514
01:20:01,880 --> 01:20:03,089
- Oh, so--
- Oh!
1515
01:20:03,089 --> 01:20:04,257
I'm a New Yorker.
1516
01:20:04,257 --> 01:20:07,719
- New Yorker. We're on a road trip as well.
- Yeah.
1517
01:20:08,303 --> 01:20:11,139
- Harper transitioned...
- I transitioned, and we're just sort of...
1518
01:20:11,139 --> 01:20:14,184
We're kinda discussing
what that means for our friendship.
1519
01:20:14,768 --> 01:20:17,938
- Do you mind if I ask you a question?
- Yeah, good. I would love it.
1520
01:20:17,938 --> 01:20:22,818
I'm just wondering how early you knew,
how early you wanted to.
1521
01:20:24,027 --> 01:20:25,779
I think growing up in Iowa,
1522
01:20:26,822 --> 01:20:29,908
it was so impossible
to think something like that.
1523
01:20:29,908 --> 01:20:32,702
- Uh-huh.
- So I just think I couldn't--
1524
01:20:32,702 --> 01:20:35,372
I thought I was weird.
I knew something was weird about me.
1525
01:20:35,372 --> 01:20:37,040
I definitely knew that and...
1526
01:20:37,040 --> 01:20:41,795
But I also came around to thinking
that... the kind of weird I was was normal.
1527
01:20:42,295 --> 01:20:46,383
So about ten years ago, it just started
to explode in me a little more.
1528
01:20:47,092 --> 01:20:47,968
- And I just--
- Wow.
1529
01:20:47,968 --> 01:20:51,388
I kept fighting it and fighting it
and talking to therapists and...
1530
01:20:51,972 --> 01:20:53,431
- Yeah.
- You know what?
1531
01:20:53,431 --> 01:20:55,934
- I'm a retired therapist.
- Oh. Oh, okay.
1532
01:20:55,934 --> 01:20:59,145
I had a patient very early in my career,
1533
01:20:59,145 --> 01:21:02,524
so now we're talking... 30 years ago,
1534
01:21:02,524 --> 01:21:04,109
and he came in and said,
1535
01:21:05,443 --> 01:21:07,571
"I'm happily married. I love my wife."
1536
01:21:07,571 --> 01:21:08,488
Yeah, yeah.
1537
01:21:08,488 --> 01:21:10,824
"But I dress in her clothes
whenever I can."
1538
01:21:10,824 --> 01:21:13,535
- Yeah.
-"And I don't think I'm--"
1539
01:21:14,578 --> 01:21:17,163
"I don't... I don't...
I don't know what I am."
1540
01:21:17,163 --> 01:21:19,875
- Yeah, yeah. How did you work through it?
- Yeah.
1541
01:21:19,875 --> 01:21:23,378
- I was very closed-minded about it.
- Yeah, yeah.
1542
01:21:23,378 --> 01:21:27,173
Sort of afraid
to go into really unknown territory.
1543
01:21:27,173 --> 01:21:29,009
- It was unknown to me.
- Yeah.
1544
01:21:29,009 --> 01:21:32,596
Can I tell you, I had a therapist
like that that sort of stopped me.
1545
01:21:32,596 --> 01:21:33,680
Ah, I...
1546
01:21:33,680 --> 01:21:35,849
And... and... and again, I'm not--
1547
01:21:35,849 --> 01:21:39,102
I stopped myself enough
that I don't blame anyone.
1548
01:21:39,686 --> 01:21:42,105
- Yeah, that's...
- I tried to be open and supportive.
1549
01:21:42,105 --> 01:21:45,233
But I know
that a lot of my subtle messages were...
1550
01:21:45,233 --> 01:21:46,443
Of course.
1551
01:21:46,443 --> 01:21:49,613
- But I've got this my whole life.
-"But you love your wife and..."
1552
01:21:49,613 --> 01:21:51,114
Yeah, I know. So...
1553
01:21:51,114 --> 01:21:53,533
-"You love your wife, your life."
- Yeah.
1554
01:21:53,533 --> 01:21:55,660
-"Why would you do this?"
- You know?
1555
01:21:55,660 --> 01:21:58,246
- Surgery is a huge...
- "Can you manage it?"
1556
01:21:58,246 --> 01:22:03,126
Yeah. I know that I was a blockade
in that man's-- in that person's life.
1557
01:22:11,468 --> 01:22:13,470
- Here's your blue chair.
- Okay.
1558
01:22:16,848 --> 01:22:19,935
If you named that beer,
what would the name of the beer be?
1559
01:22:20,852 --> 01:22:22,312
- There's no question.
- Yeah.
1560
01:22:23,271 --> 01:22:24,689
Cornelius Danderhoff.
1561
01:22:25,315 --> 01:22:27,859
- Your beer's called Cornelius Danderhoff?
- Mm-hmm.
1562
01:22:28,777 --> 01:22:30,195
- Keep that name.
- Okay.
1563
01:22:32,364 --> 01:22:35,241
This is Dolores O'Brien.
I'm gonna drink her all up.
1564
01:22:36,785 --> 01:22:38,370
But I wanna show you something.
1565
01:22:38,870 --> 01:22:43,124
I have something very special
for my good friend Cornelius Danderhoff.
1566
01:22:45,168 --> 01:22:47,003
- Oh!
- It's a coat.
1567
01:22:48,421 --> 01:22:49,756
It's a beverage jacket.
1568
01:22:50,256 --> 01:22:52,008
It's a... a beverage--
1569
01:22:52,008 --> 01:22:55,720
Well, I don't think of-- I actually don't
think of Dolores as a beverage.
1570
01:22:55,720 --> 01:22:58,598
But I don't know
how you wanna think of it.
1571
01:22:58,598 --> 01:23:00,850
No, Cornelius is gonna love this.
1572
01:23:00,850 --> 01:23:02,435
Oh, just... huh...
1573
01:23:03,436 --> 01:23:04,479
Check this out.
1574
01:23:05,897 --> 01:23:07,440
Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho.
1575
01:23:07,440 --> 01:23:10,026
You look adorable, Dolores.
1576
01:23:10,568 --> 01:23:14,322
This new jacket of yours
reminds me of my own.
1577
01:23:14,322 --> 01:23:15,657
You look adorable.
1578
01:23:16,241 --> 01:23:18,827
- Oh, Cornelius. That's so sophisticated.
- Cornelius.
1579
01:23:19,327 --> 01:23:20,412
Guess what?
1580
01:23:20,412 --> 01:23:22,163
I have a surprise for you.
1581
01:23:23,289 --> 01:23:27,252
- Look how sharp you look, Cornelius.
- Oh, Cornelius. Really.
1582
01:23:27,252 --> 01:23:29,587
Cornelius, you need to lose a few.
1583
01:23:29,587 --> 01:23:32,799
- Well, help Cornelius lose a few pounds.
- I...
1584
01:23:32,799 --> 01:23:35,010
- Look how sharp Cornelius looks.
- Look at--
1585
01:23:35,010 --> 01:23:37,595
"Hey, hi. Would you like
to go on a date sometime?"
1586
01:23:37,595 --> 01:23:40,557
-"No." Well, that was a little forward.
-"My word!"
1587
01:24:05,081 --> 01:24:07,042
- Your first time?
- Yeah.
1588
01:24:07,042 --> 01:24:09,919
- Swimming in a... public place.
- In a public place.
1589
01:24:09,919 --> 01:24:11,504
You're taking a chance.
1590
01:24:11,504 --> 01:24:12,505
Yeah.
1591
01:24:12,505 --> 01:24:14,924
- I wanna make you feel at home.
- Oh.
1592
01:24:15,425 --> 01:24:16,676
So...
1593
01:24:23,016 --> 01:24:24,100
Mark Spitz!
1594
01:24:27,228 --> 01:24:28,438
Double cannonball!
1595
01:24:32,150 --> 01:24:33,068
Is it set?
1596
01:24:34,444 --> 01:24:37,155
God, that's freakin' sexy.
1597
01:24:37,155 --> 01:24:39,616
Relaxing with Mark Spitz.
1598
01:24:40,450 --> 01:24:41,951
Okay.
1599
01:24:43,703 --> 01:24:47,373
It's good. It's sexy.
I hope that comes out.
1600
01:24:47,373 --> 01:24:51,002
So swimming in a... a public pool.
1601
01:24:53,463 --> 01:24:55,340
I mean, I love it. I really do love it.
1602
01:24:55,340 --> 01:24:56,591
- Okay.
- I love it.
1603
01:24:56,591 --> 01:24:58,885
I would've liked my suit
to fit better, honestly,
1604
01:24:58,885 --> 01:25:02,138
but I don't think I'm any different
than any woman on the planet
1605
01:25:02,138 --> 01:25:03,848
when it comes to bathing suits.
1606
01:25:03,848 --> 01:25:07,852
I'd be a little more comfortable
in a perfectly fitting suit, I think.
1607
01:25:07,852 --> 01:25:09,145
I think you look great.
1608
01:25:09,646 --> 01:25:13,441
Thank you. I really--
I... I do believe that you mean that. Right?
1609
01:25:14,025 --> 01:25:18,571
The irony that I have done
so many shirtless things
1610
01:25:18,571 --> 01:25:20,740
and things in my underwear or in a Speedo
1611
01:25:20,740 --> 01:25:22,742
is that I'm a fairly modest person.
1612
01:25:22,742 --> 01:25:24,494
No, I know that. I know that.
1613
01:25:24,494 --> 01:25:27,831
When it comes to comedy,
though, which you love...
1614
01:25:27,831 --> 01:25:30,416
- Whatever it takes.
- You will sacrifice yourself.
1615
01:25:30,416 --> 01:25:32,585
That's why I was excited no one was here.
1616
01:25:32,585 --> 01:25:37,841
'Cause I put the Speedo on, I used to be
kind of like comedically out of shape.
1617
01:25:37,841 --> 01:25:39,884
Now I'm like, "Oh boy." Not good.
1618
01:25:40,718 --> 01:25:42,762
I mean,
I know you're being honest.
1619
01:25:42,762 --> 01:25:43,972
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1620
01:25:43,972 --> 01:25:46,474
I know you're a little overweight, uh,
1621
01:25:46,474 --> 01:25:48,476
in places
that you don't wanna be right now.
1622
01:25:48,476 --> 01:25:49,394
Right.
1623
01:25:49,394 --> 01:25:52,939
But when you put on that suit in D.C.,
you are a handsome man.
1624
01:25:53,439 --> 01:25:56,067
To our great looks.
1625
01:26:04,075 --> 01:26:09,164
♪ Ooh, Las Vegas ♪
1626
01:26:09,164 --> 01:26:11,875
♪ Ain't no place for a poor boy like me... ♪
1627
01:26:11,875 --> 01:26:14,002
- What do you wanna do in Vegas?
- Not my favorite city.
1628
01:26:14,002 --> 01:26:15,962
- You're not much of a gambler.
- No.
1629
01:26:15,962 --> 01:26:19,424
Why don't you take me
to a very fancy dinner?
1630
01:26:19,424 --> 01:26:22,427
'Cause they've got
some five-star restaurants now in Vegas.
1631
01:26:22,427 --> 01:26:25,221
Oh, okay, even though
you have yet to pay for anything.
1632
01:26:25,221 --> 01:26:26,890
- Yeah.
- I'm not opposed to that.
1633
01:26:26,890 --> 01:26:28,641
- Okay.
- Let's dress up.
1634
01:26:28,641 --> 01:26:31,060
Like, I'm not gonna
pull a Sherlock on you.
1635
01:26:31,060 --> 01:26:32,145
Okay.
1636
01:26:32,145 --> 01:26:35,732
Maybe this is an opportunity
to have more of a normal experience.
1637
01:26:35,732 --> 01:26:38,943
It would make me feel good
because I feel like I would be
1638
01:26:38,943 --> 01:26:42,322
in another environment
that I haven't really been in.
1639
01:26:42,322 --> 01:26:44,115
Let's have a night on the town.
1640
01:26:44,782 --> 01:26:47,410
♪ Ain't no place for a poor boy like me ♪
1641
01:26:48,536 --> 01:26:50,788
♪ Every time I hit your crystal city ♪
1642
01:26:50,788 --> 01:26:53,708
♪ You know you're gonna make
A wreck outta me ♪
1643
01:26:56,002 --> 01:26:58,546
♪ Well, the queen of spades
Is a friend of mine ♪
1644
01:26:58,546 --> 01:27:00,423
♪ The queen of hearts is a bitch ♪
1645
01:27:00,423 --> 01:27:03,343
♪ Someday when I clean up my mind
I'll find out which is which... ♪
1646
01:27:03,343 --> 01:27:04,844
Why, thanks, buddy.
1647
01:27:05,637 --> 01:27:08,932
- You gonna be okay in there?
- Yes. I'm gonna be in there.
1648
01:27:08,932 --> 01:27:12,185
I'm gonna look around,
and I am crossing my fingers,
1649
01:27:12,185 --> 01:27:14,687
hoping I can find
something fun for tonight.
1650
01:27:14,687 --> 01:27:17,023
I'll see you later.
1651
01:27:17,523 --> 01:27:19,484
- Bye. Goodbye.
- Bye-bye.
1652
01:27:28,117 --> 01:27:29,702
Hi, how are you?
1653
01:27:29,702 --> 01:27:32,288
- I'm going to dinner with a friend.
- Okay.
1654
01:27:32,288 --> 01:27:33,206
Um...
1655
01:27:33,957 --> 01:27:36,376
But I... I just need a disguise.
1656
01:27:36,376 --> 01:27:38,169
I need... I need a realistic-loo--
1657
01:27:38,169 --> 01:27:42,632
- I don't want people to know it's me.
- So are you trying to change--
1658
01:27:42,632 --> 01:27:43,841
- I'm Will Ferrell.
- Oh.
1659
01:27:43,841 --> 01:27:46,135
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
- Very nice to meet you. Yeah.
1660
01:27:46,135 --> 01:27:47,720
So, yeah, I just--
1661
01:27:47,720 --> 01:27:50,807
Tonight, we wanna go to dinner
without a famous person.
1662
01:27:50,807 --> 01:27:52,058
- I see, okay.
- Yeah.
1663
01:27:52,058 --> 01:27:55,019
Probably stick away
from some of the brighter colors
1664
01:27:55,019 --> 01:27:56,938
so it doesn't draw attention to you.
1665
01:27:56,938 --> 01:28:00,191
- Right.
- So do something more natural.
1666
01:28:00,775 --> 01:28:04,696
♪ They call you Lady Luck ♪
1667
01:28:06,281 --> 01:28:10,076
♪ You're on this date with me ♪
1668
01:28:11,286 --> 01:28:12,120
♪ And yet... ♪
1669
01:28:12,120 --> 01:28:16,207
This looks like... not someone who lives
in Vegas, but someone who visits, right?
1670
01:28:18,126 --> 01:28:19,294
That's interesting.
1671
01:28:19,294 --> 01:28:21,587
- Dress sizes are crazy, don't you think?
- Yes.
1672
01:28:22,714 --> 01:28:24,382
- I'll try that one.
- That is cute.
1673
01:28:24,382 --> 01:28:26,217
- Right? Thank you.
- Yeah, it is.
1674
01:28:26,217 --> 01:28:29,137
♪ ...the best that I can do... ♪
1675
01:28:29,137 --> 01:28:31,723
I like that.
That one looks better that way.
1676
01:28:31,723 --> 01:28:33,933
♪ ...is pray ♪
1677
01:28:44,444 --> 01:28:47,905
♪ Luck be a lady tonight ♪
1678
01:28:50,992 --> 01:28:56,122
♪ Luck if you've ever been
A lady to begin with ♪
1679
01:28:56,956 --> 01:29:00,376
♪ Luck be a lady tonight... ♪
1680
01:29:03,129 --> 01:29:04,213
Oh, Will?
1681
01:29:05,506 --> 01:29:06,758
William.
1682
01:29:06,758 --> 01:29:10,219
♪ Luck let a gentleman see... ♪
1683
01:29:10,219 --> 01:29:12,347
Oh my God.
1684
01:29:14,223 --> 01:29:15,767
What is going on?
1685
01:29:16,934 --> 01:29:18,394
Oh my God.
1686
01:29:18,978 --> 01:29:22,273
I'm not Will. I'm David Abernathy.
1687
01:29:22,273 --> 01:29:25,234
Oh, David Abernathy.
Do we have a reservation tonight?
1688
01:29:25,234 --> 01:29:26,444
We do.
1689
01:29:26,444 --> 01:29:28,071
Oh my God.
1690
01:29:34,619 --> 01:29:36,954
Oh, thank you, David.
1691
01:29:37,789 --> 01:29:39,415
- You sit here.
- Okay.
1692
01:29:40,041 --> 01:29:40,917
And there.
1693
01:29:42,710 --> 01:29:43,544
Thank you.
1694
01:29:45,755 --> 01:29:46,923
Oh.
1695
01:29:46,923 --> 01:29:48,549
Good evening, ma'am. Good evening, sir.
1696
01:29:48,549 --> 01:29:50,718
- Hello.
- Welcome to the SW Steakhouse.
1697
01:29:50,718 --> 01:29:52,637
- Thank you.
- What a pleasure to have you.
1698
01:29:52,637 --> 01:29:55,098
- Thank you.
- Thank you. I'm David. This is Harper.
1699
01:29:55,098 --> 01:29:56,808
Hi, David. Hi, Harper. I'm John.
1700
01:29:56,808 --> 01:29:58,434
- Hi.
- Pleasure to meet you both.
1701
01:29:58,434 --> 01:30:00,520
- I'm David Abernathy.
- You're Dav-- Sorry?
1702
01:30:00,520 --> 01:30:03,398
- David Abernathy.
- David Abernathy. I'm John Bortles.
1703
01:30:03,398 --> 01:30:05,983
I... I managed Bette Midler
for a little while.
1704
01:30:05,983 --> 01:30:08,027
- Oh wow.
- And Air Supply.
1705
01:30:08,027 --> 01:30:10,029
- Glad to have you.
- Wait.
1706
01:30:10,029 --> 01:30:13,866
- I believe we'd love... two Montagues.
- A Montague.
1707
01:30:13,866 --> 01:30:17,370
Excellent choice. I'll get that started.
One of our signature drinks.
1708
01:30:18,371 --> 01:30:19,247
Cheers to, uh...
1709
01:30:19,247 --> 01:30:21,791
- Cheers to our little experiment.
- Yeah.
1710
01:30:22,500 --> 01:30:24,627
I don't know if it's working or not.
I can't tell.
1711
01:30:24,627 --> 01:30:26,087
I can't either, but...
1712
01:30:27,922 --> 01:30:31,551
This whole trip, obviously,
you're taking the heat off me.
1713
01:30:31,551 --> 01:30:32,677
- Yeah.
- Um...
1714
01:30:33,845 --> 01:30:37,557
And that's just not the life
of a real trans person.
1715
01:30:37,557 --> 01:30:39,892
But when I was in the Goodwill today,
1716
01:30:39,892 --> 01:30:44,981
I just felt way more comfortable,
and that's a bit of a result of this trip.
1717
01:30:44,981 --> 01:30:46,524
- Yeah.
- For sure.
1718
01:30:46,524 --> 01:30:48,317
- Like...
- Another cocktail?
1719
01:30:48,317 --> 01:30:52,321
Yeah, I would love a,
uh... just a glass of... of Cab.
1720
01:30:53,489 --> 01:30:54,365
Thanks, John.
1721
01:30:56,117 --> 01:30:58,995
Okay,
it's a complicated subject for me.
1722
01:30:58,995 --> 01:31:01,414
Sometimes, the better my makeup looks,
1723
01:31:01,998 --> 01:31:03,833
the worse I feel about my face.
1724
01:31:03,833 --> 01:31:06,252
Well... But you look...
1725
01:31:08,296 --> 01:31:09,255
You look great.
1726
01:31:09,255 --> 01:31:14,385
But there's something about...
the slow process of getting
1727
01:31:15,553 --> 01:31:16,971
used to who I am...
1728
01:31:16,971 --> 01:31:17,889
Yeah.
1729
01:31:18,556 --> 01:31:22,143
...that the... "prettier" I get,
1730
01:31:22,852 --> 01:31:24,770
the more I see the flaws.
1731
01:31:24,770 --> 01:31:28,649
I know what you mean. It's like, "Okay,
I'm putting 'my best foot forward...'"
1732
01:31:28,649 --> 01:31:31,736
Right.
And I don't feel like I... I can-- Yeah.
1733
01:31:31,736 --> 01:31:33,821
It's making me very self-aware of my...
1734
01:31:33,821 --> 01:31:35,031
Right.
1735
01:31:35,031 --> 01:31:37,533
...unfortunately, very masculine face.
1736
01:31:37,533 --> 01:31:39,744
So I look in the mirror, and I--
1737
01:31:39,744 --> 01:31:42,955
- It's like this is getting closer.
- Yeah.
1738
01:31:42,955 --> 01:31:47,084
But now I'm like,
"Wow, I got a... I got more to do."
1739
01:31:47,627 --> 01:31:51,339
But having spent almost two weeks
with you now, I'm just like...
1740
01:31:53,174 --> 01:31:54,175
I'm just sorta like...
1741
01:31:55,676 --> 01:31:56,969
"I'm just with Harper."
1742
01:31:58,179 --> 01:31:59,639
I'm forgetting...
1743
01:32:00,556 --> 01:32:02,058
- The dead name?
- The dead name.
1744
01:32:02,642 --> 01:32:04,435
It's just getting fully...
1745
01:32:06,145 --> 01:32:09,440
replaced, and I don't... I don't know.
1746
01:32:09,440 --> 01:32:10,399
I mean,
1747
01:32:12,026 --> 01:32:12,944
thanks.
1748
01:32:12,944 --> 01:32:17,823
Do you feel lucky sitting across the table
from someone who looks like this?
1749
01:32:19,075 --> 01:32:22,495
I feel very fortunate
to be sitting across the table
1750
01:32:22,495 --> 01:32:24,664
from Bette Midler's old manager.
1751
01:32:24,664 --> 01:32:26,123
- Old manager.
- Yeah.
1752
01:32:26,123 --> 01:32:29,085
- Do you think John-- Oh, here comes John.
- Okay, good.
1753
01:32:30,670 --> 01:32:32,421
You think John knows it's me?
1754
01:32:35,800 --> 01:32:38,302
- Nickel & Nickel Cabernet. Enjoy.
- Thanks, John.
1755
01:32:38,803 --> 01:32:39,804
My pleasure.
1756
01:32:40,638 --> 01:32:41,556
Mm.
1757
01:32:42,598 --> 01:32:45,476
John is suspicious. So just be honest.
1758
01:32:45,476 --> 01:32:47,979
- John's onto me.
- Yeah, John--
1759
01:33:06,956 --> 01:33:10,960
Imagine someone
who goes on a trip with a friend
1760
01:33:10,960 --> 01:33:12,795
and is up for anything and everything.
1761
01:33:12,795 --> 01:33:13,754
Stop.
1762
01:33:13,754 --> 01:33:16,799
And there's literally one thing
they wanna do.
1763
01:33:17,592 --> 01:33:20,595
- One fun thing. That's it.
- We've done so many good things.
1764
01:33:21,095 --> 01:33:23,764
One fun thing that they dreamed about,
1765
01:33:23,764 --> 01:33:25,558
that they journaled about.
1766
01:33:26,517 --> 01:33:29,186
You never said
you journaled about Dunkin' Donuts.
1767
01:33:29,186 --> 01:33:31,022
I did journal about Dunkin' Donuts.
1768
01:33:31,022 --> 01:33:32,231
"Dear journal..."
1769
01:33:32,231 --> 01:33:34,066
If I could go, today's the day.
1770
01:33:34,066 --> 01:33:36,277
"...I have discovered something called..."
1771
01:33:36,277 --> 01:33:39,655
"Something that's changed my life.
It's a place called Dunkin' Donuts."
1772
01:33:39,655 --> 01:33:42,116
"Each donut is my friend."
1773
01:33:42,116 --> 01:33:44,994
- No.
-"I finally found my... my place."
1774
01:33:53,044 --> 01:33:55,713
- Whew.
- This feels like a long way to go.
1775
01:33:57,965 --> 01:34:01,510
Are you okay? Want me to take the other--
1776
01:34:01,510 --> 01:34:04,055
Yeah, could you carry all this?
1777
01:34:04,055 --> 01:34:06,432
Oof!
1778
01:34:19,111 --> 01:34:23,199
So... there's a few passages in my journal
1779
01:34:23,199 --> 01:34:26,243
that I just felt like
just talk to this very place.
1780
01:34:28,871 --> 01:34:30,748
11/27/15.
1781
01:34:32,166 --> 01:34:35,211
"Here we go into another holiday season
of uncertainty."
1782
01:34:36,420 --> 01:34:38,673
"Suicidal thoughts, regrets,
1783
01:34:39,173 --> 01:34:43,636
manic daydreams of a safe life
in small hidden houses away from the world
1784
01:34:43,636 --> 01:34:45,971
where I can create and live in peace."
1785
01:34:47,640 --> 01:34:51,060
"I fantasize about owning
an apartment in Mojave, California."
1786
01:34:51,936 --> 01:34:54,438
"I'm fixated on moving to Mojave."
1787
01:34:55,481 --> 01:34:57,400
"I can't get it out of my mind."
1788
01:35:06,701 --> 01:35:09,704
"In December,
I found a house in Trona, California."
1789
01:35:10,454 --> 01:35:14,083
"It cost ten thousand dollars,
and I couldn't stop obsessing over it."
1790
01:35:15,376 --> 01:35:16,627
"I offered to buy it,
1791
01:35:16,627 --> 01:35:19,588
and now it looks like I will own it."
1792
01:35:21,257 --> 01:35:24,969
"My own space to dress like a woman,
walk around like a woman."
1793
01:35:25,970 --> 01:35:27,304
"Miles from anyone."
1794
01:36:00,796 --> 01:36:03,007
How... how long have you had it?
1795
01:36:04,633 --> 01:36:09,430
I bought it about six or seven years ago.
1796
01:36:20,941 --> 01:36:22,318
Oh my God.
1797
01:36:22,860 --> 01:36:24,153
Yeah. Um...
1798
01:36:26,864 --> 01:36:29,200
And I just was looking for, uh...
1799
01:36:31,535 --> 01:36:33,329
some place to go where I could
1800
01:36:34,330 --> 01:36:35,998
get away from people and...
1801
01:36:37,500 --> 01:36:39,502
There's something I liked about this.
1802
01:36:41,003 --> 01:36:44,381
That it was just so...
so far away from everything else?
1803
01:36:44,381 --> 01:36:47,384
Yeah, it was just hidden
in a downtrodden community, and...
1804
01:36:47,384 --> 01:36:48,302
Yeah.
1805
01:36:49,553 --> 01:36:50,554
I felt I...
1806
01:36:52,848 --> 01:36:54,016
kinda fit in out here.
1807
01:36:54,016 --> 01:36:54,934
Mm-hmm.
1808
01:36:56,268 --> 01:36:57,394
Because...
1809
01:37:03,734 --> 01:37:05,110
Yeah.
1810
01:37:05,945 --> 01:37:06,779
I just...
1811
01:37:08,489 --> 01:37:10,407
I just hated myself so much.
1812
01:37:21,919 --> 01:37:22,878
Fuck.
1813
01:37:23,462 --> 01:37:25,047
I just felt like a monster.
1814
01:37:27,341 --> 01:37:29,260
- I fucking hated it.
- It's okay.
1815
01:37:29,760 --> 01:37:32,221
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it is okay.
1816
01:37:32,221 --> 01:37:33,764
- Everything's okay.
- Yeah.
1817
01:37:34,473 --> 01:37:35,975
Yeah, so...
1818
01:37:36,725 --> 01:37:38,143
...I-- I kind of fancied,
1819
01:37:38,143 --> 01:37:41,981
um, a mid-century modern house out here,
and I would go to town on it.
1820
01:37:43,357 --> 01:37:47,695
And I'll show you inside, and you'll see
how it got vandalized.
1821
01:38:26,108 --> 01:38:27,818
I don't want...
1822
01:38:27,818 --> 01:38:30,029
I just don't want anything to do with it.
1823
01:38:31,196 --> 01:38:34,158
I was just gonna say,
what's... what's the plan now?
1824
01:38:34,700 --> 01:38:36,577
- Give it to somebody?
- Uh-huh.
1825
01:38:38,621 --> 01:38:40,289
I know it's, um...
1826
01:38:42,124 --> 01:38:43,584
I mean, I was gonna be a woman here.
1827
01:38:43,584 --> 01:38:45,836
That was it. I was gonna--
That was my plan.
1828
01:38:45,836 --> 01:38:48,589
I had no... There wasn't any way
to make it work either,
1829
01:38:48,589 --> 01:38:51,050
because I would've been afraid
of these people, too,
1830
01:38:51,050 --> 01:38:54,803
so I just was gonna close the curtains
and walk around this house,
1831
01:38:54,803 --> 01:38:56,805
and it was a safe space.
1832
01:38:56,805 --> 01:38:59,975
- Were you able to ever, like, dress here...?
- Yeah. I mean, this was--
1833
01:38:59,975 --> 01:39:03,145
- I worked in there in women's clothes.
- Yeah.
1834
01:39:03,145 --> 01:39:05,147
And I brought women's clothes with me,
1835
01:39:05,147 --> 01:39:09,068
and I... sat out here at night
in women's clothes.
1836
01:39:09,568 --> 01:39:11,362
I... I... I loved it.
1837
01:39:12,404 --> 01:39:16,367
But it just is not the path.
It's just not the way to do it.
1838
01:39:16,367 --> 01:39:18,661
It's not the-- You can't hide. It's not--
1839
01:39:18,661 --> 01:39:20,996
It catches up with you,
and it's just stupid.
1840
01:39:20,996 --> 01:39:23,666
And I don't wanna be
afraid of people anymore.
1841
01:39:23,666 --> 01:39:26,335
That's just sad and terrible.
1842
01:39:28,087 --> 01:39:30,255
- Yeah, I get to be in the world.
- Yeah.
1843
01:39:30,255 --> 01:39:31,924
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah, right.
1844
01:39:31,924 --> 01:39:33,050
And, also, like...
1845
01:39:36,136 --> 01:39:38,931
I don't have to lie to you anymore.
You know what I mean?
1846
01:39:38,931 --> 01:39:41,558
- Right.
- You're like, "Oh, you got a crazy house."
1847
01:39:41,558 --> 01:39:43,519
Yeah, it's my little thing I'm doing.
1848
01:39:43,519 --> 01:39:45,729
There's always a lie under there,
and I don't like that.
1849
01:39:45,729 --> 01:39:47,898
Yeah, I don't like
lying to my friends at all.
1850
01:39:47,898 --> 01:39:50,609
- And here you are.
- I know.
1851
01:39:50,609 --> 01:39:54,196
One of my really good friends,
and I just was lying to...
1852
01:39:54,196 --> 01:39:55,322
And I don't-- I don't--
1853
01:39:55,322 --> 01:39:57,741
Again, it's not the worst thing
that I was trying to be safe
1854
01:39:57,741 --> 01:40:00,953
'cause I didn't know how people
were gonna react. I was scared.
1855
01:40:01,578 --> 01:40:04,331
But no, I don't...
I don't want to do that anymore. I can...
1856
01:40:05,666 --> 01:40:09,294
I can-- I have a few secrets
that I'm not gonna let you have.
1857
01:40:09,294 --> 01:40:10,671
Okay?
1858
01:40:10,671 --> 01:40:13,799
Like, I-- There's some record places
that I'll never tell you about.
1859
01:40:14,717 --> 01:40:17,553
- I'll get it outta you.
- No, you won't. That's secret.
1860
01:40:17,553 --> 01:40:18,637
And, uh...
1861
01:40:21,557 --> 01:40:23,767
I stole something
from your house one time.
1862
01:40:24,768 --> 01:40:26,061
I already know what it is.
1863
01:40:26,061 --> 01:40:27,896
Oh.
1864
01:40:27,896 --> 01:40:30,149
You are a good friend.
1865
01:40:34,695 --> 01:40:36,905
Uh,
should we go do some fireworks?
1866
01:40:40,784 --> 01:40:44,997
♪ Someway, baby, it's part of me
Apart from me... ♪
1867
01:40:45,831 --> 01:40:48,792
- Oh boy! Gimme your lighter.
- This is exciting.
1868
01:40:48,792 --> 01:40:51,378
- I'm gonna just gonna place this here.
- Okay.
1869
01:40:51,378 --> 01:40:54,256
- ♪ You're laying waste to Halloween... ♪
- Okay.
1870
01:40:56,925 --> 01:40:58,218
Oh!
1871
01:40:58,218 --> 01:40:59,470
Not toward me!
1872
01:40:59,470 --> 01:41:02,848
- Whoa! Oh!
- Ah!
1873
01:41:06,477 --> 01:41:08,395
Whoa-oh-oh-oh!
1874
01:41:11,023 --> 01:41:12,691
Gator Gun! Gator Gun!
1875
01:41:12,691 --> 01:41:14,318
- Gator Gun!
- Gator Gun!
1876
01:41:15,194 --> 01:41:18,447
- Gator Gun! Gator Gun!
- Gator Gun! Yeah!
1877
01:41:18,447 --> 01:41:20,741
Take that! Gator Gun!
1878
01:41:21,450 --> 01:41:23,285
Gator Gun!
1879
01:41:24,912 --> 01:41:28,040
♪ Saying nothing, that's enough for me ♪
1880
01:41:33,045 --> 01:41:35,506
♪ And at once, I knew ♪
1881
01:41:36,340 --> 01:41:39,968
♪ I was not magnificent... ♪
1882
01:41:47,226 --> 01:41:50,729
♪ But I could see
For miles, miles, miles ♪
1883
01:42:10,833 --> 01:42:12,751
Oh-oh. Ah!
1884
01:42:13,460 --> 01:42:15,170
- Uh!
- What? What?
1885
01:42:16,255 --> 01:42:18,715
- You-- It's our last day.
- Yeah.
1886
01:42:19,675 --> 01:42:22,177
- I'm not seeing what you're seeing.
- What does that say?
1887
01:42:22,177 --> 01:42:23,762
Over there? "Dunkin' Donuts."
1888
01:42:23,762 --> 01:42:27,975
I think this trip was stupid if we didn't...
if we don't get to go to Dunkin' Donuts.
1889
01:42:27,975 --> 01:42:31,436
- You gotta be kidding. Jesus.
- I think this whole trip was stupid.
1890
01:42:31,436 --> 01:42:33,313
There, I said it.
You wanted me to be honest.
1891
01:42:34,356 --> 01:42:35,190
Okay.
1892
01:42:36,316 --> 01:42:37,901
Okay, here we go.
1893
01:42:39,194 --> 01:42:40,654
- Guess what?
- Wait.
1894
01:42:40,654 --> 01:42:42,364
- Yes.
- Are you really?
1895
01:42:42,364 --> 01:42:43,282
Yes.
1896
01:42:45,492 --> 01:42:47,911
What can I get started for you?
1897
01:42:47,911 --> 01:42:52,374
What do you like more?
Your classic donut or Munchkins?
1898
01:42:52,374 --> 01:42:54,668
- Do you have apple fritters?
- I do!
1899
01:42:56,461 --> 01:42:57,629
Order something!
1900
01:42:57,629 --> 01:42:58,922
I need more time.
1901
01:42:58,922 --> 01:43:00,174
- No!
- No!
1902
01:43:00,799 --> 01:43:02,885
Just a... a classic glazed.
1903
01:43:02,885 --> 01:43:05,470
- Well, are you fucking happy? Come on.
- Yeah.
1904
01:43:05,971 --> 01:43:09,308
- I'm gonna pull over so you can just eat.
- Oh my God.
1905
01:43:09,308 --> 01:43:10,225
Mmm!
1906
01:43:10,851 --> 01:43:12,394
- And you know what?
- Yeah.
1907
01:43:12,394 --> 01:43:14,271
They're nice and cold.
1908
01:43:15,272 --> 01:43:17,232
- It's great.
- 3,000 miles.
1909
01:43:17,232 --> 01:43:18,192
Really great.
1910
01:43:20,319 --> 01:43:21,778
Is-- How's the trip now?
1911
01:43:22,613 --> 01:43:25,365
It's... honestly, it's, like,
the best trip I've ever had.
1912
01:43:28,869 --> 01:43:30,579
It's been a really good trip.
1913
01:43:34,583 --> 01:43:37,294
♪ I pulled into Nazareth ♪
1914
01:43:37,294 --> 01:43:40,255
♪ Was feeling 'bout half past dead ♪
1915
01:43:41,256 --> 01:43:43,467
♪ I just need some place ♪
1916
01:43:44,051 --> 01:43:45,719
♪ Where I can lay my... ♪
1917
01:43:45,719 --> 01:43:46,637
Harper!
1918
01:43:47,930 --> 01:43:49,765
- Oh my goodness!
- So good to see you.
1919
01:43:49,765 --> 01:43:51,225
Good to see you!
1920
01:43:52,893 --> 01:43:58,023
Harper and Will, what... what has been
the best part of the trip, would you say?
1921
01:43:59,900 --> 01:44:02,277
Boy, we've had some great--
We've had a lot.
1922
01:44:02,778 --> 01:44:06,114
Was there anything you learned about Will
that you didn't know,
1923
01:44:06,114 --> 01:44:09,034
or, Will, that you learned about Harper
that you didn't know?
1924
01:44:09,785 --> 01:44:11,745
For me, I had no idea
1925
01:44:11,745 --> 01:44:16,458
the kind of... the despair that Harper felt
for so long, you know? It's like...
1926
01:44:16,458 --> 01:44:19,503
- Mm-hmm.
- And she hid it really well. She hid it.
1927
01:44:20,337 --> 01:44:21,171
Um...
1928
01:44:23,131 --> 01:44:25,092
What I really learned about Will...
1929
01:44:25,717 --> 01:44:28,720
Like, we've been friends for 27 years,
you know?
1930
01:44:29,596 --> 01:44:30,430
But...
1931
01:44:33,684 --> 01:44:35,185
Yeah. I mean...
1932
01:44:38,814 --> 01:44:41,900
I mean, he loves me.
You know what I mean?
1933
01:44:41,900 --> 01:44:44,027
He's watched me now break down.
1934
01:44:44,027 --> 01:44:48,198
I've watched that, what'd you call,
bag of cement break down too.
1935
01:44:50,826 --> 01:44:52,703
And... I don't know, it just...
1936
01:44:54,413 --> 01:44:56,665
He cared so much about this.
1937
01:44:57,874 --> 01:44:59,835
And cared about
1938
01:45:01,169 --> 01:45:03,630
making sure that I wasn't in pain and...
1939
01:45:04,756 --> 01:45:06,258
It just... Yeah.
1940
01:45:06,258 --> 01:45:08,593
I just... It was very sweet for me.
1941
01:45:10,220 --> 01:45:11,305
Yeah.
1942
01:45:11,305 --> 01:45:13,432
- That's amazing.
- Yeah.
1943
01:45:15,309 --> 01:45:17,019
Will, what color are you gonna go with?
1944
01:45:17,019 --> 01:45:17,936
Green.
1945
01:45:17,936 --> 01:45:22,065
Going with the color
of the homeland, the Emerald Isle.
1946
01:45:22,065 --> 01:45:25,319
- So beautiful.
- I love that, for St. Paddy's Day.
1947
01:45:42,544 --> 01:45:46,631
God, what do we say? You don't wanna,
like, upset the artistic process.
1948
01:45:46,631 --> 01:45:49,426
- Call has been forwarded to...
- God!
1949
01:45:50,469 --> 01:45:52,763
At the tone, please record your message.
1950
01:45:53,472 --> 01:45:55,640
Hi, Kristen.
1951
01:45:55,640 --> 01:45:59,102
It's Will and Harper, and we're, uh...
1952
01:45:59,686 --> 01:46:02,481
Gosh, we've almost
officially made it across country.
1953
01:46:02,481 --> 01:46:05,650
We're gonna go down
to the beach here, and, uh...
1954
01:46:06,318 --> 01:46:08,028
- Well, we're just checking in.
- Yeah.
1955
01:46:08,028 --> 01:46:09,780
Hey, anything you wanna send us
1956
01:46:09,780 --> 01:46:13,075
in the next anywhere from two
to eight minutes would be great.
1957
01:46:14,493 --> 01:46:16,661
- Look at that. There it is.
- Yeah! Yeah!
1958
01:46:16,661 --> 01:46:18,330
- The ocean.
- Beautiful.
1959
01:46:21,333 --> 01:46:23,460
- It does feel good, right?
- Yeah.
1960
01:46:23,460 --> 01:46:26,630
- I mean, it's a long drive.
- Yeah. I know.
1961
01:46:26,630 --> 01:46:27,798
You know?
1962
01:46:30,801 --> 01:46:31,635
Oh!
1963
01:46:32,719 --> 01:46:33,970
- Wow.
- That's great.
1964
01:46:38,767 --> 01:46:41,603
We've dropped these chairs
in some very nice places, haven't we?
1965
01:46:41,603 --> 01:46:43,271
- Yeah.
- The Grand Canyon.
1966
01:46:43,271 --> 01:46:45,148
- Yep.
- The Mississippi River.
1967
01:46:45,148 --> 01:46:46,358
Mighty Mississippi.
1968
01:46:46,858 --> 01:46:49,069
On a-- In a Walmart parking lot.
1969
01:46:53,448 --> 01:46:55,659
- I will never forget this.
- Yeah.
1970
01:46:55,659 --> 01:46:57,661
We'll never forget this trip.
1971
01:46:59,121 --> 01:47:03,667
Because if it's in a week
or six months from now...
1972
01:47:03,667 --> 01:47:04,584
Yeah.
1973
01:47:06,586 --> 01:47:07,838
...the joy...
1974
01:47:07,838 --> 01:47:08,797
Yeah.
1975
01:47:09,464 --> 01:47:12,342
...the joy I'm gonna feel just seeing you.
1976
01:47:12,342 --> 01:47:17,889
Which I always felt, but it's like,
man, I really got close to my friend Will.
1977
01:47:18,557 --> 01:47:20,058
- I still...
- Yeah.
1978
01:47:20,058 --> 01:47:23,687
I'm gonna think of something tomorrow
that I forgot to ask you.
1979
01:47:23,687 --> 01:47:26,189
I'm gonna think
of a bunch of stuff I should've said
1980
01:47:26,189 --> 01:47:27,691
that I wanted to tell you.
1981
01:47:28,275 --> 01:47:29,651
- But...
- We have time.
1982
01:47:29,651 --> 01:47:32,028
- We have time and...
- I mean, yeah.
1983
01:47:37,868 --> 01:47:39,494
I got you a little present.
1984
01:47:41,246 --> 01:47:42,581
- You did?
- Yeah.
1985
01:47:43,707 --> 01:47:44,708
Because one of...
1986
01:47:45,500 --> 01:47:48,962
We've obviously had
this back-and-forth on beauty.
1987
01:47:48,962 --> 01:47:49,880
Yeah.
1988
01:47:50,464 --> 01:47:53,508
- And... being okay with--
- Yeah.
1989
01:47:54,551 --> 01:47:55,927
With kind of, you know...
1990
01:47:57,804 --> 01:48:01,183
Whether it's makeup
or finding the right dress, it... it--
1991
01:48:01,183 --> 01:48:05,770
making yourself feel good
as a woman, beautiful.
1992
01:48:06,646 --> 01:48:09,441
So... I thought to myself,
1993
01:48:09,441 --> 01:48:12,277
"I know what I wanna get Harper
at the end of the thing."
1994
01:48:13,987 --> 01:48:15,739
Her own pair of diamond earrings.
1995
01:48:15,739 --> 01:48:18,325
- Not diamond earrings. Really?
- Yeah.
1996
01:48:21,912 --> 01:48:23,371
Oh my God.
1997
01:48:25,332 --> 01:48:26,166
So...
1998
01:48:29,377 --> 01:48:30,212
Just to...
1999
01:48:32,672 --> 01:48:35,383
Just as kind of obviously
a memory of the trip,
2000
01:48:35,383 --> 01:48:37,260
but just, like, it's okay to...
2001
01:48:39,095 --> 01:48:42,766
It's okay to feel pretty
and do nice, pretty things for yourself.
2002
01:48:44,100 --> 01:48:45,810
Oh jeez.
2003
01:48:53,193 --> 01:48:55,195
I don't-- Jeez.
2004
01:48:55,779 --> 01:48:58,073
It's just so cool.
2005
01:48:58,073 --> 01:49:00,283
It's just so sweet.
2006
01:49:00,283 --> 01:49:02,702
You know?
2007
01:49:02,702 --> 01:49:04,037
This is very special.
2008
01:49:05,038 --> 01:49:07,207
- I'm going in. I'm going in!
- Whoa!
2009
01:49:11,586 --> 01:49:13,088
Hey, it's pretty good!
2010
01:49:15,590 --> 01:49:16,424
Dolores.
2011
01:49:17,926 --> 01:49:18,843
Cornelius.
2012
01:49:20,053 --> 01:49:21,096
So what's next?
2013
01:49:22,806 --> 01:49:23,807
For me,
2014
01:49:25,183 --> 01:49:27,310
tomorrow, I'm running it back.
2015
01:49:27,310 --> 01:49:30,564
I gotta get back to New York,
so I'm gonna drive back across.
2016
01:49:31,481 --> 01:49:33,191
What are you doing, by the way?
2017
01:49:33,775 --> 01:49:36,361
I've literally got nothing.
I'm wide open.
2018
01:49:37,070 --> 01:49:40,031
- You wanna go back with me?
- Yeah, let's just run it back.
2019
01:49:40,031 --> 01:49:42,200
- Take a new route.
- New route. Great.
2020
01:49:42,784 --> 01:49:44,244
- I got a lot of ideas.
- Yeah.
2021
01:49:44,244 --> 01:49:47,038
- I got some fun places to stop.
- I can't wait.
2022
01:49:47,622 --> 01:49:48,957
♪ Take a ride ♪
2023
01:49:50,083 --> 01:49:52,919
♪ Let us see now what goes on inside ♪
2024
01:49:53,962 --> 01:49:56,590
♪ Let's reveal what others try to hide ♪
2025
01:49:57,882 --> 01:50:00,468
♪ Baby, go with me ♪
2026
01:50:01,344 --> 01:50:03,638
♪ I love you, baby ♪
2027
01:50:03,638 --> 01:50:05,390
♪ Take my hand ♪
2028
01:50:06,182 --> 01:50:09,185
♪ I'm afraid to travel through this land ♪
2029
01:50:10,145 --> 01:50:12,897
♪ I'm afraid that I won't understand ♪
2030
01:50:13,940 --> 01:50:16,610
♪ Baby, take my hand ♪
2031
01:50:17,527 --> 01:50:19,362
♪ I love you, baby ♪
2032
01:50:19,362 --> 01:50:23,408
- ♪ Stay... ♪
- Hey, it's Kristen. Um, I...
2033
01:50:24,284 --> 01:50:27,078
I think
I finished the song? Um...
2034
01:50:27,704 --> 01:50:30,957
And, oh my gosh, I... I hope you like it.
2035
01:50:32,375 --> 01:50:33,418
Okay, here it is.
2036
01:50:39,549 --> 01:50:42,636
{\an8}♪ Harper and Will go west ♪
2037
01:50:43,928 --> 01:50:46,097
{\an8}♪ Just a couple old friends ♪
2038
01:50:46,097 --> 01:50:48,892
{\an8}♪ And a couple brand-new breasts ♪
2039
01:50:48,892 --> 01:50:51,770
{\an8}♪ They're off to see America ♪
2040
01:50:51,770 --> 01:50:54,314
{\an8}♪ Not sure what they'll find ♪
2041
01:50:54,314 --> 01:50:56,941
{\an8}♪ Open to the open road ♪
2042
01:50:56,941 --> 01:50:58,860
{\an8}♪ Only to be reminded ♪
2043
01:50:58,860 --> 01:51:03,114
{\an8}♪ That a friend is a friend is a friend ♪
2044
01:51:03,948 --> 01:51:05,283
{\an8}♪ Till the end ♪
2045
01:51:08,620 --> 01:51:10,580
{\an8}♪ Coast-to-coast ♪
2046
01:51:11,623 --> 01:51:15,877
{\an8}♪ Takes 3,000 miles to get this close ♪
2047
01:51:17,087 --> 01:51:18,963
{\an8}♪ Did Lewis and Clark ♪
2048
01:51:18,963 --> 01:51:23,551
{\an8}♪ Dare to go to these emotional places? ♪
2049
01:51:23,551 --> 01:51:26,137
{\an8}♪ This is a greater unknown ♪
2050
01:51:26,137 --> 01:51:29,599
{\an8}♪ So I think my two are the bravest ♪
2051
01:51:29,599 --> 01:51:32,686
{\an8}♪ Harper and Will go west ♪
2052
01:51:34,020 --> 01:51:36,147
{\an8}♪ Like Thelma and Louise ♪
2053
01:51:36,147 --> 01:51:38,942
{\an8}♪ But with a lot less death ♪
2054
01:51:38,942 --> 01:51:41,736
{\an8}♪ They're off to see America ♪
2055
01:51:41,736 --> 01:51:43,905
{\an8}♪ Just one girl and a guy ♪
2056
01:51:44,531 --> 01:51:46,741
{\an8}♪ Open to the open road ♪
2057
01:51:46,741 --> 01:51:48,868
{\an8}♪ Only to be reminded ♪
2058
01:51:48,868 --> 01:51:53,665
{\an8}♪ That a friend is a friend is a friend ♪
2059
01:51:54,249 --> 01:51:55,417
{\an8}♪ Till the end ♪
2060
01:51:58,378 --> 01:52:00,588
{\an8}♪ They'll find their way ♪
2061
01:52:01,923 --> 01:52:05,635
{\an8}♪ Even when they don't know what to say ♪
2062
01:52:06,386 --> 01:52:10,223
{\an8}♪ Known each other for forever and a day ♪
2063
01:52:10,223 --> 01:52:13,268
{\an8}♪ On a path to find themselves ♪
2064
01:52:14,060 --> 01:52:16,062
{\an8}♪ A magical woman ♪
2065
01:52:16,062 --> 01:52:18,898
{\an8}♪ Riding with her grown-up elf ♪
2066
01:52:18,898 --> 01:52:23,611
{\an8}♪ And, ooh, this is the jazzy part ♪
2067
01:52:23,611 --> 01:52:28,908
{\an8}♪ I assume there's no room in the car ♪
2068
01:52:28,908 --> 01:52:34,247
{\an8}♪ For me, or I'd have been invited ♪
2069
01:52:34,247 --> 01:52:36,833
{\an8}♪ But I'll play my part ♪
2070
01:52:36,833 --> 01:52:39,961
{\an8}♪ This one's from the heart ♪
2071
01:52:39,961 --> 01:52:42,797
{\an8}♪ Harper and Will go west ♪
2072
01:52:44,591 --> 01:52:46,593
{\an8}♪ Not prospecting for gold ♪
2073
01:52:46,593 --> 01:52:49,304
{\an8}♪ This is a richer quest ♪
2074
01:52:49,304 --> 01:52:52,307
{\an8}♪ They're off to see America ♪
2075
01:52:52,307 --> 01:52:54,893
{\an8}♪ Follow their own signs ♪
2076
01:52:54,893 --> 01:52:57,228
{\an8}♪ Open to the open road ♪
2077
01:52:57,228 --> 01:52:59,272
{\an8}♪ Only to be reminded ♪
2078
01:52:59,272 --> 01:53:04,652
{\an8}♪ That a friend is a friend
Is a friend is a friend ♪
2079
01:53:04,652 --> 01:53:09,115
{\an8}♪ A friend is a friend is a friend ♪
2080
01:53:09,115 --> 01:53:10,950
{\an8}♪ Till the end ♪
2081
01:53:14,329 --> 01:53:15,914
{\an8}♪ Till the end ♪
2082
01:53:22,629 --> 01:53:25,590
- You may wanna get into the lane.
- What lane am I in?
2083
01:53:25,590 --> 01:53:28,426
{\an8}- Yeah, you're in-- Yes.
- Thank you. Thank you very much.