1 00:00:02,942 --> 00:00:04,128 Whatcha doin' there? 2 00:00:04,296 --> 00:00:06,172 Working on a new plan to catch the roadrunner? 3 00:00:07,824 --> 00:00:11,048 The humorous implication being that I am Wile E. Coyote? 4 00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:16,808 And this is a schematic for a bird-trapping device 5 00:00:16,976 --> 00:00:20,079 that will ultimately backfire and cause me physical injury? 6 00:00:27,087 --> 00:00:28,572 What I'm doing here 7 00:00:28,697 --> 00:00:31,831 is trying to determine when I'm going to die. 8 00:00:33,002 --> 00:00:35,307 A lot of people are working on that research. 9 00:00:36,893 --> 00:00:38,138 So what is all this? 10 00:00:38,263 --> 00:00:41,207 My family history factoring in longevity, 11 00:00:41,375 --> 00:00:43,385 propensity for disease, et cetera. 12 00:00:43,752 --> 00:00:44,847 Interesting. 13 00:00:44,972 --> 00:00:47,964 Cause of death for Uncle Carl was KBB. What's "KBB"? 14 00:00:48,132 --> 00:00:49,732 "Killed by badger." 15 00:00:52,093 --> 00:00:52,969 How's that? 16 00:00:54,020 --> 00:00:56,613 It was Thanksgiving. Uncle Carl said: 17 00:00:56,738 --> 00:00:59,293 "I think there's a badger living in our chimney. 18 00:00:59,418 --> 00:01:00,886 "Hand me that flashlight." 19 00:01:03,296 --> 00:01:05,549 Those were the last words he ever spoke to us. 20 00:01:06,555 --> 00:01:08,851 I don't think you need to worry about death by badgers 21 00:01:08,976 --> 00:01:10,236 being hereditary. 22 00:01:10,513 --> 00:01:11,393 Not true. 23 00:01:11,518 --> 00:01:14,483 The fight or flight instinct is coded genetically. 24 00:01:14,608 --> 00:01:18,418 Instead of fleeing, he chose to fight barehanded 25 00:01:18,543 --> 00:01:21,080 against a brawny member of the weasel family. 26 00:01:21,248 --> 00:01:24,030 Who's to say that I don't share that flawed DNA? 27 00:01:24,635 --> 00:01:26,711 You can always get a badger and find out. 28 00:01:31,100 --> 00:01:32,463 But seriously, 29 00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:35,182 even if I disregard the Uncle Carl factor, 30 00:01:35,307 --> 00:01:37,597 at best I have 60 years left. 31 00:01:37,986 --> 00:01:39,140 That long! 32 00:01:39,558 --> 00:01:41,774 60 only takes me to here. 33 00:01:41,899 --> 00:01:44,061 I need to get to here. 34 00:01:44,439 --> 00:01:45,798 What's there? 35 00:01:46,190 --> 00:01:48,473 The earliest estimate of the singularity, 36 00:01:48,598 --> 00:01:51,040 when man will be able to transfer his consciousness 37 00:01:51,165 --> 00:01:53,696 into machines and achieve immortality. 38 00:01:54,734 --> 00:01:57,020 So, you're upset about missing out 39 00:01:57,145 --> 00:01:59,785 on becoming some sort of freakish self-aware robot? 40 00:02:01,070 --> 00:02:02,386 By this much. 41 00:02:04,827 --> 00:02:07,835 - Tough break. You want eggs? - You don't get it. 42 00:02:08,410 --> 00:02:11,954 I'm going to miss so much the unified field theory, 43 00:02:12,079 --> 00:02:14,604 cold fusion, the "dogapus". 44 00:02:16,643 --> 00:02:20,230 - What's a "dogapus"? - The hybrid dog and octopus. 45 00:02:21,001 --> 00:02:22,600 Man's underwater best friend. 46 00:02:25,257 --> 00:02:27,891 - Is somebody working on that? - I was going to. 47 00:02:28,083 --> 00:02:31,008 I planned on giving it to myself on my 300th birthday. 48 00:02:31,880 --> 00:02:33,361 Wait a minute. You hate dogs. 49 00:02:33,772 --> 00:02:36,830 A dogapus can play fetch with eight balls. 50 00:02:36,955 --> 00:02:38,199 No one can hate that. 51 00:02:40,583 --> 00:02:43,309 The TBBTeam presents 52 00:02:43,601 --> 00:02:47,291 Episode 4x03: The Cruciferous Vegetable Amplification 53 00:02:47,458 --> 00:02:50,050 Synchro: Strex, kiima 54 00:02:50,217 --> 00:02:53,298 Trad: Strex, benji1000, MisterCaribou 55 00:02:53,465 --> 00:02:56,259 Relec: kiima, Titou 56 00:03:08,435 --> 00:03:10,770 - What do we owe you? - It came to $28.17. 57 00:03:10,895 --> 00:03:12,191 Let's say six bucks apiece. 58 00:03:12,904 --> 00:03:13,943 Here you go. 59 00:03:19,534 --> 00:03:20,575 What? 60 00:03:21,831 --> 00:03:24,287 - Never mind. I got it. - You wanted me to pay. 61 00:03:24,455 --> 00:03:25,455 It's no big deal. 62 00:03:25,623 --> 00:03:27,832 You're right. We're not going out, I should pay. 63 00:03:32,161 --> 00:03:32,921 What? 64 00:03:33,785 --> 00:03:37,601 He said: "If he had woman parts, he'd eat for free the rest of his life." 65 00:03:39,787 --> 00:03:41,721 but you wouldn't be able to talk to yourself. 66 00:03:45,052 --> 00:03:46,559 I'm a little low on cash. 67 00:03:46,799 --> 00:03:48,271 - How much you got? - Nothing. 68 00:03:48,945 --> 00:03:51,815 - How can you walk with no money? - I'm cute, I get by. 69 00:03:52,711 --> 00:03:54,901 It's okay, you can owe me. Sheldon, six bucks. 70 00:03:55,069 --> 00:03:58,571 No, thank you. I'm not eating pizza tonight. 71 00:03:58,739 --> 00:04:00,810 But it's Thursday. Thursday's pizza night. 72 00:04:00,935 --> 00:04:01,925 Not for me. 73 00:04:02,050 --> 00:04:05,044 Thursday is now Cruciferous Vegetable Night. 74 00:04:05,768 --> 00:04:07,264 Tonight's selection: 75 00:04:07,605 --> 00:04:08,832 Brussels sprouts. 76 00:04:09,285 --> 00:04:12,794 Really? You're changing the Sheldonian calendar? 77 00:04:13,741 --> 00:04:15,828 - It's a small price to pay. - For what? 78 00:04:16,101 --> 00:04:17,340 - Don't ask. - Sorry. 79 00:04:18,551 --> 00:04:20,816 In order to live long enough to fuse my consciousness 80 00:04:20,941 --> 00:04:23,346 with cybernetics, I need to change my diet. 81 00:04:23,607 --> 00:04:25,515 Wait. Cybernetics is robot stuff, right? 82 00:04:25,745 --> 00:04:26,516 Correct. 83 00:04:26,759 --> 00:04:29,019 You want to turn yourself into some sort of robot? 84 00:04:29,392 --> 00:04:30,851 Essentially, yes. 85 00:04:31,578 --> 00:04:33,940 Here's my question. Didn't you already do that? 86 00:04:37,171 --> 00:04:38,987 Flattering, but sadly, no. 87 00:04:40,019 --> 00:04:42,337 I'm also planning to begin an exercise regimen 88 00:04:42,462 --> 00:04:44,784 designed to strengthen my cardiovascular system. 89 00:04:44,962 --> 00:04:47,162 - AKA jogging. - Wait. 90 00:04:47,330 --> 00:04:49,422 - Honey, have you ever run before? - Certainly. 91 00:04:49,547 --> 00:04:52,550 I've run from bullies, dogs, 92 00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:54,002 angry chickens, 93 00:04:55,254 --> 00:04:57,727 and one particularly persistent P.E. teacher 94 00:04:57,852 --> 00:05:00,884 determined to bend me over and give me a scoliosis test. 95 00:05:05,181 --> 00:05:07,724 You're right, Penny jogs. Maybe you guys can run together. 96 00:05:08,012 --> 00:05:09,934 That's an excellent idea. 97 00:05:12,772 --> 00:05:16,066 If we chat, it will create the illusion of time going faster. 98 00:05:16,670 --> 00:05:17,901 No, it won't. 99 00:05:19,910 --> 00:05:21,363 How does he know I jog? 100 00:05:21,568 --> 00:05:24,630 He watches you from his car with high-powered binoculars. 101 00:05:25,743 --> 00:05:27,410 That is so creepy! 102 00:05:27,725 --> 00:05:28,747 I know! 103 00:05:32,744 --> 00:05:34,668 And he says he's not gonna stop. 104 00:05:38,005 --> 00:05:40,582 Then see a shrink and figure out how to talk to women. 105 00:05:53,330 --> 00:05:54,568 What the hell? 106 00:05:58,033 --> 00:05:59,138 What's the matter? 107 00:05:59,263 --> 00:06:03,780 I have pain radiating from my navel to my lower right abdomen. 108 00:06:04,214 --> 00:06:05,865 I'm nauseated and feverish. 109 00:06:06,429 --> 00:06:08,596 I believe I may have cholera. 110 00:06:09,047 --> 00:06:11,188 There's no cholera in Pasadena. 111 00:06:11,313 --> 00:06:14,165 Just like last summer, when there was no malaria in Pasadena. 112 00:06:14,511 --> 00:06:18,145 If it's not cholera, then based on a quick Internet search, 113 00:06:18,629 --> 00:06:21,298 the other explanations in decreasing order of likelihood 114 00:06:21,466 --> 00:06:25,220 are Hirschsprung's Disease, botulism, a 30-foot tapeworm 115 00:06:25,345 --> 00:06:28,485 or accidental ingestion of chrysanthemum blossoms. 116 00:06:29,505 --> 00:06:32,934 When would you have accidentally eaten chrysanthemum blossoms? 117 00:06:33,102 --> 00:06:35,646 It's part of an unlikely scenario that involves sleepwalking 118 00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:39,525 and a 24-hour flower mart with a less-than-vigilant proprietor. 119 00:06:39,969 --> 00:06:41,565 Lord, my belly! 120 00:06:42,274 --> 00:06:43,653 Ever had your appendix out? 121 00:06:43,830 --> 00:06:44,630 I haven't. 122 00:06:44,755 --> 00:06:46,888 I've been meaning to, but who has the time? 123 00:06:48,244 --> 00:06:49,828 Let's go to the hospital. 124 00:06:50,321 --> 00:06:52,412 So this is how it ends... 125 00:06:54,036 --> 00:06:55,559 with cruel irony. 126 00:06:55,684 --> 00:06:58,620 Just as I just make the commitment to preserving my body, 127 00:06:58,745 --> 00:07:02,130 I am betrayed by my appendix, a vestigial organ. 128 00:07:02,725 --> 00:07:05,634 Do you know the original purpose of the appendix? 129 00:07:06,844 --> 00:07:07,588 I do. 130 00:07:07,713 --> 00:07:10,087 And yet I'm doomed while you live on. 131 00:07:12,673 --> 00:07:14,494 Funny how things work out, isn't it? 132 00:07:15,061 --> 00:07:17,261 Lord, I think it's about to burst! 133 00:07:22,315 --> 00:07:23,568 On the other hand, 134 00:07:23,736 --> 00:07:26,112 it might have been the Brussels sprouts. 135 00:07:27,956 --> 00:07:29,006 Good night. 136 00:07:30,034 --> 00:07:30,944 Good night. 137 00:07:31,584 --> 00:07:32,737 Appendicitis. 138 00:07:32,862 --> 00:07:34,412 What a nervous Nelly. 139 00:07:41,793 --> 00:07:43,487 Coming, coming. 140 00:07:44,701 --> 00:07:46,459 Hey, nice knees. 141 00:07:46,584 --> 00:07:47,676 Thank you. 142 00:07:47,844 --> 00:07:48,760 They're mom's. 143 00:07:50,454 --> 00:07:53,275 Why the Flash shirt? You're gonna run really fast? 144 00:07:53,474 --> 00:07:55,985 No, it's because it's Friday, 145 00:07:56,110 --> 00:07:58,086 but it's nice when things work out. 146 00:07:58,795 --> 00:08:00,564 - Where's your monitor? - I don't have one. 147 00:08:00,732 --> 00:08:02,477 - Your pedometer? - Don't have one. 148 00:08:02,650 --> 00:08:04,901 And telematics in your shoes connected to an iPod? 149 00:08:05,695 --> 00:08:06,822 What do you do, 150 00:08:06,947 --> 00:08:09,560 you just go out there and gambol about like a bunny? 151 00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:13,618 I just run till I'm hungry, then I stop for a bear claw. 152 00:08:18,462 --> 00:08:19,624 Why are you doing that? 153 00:08:19,924 --> 00:08:22,251 It's good to stretch your muscles before you run. 154 00:08:22,420 --> 00:08:24,671 - All right. - Let's start with a toe touch. 155 00:08:32,504 --> 00:08:33,504 You do it. 156 00:08:34,885 --> 00:08:36,085 I am doing it. 157 00:08:38,983 --> 00:08:39,983 Good job. 158 00:08:40,772 --> 00:08:42,072 Can you do this? 159 00:08:44,397 --> 00:08:45,583 We'll never know. 160 00:08:46,319 --> 00:08:48,445 Let's just warm up on the run. 161 00:08:48,613 --> 00:08:49,784 Let's go. 162 00:08:49,909 --> 00:08:52,117 I've been reading up on biomechanics. 163 00:08:52,242 --> 00:08:54,149 I think you'll be surprised at my... 164 00:08:57,328 --> 00:08:59,888 - Are you okay? - I think so. 165 00:09:00,013 --> 00:09:01,943 - Let me help you up. - Thank you. 166 00:09:07,236 --> 00:09:08,776 If it makes you feel any better, 167 00:09:08,901 --> 00:09:12,010 Thursday is no longer Cruciferous Vegetable Night. 168 00:09:13,962 --> 00:09:15,857 Here's my chicken curry. 169 00:09:15,982 --> 00:09:18,107 - Howard, your shrimp biryani. - Thank you, sir. 170 00:09:18,232 --> 00:09:20,256 - Palak paneer, that's Penny. - Thanks. 171 00:09:20,584 --> 00:09:22,145 And for Rajesh Koothrappali, 172 00:09:22,313 --> 00:09:24,314 from whose homeland these tasty dishes originate, 173 00:09:24,482 --> 00:09:26,483 one large order of chicken McNuggets. 174 00:09:29,946 --> 00:09:31,154 What's my share? 175 00:09:31,322 --> 00:09:32,113 12 bucks. 176 00:09:32,281 --> 00:09:34,533 - Can I get you when I get paid? - Sure. 177 00:09:34,875 --> 00:09:36,326 What am I up to now? 178 00:09:37,383 --> 00:09:40,664 With the Indian food, the pizza, the Thai food, the tank of gas, 179 00:09:40,832 --> 00:09:42,332 the frozen yogurt 180 00:09:42,500 --> 00:09:43,800 and your rent... 181 00:09:45,094 --> 00:09:46,820 a little over $1,400. 182 00:09:50,971 --> 00:09:51,800 What now? 183 00:09:51,968 --> 00:09:54,106 He's just expressing his admiration 184 00:09:54,231 --> 00:09:56,616 that you don't even have to put out to get free stuff. 185 00:10:00,739 --> 00:10:03,189 It's not free, I'm gonna pay him back. 186 00:10:04,800 --> 00:10:06,142 Shut up! 187 00:10:08,331 --> 00:10:09,985 Sheldon, are you gonna join us? 188 00:10:10,153 --> 00:10:11,110 Coming! 189 00:10:26,127 --> 00:10:27,577 Greetings, friends. 190 00:10:28,379 --> 00:10:31,214 Greetings, whatever the hell you are. 191 00:10:31,382 --> 00:10:34,593 I'm a mobile virtual presence device. 192 00:10:34,761 --> 00:10:36,261 Recent events 193 00:10:36,429 --> 00:10:40,093 have demonstrated to me that my body is too fragile 194 00:10:40,218 --> 00:10:42,142 to endure the vicissitudes of the world. 195 00:10:43,561 --> 00:10:46,302 Until such time as I am able to transfer my consciousness, 196 00:10:46,427 --> 00:10:48,917 I shall remain in a secure location 197 00:10:49,042 --> 00:10:51,742 and interact with the world in this manner. 198 00:10:53,443 --> 00:10:56,400 Really? That's your question, when did he put a ramp in? 199 00:11:03,322 --> 00:11:04,790 You're in my spot. 200 00:11:17,826 --> 00:11:20,554 This may seem a little odd at first, 201 00:11:20,722 --> 00:11:23,096 but over time, you'll grow accustomed 202 00:11:23,221 --> 00:11:25,954 to dealing with me in this configuration. 203 00:11:26,970 --> 00:11:29,031 To be honest, I don't see much difference. 204 00:11:29,766 --> 00:11:32,266 Thank you. That's what I was going for. 205 00:11:34,589 --> 00:11:37,446 Now, Leonard, tomorrow, when we go to work, 206 00:11:37,614 --> 00:11:41,241 you'll need to allow some extra time to get me down the stairs. 207 00:11:41,732 --> 00:11:43,160 For your convenience, 208 00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:45,625 I disassemble into four pieces. 209 00:11:46,105 --> 00:11:48,123 This is ridiculous. I'm coming to talk to you. 210 00:11:48,542 --> 00:11:50,209 You don't know where I am. 211 00:11:51,962 --> 00:11:56,995 My physical body is safely ensconced in a secure, undisclosed location. 212 00:11:57,542 --> 00:11:58,717 You're in your bedroom. 213 00:11:59,330 --> 00:12:00,386 No, I'm not. 214 00:12:00,554 --> 00:12:03,472 I can hear your voice coming from your bedroom. 215 00:12:05,722 --> 00:12:06,809 No, you can't. 216 00:12:09,316 --> 00:12:10,316 Wait. 217 00:12:10,584 --> 00:12:11,722 Come back. 218 00:12:11,847 --> 00:12:12,847 Halt. 219 00:12:12,972 --> 00:12:14,895 Authorized personnel only! 220 00:12:17,688 --> 00:12:19,801 One of you weirdos want to buy my underwear? 221 00:12:19,926 --> 00:12:21,657 Only 1,400 bucks. 222 00:12:26,804 --> 00:12:28,614 Sheldon, this is ridiculous. 223 00:12:28,739 --> 00:12:29,989 I'm behind you. 224 00:12:30,227 --> 00:12:33,127 Please, look at me when you're talking to me. 225 00:12:33,761 --> 00:12:35,963 - I am looking at you. - No, you're not. 226 00:12:36,131 --> 00:12:38,264 Pay no attention to that man in the bed. 227 00:12:39,119 --> 00:12:41,562 You cannot exist as a virtual presence. 228 00:12:41,687 --> 00:12:43,813 Not here and certainly not at work. 229 00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:46,562 At my age, 230 00:12:46,975 --> 00:12:49,601 do you know how I'm statistically most likely to die? 231 00:12:49,912 --> 00:12:51,895 At the hands of your roommate? 232 00:12:52,453 --> 00:12:53,480 An accident. 233 00:12:53,732 --> 00:12:55,651 That's how I'm going to make it look. 234 00:12:56,067 --> 00:12:59,646 Until I can transfer my intellect to a more durable container, 235 00:12:59,771 --> 00:13:02,573 my body will remain safely ensconced in my bed. 236 00:13:02,741 --> 00:13:04,700 Fine, but don't expect my help. 237 00:13:04,868 --> 00:13:07,244 You have to help. It's in the roommate agreement. 238 00:13:07,412 --> 00:13:08,579 No, it's not. 239 00:13:11,060 --> 00:13:13,080 Section 74 C. 240 00:13:13,802 --> 00:13:16,340 The various obligations and duties of the parties 241 00:13:16,465 --> 00:13:18,918 in the event one of them becomes a robot. 242 00:13:20,813 --> 00:13:21,971 I'll be damned. 243 00:13:33,798 --> 00:13:35,152 This is delightful. 244 00:13:37,916 --> 00:13:41,529 It's much easier to enjoy the picturesque route we travel to work 245 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:44,572 when you remove the specter of fiery vehicular death. 246 00:13:45,183 --> 00:13:47,685 Refresh my memory. Why didn't I put you in the trunk? 247 00:13:48,844 --> 00:13:50,891 Because I called shotgun. Remember? 248 00:13:51,996 --> 00:13:52,979 Right. 249 00:13:58,289 --> 00:13:59,808 You seem tense. 250 00:14:01,612 --> 00:14:03,447 Perhaps this will relax you. 251 00:14:12,602 --> 00:14:14,101 I don't wanna listen to music. 252 00:14:16,901 --> 00:14:17,897 Very well. 253 00:14:18,981 --> 00:14:21,943 I don't understand why you're not enjoying this. 254 00:14:22,458 --> 00:14:26,080 Together, in this car, with my enhanced capabilities, 255 00:14:26,205 --> 00:14:27,798 we're like Knight Rider. 256 00:14:29,226 --> 00:14:32,088 Except in Knight Rider, the car isn't a yammering sphincter. 257 00:14:34,050 --> 00:14:35,558 You mock the sphincter, 258 00:14:35,683 --> 00:14:40,891 but it's a class of muscle without which human beings couldn't survive. 259 00:14:44,363 --> 00:14:48,036 There are over 50 different sphincters in the human body. 260 00:14:48,161 --> 00:14:49,646 How many can you name? 261 00:14:51,258 --> 00:14:53,785 I was wrong, this is exactly like Knight Rider. 262 00:14:55,477 --> 00:14:57,799 Perhaps you'd be interested in a different game. 263 00:14:58,609 --> 00:15:01,969 This is a photograph of the 1911 Solvay Conference 264 00:15:02,094 --> 00:15:04,479 on the theory of radiation and quanta. 265 00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:08,460 Using Photoshop, I've introduced a few anachronisms. 266 00:15:08,585 --> 00:15:10,576 See if you can spot all 24. 267 00:15:10,744 --> 00:15:12,119 I'll give you the first one. 268 00:15:12,723 --> 00:15:16,224 Madame Curie should not be wearing a digital watch. 269 00:15:17,057 --> 00:15:18,057 And go. 270 00:15:20,963 --> 00:15:21,795 That's it. 271 00:15:29,375 --> 00:15:31,180 I have an override switch. 272 00:15:31,552 --> 00:15:32,765 I almost died! 273 00:15:33,247 --> 00:15:35,139 And I'm safe and sound in bed. 274 00:15:35,264 --> 00:15:36,521 Who's crazy now? 275 00:15:37,845 --> 00:15:39,538 I'm still gonna go with you. 276 00:15:46,236 --> 00:15:47,919 Hello, Professor Hoskins. 277 00:15:48,837 --> 00:15:50,393 Nice to see you, Mindy. 278 00:15:51,362 --> 00:15:53,279 Konnichiwa, Dr. Nakamora. 279 00:15:54,199 --> 00:15:57,039 Sorry the Swedes disproved your theory. 280 00:16:05,474 --> 00:16:06,382 My door. 281 00:16:06,671 --> 00:16:07,633 What about it? 282 00:16:07,841 --> 00:16:09,971 Be a lamb and open it for me. 283 00:16:10,908 --> 00:16:12,263 Why? What's the problem? 284 00:16:18,768 --> 00:16:20,834 You think you have me stymied, don't you? 285 00:16:22,358 --> 00:16:24,367 I think a doorknob has you stymied. 286 00:16:26,299 --> 00:16:29,071 Look, it's Leonard and R2-D-Bag. 287 00:16:31,241 --> 00:16:33,995 That's my joke, I told it last night. You can't use it. 288 00:16:36,130 --> 00:16:38,380 Be a lamb and open the door for me. 289 00:16:38,582 --> 00:16:39,790 Sure. 290 00:16:43,615 --> 00:16:44,673 He's a lamb. 291 00:16:45,034 --> 00:16:46,018 You're not. 292 00:16:49,555 --> 00:16:50,605 I'm a lamb. 293 00:16:54,270 --> 00:16:55,639 Isn't this nice? 294 00:16:56,025 --> 00:16:58,601 The pleasures of fellowship and camaraderie 295 00:16:58,925 --> 00:17:02,093 without having to tolerate your germy breath on my skin. 296 00:17:03,176 --> 00:17:06,301 Let's take him to Tatooine and sell him to some Jawas. 297 00:17:07,641 --> 00:17:09,633 That's two, dude. Write your own jokes. 298 00:17:12,474 --> 00:17:13,282 Great. 299 00:17:15,359 --> 00:17:17,036 I'm Penny, I'll be your waitress. 300 00:17:17,204 --> 00:17:18,621 You're introducing yourself? 301 00:17:18,829 --> 00:17:22,166 I'd rather people not know I've prior connection to you whatsoever. 302 00:17:23,377 --> 00:17:25,461 Can you tell me the specials this evening? 303 00:17:25,629 --> 00:17:26,962 I'm not waiting on you. 304 00:17:27,130 --> 00:17:29,623 Obviously. I don't even have water yet. 305 00:17:30,342 --> 00:17:31,801 Because you're not here. 306 00:17:32,164 --> 00:17:35,054 That's discrimination against the otherwise located. 307 00:17:36,516 --> 00:17:37,973 I'll have to go over your head. 308 00:17:40,773 --> 00:17:41,773 Manager! 309 00:17:44,299 --> 00:17:47,212 Lord, look who it is. 310 00:17:48,857 --> 00:17:51,737 - Is that Steve Wozniak? - I think it is. 311 00:17:51,905 --> 00:17:54,167 The Great and Powerful Woz. 312 00:17:56,125 --> 00:17:59,995 He was one of the co-founders of Apple Computer. He and Steve Jobs... 313 00:18:00,163 --> 00:18:01,956 I know. I watch Dancing with the Stars. 314 00:18:03,699 --> 00:18:05,167 I must speak to him. 315 00:18:05,470 --> 00:18:06,418 Of course. 316 00:18:09,423 --> 00:18:11,365 There's an Olive Garden down the street, 317 00:18:11,490 --> 00:18:12,784 you should try it. 318 00:18:14,979 --> 00:18:17,008 Excuse me, Mr. Wozniak? 319 00:18:18,253 --> 00:18:19,890 Nice virtual presence device. 320 00:18:20,909 --> 00:18:23,498 I just want to say I'm a big fan. 321 00:18:23,623 --> 00:18:26,822 You're my 15th favorite technological visionary. 322 00:18:27,695 --> 00:18:28,691 Only 15th? 323 00:18:29,737 --> 00:18:32,251 It's still 6 spots above Steve Jobs. 324 00:18:34,047 --> 00:18:36,435 I care neither for turtlenecks nor showmanship. 325 00:18:37,632 --> 00:18:39,519 I never got that turtleneck thing. 326 00:18:40,410 --> 00:18:42,163 One of my proudest possessions 327 00:18:42,331 --> 00:18:44,982 is a vintage 1977 Apple Two. 328 00:18:45,332 --> 00:18:48,755 Despite the file system limitations of Apple DOS 3.3, 329 00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:50,946 it was a pretty nifty little achievement. 330 00:18:51,296 --> 00:18:53,090 Thanks, we were shooting for "nifty". 331 00:18:54,217 --> 00:18:56,539 If you had it here, I'd autograph it for you. 332 00:18:58,212 --> 00:19:01,814 Don't move for 15 to 30 minutes, depending on how the buses are running. 333 00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:05,863 Nerds. 334 00:19:10,347 --> 00:19:12,463 I'm coming, Woz, I'm coming. 335 00:19:41,451 --> 00:19:42,746 What up, Shel-Bot? 336 00:19:43,732 --> 00:19:45,138 I can't get out of bed. 337 00:19:45,421 --> 00:19:46,477 I hurt my ankle. 338 00:19:46,839 --> 00:19:48,187 What do you want me to do? 339 00:19:48,691 --> 00:19:50,110 Sing me Soft Kitty. 340 00:19:52,069 --> 00:19:54,818 You want me to sing Soft Kitty to a computer monitor? 341 00:19:55,362 --> 00:19:57,696 Would you rather come over and sing it to me in person? 342 00:19:57,864 --> 00:20:01,191 Soft kitty, warm kitty 343 00:20:01,316 --> 00:20:03,786 Little ball of fur 344 00:20:03,993 --> 00:20:05,454 Closer to the microphone. 345 00:20:07,197 --> 00:20:10,111 Happy kitty, sleepy... 346 00:20:10,977 --> 00:20:12,404 You have to start over. 347 00:20:14,650 --> 00:20:17,724 Soft kitty, warm kitty 348 00:20:17,849 --> 00:20:20,413 Little ball of fur 349 00:20:20,943 --> 00:20:24,099 Happy kitty, sleepy kitty 350 00:20:24,224 --> 00:20:26,308 Purr, purr, purr