1 00:00:02,168 --> 00:00:05,170 Oh, Drake. I'm sorry, Amber. 2 00:00:05,380 --> 00:00:07,923 It's just like Brad to have to have the last word. 3 00:00:08,967 --> 00:00:12,052 - I'm sorry I'm late. What happened? - We wanna see the end. 4 00:00:12,220 --> 00:00:15,014 - I want you, Drake. - I know you do. 5 00:00:15,181 --> 00:00:17,349 But you and I can never be together that way. 6 00:00:17,976 --> 00:00:21,145 - What? - There's something I never told you. 7 00:00:21,312 --> 00:00:24,231 I'm actually your half-brother. 8 00:00:24,399 --> 00:00:26,191 - What? - Huh? 9 00:00:29,529 --> 00:00:31,196 So, what happens next? 10 00:00:31,364 --> 00:00:34,867 Well, I get the medical award for separating the Siamese twins. 11 00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:39,329 Then Amber and I go to Venezuela to meet our other half-brother, Ramon... 12 00:00:40,540 --> 00:00:44,334 ...and that's where I find the world's biggest emerald. It's really big. 13 00:00:44,502 --> 00:00:45,794 But it's cursed. 14 00:00:47,213 --> 00:00:50,007 - So cool! - God, that is good TV. 15 00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:42,017 - Pheebs, play with me! - No! 16 00:01:42,185 --> 00:01:43,560 This game is grotesque. 17 00:01:43,770 --> 00:01:47,689 Twenty armless guys joined at the waist by a steel bar... 18 00:01:48,024 --> 00:01:51,276 ...forced to play soccer forever? Ugh! 19 00:01:51,444 --> 00:01:53,654 Hello? Human rights violation. 20 00:01:54,447 --> 00:01:56,698 Don't feel so bad. After they're done playing... 21 00:01:56,866 --> 00:02:01,036 ...I break out the plastic women and everybody has a pretty good time. 22 00:02:02,372 --> 00:02:04,248 Why don't you play with your roommate? 23 00:02:04,415 --> 00:02:06,041 Eh, he's, uh... 24 00:02:06,209 --> 00:02:08,168 He's not a big fan of foosball. 25 00:02:08,336 --> 00:02:11,130 Uh-oh. Ooh. Are we not getting along with the new boy? 26 00:02:11,297 --> 00:02:15,259 No, he's all right. He just, uh, spends most of his time in his room. 27 00:02:15,426 --> 00:02:18,053 Maybe because you haven't taken time to get to know him. 28 00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:19,805 Let's remedy that, shall we? 29 00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:23,058 - We don't need to remedy that. - Oh, yeah, it'll be fun! 30 00:02:25,645 --> 00:02:27,563 - What was that? - Hi! 31 00:02:27,730 --> 00:02:30,482 Um, I thought it'd be fun if the three of us had beers... 32 00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:32,192 ...and got to know each other. 33 00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:35,487 - All right. That sounds all right. - Oh, good! Okay. 34 00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:40,200 Oh, no, I have to go, because I'm late for my, um... 35 00:02:40,368 --> 00:02:42,452 ...Green Eggs and Ham discussion group. 36 00:02:43,538 --> 00:02:47,541 Um, tonight, it's "Why he would not eat them on a train. " 37 00:02:48,042 --> 00:02:50,210 - Have fun! Bye! - That was so lame. 38 00:02:50,378 --> 00:02:52,337 I know. Yeah, heh. 39 00:02:52,505 --> 00:02:54,798 - Okay, talk to him. - Ahem. 40 00:02:57,844 --> 00:03:02,973 So you, uh, think that Speed Racer guy gets a lot of tickets or? 41 00:03:05,059 --> 00:03:07,769 Ha-ha-ha. That's good. So who broke up with who? 42 00:03:07,937 --> 00:03:09,688 You kidding? I broke up with her. 43 00:03:09,939 --> 00:03:13,525 She actually thought Sean Penn was the capital of Cambodia. 44 00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:18,155 When everybody knows that the, uh, capital of Cambodia is... 45 00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:20,115 Is, uh... 46 00:03:20,283 --> 00:03:22,534 It's not Sean Penn. 47 00:03:22,702 --> 00:03:24,995 All right, I got a funny one. All right? 48 00:03:25,163 --> 00:03:27,956 My last girlfriend, Tilly. We're eating breakfast, right? 49 00:03:28,166 --> 00:03:30,500 I made these pancakes. Like, 50 pancakes. 50 00:03:30,752 --> 00:03:33,837 All of a sudden, she turns to me and says, "Eddie... 51 00:03:34,047 --> 00:03:36,048 ...I don't wanna see you anymore. " Ha, ha. 52 00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:39,092 It was literally like she had reached into my chest... 53 00:03:39,344 --> 00:03:42,679 ...ripped out my heart and smeared it all over my life! 54 00:03:43,848 --> 00:03:46,767 There was this incredible abyss and I'm falling. 55 00:03:47,018 --> 00:03:49,728 I keep falling and I don't think I'm ever gonna stop! 56 00:03:55,026 --> 00:03:57,027 That wasn't such a funny story, was it? 57 00:04:02,784 --> 00:04:05,285 And a crusty old man Said I'll do what I can 58 00:04:05,453 --> 00:04:07,746 And the rest of the rats Played maracas 59 00:04:10,416 --> 00:04:12,626 That's it! Thanks! Good night. 60 00:04:14,379 --> 00:04:16,463 - Phoebe's got another job, right? - Heh. 61 00:04:17,840 --> 00:04:19,675 Great set tonight, Pheebs. Yes. 62 00:04:19,842 --> 00:04:20,968 I know. 63 00:04:21,970 --> 00:04:23,887 - We should get going. - Mm. 64 00:04:24,055 --> 00:04:26,848 We should too. I've got patients at 8 in the morning. 65 00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:29,309 You know how we always stay at your apartment? 66 00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:31,770 I thought tonight we'd stay at my place. 67 00:04:32,313 --> 00:04:34,523 I don't know. I don't have my jammies. 68 00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:35,857 Heh. 69 00:04:36,025 --> 00:04:37,359 You don't need them. 70 00:04:37,902 --> 00:04:40,445 My baby sister, ladies and gentlemen. 71 00:04:42,198 --> 00:04:43,282 Shut up. I'm happy. 72 00:04:45,368 --> 00:04:48,245 Oh, this is so nice! I have to make a speech. 73 00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:49,788 Ahem. I just want to say... 74 00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:53,542 ...of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot... 75 00:04:55,878 --> 00:04:58,588 ...I like you the best. - Aw. 76 00:04:58,756 --> 00:05:01,425 Thank you, Pheebs. That's very sweet. 77 00:05:01,926 --> 00:05:03,093 You hear that? 78 00:05:03,344 --> 00:05:06,847 She likes me best. And apparently, there have been a lot. 79 00:05:08,599 --> 00:05:09,766 Not a lot. 80 00:05:10,018 --> 00:05:12,477 Phoebe's kidding. Phoebe's crazy. 81 00:05:14,230 --> 00:05:16,023 Phoebe's dead. 82 00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:23,030 - Hi. - Hi. 83 00:05:23,197 --> 00:05:24,740 I'm looking for Eddie Manoick. 84 00:05:24,907 --> 00:05:27,617 Oh, uh, he's not here right now. I'm Chandler. 85 00:05:27,869 --> 00:05:30,704 Can I take a message or... Or a fish tank? 86 00:05:30,913 --> 00:05:32,080 Thanks. 87 00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:33,957 Come on in. 88 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,375 I'm Tilly. 89 00:05:40,506 --> 00:05:41,548 Oh. 90 00:05:41,716 --> 00:05:44,509 I gather by that "Oh," he told you about me. 91 00:05:44,719 --> 00:05:47,554 Yeah, your, uh, name came up... 92 00:05:47,805 --> 00:05:51,266 ...in a conversation that terrified me to my very soul. 93 00:05:52,685 --> 00:05:54,061 He's kind of intense, huh? 94 00:05:54,270 --> 00:05:57,064 Yes! Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little... 95 00:05:57,273 --> 00:05:59,941 - A little what? ... bit country? 96 00:06:03,112 --> 00:06:04,404 Come on in, you roomie! 97 00:06:05,615 --> 00:06:06,907 Hello, Tilly. 98 00:06:07,158 --> 00:06:09,576 Eddie, I just came by to drop off your tank. 99 00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:11,953 That was very thoughtful of you. 100 00:06:12,163 --> 00:06:13,705 It's very thoughtful. 101 00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:19,586 Well, okay then. 102 00:06:20,296 --> 00:06:22,255 I'm gonna go. Bye. 103 00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:24,132 Bye. - Bye. 104 00:06:26,677 --> 00:06:27,886 So we getting a fish? 105 00:06:28,513 --> 00:06:30,597 You had sex with her, didn't you? 106 00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:35,727 Pheebs! Check it out, check it out! 107 00:06:35,937 --> 00:06:40,065 Oh, ooh, Soap Opera Digest! That's one of my favorite digests! 108 00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:43,860 - Page 42! Page 42! - Okay, okay. 109 00:06:44,028 --> 00:06:45,904 Okay. Ooh. Hey! 110 00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:48,949 "New Doc on the Block, Days ofour Lives Joey Tribbiani. " 111 00:06:49,117 --> 00:06:51,618 - Yeah. Yeah. - Oh, cool picture! 112 00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:54,037 - Ah. - Oh, I look good. 113 00:06:55,706 --> 00:06:59,000 Is this true? That you write a lot of your own lines? 114 00:06:59,669 --> 00:07:01,169 Well, kind of, yeah. 115 00:07:02,463 --> 00:07:05,340 Remember last week when Alex was in the accident? 116 00:07:05,591 --> 00:07:07,384 The line in the script was: 117 00:07:07,593 --> 00:07:11,054 "If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die. " 118 00:07:11,305 --> 00:07:14,307 But I made it, "If this woman doesn't get to a hospital... 119 00:07:14,517 --> 00:07:16,435 ...she's not gonna live. " 120 00:07:18,062 --> 00:07:21,523 Oh, okay. I see what you did there. 121 00:07:24,026 --> 00:07:28,029 Aren't you afraid the writers will be kind of mad when they read this? 122 00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:29,531 Huh. 123 00:07:29,699 --> 00:07:34,077 I never thought about the writers. The scripts just come to my house. 124 00:07:37,039 --> 00:07:38,415 But you know what? 125 00:07:38,624 --> 00:07:42,043 This makes me look good, which makes the show look good... 126 00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:45,964 ...which makes the writers look good. So how could they be mad? 127 00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:49,509 Makes up most of his lines. 128 00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:50,969 Son of a... 129 00:07:52,763 --> 00:07:55,724 Yeah. Write this, jerk-weed. 130 00:07:55,933 --> 00:07:57,684 I fall down an elevator shaft? 131 00:07:57,852 --> 00:08:00,854 What does this mean? I fall down an elevator shaft? 132 00:08:01,063 --> 00:08:04,524 Uh, I don't know. I just bring the scripts. 133 00:08:06,068 --> 00:08:09,488 They can't kill me! I'm Francesca's long-lost son! 134 00:08:09,655 --> 00:08:11,740 Right. 135 00:08:12,033 --> 00:08:13,700 Uh, could you sign? 136 00:08:13,951 --> 00:08:16,870 No! No way! I'm not signing that! 137 00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:20,373 I don't think that's gonna affect the plot of the show. 138 00:08:21,584 --> 00:08:23,793 How can they do this to me? 139 00:08:26,756 --> 00:08:29,132 All right, uh, I'm just gonna go. 140 00:08:29,842 --> 00:08:30,884 Sorry. 141 00:08:37,141 --> 00:08:39,226 Well, it wasn't that many guys. 142 00:08:39,477 --> 00:08:42,395 If you consider how many guys there actually are... 143 00:08:42,772 --> 00:08:45,148 ...it's a very small percentage. - Hey. 144 00:08:45,316 --> 00:08:48,109 It's not that big a deal. I was just curious. 145 00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:50,028 - Good night. - Good night, Richard. 146 00:08:50,279 --> 00:08:52,113 Good luck, Mon. 147 00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:56,576 All right, before I tell you, uh, you tell me how many women you've been with. 148 00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:03,041 - Two. - Two? Two? Heh. 149 00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:05,460 How is that possible? I mean... 150 00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:07,754 ...have you seen you? 151 00:09:08,923 --> 00:09:11,258 Well, I mean, what can I say? 152 00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:15,637 I was married to Barbara for 30 years, my high-school sweetheart. 153 00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:17,806 Now you. That's two. 154 00:09:18,516 --> 00:09:20,809 - Two it is. Heh. - Mm-hm. 155 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:23,311 Okay, time for bed. I'm gonna brush my teeth. 156 00:09:23,479 --> 00:09:26,022 Whoa, no, wait a minute now! 157 00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:27,983 Come on, it's your turn. 158 00:09:28,192 --> 00:09:30,026 Oh, come on! 159 00:09:31,279 --> 00:09:34,990 You know, I don't need the actual number. Just a ballpark. 160 00:09:36,450 --> 00:09:39,494 Okay, it is definitely less than a ballpark. 161 00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:46,710 Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now. 162 00:09:46,961 --> 00:09:48,670 Tell me about it. 163 00:09:48,879 --> 00:09:51,506 So, what's your magic number? 164 00:09:52,883 --> 00:09:54,050 Ahh... 165 00:09:54,218 --> 00:09:58,597 Come on, you know everyone I've been with. All both of them. 166 00:09:59,181 --> 00:10:01,516 Well, ahem, there's you. 167 00:10:02,018 --> 00:10:03,768 Better not be doing these in order. 168 00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:09,024 Okay, uh, Billy Dreskin, Pete Carny. 169 00:10:09,191 --> 00:10:10,859 - Ah. - Barry. 170 00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:13,153 And, uh, oh, Paolo. 171 00:10:13,321 --> 00:10:16,531 Oh, yes, the weenie from Turinie. 172 00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:21,953 Oh, honey, are you jealous of Paolo? 173 00:10:22,163 --> 00:10:25,790 I'm so much happier with you than I ever was with him. 174 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:28,043 - Really? - Oh, please. 175 00:10:28,294 --> 00:10:31,296 That Paolo thing was barely a relationship. 176 00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:35,216 All it really was was just meaningless, animal sex. 177 00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:44,059 Okay, you know, that sounded so much better in my head. 178 00:10:45,269 --> 00:10:47,437 Eddie! I didn't sleep with your ex-girlfriend. 179 00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:50,899 That's exactly what someone who slept with her would say. 180 00:10:51,067 --> 00:10:54,194 This is nuts! Crazy! She came over for two minutes... 181 00:10:54,362 --> 00:10:56,738 ...dropped off a fish tank and left! End of story. 182 00:10:56,906 --> 00:10:59,366 - Where's Buddy? - Buddy? 183 00:10:59,533 --> 00:11:01,159 My fish, Buddy. 184 00:11:02,203 --> 00:11:04,496 There was no fish when she dropped it off. 185 00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:06,414 Oh, this is unbelievable! 186 00:11:07,166 --> 00:11:11,169 You sleep with my ex-girlfriend, insult my intelligence by lying... 187 00:11:11,420 --> 00:11:13,338 ...then you kill my fish? My Buddy? 188 00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:15,382 I didn't kill your fish! 189 00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:17,425 Look, Eddie... 190 00:11:20,846 --> 00:11:23,056 Would you look at what I'm doing? 191 00:11:23,557 --> 00:11:25,058 Now that can't be smart. 192 00:11:28,646 --> 00:11:31,648 So we're just gonna take this guy right off you... 193 00:11:31,857 --> 00:11:34,317 ...and put him here in Mr. Pocket. 194 00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:37,737 Tangelo? 195 00:11:47,581 --> 00:11:50,709 That's it? That's the giant number you were afraid to tell me? 196 00:11:50,876 --> 00:11:53,962 - Well, yeah. - Well, that's not bad at all. 197 00:11:54,213 --> 00:11:56,881 You had me thinking it was, like, a fleet. 198 00:11:58,342 --> 00:11:59,426 You're okay with it? 199 00:11:59,593 --> 00:12:01,344 Oh, honey, I'm fine. 200 00:12:01,512 --> 00:12:02,679 Oh, yay! 201 00:12:06,016 --> 00:12:07,892 Okay, about that two. 202 00:12:08,310 --> 00:12:09,394 What? 203 00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:10,603 All right. 204 00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:12,647 What about my two? 205 00:12:12,857 --> 00:12:15,483 It just seems like a really small number. 206 00:12:15,693 --> 00:12:16,735 Right. 207 00:12:17,236 --> 00:12:19,362 - And? - And, well... 208 00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:22,490 Don't you have a lot of wild oats to sow? 209 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:27,495 Or is that what you're doing with me? Oh, my God! Am I an oat? 210 00:12:28,414 --> 00:12:30,123 Honey, you are not an oat. 211 00:12:30,374 --> 00:12:34,169 I don't know, I guess I'm just not an oat guy. 212 00:12:34,378 --> 00:12:36,337 I've only slept with women I love. 213 00:12:36,964 --> 00:12:38,757 You've only slept with two people. 214 00:12:43,721 --> 00:12:45,430 Right. 215 00:12:47,892 --> 00:12:49,184 Wow. 216 00:12:50,060 --> 00:12:51,853 Oh, wow. 217 00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:54,856 You know I love you too, right? 218 00:12:55,733 --> 00:12:57,358 Now I do. 219 00:13:01,530 --> 00:13:02,989 Ugh, Ross! 220 00:13:03,157 --> 00:13:04,699 Ross, please listen to me. 221 00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:09,078 Ross, you are so much better for me than Paolo ever was. 222 00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:12,373 You care about me, you're loving, you make me laugh. 223 00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:14,918 If I make you laugh, here's an idea. 224 00:13:15,085 --> 00:13:18,588 Invite Paolo to have a romp in the sack, and I'll stand in the corner... 225 00:13:18,756 --> 00:13:21,424 ...and tell knock-knock jokes. - Ross! Agh! 226 00:13:21,592 --> 00:13:24,010 God, Ross! 227 00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:27,263 What you and I have is special! All Paolo and I ever had was... 228 00:13:27,431 --> 00:13:28,681 Animal sex, animal sex? 229 00:13:32,019 --> 00:13:33,686 So, what are you saying? 230 00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:36,815 There's nothing between us "animal" at all? 231 00:13:37,066 --> 00:13:40,985 There's not even, like, um, a little animal? 232 00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:42,821 Not even, like... 233 00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:44,447 ...chipmunk sex? 234 00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:47,951 Okay, Ross... 235 00:13:48,202 --> 00:13:50,954 Try to hear me, okay? 236 00:13:51,121 --> 00:13:53,289 I... Hey. I'm not gonna lie to you. 237 00:13:53,916 --> 00:13:57,210 - It was good with Paolo. - Knock-knock. 238 00:13:59,463 --> 00:14:02,423 But what you and I have is so much better. 239 00:14:02,675 --> 00:14:07,011 We have tenderness, we have intimacy, we connect. 240 00:14:07,221 --> 00:14:08,680 You know? I swear. 241 00:14:08,931 --> 00:14:11,015 This is the best... 242 00:14:11,267 --> 00:14:13,935 ...I have ever had. 243 00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:17,522 - Until now. - Aah! 244 00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:24,904 - Oh, hi. - Hi. 245 00:14:25,155 --> 00:14:26,656 Richard told me he loved me. 246 00:14:26,907 --> 00:14:27,991 - Oh, my God! - I know! 247 00:14:28,242 --> 00:14:29,576 Honey, that's great! 248 00:14:29,785 --> 00:14:30,994 - I know! - Ha, ha. 249 00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:32,912 - I just can't find... - Top drawer. 250 00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:35,206 - Hurry. - Why? You need one too? 251 00:14:35,374 --> 00:14:37,792 Oh, yeah. 252 00:14:38,252 --> 00:14:40,336 - Found them! - Whoo. 253 00:14:44,216 --> 00:14:45,258 There's only one. 254 00:14:45,843 --> 00:14:48,219 - Monica! - Hi. 255 00:14:48,387 --> 00:14:52,473 Uh, we'll be right there. We're just trying to decide something. 256 00:14:56,103 --> 00:14:57,395 Rachel? 257 00:15:08,073 --> 00:15:09,908 - Hey. - Hey. 258 00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:13,953 - They're trying to decide something. - Good. Good, good. 259 00:15:20,252 --> 00:15:24,464 So is, um... So was your mustache... Did it used to be different? 260 00:15:26,884 --> 00:15:28,718 - No. - Oh. 261 00:15:31,555 --> 00:15:34,599 How do you, uh, you know, keep it so neat? 262 00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:38,686 - I have a little comb. - Oh. 263 00:15:42,232 --> 00:15:44,067 - What do you call that? - A mustache comb. 264 00:15:44,234 --> 00:15:45,652 Thank you. 265 00:15:47,029 --> 00:15:50,865 Okay, I will do your laundry for one month. 266 00:15:51,450 --> 00:15:53,242 - No! - Okay, okay! 267 00:15:53,410 --> 00:15:55,078 I will, I will, I will... 268 00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:57,956 I will clean the apartment for two months. 269 00:15:58,165 --> 00:16:02,460 I'll give this to you now, if you tell me where we keep the dustpan. 270 00:16:12,221 --> 00:16:13,846 So were you in Nam? 271 00:16:18,477 --> 00:16:20,687 - Rock, paper, scissors? - Gotcha. 272 00:16:21,271 --> 00:16:23,022 One, two, three. 273 00:16:23,273 --> 00:16:24,857 - Yes! - Agh! 274 00:16:25,025 --> 00:16:28,319 - Ah! - Fine. Go have sex. 275 00:16:30,781 --> 00:16:33,157 No! You have got it completely wrong! 276 00:16:33,325 --> 00:16:36,202 John Savage was Deer Hunter, no legs. 277 00:16:36,453 --> 00:16:39,330 Jon Voight was Coming Home, couldn't feel his legs. 278 00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:43,710 No, you've got it totally the other way around, my friend. Jon Voight... 279 00:16:43,877 --> 00:16:45,712 - Honey? Ahem. - What? Oh. 280 00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:56,806 - Shall we? - It's not gonna happen. 281 00:16:57,057 --> 00:17:00,309 They're doing it tonight. We can do it tomorrow. 282 00:17:02,646 --> 00:17:06,566 Uh, in the future, if I could see the schedule beforehand... 283 00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:12,155 So when I woke up this morning... 284 00:17:12,364 --> 00:17:15,533 ...he'd stolen all the insoles out of my shoes! 285 00:17:15,701 --> 00:17:16,826 Why? 286 00:17:16,994 --> 00:17:20,872 He thinks I slept with his ex-girlfriend and killed his fish. 287 00:17:21,123 --> 00:17:22,915 Why would you kill his fish? 288 00:17:26,336 --> 00:17:29,005 Because sometimes after you sleep with someone... 289 00:17:29,256 --> 00:17:31,591 ...you have to kill a fish. 290 00:17:33,719 --> 00:17:35,136 Chandler, honey... 291 00:17:35,387 --> 00:17:36,512 ...I'm sorry. 292 00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:39,057 Can we watch Joey's show now, please? 293 00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:41,100 - Yeah! - Wait. He's not here yet. 294 00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:43,603 He's on the show, he knows what happens. 295 00:17:44,813 --> 00:17:47,231 I'm fine about my problem now, by the way. 296 00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:51,694 Amber... 297 00:17:52,321 --> 00:17:54,739 ...I want you to know I'll always be there for you... 298 00:17:54,948 --> 00:17:56,991 ...as a friend and as your brother. 299 00:17:57,701 --> 00:17:59,243 Oh, Drake. 300 00:17:59,953 --> 00:18:01,245 Hard day, huh? 301 00:18:01,497 --> 00:18:04,165 - First the medical award, now this? - Yeah. 302 00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:07,668 - Some guys are just lucky, I guess. Ha, ha. - Ha-ha-ha. 303 00:18:07,836 --> 00:18:09,504 Dr. Ramoray... 304 00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:12,381 ...report to first floor Emergency stat. - Hmm. 305 00:18:13,217 --> 00:18:14,884 Well, then... 306 00:18:15,677 --> 00:18:17,386 ...I, uh, guess that's me. 307 00:18:19,848 --> 00:18:23,226 Anyone else need to go on the elevator? Dr. Horton? Dr. Wong? 308 00:18:23,393 --> 00:18:26,479 No, no. They only said you. 309 00:18:28,732 --> 00:18:31,234 Oh, okay. All right. 310 00:18:31,401 --> 00:18:34,070 - I love you, Drake. - Yeah, whatever. 311 00:18:35,489 --> 00:18:38,074 - Oh, no! Drake, look out! 312 00:18:42,704 --> 00:18:45,039 - Did they just kill off Joey? - No! 313 00:18:47,459 --> 00:18:49,168 Now maybe. 314 00:18:51,463 --> 00:18:53,756 Come on! Open up! We want to talk to you! 315 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:55,424 I don't feel like talking! 316 00:18:55,634 --> 00:18:57,426 Come on! We care about you. 317 00:18:57,594 --> 00:19:01,889 We're worried about you. And some of us have to pee! 318 00:19:06,061 --> 00:19:07,562 I'm sorry, Joey. 319 00:19:09,690 --> 00:19:13,151 Listen, sorry about your death. That really sucks. 320 00:19:13,819 --> 00:19:17,155 - We came over as soon as we saw. - How could you not tell us? 321 00:19:17,364 --> 00:19:21,117 I don't know. I was kind of hoping no one would ever find out. 322 00:19:22,578 --> 00:19:25,329 Well, maybe they could find a way to bring you back. 323 00:19:25,497 --> 00:19:31,002 No, they said that when they found my body, my brain was so smashed in... 324 00:19:31,253 --> 00:19:34,839 ...that the only doctor who could've saved me was me. 325 00:19:36,592 --> 00:19:38,885 It's supposed to be some kind of irony. 326 00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:42,555 But Joey, you're gonna be fine. 327 00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:46,184 You don't need that show. It was just a dumb soap opera. 328 00:19:46,393 --> 00:19:49,562 This was the greatest thing that ever happened to me. 329 00:19:49,771 --> 00:19:52,398 Yes! I was going to incorporate that. 330 00:19:53,901 --> 00:19:56,986 Oh, good, here's Monica. She'll have something nice to say. 331 00:19:58,405 --> 00:20:02,074 Um, I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. 332 00:20:03,452 --> 00:20:05,119 What? To me, that's nice. 333 00:20:06,580 --> 00:20:08,497 It's gonna be okay. You know that. 334 00:20:09,082 --> 00:20:10,750 No, I don't. 335 00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:15,338 It's like you work your whole life for something... 336 00:20:15,589 --> 00:20:17,715 ...and you think that when you get it... 337 00:20:17,966 --> 00:20:20,301 ...it'll never be as good as you thought. 338 00:20:20,510 --> 00:20:22,261 But this so was. 339 00:20:22,638 --> 00:20:24,222 It changed everything. 340 00:20:24,431 --> 00:20:27,642 Like, the other day, I got this credit card application... 341 00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:30,186 ...and I was pre-approved! 342 00:20:31,730 --> 00:20:36,108 Huh? I've never been pre-approved for anything in my life! 343 00:20:36,318 --> 00:20:37,860 I'm sorry, man. 344 00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:41,364 I don't know if this'll mean anything to you... 345 00:20:41,573 --> 00:20:44,200 ...but you'll always be pre-approved with us. 346 00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:47,161 No, that means nothing to me. 347 00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:53,000 Ahh! 348 00:20:54,378 --> 00:20:56,254 Pecan sandy? Just made them. 349 00:20:57,881 --> 00:20:59,298 Yeah, all right. 350 00:21:00,968 --> 00:21:02,593 Are these raisins? 351 00:21:02,761 --> 00:21:04,220 Uh, sure, why not? 352 00:21:11,645 --> 00:21:13,813 Listen, Eddie. Um, ahem. 353 00:21:14,564 --> 00:21:17,858 I've been thinking about our living situation and, uh... 354 00:21:18,026 --> 00:21:19,193 Why are you smiling? 355 00:21:19,361 --> 00:21:22,780 I got a little surprise. Look. There's a new fishy. 356 00:21:23,532 --> 00:21:24,865 I named him, uh... 357 00:21:25,075 --> 00:21:27,618 ...Chandler, you know, after you. 358 00:21:36,795 --> 00:21:39,547 Well, that's not even a real fish. 359 00:21:40,841 --> 00:21:43,301 No, that's a Goldfish cracker. 360 00:21:45,178 --> 00:21:46,846 So, what's your point, man? 361 00:21:51,018 --> 00:21:52,893 Okay, good night. 362 00:21:53,812 --> 00:21:56,230 You big freak of nature. 363 00:22:12,331 --> 00:22:14,206 - Aah. - Hey. 364 00:22:18,628 --> 00:22:19,670 Hey. 365 00:22:19,963 --> 00:22:21,714 - Hey. - Hey. 366 00:22:21,882 --> 00:22:25,217 - Whoo. Brisk tonight. - Oh, man. 367 00:22:26,261 --> 00:22:28,763 - Let's never speak of this. - You got it.