1 00:00:21,842 --> 00:00:24,191 Good morning. Come dance with me. 2 00:00:28,945 --> 00:00:30,142 Why not? 3 00:00:31,282 --> 00:00:33,862 While I subscribe to the many worlds theory 4 00:00:33,987 --> 00:00:38,133 which poses the existence of an infinite number of Sheldons and universes, 5 00:00:38,258 --> 00:00:41,023 I assure you that none of them am I dancing. 6 00:00:42,512 --> 00:00:44,478 Are you fun in any of them? 7 00:00:45,946 --> 00:00:49,139 The math would suggest that in a few I'm a clown made of candy. 8 00:00:51,711 --> 00:00:53,218 But I don't dance. 9 00:00:53,885 --> 00:00:55,262 Want some French toast? 10 00:00:55,431 --> 00:00:56,638 It's oatmeal day. 11 00:00:58,343 --> 00:01:01,101 Tell you what, next French toast day, I'll make you oatmeal. 12 00:01:01,544 --> 00:01:04,654 Dear Lord, are you still going to be here on French toast day? 13 00:01:09,357 --> 00:01:10,467 Morning. 14 00:01:11,638 --> 00:01:13,155 Penny made French toast. 15 00:01:13,325 --> 00:01:15,557 Sorry I haven't given her your schedule yet. 16 00:01:15,744 --> 00:01:17,160 It's an iCal download. 17 00:01:17,285 --> 00:01:18,910 She can put it right in her phone. 18 00:01:20,467 --> 00:01:23,248 And I thought we agreed that you'd have your conjugal visits in her apartment. 19 00:01:23,904 --> 00:01:26,554 We did, but there were extenuating circumstances. 20 00:01:26,679 --> 00:01:27,467 I see. 21 00:01:27,592 --> 00:01:30,464 Did her abysmal housekeeping skills finally trump her perkiness? 22 00:01:32,788 --> 00:01:35,011 No, her bed kind of... broke. 23 00:01:37,816 --> 00:01:39,056 That doesn't seem likely. 24 00:01:39,298 --> 00:01:41,098 Her bed's of sturdy construction. 25 00:01:42,153 --> 00:01:45,593 Even the addition of a 2nd normal size human being wouldn't cause a failure. 26 00:01:45,718 --> 00:01:47,606 Much less a homunculus such as yourself. 27 00:01:49,592 --> 00:01:50,776 A homunculus? 28 00:01:50,945 --> 00:01:53,139 Perfectly formed miniature human being. 29 00:01:55,763 --> 00:01:58,313 You're my little homunculus. 30 00:01:59,468 --> 00:02:01,278 - Don't do that. - Sorry. 31 00:02:01,403 --> 00:02:03,247 Who wants syrup and who wants cinnamon sugar? 32 00:02:03,415 --> 00:02:04,641 I want oatmeal. 33 00:02:05,627 --> 00:02:08,541 I want a boyfriend whose roommate isn't a giant pain in the ass. 34 00:02:09,297 --> 00:02:10,925 I'm sure that will happen soon enough. 35 00:02:12,790 --> 00:02:14,935 But in the meantime, I still want oatmeal. 36 00:02:16,054 --> 00:02:17,954 You know what, I give up. He's impossible. 37 00:02:18,079 --> 00:02:20,479 I can't be impossible. I exist. 38 00:02:21,308 --> 00:02:24,532 I believe what you meant to say is, "I give up, he's improbable." 39 00:02:31,403 --> 00:02:34,341 You really need to find a better way of dealing with Penny. 40 00:02:34,466 --> 00:02:37,591 What am I supposed to do... eat French toast on a Monday? 41 00:02:37,716 --> 00:02:39,351 Now, that would be impossible. 42 00:02:40,820 --> 00:02:43,537 I'm just saying, you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. 43 00:02:44,140 --> 00:02:46,999 You can catch more flies with manure. What's your point? 44 00:02:48,152 --> 00:02:48,997 It's a... 45 00:02:53,362 --> 00:02:55,042 Boy, that does smell good. 46 00:02:56,092 --> 00:02:57,592 Too bad it's Monday. 47 00:03:00,555 --> 00:03:02,724 Episode 303: The Gothowitz Deviation 48 00:03:03,225 --> 00:03:05,274 Sync: Jess, Linwelin, Loky 49 00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:22,154 www.subbercafe.fr 50 00:03:25,723 --> 00:03:28,032 So Kim the night manager went on maternity leave, 51 00:03:28,157 --> 00:03:29,751 And her husband's name is Sandy. 52 00:03:30,032 --> 00:03:31,002 So get this... 53 00:03:31,171 --> 00:03:33,512 Her replacement is a woman named Sandy 54 00:03:33,637 --> 00:03:35,370 whose husband's name is Kim. 55 00:03:40,137 --> 00:03:41,096 I know. 56 00:03:41,532 --> 00:03:42,889 What are the odds? 57 00:03:43,197 --> 00:03:44,221 Easily calculable. 58 00:03:44,346 --> 00:03:46,596 We begin by identifying a set of married couples 59 00:03:46,721 --> 00:03:47,754 with unisex names. 60 00:03:47,879 --> 00:03:49,959 We eliminate those unqualified for restaurant work... 61 00:03:50,084 --> 00:03:52,622 The aged, the imprisoned and the limbless, for example. 62 00:03:52,747 --> 00:03:54,322 Next we look at the... 63 00:03:55,158 --> 00:03:57,737 It's an amazing coincidence. Can we leave it at that? 64 00:03:59,594 --> 00:04:00,594 I'm sorry. 65 00:04:02,644 --> 00:04:05,719 It's as if the Cheesecake Factory is run by witches. 66 00:04:09,718 --> 00:04:11,893 It's as if you don't think I'll punch you. 67 00:04:14,203 --> 00:04:15,880 Come on, you guys, let it go. 68 00:04:16,049 --> 00:04:17,094 Fine, whatever. 69 00:04:18,165 --> 00:04:19,395 Are you finished? 70 00:04:20,285 --> 00:04:21,220 Thank you. 71 00:04:21,405 --> 00:04:22,595 How thoughtful. 72 00:04:23,264 --> 00:04:24,931 Would you like a chocolate? 73 00:04:26,058 --> 00:04:27,158 Yeah, sure. 74 00:04:30,355 --> 00:04:31,225 Thanks. 75 00:04:34,275 --> 00:04:35,345 What was that? 76 00:04:37,103 --> 00:04:38,783 You said be nice to Penny. 77 00:04:38,908 --> 00:04:42,335 I believe offering chocolate to someone falls within the definition of nice. 78 00:04:43,345 --> 00:04:46,548 It does. But in my experience, you don't. 79 00:04:48,348 --> 00:04:50,718 There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, 80 00:04:50,843 --> 00:04:52,500 Than are dreamt of in your philosophy 81 00:04:53,029 --> 00:04:54,284 Now that's you. 82 00:04:54,409 --> 00:04:55,988 Obnoxious and insufferable. 83 00:05:03,270 --> 00:05:04,845 What's going on, day dwellers? 84 00:05:06,187 --> 00:05:09,727 Oh, man, did the Kiss Army repeal "don't ask, don't tell"? 85 00:05:11,965 --> 00:05:15,231 Raj and I are going to a goth club in Hollywood 86 00:05:15,356 --> 00:05:16,991 to hang with the night people. 87 00:05:18,611 --> 00:05:22,220 - Anybody want to come along? - You're actually going out like that? 88 00:05:23,757 --> 00:05:25,362 I'm going out like this... 89 00:05:28,803 --> 00:05:29,788 What did you do? 90 00:05:29,998 --> 00:05:32,415 They're called tattoo sleeves. Look. 91 00:05:33,670 --> 00:05:35,710 I got them online. Raj got a set, too... 92 00:05:39,498 --> 00:05:40,983 Fantastic, right? 93 00:05:41,108 --> 00:05:44,072 Put them on, have hot sex with some freaky girl with her business pierced, 94 00:05:44,197 --> 00:05:47,096 take them off, and I can still be buried in a Jewish cemetery. 95 00:05:49,183 --> 00:05:51,726 You know, I've always wanted to go to a goth nightclub. 96 00:05:51,971 --> 00:05:53,423 - Really? - Bazinga! 97 00:05:56,105 --> 00:05:58,870 None of you ever see my practical jokes coming, do you? 98 00:05:59,949 --> 00:06:03,244 Okay, how about you two? Look, I've got some extra tat sleeves. 99 00:06:04,705 --> 00:06:06,156 Why are you carrying extras? 100 00:06:06,326 --> 00:06:08,723 In case I snag one on someone's nipple ring. 101 00:06:10,646 --> 00:06:11,746 I think we'll pass. 102 00:06:13,610 --> 00:06:16,130 Is the missus speaking for the couple now? 103 00:06:17,587 --> 00:06:19,132 In this case, you bet she is. 104 00:06:22,220 --> 00:06:24,531 Yes, she's pushy, and yes, he's whipped, 105 00:06:24,656 --> 00:06:26,406 but that's not the expression. 106 00:06:30,721 --> 00:06:33,895 Come on, I want to stop at Walgreen's and pick up some more eyeliner. 107 00:06:39,178 --> 00:06:41,524 They're gonna get beaten up at that club. 108 00:06:42,373 --> 00:06:44,473 They're gonna get beaten up at Walgreen's. 109 00:06:48,690 --> 00:06:50,700 Sorry, Sheldon. I almost sat in your spot. 110 00:06:51,246 --> 00:06:53,519 Did you? I didn't notice. 111 00:06:53,915 --> 00:06:55,068 Have a chocolate. 112 00:06:57,260 --> 00:06:58,321 Thank you. 113 00:07:11,409 --> 00:07:13,391 I think we're fitting in quite nicely. 114 00:07:15,698 --> 00:07:18,396 It'd help if you weren't drinking light beer. 115 00:07:18,948 --> 00:07:21,606 What's so gothic about vodka and cranberry juice? 116 00:07:21,995 --> 00:07:24,234 Hello? It looks like blood. 117 00:07:24,509 --> 00:07:27,612 Did you even read the "wiki how" link I sent you on being goth? 118 00:07:28,355 --> 00:07:30,449 No, I'm behind on my wiki-reading. 119 00:07:30,574 --> 00:07:33,285 I'm kind of on a John Grisham kick right now. 120 00:07:33,797 --> 00:07:34,579 What? 121 00:07:34,747 --> 00:07:36,960 I finished reading The Pelican Brief and loved it so much, 122 00:07:37,085 --> 00:07:38,887 I dived right into The Client. 123 00:07:39,012 --> 00:07:42,737 He was a lawyer himself, so his novels are accurate as well as entertaining. 124 00:07:44,323 --> 00:07:47,237 Just remember we are lost boys, 125 00:07:47,362 --> 00:07:49,093 children of the night. 126 00:07:49,387 --> 00:07:52,813 Great. Lost boys. Children of the night. Got it. 127 00:07:53,948 --> 00:07:56,090 Can you pass the chex mix please? 128 00:07:58,062 --> 00:07:59,124 Thank you. 129 00:08:02,885 --> 00:08:04,240 We are lost boys. 130 00:08:07,197 --> 00:08:08,361 Good for you. 131 00:08:08,531 --> 00:08:11,496 I'm actually much more lost than he is. 132 00:08:13,762 --> 00:08:14,702 Nice ink. 133 00:08:15,715 --> 00:08:18,331 Thanks. Can we buy you ladies a drink? 134 00:08:19,779 --> 00:08:20,790 Two light beers. 135 00:08:21,342 --> 00:08:23,946 Light beers. Well, wiki-how about that? 136 00:08:25,788 --> 00:08:27,590 - What's your names? - I'm Howard. 137 00:08:27,715 --> 00:08:29,146 - Raj. - I'm Bethany. 138 00:08:29,489 --> 00:08:31,761 - Nice to meet you, Bethany. - Yes, very nice. 139 00:08:31,929 --> 00:08:33,398 Nice to meet you, too. 140 00:08:33,839 --> 00:08:34,903 I'm Sarah. 141 00:08:35,028 --> 00:08:36,686 Not that anyone cares. 142 00:08:40,605 --> 00:08:44,023 Do either of you ladies enjoy the novels of John Grisham? 143 00:08:53,779 --> 00:08:55,492 What's this cartoon called again? 144 00:08:55,779 --> 00:08:57,751 Oshikuru: Demon Samurai. 145 00:08:59,629 --> 00:09:00,903 It's not a cartoon. 146 00:09:01,028 --> 00:09:02,247 It's anime. 147 00:09:03,659 --> 00:09:04,671 Anime. 148 00:09:05,095 --> 00:09:07,253 I knew a girl in high school named Anna May. 149 00:09:08,329 --> 00:09:09,930 Anna May Fletcher. 150 00:09:11,495 --> 00:09:13,526 She was born with one nostril. 151 00:09:14,039 --> 00:09:17,400 Then she had this bad nose job and basically wound up with three. 152 00:09:23,218 --> 00:09:24,713 You're here a lot now. 153 00:09:27,043 --> 00:09:29,392 Am I talking too much? I'm sorry. Zip. 154 00:09:29,685 --> 00:09:30,611 Thank you. 155 00:09:31,279 --> 00:09:32,405 Chocolate? 156 00:09:33,336 --> 00:09:34,438 Yes, please. 157 00:09:41,912 --> 00:09:42,707 Hey, Kim. 158 00:09:45,244 --> 00:09:47,837 You know what, hold on. Let me take this in the hall. 159 00:09:55,338 --> 00:09:58,144 You'll never guess who they got to replace you at work. 160 00:10:03,197 --> 00:10:05,562 - I know what you're doing. - Really? 161 00:10:05,774 --> 00:10:08,815 Yes, you're using chocolates as positive reinforcement 162 00:10:08,940 --> 00:10:11,402 for what you consider correct behavior. 163 00:10:14,409 --> 00:10:15,580 Very good. 164 00:10:17,368 --> 00:10:19,764 - Chocolate? - No, I don't want any chocolate! 165 00:10:24,826 --> 00:10:28,012 You can't train my girlfriend like a lab rat. 166 00:10:29,350 --> 00:10:31,256 Actually, it turns out I can. 167 00:10:32,547 --> 00:10:34,592 Well, you shouldn't. 168 00:10:34,906 --> 00:10:36,761 There's just no pleasing you, is there? 169 00:10:36,929 --> 00:10:37,970 You weren't happy 170 00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:39,720 with my previous approach, 171 00:10:39,845 --> 00:10:42,725 so I decided to employ operant conditioning techniques, 172 00:10:42,893 --> 00:10:44,934 building on the works of Thorndike and Skinner. 173 00:10:45,223 --> 00:10:46,519 By this time next week, 174 00:10:46,690 --> 00:10:48,684 I believe I can have her jumping out of a pool, 175 00:10:48,809 --> 00:10:50,937 balancing a beach ball on her nose. 176 00:10:52,539 --> 00:10:55,111 No, this has to stop now. 177 00:10:55,282 --> 00:10:58,770 I'm not suggesting we really make her jump out of a pool. 178 00:10:59,568 --> 00:11:01,242 I thought the "bazinga" was implied. 179 00:11:02,627 --> 00:11:04,473 We're just tweaking her personality. 180 00:11:04,598 --> 00:11:06,623 Sanding off the rough edges, if you will. 181 00:11:06,793 --> 00:11:08,834 No. You're not sanding Penny. 182 00:11:09,657 --> 00:11:12,471 Are you saying that I am forbidden 183 00:11:12,596 --> 00:11:15,329 from applying a harmless, scientifically valid protocol 184 00:11:15,454 --> 00:11:17,008 that will make our lives better? 185 00:11:17,598 --> 00:11:19,969 Yes. You're forbidden. 186 00:11:23,457 --> 00:11:24,817 Bad Leonard. 187 00:11:33,773 --> 00:11:34,985 So, what do you guys do? 188 00:11:35,764 --> 00:11:37,201 You know, goth stuff. 189 00:11:37,326 --> 00:11:39,194 Goth magazines, goth music. 190 00:11:39,508 --> 00:11:40,627 Goth food. 191 00:11:41,703 --> 00:11:42,992 What's goth food? 192 00:11:45,638 --> 00:11:47,126 Blackened salmon? 193 00:11:48,793 --> 00:11:51,335 No, I meant what do you do for jobs? 194 00:11:51,763 --> 00:11:53,087 We're scientists. 195 00:11:53,255 --> 00:11:55,463 Yeah, you know, the dark sciences. 196 00:11:55,797 --> 00:11:57,383 What are the dark sciences? 197 00:11:59,056 --> 00:12:00,828 Well, I am an astrophysicist, 198 00:12:00,953 --> 00:12:03,179 and a lot of that takes place at night. 199 00:12:04,826 --> 00:12:06,515 When there are vampires 200 00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:09,288 and miscellaneous undead out and about. 201 00:12:10,579 --> 00:12:11,598 Oy vay. 202 00:12:13,516 --> 00:12:14,859 That sounds really cool. 203 00:12:16,245 --> 00:12:18,610 Does it? Okay. If you like space stuff, 204 00:12:18,735 --> 00:12:21,106 I design components for the International Space Station, 205 00:12:21,231 --> 00:12:22,247 which is in space. 206 00:12:22,372 --> 00:12:24,863 Where, as I'm sure you know, no one can hear you scream. 207 00:12:28,768 --> 00:12:31,292 - So, what do you gals do? - I work at the Gap. 208 00:12:31,647 --> 00:12:34,377 Really? How about that? I've been to the Gap. 209 00:12:34,548 --> 00:12:37,681 I've been there, as well. I like your t-shirts with the little pocket. 210 00:12:38,987 --> 00:12:40,456 I work there, too. 211 00:12:40,581 --> 00:12:42,017 Not that anyone cares. 212 00:12:44,692 --> 00:12:46,931 You know, this place is boring. 213 00:12:48,848 --> 00:12:51,060 Why don't we go somewhere else and have some fun? 214 00:12:51,580 --> 00:12:53,646 - Okay. - Sure, we like fun. 215 00:12:53,817 --> 00:12:56,685 - We are fun people. - Dark and fun. 216 00:12:57,733 --> 00:13:00,178 Come on. I know a place you'll really dig. 217 00:13:03,490 --> 00:13:05,582 - Did you bring the black condoms? - In my fanny pack. 218 00:13:05,707 --> 00:13:06,707 Let's go. 219 00:13:14,207 --> 00:13:15,672 Are you happy now? 220 00:13:18,207 --> 00:13:19,531 Not particularly. 221 00:13:23,927 --> 00:13:25,511 Oh, my God, she didn't! 222 00:13:27,932 --> 00:13:30,184 What could she possibly be talking about for so long? 223 00:13:30,849 --> 00:13:33,207 Obviously, waitressing at the Cheesecake Factory 224 00:13:33,332 --> 00:13:35,884 is a complex socioeconomic activity 225 00:13:36,009 --> 00:13:39,160 that requires a great deal of analysis and planning. 226 00:13:41,893 --> 00:13:43,133 Bazinga. 227 00:13:44,920 --> 00:13:48,020 You know, using positive reinforcement techniques, 228 00:13:48,145 --> 00:13:50,764 I could train that behavior out of her in a week. 229 00:13:52,584 --> 00:13:55,745 Let me use negative reinforcement, I can get it done before we go to bed. 230 00:13:56,446 --> 00:13:59,396 You're not squirting her in the face with water. 231 00:13:59,840 --> 00:14:01,040 Of course not. 232 00:14:01,208 --> 00:14:02,967 We're talking very mild electric shocks. 233 00:14:04,208 --> 00:14:06,108 No tissue damage whatsoever. 234 00:14:07,203 --> 00:14:09,206 - Forget it. - Oh, come on. 235 00:14:09,331 --> 00:14:10,391 You can't tell me 236 00:14:10,559 --> 00:14:12,833 that you're not intrigued about the possibility 237 00:14:12,958 --> 00:14:14,686 of building a better girlfriend. 238 00:14:14,898 --> 00:14:15,898 I'm not. 239 00:14:16,167 --> 00:14:18,335 Penny's qualities, both good and bad, 240 00:14:18,460 --> 00:14:20,310 are what make her who she is. 241 00:14:24,169 --> 00:14:26,864 You mean, like that high-pitched, irritating laugh? 242 00:14:29,370 --> 00:14:31,820 You wouldn't prefer a throaty chuckle? 243 00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:34,939 You're not changing how Penny laughs. 244 00:14:35,588 --> 00:14:37,126 That would be incongruous. 245 00:14:37,386 --> 00:14:40,004 I was going to lower the whole voice to a more pleasing register. 246 00:14:41,922 --> 00:14:43,022 Sorry, guys. 247 00:14:43,271 --> 00:14:45,160 That girl is freaky. 248 00:14:46,678 --> 00:14:47,678 Come again? 249 00:14:48,219 --> 00:14:49,178 Freaky. 250 00:14:49,648 --> 00:14:51,548 - Freaky? - Yeah, freaky. 251 00:15:00,418 --> 00:15:01,768 Have a chocolate. 252 00:15:12,769 --> 00:15:14,393 Are you going to deface your body 253 00:15:14,518 --> 00:15:16,645 just for the possibility you could have cheap sex 254 00:15:16,770 --> 00:15:18,417 with a strange girl you met in a bar? 255 00:15:22,226 --> 00:15:23,671 What is your mother going to say? 256 00:15:23,967 --> 00:15:25,767 She's not going to see it. 257 00:15:25,954 --> 00:15:28,217 She takes my temperature orally now. 258 00:15:31,557 --> 00:15:32,997 What are you going to get? 259 00:15:33,122 --> 00:15:34,647 I can't really decide 260 00:15:34,772 --> 00:15:37,456 between a screaming devil, this mean little skull, 261 00:15:37,581 --> 00:15:39,031 or Kermit the frog. 262 00:15:40,344 --> 00:15:41,971 - Kermit the frog? - You know. 263 00:15:42,096 --> 00:15:44,006 Hi-ho. I'm on Howard's butt. 264 00:15:46,230 --> 00:15:47,815 Get the mean little skull, 265 00:15:47,940 --> 00:15:49,615 and I'll see if I can make him smile. 266 00:15:49,783 --> 00:15:52,283 I'd like the mean little skull, please. 267 00:15:53,032 --> 00:15:55,082 What are you going to get, Raj? 268 00:15:55,335 --> 00:15:57,035 With my luck, hepatitis. 269 00:15:59,189 --> 00:16:00,539 Okay, here we go. 270 00:16:02,336 --> 00:16:04,136 That's just rubbing alcohol. 271 00:16:04,824 --> 00:16:06,524 I know, but it was cold. 272 00:16:08,753 --> 00:16:10,259 I'm putting on the stencil. 273 00:16:10,429 --> 00:16:12,929 - What comes after the stencil? - This. 274 00:16:19,521 --> 00:16:21,522 No needle. No pain. No tattoo. 275 00:16:21,690 --> 00:16:23,903 What's the big deal? You've done this before. 276 00:16:24,028 --> 00:16:25,990 No, I haven't. Look. 277 00:16:28,079 --> 00:16:30,574 I'm sorry. I'm a fraud. He's a fraud. 278 00:16:30,699 --> 00:16:32,950 - We're both frauds. - I think I covered that. 279 00:16:33,118 --> 00:16:34,668 But I was summing up. 280 00:16:37,326 --> 00:16:39,326 We're not goth. We're just... 281 00:16:40,139 --> 00:16:41,139 Guys. 282 00:16:41,264 --> 00:16:42,864 Very, very smart guys. 283 00:16:43,302 --> 00:16:44,794 So you were totally scamming us? 284 00:16:47,437 --> 00:16:49,091 And I wouldn't blame you 285 00:16:49,260 --> 00:16:52,193 if you walked out of here and never wanted to see us again. 286 00:16:52,638 --> 00:16:56,319 Unless, of course, our bold honesty has suddenly made us attractive. 287 00:16:56,444 --> 00:16:57,894 Huh? Huh? Anything? 288 00:17:00,860 --> 00:17:01,960 I'm leaving. 289 00:17:06,451 --> 00:17:07,801 I'm leaving, too. 290 00:17:08,162 --> 00:17:09,762 Not that anyone cares. 291 00:17:17,451 --> 00:17:20,329 When we tell this story, let's end it differently. 292 00:17:21,446 --> 00:17:24,688 What are you thinking? Maybe a big musical number? 293 00:17:29,137 --> 00:17:32,485 Well, I'm going to make some warm milk and then turn in. 294 00:17:33,324 --> 00:17:36,699 I trust if you two are planning on engaging in amorous activities, 295 00:17:36,824 --> 00:17:38,681 you'll keep the decibel level to a minimum. 296 00:17:39,479 --> 00:17:40,479 Of course. 297 00:17:40,889 --> 00:17:41,889 Thank you. 298 00:17:44,811 --> 00:17:46,349 These are so good. 299 00:17:48,292 --> 00:17:49,442 Unbelievable. 300 00:17:51,575 --> 00:17:52,575 What? 301 00:17:52,950 --> 00:17:55,741 I was just thinking we should probably turn in, too. 302 00:17:56,305 --> 00:17:57,785 My new bed got delivered. 303 00:17:57,953 --> 00:18:00,036 If you put it together, you can stay at my place. 304 00:18:00,463 --> 00:18:02,456 That's a lot of work, and it's kind of late. 305 00:18:02,624 --> 00:18:04,540 But if we stay there, we won't have to be quiet. 306 00:18:04,819 --> 00:18:05,819 Let's go. 307 00:18:09,156 --> 00:18:10,256 Interesting. 308 00:18:11,167 --> 00:18:14,930 Sex works even better than chocolate to modify behavior. 309 00:18:17,917 --> 00:18:20,817 I wonder if anyone else has stumbled onto that. 310 00:18:28,118 --> 00:18:29,567 Okay, wait. How about this? 311 00:18:29,801 --> 00:18:32,001 We say there were four goth girls. 312 00:18:32,178 --> 00:18:34,414 The two girls in the club had two friends. 313 00:18:34,824 --> 00:18:35,983 I like it, I like it. 314 00:18:36,342 --> 00:18:39,202 Did they smell good despite their goth-like nature? 315 00:18:39,968 --> 00:18:41,162 What's the matter? 316 00:18:41,372 --> 00:18:43,873 Engaging my olfactory sense helps make it real for me. 317 00:18:44,176 --> 00:18:45,876 Fine, they smelled good. 318 00:18:46,085 --> 00:18:48,585 They did. Like jasmine and honeysuckle. 319 00:18:51,507 --> 00:18:54,505 Then they held hands and did a sexy, demonic hokey pokey for us. 320 00:18:56,207 --> 00:18:59,223 Let me say my story then you say yours, then we'll pick. 321 00:18:59,348 --> 00:19:00,348 Sorry. Go on. 322 00:19:00,676 --> 00:19:01,803 We got tattoos, 323 00:19:01,928 --> 00:19:04,227 and then the four girls took us to their place. 324 00:19:04,437 --> 00:19:06,813 But we don't have tattoos. What if someone asks to see them? 325 00:19:07,414 --> 00:19:09,914 We say they're in a very intimate area. 326 00:19:11,002 --> 00:19:12,650 We're bad boys, aren't we? 327 00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:19,951 So, we go back to their place and the six of us end up in a hot tub. 328 00:19:20,161 --> 00:19:21,384 But we just got tattoos. 329 00:19:21,509 --> 00:19:24,330 Wouldn't we be concerned about bacterial infection? 330 00:19:25,341 --> 00:19:27,441 True. Okay. Forget the hot tub. 331 00:19:27,664 --> 00:19:31,668 The point is, we each had a ménage with sexy goth girls. 332 00:19:35,428 --> 00:19:36,878 What a great night. 333 00:19:45,619 --> 00:19:47,520 Want to try a country bar tomorrow night? 334 00:19:48,006 --> 00:19:50,106 Maybe we'll get lucky with some sexy cowgirls. 335 00:19:50,951 --> 00:19:52,101 Could happen. 336 00:19:55,023 --> 00:19:56,404 I wonder how they smell.