You guys, hurry up. The flight leaves in four hours.
There could be traffic. The plane could leave early.
When we get to London, there could be a line at customs. Come on.
Six-hour trip to London. That's a lot of Monica.
Passport, check. Camera, check. Traveler's checks, check.
- Who are you saying "check" to? MONICA: Myself.
For remembering to pack the thing.
You know, you do a good thing, you get a check.
[CHUCKLES]
My mom does it. I never realized it was weird.
Hey, my mom used to put her head in the oven, so...
Actually, she only did it the one time. But it was pretty weird.
- Hey. MONICA: Hey.
Hey. Are you ready yet?
- Yep. You got the tickets? - Oh, got them right here. Check.
It's all London, baby. Here we go.
You got your passport?
Yeah, in my third drawer of my dresser. You don't wanna lose that.
- Oh. - There it is.
Okay, if you need the vacuum, it's in my closet on the left side.
The garbage bags are next to the refrigerator.
But Rachel's gonna be here too. Can't I just ask her?
Heh. Yeah, okay. Give that a try.
- All right, let's do it. - Woohoo.
- Yeah. Cheerio. - London, baby.
- Because that's not gonna get annoying. - London, baby!
- Oh, you know what? I was wrong. JOEY: Ha, ha.
Well, we're all here. I guess we should get going.
Oh, I wanna come over there and give you a hug...
...and wish you luck on your wedding, but I can't get up.
- Oh, I'll come hug you. - Great, can you bring me the newspaper?
Yeah.
PHOEBE: Have a great wedding. Oh. - Thanks.
- Hey, Chandler, I wanna hug you too. - Hey.
And you might as well bring me my book. It's on the counter in your apartment.
Oh.
- So we're off. - Have fun.
ROSS: Thanks. - Oh.
Oh. I can't believe you're not gonna be there.
Oh, I know.
- So come. Why don't you come? - What?
To London. Come to London. Please? It would mean so much to me.
Yeah, well, I gotta work. I'm sorry.
- Why can't you take a couple of days off? - Because I can't. I told you. No, I can't.
This is my wedding.
All right, you know what? Now we are late. Let's go, let's go, let's go!
Fine, you'll watch it on video when we get back.
Here you go, Phoebe. Here you go, Phoebo, Phoobala, Phobayboo.
[PHOEBE GIGGLES]
[CHANDLER CHUCKLES]
You. Ha, ha.
All right, let's go. Bye, Pheebs.
PHOEBE: Bye. JOEY: Bye, Pheebs.
Mwah. Goodbye. Mwah.
MONICA: Bye. - Safe flight.
JOEY: London, baby.
- Oh, God. - Oh. Do you need a hug?
You don't have to bring me anything.
All right, Chandler, do something.
- Come on, do something. - I am. I'm ignoring you.
JOEY: Okay, I'm gonna be the on-camera guy. All right.
First stop, Westminster Abbey.
- Oh, what the hell is that? - That's London, baby.
All right, the hotel's here.
Wait. No, we wanna go...
No.
I know.
I'm gonna have to go into the map.
Okay, if you see a little version of me in there, kill it.
I got it.
Here we go.
Okay, listen, listen, we're not gonna have to walk this way the entire time, are we?
Shh.
Oh, man, you made me lose it.
EMILY: And that was all before 10:00.
The caterer rang to say it's gonna be chicken kiev instead of tarragon.
The florist phoned to say there aren't any tulips.
Oh, and then the cellist has carpal tunnel syndrome...
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Emily, honey. Okay?
- Well, up yours too. ROSS: What?
- No, no. That's "time-out." - Sorry.
Sweetie, you gotta relax. Everything's gonna be great, okay?
Come on, come on.
- Chicken kiev? ROSS: Mm-hm.
Doesn't that sound delicious at the last minute?
I know, but something like salmon would just...
It would be so much more elegant than chicken.
And you wouldn't have to worry about the salmonella.
Oh.
I can't wait to see where you're getting married.
Yes. This place is beautiful. Emily's parents got married here.
I still can't believe they're tearing it down.
It really is the most lovely building you'll ever see.
I mean, it's over...
Oh, my God.
It's nice.
[EMILY GASPING]
Oh. Oh, my God.
How can this be happening? What are we gonna do?
Everything's gonna be all right.
- How is it gonna be all right? - Uh-huh, I see that.
Okay, I talked to the guy and found out what happened.
ROSS & EMILY: What? - They tore it down a few days early.
JOEY: All right.
Westminster Abbey.
Hands down, best abbey I ever seen.
Hey.
Okay.
What do you think of the abbey, Chandler?
Oh, I think it's great. They're thinking of changing the name.
- Really? To what? - To "Put the Camera Away."
Man, you are Westminster Crabby.
[GRUNTS]
- Honey, don't get up. What do you need? - Oh, no. Oh, nothing.
Come on. I'm here to take care of you. What do you need? Anything.
Okay, I have a wedgie.
Okay, that is all you.
So, what do you want for lunch?
Oh, I don't know.
- I guess we have to eat. - Yeah, I do.
What's the matter?
I'm just bummed the way I left things with Ross.
I wish I didn't lie to him about having to work.
He seemed so mad at me.
Ah, don't be so hard on yourself. If someone I was still in love with was...
- Still in love with? - Yeah.
I'm not in love with Ross.
Oh.
No, no. Good.
Yeah, me neither.
Phoebe, I'm not going to Ross' wedding, because he's my ex-boyfriend...
...and that would be really uncomfortable.
Not because I'm still in love with him. Hey, I like Ross as much as the next guy.
You know, clearly I have feelings for him, but feelings don't mean love.
You know, I mean, do I still have loving feelings for Ross?
Yeah.
I have continuing feelings of love.
But that doesn't mean that I'm still in love with him.
You know, I mean, I have sexual feelings for him, but I do love him.
[GASPS]
Oh, my God. Oh, my...
Why didn't you tell me?
- We thought you knew. - We?
Yeah, we all know. We talk about it all the time.
You all know? Does Ross know?
Oh, no. Ross doesn't know anything.
Oh. I cannot believe you didn't tell me.
Because we thought you knew. It's so obvious.
God, it would be like, you know, telling Monica:
"Hey," you know, "you like things clean."
Hi.
So, what are you fine gentlemen in the market for?
- We've got scarves, souvenir postcards. - Check this out, huh?
Oh, yeah.
That's the stuff. What do you think?
Well, I'm not gonna have to buy that "I'm with stupid" T-shirt anymore.
Well, I like it. Here you go.
You're not really gonna buy that. Don't you think you've embarrassed me enough?
Oh, I embarrass you?
How can I answer that when I'm pretending I don't know you?
He's just jealous. You'll fit right in. All Londoners wear them.
Oh, really? Then how come no one here anywhere is wearing one?
They're all tourists.
All right, look, if you insist on wearing that in public, you know...
...you're gonna spend the rest of the afternoon all by yourself.
JOEY: Oh, yeah?
If you're gonna make me choose between you and the hat, I choose the hat.
- Good choice. - Thanks.
Okay, look. All right, that's it, okay?
I'm out of here. I'm not gonna be embarrassed anymore.
- Hello? - Hey.
I just spoke to your dad, and you know what?
He thinks we'll be able to find a new place.
- We don't have to. - What, you found a place?
No, but Monica and I were talking...
...and I was so upset about the hall being knocked down...
...and she suggested that we just put the wedding off for a bit.
- She said what? - She said if I'm not happy...
...getting married somewhere we can find in a day, well, we should just postpone it.
[SCOFFS]
Postpone it? Heh.
Emily, do you think Monica realizes how much our parents spent on this wedding?
Huh? Do you think my sister's teeny, tiny little brain comprehends...
...that people took time out of their lives...
...to fly thousands of miles to be here? Huh?
This isn't right.
I realize that people are gonna be disappointed.
[ROSS SCOFFS]
But they'll come back when we can do it right.
Well, I can't ask people to do that. Would you ask people to do that?
Don't you point your pants at me.
We have no choice.
Anywhere that's half-decent will have been booked months ago.
Ross, don't you understand? This is our wedding.
The only thing I understand is postponing it is not an option.
This is when we're getting married.
- What are you saying, it's now or never? - No, I'm saying it's now.
- Or? - There's no "or" in mine.
What is wrong with these pants?
It's not the pants. It's you who's backwards.
And if you don't understand how important this is to me...
...perhaps we shouldn't be getting married at all.
Emily, no. Wait, stop. Emily, please...
[SCREAMS]
- Hey. - Hi.
So did shopping help you feel any better about Ross?
Manhattan does not have enough stores.
Well, I think I can help you get over him.
- You can? - Yeah.
I just need you to bring me some photos of Ross...
...and, um, a small piece of chocolate...
...and a glass of tepid water.
Ooh. Is this one of those things where you throw stuff in a bag with graveyard dirt...
...and hang it from a north-facing tree?
Uh, only if you have the hiccups too.
The pictures are for you. The chocolate and water's for me.
I just didn't feel like getting up.
Okay. I'm gonna show you a picture of Ross, okay...
...and you're going to remember all the bad things about him, all right?
- Really focus on his flaws. - I can do that.
Certainly did that while we were going out. Heh.
Okay. Mm.
Before we get started, I just wanna say, for the record, I love Ross.
I think he's such a great guy.
Okay. Now close your eyes.
- And imagine that you're with Ross. - Mm-hm.
- Okay, and imagine that you're kissing him. - Mm-hm.
You're running your hands all over his body.
And then you run your hands through his hair...
...but, oh, ew, gross, it's some kind of grease, it's... Ugh.
Ah?
I don't know.
I don't know, his hair never bothered me that much.
And you know, it was always more crunchy than it was greasy.
Okay. This is gonna be harder than I thought.
Um, ahem. Let's try some aversion therapy.
- Okay. All right. - Okay? All right.
- Look at the picture. - Okay.
All right, and, um...
Ow!
- Okay. How do you feel now? - Well, I like you less.
- Hey. - Hey.
- Oh. Sorry. - No, no, you know what? I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have said you were embarrassing me.
That really wasn't cool.
And if it makes you feel any better, I've had a really lousy day.
Me too.
- Yeah? - No!
I had the best day ever.
Dude, check this out.
[KNOCKING]
- Hey. - Shh, shh, shh.
Say hi to my friend and tell him you like my hat.
- Okay, so, what's your friend's name? - Oh. Chandler.
Hi, Chandler.
That's... That's...
- Oh, my God. - That's Fergie, baby!
Joey says you don't really like his hat, but I think it's kind of dashing.
When did you...? How...?
I was trying to figure out how to get to Buckingham Palace.
So I'm in my map and...
Hey.
MONICA: Hey. - Hey.
I understand you had a little talk with Emily.
Ha, ha. Yes, I did.
And you are welcome.
Am I?
And was it your idea to postpone the wedding?
Um...
- I'm gonna go to the bathroom. - Wait up.
Hey, hey, since you're the fix-it lady, here's a pickle:
What do you do when the bride says she doesn't wanna have the wedding at all?
- She said that? - Yeah.
- Why? - I don't know.
I told her it was stupid to put off the wedding just because the hall was gone...
...and she, like, flipped out.
Oh, my God. You're even dumber than I am.
Excuse me?
Ross, how long have you been planning this wedding?
I don't know. A month?
Emily has probably been planning it since she was 5.
Ever since the first time she took a pillowcase and hung it off her head.
That's what we did.
We dreamed about the perfect wedding.
In the perfect place.
[IN STRAINED VOICE] With the perfect four-tiered wedding cake.
With the little people on top.
But the most important part...
...is that we had the perfect guy...
...who understood just how important all that other stuff was.
I had no idea.
That pillowcase thing, I thought you guys were just doing The Flying Nun.
Sometimes we were.
Come on.
You gotta help me figure out what to do.
- Okay? - All right.
Come on.
- Whoa. Pretty intense, huh? - Yeah.
I hope Ross didn't think we went in there because we were uncomfortable out here.
I hope he did.
[PHONE RINGS]
- Hello? - Hey, Pheebs, it's Joey.
Hey, Joey. Hey. Ooh, ooh.
I just saw someone that looks just like you on the subway.
I was gonna go over and say hi, but then I figured he doesn't care he looks like you.
That just cost me 4 bucks.
I just called to see how the chick and the duck are doing.
They're having a great time with Aunt Phoebe.
Aunt Rachel hasn't been helpful at all.
So do you miss me?
Kind of, but I've just been having way too much fun.
Oh, so you're not homesick yet?
No, I don't think so.
All right, well, the seven of us miss you.
- Who's seven? - Well, you know, me, Rachel...
...the birds, the babies.
Aw, the babies miss me?
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
- Ooh, pizza guy's here. - What? You ordered pizza without me?
Yeah, but we were thinking about you. We ordered the Joey Special.
Two pizzas?
- Yeah. Okay, gotta go. Talk to you later. - Wait, wait. Where did you get it from?
[DIAL TONE DRONES]
[ON TV] Where everybody knows your name
And they're always glad you came
You wanna be where you can see The troubles are all the same
You wanna be Where everybody knows your name
- Monica, why have you brought me here? - You'll see.
I tell you, this wedding is not gonna happen.
Oh, Ross.
Okay? But imagine a lot more lights, okay, and, you know, fewer bricks...
...and flowers and candles.
MONICA: Okay, and the musicians, they can go over here, okay?
And the chairs, they can face this way and...
You go.
But if you don't love this, then we'll do it any other place...
...any other time.
Really, it's fine. Whatever you want.
It's perfect.
- And, I don't know, if it starts to rain... - Well, then we'll get wet.
Aw.
I don't even have a date.
RACHEL: Pheebs? - Yeah?
RACHEL: Do you remember where the duck food is?
Yeah, it's in the guys' apartment, under the sink. Why?
Because I'm going to London.
What? What do you mean, you're going to London?
Yeah, I have to tell Ross that I love him.
Now, honey, you take care, and you don't have those babies till I get back. Mwah.
Rachel, you can't go. Ross loves Emily.
I know, I know, I know he does, but I have to tell him how I feel.
He deserves to have all of the information. Then he can make an informed decision.
That's not why you're going. You're going because you hope he'll say:
"Yeah, I love you too, Rach. Forget about that British chippie."
Do you think he will?
No, because he's in love with the British chippie.
Look, Rachel, if you go, you're just gonna mess with his head and ruin his wedding.
You know? It's too late. You missed your chance.
I'm sorry. I know this must be really hard.
But it's over.
[SIGHS]
You know what? No. It's not over until someone says "I do."
I do. I do! I do!
[SIGHS]
[GROANS]
Yeah, like I can really chase you. I'm carrying a litter.
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
[English - US - SDH]